Date: Mon, 15 Oct 2001 22:17:21 EDT
From: H
Subject: "Soulful desires" - chapter 7

The story you are about to read contains explicit material one may find
offensive. It contains homosexual acts and behavior between consenting
adults. If you know you're not supposed to be here or you know this
material will upset you, please hit your back button immediately and get
out of here. The story is fictionally written with real life
experiences. Any similarities of plot, names, setting, etc. are totally
coincidental.

Chapter seven - The accident

Ryan remained quiet during most of the ride back to my apartment. The only
time he spoke was when I would ask him a question or made some silly
comment about something trivial. I didn't know if he had anything else to
say or he just preferred not to talk. Well, at least until he asked me a
question that totally caught me off guard.

"Was Eric killed because he was gay?" Ryan asked, without turning his head
towards me.

"What?" I asked, shocked.

"For two years I tried to figure out why my brother was killed." Ryan
started. "And the only reason I came up with was that some homophobic
asshole knew Eric was gay and then waited for the right moment to take his
life. That's the only logical answer that I can put together, because
everybody loved Eric, I doubt he even had any enemies."

As Ryan was talking, it gave me time to gather my emotions together. For
one, I was taken aback by his question, and then the mentioning of Eric's
name and how he was killed brought back certain feelings of sadness. I
sensed that Ryan was still angry inside, and I just hoped he didn't see me
as a partial cause to Eric's death.

"Um, Ryan, I don't think Eric was killed because he was gay." I told him
softly, as I pulled into the parking lot of my apartment complex.

"What do you know?" Ryan asked rhetorically, in a slightly irritated
voice. "Tell me, what's your reason? Why do you think he was killed?"

"Ryan, I don't know the reason why Eric was killed." I said, almost
tearfully. "I'm still trying to figure it out myself - why? I don't have
any answers."

"I just don't get it." Ryan said, shaking his head.

"Get what?" I inquired.

"Why some people are so afraid of people who are different from them." Ryan
answered. "When I first found out Eric was gay I was about 14, and during
that time I really didn't grasp the concept of being homosexual until Eric
explained it to me. Just a few weeks before Eric died, he came to Maryland
to see Mom in the hospital and we got a chance to talk. I was OK with him
being gay, but I knew enough to judge that it could be dangerous living
that lifestyle, and naturally I was afraid for him. He told me not to
worry, because he wasn't going to let anything happen to him."

Ryan went silent for a moment and then opened the car door. I knew he
wanted to cry, but he didn't want to do it in front of me. I tried to
comfort him, but I didn't know what to do or say.

"Are you going to be OK, man?" I questioned, with much concern.

"Yeah, I'm OK." He told me, and then proceeded to step out of the car. He
spun around and looked at me. "Dude, I'm so sorry for getting soft on you
like that."

"Please, don't apologize. I know you loved him greatly and sometimes it's
still hard accepting he's actually gone forever."

Hearing my own words sent a piercing feeling to my heart. I felt privileged
that Eric's brother talked so personally with me. Then again, we had
something in common. We both loved Eric and, naturally, when two people who
loved Eric were talking about him, they begin to share other feelings and
develop a sense of kinship. I helped Ryan with his luggage and showed him
where I lived. Adam was on the phone when Ryan and I entered the
apartment. He held up his index finger and then hung the phone up fifteen
seconds later. We stood motionless, as Adam approached us with a smile on
his face.

"Hey, Adam, I want you to meet Ryan. Ryan meet Adam." I said, introducing
them.

"Nice to meet you." Adam said smilingly, as he extended his hand.

"Same here." Ryan smiled, and then shook Adam's hand.

"Ryan will be staying with us for the next few weeks or so. It's just until
he can find an apartment of his own."

"Great!" Adam said, cheerfully. "Make yourself at home, and if you need
anything, just let me know and I'd be happy to help."

"Thanks, dude!" Ryan said, looking at Adam.

"No problem." Adam replied.

"OK, let's get these bags upstairs." I jumped in.

Adam gave Ryan his room to occupy. It was the easiest thing for Adam to do
as he stayed in my room anyway. His room was just like a guest bedroom,
just waiting for someone to inhabit it. Probably the only disturbance Ryan
would get from Adam would be the time when he needs to get something to
wear. Maybe we can work that out too, but it seemed senseless to remove
most of Adam's clothes to my room, when Ryan was only staying with us for a
few short weeks. Well, whenever we reach that bridge, we'd cross it. (I
might also suggest that you change that to "whenever we reach that bridge,
we'll jump off it." Just for a bit of levity)

It was still early and hunger started to set in, so we decided to go out
and get something to eat. Blimpie's was our first stop. They sold a variety
of subs and delectable snacks. Adam got the meatball 6" sub on rye
bread. Ryan got the same thing, and I got the seafood 9" (is there any
coincidence that Adam has a 6" pecker and Taylor has a 9 incher?) sub on
wheat. We sat, ate and talked a bit. I sat facing the door, so that I could
see anyone entering the restaurant. After a few minutes, I saw one of
Adam's admirers walk in. It was Toby. He spotted us almost right away and
didn't hesitate coming to our table.

"Hey, what's going on fellas?" Toby hailed, a little too jubilant for my
tastes.

"What's up, Toby." Adam responded. "What are you doing here.  Aren't you
supposed to be somewhere else?"

"Yeah, but I took the night off." Toby told Adam. "Can I sit?"

"No!" I said quickly.

Ryan looked at me a bit bemused. I was trying not to show my suspicions of
Toby in front of Ryan, but it was hard not to. Lately, Toby was getting on
my nerves. I also didn't want him to make any sexual advances toward Ryan,
especially since the boy wasn't gay. Sometimes Toby can be really candid.

"Come on, Taylor. Lighten up, will you!" Toby said, as he pulled up a chair
and sat next to Adam. "Are you still upset with me for talking with Adam at
the party?"

"You know exactly why I'm upset with you." I retorted. "Look, I'm not
getting into this with you."

"Then don't." Toby said smilingly, as he glanced and looked at Ryan. "Why
you want to give this fine young man a terrible first impression of me?"

"Guys, just cool it." Adam spoke up. "Toby, this is Ryan, Ryan meet Toby."

"Hey." Ryan hailed, with a partial smile.

"Hey yourself." Toby hailed back, with a grin.

"So, are you gay too?" Ryan asked innocently.

"Aren't you?" Toby asked, turning the question back to Ryan.

"Toby, please leave us alone." I interrupted. "We were having so much fun
until you showed up."

"Babes, why do talk to Toby this way?" Adam questioned. "What harm has he
done?"

"Adam, don't you defend Toby." I told him. "I've known Toby for a long
time, and I know him enough to know one thing.  Once his eyes are set on
something, he doesn't relent until he gets it."

"Well, Taylor, I'm sorry for you." Toby said. "You're paranoid, if you
think I'm obsessed with going after your man."

I looked at Ryan, and I could tell he was getting really uncomfortable with
our conversation. All of a sudden, he stood up...

"I'll be back." Ryan said.

"Where are you going?" I asked him.

"To the bathroom."

"Are you OK?" Adam asked, with a concern look on his face.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Ryan replied. "I'll be back."

Ryan left and I glared at Toby.

"What?" Toby asked, trying to figure out what crime he had committed.

"You know exactly what." I told him. "Ryan is not gay, Toby!"

"How the fuck am I suppose to know that?" Toby questioned. "Obviously, if
he's with you, Taylor, I'm going to assume he's gay."

"Well he isn't gay, and now you made him feel uncomfortable." I told him.

"Man, what's done is done!" Toby said.

"Sometimes you know just how to act like an ass!" I said, seriously.

"This argument between you two has to stop, man." Adam interjected. "I
don't want to come between you two.  That's the last thing I want to
do. Can you two find some common ground, so that you can become friends
again?"

"Anything's possible." Toby said, smiling. "But I'm not the one with the
problem."

"So you're saying that I have a problem?" I questioned angrily.

"OK, don't answer that Toby." Adam said, putting up his hand. "This isn't
going to work. Toby, I think you should go for right now and let Taylor
calm down a bit. I'll talk to him tonight."

"Someone better talk to him, because I'm loosing my respect for him." Toby
said, as he got up from where he sat and proceeded to leave.

I remained quiet and watched Toby walk out the door. Suddenly, I felt bad
for the way that I talked to Toby. Why do I always push people away from
me? Now I know that I couldn't consider the idea of someone else fucking
Adam.  I'd die of a broken heart. I know Toby has feelings for Adam, and I
thought that that was pretty much a normal thing, but he crossed the line
when he tried to steal Adam away from me. I'm not trying to make Toby seem
like a bad guy. He's not, but some things he does I just don't agree
with. Ryan came back from the bathroom to find only Adam and me sitting
there.

"Where's the guy?" Ryan asked instinctively.

"He left." Adam answered.

"Oh. I hope I didn't cause anything." Ryan said, looking at Taylor.

"You didn't, it's just something I have to work out between Toby and me." I
told him.

We left Blimpie's and headed home. As I looked at my watch, it read 8:11
pm. All three of us were silent as we drove back to the apartment in Adam's
car. A song was playing on the radio by Mariah Carey called, "Hero." My
goodness, I loved that song. So many thoughts began to bombard me, and I
felt like crying. I sat in the front in the passenger seat. I lay back on
the seat, and turned my head towards the window. I knew Adam stole a glance
at me from time to time, but I didn't turn my head to him. I thought about
Eric and how part of him sat in the back seat of Adam's car. I thought
about the way I treated Toby, and then I thought about Rouge. I thought
about Adam finding Rouge to be attractive and irresistible. Sometimes, I
wish I could go back and do certain things over.

About twenty minutes later, Adam pulled into the apartment complex. When we
reached inside the apartment, Ryan went upstairs to Adam's room, which was
temporarily his. I guess he figured that Adam and I needed to talk. I
wasn't feeling too well emotionally, and Adam knew this. We sat on the sofa
in the den and talked.

"I know that I messed up, Adam." I told him, as I hung my head.

"Babes, don't beat yourself up over tonight." Adam tried to console
me. "Taylor, I love you like no other person on this earth.  Why do you
feel so insecure?"

"I don't know, Adam." I said, almost tearfully. "Maybe it's because of what
I've done in my past. I never committed myself to anyone, until now. I
guess my past is catching up with me."

"Babes, what are you talking about?" Adam questioned, reaching for my
hands. "I'm not going to leave you, if that's what you're implying."

"You see, you're so sure that were going to be together forever." I told
him.

"You should be sure too." Adam said, looking intently into my eyes.

"At the beginning I was, but then I see this Rouge guy hanging around you."
I said, intentionally bringing up Rouge's name.

"OH! So that's what you're worried about." Adam said, revelatory. "Babes, I
barely know Rouge. You don't have to be jealous, because my heart already
belongs to someone else, besides, I don't even know if Rouge is gay."

"And if he was?" I inquired.

"If he was, then I don't care." Adam told me. "Babes, I love you. I want to
be with you and only you."

"You sure you don't even feel just a bit attracted towards him?" I
questioned.

"He's attractive, I'll give him that, but that's the furthest my feelings
go for him. Simply platonic."

"He likes you, I know he does."

"Well, that's his fault, isn't it?" Adam said, looking into my eyes. "Now,
let's not talk about Rouge anymore, I'm wasting too much time. I want to
spend every possible second with you."

"OK." I agreed. "But only if you tell me what you have in that bag you
bought from Spencer's."

"Well, well, well, aren't we a little impatient." Adam teased.

"Come on Adam, stop stalling." I pouted, but not seriously.

"You are spoiled rotten, you know that?" Adam said, laughingly. "I will
have to teach you a lesson."

"How are you going to punish me?" I questioned playfully.

"Get upstairs, now!" Adam commanded. "And when I get up there, I better
meet you naked!"

"Yes sir." I obeyed without hesitation.

I laughed at how Adam was commanding me around. He sounded so funny, but I
was aroused beyond measure. When I got upstairs, I tiptoed in the other
room where Ryan stayed to see how he was doing. I was surprise to see him
in bed. He lay on his stomach with a headphone over his ears. He wore a
black tight cotton boxer that complimented his bubble butt. I had a hard
time tearing my eyes away. He looked so irresistible lying in that
bed. Whoever he falls in love with, is going to be one satisfied
individual.

I proceeded to my bedroom and did as Adam commanded. I oiled my body with
some perfumed oil and lay naked on my bed waiting for my man to come to
me. Minutes later I saw Adam appear in leather costume with a mask on his
face. He looked so riveting that my cock pitched in response. He also had a
pair of handcuffs in his hands, and I began to wonder what kinky shit Adam
was into. Adam walked over to the bed and without saying a word,
aggressively placed my hands behind the bed post and handcuffed me there. I
started to protest, but he pinched me on my right nipple, and I shut up
right away.

I was amazed at Adam's actions.  Where did he learn to do this shit? I
decided to go along with it as I had no other choice. I was already
handcuffed to the bed. Adam climbed on top of me and started sucking my
nipples passionately. I squirmed and moaned uncontrollably as his warm,
succulent tongue swept slowly across my chest. He intentionally teased me
because he knew I couldn't hold him the way that I wanted to. He moved up
to my lips and lightly kissed me, letting his tongue playfully race around
my lips. I was in agony, but I was enjoying his every touch. Adam then
moved down my chest, and stopped at my crotch. First, he let his tongue
played at the tip of my hard cock, tasting the precum that expelled from
the slit.

I was torn between two extreme feelings. I was horny as hell, yet I was in
agony because I couldn't touch Adam. Suddenly, he engulfed my cock and I
grasped. I shuddered in the bed as he skillfully gave me head. Adam knew he
had me under his control and I didn't care, I was his and he was mine. Adam
reached for the lubricant and worked some into my ass.  I couldn't wait to
feel him plunge his rod deep into me. I begged for him to loose the
handcuffs, but he didn't listen to me. I wondered if he loved me
anymore. Adam put my legs on his shoulder and then guided his cock towards
the entrance of my cunt. I felt when Adam slipped slowly into me, like a
hot knife does through butter. I started to moan a little louder and I
suddenly became conscience of Ryan being in the next room. I didn't want to
disturb him, so I tried to suppress my sexual wails.

I couldn't help it though, Adam felt so damn good in me and what made it
worse, I couldn't touch him.  He had complete control. Adam began pounding
my ass like it was his last fuck on earth. He started to make noise as he
picked up speed and plunged deeper and deeper with every thrust.  I was so
mesmerized by the sound Adam made that I couldn't help myself from shooting
my seed all over myself. Adam was still pounding at my ass with all his
might until I heard a loud grunt. I felt Adam's cock expand, and then felt
his hot seed, traveling at top speed, explode deep within me.

As we lay motionless in the bed, I heard a noise that sounded like someone
was using the bathroom. I listened more attentively to make sure I was
hearing right. I heard the flushing sound of a toilet and then the sudden
rush of running water. That's when I realized that Ryan was wide-awake. I
was a little concerned about him. I wondered if he heard those noises Adam
and I was making? I guess I'll know by tomorrow how he felt. I was too
tired to check on him again tonight.

Adam took the handcuffs off my wrist and then kissed me. We barely talked
after we had fucked. Mostly because we were exhausted and sleep had enticed
us. I really loved my man and sometimes I had to pinch myself to make sure
I wasn't in a dream. Things were going so sweet for Adam and me. I prayed
every night that we would be together for a long time. Suddenly, I heard in
a distance, my neighbor's dog barking uncontrollably upstairs. The complex
where I lived allowed pets on the premises, but there was a weight
restriction. No pets over 30lbs were allowed. I barely opened my eyes and
glanced at the alarm clock. It was 2:30am.  Adam was fast asleep and lie
still in a fetal position. I just closed my eyes and went back to sleep.

I was awakened by the sunlight that beamed through the cracks of my
vertical blinds. I searched for Adam, but he wasn't next me. I heard some
commotion downstairs in the kitchen and I figured Adam was fixing
breakfast. I habitually looked at the clock - 8:22am. I groggily climbed
out of bed and staggered over to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and took
a quick shower. As I showered, I thought about Ryan, and wondered how he
slept last night. I really didn't know how Ryan really felt about me. I
wondered if he saw me as a friend, a big brother, or a partial cause to
Eric's death. Well, I guess in time I will find out what I need to know.

I dried off my beautiful body, put on a sweat pants and a tank top, and
then jogged downstairs to the kitchen feeling fresh and clean. I met Adam
in the kitchen with an apron tied around his waist. I smiled as I saw him
toss the omelet in the air, and then catch it again in the frying pan.

"Good morning my birthday boy." Adam said smilingly, as he turned and
looked at me.

"What are you doing?" I teased.

"I'm fixing you breakfast, babes." He said, turning his attention back to
the stove.

"You don't have to do that." I told him.

"Oh babes, I going to do this and more for you, so much more." He said,
sincerely. "So, how does it feel to be 24?"

"OLD!" I told him.

"You're funny." He laughed. "If you call 24 old, then I have to wonder what
the hell I'm doing with you. I won't want an OLD man tossing my salad."

Just then, Ryan came down stairs in some shorts and tennis shoes. He was
bare backed and had a towel around his neck. I tried not to gawk, but it
was a struggle. Ryan had a nice little chest with nicely formed pectorals.

"Hey young man, how'd you sleep last night?" I questioned him, as he
approached the table where I sat.

"OK I guess." Ryan responded.

"Did Adam and I disturb you in any way?" I inquired, with a concerned look
on my face.

"Nawh, it's not that." He told me. "I just need to get adjusted to my new
surroundings, that's all."

"Do you want some breakfast?" Adam offered.

"That's OK, I'll fix something when I get back from my morning run." He
told us. "Thanks anyway."

"Do you want to take my cell phone to call me in case you get lost?" I
questioned jokingly.

"Nawh!" He laughed. "I think I'm capable of remembering where I'm going."

"Good." I said, with an ending laugh. "At least I'll be relieved of my
worries."

Ryan left laughing, shaking his head as he exited the door. Ryan seemed
cool with everything, and I was happy that I was able to put a smile on his
face. He was so incredibly adorable. He felt like my little brother, and
that was, as far as I wanted my love to go for him. I finished the
breakfast that Adam had prepared for me, and then I went back upstairs to
work on the conclusion of my presentation. I felt I was ready to impress
the directors with my communication skills. I'm pretty good when it comes
to being articulate and formal. The only microscopic problem that I had was
that I tended to be shy in my introduction. But luckily for me, I always
gain confidence as I began to speak, especially when I saw my audience
giving me feedback. It didn't have to be some huge gesture, just the
nodding of their heads or the intent look in their eyes was enough for me.

Adam and I basically stayed home all day. It was more Adam's idea
though. He wanted us to spend my birthday in his arms, watching a few
Blockbuster movies. Adam went to the video store yesterday and rented two
DVDs. We sat watching "The Matrix" with Keanu Reeves. Now he was one of my
favorite actors of all time. That movie had some bad ass special effects
too. I was really enthralled watching that movie. Ryan was home too most of
the day, but he stayed upstairs. I really hope he's not bothered by the
affection that Adam and I display sometimes in front of him. Well, maybe he
wasn't, because there was a small television set in the room where he
stayed and maybe that's where he preferred to be.

I looked on my watch and it showed 5:22pm. I needed to dash out to Office
Depot and purchase some ink for my printer. My ink ran out on me earlier,
when the printer was printing copies of my presentation for each
director. I could have done it at work tomorrow, but I preferred to have
everything ready and set to go the night before. I think the store closes
at 6pm, so I told Adam I'd be right back to watch the second movie.

As I drove towards my destination, I noticed something strange was wrong
with my brakes. My brakes weren't holding as I tried to slow down. I was
already going ten miles over the speed limit, which means I was now doing
65mph. Immediately, I started to fret. I pushed and pushed that damn pedal
to the floor with all my might, but the car kept on going. I actually saw
my life flash before my eyes as I veered to the right and then to the left
to prevent hitting the cars in front of me. I wondered who the fuck
tampered with my brakes. Maybe the same person who killed Eric was now
after me. What the hell did they want? My mind was racing, my heart
throbbed uncontrollably and I broke out in cold sweat as I hit the first
car that was in front of me. I hit that car so hard, that I sent it
swerving off to the right, it hit another car then went crashing into the
guardrail. I was still trying my best not to panic, but it was useless.

I swerved to the right again, only to hit a second car. I was so scared
that it felt like I wasn't breathing at all. I tried to steer the car to
the far-left lane, so that I could pull over onto the grass to help the car
to slow down and possibly stop. As I tried my first attempt, I felt a deep
foreboding come over me. Suddenly, I felt a hard hit from the back, which
sent my car screeching ahead with increased speed. I wasn't worrying about
my BMW getting totaled.  All I thought about was my life. I tried to swerve
off to the left to avoid hitting another car, but this time when I swerved,
my car tilted on one side and then for about thirty feet, my car slammed
against the guardrail, finally tipping completely over. After that,
everything went black.

Two hours later back at Taylor's apartment...

"Are you sure he said he'd be right back?" Questioned Ryan, as he and Adam
stood in the kitchen.

"Yeah, he said he just went to get some ink." Adam said, a bit
worried. "It's probably nothing. Maybe he had to take care something
important."

"Maybe." Ryan agreed. "I'm sure he'll call soon and let you know what's
going on.

Suddenly, the phone rang and startled both of them.

"Maybe that's him calling now." Said Adam, hopefully.

Adam picked up the phone...

"Hello..."

"Can I speak with Adam, please." Came the concerned voice over the phone.

"This is he." Adam confirmed.

"Sir, I don't know how to tell you this in an easy way, but there's been a
terrible accident on 275 North street and Florence Ave. and ..."

Adam dropped the phone in disbelief. Somehow he knew Taylor was involved in
that accident. He felt like his sanity had left him and he prayed that his
lover was still alive.

"Hello?" Said Ryan, picking up the cordless phone from of the floor.

"Adam?"

"No, this is Ryan, Adam can't come to the phone right now."

"OK. I can't get into details right now, but I would like for you and Adam
to come to the hospital immediately." Said the voice.

"Can you tell us what happen?" Ryan questioned, fearfully.

"Sir, please, just make it here as fast as you can, but drive safely." Said
the voice. "I'll tell you everything when you get here."

Ryan hung the phone up, trembling. He didn't know Taylor that well, but
felt like Taylor, was someone special to him and the possibility that
Taylor may be dead, shook his emotions in ways he never thought
possible. Adam sat on the floor, dazed. Ryan managed to get Adam in the car
and then sat behind the wheel. He didn't want Adam to take the wheel in his
present state. The ride to the hospital felt like a dream to Adam. He
couldn't bring himself to believe that Taylor might be dead.

Meanwhile, back at Rouge's apartment...

"Are you sure no one saw you?" Came the stern voice over the phone.

"I'm positive." Said Rouge. "I thought Taylor would have never left home
today. But he finally did, and now he's probably in a body bag stretched
out on a table."

"I didn't want this to go this far, but they pushed me to do this."  The
voice angrily said.

"I would love to stay and chat with you, but I have a man by the name of
Adam who is in need of my comfort." Rouge said, with a grin. "I'll talk to
you after I get back from the hospital."

"Just remember what I told you." The voice angrily warned. "If I find out
that you fucked him, I will personally deal with you myself."

"Damn! I hear you, man." Rouge said, with irritation. "You sound like a
scratched record in my ear."

"Just don't cross me."

Rouge hung up and then grabbed his keys to go to the hospital. As he drove,
he smiled and praised himself for doing such a job. His plan was coming
together and there's nothing anyone can do to stop it!

To be continued...

Chapter seven ends here. I hope you've enjoyed this chapter. Stay tuned for
the coming chapters and watch Rouge's plan goes into action.