Courtesy of www.99Gay-Men.US

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All the usual stuff about you must be old enough in your jurisdiction, etc.  In other words, if you are underage, don't read this unless you have a really cool teacher who assigned it.  Otherwise, come back in a few years, when nobody will yell at you.

This is the fifteenth story in the series, The Lavender Line.

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Alex arrived at my dorm room Thursday night a lot later than I had expected him.  He declined my offer to take him out for pizza or to have one delivered to the room.  We just sat around the room and talked mostly about high school.  Since I had only been away for a couple weeks, there wasn't really any home town news that I had missed.  Besides, I talked to my brother Karl two or three times a week.

Every once in a while, conversations come to a natural pause.  We came to one of those, and Alex's face became quite serious.

"Do you mind if I tell you something kind of embarrassing?" Alex broke the silence.

"Embarrassing for you or for me?" I asked.  "Never mind; fire away."

"I've always really looked up to you," he started.  "I mean I admire you a lot, probably more than anybody else at school."

"Well, thanks, I guess, but I don't know what I've ever done that's been worth admiration," I said, feeling flattered and needing for some reason to appear to be humble.

"You've always treated everyone with respect--younger students, older students, anybody," he explained.

"I could name some girls who would disagree with you on that one," I admitted.

"I mean that you were always really cool about Karl and you always treated his friends well and stuff," he continued.

"Karl is my brother, and I love him.  Besides, he is one of the greatest guys I've ever known," I said honestly.

"Yeah, but some guys would be embarrassed to have a gay brother," Alex said.  "You never were, or if you were you sure never showed it."

"I admire Karl for knowing who he was at such a young age.  He's happy, he's thoughtful, and he's honest.  There's nothing to be embarrassed about.  I don't care who anybody wants to fuck.  Why should I?"

"I don't think most big brothers would react that way; that's all.  I'm sure mine wouldn't," he explained.

"Well, I don't really know your brother.  He was several years ahead of me.  I mean I would probably recognize him if I saw him, but that's about all," I replied.

"He actually yelled at me one time for hanging around Karl.  He said that people would think I was a faggot if I kept being friends with 'that fairy,' I mean that's what he called Karl."

"Yeah, well you see, I should be the one showing my admiration for you," I said truthfully.  "Here you are the super-jock, super-stud, super-student.  Usually those kinds of guys are the ones that are most worried what other people might think.  You were always loyal to my brother and never seemed to give a damn about anyone else."

"Actually, once we got into high school, nobody really cared what Karl was.  He's just is one of those guys that everybody likes, so it wasn't a risk for anybody to hang out with him."

"Well, you've sort of proven my point," I said, bringing that topic to a close.

It was kind of funny.  I thought we were going to be talking about how great I was, but instead we ended up talking about the attributes of my little brother.

"Can I ask you something kind of out of left field and personal?" Alex said.

"You don't have to keep asking if you can tell me something or ask a question," I said.  "Just ask."

After a long pause, Alex said, "I was just wondering if you and Karl ever, uh, you know, uh, fooled around."

Okay, I'll admit it: That was not a question that I expected from anyone, but I was even more astonished that it came from "Mr. Big Man on Campus."

"What are you thinking, man?  Karl is my brother," I said, sounding more irate than I was.  It's just that his question had startled me.

"I just know that some brothers do that, even if they're not gay, I mean," he said sheepishly.

"Did you and you brother ever fuck around?" I attacked.     

"No," he said.

"Okay, then."

"I'm sorry," he practically whispered and looked around the room to not have to look into my eyes.

We were silent for quite a while.  I could feel the tension in the room.

"It's okay," I said.  "I told you that you could ask anything.  I was just surprised, that's all.  I'm not mad."

He looked at me directly for the first time since his apology.  I could see tears welling in his eyes.

I moved to sit next to him on my absent roommate's bed, put my arm around him and squeezed his shoulder.

"Really," I said.  "It's fine.  Don't worry about it.  In fact, if we weren't brothers maybe I would have even thought about it.  He is one hot little number," I added jokingly, poking him in the ribs with my finger.

"I have," he said quietly.

"You've fooled around with Karl?" I asked more than a little surprised.

"No!  I've thought about it," he clarified.

This admission was only slightly less surprising than my original interpretation that my brother and Alex had sex.  Alex was sort of the image of pure testosterone and heterosexuality.

"Really?" I asked, even though I could see that he was being serious.

"I used to be hurt that he never made a move on me.  I actually wanted him to, but he never did," Alex confessed.

"Did you just, you know, think about it, or did you really want him to do something?"

"I really wanted him to do something," he said in a barely audible voice.

"Did you ever give him any sign that you were interested?"

"Not really," he replied.

"What does 'not really' mean?" I pressed.

"No I didn't."

"Then why would he have made a move on you.  As far as anybody can tell, you are completely straight--a real ladies man," I pointed out.

"I know," he said, sounding defeated.

"If you want somebody to do something, you have to make the first move, you know.  Take action, and stop waiting for someone else to take a risk," I said, guiltily remembering the past weekend and how I had waited for Ed to move first to signal his desires, both Friday and Saturday nights.

"You're right," he agreed, although I remained unconvinced that he would change his ingrained behavior or that I would for that matter.

Shortly afterwards, we agreed that it was time for bed.  I had a morning class, and he had his admissions appointment.

I helped Alex put clean sheets on my roommates disgusting sheets.  It would be the first time that clean sheets had touched that bed since my asshole roommate and I had moved in about two weeks before.

I had definitely turned a corner in my own self-identity as I rather openly watched Alex strip to his boxers.  I assessed his exquisitely sculpted body as he revealed each new part to my eager eyes.  I didn't begin to take off my own clothes until he was in bed and the light was off.  I definitely didn't want him to glimpse my hard-on poking out of my boxers.

It wasn't easy for me to get to sleep with such a sexy guy practically naked just a few feet away.  That gave me plenty of time to think.  While I was surprised by the revelation, I could understand why Alex might have a bit of a crush on my brother.  He was a slightly smaller version of me and of our older brother Kevin.  His smaller size just made him more adorable in the eyes of the world.

I thought, too, of how much I had changed in just the past week.  It's not that I had never had sexual fantasies about guys before, it's just that I had never been willing to accept them.  I wasn't sure if I had discovered that I was gay or that I was, in fact, bisexual.  What made me happy was that right now I didn't really care.  Just being able to admit to myself that I'm not straight was good enough.

I tried to decide if this self-discovery was something that I should share with Karl or if I should sort things out more in my own mind before I talked to him.  It was still four weeks before I would see Karl again in person, so I had plenty of time to consider the idea.  The telephone would not provide the proper platform for the conversation we would have.

You never really know that you're asleep until you wake up.  At about the darkest part of the night, I learned that I had been asleep finally.  My first clue was the feeling that I was sharing the bed with someone.  My first thought was that I must be at Ed's house and that it was his hand that was working it's way into my boxers through the obstruction of the waistband.  But if I had been in Ed's bed, I wouldn't be wearing the boxers to being with.  

Soon I had realized where I was.  I remembered that Alex was staying with me.  Even in my disoriented state, I was able to deduce that the slowly moving hand must belong to my brother's hunky friend.

Putting together those details was much easier that figuring out what I should do.  I thought through the options.  I could pretend to be asleep, but that would be a cop out, like not making any decision at all.  I could ask him nicely to go back to his own bed, but that would be like rejecting a dessert that someone had worked for hours preparing.  I could just go with the flow, see what happens and fuck this stud's brains out.  Guess which one I chose...

"Dude, what are you doing?" I asked hoarsely.

"I'm making the first move, like you told me," he said.

"I just meant you should ask my brother to a romantic movie or restaurant," I said.

"It's not really your brother that I want."

"Huh?" I mumbled starting to speak as non-fluently as I was thinking, as his hand had just reached my throbbing cock.

"I've had a thing for you since I was in sixth grade and you were in seventh," Alex asserted.

"But you fucked every worthwhile girl in the school."

"No I didn't," he said.  "I just dated them.  Why do you think that I always changed girlfriends before it got serious?"

"You mean you've never been with any girl?" I asked the star football quarterback envied by almost every guy at our high school for the female smorgasbord that was available to him.

"Not in that way," he confirmed.

"But what about my brother?" I asked, still confused about something although I was becoming less clear about what was confusing me with each stroke that he gave my cock.

"I made that stuff up because I was afraid to tell you who I really wished would make a move on me," he admitted.

"But you know I've dated lots of girls," I said.

"So did I," he emphasized as if that made his point.

"Well, I actually fucked some of them," I said.

He released my cock and moved his strong hand out of my boxers.  He rolled onto his back, and I was afraid that he was moving to the other bed.  I had over played my hand.

"That doesn't necessarily mean anything," I said.

"What the fuck does that mean?" he asked showing the frustration that had been building in him through the conversation and, perhaps, many years before.

"It means this," I began to explain, but then I changed my mind.

I rolled onto him, pinning his wrists above his head and kissed him fully on the lips.  The kiss he returned was not as practiced at Ed's kisses, but it was more urgent, more forceful and more filled with pure lust.

We ground into each other forcefully, almost violently.  Our dicks were in contact, and I noticed that our natural lubricant was coating them.  Alex started making sounds like he was reaching the point of no return.  I didn't want him to cum, yet, so I broke the kiss and rolled off of him.

Alex jumped up to his knees and brought his mouth down directly engulfing my cock.  His teeth scraped me a little, demonstrating his eagerness and obvious inexperience.

A thought hit me like the sudden appearance of a light bulb above the head of a cartoon character.

"Do you have an appointment in the admissions office, tomorrow?" I asked.

"My appointment was two months ago," he said.

"So you came here just to give this a shot?" I asked, mildly embarrassed that I was such a slow learner and had never noticed whatever signs there must have been before.

"Yeah," he laughed his answer.  "Karl told me that your roommate was going to be out of town.  I figured this was an opportunity too good to pass up."

"What does Karl know?" I asked.

"Everything.  He wished me luck."

"That little bastard," I said thinking about my plotting brother.

"Didn't Karl tell you that I was straight?" I asked.

"He told me that he had watched your eyes as you looked at other guys.  He thought his big brother might be bi.  So, are you?"

"Alex, the only thing that I really know about right now is that I'm horny...and I'm definitely not straight," I said.

"Does that mean you're in love with me?" he teased.

"I am for tonight," I replied.  We spoke no more until morning, although there were certainly other sounds we made.

By the end of the weekend we had gone through two pizzas, one Chinese delivery and some fried chicken--all delivered to the room.  We had watched two movies at the multiplex.  Ed went along to one of them.  I sat in the middle and Ed and Alex each held one of my hands.  They took turns feeding me popcorn, but that's as far as the sharing of my two lovers went.

During the rest of the time, Alex and I had managed to deposit our cum into each other's asses and mouths, making it through the rotation three times.  It was an education for us both.

As Alex was getting into his car to leave Sunday afternoon, he asked, "What about us?"

"Let's just see where things stand when you get to campus next year," I said, taking the idea from the arrangement between Ed and his military boyfriend or ex-boyfriend.

"What about when you come home for holidays?" Alex asked.

"Let's just see where things stand," I said again.

"Okay," he grinned.  "Don't wait for me."

"I won't.  And don't you wait for me," I said smiling that we were taking advantage of this chance to clarify expectations.

"Don't worry.  I've finished with the girls at school, and I only have one year left to make it through the guys," he joked.

"You slut!"  We were both laughing as he pulled away.  I went upstairs to revise my English paper, but I jacked off instead.  After all, I only had a few hours left before my loser of a roommate returned and turned on his porn.   

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