Date: Sun, 8 May 2005 18:40:25 +0200 (CEST) From: Marcos Rojas Subject: Discovering love 2 ******************************* Welcome to this adventure of feelings. Reading your story should bring you into a world of young men dealing with several problems including their sexuality. There will be scenes with explicit sexual content describing homosexual sex. If you are not allowed to read this, or feel uncomfortable you shouldn't read it. All characters are the product of my fantasy. Should there be someone who recognizes himself in one of the characters please mail me. It would be nice to meet my fantasies! :-) Still these characters remain just like this story or any part of it exclusively mine. Marcos *************************************************************************** Discovering love An awful accident By Marcos Rojas "The greatest love of all is happening to me, I found the greatest love of all inside of me, "The greatest love of all is easy to achieve Learning to love yourself It is the greatest love of all." Whitney Houston From chapter 1: "Whenever you need me I'm here for you..." the voice of Raul brought him back to reality. Jed couldn't hold back his tears. Raul gave him a worried look and hesitating for a few moments slowly put his hand on Jed's. Dealing with all these emotions were too much for Jed. "Oh dear Lord he also has a body..." Jed realized. He was scared and deeply ashamed. He never thought of Raul as of a human being. He just was there, eating, living, but there never has been a physical or spiritual contact between them up to that moment. Jed turned his head. Raul understood. One last strong squeeze and gone was the comforting hand. Jed wanted to beg Raul not to leave, but he couldn't move. He heard Raul silently leaving. Chapter 2 The house was still silent. Raul enjoyed the silence of this property. In his wildest fantasies he planned to spend his life there, a life he hoped not to be forced to spend alone. The evening was too beautiful not to spend on his terrace. At least till dinner. He couldn't help thinking about Jed and this new face of his he was discovering. He was just right. He had a heart and he must be a good guy too. Somebody touched his shoulders. "Ven mi hijo, tenemos que comer!" (Come my son we have to eat!) Anita said softly. "What is my favourite boy doing?" Jean asked with a smiling face. "You two must be very happy now..." Raul commented. "We ALL should be very happy mi hijo!" Anita corrected. They all left the room. "Yeah, I guess so. But still if there is only one of us feeling miserable ..." "Let's not thing about Jed now! He will eventually accept it. I won't organize my life after the wishes of a spoiled teenager. His mother did a lousy job in educating him. But I had no word to say, she was doing it all by herself." Jean commented. "Oh really?" a hurt Jed was sitting at the dining table. They could see the growing anger in his eyes. "Jed, I was just..." Jean tried to reason. "How about this interpretation: you should have stayed at home and take care of your son and wife, not FUCKING around with greedy Third-World-hookers!" Jed was almost shouting. This was really the last drop. Jean's hand rose and in a second Jed was lying on the floor recovering from the shock, massaging his face. "How dare you! You little peace of shit!" Jean touched his son's face with his shoe. "Look at you, big English noble! Lying on the floor like a homless! Well guess what pretty boy, I have news for you! You are done with commanding around and doing what you please! And don't even think about running away. There are too many security people around here to find you. And anyway, from now on you will have to beg for each and every penny you need! A spoiled one like you can't live out of his 2 000₤ . Not even here in Argentina! You are pathetic! And don't you dare doing something tomorrow! You will regret it that I promise you! Now get out of here! We want to eat! You can have something in the kitchen with Rosita if you like! You have two minutes to leave this room!" Jean said pushing his son with his feet. With that Jean left. It was Anita's turn to step closer to Jed. She first turned towards Raul. "Raul, bebe por favour dile a Rosita que vamos a comer en dos minutes, pero solo los tres." (Raul, baby, please tell Rosita, that we will be eating in two minutes. The three of us.) Raul nodded and left. Anita turned towards Jed. "Now you little spoiled piece of shit! You can't imagine how long I've been wishing for this to happen! And there is more to come! But please just go on insulting me. This way I'll just get everything I want without any effort. And let me tell you this: there is not a thing you can do to stop this wedding! Oh, and remember this: from now on I'm your worse enemy! So watch out what you're doing, I'll be right there observing you and gathering information to push you deeper into the shit you are already in!" An evil laughter followed. Jed never saw this face of Anita. She turned and left. Jed couldn't think. Fortunately his body moved like an automaton and he headed towards his room. It seemed as if the walls had eyes and all these eyes were on him. He kept on turning around to check if there was someone following him. Once in his room he closed the door and turned the key. The room was a mess, just looking the way he left it in the morning. Turning on the night light Jed crashed on his TV-couch. There were so many feelings and so many words. His father's face, full of hate and revenge, Anita's evil laughter. The words kept on coming back. He was lost. For the first time in his life he felt insecure, he felt threatened. "There must be a way, I can always find a way out. He can't do this to me. Not after he has been cheating on Mom! He has abandoned me too! How can he even be thinking on getting married! He just moved on! So my mother is just the past for him! An unpleasant past he is willing to ignore. Hell, he's not wasting time!" Still there was no solution. "What is wrong with me? Why can't I find a solution? I'm a mess. A total mess! How could he just do this to me! I curse the day I opened my heart to him!" The night wasn't silent at all. There were too many voices in the night. "Ya vengo Mama!" (I'm coming mother!) Raul's voice! And right in front of his room! Jed turned his head looking at the door. A piece of paper slid into the room. It made two or three turn than stopped. Jed stared at the little green piece of paper. "What on Earth does he want from me? Like I cared..." But he couldn't turn his head. Raul's beautiful face expressing so many feelings in the matter of a few seconds ^Ö "Hell, I can't resist it!" Jed took the little note and read: "I am so sorry for what your father did to you. I want to be there for you! I really care. Meet me at 21:00 at my car. Raul" Jed was confused. He never needed help. But yet he felt so alone now. He glanced at his watch. He still had 3 minutes. He left his room heading to the garage. Once there he found the empty parking lot. Hell, he didn't even know what car Raul drove. "I don't even know this boy! What if this is one of his mother's tricks? Maybe I should go back." That second Raul appeared. He looked around and took Jed's hand looking straight into his eyes. "Are you all right?" Jed shook his head. "Listen, I need to take care of some things. The waves of guests will keep Mom and Jean busy. They won't be looking for you. Would you like to come with me? We can talk on the way." Jed was hypnotized. He never needed to talk to anyone. Yet he found himself nodding. "Good, get in the car." Raul opened the door of a simple Chrysler. Jed got in. The boys drew off. It was that simple. Once on the road Jed took a closer look at the car. It was an old one. He used to curse and make a big deal out of getting into cabs this old as this car. Raul was driving not looking at him. The boy looked so relaxed, focusing on his driving. Jed had Raul for the second time next to him. He took a closer look at his stepbrother. He was a beautiful view. His black hair glanced in the streetlight. Jed remember the colour of Raul's lips. Looking at his profile these lips fitted just perfectly into the childish lines of this beautiful face. His half-long locks really made him look like a child. His neck was a bit longer. Not bad at all. Raul wasn't really a jock. Not having well expressed muscles he was just OK. "Just the ideal guy to cuddle with..." Jed played with the thought for a while. "And he definitely has good taste too!" He couldn't remember ever seeing Raul wearing shorts. This time was no exception. The black trousers were just perfect, and the olive shirt gave him a strange personal elegance. Jed once again remembered his mother's words: "Love WILL come to you in one or another form and you will just know. You will know at that moment, that he's the right person". It just fitted perfectly. He knew Raul was special. They stopped at a shop in the centre. "I need to buy a tie. I really hate it, but it is mother's wish..." Raul commented still not looking at Jed. "The wedding..." Jed said silently. "Would you care to come with me? I know this isn't easy for you, but your taste is so good, maybe you could help me out..." This time Raul's voice was weak. Just like a little child asking for permission he was probably expecting the worse. "Drive!" Jed said. Biting his lower lip Raul gave him a hurt look. "Drive Raul! You certainly are not buying your tie from this no-name store!" Jed said pointing to the store. Raul sighed and drove off. Jed was playing the co-pilot and for the next ten minutes he felt really good. They got into the fanciest shopping centre. Jed saw the surprise on Raul's face. Most girls greeted Jed, he was one of their best costumers, shopping was just his every-day ritual. They finally found a big variety of ties at the Boss store. "Now let me take a look at you!" Analyzing for a second Jed turned and pick out one beautiful tie. "This is the one! Just perfect! Go and take a look but it's just perfect!" Jed pushed Raul into the cabin! "No, I don't like this one." Raul tried to speak. "Why not? I mean this is THE choice! Which colour should it match?" "This one." Raul said pointing to one of the colours on the tie. "Told you so!" Let's go pay. Raul didn't move. "Now come on! What are you waiting for?" Raul just stood there not taking his eyes off of the tie. "Raul!?!" Jed stepped closer. "I can't do this." Jed barely could hear Raul. "It's just a simple tie Raul! It's not like getting married you know..." Jed smiled. But his smile quickly faded. "Look at me Raul!" "I... I can't... can't afford this..." Raul pressed his lips together and looked to the right like searching for a way out. There was a moment of silence. Jed was shocked and Raul knew that. He felt so insignificant near this rich boy. "Please, can we leave now?" Raul asked still not daring to look at Jed. "Raul, look at me!" Jed commanded. Raul looked at him. His eyes were full of tears and his face was expressing clearly his state of humiliation. Jed was deeply touched. "Give me that!" He took the tie and went to pay. Raul just followed him. Leaving the store Raul wanted to hit the exit, but Jed stopped him. "When did you exactly buy the tux you are going to wear tomorrow?" Jed asked him. "Why does it matter?" Raul's beautiful eyes were expressing the same. He felt humiliated. "It just does! Tell me!" Jed's voice was rough and he immediately saw Raul's hurting because of it. "Raul, please answer..." Jed said looking into Raul's eyes. "I don't have a tux, I just have my suit I bought three years ago. There is some adjusting to be done, but I should wear it only for a day. So it won't be necessary. Can we go now please?" "I see." Jed's face was completely new for Raul. There was concern and caring. "Come with me." Jed took Raul by his arm. In a couple of minutes the boys got to a fancy store. Jed saw the expression on Raul's face. "Just trust me on this!" "Good evening miss! I would like you to help me in finding a tuxedo for this gentleman here. Price is no aspect!" Stretching the last sentence he pushed Raul towards the changing cabins. The girl was there in the blink of an eye. "Here Raul, put this on!" Jed closed the curtains. Giving a forced smile to the girl who was obviously blushing because of Jed. "Poor girl! If she only knew..." Raul shyly opened the curtains. Jed couldn't believe his eyes. Raul was just sexy! The girl had a hard time looking at both of them. Though Raul seemed to be more interested in hearing jed's opinion than the girl's. "Good, we'll buy this one." "That will be 2 500 $ sir..." the girl reminded. "Do you take European credit cards?" Jed went to pay leaving Raul just standing there not being bale to move. By the time he was done paying Raul was standing behind him not feeling comfortable with the situation. Jed ignored that and they left the shop. It was pretty late, the stores were almost all closed, people headed towards the clubs. The two boys walked in silence. Jed glanced over to Raul with some amusement seeing how touched the boy was. Jed just threw the tux into the trunk. "What are you doing?" Raul sounded revolted. "What?" Jed asked not knowing what the problem was. "You can't do that! It was so expensive." "Raul, it's just textile!" Jed was still amused. "Not for me! It's the best thing I ever had. It will take more than a year to pay you for this. Will also have to sell the car. I also have some saved money..." Raul was thinking loud. "Raul! Hello!?! It's yours! It's a gift! Don't have to pay me back a cent!" jed said wrinkling his forehead. "No, I really can't accept this! No way! Mother will kill me!" "And I won't accept money from you! Not today, tomorrow or in a year! It's a gift!" Raul's face lit up and he suddenly hugged Jed. raul thought he hugged a tree. Jed was tensed up and didn't move. "Oh, sorry! Please excuse me!" Raul stepped back and his face was no showing concern and he blushed a bit. The moment lasted an eternity. In Jed's heart was a battle, a big one. It took a few seconds to realize what he needed to do. What he wanted to do. What he was longing to do... In one step he was in front of Raul looking straight into the boy's eyes. Raul was terrified. Jed was so quick. He wanted to say something but in the same second Jed took him into his arms, holding him strongly. Raul's first reaction was a rejection but he had no chance. Once realizing there was no threat he went with the flow. Minutes passed and Jed was still holding Raul. Raul experienced his first long hug. He also put his arms around Jed's waist. Raul could feel a sudden heat wave touching his body. Jed's strong body started radiating. "Jed!?!" Raul said softly. "Jed! Say something!" Still no answer. "Jed! Are you OK?" Raul tried to escape the hug and he finally succeeded. Jed turned away. "Jed! Please look at me!" Raul reached out and turned Jed's head. Touching Jed's face made him shiver, but he also could see Jed reacting. Those terrific blue eyes were looking at him now. Filled with tears Jed's eyes had the colour of the deepest ocean. Raul experienced the presence of a new Jed. He knew words just weren't an option. He stepped close to Jed and held him. Minutes passed and Jed just let himself be held. A cool breeze took them into a dreamland. Jed was in Heaven. "I hate to do this, but we'd better go. Mom is going to worry." Raul looked straight into Jed's eyes. The stubborn and spoiled boy just nodded. There was no talking on the way home. Like teenagers who are on the first date, both boys checked each other's reactions from the corner of their eyes. Back at the property they passed the control and got to their gate. Jed had his own remote control so he just had to push a button. He saw Raul get out of the car, go to the gate and type the security code. "He doesn't even have a remote control." Raul returned to the car and gave Jed a short smile. He was ashamed. Again. Raul stopped the engine and the boys just sat there. "So, Raul, thank you very much..." Jed started the conversation. Unbelievable! HE was the one starting a conversation. "No, I am the one who should thank you. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I wish I could do something for you..." Raul said sincerely. "Oh you did a lot for me! Thanks for spending this evening with me. And Raul, thanks for not harassing me with questions. I appreciate it a lot!" There was a short break. Jed needed a couple of seconds. "And Raul... The hug, uhm..." He turned away and Raul just knew it. "Anytime." Jed just nodded. Jed chose the back door and Raul the main entrance. There were all sorts of guests at the dining table. The house was full. After greeting Anita and Jean brought Raul into the hall. A very quiet Jed was coming down the stairs followed by Rosita. "Gracias, Rosita!" Anita turned to the girl. "We have another thing to tell you! There are too many guests in the house, so we have to use one of your rooms too. Because Rosita couldn't make it to clean Jed's room today, and there is just the usual mess, I would like to ask you Raul to spend the following two or three nights in Jed's room. He has at least three possibilities where you can sleep." Jean crossed his arms waiting for objections. Jed kept quiet. "Well Your Highness, don't you have anything to object? Would you bear to sleep in the same room with a Third-World person?" Anita pushed it a bit too far. Jed just looked at the door and answered. "No, I don't have." He didn't want to hurt Anita. He just knew that way he would hurt Raul too. "Well, well! Somebody isn't cocky anymore!" Jean added with an obvious sarcasm in his voice. Some guests arrived and Anita turned to welcome them putting on her best smile. Jean turned towards Jed: "There is some more training for you! I meant it as I said you're done with the happy life." The evil smile was still there. "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome! I would like to introduce you to my son Joshua Edouard. He is one of the accidents of my first marriage. Being from a noble English family Jed enjoys getting to know Latin-Americans. He should be your guide in the following days." Jed controlled himself. He knew it was the test! And Anita's words were clear. Anyhow he wasn't going to give her any satisfaction. But his father went further. "Please don't bother with your luggage. I'm sure Jed will help you out! Rosita! Please indicate Jed the rooms he should bring the suitcases into." The family was a loud not quite civilized bunch of people. Jed felt his anger grow. He wanted to turn around as he felt a hand touching his. It was only for a second. He looked to his left and there was Raul giving him a calm look for only one second. It was enough. Jean had an evil smile and was just waiting to humiliate his son in front of these people. Jed forced a weak smile and nodded. "I will help Jed!" Raul said. "Your place is in the dining room dear!" Anita gave her son a furious look. Jed went to the car and took the stinking suitcases. He hated it and hated himself. Rosita was clearly enjoying this situation. "Ay que rico! El macho de la casa con la valetas!" (How sweet! The tough guy of the house with the suitcases!) Of course not taking her eyes off of Jed's body. It was the ultimate humiliation. Once in the indicated room Jed looked at Rosita: "I know very well, that you speak English and that you are spying on me day and night. So let us get one thing straight. If I find out only once, that you are going on with your little spying game I kill you. With these two hands. Got that bimbo?" Jed's eyes were cold as ice and Rosita was really afraid. With that Jed left the frightened girl and took care of the other suitcases. Done with his job he entered the dining room. The sight was awful. Loud people screaming, drinking and toasting. His eyes searched for Raul. The boy was feeling uncomfortable trying though to look happy. "Oh, ladies and gentlemen! This is Joshua Edouard, Jean's little accident from his first marriage." Anita said this in a way that she got everyone's attention. She also pronounced the second part with an excusing laughter, as if speaking of an eternal shame. "The boy claims to be from an English noble family. Please treat him with patience, he's a bit vulnerable. Oh, Your Highness, unfortunately there is no chair for you. Would you go to eat in the KITCHEN?" Anita told that with an acted concern. That was too much for Jed. He turned and left. Straight into his room. Taking his keys he ran to his car. Raul noticed Jed heading out of the house so he followed him. He got there to far. Jed already pulled out. "Wait!" Was all Raul could say. "This is no life! I won't live this life! It's time to meet God, or hell, maybe the Devil!" With that he drove off leaving a frightened Raul behind. To be continued *************************************************************************** Thanks for reading! Please send me your impressions and opinions. Feeling also allowed and welcome! :-) Marcos (tulindobebito@yahoo.es)