Date: Sat, 31 Mar 2001 16:41:47 +0100 From: Ardveche Subject: Educating Alex 4 APOLOGIA ======== Okay, so I said that the last chapter might be the last one, but I'm too attached to Alex to stop now, so I'm writing another one. But at some point I really must get on and write the final part of New to this State, before someone lynches me. When we left our intrepid heroes, they had just declared their love for one another. This chapter, like the rest, picks up some time later. I'll do my best to keep the flashbacks to a minimum. Oh, and don't forget to visit the all new website: http://www.ardveche.com. DISCLAIMER ========== This is a work of fiction; any resemblance to persons living or dead is entirely coincidental. The author asserts all legal and moral rights (copyright (c) 2001 - www.ardveche.com) to this work and you may not copy it or transmit it in any way except in its entirety and with this disclaimer. This story features descriptions of sex between adult males: - if such material is prohibited in your jurisdiction, please DO NOT READ ON, - if you're under the legal age to read such material, please DO NOT READ ON, - if you don't like, or are offended by such material, please DO NOT READ ON. Now, if everyone who is still here is meant to be here or at least aware they shouldn't be, let's get on with it. All comments are welcome and gratefully received (email them to ardveche@ardveche.com). EDUCATING ALEX IV ================= I had been floating, walking on air, since the day Alex told me he loved me. Well, strictly since he said he 'thought' he loved me. But he'd said it again, more emphatically that night as we lay together in bed talking about all that had happened since we had been together. The only relationship I had ever been in which had lasted longer than this was with John, and we had never really been in love, never said it, never felt it. With Alex, though, I had known I loved him almost from the start, and to finally hear him say that he loved me too made me the happiest man in the world. He had a quality about him I can't really explain, a sweetness and decency that made not loving him utterly impossible. Still, it seemed like a dream and I was constantly expecting to wake up. By Monday Alex was feeling much better and was well enough again to get up and get dressed, and although he was still snuffling a bit he went to his classes exactly as normal. He seemed a lot more confident about it since Blair's visit, and although nothing bad had happened to him after the movie theater 'incident' I was worried that Derek would not let things rest. It seemed I was doing all the worrying for both of us. But that was very like Alex, to ignore a thing until it actually happened, which might well explain the problems with his grades. That was another thing I worried more about than he, and I was on tenterhooks until Wednesday and he returned from his meeting with Matt Rogers. "Well?" I demanded as soon as I heard him coming in the door. I closed the book I had been pretending to read and stood to face Alex as he entered the living room. I had expected him back hours earlier and had really begun to worry. But his appearance showed me where he had been, he was wearing sweatpants and a baggy sweatshirt and was a little flushed. He must have been running, which suggested he had frustrations he wanted to work off. "Fine thanks." He replied with a grin, throwing his backpack onto the chair. "You?" "Stop it, Alex. I don't want to play this game today; I just want you to tell me how the meeting went. What did he say?" "Jeez, Ryan, calm down. I'm just in the door, buddy." He walked past me toward the kitchen. "Can I get something to drink first?" "I guess." If it had gone badly, desperate though I was to know, it would only make him clam up completely if I kept pushing. "You want anything?" He asked stooping to get the orange juice from the fridge. "Only to know what Rogers said." "He said I'm screwed. That I should pack up and get the hell out of Dodge." "What?" I practically yelled. "No! There must be something we can do." "Man, you're too easy." He laughed aloud at the expression on my face. "Oh very funny. I thought I said I didn't want to play?" "Yeah, you did. But you're cute when you're all righteously indignant." He grinned and clapped me on the shoulder, taking a long pull of orange juice - straight from the bottle! This time I decided to say nothing. "And you are going to tell me what he really said, or you're going to regret it." I jabbed my fingers in his gut, making him splutter and lose some of the juice down the front of his shirt. "After a shower. I stink." "So what's new?" "Funny." He walked back past me, determinedly telling me nothing, pulling his shirt off as he went. "Wanna throw this in the laundry for me, my love?" "Put like that, how can I refuse?" I said, my voice heavy with irony, but I accepted the shirt from him anyway. "How about those pants, they look like they could use a wash too." I added with a wink. "You have a one track mind, Thomson." Alex responded, kicking off his running shoes and struggling out of his sweatpants. "Thanks, man, I won't be long, 'kay?" He asked, suddenly serious standing in front of me in just his shorts. "Take your time. Is there anything else to wash?" "Um, a T-shirt in the backpack, I guess. I think that's everything." He shrugged, a particularly eloquent gesture with his torso bare, and one that brought a surprising number of muscles into play! "It's okay, though, I'll do it." "It's okay, my master, I'll deal with it." I pressed the palms of my hands together and bowed low to him, like Genie from that old show with Larry Hagman. "Attaboy." He sauntered off to take his shower and I dealt with the laundry. He took longer than I had expected, so I phoned for Chinese while I waited and opened a bottle of wine for the two of us. I figured he might want to relax. He took his time in the bathroom, and I put a CD on while I waited, more or less patiently. Finally, Alex padded barefoot back into the living room, vigorously toweling his hair as he walked. He had jeans on now, and a T-shirt thrown over one shoulder, looking for all the world as though he was auditioning for a shampoo commercial. I turned the stereo down; Carmen was playing as I had flicked through the libretto, my mind on neither the words nor the music. "Feel better?" I asked as he pulled the shirt on and plopped down beside me. "Much. Man, I needed that." "Yes. You did." I grinned at him and he bared his teeth back at me. "So, you wanna tell me what happened today, 'my love'?" I asked turning sideways to face him. "It went really well, actually. Matt was a big help." "Matt now?" "Yup. Oh, didn't I say? I'm leaving you for him." "Get on with the story, you asshole." "Charming." Alex sidled closer on the couch and slid one bare arm round my shoulder, I allowed him to be affectionate, hoping that I'd get the story sooner if I did. "He said I was doing too badly in some classes to pass, that I should cut my losses on a couple of them this semester. Concentrate on the ones I have a chance of passing, you know?" I nodded, to show that I did indeed know. "And then?" "Well, I can take some extra classes next semester to make up the credits. Maybe a couple easier ones?" "I see." "And if I still don't have enough credit, well there's summer classes, maybe something at night? Or if it comes down to it I can maybe take an extra semester." He shrugged expressively and pursed his lips. The idea of extra courses didn't appeal to him, clearly, and it would cut into his practice time, but at least he was safe from being thrown out for the time being. "So things are not as black as you thought?" It all sounded pretty encouraging to me. "Well, there's a bit more." "Oh? What?" I was concerned again and fixed my eyes on is, but he bowed his head and wouldn't meet my gaze. When he finally spoke, his voice was very quiet. "My scholarship." He explained, or failed to explain. I was about to quiz him further when the doorbell rang, and I realized the food must have arrived. "I'll get it!" He practically bounded to his feet and half-jogged to the door. I sighed heavily and went through to the kitchen to get the chopsticks (and a fork for Alex), glasses and the bottle of wine all of which I set on the coffee table. Alex bounded back into the room with a collection of boxes, which he thrust at me and began to rummage through the pockets of a discarded coat. "What did you lose?" "Money." "Ah. My wallet's by the phone." I nodded in that direction. "S'okay. I've got it." "Whatever." I placed all the boxes on the table as he yanked a crumpled wad of bills from his coat pocket with a triumphant grin. "My hero." "I know." And he trotted off to pay the guy, who was still standing by the door. I had a feeling we'd be getting no more of the story until after we ate. I had played this game with Alex often enough to know that no amount of quizzing would make him talk if he wasn't ready to do so. When he returned he flopped down into the chair again and began opening boxes and sniffing the contents suspiciously. Alex was a relative newcomer to Chinese food, and was still cautious around it. He'd attempted chopsticks once, but had made a real mess of things with them, giving up and switching to a fork before he died of starvation. "Smells good." "Glad you approve." I think something in my tone must have alerted him to the fact that I was still waiting for the rest of the story. He offered me a wide, toothy smile and a wink. "After we eat, okay?" "Okay. But don't put me off again, or I will have to hurt you. Understand?" To his great credit, Alex didn't spit any food on me as he laughed at that suggestion. "Deal." We ate pretty much in silence after that, breaking it only occasionally to ask one another to pass the soy sauce, or a particular dish, or to pour more wine. It wasn't an awkward silence though; we were just both thinking our own thoughts. After a really enjoyable meal, Alex made the coffee while I washed the wine glasses and we returned to the living room for a comfortable seat. "So?" I said, drawing out the vowel sound and fixing him with a stare. "So. It may not come to anything, but with my GPA being so low they might cancel my scholarship." He shrugged. "I'd get to stay on the team, but I'd have to find the money from somewhere else. And I can't afford to stay without the scholarship. Well, I can, if I get a job, but then I won't have time to practice." "That's bad." I didn't know what to say, I had no solution to offer. "Yup." "What's the solution?" "I don't know. Matt said he'd write to the trustees for me and ask them to be flexible. I'll speak to the Coach too and see if he'll do the same." Another shrug. "All I can do is wait and see." "Well, you know that if I can do anything at all, help you study, whatever. I'll do it." I put my hand on his knee and he covered it with his own. "Or, you know, if you just need to vent, or want a shoulder to cry on, I'm here for you." "I know. Thanks, Ryan. That means a lot to me." He leaned towards me and we kissed one another lightly on the lips, as he sat back he fixed his big, brown eyes on mine and with his free hand brushed my hair aside. "I really do love you." "I love you, too." I kissed him again and slid a little closer, letting him put an arm round my shoulder again and wriggling slightly to make myself more comfortable against him. "So. Let's change the subject, okay?" "Sure. Did you have a good run?" "Yeah. Great, got down to the river and back more than a minute faster than usual." "Good for you." It didn't surprise me; he was in peak condition, his body trimmer and more solid than ever before. When he swam or ran, he was pure poetry. It didn't seem to matter in the least which element it was, he cut through either with equal ease and grace. I've told you before how much I enjoyed watching him compete, and it was true. "Yup. Needed to blow off some steam." "I bet. You want another of my world famous back rubs?" "Oh, yeah! That'd be great." He grinned an evil little grin. "How about more than just my back, though?" "Well..." I pretended reluctance. "I might need to be persuaded." "I think I can manage that." And he pulled me towards him, wrapping his powerful arms around me and drawing me into a deep, delicious kiss. I allowed myself a small groan of pleasure as I wound my fingers into his dirty-blond hair. This form of 'persuasion' I was confident I could 'resist' for a good long time. But I would give in eventually! We twined around each other, clutching one another's bodies. Alex pushed me gently back into the corner formed by the back and arm and we settled into a series of long, slow kisses. "Okay! More than your back." I was finally able to gasp as he let me up for air and he gave a low chuckle, kissing the tip of my nose. "Cool." "Help me move the coffee table?" "Okay." Together we moved it to one side clearing a large area of the floor, more than big enough for him to stretch out full length. "Get some towels, sexy." I slapped his butt lightly. "Oh, and get the massage oil, it's in the cabinet." "Okay." He obediently trotted off to the bathroom while I got a bowl of ice water from the kitchen. "Ta da!" He returned with a big dopey grin on his face, the one he always wore when he was happy, when he was getting his own way! I smiled back at him and began to take off my shirt. "Here." He said, dropping the towels on the sofa and reaching for the buttons of my shirt. "Let me." "You'll get no argument from me!" "Good!" And he ensured that he wouldn't by kissing me again. His dexterous fingers swiftly undid the buttons on my shirt and slid it down off my shoulders. I shuddered as his fingers found my nipples and his tongue and lips made a slow, delicate journey along my jaw and down my neck to my collarbone. As he tweaked gently, my hands came up and grasped his smooth, strong biceps tightly, another soft gasp escaping my lips. "Like that, huh?" He asked quietly, his hands drifting round to my back and drawing me still closer, pressing my crotch against his. I knew I wasn't the only one who was thoroughly enjoying this. We held that position for a while longer, kissing and stroking until he drew away, I moved my head forward to catch him, my eyes snapping open, but was disappointed as he held me still and moved out of reach. With a wink, he pulled the T-shirt up over his head and tossed it aside. I reached for the buttons of his jeans and quickly had them down round his ankles, Alex leant on my shoulder to step out of them and I stayed on my haunches for a moment looking up at his incredible beauty. He looked down at me with a grin and slid his shorts down, kicking them to one side. He was now completely naked as he lowered himself to the floor and sat on the towels, his long legs stretched out in front of him, leaning back on both hands. "So..." He said, perfectly comfortable sitting there naked, grinning at me. "On your face, Hayes." I instructed, laughing at his expression, though I was maybe just a little reluctant, as I was enjoying the view. He rolled over and stretched out flat on his front, crossing his arms in front of him and resting his head on one side. Now, that wasn't such a bad view either! "I'm all yours." He murmured. "I know. Now this may be a little cold." I said, but only as I poured the oil onto his back, so it wasn't much of a warning really. He drew his breath in sharply, and all the muscles in his back tightened. I quickly shucked my own pants and sat astride his legs and began to work the oil across his back and shoulders, feeling him relax. He sighed deeply and I felt a little thrill run down my own spine. "Mmm." "Quite." I concentrated on the job, moving further down as I worked yet more oil (warmed by my hands this time!) over his lower back, skipping his butt and on down his thighs, drawing my hands slowly and sensually along his muscular legs. He moved his legs apart slightly as I swung off him and sat to one side, I was now very aroused myself and totally turned on by the passivity of him lying there exposed to me. "Mmm, you're so good, Ry." He muttered, at least I think he did, but his voice was so faint and muffled by his arm I couldn't be sure. "The best, lover." I leaned over him and kissed the back of his neck and his shoulders, my hands making another long, slow journey down his back to his firm buttocks. After a few minutes of gentle massage, I startled him from his stupor by landing a sharp slap on his cheek. "Ow!" He raised his head and tried to peer over his shoulder. "Roll over, you're done." "You're the boss." "Remember that." I sat back and waited as with a fluid, cat-like motion he twisted his body. Lying on his back, he twined his fingers together and put both hands behind his head. Not only did that make every muscle on his torso stand out better than ever it raised his head enough for him to be able to watch as my hands began their motion across his chest. He smiled gently and closed his eyes, trusting me completely and I shivered. I made him give me one arm at a time, pulling them from behind his head, and dragged my fingers back and forth along his muscles, enjoying the solidity and the smoothness, the strength of his beautiful, sensual, sensitive hands. When I was done with his hands and arms, I traced my fingers along his chest again, restoring the hardness to his nipples and making him squirm a little. I leaned forward and kissed his lips, his chin and on down his sternum, turning first left and then right to swirl my tongue around his nipples and bite them slightly, pulling them up and away from his chest. He giggled as I released him and ran my fingers down his rib cage with little spidery movements. "Ry." He gasped, his hands swung out from behind his head with lightening speed, catching both wrists tightly. His eyes were sparkling when I looked up into their brown depths. "What?" I inquired, all innocence. "You know what." I smiled at him and he released my wrists, allowing me to move away, again skirting round his crotch, to run my hands down the front of his legs, smoothing oil over their hairless perfection. There could be no mistaking his enjoyment. I sat down, my own legs stretched out before me, his feet between them; I took one of them in my hands and began to knead at the soles. For someone who could be so ticklish elsewhere, his feet were surprisingly lacking in sensitivity. When I finished working on his feet, I crawled back up the length of his body and kissed him on the lips. "I'm finished." I whispered. "What?" His eyes flew open again; a look of puzzlement and confusion clouded his beautiful features. "What about..." He trailed off and nodded towards his groin. "Huh?" I pretended not to understand him. "I mean, are you going to leave me like this?" There was a tiny hint of frustration in his voice, as he pushed himself into a sitting position. "Like what?" But I could no longer keep a straight face, the way he was looking at me, and I burst out laughing. Realization dawned that I had been teasing him and a look of understanding spread across his face. I was laughing so much there was no way I could even have tried to stop him as he pounced, flicking me effortlessly onto my back and pinning my arms above my head with one hand. He was sitting astride me now, so I had no chance of escape as he squirted a line of ice-cold oil across my chest. I squealed and squirmed as he proceeded to dig his fingers into my ribs, yanking my hands free as I did. The two of us rolled around on the floor, he still had the bottle of oil in one hand and it went everywhere as we struggled and wrestled. The precaution of spreading towels out was utterly in vain, but who cared? Inevitably, Alex gained the upper hand, pinning me again he yanked the waistband of my shorts away and squirted most of the bottle of oil into them. I howled as the cold hit my balls and instinctively tried to curl into a little ball, but he kept me lying flat, and soon took my mind off the cold by sliding his very, wonderfully, gloriously warm hand down there as well. I was soon naked too. "And you think I have wonderful hands?" I laughed into his shoulder as he stroked back and forth, drawing his fingers the whole length of my shaft, such that it was almost painful when he reached the crown. "I learned from a master." He replied quietly with a chuckle. "Yeah, a masturbator!" "That was not funny." He gave a little squeeze after 'that' and 'not' as though to punctuate his words, making me try to bring my knees together again, but he soon made me think better of stopping him. We rolled together again and I trailed my fingers down his belly and took him gently in my hand. After that, we didn't last much longer, all attempts at conversation ceased to be replaced by quiet gasps and moans as our two oil covered bodies twisted around one another. With one more moan, and a strangled sound that might have been his name, I was pushed over the top and Alex soon followed. We lay together on our backs, in an untidy, oily heap, holding hands and breathing heavily. "Well, that was fun." He finally said. "Yup." I squeezed his hand tightly. "I hope you know, you're cleaning this mess up." "Okay." "What?" I sat up and looked at him quizzically. "I said 'okay', I'll clean up. But I need another shower first, join me?" "Damn right, try to stop me." "Nah. Don't think I'll bother. C'mon then." I was yanked to my feet sharply, kissed deeply and swung up into Alex's arms as he carried me through to the bathroom singing (appallingly!) 'I will always looooooooove you' as he walked. I threw my arms round his neck and kissed him repeatedly between peals of laughter as he kicked open the bathroom door. We took a long, slow shower, savoring the refreshing feel of the water cascading down over us and just kissing. It was wonderful, and when we collapsed on the bed much later I was tired, damp and happy. The problems and difficulties of the day were largely forgotten as Alex snuggled against me and, whispering in my ear how much he loved me, we fell asleep. The following day I was woken by the telephone's strident, insistent ring. Alex was still cradling me against his chest, and I was reluctant to get up and answer it. Eventually, I heaved myself upright, Alex's arm sliding off me (he can sleep through anything) and wandered unsteadily to get the phone, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. "Hello?" I croaked. "Ryan?" "Megan?" "Hi, did I wake you?" "Yes." "Too bad, it's late already." It was my younger sister calling from home. "Where you are, it is." I sighed. "So, anyway, I'm coming to visit." "Oh, you are, are you? When?" "I'll be there Friday night." "Friday? That's tomorrow!" That was absolutely typical of my sister, to give me so little notice. The last time she had visited, the call had come from the bus station, instructing me to come get her. "Well, duh!" She gave me her finest 'teenager talking to an adult' voice. "Is that going to be a huge problem?" "No. No. I guess not." "You can be so welcoming." She tried to sound hurt, but it wasn't working. "I'm sorry, Megan, darling. It's so good of you to visit me, please forgive me." I really camped it up and was rewarded with a piercing shriek of laughter down the phone, which I had to hold away from my ear until she stopped. "You are so gay!" She chided. "Yup." "And anyway, I'm not really visiting you, I just need to get out of here for a while. The parental units are acting up, and Daryl dumped me." "Men can be such bastards." I sympathized. "I have the best brother!" She laughed. "You know exactly what to say. If you weren't my brother, and gay and, you know, so old, I'd definitely think about dating you." Not much of a compliment, but you get what you pay for. "Listen, Meg, I'm standing here naked, so I gotta go put some clothes on and get breakfast before class." There was another bray of laughter. "Call me and let me know when you're getting in, 'kay?" "Okay. Go dress, big brother, the thought of you naked is making me nauseous." "Thanks." "Bye bye!" "Bye, Meg. See you Friday." I hung up the phone and wandered back through to the bedroom. Alex was awake and lying on his back with his head propped on a pile of pillows. "Ooh, breakfast!" He laughed as I walked into the room. "Ha ha." I slid back under the covers and ran a finger down his chest, tracing the line of his sternum and making him giggle as my fingertip dipped into and back out of his bellybutton, continuing along the little trail of hair, but stopping just short of my target. "Who was on the phone?" He asked raising my hand to his lips and kissing the tips of my fingers. "My sister." "Ah." He kissed his way along my forearm to my elbow. "Remember I told you she was pretty impulsive?" "Mm?" He was now kissing upwards to my shoulder. "She's coming to visit." "Oh?" He kissed my neck, my ear, my jaw and finally my lips. "Yeah, gets here tomorrow. I don't know how long she'll stay for, probably only a few days." "She's not staying for your birthday?" I was turning twenty-two in eight days, but this was the first time Alex had mentioned it since, months earlier, we had told each other when our respective birthdays were. I was instantly suspicious, he was definitely plotting something, but I had no chance of finding out what, so I let it go. "Nah, that's not why she's coming, she split up with her boyfriend and my parents are hassling her. Probably about school." "Cool. I've sort of been looking forward to meeting her." He sat back to look at me and smiled. "Really? You won't be weirded out having her in the house?" I took his hands and looked intently at him. He could be funny at times about anything public, though he had taken me aback a few times recently, I couldn't stop myself from wondering how he would cope in a twenty-four hour a day situation with someone in the house. Whether he would find himself hopelessly constrained and made to feel awkward in his home. "Nope. I'll be fine." "Thanks, Alex." "I thought we talked about not thanking each other the whole time?" He smiled at me and slid off the bed, padding towards the wardrobes to choose something to wear, continuing to talk to me over his shoulder. "And anyway, I can always sleep on the couch." "You better not even think about it!" I joined him, sliding an arm around his waist. "What do you think, this one, or this?" He pulled the sleeves of two shirts out the wardrobe door for me to look at. "The blue one." "Yeah?" He shrugged and pulled the whole shirt out, wandering away to shower and leaving me to select my own outfit for the day ahead. After a quick breakfast we walked to town together at an easy pace, parting company outside the library with a quick, almost furtive, peck on the cheek. I had a dull day of study ahead of me, finishing up a paper that was due and planned to spend most of the day in the library in an effort to get it done on time. Alex, on the other hand had a day of boring administration ahead of him as he dropped out of some classes and gave thought to what ones he was going to take instead, and when. We weren't going to meet for lunch; just head back to the apartment when we were both done. I knew I wouldn't be finished before evening, and I had a feeling Alex might go down to the gym or the pool and work off his frustrations again. As it turned out, I got home after he did and found him sprawled on the couch, his head resting on a cushion on one arm and feet up on the other arm. 'Il Trovatore' was playing and he had the libretto in one hand, the other behind his head. His T-shirt had pulled up showing an inch of boxer shorts and a further two of belly above the waistband of his jeans. He looked perfectly relaxed, his shoes on the floor, his jacket hung on the back of a chair, his backpack leaning on one of the legs of the dining table and a can of coke on the coffee table within easy reach. It almost seemed a shame to disturb him, but he reached for the remote as I came into the room. "No, leave it on." I said as I crossed the living room. "Chi del gitano, i giorni abbella!" I sang along with the gypsy men as I pointedly gathered up his jacket to hang up with my own, prompting a bark of laughter from my ever-supportive boyfriend. "La Zingarella! La Zingare-e-lla!!" I left the room, making an obscene gesture at him as I did so. "Screw you, Thomson!" He called to my back. "Promises, promises!" I tidied up the clothing strewn around our bedroom, humming along to the music as I did. He had gone to the gym, so I stuffed his discarded workout clothes in the hamper and straightened up the bathroom a little before I went to rejoin him. I leaned over the back of the couch and kissed the top of his head, savoring the smell of his recently washed hair. He tilted his head back and let me kiss his lips, which I did, then tousled his hair before coming round to take a seat. "So, did you get your classes organized?" "Yup. Mostly. Dropped the most tragic ones, and got some info about night classes." I tickled the sole of his feet through the white socks to get him to move and let me sit down, interrupting him in mid flow, and he took a second to recover his flow. "Sorry. Um, yeah, I'm thinking about taking a Spanish night class, and the music appreciation one looks cool." "Yeah?" "Yeah, it's like credits for listening to music." "There may be a bit more to it than that!" "Ha ha." He was not amused. "I know that. So I figure with the Spanish I already know, 'Beginner's Spanish' can't be too tough. Then I only need to take one extra class next semester, and assuming I pass everything I should be okay." "That's great!" I was really pleased that the disaster seemed to have been averted. "Yup, so I just have to hope it impresses the trustees." "I guess so." I squeezed his knee, to show I was on his side. "So your sister phoned while you were out." "Yeah?" I was losing my enthusiasm about this visit, I mean I really love my sister, but she can be hard work. "She'll be here around seven tomorrow." "Okay." I sighed, just as well I'd finished my paper, as Fridays were pretty busy days for me lately. "I should be able to meet her then. You'll be at practice, right?" "Yeah." There was a long pause. "So you didn't tell her about me?" His voice was very flat, impossible to gauge what he was thinking. "Sure I did." Didn't I? I must have. We didn't talk often, but I surely must have mentioned Alex at some point to her. "No. You told her you split up with John, but not about you and me." "It wasn't deliberate, I was sure I had. You know I don't speak to Megan that often, and we were only roomies to start. I guess by the time I spoke to her again we'd been together for a while, and, well, it just can't have come up." I shrugged, and offered him a weak smile. "I guess." "Don't be mad, Alex. Please." "Why shouldn't I be?" "Because you know how much I care about you, about how proud and lucky I am to have you as my boyfriend. It was an oversight." I waited for a response, but he just continued to look straight at me, his expression blank and unreadable. "You're too cute." He finally laughed, a grin spreading across his face and he yanked me into a rough hug, mussing my hair as he did so. "So you're not mad?" "That'd be kinda hypocritical, wouldn't it? I haven't told any of my family." He continued to grin like an idiot, and I scowled back at him. "So you deliberately made me feel bad, what, as a joke?" I sat up and glared at him. "Jeez, Ryan, I'm sorry, I was just fooling around." He looked crestfallen. "You're too easy, Hayes!" I grinned broadly at him, two could play at that game. "I deserved that." He laughed, realizing that I had been joking too. "Yes. You did. But really, I'm sorry I never said anything to Megan, we just don't talk all that often." I shrugged, but his grin stayed in place, accompanied by a rueful shake of his head. "Don't worry about it, Ry, I spoke to her for a while on the phone. She seems nice, but she's from the same stock as you, so that's not surprising." "You old smoothie." I snorted, and was rewarded with another tight hug and being shaken from side to side while he made growling noises against my neck. "Down boy!" I laughed, pushing him away and getting to my feet. "Are you hungry?" "Only for you!" "So I'll just make something for myself?" I turned to go to the kitchen, but was grabbed around the waist and yanked back into a sitting position, practically on his knee. "Hey! You break it, you bought it." "Okay, I think I've got a nickel." "You utter bastard." I hit him on the shoulder. "I'm worth at least a dime." "Get in that kitchen, boy, you just priced yourself out of the market." He pushed me to my feet again and slapped my butt playfully. I sighed theatrically, and if not for the fact the man could burn a boiled egg, I'd have told him to make his own damned dinner. Alex was not destined by nature to be single; he'd die of starvation if he were left to fend for himself. Assuming he didn't drown in oceans of unwashed clothes first. I went through to the kitchen and opened the door of the fridge, standing in front of it, staring in. Nothing in there appealed to me. So I rummaged in our slightly chaotic freezer and finally decided just to nuke some Bolognese sauce we had left over. That way, dinner would be ready in twenty minutes, I'd had a long day, so that sounded like a good thing to me. "Whatcha making?" A quiet voice asked from the door as, puppy-like, the smell enticed him into the kitchen. "Thought you weren't hungry." I decided to tease him a little more. "It smells good." "Is that an apology for the nickel thing, Billy?" I asked with a grin as I added a little olive oil to a pan of water. "Will you feed me if it is?" "Yeah." "Then it's an apology." He sounded humble enough, so I decided to stop teasing him. "Good, see, that wasn't so hard, was it?" "Yeah, you gotta be worth a quarter." He put his hands on my waist and kissed my left earlobe. "But to me, you're priceless." "Okay, handsome, you get to eat. We're having last week's left over Bolognese sauce with penne pasta. That okay for you?" "Everything you make is always delicious, sexy one." He murmured huskily in my ear, his hands had never left my waist, and I was tingling all over from the lightness of his touch. "You always say the right thing, don't you? You charmer." I turned in his arms, letting the pasta boil unsupervised, and kissed him full on the lips preventing him from speaking. But he managed to answer anyway, just not with words. Eventually, though, the angry hiss of water splashing over and boiling instantly made me turn back to the cooking. "Make yourself useful, get some plates, will you?" "Yes, sir!" He released me, gave me a mock salute and a dopey grin and spun on one foot to do as instructed. I watched his back as he reached up to get the plates, and admired his grace for the billionth time with a sigh. We had an enjoyable dinner; I sometimes think that Bolognese sauce tastes better after being reheated, cooked through for a second time. Maybe I'm just weird, maybe it was that we fooled around and fed one another and giggled like idiots throughout the meal. "That was good." I sighed, stretching full length on the couch and wriggling my toes contentedly. Alex had washed the plates and come back to sit on the floor beside me, his back to me, one of my arms draped around his neck, him kissing my fingers and tracing the lines of my palm with gentle, feather strokes. My other hand played gently with his hair, it was wonderfully soft and clean and silky smooth and felt great. We stayed like that watching TV for a while, just enjoying one another's closeness. Eventually, Alex cleared his throat and gave my hand a little squeeze, bringing me out of a half doze. "Can I ask you a question?" He asked hesitantly, not looking round at me, just continuing to examine my hand. "Shoot." "Earlier, did you mean what you said?" "Which thing in particular?" I asked lazily, wondering where we were going with this line of discussion. He needed a haircut, but I quite liked it this length, made it more fun to twist around my fingers. "Nothing. It's dumb." "Why do you do that? Why do you keep starting to ask questions and then stopping? What are you afraid I'm going to do?" "Nothing, it's just, I don't know." He sighed heavily; unable to find the words he wanted. "Spit it out, Hayes." "Earlier, when I said 'screw you', you know?" He trailed off, and hung his head; I could see the color rising in his neck and face. Always uncomfortable with the discussion of sex, we had steered clear of the topic of actual penetration as it made him squirm even more than usual, which was saying something! "Is that all?" I laughed. "You can be a silly creature at times, can't you?" I pulled gently on his hair, until he tipped his head back and looked up at me, he was passive enough for me to able to nod his head up and down for him and. I spoke from the corner of my mouth, like a bad ventriloquist. "Yes, I can, Ryan." "Goof." He flapped at my hand to make me let go. "So what do you want to know?" "You'd, um, you'd do that?" He was having trouble looking me in the eye. "Only with someone I really loved and trusted." I replied carefully. "You've done it before?" "Yes." "Which way? I mean, you know, um giving or um..." He trailed off completely, his hesitancy was amusing me, as this was a subject I was perfectly happy to discuss with him. Anal sex wasn't something I absolutely required in a relationship, but it was something I had done and found to be enjoyable. "Top or Bottom?" I supplied. "Yeah." He looked up at me, chewing his lower lip nervously. "Both." "And you liked it?" "It can be a very enjoyable, very intimate thing." "Does it hurt?" "It can. I never found it did, but I know people who have found it really painful. You have to take it slow and easy the first time, but if it's done right it can be amazing." "Okay. So, um, which do you prefer?" "As it happens, I prefer being a bottom." "Really?" He sounded surprised. "Really." I decided it was time to stop talking around the matter and use plain language. "I like being fucked. Does that surprise you?" "I guess. A little. I mean, um, you're a pretty, well, manly guy." "Does that make me less manly?" I asked, amused by both the tone of his voice, and the implications of what he was saying. "No. I guess not." He shrugged. "So is that all you wanted to ask?" "Um. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, for now." "Okay." I smiled fondly at him as he continued to gnaw on his lower lip. "Any time you want to discuss this, you know, just say. That would be a huge step, and you know, it has to be something you're comfortable with. I'll never try to get you to do anything you don't want to do." "I know that, Ryan. Thanks, I appreciate it." He smiled a small, hesitant smile at me which, when I smiled back, spread into his usual broad, radiant grin. "Let's drop it for now, 'kay?" "Sure, any time. Hey, how about some hot chocolate?" "Sounds good. Then I'm gonna take you to bed and show you just how much I appreciate this." With a grunt he pushed himself to his feet, grabbed my hand and yanked me upright too. I staggered a little, tripped over my own feet and lost my balance, falling against him. Lucky for me he was so solid or we'd both have ended up on the floor. Actually, that might not have been so bad! We went through to the bedroom and I allowed him to undress me before pushing me backwards onto the bed and stripping himself. He joined me on the bed and did an outstanding job of showing his appreciation, insisting that I should just lie back and let him do all the work. I was hardly going to protest, but I felt slightly guilty he was getting all the pleasure and I was getting none. Every time I reached for him, though, he would swat my hand away and whisper that tonight was all about me. We fell asleep in one another's arms, a warm contented tangle of limbs.