Date: Mon, 30 Jul 2001 16:25:22 EDT
From: VitaminRforFun@aol.com
Subject: Commencement - Chapter 2

Chapter 2 --- INTUITION

	Three weeks into pledging and I was already sick of it. Pledge
master is a weird job. The people that would most appreciate it are the
kids who just got in, but no one wants to trust them. By the time you're a
second semester junior a lot of the excitement wears off. Sure, its fun the
first night you rally the pledges into the basement and scare the shit out
of 'em, that's like Christmas. But after that first session you get bored
with it. I, in particular was bored with bossing these kids around; I just
wanted them to get their letters.

	For real, this was a great pledge class. We had 12 guys ultimately
pledge, and these were 12 of the greatest kids you'd ever meet. The best
thing about them was that they bought every line we fed them. Pledges are
so much more fun when they buy everything, it means you can do so much more
to them, break them in more, and make their lives a lot more difficult for
those 8 weeks. The thing with pledging is it isn't real. Very little of it
actually matters. All we try to do is to create a situation in which the
kids learn about the house, the national fraternity, and become great
friends with each other and the other brothers. This is generally
accomplished through tests of knowledge and pitting the pledge class
against the brothers by making it an "us against them" situation. I was
definitely good at what I did, but it pressed my abilities to change the
rules on them all the time when they never fucked up.

	Andy was struggling with things for a while. He wanted to wait
until fall when lax season was over. But I would have none of that; I
wanted this kid in by the end of this year so I could have all next year to
be friends with him. By the third week he wanted to quit, but was
struggling with the decision. Jack Birch, one of the other plebes, came to
me and told me Andy wanted to quit. I almost shit myself when I heard that.

	About 12 seconds after I heard that, I got Max (Andy's big and one
of my pledge bros.) and went to his room. This was my first "intimate" talk
with the fucker. He was in his room, doing some homework. I'd already let
the word spread a little that they had the night off, so he wasn't gathered
with his pledge brothers like he normally would have. He seemed happy to
see us, but he always seemed happy.

	Max started: "Andy man, is everything cool with you?"
	Me: "Yeah kid, you can be totally honest with us right now. I
swear, nothing you say leaves this room. On my Bond man."
	Max: "Yeah, just let it out, let us know what's going on with you
so we can help."

	You could tell he was struggling, like he wanted to tell us exactly
how he felt and for us to make things better. But he also knew it wasn't
going to get easier, and his grades were going to shit, and he just wanted
pledging to end. The greatest things about these moments is that you only
need to give the guy one good reason to stay because in their heart they
want to.

	Generally you take a different approach depending. Some you
scare. You tell them that everything they had going on in their lives at
Biltmore is going to end. All the parties, the sorority girls, being
welcome in the house...all that is gone if they de-pledge. Then you explain
to them that basically they become damaged goods. There's an unspoken rule
among all the houses that you don't take another house's de-pledge. Yeah, I
guess it's pretty cruel and petty, but that's the way it has to be. From
our perspective you take a kid in because you want him to be your
brother. In the fraternity's view, that's a serious honor that you don't
just give up like some freshmen slut gives it up to you. You only pick guys
you think will add to the house or continue its stability. When one of
those guys who you decided to invest your future in decides that he isn't
willing to work hard enough to be brother it's a slap in the face to
you. From the point of the pledge master its even worse, it's like being
stabbed in the back. Pledge master's put their lives into their
classes. When the pledges get a call at 6AM to get to the house, the master
was probably up at 5:45 setting stuff up for the morning session. When a
pledge has issues with a coach, professor, parent, or girlfriend, it's the
pledge master who takes care of it. They go to bat for these kids,
defending them at meetings to brothers who are pissed at different pledges,
and generally sink their lives into the process. So for me, and for the
house in general, to scare a kid into not quitting isn't cruel or petty,
it's the risk that they take when they accept the bid.

	We didn't go that route with Andy. Those kids generally try to act
tough and are cool guys, but they mainly do it for the parties and women
and have to be taught how to be a good brother. Andy was different. He
genuinely liked the house, he liked the guys, and he wanted to be a part of
us. He was also pretty sensitive and was generally someone you wanted to
protect.

	That was the beauty of Andy. It's so hard to explain him. He's this
big jock, but his heart's made of gold. I've never seen him be mean to
anyone, unless he was joking around. I've never heard him raise his voice
or seen him raise his fists. He was strong and so confident, but at the
same time you just wanted to hug him. And deep down he loved being held,
but it took a while before I found that out...

	Andy: "This is just getting hard guys. I don't feel like I'm
fitting in here, and everything is just crashing in around me."
	Max: "Dude, Andy, everyone loves you man. Why do you think we
pushed so hard for you to pledge this semester."
	Me: "Yeah, we didn't want to wait for you. We wanted to you be a
brother as soon as possible."

	We talked for a little bit longer and when we were done Andy was
solid in his commitment to the house. I went home that night feeling good;
it felt like I'd dodged a huge bullet and my energy and excitement about
being pledge master was renewed. Lying in bed that night I replayed the
conversation we had with Andy. "I don't feel like I'm fitting in here..."
If anyone would have fit in with Beta it was Andy. He was perfect for us,
and in a lot of ways he was better than most of us. While the rest of us
were fucked up all the time or really stuck on ourselves, he wasn't. Andy
was pure.

	The third week of pledging was our last before spring break. I kind
of took it easy on the guys because my mind was elsewhere...it was in
Cancun. The week leading up to spring break has to be the longest week of
the year, and it often feels like the dreariest. It was New England in late
march, and Mother Nature didn't realize that the calendar said that it
really was spring.  We didn't get a lot of accumulation that week, but it
seemed like the skies were always gray, and it was constantly flurrying
outside. My God, I needed to get out of there.

	That Thursday night I called a session at 8, which is pretty early,
so the pledges all kind of knew something was up. Once they were all
gathered up I started asking them questions that they couldn't have
possibly known the answers to. This led to pushups, sit ups, and
wall-sits. After about an hour of screaming and yelling I decided that it
was time to get downtown with the boys. So I devised a little challenge for
them. They had to successfully answer 7 our of 10 questions. This was a
game they would not fail. Surprisingly they made their 1st 6 answers, but I
couldn't let them get 7 in a row, so I made the next three really hard. It
came down to the last one, and it was Andy's turn to answer. I don't like
to play favorites, but there was no way I was going to let him be the one
to ruin it for his class so I threw out an easy question and he nailed it.

	When Andy got it all the brothers cheered and I told them to break
down and to get ready for some drinkin tonight. We got to Hobo Joe's,
Beta's bar, and took the place over. It was tradition for us, Tri-Delt,
Delta Sig, and AOPi to have a keg race. Each house bought a keg and the
first one to tap theirs won and got to keep the sacred "Keg Cup." This was
just a great tradition for the four of us to keep relations good between
the houses, and to show our pledges what Greek life was about.

	Through the night I was kind of socializing with friends from the
other houses, making my rounds, playing some foose and cricket, and just
getting shitty. At about 12:30 I wandered by Andy and he looked like he was
having a great time. I kinda just stood there and smiled at him, oblivious
to what was going on around me. He was talking to a couple of AOPi plebes
and looked like he was getting his mack on. When we made eye contact I kind
of played off the fact that I was staring at him for about 2 minutes and
motioned for him to come over to me. Like the good pledge he was he didn't
hesitate and came right away.

	"So man, you having a good time tonight?"
	"Yeah Steve, this is awesome."
	"Good, I'm glad to hear that."

	We talked like that for a little bit and all the while I kept
focusing on different features of his face. I focused on the stubble on his
jaw and chin, the way his grin got kind of lopsided when he got nervous. I
noticed how his eyes lit up when I asked him about his life, how happy he
seemed that I took an interest in him as a person and not as a pledge. I
also noticed how he was obviously drunk, which was definitely a nice site
to see.

	"Aight man, its time for a shot."
	"Nah...I dunno Steve, I'm already pretty drunk."
	"Dude, you're just pretty drunk, you're not even close to being a
mess. Come on, letme buy you a shot kid."
	"Ugh...aight, what we getting?"
	"Hmmmm...."
	"Nothing to strong, ok Steve."
	"Haha, trust a brother." I smiled at him kind of wickedly, and he
smiled back at me. "Jenn," I called for the bartender and one, "how ya doin
babe?"
	"What do you want Steve." She gave me this look like "Cut the
shit," but deep down she loved me. They all did. Haha
	"How bout something special for me and my boy here. Hey Jenn, do
you know Andy, he's one of our pledges this semester."
	"Of course I know Andy, I answered the door when you sent your
pledges over with the flowers." This was a tradition we had with
Tri-Delt. The first Tuesday of pledging we had kind of a pledge exchange
with them. We'd send them over with flowers and they kind of got razzed by
the sisters. It was like pledging us, there was yelling and cleaning, but
it was mostly just a way to have fun, and for the boys to meet their "big
sister."
	"Oh yeah, I'm sure you KNOW him."
	"Fuck you Steve, I'm a good girl, but he is pretty cute." Now,
speaking to Andy: "Sweetie, if this prick treats you bad, you tell me and
I'll kick his ass."

	Andy and I both laughed at that and I ordered three snakebites
(Yukon and lime) and told Jenn she was doing one with us, she didn't
complain. After our shot Andy got kind of sentimental in the only way drunk
college kids can get.

	"Steve, I'm really glad you pulled me back in man."
	"Don't mention it Andy." As I said that I put my arm around his
back in a half hug.
	"No really, I know pledging is hard, and I know there are going to
be times that you have to be a dick, but I really think that we'll be
friends and I can't wait till I can wear your letters."
	I have to admit that almost teared me up a little bit. Fraternity
guys get pretty emotional when they talk about a pledge being excited to
wear letters, especially one that you can't wait to call your "brother."
	"Andy, my man, you don't know how good it is to hear you say that."

	We did a couple more shots that night, and then it was closing
time. AOPi won the Keg Cup for the second year in a row, in cause you were
wondering (besides the fact that they have 60 sisters, they could have
probably thrown down 2 in the time we finished ours. Well, not two, but
those girls could drink).

	Yeah, I was definitely right before, Andy was pure. Andy was pure,
and I was starting to fall in love....

Ok, there's chapter 2. Hope you liked it. Umm...next chapter is from Andy's
perspective, that's pretty much written. Then chapter 4 there might be some
sex, gotta see what happens to Steve in Cancun. Chapter 5, well, I think
our two heroes are going to get it on. I know exactly how its going to
happen, and its definitely a plausible way for it to happen. Hope you stick
with it till then. Thanks. Oh yeah,I wanted to ask if you guys liked the
side stuff, like the info about fraternity/college life and my explanations
for the ways things are. If you don't I understand, i can see where that
doesn't really advance anything, but it does help me to explain things that
aren't always common knowledge. Anyway, thats it. Thanks.