Date: Sat, 06 Apr 2002 12:49:19 From: tim tim Subject: A big day, chapter 25 of Coach's Assistant Chapter 25 A Big Day Well here is the latest chapter. I hope you like this as much as you have done in the past. Maybe you have looked at my website before and already filled in the guestionaire I put up there about the storylines of this novel. If you did fill it in Thanks guys but more idea's and responses are welcome so visit my webpage and fill in the guestionaire. Also on the webpage you can find pictures of my main characters and of the celebrities making an appearance in this story. So if you want to visit it go to : www.geocities.com/timsfunplace Just before the next chapter will be posted the results will be put on the website. Then you must understand that I don't know any of the celebrities that are mentioned in this story and with that I also nothing mean to say about there sexual preferences. So guys sorry but this is just what I would love to see you doing. Before I am going to get on I want to honour some one. He has given me lots of inspiration to write a long story. He doesn't know me but he is one heck of a writer. I am very glad he decided to go on with his story Brian and me after we all though that it was finished. So thanks for that. If you want to see what it is about go either to my website where a link is made to the place in the nifty archive where the story is. Thanks and keep up the good work. So if you want to contact me , to let me know what you find of the story and how I should continue use : E-mail: noway16@hotmail.com or by ICQ: 36967366. So where did we leave with chapter 24: "Thanks David. If I need to, I will know where to find you". "Ok I will let you alone again with you're preparations. You must tell me what you were doing next time, because I never saw someone doing a pre-day routine concentration on exercises". "I will tell you some day David, now go and leave me to it". I felt I almost started to breakdown again, so I wanted him to leave the room as quick as he could. During the rest of the evening I concentrated on the routines and I read some new chapters of `Lord of the Rings'. Francis knew what I did before the meeting and didn't want to disturb me. So we stayed in our own rooms. I had two more meetings with the shrink this week and I think we made some progress, at least more than we did during the first meeting, but I still wasn't ready to talk with Francis about it. Now lets go on with the Big Day, chapter 25: I woke up pretty early that Saturday. This was going to be a pretty big day, after all: my first competition as a gymnast and not just any competition, no, the city school championships. Six of us were going to compete and I knew I couldn't let the others down. I know they didn't trust me enough to have a top-flight performance. Well, how could they? I'd only been in one competition so far and I knew from the past, watching others, that one mistake and a person could mess up a whole day's performance. That was something that just couldn't happen today. I couldn't let my dad or Francis or the team down. I decided to do another run through my routine in my head before getting into the shower. There was enough time. Alexei had taught me that having the routine all worked out in your mind was one of the best ways to prepare for a big competition. I had tried it a few times and it seemed to have worked. After concentrating for almost 30 minutes going through each of the six routines, I stood up and went towards the shower. I started to wonder about the dinner that night. Officially, if you looked at it, it was my second date with Francis but, my god, how the world had changed during those last two weeks! I knew he still loved me, there could be no doubt about that, but could I ever trust someone again? I had no idea that all these fears that were now out in the open, had been inside me during all those weeks. I had talked about it with my therapist and he told me that it was quite normal to have all these feelings. He agreed that the chat with my dad had brought them back alive. If I could only react the way I had before I told my dad everything! I knew I was hurting Francis by keeping some distance between us. There was nothing that I wanted more, than just be able to hold, cuddle and feel him all over and not to forget the feel of his hands all over me, touching me, making me feel desirable. I started to shake whenever I though of it. I decided that I'd better concentrate on other stuff for the time being. It was really nice how our friendship with Andrew and Peter was growing over the last week. We'd been out and had had lunch a few times together. They were coming today to cheer us on, so it looked like we really had made two new friends. The awkwardness of being together at the start seemed to have disappeared and Francis really got along with them well, too. I'm not sure how long I'd been in the shower when there was a big bang on the door. "Whoever is in there had better get out before they turn into a fish," David yelled. "Sorry David, I'm almost finished." "OK, just hurry up." I quickly finished showering and started to dry myself. Putting the towel around my waist, I walked out of the bathroom. Both David and Francis were outside waiting to use it. "I though you'd never get out of there!" David said. "Sorry, I didn't know I was in there that long." "To be honest, I'm not sure either, but I've been awake for 45 minutes and you were in there when I woke up," David answered. "Are you OK, Nick?" There it was again, the concerned look on Francis's face. I hated that. I didn't want him to worry about me but, lately, he looked like that most of the time. "Yes, just a little bit nervous. I guess." "Well, that will change as soon as you're out there and doing your routines," David said. "So, are you going in, David, or are you going to chat with Nick? If you prefer to chat, I'll just jump ahead of you." "No, Francis. I was here first, so I'm going first!" "As long as you hurry up, David. We've only got an hour before we have to leave." David jumped into the shower and Francis followed me into my room. When I looked back and saw that he was following me, he said, "You don't mind me keeping you company?" "No, of course not, Francis. Come in." "So, how did you sleep? I always have difficulties getting to sleep and I wake up early just before a competition." "No, I slept pretty well. I woke early, but I used the time to do some concentration exercises Alexei taught us." "You really use those?" "Yes, I'm much calmer when I do them, and last time my performance went so smoothly, I thought I'd try them again." "Hmmm, maybe I should try them again myself. I tried that technique when he showed us what to do, but it just didn't feel right." "Well, you should only do them if they help; otherwise, you're just fooling yourself." "I know. So you're ready for today then?" "Yes, I think I am, Francis. I'm really looking forward to doing my best and," I said with a smile, "to make you proud of me." "Oh, I like that idea, Nick, but you know I'm already proud of you making the team." "Thanks, Francis," I said, as I leaned forward to give him a kiss. I surprised myself with what I did, but it just felt right at that moment. I must have taken him by surprise, too, because he seemed to be startled by it and almost didn't kiss me back. He looked at me with a soft smile. "Where did that came from, Nick?" "Oh," I said, "just something I wanted to do. You didn't mind, did you?" "No, of course not. You just took me by surprise, you know. It has been quite some time since we kissed." "I know, but it felt good doing it now." I was just not sure why he had backed off like he did. Didn't he want me anymore? What was going on? I saw him slide towards me, presumably to give me another kiss. Did I want that? Oh god, no, I couldn't deal with the rejection again! I backed off and sat down on the bed. Immediately, I was sorry for what I did because I saw the disappointment on Francis's face. What was I doing? I started to feel shaky again. I didn't want to lose it, not in front of Francis. We both needed to concentrate on todays competition. "I think that David has finished," I said quickly, something that was true because the shower had stopped. "OK, I'll go and take a shower then. See you in a moment downstairs, Nick." I saw the pain in his eyes when he left, pain and doubt. What was I doing? Oh my god. I started to cry and I knew this was not a good way to start an important day. Somewhere in the background, I heard my cell-phone ring. I picked it up. "Yes?" "Is this Nick?" "Yes, sorry, this is Nick," I replied, trying to keep the sound of my sobbing out of my voice. "This is Alexei, Nick. Are you OK? You sound as if you've been crying." "To be honest, Alexei, I have been. Something just happened with Francis and I screwed it up again. Alexei, I have no idea what to do any more. I want him to be close to me, to hold him, but all I do is cause him pain and I have the sense that I'm pushing him further away with each attempt I make." I felt I needed to present it all at once, all my doubts, all my fears. "Wow, calm down, Nick. Take a deep breath." I did as he suggested and I tried to relax a little. "I'm going to try to make some time for us because I am starting to feel you really needed it, my friend." "Only if you can, Alexei." "No, I'll manage somehow. Maybe we can pick you up a little earlier and we can chat before we go to the dinner." "Well, that would be nice. So, you're not going to make it to the competition then?" "No, like I said, the chance of me making the meet was always slim, and the shooting didn't go well yesterday, so I'll be here until at least halfway through the afternoon." "Hmm, that's a shame, Alexei," I sighed. "Just try to concentrate on the competition for now, Nick. We'll talk about the rest later and see what I can do about it, OK?" "Thanks, Alexei. I'll see what I can do." "You're going to do just fine, Nick. Now go and do a few concentration exercises to get back in the right frame of mind. You really need to be focused on today's performance from now on. Other things will wait and won't go away." "OK, I will. Thanks, Alexei." We hung up and I knew he was right. If I could perform well, I knew Francis and my dad would both be proud of me. I didn't want them to get alarmed more than they already were. I started to concentrate again. At first it wasn't easy but the more and more I focused on my routines, the better I felt. I was disturbed by a knock on the door. "You ready for breakfast, Nick?" David yelled. "Or did you fall back asleep?" "No, I'll be downstairs in a second." I started to gather my things and went downstairs to join them for breakfast. Nothing much was said during breakfast. Normally it was me who tried to generate some conversation on a competition day but now I was on the team and I suddenly knew how the others felt. I didn't want to say too much. We finished breakfast and went to the gym where the competition was being held. A lot of cars were already there and I felt that, in addition to the athletes, a lot of people were going to be watching us, more than during the school competitions. I started to get nervous. I looked around to see if I could see my dad. I walked towards him. "Can you still put in the reserve, dad? I'm not sure if I can do this today. I don't feel too good." "Nonsense, Nick. You're just nervous, that's quite normal before a competition. You'll be alright." "You think so, dad?" "Yes, Nick. I've seen how you've progressed and you deserve the place on the team. If you really do well, I'm sure you'll end up higher in the individual ranks than you can imagine now." "But I don't feel like it at all." "Just go and prepare yourself. Don't worry about it, just try to do your best and you'll be surprised by the result." "You think?" "I know, Nick. So go and get ready and you know, however you do out there today, I'm already proud of you, making the team today. I would never have thought you had this in you, Nick." I started to blush and he said, "Go and get changed, son." I turned around and walked towards the area where the rest were changing, a little reassured but still pretty nervous about all those people who were going to be watching us. That feeling only got worse when I walked into the gym. I stayed close to Francis. We'd be competing in one group, so the six of us would all be performing on the same apparatus rather than being spit up into two groups. "Wow, what a crowd, Nick! This is really going to be great, performing front of such a large number of people." "Do you think so, Francis?" I asked, still sounding pretty insecure. "Yes, it will, but that is something you'll find out when you're on stage there in a moment." He looked at me and said, "Don't worry! You'll be fine. Just do as Alexei and I taught you and it will go well." "I hope so!" I replied. "Whatever you do out there, Nick, it's already great that you made the team, so don't worry and enjoy yourself. I think that's the most important thing to do, enjoy it." We walked to the benches near the platform where our first exercise would be held. It was one of my best, so I could give myself a great boost if I performed well on this one. I looked around and walked with the guys onto the platform to warm up. Francis was right, this was great! Being up here, in front of all these people, ready to show them what I could do. I smiled to myself. What the heck? I like to show off, so I'll be fine. Francis must have seen the smile on my face and said, "I knew you'd like it. Well, lets go and do our best. After all, that is the most we can do." I had to go second on the floor. Francis would be right behind me, and David would go last. I didn't look as the first member of our team performed, I just concentrated on my own routine. I felt a slap on my shoulder and a nudge from Francis told me I had to go on. I walked onto the floor, waited until the judges were ready and, as if in a trance, I did my entire routine, forgetting completely that anyone was watching. When I finished, it took me a while to realise that I had done really well, no mistakes. Then I became aware that there was quite a lot of noise from the audience. I looked around and waved to the audience and made my way back to the bench. When I looked at my teammates, they were looking at me in amazement. My dad jumped onto the platform. :"How did you manage to do that, Nick? There were some routines you've never done before!" I looked at him and said, "What do you mean?" "You don't even know what you did, do you?" He pushed me off the platform and towards the others before I knew what was happening. David was hugging me. What was this all about? What had I done? I had no idea what they were babbling on about. I'd just done the exercise I had been concentrating on in my head. Was there something wrong with it? I saw Francis walking onto the floor and waiting for the judges. I looked around at the others, not completely getting it. I sat down on a chair. I suddenly felt very tired. My dad sat beside me and looked me in the face. "You still have no idea what you did just now on the floor, do you?" I looked at him blankly. "Hmmm, maybe we should watch Francis first." He walked towards the edge of the platform and I followed him, looking at Francis. His performance went well and he got some applause from the audience, but not as much as I did. What was going on? He was much better than I was. His routines were much more difficult than mine. I hugged him when he came off the platform. "Way to go, Francis! Good start!" "Thanks, Nick, but not as good as yours." There it was again. What was going on? I couldn't remember any of what I did on the floor. I'd done just what I'd learned, nothing special. My dad stayed at the edge of the platform, watching the next guy on our team. I took the seat next to Francis. "Go on, Nick, you'd better change. We need to be ready for the next round and you do your warm-up first. You know how important that is." I started to change. He was right: we needed to hurry up. Being on the team as a full member, and not as a reserve, made me realise there was not much time in between exercises. We waited a while for David to perform before we went on. He did great although there was a small mistake at the end. He still got a great round of applause from the audience. I knew he was good, but I think lately he was the best on the team. I quickly walked towards him to congratulate him on his performance but the only thing he said was, "I slipped up but you didn't, Nick." I had almost no time to think about that. I got my bag and started to walk to the next apparatus. We were doing the vault now, my weakest apparatus. I just was not strong enough to compete on it. If I was going to mess up, it would be here. If you weren't a performer yourself, you wouldn't realise that strength was even more necessary on the vault than on the rings or the parallel bars. This time I was on third and David had to start. The order of performance changed like this with each round. I looked at David who was just trying to relax and concentrate on his next performance. With only like 5 minutes in between, he'd not have much time to recover. This was just about David's favourite apparatus, so he did pretty well, as expected. I started to concentrate on my routine and again I was almost late getting to the platform. Only a nudge from Francis made me realise it was my turn. Again I was concentrated completely on doing my routine, not realising much about my performance when I was finished. The audience applauded again, not as enthusiastically as they had for David but still pretty hard, something I hadn't expected because I was officially not on the level I needed to be on this apparatus to enter competitions. I saw the look on my dad's face and on those of David and Francis when I walked off the platform. My dad started to ask me something but both David and Francis said at the same time, "No, leave him alone. Don't break his concentration." My dad looked at them in surprise but he didn't say anything more. We looked at Francis's performance, which went well. He was pretty good at this also. I was really proud of the way Francis was performing. He was doing so well. I am not sure I realised it back then but I surely did when we started onto the last routine. As you can imagine, I did all my routines concentrating as hard as I could, the way Alexei had been telling me. Each time I got a look of approval from my dad and the other team members. Some of them even looked quite surprised, but David and Francis made sure nobody came too close to me, to disturb the zone I was in. Then the last apparatus came, the vault. I needed to go first and, while everyone was doing a practice run, Mike came and sat beside me. I didn't see him at first but I realised he was there when he started to speak. "Where have you been hiding all that stuff, Nick?" "What do you mean, Mike? , You know I do my best at everything I try." "Well, we've never seen this before! How long have you been practising?" Again I asked, "What do you mean, Mike?" "Well, so far, you've not done one of your own exercises but you've copied the routines from someone else." I looked at him, quite shocked. "What do you mean, Mike? No way, that is impossible. I don't have the ability to do that." "Well, still, that is what you've been doing. You don't seem to know it, but you're in the top 10 of the individual ranks at the moment." I still looked at him with a confused look on my face. "No way. That is impossible. I'm not that good." "Well, I'm not sure where you're getting it from, but you are performing like you have been training for several years instead of only a few months." Then somehow I started to realise what I'd been doing. I started to think about the routine that was in my head for the vault. I not only started to concentrate on it but I started to realise what routine it was. That was something I never had done before. I could never do that before. I needed a lot more practice to do other people's routines. Then I though of who else was doing this and I realised it was Mike's jump I was going to perform. How was this possible? Was Mike right, that I'd been doing that all along? I looked at Francis, who'd just come down from the platform after doing his warm up. "Francis?" "Yes, Nick." "What have I been doing?" "Oh, no, Mike, shit, you told him?" he asked, looking at Mike. Mike walked up to the platform to do his warm up. "Francis, tell me, what have I been doing? I can hardly remember any of it." "You are doing great, Nick, don't worry. You're doing perfect." >From Francis I looked at the scoreboard and, indeed, Mike was right. I was ranked ninth, just three place lower then David and even higher then Francis because his name was not up there. I looked back at Francis and wanted to say something but I couldn't. I didn't know what to say. "Go on, Nick. Concentrate. You need to be up there in a moment." I smiled at him and then I tried to concentrate but suddenly I just couldn't do it any more. There was no way I'd be able to do a vault I'd never done it before. I didn't see the look on Francis's face then but I heard him talking with someone. He didn't look up and try to convince me that I could do it. No way, I thought. I'd have to stick with my own routine; there was no way I could do that jump. I walked up to the platform when my name was called. I stood there and waited, for what, I have no idea. I looked at my teammates sitting beside the platform. I couldn't do it, or could I? I tried to remember my own routine but I couldn't any more. I'd been focusing so much on Mike's routine in my preparations that I just couldn't remember my own any more! Oh, no, I thought. I started to look at my dad and Francis, who were telling me to go ahead and do a vault. There was no way I could perform like Mike, no way. Well, I'd better do something, I couldn't let the others down. So I started to run towards the vault and I jumped. The next thing I knew, I was lying on my stomach on the mat. The audience went "ohhhh" and "awawww." Then I felt Francis beside me or at least I smelled him. Oh, didn't he smell nice? What was I thinking about? "Are you OK, Nick?" That was the voice of my dad. "Yes, I'm fine. Just get me up." He helped me to stand and I heard him tell Francis to get ready. I didn't see Francis jump but I knew from the reaction of the crowd, it was not good. "Come on, son. Let's get you back to the lockers." I had hurt my ankle during the jump. I could feel that and I think there were also tears on my face but for the rest it was still one big blur. I suddenly came to again, lying down in the locker room. "He's coming around again," I heard someone yell. Then I saw my dad standing near me. "How are you feeling, son?" "A little bit dizzy, I guess, but alright." "Coach, you're needed in the hall for the prize presentation." I looked at my dad. "Did we win?" "Yes, we did, and largely because of you." "Me?" "Yes, but now I have to go see the others." "Let me go with you," I said and I tried to get up. "Oh, no, young man. You stay here and lie still for a little while," said the unknown voice I'd first heard when I came to. "Just stay here, Nick. We'll be right back." "OK." I stayed and, apparatus by apparatus, I started to realise what I'd done out there and, even more, whose routine I had done. No wonder the audience was enthusiastic. The strange looks on the faces of my colleagues were now easily explained. Before I realised what was happening, the team came running into the locker room and gathered around me. "How are you, Nick?" David asked. "Getting better. I think I can stand up again." "OK, that's great. Let's get him, guys." Before I knew it, I'd been grabbed by the other five. They picked me up and started to walk back to the hall. I heard my dad's voice talking to the audience and a big round of applause started as we entered the hall. I was taken up to the platform where the floor exercises had been held, where the podium was now set up, before the other guys set me down on my feet. "Well, let's hear a round of applause for the six who make up this year's city champions." I heard some guys yelling their support, and the audience started to applaud again. We bowed in each direction before we went off. "OK, now then, I want to ask the individual winners of each of the apparatus to come forward and receive their trophy." He started to call out names and I waited, expecting to hear David's name mentioned early on. And indeed his name was announced for his victory on the rings and he walked up to the podium. Then I heard Francis's name and he walked up to the podium, proud, with a huge smile on his face, looking towards me and smiling. He had won the competition on the parallel bars. Then nobody came forward when he announced the winner on the floor exercises and I looked around to see who would come forward. I didn't remember the name the man said and I saw both Francis and David looking extremely excited towards me. Then the man said the name again. Did I hear it correctly? Did he really say my name, Nick? I looked and saw both Francis and David coming towards me because I still hadn't moved. They started to lift me up and to drag me onto the podium. I still couldn't walk with my ankle, so I was glad they helped but I was still speechless over what had happened. I had won the floor exercises, that was impossible. The next minutes were a blur to me. When I look back, I am still not sure what exactly had happened that day, but it was a great day, that is certain. When we returned to our lockers, we settled down a bit and my dad came and sat beside me. "It's nothing short of incredible, what you did out there, Nick. I am so proud of you. But how did you do it? We need to talk about it all tomorrow. I'm curious to hear how you picked up all those routines." "Yes, I want to know, too. I thought I'd never be able to perform like I did." Francis came towards me and put a bucket filled with ice in front of me. "For your ankle," he said. The other team members were all in a very good mood after winning today but they seemed to avoid me, not knowing what to say and perhaps also a little bit shocked by what I'd done. Francis sat down on the other side of me and looked at me before he said, "Way to go, Nick. You really got us there." He said it a little bit louder than necessary so everyone suddenly went silent and I knew they were very interested in hearing how I had pulled it off. I looked around and saw that some of them moved closer. "I'm sorry, guys, if I surprised you with this but I'm still not sure myself what I did." "Was it because of the concentration exercises you did that you could perform those routines?" Francis asked quickly before anyone else could ask anything. "Yes, I think so. I thought I'd been concentrating on my own routines but it seems that instead I was focusing myself on some of the routines you did, guys. I'm sorry about that." "Well, it's one heck of a trick then," David said. "You know, you did the same floor exercise as me except for the mistake I made at the end." "Oh, is that why I won that one?" "Yes, Nick, can't you remember any of it?" David asked. "Almost nothing, until the last routine. Then I knew exactly what I'd been doing after my talk with,." I looked around to see where Mike was, but he was way back in the corner sitting by himself. "Mike," I finished my sentence. "So that was why you messed up the last one then?" my dad asked this time. "Yes, I think so." "Well, you'd better tell us at the next practice how you do that, because I think we could all benefit from it." "Hmmm, I'm not sure, coach. Francis tried it too, but it did nothing for him." "Oh, well, we'll just have to try it and see." "I want to tell you how, but maybe you should ask Alexei next time he comes. I learned it from him." I heard several of my teammates say "Wow." Me telling them that I got it from Alexei gave it more weight, I guess, than my performance. "OK, I will but still I want you to teach the others, too. You know, guys, this gets us to the state championships without doing a qualifying round so we have four weeks to prepare ourselves for our next meet. I know we won't be favourites there, but at least it's a chance to compete at another level and enjoy ourselves because, as you must remember, that is the most important thing: enjoy performing and work on perfecting what you do." "Yes, coach," we said, as it was something we'd heard before." "OK, now to celebrate! Pizza is on me tonight at John's Pizza Place." I looked quickly at Francis and David and they also looked at me. The guys had started to cheer and were walking back to their own lockers as I tapped on my dad's shoulder. "Dad?" " Yes, son?" "We have other plans, Francis, David and me." "Oh, you won't be joining us?" "Well, we want to, but we've been invited to a benefit dinner by Alexei tonight." "Is he in town? You didn't tell me about that." "Well, he wasn't sure whether he could make it to the competition today, so I didn't say anything. I didn't want to get your hopes up or those of the others." "I think you'd better keep a rain check on that dinner, Nick. I think it's more important for the team to have dinner together and celebrate the victory together." Francis must have seen how my face dropped, because he said, "Sir, I think it's important for Nick to see Alexei. I think they agreed to talk." "Oh. I see. Well, surely they can do that the next time they meet?" "I'm sorry, dad, but it's really important for me to talk with Alexei now. I really have been looking forward to it." "Oh, dear. Do you really think this is necessary? I would imagine that the others will think this is pretty strange." "Dad," David interrupted this time. "You can tell the others that it was a surprise gift for us three because we won the individual apparatus competition." "David, that is a kind of a lame excuse. Do you think the others will buy it?" "I think they will, as long as you bring it up later tonight and not now." "OK, if this is that important to you, Nick, I'll let you go." "Thanks, dad," and I jumped into his arms. "Wow, this is really important to you, isn't it?" I just nodded and looked down to the ground. "OK, then let's get out of here. Are you going to take your car, David?" "No, dad," I interrupted this time. "Alexei said he would send a car to pick us up." "Well, you'd better get ready now." He walked away and the three of us looked at each other and started to laugh and started to change. We meet Kathy outside the gymnasium, all excited about the results, of course and together we went back home. We had almost two hours to get ready for the evening and Kathy had brought all her stuff with her so she didn't have to go back home. When we arrived at our place, we went to the kitchen and had a drink, enjoying ourselves, talking about the day so far. It had really been great and, of course, they wanted to know how I'd managed to pull all that off. "I think I've seen so many routines on TV and in competition and in watching you guys that, somehow, I was able to do it all. And the concentration exercise was something that worked pretty well for me, although I'm not sure it'll work in the future. After all, I know now what I am doing." "We just need to talk with Alexei about it and then we can sort it all out," David said. I thought that was the subject I wanted to talk about with him. "So Nick and Francis! What are you going to wear tonight?" Kathy asked. I looked at Francis and said, "I'm not sure yet. I though you could give us a hand with that." "Hmm, I must admit, I did a great job last time if you want more of my advice." "Don't do this, Kathy! You know you're good at it so go and help them." "Oh, sorry, David. You don't need my help then?" she teased. "I thought I would get it without asking, Kathy," he said with a smile on his face. "OK, you two! Let's get upstairs and see what we can do with your wardrobe." We went upstairs. First she took a look at Francis's closet. She spent some time going through his clothes and then came up with what I though was the perfect combination. On the bed she put a pair of dark blue jeans, a dark red shirt and a dark blue jacket to wear over it. It almost seemed as if the red was just a little too much but I think she was right. This was going to look perfect on him. Then we all walked into my room. She said, "I can take a look in there, of course, but I think that the best thing for you to do would be to dress the way you were for your last date with Francis. I think that would be perfect." I knew then that she was right, but I wasn't sure if I could put on the same outfit I had worn then, not with the way things were going. After this morning, things were going well so far but still, I wasn't sure this was such a good idea. "I think she's right, Nick," Francis said when he saw me thinking about it. "You looked like an angel wearing that." I just smiled at Francis and looked at Kathy. "Will you help me with my hair?" "Sure, I will, but first I have to go and help David. Otherwise, he'll wear something completely outrageous." So, during the next hour, we had our showers and made sure we were ready to go. Kathy helped me put some colour back into my hair, which had been washed out for quite some time. I knew we were ready way too early because Alexei had said he would pick us up around 6 and it was only 5.30 when we all gathered downstairs. Kathy looked at the three of us and said, "Well, I think I did a good job. I don't mind being seen with the three of you tonight." "Oh, thanks, Kathy," I said. "But I though you were going to help David, too. I've seen him look better before." David looked at Kathy and wanted to say something but, before he did, I started to laugh, the expression on his face and the way he turned towards Kathy was enough to get me started. "Oh, you try, Nick, but you need more practice to control that laugh." "I know, Kathy, but the look on his face was just too much." "Can you two stop teasing David?" "Oh, we can stop, David, but we don't know for how long," Kathy replied and in the meantime she gave him a kiss. I looked at Francis. He looked gorgeous. I could kiss him any time. Would I do it, not thinking of just kissing? I stepped beside him and I saw a surprised look on his face. When I put one hand behind his head, he came closer and we had a small but nice kiss, with no hesitation from either side this time. When we finished kissing, we kept staring into each others eyes. I heard Francis whisper, "I love you Nick, more then ever." I felt myself start to glow and it took all I had not to kiss him again. I just took his hand in mine and, like that, we waited until we were picked up. Dad came home just before 6 p.m. and looked at us. "WOW, you look pretty smart." I saw that he was pretty proud of what he saw and he said, "Wait a second, guys, I need to get my camera." He walked away to get his camera and I simply smiled at David. "We should have expected this, Nick. He is just human, like every other parent, no different." "No, I'd hoped he wouldn't want a picture, but still we just have to make him happy." "Stop it, you two. Can't you see he's proud of you?" Kathy asked. We looked at each other and started to smile. My dad came back with his camera and he posed the four of us beside the door so he could take a picture of us. It was kind of corny but nice at the same time. The doorbell rang and I knew that the car was there so I turned to the door to open it. "Were you sent by Mr. Nemov?" "Yes, I was told to pick up a party of four at this address." "That's correct. We're almost ready to go." I looked behind the chauffeur to see what car he was driving in and saw a big white limousine standing at the front of our house. "Are we going in that?" I almost shouted. "Yes, that is the car Mr. Nemov ordered." I was pushed aside by the others all wanting to see why I was so excited. There were more ohhh and wows, and even my dad came through the door to look and see what we saw. "Wow, you are going in style tonight, kids." "Yes, I think we will, at least we're sorta dressed for it." We got our coats and went to the car. The door was opened for us and we took our seats in the car. There was enough room for at least 6 or 8 of us, I think. A bar and a small TV set with a telephone were all part of the interior. We just chatted about what we could expect. The ride didn't take more then about 20 minutes when the car stopped in front of a big hotel and we were told that we could ask for Mr. Nemov at Reception. We got his room number and we went upstairs. He opened the door himself and let us in. "So, how did it go today?" was the first thing he asked. David, Francis and Kathy looked at me and I knew they wanted me to give the answer. "We won," I said. "Congratulations, guys, that is perfect." "Yea, we had a pretty good day." "So, you were happy with the way the performance went?" "Well, I think we were pretty good. David won the individual vault and Francis won the parallel bars." "Great! Then you really deserve a good evening out, guys." he said while he shook their hands. "But there is one thing he forgot to tell you, Alexei," Kathy said. I knew what was coming and I tried to look the other way. "Oh, did one of you win the overall individual title as well?" he asked, looking at Francis and David. "No, we made a few small mistakes so we missed that one. No, Nick won something, too," Francis told him with a grin on his face. "You did, Nick? Tell me, what did you win?" "Well, I won the floor routine." "What??? My god, that's incredible!!! How did you do that?" He started to hug me and looked at me with a look of appreciation. So we told him what happened and what routines I'd done. "I never thought, Nick, that one could use my concentration techniques like that. It's incredible!!! I think you found a perfect way to do your preparations. But I think it also has a lot to do with the fact that, as I've said before, you're a pretty talented guy. Otherwise, this would never have been possible." I got another big hug from him and he whispered in my ear, "Do you want to chat before we go?" "Yes, that would be nice," I replied. "I'm going to get ready now and I want to chat some more with Nick, so he's going to join me." We went to the bedroom and I told Alexei everything that had happened. He didn't say much and he didn't ask a lot. "So, Alexei, I am at my wit's end. I push him further and further away and yet, when I saw him today competing, I knew again why I fell in love with him." "I'm not sure I can tell you as much as your therapist can, Nick, but you need to give this time. You have had a hard time and telling your dad everything just made it more real than it has been before." "I see that, Alexei, but what can I do with Francis?" "Well, I think you need to stay communicating with him, tell him the things you feel, tell him whenever you have doubts." "I can try but I'm afraid he doesn't understand." "He doesn't need to understand it, Nick, as long as you tell him. Then he'll know what is bothering you. And regarding being close to him, I think you start all over again, just as if you hadn't known him before. You need to start trusting men again and, in this case. Francis." "Starting all over??? What do you mean by that?" "Well, just act as you would when you met him for the first time, hold hands, a kiss on the cheek, and so on." "Hmm, as simple as that??? Well, that could work, I guess, at least I could try it." "And tell him what and why you are doing it, so you don't have to be afraid that he wants to do more." "Thanks, Alexei. You have no idea what a relief it is to be able to talk with someone about all this." "Didn't you tell your doctor?" "Well, he is listening to what I say, but he wanted me to start at the beginning, so we are somewhere in my childhood." "Oh, well, just remember, I don't have all the answers but I'm ready to listen to you any time. Just call me, OK?" "I will. Thanks." "Now, get out of here so I can get ready. I think we have about 15 minutes before we have to leave." I went back into the other room and I saw they were all at the window, talking about the view they had from here. I walked towards Francis and I thought, what the heck, I'd better try and start here. So I went to stand beside him and I looked at him. He smiled when I took his hand in mine. "So, you had a good talk with Alexei?" he whispered in my ear. "Yes, thanks, sweetie. I'll tell you all about it when we get back home." His smile didn't disappear from his face, and that made me really happy. I looked over at David and Kathy, but they seemed to have zoned out also; they were just enjoying each other and the view over the city. When Alexei walked in, he asked, "So, are you lovebirds ready to go?" He really got our attention with that and we turned around to face him. "That was a really beautiful sight, the four of you standing there, hand in hand." "Are you jealous, Alexei?" Kathy asked. "Jealous??? Me??? Why should I be jealous of your happiness?" "Well, because we have dates for tonight and you don't, well, at least, no one else is here." "Oh, you don't have to worry about that, Kathy. We'll pick him up when we go for dinner." "Him?" Hmm!!! He seemed to have forgotten to tell us something, I thought. I looked at David who seemed to have had the same idea and we started to laugh at all of this. "Oh, didn't the guys tell you I'm bi, Kathy?" "No, somehow they seem to have forgotten to do that, but I'll make sure I'll get them back for that!" she said with a furious look at us. "I'm glad I'm not David tonight," Francis said, a little bit louder than he thought he spoke. "Oh, I'm not forgetting about you two either," Kathy said with a laugh. "I`ll make sure I get you back, too. So who is the lucky guy, Alexei?" "Wait and you'll see when we pick him up." I started to wonder if it would be James. When I looked at Francis, I realised we were thinking along the same lines and we started to laugh. "What now?" Kathy asked. "Hmm, I'd guess they just thought of who my date could be, Kathy, and that is why they started to laugh. I think it's time to leave." Before Kathy could do or say anything, Alexei started to guide us out of the room and down to the car which was still there. All the way down I made sure I had Francis's hand in mine and I saw that Alexei saw it too and he smiled approvingly at me. This was the start of an evening that was even better than the day. We drove for another 20 minutes away from the city centre. Alexei had used the car phone to tell his date that we was almost there. When we stopped, he got out of the car and walked to the door. I wasn't sure where we were but when James opened the door, I knew we'd been right about who his date was. I smiled at Francis while David and Kathy were craning their necks to see who he was picking up. They came back to the car and James sat down and was introduced by Alexei to those who didn't know him. During the ride to the restaurant, we got to know each other a little better and then we stopped at the hotel. There were some people waiting outside to see who came to dine there. I'd forgotten that there might even be press around. "Don't worry, guys," Alexei said. "No press around, only fans". We got out of the car. Some of them seemed to recognise Alexei and he stepped towards them to give them autographs. We walked into the hotel and were directed to a large room. Our coats were taken and we moved into the dining room. I looked around and saw that there were quite a number of people around. "So, where do we go now, Alexei?" "OK, you guys. You have enough time to mingle for a while and look around. I believe that the dinner should start around 8. In the meantime, you can look around and see which table we are sitting at. It should have my name on 6 place cards." I looked around and we started to walk through the crowd. We lost the sight of both Alexei and David, so we mingled, just the two of us. I had taken Francis's hand in mine as soon as we'd taken our coats off and now we were just wandering and still holding hands. We were offered a drink and we walked around a little bit. We found our table and looked to see if there were more celebrities nearby. I was also very careful looking around to make sure that no one that we knew was there. "This is nice, isn't it, Francis." "What is, Nick?" "Being together so openly, holding hands with no one looking at us." "Yes, you're right about that, Nick, and I think I've already seen more gay couples. Did you ask what kind of benefit this was?" "No, I didn't. We'll have to do that before we leave." "Wow, I think I know him!" Francis said, pointing his head discreetly in the direction of the other side of the room. "Yes, I know that face, too, but I have no idea who he is." We continued to look around and ended up at the window of the room. The dinner was on the 12th floor of the hotel, so the view was wonderful. I've no idea how long we stood there, but it was quite some time. We just enjoyed each other, holding hands. We didn't say much to each other, but I think we just enjoyed being together again. When dinner was announced, we walked towards the table we had found before. Alexei and David were already there and we were introduced to the other people at the table. Two places were still empty. Then the person I thought I'd recognised came towards the table. Who was he? I knew I'd seen his face somewhere before. Then it hit me. WOW, this was Justin from Queer as Folk. But what was his real name? Justin walked towards Alexei and greeted him. They seemed to know each other and they talked a little bit. Then he started to introduce himself to the others. I saw that none of them knew who he was. When he reached me, I still couldn't think of his real name, and I didn't get it from the other's introduction. "Randy, this is Nick, a very good friend of mine and a very good gymnast." "Ah, hi Randy," I said, relieved to know his name. "Hi Nick, pleased to meet you." "Yes, I've always wanted to meet you. I really like the way you play your character." "Oh, you know the show?" "Yes, I do, although none of the others seems to have recognised you." "So, you know what he does, Nick?" Alexei asked. "Yes, of course. I'm a big fan of the show." I saw Francis and the others watching me and then I said, a little louder than I intended, "Hi, this is Randy who plays Justin in the show Queer as Folk." "Wow, you couldn't have said that a little louder, could you, Nick?" Alexei said with a smile. "I don't mind, Alexei. I'm getting used to the fans by now and I'm sure that almost everybody here knows who I am, except for the people at your table." "Well, maybe that's because they train too hard and don't allow themselves to watch ShowTime. Although, if that is the case, I'm not sure why Nick would have recognised you, so he must have seen the program somewhere." I blushed and then turned towards Randy. "Well, I'm just glad to meet you and would love to chat with you after dinner if that is possible." "Yes, of course it is, Nick, as long as you don't get star struck at me." "No, I won't." "Then I want you to,," Alexei started but I barged in. "Let me, Alexei," I said. I saw a surprised look on Francis's face. "Randy, I just want to introduce Francis, my boyfriend, to you." And while I said that, I kissed Francis on his cheek. "Nice to meet you, Francis." "Me, too, although I'm not sure who you are. Nick at least seems to be pretty enthusiastic about what you do, so I'll be looking forward to our after-dinner chat to get to know each other." "I'm looking forward to it even more than I was a moment ago," Randy answered, looking at Nick while he said it. "OK, let's go and sit down. They'll start dinner real soon." "Are you alone here, Randy?" I asked while he sat down before anyone else could ask him anything. I saw that Randy frowned and then looked down. "Let's just say that my date decided that it was better if I came alone." "Oh, "was the only thing I said, not wanting to say more after I saw his disappointment. There was lots of interest to talk about during dinner with the 11 of us at the table. They were really nice people. Dinner took a long time and just before dessert was brought in, it was announced that it would be possible to dance in the room next door because dessert would not be ready for another 45 minutes. Francis looked at me and said, "Would you dance with me?" "I'd love to," as I smiled at him. Things were going great tonight. We stood up and saw that James and Alexei and David and Kathy were doing the same. "You don't mind if we leave you here for a while, Randy?" Alexei asked. "No, please go and enjoy yourselves." So we went to the dance floor. "Thanks for calling me your boyfriend, Nick," Francis whispered in my ear at some time while we were dancing. I just smiled at him. After we'd danced for about 15 minutes or so, he said he needed to visit the men's room. He walked away and I just went to the side of the dance floor where I found Alexei standing, talking with someone else. "So, James walked out on you, too?" I teased Alexei when I approached him. "Yea he needed to,." "I know, I think Francis just joined him." Another guy had looked at us curiously. "Don't I know you? I've seen you somewhere before," he said to me. "I have no idea who you are and I don't think we've ever met before," I answered him. "Are you a gymnast like Alexei?" "Well, I had my first competition today. I'm not sure if you could call me a real gymnast then." "Ahhh, you participated in the city competition today? That is where I saw you before." "Oh, you were there today?" "Yes, I was. My friend wanted to see it and I joined him." "Wow, Andy, I never knew you loved gymnastics. You never visited one of my competitions," Alexei said, teasing him. "Well, I'm sorry, Alexei, but our schedules never seem to fit and now that I'm injured, I've time to go out a little more often." "I know, Andy. I was just teasing you, although it would be nice to play some tennis with you soon again." "Ahhh, as long as you don't ask me to return the favour and do some gymnastic stuff. I'm sure my coach would not approve that." Then it hit me; I'd seen this guy before, only not wearing a tux. "You're Andy Roddick, aren't you?" "Yes, well, normally people recognise me a lot sooner than you did. You don't like tennis?" "Well, I do, but I haven't see you wearing something other than a tennis outfit, so I didn't recognise you in your tux. I must say that you're pretty much dominating the ranks at the moment." "Well, right now, I'm not doing much of anything with my injury. You looked quite terrific out there, too. I think you'd have ended among the top 5 if you hadn't made that mistake on the last apparatus." "That is something you didn't tell me. Were you really that good, Nick?" Alexei looked at me with surprise on his face. Before I could answer, Andy said, "Well, according to my boyfriend, he was very good, although he'd never heard of you before." I blushed a little bit. I couldn't say anything but when I looked at Alexei's face, I knew what to say. "Well, that is what you get when you are trained by the master himself." "Ahhh, it's like that, is it?" Andy said, just smiling. He got the message behind my comment. "Leave it you two," Alexei said. "So, where is that boyfriend of yours? It sounds like he knows a lot about gymnastics." "Oh, he does. He's a gymnast himself. There he is. I'll get him." Andy walked away to grab the man he'd pointed at and then returned with him. He introduced us and we chatted for a while. Then they saw someone else they knew and walked away from us, but we agreed that we'd meet for lunch tomorrow. I knew that Francis would want to meet them also. Alexei and I got ourselves a drink while we waited for Francis and James to return. They came back together some five minutes later. "Sorry it took us so long, but there was a line up in the men's room," James said while he kissed Alexei on the cheek. "No problem," I said. "I just met some great people, Francis. You know Andy Roddick?" "The hunk of a tennis player?" he asked. "Yes, that's the one. Well, it seems he was at the competition this afternoon to watch and I told him that you'd want to meet him, so I agreed we would have lunch tomorrow." "Ahhh, that's nice. More gay couples to spend time with. You're getting the hang of it, Nick." "I'm just enjoying myself, Francis, and you know I love to show you off." "Why were they at the meet this afternoon? I could imagine them having lots of things to do instead of watching a simple city competition." "His boyfriend wanted to go and watch and he just joined in." "So where is he? I want to see who the lucky guy is who got hooked up with him." I looked around to see where they'd gone and found them standing some ten metres from us. I pointed at them and said, "There they are. Andy is wearing the tux and his boyfriend is the one with the green jacket on." "Hmm, they look cute," he said. He started to walk over to them when Andy's boyfriend , forgot his name , turned around and saw us coming. At that moment Francis froze and screamed, "NO!!!" Along with everyone else in the room, I looked at him and then at Andy's boyfriend, who'd turned pale at the same moment. "Francis" he said, as he came closer to us. "No, Brian, get away," Francis whispered, but Andy's boyfriend didn't move. I saw Francis start to turn around and run out of there. I wanted to run after him but first I had to find out what was going on here. Then the name came to me: Brian, Francis had yelled. I looked one more time at them and then turned around knowing all I needed to know. <