Date: Thu, 4 Jan 2007 13:50:16 -0800 (PST) From: Jo Jo Subject: The Living Years Chapter 10 "To Deserve a Bitter End" Disclaimer: The following story contains activity that would be considered of homosexual nature between consenting college students. While none of it crosses into a gratuitous nature, if such material is offensive to you or you are not of the legal age to read such material in your area, please do not. Other than that, please enjoy the story! The Living Years Chapter 10 "To Deserve a Bitter End" Shawn had kissed him. Noah had kissed him. It was like a broken record by now, but it was all that had been playing through his head since it had happened. Twice. It had been three days since his kisses with both Shawn and Noah and Trey still hadn't been able to sort it all out. He wasn't really sure how he was supposed to because they were two completely different situations with two completely different connotations. With Shawn, it was like he wanted the kiss to happen. And apparently, so had Shawn. But with Noah, it was like he was picking things up back from the summer when they first kissed. Almost like some kind of obligation because of their established relationship. But in both cases, things were now officially weird. Or at least, that was the way it seemed to Trey. The way he saw it, the both of them taking the liberty to kiss him only meant one thing: that they wanted him to pick one of them. And how could he do that? He'd really only just met them. And it had even been less time than that since he'd really even gotten to know either of them. Not that he even really knew either one of them well enough to even consider starting some kind of serious relationship with them. Which he was. Considering it. Even though all those other things were on his mind, the one thing he was sure about was that he had feelings for both of them. Deciding which one of them he had stronger feelings for was the tough part. "Need salt?" Noah asked. Trey looked over at him and nodded. "Napkin?" Shawn asked. Trey looked between the two of them before responding. "I'm good, thanks," he replied. He, Noah and Shawn were all at the cafeteria eating dinner with just about everyone else in the dorms doing the same as well, making it pretty crowded and noisy. Trey was too busy worrying that Shawn would bring up their kiss or vice versa with Noah to enjoy his dinner. He was so tense and on edge, he would have taken any help he could get. "Look, all I'm saying is that the Patriots don't stand a chance at this years Super Bowl," Shawn said, looking over his own food. "And of course you'd know right?" Noah asked, sounding unconcerned. Trey wasn't into any type of sports and only knew the names of teams that other people had mentioned around him. He didn't keep up with anything else. Still though, the thought of his house of cards crashing down on him was weighing heavily in his mind. Shawn and Noah might have both kissed him, but that hadn't changed the dynamic regarding their relationship. If anything, it had made things worse. Trey could tell they were both waiting for him to make some kind of decision regarding the both of them, and it was almost like they each knew it, thus the increased `competition' between them. The way he saw it, someone was going to be disappointed no matter who he chose. And how could he choose between them with that thought looming over his head? "I mean sports is a guy thing, you know?" Shawn spoke, like it was a fact in the bible or something. "This I know." "You think you know a lot don't you Sherman?" Noah spoke, edge evident in his tone. Shawn glared over at Noah and opened his mouth to say something before Zoey interrupted them. "I always thought the battle of the sexes involved two sexes," she spoke, standing over the three of them. "You learn something new everyday I guess." "Zoey?" Noah spoke up, sounding surprised. "What are you doing here?" "Let's see^Å.have legs, will travel," Zoey replied. Noah frowned at her. "Actually I'm having dinner with a friend," she replied. "Thought I'd stop by to say hey. So^Åhey." Noah still looked as though he couldn't get over his shock while Trey tried to think of a way to get out of his stressful dinner. "Have we met?" Shawn asked, regarding Zoey curiously. "Yeah you don't remember?" Zoey replied. "I was the girl trying not to get puked on helping Trey home that night after the party." Trey looked down. "Right," Shawn replied. "Well, anyway, I'm Shawn." "Zoey," she replied, before looking over at Trey and taking a seat next to him. "So, what's going on here?" Trey looked up and over at Noah and Shawn, who both immediately looked over at him with the same thoughtful looks they'd been giving him since kissing him. And he knew why too. They weren't going to stop until he made a decision. If that was even what he wanted to do. It wasn't like either of them had brought the kiss up to him again. Thinking about that, he realized that he didn't have to do anything. If they weren't going to talk about things, then he wasn't going to either. "The men feast before the big hunt," Shawn spoke. "That's how it's been for centuries." "Right, because in this century `the men' still do that right?" Zoey replied. "What are you, the Larry Seinfeld of the three?" "It's Jerry," Shawn clarified. "I know," Zoey replied, plainly. "Who's your friend?" Noah asked. "Maybe you guys can join us." Zoey looked over at Trey. "I don't know," she replied. "Trey could I talk to you for a sec?" "Me?" Trey asked "Him?" Noah and Shawn asked in unison. Trey looked over at them both. He could tell in their faces that they didn't want him to leave their sight. They were probably hoping for him to make his `big announcement' already. But he felt relived to get away. Only, he didn't want to let on how relieved he was. "Um, okay," he replied, neutrally as he got up and started walking with Zoey through the noisy cafeteria. "I'm playing mediator today, just so you know," Zoey started. Trey could barely hear Zoey but the one thing he did know was that she was leading him somewhere. Probably back to her table. "No they're cool, as long as you keep em on a leash," Trey joked. "Caveman number two back there would probably chew right through it," Zoey replied. "But I wasn't talking about them." Trey tried to search his brain for a legitimate way to ask her what this was all about and who she was talking about but stopped once he saw his answer. "You know, I left Shawn and Noah-" "Trey, you're in college now, and even though that doesn't quite make you a man, at least act like one," Zoey sighed as she crossed her arms standing next to him. "Hi Trey," Grace said. Trey looked bitterly over at Grace before looking away from her. "See we need six people if were gonna start our own little friendship club," Zoey said. "So you two need to make up quick. We're baking cookies and watching the Care Bears first thing." Trey and Grace glared at each other as Zoey left the two of them alone. It was taking everything Trey had in him not to storm off like some five old that had just found out the Power Rangers had been canceled. As far as he was concerned, he and Grace were past the `making up' point. She flat out believed he was a liar interested in destroying her relationship with a guy that so obviously hated him. What could there possibly have been to talk about? "Are you gonna sit down?" Grace asked. "I'll stand thanks," Trey mumbled quickly, crossing his arms. They were in a quieter part of the cafeteria where at least half the patrons weren't freshman jocks trying to get milk to squirt out of their noses like where Trey had been sitting with Noah and Shawn. So it was a bit easier for him to hear her. "Trey-" "Look, you know I was eating with someone," Trey cut Grace off. "I should probably get back to them." "So you aren't gonna even listen to what I got to say?" Grace. "Ain't even gonna attempt to hear me out and let me apologize." "I could," Trey replied. "I'd have to care first." Despite the fact that Trey was putting up as much of a fight as he could possibly muster, he couldn't deny that there was a small part inside him that wanted to know what Grace had to say to him. Spending so much of his life alone, he didn't really feel like he had it in him to alienate the few people that did want to be friends with him, even if they'd angered him. If she was any kind of friend at all to him, he could give her one more chance. He just wasn't going to make it easy for her. A chance, she deserved. An easy out, not so much. After what seemed like an eternity long staring contest between the two of them, Trey let out a slightly annoyed sigh as he took as seat across from Grace, from whom he received an approving smile. "I did a lot of thinking about how I treated you," Grace replied. "And it was wrong-" "Yep." "And I'm sorry," Grace continued after a couple seconds. Trey, for some reason found that he couldn't look Grace in the eyes as she talked to him. It was probably because he knew he was overacting over what had happened. It was just that, before she was the only person that he'd considered a friend. As a matter of fact, she was his first friend. So to disagree so quickly, he just didn't know what to do. But since their spat, he'd since befriended both his roommate and the very guy he'd now shared a kiss with twice and it all seemed so insignificant now. Yet, here he was giving Grace a hard time about it and probably making her feel worse than she already did. "I know I just met yo ass but I gotta say, I miss it," Grace said with a smile. It took a moment but Trey could feel the corners of his mouth widening as a smile spread across it. He looked up and laughed as Grace did, realizing that he he'd been stupid and was happy that Grace hadn't decided to end it when he thought that was what he wanted himself. "So, cheating on me? Really?" Grace asked. Trey sat forward, feeling a bit awkward with the shift in conversation. "Look, Grace, maybe-" "You know I'm not just gonna dump him without seeing it for my own eyes right?" Grace asked. For some reason, that statement never registered with him before when he told her, expecting her to believe him on the fly. Of course, never having any friends, he wasn't quite sure how that all was supposed to work. Now he knew. "But at least I know to keep my eyes open," Grace replied. "I don't want to believe it, but I'm not gonna completely ignore you either." Trey was happy that she was at least meeting him halfway. He did after all know what he saw. He knew he was right. Now he just needed Grace to see that. Only he wasn't sure how that was going to happen. As far as he knew, that wasn't the first time Dro had fooled around with another girl behind Grace's back, given the kind of guy that Dro seemed like to him. He seemed to be good at keeping that kind of stuff from Grace anyway. "Aww, did you two have a moment?" Zoey asked upon seeing Trey and Grace laughing, Noah and Shawn in tow. "Hey, guys," Trey spoke. "This one," Zoey started, pointing to Shawn. "Needs to get acquainted with the on campus shrink. As soon as possible." "Oh yeah," Shawn spoke, as he took a seat next to Trey. "She thinks I'm a sexist." "I don't just think that," Zoey added, taking a seat at the head of the table. "I know it for sure." "Didn't you tell me you took Psych twice?" Noah asked, deviously as he took a seat next to Grace, backwards in his chair. Zoey swatted at him to which he moved back to Grace and Trey laughing. "See, now this is cool," Shawn spoke. "The five of us hanging out like this." "We need another sista or something," Grace replied. "Or at least an Oriental." "To even out that nice number of six Zoey wants, right?" Trey asked. "Right," Zoey replied. "So who's supposed to be friendship club member number six anyway?" ******************************************************************************* "I've got it," Jesse blurted out. "You've planted a bomb in here somewhere, haven't you?" The one time Jesse decided to concentrate on some actual homework would be the one time where he found himself growing increasingly paranoid with each passing moment. It could be a fleeting minute in his restful slumber where he suddenly realizes that he isn't going to wake up because he's been put into a coma. Or it could be the night he takes a nice refreshing bubble bath that is horribly interrupted with his brutal murder of a radio being dropped into the tub. He didn't know what it would be but he at least wanted a heads up as to when it would be. He considered himself resourceful. He'd be able to figure the what out as long as he knew the when based on circumstances. But Amber wasn't being so gracious with him. Quite the contrary actually, as she was giving him the infamous female created `silent treatment'. Jesse wasn't one much for silence. So that in itself was unbearable. But the fact that his vengeful roommate who all but swore she'd find a way to off him, or the equivalent thereof, happened to be the one causing the awkwardness was even worse "For the love of God woman, answer me!" Jesse wasn't sure what did the trick, but it seemed to work as Amber turned around to give him a response. "If I wanted to kill you Jesse, you'd probably be dead already," she replied, before turning back around in her computer desk chair. That much Jesse believed as he was finding out that Amber wasn't quite the dumb blonde she appeared to be. She was actually quite cleverly resourceful and it was that combination that was having Jesse contemplating calling a shrink. Or at the very least the on-campus shrink. He needed to talk to someone about what was going on. Or what wasn't going. Or what he was sure was or wasn't going on. Or whatever else confused the hell out of him. Jesse's eyes just stared at the back of Amber's head. Locking in on the locks of perfectly combed blonde hair that smelled like roses. The hair that Amber had been so willing to let him stroke before. The hair attached to the head which was attached to the body that Amber had offered to him. The person that he'd turned down. And this was what he was getting for being so foolish. Paranoia. "Look, Amber darling, why don't we call ourselves a truce and go back to nil," Jesse suggested. To which he received no response, not that he was expecting one. He'd been slowly trying to figure out what was in store for him but he realized that while he was wasting time doing that, he could have been trying to work Amber over. After all, as much as she probably liked to think herself in charge, Jesse knew that he was easily capable of one-upping Amber if necessary. And it probably was. "Let's approach the situation from my point of view, shall we?" Jesse started. He noticed that while Amber hadn't turned around to face him, he knew that she was paying attention because she'd stopped typing. "I know that I'm an incredibly attractive gent," he continued. "Rich. Hugely famous, overseas at least. What would I do if I fell madly in love with the first female that makes my extended acquaintance?" Jesse wasn't really sure what any of his bullshit was supposed to mean. All he knew was that Amber was listening so something had to be getting through to her. "You're my roommate for Christ's sake, Amber," Jesse spoke, getting frustrated without really trying to. "It's just not supposed to happen." "Kinda like you moving in here right?" Amber asked, still facing her computer. Jesse frowned at her back for a moment before responding. "Sorry love?" Amber turned halfway around to face Jesse before replying. "Well, this is a sorority. I don't know how you do things in Tally Ho Land but here that means girls only." Jesse stared at a very serious Amber. "You aren't a tranny are you Jesse? Because if you are that doesn't count." "What? God no, look Amber-" "No you look," Amber started. Jesse noticed a shift in her posture and her overall demeanor. It was almost like a completely different person was sitting before him. A less angry one. A more somber one. "I thought maybe I was in love with you or something. But then I realized love isn't a maybe thing. You have to be sure. And you've made up my mind for me-" "Amber-" "You can't just be with me," Amber replied. "I understand that now. I'm not as stupid as everyone thinks I am." Jesse stared at a hurt looking Amber before a few moments. "Well then why are you plotting my demise? What's coming?" A smirk spread across Amber's face as she sat up, regaining her earlier composure and demeanor. "Who say's I'm doing anything like that at all?" she replied, turning around. Jesse stared at her, some what shocked with the person he thought Amber was. Ordinarily her feisty zest would turn him on. But because he was too busy worrying for his life, he knew that he had major reason to be concerned. He heard the stories. He knew what happened to guys that pissed off the women in their lives. They get set on fire. Or worse. Amber probably knew worse. Worse would befall him unless he figured out her game and stopped her. If push came to shove, he might even need some help. He just wondered where exactly he was supposed to get that. ******************************************************************************* "Shouldn't we all be at a party or something right about now?" Shawn asked. "Is this what you do?" Zoey asked. "Make this total guy comments that constantly have people rolling their eyes at you?" "Yes, because this penis I have between my legs tells me that I am in fact a guy," Shawn replied, to laughter from Grace and Trey. Trey, Shawn, Zoey, Grace and Noah had all retreated back to Trey and Shawn's room to hang out and talk for a while and had thus far been having a good enough time. It at least kept Trey away from thinking about his many thoughts. "Besides we just went to the one party," Grace spoke, leaning against Noah's chest on top of Trey's bed. "With the sand everywhere. What was his name again?" "Jesse," Noah spat out, a little annoyed that he did. "Cute but not exactly modest now is he?" Zoey said. "Girl the boy was power trippin that day on the elevators," Grace started before getting up to do an impression of Jesse. "Let's see the bloody wheels in those bloody brilliant minds spin!" Everyone cracked up at that one in a fit of laughter that lasted at least a couple of minutes as both Noah and Grace continued to make fun of Jesse. "The sad part is the guy doesn't get that no one likes him," Noah replied. "It's like he thinks he's the ruler of the universe and we're all supposed to fall at his feet and worship him or something." "That'd probably be the title of the book his publicist will wind up writing for him," Zoey said. "Right before we hear about his checking into the Betty Ford clinic for egomaniacs on E True Hollywood story." "That or his murder," Noah replied. "A guy like that^Ålots of enemies." "Oh and let me guess, you're one of em right?" Zoey asked. "Girl the boy almost got his ass beat that day," Grace replied. "Wait, you were gonna beat him up?" Trey asked. "No, he was," Grace replied, referring to Noah. "Why?" Trey asked, finding this part of their conversation highly interesting. Noah, who actually felt like he was being put on the spot, let out a sigh and shrugged. "I don't know, the guy^Åhe gets to me, you know?" Noah replied. "Jesse and Noah were roommates at orientation," Shawn replied. "They almost fought then too." Noah shot Shawn a furtive glance as he stared him down. "Kinda sounds like something a violent person would do, right Trey?" Shawn spoke, a gleam evident in his eyes. Before where the mood seemed more jovial and everyone was feeling relaxed and laid back, now the mood seemed to shift to one of tension that everyone could feel, even if they didn't quite understand what was going on. And Trey felt responsible for it all. He knew that the only reason both Shawn and Noah had been defensive with each other all night was because they each liked him and wanted a chance to be in a relationship with him. He figured they were just trying to make the other seem less worthy. He just didn't understand that part. No matter what either of them did, it wasn't like his feelings were just going to go away. And that was the part that he didn't want to sort through. "Well," Grace spoke pursing her lips and slowly shaking her head up and down awkwardly. "What's going on there?" Trey looked over at Noah and Shawn, who both seemed to forget that they were in a room with three other people besides them. One of which they were embarrassing. Zoey knew that Trey was gay and had all but figured out that he had feelings for Noah. Surely she at least could tell what was going on. "Maybe we need a subject change," Zoey spoke. The room was silent for a few more moments before Grace stood up, stretching her arms above her head. "It's late," she said. "I'm one of those welfare kids that doesn't wanna work at McDonald's the rest of my life." "Yeah," Zoey added, standing up as well. "I actually like my classes this year. The last thing I want to do is show up to art looking like I haven't heard of sleep." The fact that people were leaving seemed to be what snapped Noah and Shawn out of their little staring contest and back into reality. "Wait, you guys are leaving?" Noah asked. "You scared em off, what a surprise," Shawn said sarcastically, standing up as well. Trey was feeling slightly confused even though he knew what was going on. He knew better than to argue against it. "Come on Noah," Zoey said as she placed a hand on his shoulder trying to lead him towards the door. "You can lull me to sleep with one of your rock baby songs." "You play guitar Noah?" Grace asked. "Uh, yeah," Noah spoke, forcing himself to stop thinking about how just being around Shawn was pissing him off. "So does my boyfriend," Zoey replied. "But I keep telling him it doesn't matter if he thinks he can play it's what happens to everyone else's ears when he "plays" that matters." "A white guy that plays guitar is sexy to me," Grace said as she, Zoey and Noah made their way towards the door. "Oh, and Trey you better show up to Psych tomorrow." "Haven't I always so far?" Trey teased. "See ya people," Zoey said as she and Grace exited. Noah turned around to offer Trey one more pleading look of what he hoped was guilt. It wasn't like he was trying to make Trey feel guilty. He just wished he would at least bring up the kiss. Either that or decide whether or no it meant enough to him to pursue a relationship on. "I'll see you tomorrow?" Noah asked, hopefully. Trey looked back at Shawn who looked down at the grown with a frown before looking back at Noah. "Um^Å-" "Come on Noah!" Zoey proclaimed, grabbing his arm and pulling him away from the door as she shut it. That just left Trey and Shawn alone in their room. For some reason, the room felt empty again to Trey. Maybe it was because Noah was gone. Or maybe it was because right now, at this very moment, Shawn didn't feel like Shawn to him. At least not the one he'd been getting to know the past couple of weeks. The Shawn he was alone with now felt more like the angry Shawn that used to consider him a lonely nerd with no friends. The one that made it so uncomfortable to be around him that he hated every minute he spent in his room. Only he couldn't fault Shawn for anything this time because he knew exactly why it was happening. And it was probably going to stay that way until he made some kind of decision. "You should probably be more careful around him," Shawn said, a bit harshly as he took a seat at his computer desk. "You could get in trouble with a guy like that." Living on the safe side of the tracks all his life, getting into a little trouble with Noah didn't sound all that bad to him. Only, he had a feeling that wasn't quite what Shawn was implying. "I get it you know," Trey started, as he walked over to his closet to pick out an outfit for the next day. "What's going on between you two." "I'm just looking out for you," Shawn replied. "We're friends. I don't wanna see you get hurt." "Noah's my friend," Trey added. "I thought all three of us were friends." Shawn didn't respond to Trey's comment. Not that he was expecting him to. Trey couldn't blame Shawn for not wanting to befriend the guy who probably wanted him just as much as it was clear that he did. The only question was, how much longer was he going to let things continue like they were? ******************************************************************************* As Jesse walked to his Music Appreciation course, all he could think about was which of the people he passed had been given a gun by Amber to shoot him with. Or which one of them would drug and kidnap him for Amber to torture and then dispose of. Basically, which of them knew Amber and which didn't. He pretty much knew by now that she was no longer interested in being his roommate. Yet, she couldn't tell any of her sorority sisters without getting herself into trouble. Which meant that for the time being, he was staying put. The only other quick way that Jesse could think to get rid of a person was to kill or have them killed. He'd like to think Amber wouldn't do something like that, but as he was quickly discovering, he didn't know what Amber was capable of. And she sure was going to great lengths to show him that every chance she got. He wanted to try to reason with her again when he woke up but was surprised to find her gone already. He'd even woken up a little early to talk with her too which posed the question of where Amber possibly could have been so early. He knew her schedule just as well as she knew his. Of course, Jesse hadn't really been one to follow his schedule but he had one nevertheless. And now it seemed she was following suit and going off into her own tangent. As Jesse was coming to the conclusion that he no longer enjoyed Amber Tanner, he made his way into his class, temporarily forgetting about who else he didn't enjoy, even though the two of them shared the class with him. "God no, didn't you flunk out already?" Sierra, who was at the front of the class near the door sharpening a pencil as Jesse walked in, asked. "She takes roll you know." "Yes and no doubt cringes every time she sees that your name is still on the list of students in her class," Jesse replied. "More days of earfuls from you." "Oh you're a laugh and a half," Sierra replied. "Meanwhile while you scare small children as the face of that creepy ass Burger King mascot, I'll be the one trying to buy the entire company." "Yes, that music degree will go a long way towards your dreams and real job as a street urchin. Excuse me" Jesse replied, not caring anymore about Sierra as he looked for a place to sit. Jesse was feeling so conflicted that he was contemplating doing something he never thought he'd do. "What?" Noah asked, after minutes passed of him pretending not to see Jesse standing next to him. "I was wondering if you wouldn't mind if we talked," he started. "That's all you do, talk," Noah replied. "Only, I learned like day two to stop listening." Jesse gasped. "Hey, I have a legitimate problem here. Aren't you the least bit curious as to what it is?" "Maybe I'll be the one that invents the human flyswatter," Sierra said as she squeezed past Jesse to get to her seat next to Noah. "You know? To get rid of pests that won't go away?" "I'd imagine it gets quite lonely when you're that huge a bitch," Jesse retorted, deciding he would in fact take a seat next to Noah. "Hey, that's my backpack!" Noah exclaimed. "It'll live," he replied. "So anyway, about me." "Said that human fly before he was human flyswatted," Sierra spoke. "Why don't you keep that large head of yours over there, alright love?" Jesse spoke, annoyed. Noah slouched in his seat as he realized that today wasn't going to be a very good day for him. He'd already had a bad night and Jesse was really working towards the door he'd reserved as his last nerve. He didn't need or want this today. "So you seem like a guy that would have someone wanting to kill you," Jesse started to which Noah chuckled. "Now why would you think that?" he asked plainly. "Well because I have on several occasions," Jesse replied as if it were common knowledge. "I'm sorry, did you say you wanted help?" "Alright, alright," Jesse replied when he realized that Noah was tuning him out. "What do I do to make things right with someone I've screwed up with?" Noah turned to face Jesse. He could tell that something was bothering and he was actually serious about it. The only problem was that Jesse was far from his favorite person. He could actually attest that he liked Jesse even less than Shawn at the moment. "I'm gonna go ahead and be vapid and assume you're talking about me right?" Jesse raised an eyebrow. "You, I was-" "Right?!?" Jesse could tell that the only way he was going to get any help out of Shawn was as long as he played by his rules. And he was just crazy enough right now to follow them. "Whatever eases your mind, mate," Jesse replied sitting back. "Well you could always apologize," Noah replied. "I mean there's a difference between saying the words and meaning them. People can really tell when you're sorry." "I think I'm way beyond that at this point," Jesse replied. Noah could tell that Jesse was inquiring his help concerning someone else but he also knew that it wouldn't hurt to get some kind of apology out of Jesse to him anyway. "Are you fishing for some sort of apology? Is that what this is about?" Jesse asked suspiciously. Jesse had since morphed into the type of person that asked more questions than one who answered them. He was suspicious of everyone and everything. Naturally being as rich and well known as he was in England he had to be to a certain degree anyway. But now that was all amplified by a million percent. He figured himself crazy enough to start wearing tin foil hats if he believed Amber had aliens reading his thoughts. "Jesus Christ Jesse do you want my help or not?" "Okay okay!" Jesse exclaimed, realizing that this was going to be harder than he thought. "I don't want this to be hard you know. I just figured you to be the perfect person to give me advice on this particular problem." "Oprah and all her money couldn't help you and your problems," Sierra snorted as she flipped through her Music Theory book. "Hey, you're the one with the problem with me remember?" Noah asked. "Well that's because you're a bloody fucking-" "What?" Noah cut Jesse off, staring at him with the utmost intensity. "I'm a bloody fucking what?" Jesse knew what he wanted to say. Or at least, what he ordinarily would have said. But something about his situation today felt different. It was almost like he was fonder of Noah than he originally thought. Almost like he didn't care he was a queer. Almost. Jesse sighed with indifference as he looked away from Noah and down on the ground. People didn't usually make him nervous. And he'd never really been one to hold his tongue. But he realized that he was going to have to if he wanted Noah's help. "It's my roommate," Jesse started. "I think she wants to get rid of me, I'm just not sure how." "She?" Noah asked curiously. Jesse just stared at Jesse. "You weren't kidding about that living at the sorority were you?" he asked. "Amber wants me out, I know she does and it would be okay if not for the fact that she'd be in loads of trouble if the wrong people knew that I was staying with her in the first place." Noah let out a sigh as he scratched the top of his head. "I'm not really sure how I could help you with that," he said. "I've never known any guys that lived with a girl in a sorority. Any straight guys." Jesse realized that as long as there was a window, Noah was going to get in any dig he could. And while he didn't exactly feel like he deserved it he knew that he wasn't in any position to try and start something with Noah. After all, he only had to endure him for an hour and a half a day, every other day of the week. "You're loving this aren't you? A bloke like me having to go to a git like you for help." "Pretty much yeah." "Good morning everyone," the class professor greeted as she entered the room, shutting the door behind, effectively putting to rest Jesse and Noah's conversation for the time being. ******************************************************************************* "I know this is college and all but we ain't been in school but three damn weeks," Grace complained as she sprinkled salt on her unseasoned cafeteria fries. "Shit, that man's ass is crazy for giving us a test this early." "Look at it this way," Trey replied. "At least it's only Psych." "That damn ridiculous class. I don't need to be keeping no damn dream diary neither," Grace replied. "That shit is retarded." Trey agreed but he'd always done the work he'd received, regardless of what his personal views on it were. It did seem a little early to him that he'd have a test after only three weeks. It concerned him to the point where he was worried about just how many tests he'd be taking during the semester and how far apart each one would be. Of course, he also knew that he had bigger, more significant things to think about but he figured he'd rather just enjoy hanging out with Grace. "So you wanna go to the library after this and get a jump start on studying up?" Grace asked. "Yeah, that's cool," Trey replied, taking a sip of his orange soda. Up until now Trey had been feeling relaxed and laid back all day. Dro hadn't been in class earlier for him to have to deal with and he and Grace were finally talking again. Everything had been going great up until Trey noticed Dro approaching their table from behind Grace, instantly feeling like something was crushing the life out of him as he did. He wasn't sure what to do. Most, if not all of him wanted to get up and run. Not because he was afraid of Dro, much. But because he was afraid to be around him and Grace together so soon after he and Grace had reestablished their friendship. He wasn't sure what would happen if confronted with that situation. But from the looks of things, he was about to find out. "Hey baby," Dro spoke, kissing Grace on the cheek from behind, effectively surprising her. "Dro, baby, what are you doing here? I thought you had to help your moms friend at the shop today?" "Plans changed," Dro replied, taking a seat next to Grace and stealing a fry off of her plate, munching on it. "I wanted to spend time with you this afternoon before I go back." Grace looked a bit guilty when this was said. "Except that I gotta study baby," she replied. "Study?" Dro asked, taking another fry off of Grace's plate. "Here boy," Grace spoke, pushing the plate over to him. Trey watched as Dro dug into the fries as if he hadn't eaten anything in days. Not that fries would help as Trey knew they were about the least nutritious thing he could have been eating at that moment. "Can't you blow that shit off? You study too much." "And you don't study enough," Grace shot back. "You know we got a test coming up in Psych and you already know yo ass can't fail another class." "Baby, why you gotta be talking about that shit in front of people?" Dro asked through gritted teeth. That little fact didn't surprise Trey much. Dro to him was about as smart as he looked. What did surprise him was the fact that he was finally recognizing that Grace was in fact eating with someone as Trey hadn't received any kind of greeting at all. Not that he was really expecting one. A mean scowl at least would have been nice. "Just study tomorrow, I'll study with you," Dro said, half convinced. Trey wanted to snort at the statement but decided against it. "I'm studying today," Grace replied. "With Trey." That was about when the mood shifted from an already uncomfortable one for Trey to a dismal one. Dro looked over at Trey, studying him like he was trying to decided whether or not to beat the shit out of him. "With him, huh?" Dro asked. "Baby, don't start-" "What, I ain't startin shit," Dro spoke, shaking the hand that Grace tried to lay on him away. "Dro-" "Naw you know what, fuck that shit," Dro spoke standing up in a huff. "You wanna do me like that? You wanna pick this lil pussy bitch over me, that's cool." "Dro!" "Naw, I'm out," Dro replied, leaving, but not before shooting a glare that sent shivers down Trey's back. "Lemme guess," Noah spoke, looking back at Dro leaving as he approached the table. "That was the boyfriend." "Hey Noah," Grace spoke, still a little frustrated over what had just happened. Trey was still shaken up. Something about that look Dro had flashed him wasn't sitting right with him. He didn't like it or want to like it but he knew that it had to mean something. He wasn't a complete fool in those kind of matters. Noah could sense that something was going on as he looked Trey and Grace over and was about to comment on it before he noticed an unwanted face heading his way. "Shit," he sighed with annoyance, still standing at the head of the table with his tray of food in hand. "I heard from the dyke with the glasses that you might be here," Jesse said as he approached Noah. If Trey was feeling tense before, seeing Jesse certainly was doing nothing to alleviate any of that said tension. As a matter of fact, it was actually angering him. Jesse was a person he could honestly say he liked even less than Dro. "Damn, small world," Grace mumbled as Jesse finally stood face to face with them all. "What do you want Jesse?" Noah asked, annoyed. "Well I just thought you talking with me earlier was an open invitation to continue the conversation we never finished," he replied. "We aren't friends," Noah replied, taking a seat next to Grace, Jesse replacing his standing at the head of the table. "Oh god no, of course not, who would want that?" Jesse asked. "Is this how he asks for someone's help?" Grace asked no one in particular. "Jesse, you may not have noticed but I'm kinda busy with my friends here," Noah replied. "Go find someone else to listen to you. I heard there was an on campus shrink-" "That quack would actually have me pay him to listen to me," Jesse replied. "Besides, Jesse Yorkshire doesn't need to talk to the looney doctor. I'm not a loon." "No, of course you aren't," Noah sighed, deciding already that he was bored with Jesse and all his theatrics today. "You really should consider looking into it you know," Grace teased. "I'm sure you'd have lots to talk about what with the whole elevator trauma you experienced-" "That day on the lift was traumatic for me in ways you probably couldn't even imagine," Jesse replied. "Of course, it's because of the company, not the circumstance." "Hey, I was on that elevator with you!" Grace exclaimed. "Really^Åyou were?" Jesse asked looking Grace over curiously. "Huh, interesting." Grace and Trey exchanged looks as Noah tried his hardest to look invisible at the moment. "And now you're all mates?" Jesse spoke, more to himself than anyone else. "Fancy that." "So other than wasting our time, what the hell else did you have in mind in the way of torturing us today?" Noah asked, still sounding annoyed. Jesse stopped looking Grace and Trey over before sitting forward at the table ready with a response. "Well, I thought about it and realized that the best way for me to stay safe is to give Amber her space for the time being," Jesse replied. "Therefore I've graciously decided to allow you all the gift of my company and time until-" "Oh brother, here we go with that shit again," Noah sighed. "What, do you not want be my entourage for the day?" Trey and Grace exchanged looks to a fit of laughter and giggles from Grace. "Your entourage? Are you serious?" Grace asked. "Why do I eat here? I got a perfectly good cafeteria in my own dorm hall," Noah started complaining as Jesse looked around. "God awful place this is," he said. "Anyone feel like sushi?" "Actually I think we gotta get going to the library," Grace replied, standing up and grabbing her backpack. "Right Trey?" Trey looked over at Noah before shaking his head. "Yeah, yeah big Psych test coming up," Trey replied. "Gotta pass." "Wait, no you guys can't leave," Noah started. "Yes, I was going to let the three of you get a picture with me to sell on Ebay," Jesse added. "Oh go fuck yourself okay!" Noah started, getting ready to raid on Jesse before Trey cut in. "Look, there's Shawn!" he spoke, as Shawn approached. Jesse stared at Shawn approaching curiously as Trey and Grace gathered their things. "Hey Shawn," Trey greeted as he and Grace started towards the cafeteria tray conveyor belt which was located about ten five feet away from where they had been seated. "Wait, you guys are leaving?" Shawn asked, tray full of food in hand. "Gotta study man," Trey replied, feeling a bit guilty for not only leaving Noah with Jesse but Shawn with Noah. He could only imagine the awkward conversations that would ensue between the two of them. And with Jesse thrown in the mix, that just made everything worse. But he had only just made up with Grace. He wasn't about to pass up an opportunity to get closer to her after the time they'd missed already. Noah looked over at Jesse as Jesse looked them both over. "You know, I don't carry all guy entourage's but for the two of you, I'll make an exception," Jesse spoke whimsically. Noah glared over at Shawn realizing that his already dismal day was now turning into a miserable one. After a few moments passed in which no one spoke, Jesse took the liberty of being the one to break the silence. "You know, I believe I'm sensing an overwhelming sense of hostility between the two of you," he started. "So I think for me, I should go check to see if my would be killer is silting around our room. I need to shower anyway." "Yeah, you do that," Noah mumbled. "Chasing everyone away, eh Noah?" Shawn chuckled. "How about I chase myself away, punk," Noah replied, deciding he didn't have to be around Shawn if he didn't want to be, leaving him alone with Jesse. "You should probably go find someone to sit with before I go," Jesse spoke, standing up. "Eating alone is rather unattractive." ******************************************************************************* "Okay okay okay so, assimilation and then anal retentive-" "Like you-" "Stop it!" Grace spoke in a playful tone. Trey laughed along with her before looking around in the library. It seemed like there were a lot more people around just a few minutes ago. "Damn, how long have we been here?" he asked. Grace took out her cell phone and flipped the lid open. "Ooh, damn, it's almost twelve!" Grace exclaimed in surprise. "Midnight?" "No duh Sherlock," Grace replied. Trey hadn't been aware that time was really passing at all. He'd come to the library with Grace with the intention of studying lightly for a test that was more than a week away but wound up having more of a good time than he thought he would. He and Grace spent the majority of their time sharing stories about their lives and finding out things they both had in common and liked. The last time they checked to see what time it was, nearly four hours earlier, had been when they decided to go ahead and start studying for the test. Trey had been so preoccupied with all his problems that he hadn't really been keeping up with the reading assignments and had nearly seventy five of them to read. Having Grace around to constantly interrupt him with some Psych trivia didn't help the reading go any faster either. He probably hadn't read more than five pages. "We spent all day in here doing nothing basically," Trey said, as he started gathering up his things. "Just means we get to come back over and do it all over again until we study completely," Grace replied, starting to gather up her own things. "I can already tell I'm gonna be one of those people that crams for every test," Trey said. "The complete opposite of me in high school." "Ooh I hope not," Grace replied. "Or we gon have to stop hanging out." Trey laughed at that statement as he and Grace started out of the library. "Oh so is that what were doing? Hanging out?" "No we's homies plotting out next drive by. Black people hang too you know." "Just not like white people right?" "Don't get me wrong, they cool and all and I like em and shit, but they can be a little weird, you know what I'm saying?" Trey himself knew that he could be just as weird if not weirder than the strangest white person. But if they wanted an example of a weird white person he knew to look no further than Jesse. "How weird is it that all of us that were trapped in that elevator that day know each other?" Grace asked. "I mean, me, you, Zoey, Shawn, Noah, Jesse and that Amber girl." "It's like six degrees of Kevin Bacon, minus Kevin Bacon," Trey replied. "You don't get weirded out by all that shit do you? I mean I like to believe in my fair share of coincidences but this seems like it's going above and beyond." "And beyond even^Åthe Twilight Zone!" Trey joked, humming the theme song to the show as he danced around a giggling Grace. Trey and Grace had walked a good ten minutes and were almost at their dorm hall before Grace realized that she was missing something. "Aw shit, I left my damn cell phone back in the library," Grace sighed in anger, making an abrupt turn. "No, wait wait wait, it's late and were right here at the dorms," Trey said. "You go in and I'll go back and get your phone and bring it to you before I go back to my room." "You sure?" Grace asked. `Yeah, yeah go ahead," Trey replied. Grace lingered for a few moments. "Grace it's okay, I think I can handle getting your phone by myself," Trey grinned. "So could I. You're just lucky I like being treated like a Nubian queen," Grace replied. "Just go already," Trey laughed before starting back towards the library. ******************************************************************************* As Jesse made his way down the sidewalk leading towards the sorority house he couldn't help but to catch sight of something that looked familiar to him. As a matter of fact, everything he saw scattered out around the lawn happened to be his! And what was more, people were gathered around paying Amber for the various items. "Oh what the fuck is this!" he asked, storming over to Jesse. "Oh hello, are you interested in buying something?" Amber asked. "What?" Jesse asked incredulously. As he stared at an innocent appearing Amber a guy walked up and got between the two of them holding a pair of his very expensive designer sunglasses. "How much do you want for the sunglasses?" he asked. Amber looked over at Jesse before looking back at the guy. "Twenty bucks," she replied. Jesse gasped. "Those cost me easily ten times that amount!" "Oh but they cost twenty dollars now," Amber replied taking the twenty from the guy. "Hey give me those back!" Jesse demanded. "You can buy em off me. For two times what I paid-" "And even that's a discount on what I paid in the first place," Jesse sighed angrily as the guy walked off. All of this was beyond anything Jesse could comprehend. Never in a million years did he think Amber would stoop so low as to sell all of his things and especially not at midnight. Then again, it probably was the best time for a garage sale of sorts as college kids lived and breathed at night of which he could attest. But still, it was all of HIS stuff. And Amber was selling it all away! "What the bloody hell Amber? I slight you and this is how you decide will make things even?" "Sir if you aren't gonna buy anything I suggest you leave," Amber replied, taking a crisp hundred dollar bill from someone buying a pair of Jesse's designer jeans. "I'm about to close up shop soon." "This is all MY STUFF!" Jesse exclaimed, looking around in disbelief. "Or is it?" Amber looked over at Jesse curiously. "I'd like to think you haven't gone completely mad," Jesse replied before storming towards the sorority. He was going to see for himself just what Amber had been up to while he was away. As he started through the halls of the sorority, he passed several girls who all seemed to be interested in watching what was going on out on the lawn. He wasn't entirely sure, but he figured it probably was against the stupid American's rules to sell things if so chose to on the lawn. They were all interested nonetheless. As he got closer to his and Amber's room he noticed Heather and Stacy standing nearby looking worn out. "Ladies, having a good evening are we?" he asked, deciding to play the friendly card. Both girls looked over at him, one looking more nervous about something than the other. "Is something wrong?" Jesse asked. He wasn't sure, but part of him didn't want to check his room because he was afraid of what he'd see. Part of him already knew the answer, which was why he was so hesitant to enter. "Oh Jesse, I'm so sorry!" Stacy, who'd decided she couldn't hold it in any longer than the two seconds she'd been forced to, cried, jumping up and latching onto Jesse, taking him by surprise. "Oh no, I'm not going anywhere," Jesse replied. "There's always going to be a Jesse Yorkshire." "I actually like you. I wanted things to work out," Stacy said, upon letting go of Jesse. Heather stood up and crossed her arms. "I guess you really screwed up huh?" she asked. Jesse stared at her pensively for a few seconds before starting towards his room, shocked but not completely to see what it looked like once inside. He immediately entered the closet and confirmed his suspicions. "What the fuck is this?" "Don't worry Jesse, I'm free," Stacy spoke. "God, what a slut," Heather mumbled. "What? I am," Stacy replied. Jesse wasn't quite sure what to do or say. Amber had finally won. She'd warned him that he was on thin ice with her and because he believed her to be just as stupid as she looked, he didn't believe her. And now she was selling all of his possessions out on the lawn. But something inside him felt strange. It wasn't that he cared about all of his things being sold away as if Amber had any right to do so. His family was worth dozens of millions of dollars. He could easily replace any and all of it. But it was really that he was realizing for the first time that he actually cared about Amber. He'd felt like maybe he did for sure but it took her literally throwing him out of her life for him to notice that. And now she wanted nothing more to do with him. And he had to accept that. "Well then, there's nothing more I can do here I see," Jesse sighed. "Oh, um, did you want my number or^Å." Stacy mumbled. Jesse started back towards the front of the sorority to where Amber was still playing shopkeeper on the lawn. Seeing her now it almost seemed like he was seeing her in a new light. It was strange. She seemed like an entirely different person to him now. "You win I suppose," Jesse spoke when Amber caught his eye. "You never realized that I always do," Amber replied, with a sly smile before looking away. Jesse had never felt more alone in his entire life than he did right now. He always knew that he never really had anyone. His family was the furthest thing from family to him. Amber was really the only person he had. And now she was gone. He had no idea where to go or what to do. But he realized that he had to figure it out. And soon. ******************************************************************************* Shawn was never really one to worry about people but since coming to college, he'd found that there was someone after all that he could say he worried about. He liked to think of Trey as being just as responsible, if not more so, than he was. He liked to think that he was completely fine on his own. But then there was that part of him that felt like as long as he wasn't with Trey, really WITH him, then he was always going to worry. It seemed like Trey was all he thought about now. It was probably true. It was going on twelve A.M and he was still gone. Trey had a cell phone but he had told him before that because he didn't really have anyone to talk to he usually forgot to bring it with him. So he couldn't even call him to see if he was okay. He knew that he was with Grace but he hadn't thought to ask for her number yet. He knew that the library was less than ten minutes walking distance away from the dorms. He could probably get there in five minutes if he walked fast. But he didn't want to be Trey's mom or anyone like that. He didn't need that much security. He just wished he's come back soon so that he could know that he was okay. Maybe then they could finally get around to talking about their kiss. He was still thinking about how he'd bring it up and what he'd say when he heard a knock at the door. He knew that it probably wasn't Trey but he was still hopeful as he jumped up and rushed to open the door, disappointed when it turned out to be^Å "Noah? What do you want? It's like twelve in the morning," Shawn replied. "Is Trey here?" Noah asked. "I kinda wanted to talk to him about something." Shawn was about to berate Noah for wasting his time stopping by but something about what he said got him thinking. Talk to Trey about what, he wondered. "He's not here, actually," Shawn replied. "He's been gone all day. The library-" "Yeah, I know I^Å." Shawn stared at Noah staring at him. "Well I'll just go there and let him know I want to talk," Noah replied. "Right, be a dick and interrupt him studying because YOU need to talk," Shawn replied. Noah glared at Shawn, actually debating whether or not to steal him straight in the jaw. "I just wanna check on him," Noah decided to reply instead. "So do I," Shawn quickly said. A few moments passed by where each guy stood staring at the other wondering whether or not they really cared enough about Trey before Noah finally relented. "Well why don't we go look together then?" he sighed, a bit disappointed that he'd decided to ask. It took a moment but Shawn finally relented himself. "Hell, why not," Shawn replied, walking out of the door and letting it shut behind him. ******************************************************************************* Trey had found Grace's cell phone right where she'd left it at the table they were sitting at with no problems. He was tempted to delete Dro's number from her phone but realized that he wasn't that vindictive. Or stupid as he knew Grace probably would and could kick his ass, if Dro didn't do it for her. He decided instead to just quickly return it for her and get back to his room. Shawn was probably just as worried about him as he was the night he didn't come back to the room. For a mid September night, it was surprisingly cool out. Not so cool he needed a jacket, but cool enough he covered his arms some by rubbing them. The fact that he was just nearing the common courtyard, near the giant fountain in the middle spewing water at it's lighted base, made things a little bit worse. The night seemed surprisingly calm, which he wasn't used to since he learned pretty quickly that college students lived at night. There was always someone out and tonight it seemed like there was no one. That wasn't stopping him from being paranoid for some reason, however. He almost felt like^Å.was pretty sure he felt like someone was following him. He didn't know why. He usually wasn't so jumpy. Maybe it was just that it seemed like the night was empty, he figured, as he looked behind him. He must have looked a little bit too long because the next thing he knew somebody's fist was connecting with his face, which knocked him back to the ground, down the stairs leading into the courtyard. "What was yo ass doin out with MY BITCH this damn late?!?" came the vemon spewing forth from an obviously drunk and upset Dro. Dro was honestly the last person Trey ever expected to see out at night, let alone near the library of all places. But somehow through some unlucky turn of events, he'd managed to run into not only him but three of his cronies as well, including the tenant his mother had let stay in the their upstairs apartment, LaTario. "What the fuck is your problem?!" Trey asked, clenching the side of his mouth. He knew Dro didn't like him but he couldn't honestly see him as some kind of threat to his relationship with Grace. "I didn't forgot what yo punk ass did to me," Dro growled. "Tryna screw up shit with me and Grace." "No you were doing that all on your own," Trey replied, backing up as Dro walked towards him. He could hear himself getting closer and closer to the fountain as it was even spewing droplets of water on the back of his neck. "Look, I just wanna get back to my room," Trey replied. "I'm not trying to start shit." "I know yo ain't," Dro replied. "Cuz I'm trying to start shit!" Trey wasn't given the opportunity to run, not that he'd be able to get anywhere with Dro and the entire gang he and his friends made up surrounding him. But if he could've run, he probably wouldn't have let Dro knee him in the chest, causing him to stumble to his legs. And if he could've run, he probably wouldn't have let Dro punch him back after he tried to stand up, which caused him to slip around the water near the fountain and hit his head on the edge of it, falling inside the fountain face first. And of course if he could have run, he wouldn't be sinking to the bottom of a two foot deep fountain unconscious while Dro and his friends ran away themselves in fear. ******************************************************************************* "I thought you said he was at the library," Noah sighed angrily as he and Shawn started back towards the dorms. "You were there, you heard em," Shawn replied. "No actually I was too busy dealing with Satan's child to notice," Noah replied. "So you're saying you don't listen when Trey speaks in other words?" Shawn asked slyly. "You know something-" "Speak of the devil's child," Shawn spoke, pointing at a lost and depressed looking Jesse walking in the opposite direction past them. Noah looked him over as he passed. Usually whenever he and Jesse were in the same place together Jesse was first to piss him off somehow. But now it was almost like he didn't care enough for that. It had him wondering why. "Hold on a second," Noah spoke, stopping Shawn, who sighed in annoyance. Noah walked over to Jesse and approached him cautiously. "Everything okay?" he asked. "Oh yeah, absolutely brilliant^Åexcept that my life is SHIT!" he replied, making Noah almost sorry he asked. Jesse looked up for a moment like he was about to elaborate but then stopped when he noticed something at the fountain. "Then again, my life is still loads better than that fellow there," he said. Noah and Shawn each looked over to the fountain and noticed that someone was in it. Not quite a cruel as Jesse to just let him stay there, the two of them ran over to fish him out. "I might as well help," Jesse said aloud. "I've got nothing else better to do now." Shawn and Noah worked to flip the person over and fish him out, surprised with what they saw. "Trey?!" each of them said in unison. "Wow, this is weird huh?" Jesse said. ******************************************************************************* My Yahoo Group is currently under construction. I will be leaving the links to the finished advanced chapters of The Living Years up until I need to move them later (but only into a new folder). Feel free to stop by and check out the progress: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/JoJoPresents-GayFiction/ Personal email: crossingboi2004@yahoo.com Copyright 2006