Date: Fri, 28 Jan 2000 09:16:11 PST
From: Chip Dyp <chipdyp@hotmail.com>
Subject:  Moving On? 4

The following program contains material suited for a mature audience.  If
you are not over 18 you should be leaving now.  Of course I can't control
you and neither can anyone else really.  This story is entirely false except
for the true parts.  And now for our feature presentation.  Viewer
Discretion is advised...

    My web site is located at http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Atrium/2898.

Moving On? 4
by:  Chip Dyp  (chipdyp@hotmail.com)

*Ten Years Later*

    I had just woken up on a lazy Sunday afternoon, when there was a knock
at the door.  I walked to the front door, and peered out the window.  Even
after ten years, I recognized Simon.  I pulled open the door, and crossed my
arms.  "Hello, Simon."

    "Hello, Brandon.  Long time, no see."

    "It has been a long time indeed.  To what do I owe the pleasure of this
visit?"

    "Can I come in?" Simon asked meeting my gaze and not backing down.

    I stepped aside and let Simon enter the house.  I led him into the
living room and pointed to the couch.  "Have a seat.  Would you like
something to drink?"

    "No, thank you."  Simon walked slowly over to couch.  "It doesn't mix
very well with my medication."

    "Some water, or some Coke?"

    "Water would be good."

    I poured a large glass of ice water for Simon, and a Scotch on the rocks
for myself.  "Forgive me for being blunt, Simon, but why are you here?"

    Simon took a sip of the water and then stared at the cubes floating on
the surface.  "I came to apologize, for Codie and for myself."

    "It's a little late for apologies, Simon.  The time has past."

    "I know," Simon said. He put his glass of water down on a coaster.  "But
I had to come apologize anyway."

    "Why didn't Codie come apologize for himself?"

    "Because he's dead," Simon said.  Simon looked down into his lap and
repeated quietly, "Because he's dead."

    "I'm sorry, Simon.  I didn't know."

    "You don't care anyway.  I was hoping that I could talk to you, but I
can see that it would've been better to let sleeping dogs lie."  Simon stood
to leave, turning away from me.

    "Simon, I'm sorry," I said taking his hand.  "Please, sit.  It's been so
long."

    Simon looked at me and then sat back down.  "I've wanted to come and
apologize to you for a long time, but I couldn't.  Believe it or not, Codie
felt bad about what he did to you."

    "If anyone but you told me that, I wouldn't believe them."  The ticking
of a mantle clock was the only noise in the room as Simon stared at his
glass.  "So what have you been doing the past ten years?"

    "Working.  I joined a law firm in Vancouver after we moved and worked my
way up in corporate law."

    "That's great," I said enthusiastically.  I was proud of Simon.

    "Not really.  I hated every minute of it.  But, the money was good.  It
let me save up some money for the future, and when Codie got really sick it
let me pay for private nursing."

    "Was he sick for a long time?"

    "No, thankfully he didn't suffer long."  Simon shook his head.  I could
see tears forming in his eyes as he talked about Codie.  I handed him a
Kleenex so he could wipe away his tears.  "Thanks.  So, I hear that you and
Shawn are still together."

    "Yeah, we're still together.  He's a great guy.  He's at a conference in
Las Vegas this weekend.  How long will you be staying?  I'm sure he'd like
to talk to you again."

    "Somehow I doubt he'd want to see me."

    "You'd be surprised.  He's a very forgiving guy."

    "It's not important really.  I'm flying out later tonight," Simon said.
He finished his water and put the glass down on the coaster.

    "Oh, where are you going?"

    "Toronto, then London, Amsterdam, Berlin, Paris, Zurich, Venice, Rome,
Athens, and Cairo."

    "Wow, you're really going to be doing a lot of traveling."

    "Yeah, I wanted to see the world while I still had time," Simon said
quietly.  Simon was hiding something.  Even after all these years, I could
tell something was going on.

    "While you still had time?"  I asked with a frown.

    "I'm dying, Brandon."

    My eyes opened wide and my jaw dropped to the floor.  Simon was dying?
I couldn't say anything as I looked at my friend.

    "I can see that you're surprised," Simon said with a wry grin.

    "Yes, I am surprised.  Is there anything I can do?  Can I help you
somehow?"

    "No, there's nothing you can do.  I've got K-variant AIDS."

    "How did you get K-variant AIDS?"  I asked as the answer came to me.  I
answered my own question with my next breath.  "Codie gave it to you.
That's what he died of."

    Simon nodded and looked into his lap.  "He told me he never cheated on
me, and I believe him.  The doctor's think that he was exposed to the virus
about twelve years ago, based on the mutation visible in the virus.  He was
one of the first people diagnosed with the K-AIDS.  And because we never
used condoms..."

    "You were infected."  I finished Simon's sentence quietly.

    Simon nodded and fiddled with his watch.  "Yeah.  The end stage is
awful, Brandon.  For the last two weeks of his life, Codie was in constant
pain.  The doctor's kept him doped up so that he couldn't feel it.  You know
how the comedians joke about how they legalized Heroin for end stage K-AIDs
patients.  It's needed.  Morphine did nothing.  There was nothing they could
give him, except Heroin to ease the pain that last week."

    "I'm so sorry," I said as I walked over to Simon.  The tears were
running freely down his face and he was sobbing quietly.  I sat down and
held Simon in my arms as he cried and cried.  I felt so sorry for him.  He
had suffered so much.  I also felt sorry for Codie.  Though I still despised
what he had done to me, nobody should have to suffer like he suffered.

    Simon cried on my shoulder for a few minutes before he sat up and wiped
his eyes.  "I'm sorry.  I'm going to have to get over his death sooner or
later."

    "It's all right.  I know if Shawn died, it would take me a long time to
get over the loss."

    "Hopefully, you won't have to worry about losing Shawn."

    "So how long have the doctors given you?"  I asked, rubbing Simon's
back.

    "A little over a year before I'm going to need private nursing care, and
18 months till I'm dead."

    "Oh Simon," I said hugging him as I started crying.  When I finally
stopped, I wiped the tears from his cheeks.  "Should you be travelling if
you are sick?"

    "Codie and I wanted to go traveling through Europe and see the pyramids,
but he hit end stage two years earlier than the doctors thought.  I don't
want to put it off for too long."

    "I guess I understand.  It's too bad that Codie didn't live long enough
to go with you."

    "In a way, he is coming with me.  I had his ashes compressed into some
small stones that I'm taking with me.  I'm going to leave one in each of the
cities that I visit."

    "That's very romantic."

    "It's a way for me to get over his death.  Mind you, it won't be long
before I join him."

    "Don't talk that way," I said putting my hand on his thigh.  "They may
find a cure."

    "It took them over 20 years to find a cure for non K-variant AIDS.  They
aren't going to find a cure for K-Variant in less than ten years."

    "You never know," I started, but Simon just shook his head.

    "I know.  Brandon, I had to come back and apologize to you.  I knew
before we moved that Codie had lied to me, and he confirmed it for me before
he died.  I loved him so much though.  He was so kind, and caring with me.
I know he loved me."

    "I'm sure he did," I said smiling, "Why don't I go make us some soup and
sandwiches?"

    Simon looked at his watch and shook his head.  "I can't stay much
longer.  I've got to get back to the airport.  My plane leaves in three
hours."

    "Did you need a ride back to the airport?"

    "No, that's okay.  I've got a rental car that I have to return at the
airport.  I just wanted to talk to you."  Simon stood and smoothed his
pants.  He looked as beautiful as ever, and it was hard to believe that he
was dying.  I had seen the TV specials about K-Variant AIDS on the
television and it was sad knowing that Simon was going to whither and be in
extreme pain.

    "Well, when you get finished touring, please come and visit Shawn and I.
  We'd love to have you come visit us for a while."

    "I'd like that," Simon said.  I walked over to him and gave him a big
hug.  Simon tensed up for a second and then relaxed into my embrace.  I gave
him a kiss on the cheek, and patted his back.  Simon pulled open the door
then stopped and looked back at me.  "I'll see you again, old friend."

    "And I'll see you."

    I stood on our front porch, and watched as Simon backed out of the
driveway.  He waved one last time before driving off.  I watched his car
until it turned the corner and then went back into the house.

    I never expected to see Simon again, and now I was wishing that I had
tried to patch things up with him years ago.  I grabbed the bottle of Scotch
out of the bar, and poured myself another drink.  The alcohol went down
smooth, as it always did, but things had changed.  I looked at the bottle
for a second and put it away.  I went to the den and woke Shawn's work
computer up.

    "Max, access my photo archive."

    "Accessing.  Archive located."

    "Display all pictures matching the search parameters Simon."

    "Accessing.  48327 pictures searched.  342 matching search parameter."

    "Start slide show on Den monitor.  20 second delay between pictures."

    The first picture came up on the monitor.  It was a picture of Simon and
I, back when we were in grade seven.  It was a picture my parents had taken,
and eventually saved to PhotoCDs.  Their foresight saved all the pictures
they had taken.  They were all catalogued and dated.  They were one of my
few remaining links to my family's past.

    I sat back in the big leather chair Shawn had in the den and stared at
the picture.  Even back then, dressed as Luke Skywalker, he was cute.  "Max,
access music database."

    "Accessing.  Music database located."

    "Begin audio playback.  Random selections from songs marked as slow and
late 90's."

    "Audio level?"

    "Mood music."

    The computer brought the music up slowly, letting it sit in the
background.  I looked back at the pictures.  There was one of Simon dancing
with a girl at a dance.  I couldn't remember the event, but it didn't really
matter.

    I sat in the dark den, staring at the pictures as they kept changing.
Each picture brought a smile to my face.  At times I started laughing, and
at times I started crying.

    Eventually, I got into the pictures that friends had taken of Simon and
I together.  There were pictures of us lying together on the couch.  Of him
sitting in my lap.  Of Christmas at his parent's house before they had
moved.  Of him passed out in a thong after drinking way too much tequila.  I
was looking at a picture of us sitting together, his head on my chest when
my oldest son ran into the room and jumped into my lap.  Simon and I were
both dressed in black tuxedos for Simon's sister's wedding when the wedding
photographer had snapped the picture.

    "Max, freeze slide show."

    "Daddy!" My son Daniel exclaimed as he gave me a big kiss.

    "Hey there, kiddo.  So did you have a good visit with grandma and
grandpa?"

    "Yeah, we had lots of fun.  Grandpa took me fishing and I caught a big
fish."

    "Wow, that's great.  Did you let him go?"

    "Nope, we took it home and had grandma cook it for supper."

    "Did you eat it?" I asked sitting my son on my knee.

    "Yeah, it was okay.  Zach wouldn't eat his though.  He said it was
icky."

    "Well, Zach didn't know what he was missing," I said as I gave Daniel
another kiss.  I looked up and saw Shawn smiling at me from the doorway of
the den.

    "Daniel, you go help your brother clean up those chips in the back of
the van," Shawn said in his annoyed father tone.

    "Yes, dad.  I just wanted to tell Brandon about the fish I caught."
Daniel slid off my knee to the floor and walked out of the den.

    "Did you miss me?"  Shawn asked as he walked into the room.  He put his
hand on my shoulder and looked at the monitor where the picture of Simon and
I was still displayed.

    "I spent every minute you were gone missing you."

    "Really?  Is that why you're looking at old pictures of Simon?"  Shawn's
eyebrow had arched and he had his arms crossed.  I was just about to answer
when Zach ran into the room and over to where I was sitting.

    "Daddy!"

    "Hey, little buddy.  Did you have fun and grandma's and grandpa's?"

    "Uh huh, 'ook, I wost a toof," Zach held out one hand and showed me a
baby tooth, while he opened his mouth to show me which one he had lost.

    "Wow, my little guy is growing up.  You're gonna have to put that under
your pillow so that the tooth fairly can visit."

    "Do you fink she'll come?"

    "I'm positive.  You go put that under your pillow, and then you and your
brother can tell me all about your visit."

    My son gave me a huge grin and ran out of the room.  "Can we talk about
Simon after we put the boys to bed?  I have something to tell you."  I said
as I stood and wrapped my arms around Shawn.

    "All right," Shawn said kissing me on the cheek.  I turned my head and
kissed Shawn passionately.  We were still locked in our embrace when Daniel
poked his head into the room.  He giggled a little and then slipped down the
hallway, his younger brother in tow.

    Shawn broke the kiss and smiled at me.  "Well, you better go ask them
about their trip.  I'll go cook up some supper."

    "There's a salad in the fridge, some sliced potatoes in foil, and some
steak defrosting on the counter.  I was thinking we could have a BBQ."

    "Sounds good to me," Shawn said patting my back.

    I went into the living room as listened as my two sons told me about
their trip.  They were so excited as they told me about their visit.  Shawn
and I had decided to let them stay with Shawn's parents while he was in
Vegas for his engineering conference.  They told me about the people they
had met, about the things they had done, and then they asked if they could
stay there again.  I smiled and told them that we'd have to talk to grandma
and grandpa.

    "Supper time, boys."  Shawn called from the kitchen.  The two youngsters
jumped up and ran into the kitchen.  They dug into the food that Shawn had
dished out for them.  When we all finished supper, I helped Zach put the
dishes into the dishwasher, while Shawn and Daniel hand washed a couple of
dishes together.

    We sat in front of the TV together, watching a movie with the kids.
During the movie Shawn and I cuddled while the boys lay on the floor in
front of the TV.  When the movie finally ended, we sent the boys to go get
ready for bed.  The boys brushed their teeth and washed up before they
crawled into bed.  I went with Zach and read him a story, while Shawn
listened to Daniel read him a story.

    After I shut off the light in Zach's room and kissed him good night, I
went out to the living room and poured myself a Scotch.  I sat down on the
couch and sipped at my Scotch.  Shawn came out of Daniel's bedroom and
pulled the door shut.  He smiled at me and walked over to the bar.  He
poured himself a shot of vodka over ice and sat down in the chair opposite
to me.

    "So, what's with the sudden interest in Simon?"  Shawn took a sip of his
vodka.

    "I talked to him this afternoon.  He was on his way to Toronto, and then
Europe."

    "Was Codie with him?  Did he have the balls to come see you?"

    "Codie is dead," I said quietly.  "And Simon's dying."

    "Oh," Shawn said quietly.  "From what?"

    "K-variant AIDS."

    "Oh, wow, oh Brandon.  I'm so sorry.  I know how much Simon meant to
you."

    "Yeah, he was one of my best friends," I said as tears started to form.
"I just wish I would've tried to talk to him before now."

    Shawn stood and walked over to the couch where I was sitting.  He sat
down beside me and wrapped his arm around me.  "Shhhhhh."  Shawn hugged me
while I cried about an ex-boyfriend and a good friend.  When the tears
stopped flowing, Shawn kissed me on the cheek.

    "Is Simon still in town?  I'd like to talk with him."

    "No, he flew out this afternoon.  I told him that we'd love to have him
come visit us, when he finished his tour."  I looked at my love with pained
eyes.  "I hope you don't mind."

    "No, I don't mind.  I know how much it would mean to you.  Simon was an
okay guy."

    "Yeah, he is.  He apologized to me, for both him and Codie.  He said
Codie felt bad about what he had done to me."  Shawn smiled at me, and put
his hand on my thigh.  I put my hand on top of his, and squeezed.  "I missed
you a lot this week."

    "I missed you too," Shawn said finishing his drink in one big gulp.
"Why don't we go to bed, and you can tell me some stories about Simon."

    "I'd like that," I said.  Shawn stood up, and helped me of the couch.
We peeked in at our two young sons and smiled as they slept.  Shawn walked
into Zach's room and retrieved the tooth.  He left a five-dollar coin under
the pillow and then slipped back out into the hallway.

    "They're growing up so fast," Shawn said quietly as he looked at the
little tooth."

    "Yeah, they are."

    "You know, while I was driving home, I got to thinking.  Let's adopt
another child.  I know you want one, and I've decided I'd like another one
too."

    "Are you sure?"

    "I'm sure."  Shawn gave me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.  He took
my hand and pulled me into the bedroom.  That night, Shawn lay there and
listened as I told him story after story about Simon and I growing up.
After a while, my eyes started drooping, and Shawn pulled me close.  My eyes
closed and I slept.

    Simon came and visited Shawn and my family about a year later.  He was a
little thinner, but he told us story after story about his trip.  He smiled
when he saw the three boys, and told Shawn and I that we had a beautiful
family.  He stayed a couple of days, visiting with us and some other people
he knew in town, before he headed back to Vancouver.  He didn't last long
after he returned home, slipping away in his sleep in his parent's home.

    The whole family flew out to Vancouver for the funeral and to spend some
time with Simon's parents.  They were heartbroken over the loss of their
youngest son.  I think they enjoyed meeting the family though, especially
our youngest son, Simon.

END
September-November 1999
16915 Words