Diary of An Unrequited Love

By: Richey


Chapter Nine

"Hey Kev wake up."

I shook Kevin trying to wake him up.

He rolled over and looked at me.

"Is it time to get up already?" He mumbled.


I could tell that sleep wasn't something that came easy to either one of us that night. I spent most of the night tossing and turning and thinking of the huge fight that happened with Eric earlier.

Kevin reached over to the night table, grabbed his glasses and put them on. He reached up and touched my right eye.

"That doesn't look so good."

I knew it didn't look that good. I had saw it when I got up. My eye was black and blue and was swollen shut.

It hurt really bad.

"I'll be fine." I sat down on the bed next to him. "You okay?"

"Yeah." He replied. "I'm fine."

I could tell by the tone of voice that something was bothering him. He didn't sound fine at all. There was a certain sadness in his voice that I couldn't describe.

He tossed the covers off of himself and smiled at me.

"I love you." He reached over and squeezed my hand. "I wish we could just skip class and lay in bed together all day."

"Me too." I leaned down and kissed him. "Are you sure everything is okay?"

"Yes. It's fine."

"Do you think Eric will remember anything from last night?" I asked Kevin.

He shook his head.

"I honestly doubt it. He was so drunk last night he probably doesn't even remember coming over here."

I had accepted the fact that I was gay. I just wanted to tell people on my terms and not the terms of someone else. I just hoped Kevin was right and Eric didn't remember anything.

I looked at the alarm clock and it read 6:45.

"You should probably get up and get dressed." I suggested.

"I know."

Kevin looked at me with a puzzled look on his face as the home phone started ringing. It was very seldom that that phone ever rang. Everyone always called us on our cell phones if they needed to get a hold of us.

Neither one of us wanted to get up to answer the phone. It finally stopped ringing and the answer machine picked up.

"Hey Kevin, it's your mom. I tried calling your cell phone and it went straight to your voicemail. I need you to call me as soon as you can. I have to go to work here in a little bit."

The answering machine beeped as Kristen hung up the phone.

"I wonder what she wants?" Kevin asked. "It's too early to talk on the phone. I hate getting up early."

"Who knows, you going to call her back?" I asked.

"Maybe later."

He wrapped his arms around my neck and pulled me on top of him. He blew his breath in my face then kissed me making sure to stick his tongue in my mouth.

He laughed.

"You have my morning breath now.

I raised up and licked my lips.

"Pretty tasty." I giggled. "I guess I can spend the rest of my life with that."

Kevin rolled over a little more and sat up on the edge of the bed next to me.

"As much as I hate to I guess I will go take a shower now."

He raised his arm up sniffed it then put his arm pit in my face.

"That stinks. Go take a shower."

He stood up and looked at me.

"You can join me if you want."

I grinned at him. Unfortunately I had already showered.

"Well, if you would have asked me about twenty minutes ago, I would have jumped all over that offer."

"Tonight then."

He smiled at me then headed out the bedroom door.



It seemed like everyone in my College Round Table class seemed to ask me what happened to my face.

I just told them all the same thing. Kevin and I had been wrestling around and I caught an elbow to the eye.

I didn't exactly want everyone to know that I got attacked when a friend of my boyfriend's caught us in bed together.

College Round Table went by pretty slowly. Professor Randall lectured the whole time about the basics of filling out a resume. Pretty basic stuff which made it really boring for me.

She finally stopped lecturing and dismissed everyone except for me.

After everyone had left the classroom and I was the only one left in there, she walked over to my desk and stood next to me.

"I couldn't help but notice your face." She commented. "Is everything okay with you?"

This wasn't exactly what I was expecting of her. I kind of figured that maybe I had bombed a paper or something, but she seemed genuinely concerned about me.

"Yeah," I replied. "It's as good as it can get."

She took her glasses off and sat them down on the desk behind her. She leaned over and looked closer at my eye.

"I know you didn't really get an elbow in your eye. I can clearly see the imprint of a knuckle there." She picked her glasses up of the desk and put them back on. "I just wanted to let you know that if you want to talk about what is going on with you then you can talk to me." She smiled at me. "I can see a little bit of myself in you."

She walked over to her desk and sat back down.

This made be curious. How could I possibly remind her of herself.

I got up from my seat and walked to the front of the classroom where her desk was at.

"How do I remind you of yourself?" I asked her.

This had all taken me off guard. Professor Randall looked like and up tight extremely strick and conservative lady.

"Sit down." She motioned for me to sit down in a chair next to her desk.

"I have another class at ten." I told her.

"I'll write you a note saying you were helping me." She motioned again for me to have a seat next to her desk.

I obediently sat down in the chair next to her.

"I have English at nine and Mr. Thompson is pretty strict." I explained to her.

Professor Randall smiled at me.

"That's no problem Harry and I are good friends, so that will be no problem at all."

She took her glasses off any sat them down on her desk.

Without her glasses she looked less stern. Her eyes were a pretty emerald color. She even had a nice smile that she didn't let be seen very often during class. She didn't ever wear makeup and her face was pale.

"Just between the two of us you can call me Allison as long as you don't do it in class." She told me.


"Are you sure you are okay?" She asked me again. "I know you have gone through a lot."

She reached over and touched my eye. Just the gentle touch of her feeling my eye sent pain through my body.

She pulled her hand away.

"I'm sorry." She apologized. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

She was making me kind of nervous. I had never had a teacher show concern like this with me before. She said that I reminded her of herself, but I still didn't understand how it was that I reminded her of herself.

"It's fine." I accepted her apology.

"I just want you to know that if you need to talk to me about anything that I am here and willing to listen." She told me.


I still couldn't understand why she was so willing to listen to me.

"Um, how do I say this without being to blunt."

She leaned in closer to me. There were just a few inches between her face and my face.

"I can see how you and Kevin look at each other during my class." She whispered.

I stood up.

I had one of the second worst experiences of my life last night. It was all because of the fact that I was attracted to other guys. I didn't want to have one of my teachers treat me any different because of it. I sure as heck didn't want her being biased with Kevin for it.

She stood up from her desk.

"It's fine." She smiled at me.

She opened the bottom desk drawer, pulled out her purse and sat it down on the desk. She took out her wallet and opened it.

"I want to show you something."

She pulled out a picture and handed it to me.

The only person in it that I knew was Professor Randall. There was a little girl and another lady with shoulder length red hair.

She smiled at me. This was different than her other smiles. This was a smile of pride from showing me the picture.

"That is my little family." She announced. "The little girl is my daughter Terri and the other one is my partner Sara."

I was confused.

"Your partner?"

"My life partner." She replied.

"You're a lesbian?"

She smiled and nodded her head.

"Yes indeed." She replied. "I just want you to know that there is someone that understands what you are going through if you want to talk about it."

That was a big relief. I didn't know what was going on there for a minute.

"Is it that obvious between Kevin and me?" I asked.

"Not unless you know what to look for." She replied. "You kind of remind me of Sarah and I at your age."

I laughed.

"What is it?" She asked.

"There for a minute I thought you were about to try to kiss me."

She laughed once I said that.

"You are a cute little guy, but just aren't my type." Her face grew serious. "Do you want talk about what really happened?"

If she felt like she could share certain aspects of her personal life and trust me with it, then the least I could do was tell her what really happened to me last night. She did seem genuinely concerned about me after all.

"Last night Kevin's friend Eric walked in on us doing stuff. He was drunk and started yelling all sort of stuff at us. He punched me in the face then pushed me on the bed and started attacking me. Kevin pulled him off me and punched him in the nose and threw him out of the house."

"I see." She said. "Are you going to be okay?"

"Yes. I will be fine. I just hope Kevin will be. That is all I am worried about is making sure Kevin is okay."

"You can tell Kevin that he can come talk to me too."

She unzipped her briefcase and pulled out a business card. She handed it to me.

I looked at it. It had her name on it, office phone number and personal cell phone and email.

"If you need to get in touch with me, you can contact me any of those methods." She grabbed a piece of paper out of her brief case and wrote something on it. She handed it to me. "Give that to Harry Thompson and you will be excused from class." She stood up from her desk. "I have a meeting that I have to get to. If you need to talk to anyone, just call me."

"Thanks a lot." I told her.


She picked up her briefcase and zipped it.

I walked over to my desk and gathered up my book and notebook and crammed them inside my backpack.

"Take care Ryan."

I turned around and smiled at her before I left the classroom.

When I made it to my English class, Mr. Thompson was in the middle of his lecture. I went over to an empty seat and sat down.

Mr. Thompson called me out in the front of the class and wanted to know why I was late getting to his class and that it was absolutely unacceptable.

I handed him the note that Professor Randall hand written and he didn't say anything else about it.

He continued his lecture over how to write a proper thesis statement. He didn't stop his lecture until right at 9:50. He then assigned us our very own thesis statement that we had to come up with and turn in on Friday.

Humanities was much more interesting. It flew bye. We had to work in pairs and were each assigned a Shakespeare play in which we had to take and rewrite it in modern day time. It would be due in two weeks.


"How was your day?" I asked Kevin as we both sat down at an empty table in the cafeteria.

I had gotten a burger and fry. I had decided on the first day that it was one of the best things that they had to choose from. Kevin had gotten a pizza, I didn't care much for them because when you picked them up grease just dripped off them.

Kevin said he loved the taste of it. I honestly don't see how he wasn't fat. He ate some of the most fattening foods that you could imagine.

"It was pretty good."

He picked his pizza up, grease was dripping off of it, and took a huge bite out of it.

"What about you? What did Professor Randall want?"

"It had to do with you too?" I replied as I picked up one of my fries and shoved it in my mouth.


"She just wanted to let me know that she knew you didn't elbow me in the eye and that if I ever needed to talk to anyone that I could talk to her."

I picked up my code red and took a sip of it.

"That's cool." He paused for a minute. "What does that have to do with me though?"

"She knows that we are together."

"What?" He asked. "Why did you tell her?"

"I didn't. She just knew she is a lesbian."

Kevin smiled.

"I was right. I knew it."

I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone. I unlocked the screen and saw that I had two missed calls and a text message from Aunt Faye.

The text message said to call her as soon as I got it.

I dialed her number and it rang twice before she answered.

"Hi Ryan." She answered.

"Hey Aunt Faye."

I took a bite out of my burger. As much as I hated talking to people with my mouth full I was starving.

"I just got a call from the prosecuting attorney." She explained.

I was getting nervous. Maybe he had called to tell that the jury had reached a verdict.

"It's Aunt Faye." I whispered to Kevin. "She said the prosecuting attorney called her earlier."

"Sweet." Kevin commented. "I hope they fry that bitch."

"I'm on my lunch break Aunt Faye." I told her. "Kevin is here with me. Do you care if I put you on speaker so he can hear also."

"No problem sweetie." She told me. "Go right ahead."

I pressed the button on my phone to turn the speaker on and laid it down on the middle of the table.

"Go ahead Aunt Faye."

"Well as I was saying, I got a call from Christopher Taylor, the prosecuting attorney, earlier. I have some news."

"Did they find that bitch guilty and decide to fry her right then and there?" Kevin asked coldly.

Aunt Faye took a deep breath.

"I'm afraid not boys."

I couldn't believe this.

This was my worst fear. How could anyone in their right mind find her not guilty for what she did?

I stuck my hand under my shirt and felt of my scar.

I shook my head.

I just didn't understand.

"How could they not find her guilty?" I could feel tears starting to form. "She killed my family in cold blood and tried to kill me twice."

Kevin's face was turning red. He took a couple deep breaths.

"I'm going to kill that bitch with my bare hands if I have too. She isn't getting away with this."

"Calm down for a minute boys and let me finish."

"Sorry." I said calmly. "Go ahead."

"This morning, Cynthia was found dead in her bed. She had a sheet wrapped around her neck." Aunt Faye explained.

"She killed herself?" I asked.

This was news to me. She didn't seem one bit remorseful about her actions. I honestly can't picture her deciding now that what she did was wrong.

"They aren't sure yet." She explained. "She had two other cell mates and it's being investigated right now. They think that maybe one of her cell mates did it. Either way it looks like that bitch got what she deserved."

Kevin and I both smiled. It was a big relief for me. Now I wouldn't have to worry about whether or not a jury would have to find her guilty or not. It looks like maybe one of her cell mates decided to play judge, jury and executioner.

I was elated with joy from the news.

"Thank you for letting me know Aunt Faye."

"It's my pleasure Ryan." She paused for a minute. "Listen Ryan if you don't need anything, I am going to fly to Detroit this afternoon and go to Brice's early."

"No. It's fine. Be sure to tell him that I said hi."

I didn't want her cancelling her plans to go see her youngest son on account of me. Besides I had one of the best groups of friends there for me.

"I love you Ryan and if you need anything don't hesistate to call me and if you can't get in touch with me call Brice."

"I love you too Aunt Faye and have a safe trip."

I pressed end and hung up the phone.

"Yeah!" I shouted, forgetting where I was at.

I could see people turn and look at me to see what I was yelling about. I didn't care I was overjoyed. She was gone and I didn't have to worry about ever seeing her again.

I just wish her life could have been exchanged for my family's lives.

"Let me see your phone so I can check my messages. I left my phone at home."

Kevin picked my phone up and dialed his number. I watched him crinkle up his face and roll his eyes as he listened to his messages.

He ended the call and sat the phone back down on the table.

"What is that face all about?" I asked.

"My mom filled up my voicemail box. The same message every time telling me to call her as soon as I got this message."

"You think everything is okay?"

I was getting kind of concerned. It wasn't like Kristen to call Kevin and leave him so many voice messages telling him to call her as soon as he got the message.

"Yeah." He shoved the rest of the pizza into his mouth. "If it wasn't okay then she would have called your phone. She has your number and she knows that we are together most of the time."

"I never thought of that."

Still kind of puzzled me trying to figure out what was so important that she called Kevin so many times that she filled up his mail box.

I finished my burger and fries as Kevin sat there and watched me eat. He had chowded down on his pizza like it was his last meal or something.

I finished up eating and we walked around campus until it was time for American History.

We had a pop quiz in there. I hate pop quizzes I usually don't do so well on them because I get nervous.

After the pop quiz we were given a reading assignment and dismissed for the day. Apparently Dr. Frost had a meeting with the history department he had to be at. It had started at one-thirty and he had completely forgotten about it.



"I am so f-ing tired." Dan complained as he reclined back in the recliner.

It seemed like that recliner had become one of Dan's favorite places to sit whenever he came over. I'm pretty sure it had a permanent imprint of his butt on it.

Kevin and I were sitting right next to each other on the couch.

"You aren't the only one." I replied.

Dan shook his head.

"You just wait until I see Eric again. I'm going to beat his fucking ass. People are just pissing me off here lately. My dad says that I have to start paying rent since I didn't go to college. I am sick of living there."

The first thing that he noticed when he came over was of course my black eye. I explained in detail everything that happened last night.

He was already mad because Eric kept calling him all night waking him up. This only added fuel to the fire.

There was a knock on the door. I glanced up at the clock and saw that it was a little after five.

"It's open." Kevin shouted.

The door opened and Haleigh and Mike came in.

"You're about five minutes late for this little shin dig." Kevin told them.

Haleigh and Mike both looked at me.

"Oh my gosh! What happened to you?" Haleigh asked.

I told her the whole story. I had told that story so many times today that it was starting to get old.

Haleigh walked over to the couch and sat down next to me. Mike squeezed in next to Haleigh.

"What's that dude's problem?" Mike asked.

I shrugged my shoulders.

"He thinks I turned Kevin gay. He hated me anyhow and now this just makes him hate me even more."

"Don't worry about him." Mike looked over at me. "People like him just don't like themselves and feel insecure as a man."

Haleigh shook her head.

"I just can't believe this." She leaned forward and turned her head to look at me. "What are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing." I replied. "I think Kevin got his point across loud and clear last night to him. I don't think he will be back around for awhile."

Dan's cell phone started vibrating across the table where he had left it sitting at when he came over. He picked it up and looked at the screen.

"It's Eric."

He pressed the answer button and put the phone up to his ear.

"Hello." He paused. "Hang on for just a sec."

He took the phone away from his ear and turned the speaker on.

"You still there man?"


"What did ya want?" Dan asked.

"I fucking walked in on Kevin and Ryan fucking fucking last night. They are a bunch of fags!" Eric exclaimed.


"They are butt pirates!" Eric yelled. "Ryan turned Kevin gay! What are we going to do?"

"We aren't going to do anything." Dan replied calmly. "They are two of my best friends that just happen to be gay and in love with each other. I'm happy for them."

"What!" Eric shouted. "Are you one of them?"

"No I'm not. They are my friends and I am going to stand up for them."

"You are going to regret this." Eric hung up the phone.

Dan sat his phone back down on the table.

"That dude is crazy." He stated.

"Thanks a lot for that." Kevin was very gracious for what Dan had did.

Dan stood up and walked over to where Kevin and I were sitting at. He leaned over and pulled Kevin and I into a group hug.

"Thanks." I said as I hugged him back.

He released the hug and went back to the recliner and sat down.

"Cynthia was killed earlier today." I announced.

"What!" Haleigh exclaimed.

"They think one of her cell mates killed her this morning they found her with a sheet wrapped around her neck and she was dead." I explained the short version of what had happened.

"Wow." Haleigh said. "I can't believe it."

The front flew open. The door knob busted a hole in the wall.

Kristen walked inside the living room. She looked around at Haleigh, Mike and Dan.

"I need all of you to leave except for my son and Ryan."

Her face was red. She was all sweaty and you could tell that she was pissed off by the angry look plastered on her face.

Dan, Haleigh and Mike all jumped up from where they were sitting.

They had all been over there at one point when Kristen still lived there. They knew that when she got mad it was like being in the middle of a storm. You didn't want to cross her.

They all filed out the door one by one. I could hear doors closing and the sounds of their respective vehicles starting up.

Kristen grabbed the door and slammed it shut.

"What is the matter mom?" Kevin asked.

Neither one of us knew what was the matter with her. We couldn't think of anything that we could have done to make her this upset.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

She looked at both Kevin and me.

We hadn't moved away from each other. He was still sitting right next to me as close as he could be without sitting on my lap. Our fingers were still intertwined.

Kevin pulled his hand away from me.

Kristen shook her head and looked at me.

"I felt sorry for you Ryan. I could have sold this house for a nice sum of money, but I decided to let you and Kevin live here for practically nothing." She put her hands on my hips and glared at me. "You come into my house and do only God knows what with my son. My son isn't gay." She shook her head. "No way no how!"

I looked at Kevin. I couldn't read his expression. There wasn't one on his face that was readable.

"Mom, please stop." Kevin pleaded.

She shook her head.

"Shut up Kevin!"

She looked at me.

"I can't believe you would come into my house and have sex with my son!"

She looked at Kevin.

"I thought I raised you better than that! You disappointed me badly. Do you know what is like to be called first thing this morning by Eric and have him tell me that he walked in on you two about to do who knows what."

"I love Ryan." Kevin said.

"Ryan you need to leave!" She shouted. "You aren't welcome here anymore."

"What?" I wasn't sure if I heard her right.

"You need to get your stuff and get the hell out of my house." She looked at Kevin. "You get your things also you are moving in with me and Steve. I am calling a real estate agent and listing this house first thing in the morning."

I couldn't hold it any anymore.

I couldn't believe she was doing this. I didn't deserve this and neither did Kevin. I had nowhere to go.

"Kevin?" I looked at him pleadingly.

His eyes were red.

"I don't know what to do." He replied. "I have nowhere else to go."

"Get your things!" Kristen demanded.

"Mom!" Kevin shouted. "Please don't do this."

Kristen walked over to Kevin and slapped him across his face.

"This ends here and now!"

I stood up from the couch. My eyes were so wet from crying that I could barely see what was in front of me.

Kevin grabbed my hand and held it. He looked up at me with a look in his face that I just couldn't read.

"What do you think your father would think if he were still alive?" Kristen asked.

"I don't know mom!" Kevin shouted. "You can't do this."

"I can. This is still my house and if I remember correctly my name is on the paper work." She had put on her best emotionless bitch face that she could muster up.

"He has nowhere to go!" Kevin shouted.

"He should have thought about that!" Kristen was getting furious. "You are lucky that I don't do the same to you."

"I'm an adult mom!" Kevin yelled. "You can do this. It's bullshit!"

Kristen slapped Kevin across his face.

"Don't you ever talk to me like that again!"

Kevin looked up at his mom.

"I hate you."

"You have no place to go Kevin the cards have been dealt." She looked at me. "You have ten minutes to get your things and get the hell out of my house."

I ran to my room and grabbed a bag. I cried and cried as I crammed as much as I could into a duffle bag. I looked around the room. I would come back to get my television and bigger stuff later. I walked over to the desk and picked up my laptop.

Maybe Kevin could talk to her.

I walked into the living room with my backpack slung over one shoulder, my duffle bag over the other and my laptop under my arm.

I looked at Kevin. His eyes were red. Tears were running down his face.

I walked outside and got inside my car. I sat there as the tears streamed down my cheeks. I didn't have anywhere to go.

It felt like the world that I had come to know was falling in on me and I had no idea what to do about it.

Well, I hope you all enjoyed chapter nine. Sorry for such a suspenseful ending. There is more to come. I look forward to your comments email me rwill161@att.net J