Being Josh

Authors Note: I thank all the readers who mailed me. Now I know that there are people who are reading my stuff and loving my characters! Please keep those mails coming and comment on the second part. Your suggestions/comments are welcome at Thank you.

Part II : I have a boy friend!

"I'm ga..," I whispered. Before I could finish, his lips met mine. He closed his eyes. I was still watching him, so close, so close my body. He kissed me. I could feel my heart beating so fast, like the first time I saw Sam. I closed my eyes. I could see bright colors. I could no longer feel my legs, my knees were giving away, I couldn't stand any longer. As if Sam read my mind, he held me in his strong arms. I held him in mine. And we kissed harder. I was flying with him now. I was in heaven, flying to god, thanking him for this moment.

"Are you in a mood for a swim?" Sam asked.

"It is so hot, sure!" I said.

We stripped ourselves in front of each other. Sam was wearing boxer briefs and I couldn't help myself admire his bulge. I looked up and saw that he was admiring my bulge in my bikini!

"Wow! The water is so cool!" I said.

"Yeah. The water comes from a waterfall nearby!"

"Do you own these mountains?!?" I mocked him.

"Ha-ha! My father owns land here on this hill and another hill adjacent to this. Land on that hill is barren and he wants me to suggest what I should construct there!"

"You will design whatever is going to built there?"

"Yeah," Sam said as he jumped into the pool.

"Josh, follow me," he said. Sam disappeared under the water. I dived in too.

I could see him again coming closer to me insider the water. We kissed under water. I had never thought about kissing under water. Kissing Sam, by itself was so amazing, doing it with water touching every inch of your body, felt even more amazing. I felt like the water was absorbing the heat we were generating.

We kissed till we ran out of breath and then came up. It was 12:30 PM. We ate lunch in the hall and then Sam asked me what I wanted to do now.

"Let us go to the adjacent hill"


We drove to the hill and Sam stopped the car when the road ended abruptly.

"You see that tree? We own the land from here till that tree," said Sam pointing to a pine tree miles from where we were standing.

"So what do you plan to do here?"

"RESORTS. Definitely! What else could work better on a hill like this? There are mountains for camping, animals to see, it is a perfect tourist spot!"

"Yeah. Just perfect."

We drove along the hill, saw the waterfall from far away and came back to the residence at 4.

"What now?" I asked.

"Lets go back home," Sam said, "I have some plans with Alexander and Cynthia. You want to come with us?"

"I want to Sam. But I have got some assignments to complete. Damn!" How I wish I had completed them yesterday!

"Okay then lets go"

When we reached the city it was 6 PM.

"Bye! See you tomorrow! I will miss you my boy!" Sam said and gave me a quick kiss.

My boy, again?! This time I was really his boy. And I was so lucky to be someone's boy at last.

I liked the way things were going with Sam. We were going in the right pace. I wanted a perfect relationship with him. I knew one thing; he was more interested in me than having sex with me!

When I returned to the apartment I noticed that the TV was off. I inferred that Jake was hanging out. But I could hear moaning coming from his room! Oh my god! Was he...? With a girl?

"Jake...?" I shouted from outside his room.

"Come in..." he said in a strange voice.

Jake was lying on the bed. He was alone to my relief. Seeing his face I immediately understood that something was wrong with him.

"Hey...what happened?"

"Nothing...just a little sick..."

Looking at him I was convinced he was very sick.

I kept my hand on his forehead.



"I'm taking you to the hospital..."

"No...Josh. Listen. It happens to me often. I will be okay. It will go down...don't over rea..."

Before he could finish the sentence his facial expressions changed so quickly. I knew what was wrong with him. He was getting nausea. I quickly ran to the bathroom.

"Damn! Where the fuck is it? Shit..."

I ran back to Jake and quickly gave him a drug for nausea. I then gave him an antibiotic for high fever.

I stay awake till one in the morning. I was afraid something would happen to Jake. He kept insisting that these things happen to him and I shouldn't take him to the hospital. I made chicken soup for him. Checked his temperature every hour to make sure it wasn't going higher than 101 degree Fahrenheit. If it did I decided to take Jake to the hospital no matter what he said.

But Jake was right. The temperature started coming down slowly. The next morning I woke up at 6 AM and checked again. He was now normal. He smiled at me.

"I scared you didn't I?"

"Fuck Jake! You scared the shit out of me"

"I get these attacks from time to time."

"Well I just didn't want anything to happen to you, you are my best friend" I had called him my best friend for the first time. And something felt so good about saying it.

"Nothing is wrong with me Jake. Nothing."

Everything was wrong. In the morning Jenny (Jake's dance partner) called up worried. She told me that Jake called her, but she had gone to her parents. I knew that Jake wouldn't call up Jenny unless he was really sick. And he had no one to help him. All he had to do is take some drugs, but there was no one who could get them for him. He was lying, god knows how long, on that bed helpless and in pain. Some where inside me I could hear -- You have failed Josh. You were not there for Jake when he needed you most. What kind of friend are you? And what is your excuse? You were romancing with Sam?

A few days later Sam invited me again to the restaurant for dinner.

"What is wrong?" Sam asked me.

"I don't know Sam. I feel I'm forgetting something. I don't know what!" I said.

"Think hard baby. You will remember."

"No. I can't remember. But I know it is something important...I just wish I could remember. Shit!" I said.

"Okay. Is this some kind of weird way of telling me you want to go to bed with me?"


"Because if you want, I'm ready for you baby"

"I'm going to make you wait a little longer for that."

"How long?" he asked impatiently "Is sixty minutes enough. I can eat fast."

"How about sixty days?"

"What is wrong in doing it tonight?"

"Sam. I feel I want to know you more. You have built this shield around you. I want to know the real Sam. I want to go to bed with the real Sam"

"Ok dude. We will wait then..."

After we ate dinner we went to the park. We sat on a bench which overlooked the lake. The entire park was lit up brightly and I could see people still roaming at this hour of the night.

"What the heck are you doing?" I asked as I felt Sam's hand in my thighs.

"Shut up. Just relax. You haven't felt anything like this ever in your life!"

He was right. Whatever he did, I didn't feel anything like it before. I couldn't help myself moaning as he made movements with his hands on my thighs, between them, near my penis. It wasn't exactly massaging, it was different.

"WOW! Where did you learn how to do that?" I asked.

"That's a secret babe. I will teach you once you become my boy."

My boy again. Whatever he meant by that. Maybe I would become his boy once I had sex with him. Maybe that is what he meant.

When I returned home it was 11:45 PM.

"Boy you seem happy tonight!" Jake said.

How I wish I could tell him that I had found myself a boyfriend who did things with my thighs that brought ecstasy.

"I just had a nice day," I said.

"Well, then you must have completed the assignment."

The assignment. THE GOD DAMN FREAKING ASSIGNMENT! That was what I had forgotten. We had three days time to submit it and it was crucial for our grade for the final term. All the three nights I had spent with Sam! And Sam was in a different Batch; his assignment submission was already over!

"JOSH?" Jake said.

"The assignment...I...I...forgot all about it..."

"Shit man!"

"Oh my god. How could I be so foolish? How can I forget such an important thing Jake?"

Jake looked at the clock behind us.

"You have 8 hours. Let us get to work"

So Jake and I sat all night and completed my assignment. I was amazed seeing how Jake could copy sketches of architectural structures in a jiffy. He was a pro. He did more work than me because of his speed and accuracy. It was 7 in the morning when we finished my pending work.

"JAKE! I don't know how to thank you. I really owe you for this big time. I don't know what I will do without you."

He just smiled back.

"Now you hurry, or else you will not make it to college"

On the way to the college I recollected what I had said: I really owe you for this big time. Again I started feeling guilty. Jake was giving and giving and I was taking it without giving anything back. All the fun nights we had, I remembered every one of them. I no longer spent time with Jake after Sam came along. Jake had been there for me when I needed him. But I had failed him. I decided that one day I would make up for it.

After the assignment crap I went to the next class room. Sam's class was still going on. I could see the teacher's mouth moving. It seemed to me that he was blabbering rather than speaking sense. Then I saw Sam, he was listening with all earnest. He saw me and then winked at me. I smiled and winked back at him. After four minutes the class was concluded.

"Are you free for a movie tonight?" Sam asked.

"I would love that!" I said. Jake had been there for me when I needed him. But I had failed him. I decided that one day I would make up for it.

We went to see a French movie that Sam was dying to see. The movie was too good. After the movie...

"Shall we go to the park" I asked Sam.

"Babe...if you really want my magical hands to work on you, you can ask me whenever you want..." he said.

I blushed like a little girl.

"I don't know what you do, Sam, but I know I want it now."

So we sat on the same park bench and I could feel Sam's hand making its way up my thigh. It was as amazing as my first time.

"Hmm...more...more..." I shouted.

Sometimes I wondered that if Sam was able to bring so much pleasure just by using his hands, how wonderful he would be to have sex with! I grinned at my own nasty thoughts.

Like last time I saw around the park. This time there were less people. Under one light pole I could see four people sitting and chatting. And one of them I though was looking directly at me!


"What?? Baby, I'm Sam. Not Jake" said Sam.

"Jake...its Jake sitting there. Fuck! He saw us Sam. Jesus! Take your hands of me!"

Sam took his hands off and then looked at me, puzzled.

"Who is Jake?"

"I told you. Jake is my roommate! GOD! I hope he hasn't recognized me."

"Don't worry."

"How can I not worry? Oh god! He is still looking here...he saw me. He saw me with you Sam!!!"

"Look Josh. You have to come out one day or other. Be happy god did the dirty part for you. Now you just have to talk to him."

"I guess I'm going to have to do the talking now. BECAUSE HE IS WALKING TOWARDS US!!!" I said. I was no longer breathing. I could hear my heart beating so fast! I knew my face had lost all its color.

"Relax. Take a deep breath. Just be cool. Maybe he didn't see my hands in your thighs. It is dark out here. Relax!"

Maybe Sam was right. Jake couldn't see what we were doing. At the same time I was also thinking: if Jake could recognize me from that far, why couldn't he spot Sam's hand in my thighs! He could as well see my face and say I was sexually excited!

I was looking down at the lawn, thinking what I was going to tell him if he confronted me. I also wondered whether I was looking down because I wanted to hide. How I wish we humans could become invisible when we wanted to? How I wish!

"Josh...I thought it was you! What are you doing here?"

I looked up. Jake had his normal expression on his face. I consoled myself that he had not seen what I didn't want him to. Suddenly I remembered the first time I saw him. He is still the same handsome guy I banged on to.

"Ja...Jake! This is Sam. We were just hanging out together" My mind was thinking of saying: He was just giving me sexual pleasure.

"Hi Sam. Pleased to meet you. Josh tells me a lot about you," Jake said.
What had Jake called Sam? The creepazoid!

"Same here Jake. Josh tells me you are his best pal," Sam said.

"Ah...well I better get going. See you at home naught boy" Jake said looking at me "I was here hanging out with Jenny and her friends"

"Okay Jake. Bye!" I said softly.

NAUGHTY BOY? At that moment I realized that Jake had seen it all. He knew it. I was gay. And I was with my boyfriend: Sam.

When I returned Jake wasn't home yet. I was relieved. It have me some time to rehearse what I was going to say:

" is not what you think. He was just showing me how he had been massaged in France"

"Jake buddy. It is not what you think. I had a cramp in my thighs and Sam was helping me relieve the pain"

"Jake. Sam was just demonstrating what his girl friend did to him because it felt so good. Nothing more than that."

Damn! Nothing sounded even a little bit convincing. I was in trouble. Big trouble!

Just then the door bell rang.

He is back! And I didn't have a clue what I was going to tell him. My heart again started beating fast. I could hear each god damn beat so loudly. Sometimes I wondered whether even others could hear it. I remembered Sam's advice. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hi Jake..." I said.

"Why the fuck didn't you tell me?" he said.

"Tell you what?"

"Auhuh? That you were gay!"

"Because I'm not Jake. I'm not!"

"Then did I see your ghost in the park today? Fuck! At least you could do that in a private place! I could see you moaning with pleasure. And what the heck was that creepazoid doing with you?"

" is not what you think," I said. After that I was in loss for words, for reason. I didn't know what dumb explanation to give, "I'm in love with Sam, Jake". Where the heck did that come from?

Jake sat down on the couch. He spoke nothing. His face told me he was in deep thought.

"Josh. I think I'm okay with this. But I would have appreciated it if you had told me before"

"Jake, it isn't easy coming out to a friend..."

"I know. But Sam? The creepazoid? What do you see in him?"

"Jake...I like him. I like everything about him" For a moment I was asking myself -- what do I see in Sam that I like?

"Have you know...?"

"No. We haven't. Why the heck do you wan to know that?"

"Just asking."

"I want to know him more, maybe after that."

"Okay Josh. I have some work, we will talk about this later."

Jake left the hall. That went well, I thought. At least it wasn't like with Adam.


So who the heck is Adam? I promise that you will know who he is in the next part. And will Josh hit it off with the creepazoid...err...Sam?

Stay tuned for the last part with more excitement, more twists and turns. If you have read this story please do write to me your suggestions/comments/criticism at It really, really, really helps me write more and write well.