STANDARD WARNING: This is a work of fiction. Any similarity to individuals, living or dead, is pure coincidence. Do not read this story if you are offended by man-to-man romance or sex. Do not read if you are underage according to the laws in the country, state/province, county, city/town/village or township where you live. There is sex between males. You have been warned!

Copyright 2000 by archer. Permission is granted to Nifty Archives, ASSGM, and gaywritings, to post one copy. No part may be copied, reproduced, republished, or reposted on another website without written permission from the author.

Paternal Instincts

By Archer

Chapter 35

Brian awoke with a shout!

There was a shadowy figure standing in the doorway to his bedroom. The hall light was on and it backlit the figure. Maybe it was the SS to drag him off. Maybe it was the police and they knew what he and Mike had done this afternoon.

Matt’s voice: "I’m sorry, Brian. I didn’t mean to wake you up."

Matt had turned on the hall light to watch Brian sleep. He couldn’t get back to sleep since he was awakened by a nightmare and because he was upset over an argument he had had with Brian. It was their first major argument. Matt had just wanted to watch Brian sleep. He always looked so angelic and innocent. Somehow, Brian had sensed a presence.

"I owe you an apology," Matt said in a businesslike monotone. "I’m sorry I lost my temper.

Brian sat up in bed. "I’m sorry, too," he said quietly and simply.

"Sometimes I have to lay down the law."

"But you don’t have to do it like you did."

"You’re absolutely right." Matt rummaged in his mental toolbox for another, more comfortable, topic. "Did you get your letter off to Tommy today?" Each Friday, Brian sent Tommy a letter. It was the only way the two boys could keep in contact since St. Luke’s would not permit Brian to call Tommy or vice versa. Every week, Brian begged a stamp from Matt, until Matt bought him his own book. The return letters from Tommy were sporadic, but Brian wrote weekly nonetheless. Matt was dying to know what was in the letters, but Brian never offered to show him, and Matt was too proud to snoop.

"Well, goodnight," Matt said sadly as he turned and started down the hall again. The reconciliation had been stiff and formal but sincere. There was still a lot that they both left unsaid, and the unspoken words were a wall of ice between them. Matt had asserted his parental duties, and Brian had rebelled in typical adolescent fashion.

Brian muttered something. Matt didn’t understand and reappeared in the doorway to Brian’s bedroom.

"What?" Matt asked.

Brian was crying. "I said I still love you."

Matt crossed the room in two strides. He knelt beside the bed and engulfed the boy in a tight hug. "I love you, too, Brian. With all my heart."

"You scared me at first. I thought you were a Nazi at the door."

Matt chucked. "I’m sure you think I’m a Nazi sometimes."

"Why were you awake, anyway?"

"I had a bad dream. I think that movie affected me more than I thought at first. I guess it makes sense, though?"


"In a way, gays are still persecuted and discriminated against. No, there’s no concentration camps now as there were then. The Nazis did send thousands of gay men to the gas chambers. That’s where the pink triangle symbol came from. Instead of a yellow star of David, they wore a pink triangle."

"Schindler’s List gave me a lot to think about."

"Me, too. Just like the Jews in the film, we’ve got to watch to make sure it never happens again."

They held each other for a long moment, allowing their bodies to say the hundreds of other things that were still left unsaid.

Brian gripped him tighter. A few moments later, he asked the question that had been troubling him since their argument. "Will you adopt me?"

Matt was silent for a long time.

"Do you need time to think about it?" Brian prompted him.

"No." For a terrifying split second Brian thought Matt was going to give him the answer he dreaded.

"No, I don’t need time to think about it. Where’s that ring I bought for you at Northalstead Market Days?"

"It’s on the dresser. Why?"

Matt found the ring among a constellation of coins and other jewelry. He sat on the edge of the bed, took Brian’s left hand and grinned at him.

"You are a young man that anyone would be proud to call a son." He lifted Brian’s left hand and slipped the ring on his finger. "Would you be my son?"

Brian threw his head back and laughed. "Sometimes, Matt, you are such a freak!" Then he became serious. "Yes, I will be your son."

"The six-month limit is almost here. Jeez that time went fast. You came to live here full-time in August, so as of February, you’ll be eligible."


Matt was under a lot of stress. His argument (he refused to call it a fight) with Brian was just the tip of the iceberg.

His mom had moved back to the Chicago area, after living out of state with another man for several years. They had talked on the phone at length about her decision. Gloria told Matt she wanted to experience what it was like to live on her own. She had never had the opportunity to do so because she had always been someone else’s daughter, or wife or mother. She got a job at Palos Community Hospital, and settled in an apartment in Orland Park. Matt wondered about the underlying reasons and motives for her moves, but was too busy to question her about it. He was too busy managing the bookstore. She got along well with Tim and had gradually accepted Brian.

The bookstore he managed was still doing well, but it was almost a victim of it’s own success. He could never find enough employees. And the pay guidelines from the company were ridiculous. Not to mention that it was the Christmas season, and he was working in retail.

The Monday before Thanksgiving, he got a call at the store. He was shorthanded because one of his part-timers had called in sick. There were more shoppers than usual at the mall, and Matt was feverishly trying to finish preparing the store for Christmas.

Martha answered the phone and said to Matt, "It’s some young man asking for dad." Martha was just teasing Matt. She knew it was Brian, and knew all about Matt’s becoming a parent. In fact, she was one of his biggest supporters.


Matt intended on this call taking as little time as possible. "What’s up, Brian?"

"I need to talk to Tommy."

"You wrote him this week, didn’t you?"

"Yeah, but I need to talk to him."

"You know you can’t. What happened?" To a customer, he said, "Thanks a lot. Enjoy your book."


"I was talking to a customer. Now, tell me what happened."

"I got a letter from Tommy and he got kicked out of his foster home."

"I thought he was at St. Luke’s."

"He is, or he was. Oh, I don’t know," Brian was frustrated. "That’s why I have to talk to him."

"Brian, even if you call him, they won’t let you talk to him."

"Well, maybe you can take me after you get home from work."

"That’s not possible, either, Brian, You have to have prior permission to go on campus. You know that."

"You know Bill. Maybe you could pull some strings."

"Brian, I’m extremely busy right now," he said as he opened the safe for change. "You know all the answers to your questions. You were a student at St. Luke’s. Put your other father on."

Tim came on the line. "Hi, babe. Busy?"

"Very. What is Brian’s major malfunction?"

"I guess that Tommy is back at St. Luke’s. He was in a foster home, but they kicked him out. Tommy wrote that he wanted to see Brian right away."

"That’s sad, and I feel for Tommy. But, they have counselors at St. Luke’s who can help more than Brian."

Tim said quietly, "Sometimes when you need someone to talk to only a friend will do."

Matt sighed. Tim was right. "OK. I promise I’ll call Bill as soon as I get home. I don’t have time to call from the store. Don’t promise Brian anything until I find out the situation."

"Sounds good to me. Sell lots of books. I love you."

"I love you, too. And tell Brian I love him."


The moment he walked in the house, Brian handed Matt the letter. As he took off his coat, he read the childish script.

  • Dear Brian:

    By now, you probly now that I’m not at my foster home any more. They kick me out. Didn’t tell me why. I need you. I wont to see you. Please. Ask you dad to bring you to St. Puke. Or something. I miss you. I love you. Write soon.

    Love, Tommy

  • "Something must have happened," Matt muttered as he dialed Bill’s number. Luckily, Bill was still in his office. He hated to bother Bill at home. Of course, Bill didn’t hesitate to call Matt at home or work if he needed something.

    "You did it again, Matt," Bill said when he answered the phone.

    Matt smiled. "Did what?"

    "Came through at exactly the right time."

    Matt was tired and hungry and in no mood for guessing games. "What do you mean, Bill?" he asked with slightly more edge to his voice than he intended.

    "You’re calling about Tommy Grady. He’s going through a rough time. And I don’t think he has anywhere to go for Thanksgiving."

    "What happened? Brian got a letter from Tommy. Why was he kicked out of the foster home? I met him once or twice and he seemed to be a nice kid."

    "He is. Tommy’s a great kid, but it was just a bad situation. It’s really kind of a sensitive topic. Tommy is eleven so his counselor would be Mary Harrison. Are you free tomorrow evening?"


    "I’ll set you up with an appointment and she can fill you in on the details of what happened. You have no problem taking him for the Thanksgiving weekend?"

    "No problem at all. I have an extra bedroom."

    "Thanks, Matt. Mary and I appreciate it." He paused. "Oh, by the way, are you adopting Brian?"

    "Yes, it looks like it." From upstairs, he heard a whoop. Brian had been listening in on the extension. Matt yelled to Brian, "Hang up that phone, NOW!" Matt heard the click, and within seconds, Brian was downstairs hugging and kissing him. Matt giggled.

    "Is that him?"

    "That’s our little blond bombshell." To Brian he said, "Take it easy, please, I’m still on the phone."

    "St. Luke’s does everything for you when you adopt. We hire an attorney, set up the court date, everything. All you have to do is show up."

    "Wow, sounds like a lot of work."

    "It’s part of the services we offer. Just to let you know, and give you something to think about, O’Donnell is planning some sort of Adoption Ceremony at the end of school. This will be the first time we’ve done it. It looks like a neat ceremony so far. Well, I’m sure you have to go, and I do, too. Mary will be in touch before Thursday. I’m sure you will want the whole story before you commit to taking Tommy."

    When Matt got off the phone with Bill, he sat down to talk with Brian. "Tell me about Tommy."

    "Like what?" Matt hated when Brian played stupid.

    "Well, for example," he asked patiently, "how did you two end up hanging out together?"

    "He was really homesick at camp one night, and I was sitting outside with Tip doing Quad Duty. He wouldn’t stop crying, and he was keeping the whole cabin awake. Tip brought him outside to the gazebo, but he still wouldn’t stop crying. I had an idea to get Prints. When I handed him Prints, he stopped right away."

    "That was a good idea, Brian, and a very sweet thing to do."

    "After that, he started to follow me around. Jason and Mike didn’t want him around. It even bothered me at first. But there was something different about him, like I knew him before."

    Matt chuckled.

    Brian lowered his voice. "And no, we never did anything."

    "How did you know I was going to ask?"

    "I just knew. It would have been too weird. He’s more like a little brother to me. Plus, he’s too young."

    "So he was more like a brother."

    "Yeah. How is he doing, now?"

    "He’s OK. He’s getting some counseling. I’m sure he’ll be much better once he sees you."

    It had been several months since Matt had seen Mary Harrison. Her office was right next to Bill’s in the basement of the Admin Building. Their offices were a study in contrasts.

    Bill’s office was dark, and not only because it was in the basement. He eschewed the fluorescent lights overhead for a desk lamp. One wall was paneled in dark wood. His chairs were covered in black material. He had no pictures on the wall. The desk was cluttered with a computer and papers and a phone.

    Mary’s office, on the other hand, was bright and cheerful. She had no qualms about using the overhead lights. The walls were covered with artwork done by children, some of it framed. She had an art easel set up with newsprint, obviously for the kids who came to her office to draw on. Currently, the easel was blank. Once he was seated in one of the chairs, which were covered in floral fabric, he noticed the small school desk against the wall. There were markers, colored pencils and crayons in plastic cups. Matt knew these materials were used for working on their Lifebooks.

    Lifebooks were a therapeutic tool that some counselors used with their clients. It was a tool to help the boys deal with the loss of their natural families and to help the transition to new permanent families.

    Mary bustled into the room wearing a long, flowing skirt. Matt had never seen her in a dress. He grinned as she shook his hand.

    "I’m so pleased you taking an interest in Tommy," she began.

    "I have to confess it has more to do with Brian."

    "Even so, Tommy needs the support right now. It will help to spend time with Brian and you. I know you’re a great parent."

    "Just a second, Mary. No one said anything about fostering him let alone adopting him. I understood I was just taking him for Thanksgiving weekend."

    She smiled and her eyes crinkled. "Well, I can hope. Tommy is different from Brian. He has more needs than Brian. He’ll need more supervision. And his educational needs are different."

    Matt wasn’t entirely comfortable with the direction of the conversation. Mary was talking as if Tommy’s adoption was a done deal. He changed the subject. "So what happened with the foster placement?"

    "He was placed with a family in Downer’s Grove. They had just lost a son, who was about eleven or twelve to leukemia less than a year ago. They have an older son who is fifteen or sixteen. Everything went along well until this weekend. A few weeks ago, there was some sort of sexual incident between the two. The older son kept it quiet as long as he could, but then, I guess he couldn’t. He broke down and told the whole story to the parents."

    "Well, the parents freaked out. There’s no doubt in my mind that they overreacted. They threw him out of the house. They simply dumped all his stuff onto the front porch and called us to come and get him."

    "Oh, God, that poor kid."

    "It didn’t help that Ray Rossi, the other elementary counselor, didn’t tell them about his sexuality, or that we think his sexuality is, well, different. If Rossi had been upfront with them about it, they might have been more watchful, or they might not have taken him at all. In any event, this whole situation might have been avoided. There may be some fallout from this, I need to let you know." She paused while she tapped a pencil to her lips. "But then again, he’s quite resilient. There may be no repercussions at all. You’ll have to watch him carefully."

    "I will," Matt promised.

    "There’s one more thing we need to address." She paused nervously. "Have you talked about sex with Brian?"


    "You will need to sit down with him and have a talk with him about limits," she swallowed nervously. "Sexual limits."

    "What do you mean?" Matt asked, although he knew full well what she was talking about.

    "Well, some sex play may be natural among boys, but it also can be avoided. And in this case, it would be best considering Tommy’s history. We can’t leave some things unsaid and hope that the kids will do what we expect."

    "Brian mentioned to me that they’ve never had sex. He feels too brotherly."

    "Even so, Matt. I think you need to make it clear to Brian. Can you do that?"


    Mary relaxed visibly. Outside the office, Matt could hear the voices of boys. One of them was insisting, "But she said I could see her anytime. I want to talk to her."

    Mary’s brow furrowed. "That sounds like Tommy." She stood up and poked her head outside her office. "Tommy," she called. "Tommy, come here for a second."

    Tommy grinned and approached the counselor.

    "There’s someone I want you to meet." She led the redhead into the office.

    "You’re Brian’s dad," Tommy said to Matt.

    Matt smiled at the handsome boy. "Yes, you remembered."

    "Matt is going to take you to his house for Thanksgiving."

    "You are?" Tommy asked with unselfconscious delight. He ran to Matt and threw his arms around him. "Oh, thank you, thank you."

    Matt was pleased at the spontaneous display of affection.

    "Can I go with you tonight?"

    "No," Mary answered before Matt could respond. "You have school tomorrow."

    "Oh, man."

    Matt smiled at him. "But you can stay until Sunday."

    "What time will you be here tomorrow, Matt, so I will have him ready?"

    "I’m off all day tomorrow. I have to work Friday. Tomorrow is a comp day for me." He thought for a moment. "I guess I’ll wait until Brian gets home from school, then he can come, too. Is that OK?"

    "Perfect," Mary smiled.

    Matt spent the next day preparing for the holiday and for his new visitor. He had invited his mom for Thanksgiving dinner, and she was due to arrive about three in the afternoon. Marty was going to stop in for dessert after he had dinner at his parents. It was going to be an interesting combination of people, one that Matt hoped wouldn’t come back to haunt him.

    All morning, Matt worked steadily cleaning house. Matt liked to have the house to himself, and it was a rare occurrence these days. He cranked up the receiver to listen to music as he did chores. He vacuumed, peeled and chopped vegetables, took inventory of all the food and started laundry. He swept and mopped the kitchen floor.

    In the basement, one load of laundry finished and he went down to start the dryer. The dryer blew its hot breath in his face when he opened the door. He pulled out the clothes, and put them in a basket, intending on folding them. As he loaded the wet clothes into the dryer, someone poked him in the ribs.

    He let out a shout!

    It was Tim.

    "For God’s sake, Tim, you scared the shit out of me!"

    Tim had a mischievous grin on his face, and his dimples were showing.

    "What are you doing home, anyway?"

    "I forgot my lunch."


    Tim wrapped his arms around Matt’s waist and lifted him off the ground. "Ok, so I came home because I knew you’d be here." He kissed Matt’s neck.

    "That’s sweet," Matt laughed.

    "So how about a little afternoon nookie?"

    Matt laughed again. "This scene sounds so familiar. I seem to recall an incident in the shower." He opened the washer to add fabric softener.

    "I’m excited about meeting Tommy."

    "You’ll like him, I’m sure."

    "So does this mean the giant stork is going make another delivery?"

    "Let’s not jump the gun here."

    But Tim wouldn’t give up the joke. He rubbed Matt’s tummy. "You don’t look pregnant. How far along are you?"

    "If I’m pregnant, it’s all your fault," Matt replied in the same vein.

    "Well, I’m thankful to know I’m the father." Tim hugged him. "You know what else I’m most thankful for?"

    "Tell me."

    "You. I’m grateful for you and everything you’ve given me."

    Matt closed the lid to the washer and turned around again. "I love you, too. I don’t think I tell you enough." His voice quavered with emotion. Tears threatened in the corners of his eyes. They kissed. Their tongues melted into one inside their mouths. Matt made little groaning sounds in his throat.

    Tim rubbed the front of Matt’s sweatpants until he had a roaring erection. As they continued to kiss, Tim worked his hand under the sweats and his underwear until he gripped Matt’s cock. He pulled his cock out, and sank to his knees and took it in.

    Without notice he released Matt’s cock, and a string of saliva trailed from the glans to the concrete floor. Tim grinned again, placed his hands under Matt’s arms and lifted him onto the top of the washer. Matt was excited at the sight of Tim’s forearms as the muscles flexed to lift him.

    Roughly, Tim pulled his sweatpants the rest of the way off. He took his penis in his mouth again, and bobbed up and down. Then he took a deep breath in through his nostrils, and plunged all the way down. His lips came to rest on Matt’s pubic hair.

    At the exact moment he did this, the washer started the spin cycle. The vibrating motion and warmth of the washer, plus Tim’s loving mouth sent Matt into an orgasm matched by few others in his lifetime.

    Matt panted and ran his fingers through Tim’s hair.

    "Thanks for lunch. That was much better than some old sandwich."

    "We have to have a little talk about Tommy," Matt said on the way over to St. Luke’s.

    "OK," Brian said tentatively.

    "We talked about this before, but I just wanted to make sure we’re on the same page. OK?"


    "You said before that you felt brotherly toward Tommy…."

    "Dad," Brian interrupted. Brian rested his left hand on Matt’s forearm. "I’m not going to have sex with Tommy. I promise. OK?"

    Matt threw his head back and laughed. Partly it was the way Brian said it. He had stated it in an almost patronizing manner, as if he were a kindergarten teacher talking to her class.

    Matt couldn’t resist playing along with him. "I’m so glad we had this talk, dad," he said with a grin.

    "No problem, son."

    "Oh, and dad? One other thing."

    "Yes, son?"

    "Try not to drop too many hairpins in front of my mother tomorrow."

    They were one of the first to arrive at St. Luke’s to pick up a boy for the long holiday weekend. Most of the other parents foster or natural, would arrive after work to pick up their boys. Matt parked the Saturn in back of Sears cottage in the small parking area. As they approached the building, small faces watched their approach. To Matt, the scene was touching and sad in a way. He recalled that his approach to Trees cottage was never under such scrutiny.

    He met Peggy Zimmerman, who was the housemother for Sears. She was a warm, friendly woman who had once been a nun. A group of about nine boys gathered in a semicircle around Matt and Brian.

    Peggy called down the hall for Tommy. He ran down the hall carrying a gym bag he had found in the clothing store. St. Luke’s ran a clothing ‘store’ with donated clothes and castoffs purchased in bulk. Boys could purchase what they wanted with points they accumulated for doing chores or earning good grades.

    "Hi, Brian," Tommy said in his high boyish voice. He hugged the older boy.

    Peggy smiled widely as she observed the scene. The other boys looked on with envy. Tommy turned his attention to Matt.

    "You must be Brian’s dad." Tommy already knew who he was.

    "Yes, I must be," Matt joked.

    "Oh, a funny guy," Tommy said as he hugged Matt.

    "Have a nice holiday," Peggy said. He shook her hand.

    "You, too. I’m sure we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other in the future."

    As they exited the building, Tommy said to Matt, "Would you carry me?"

    Matt grinned and picked him up. He wondered about Tommy’s request. Brian had never made such a request. He wondered if Tommy had done it so the other boys could see it.

    It didn’t matter in the least. Carrying Tommy for the short distance to the car, Matt could tell how comfortable he was going to be with the boy.

    Almost as if he was part of the family already.

    Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed it. As always, your comments and suggestions are welcome. Just click on one of the links below. And don't forget to check out my website (Chapters are always posted there earlier than here) and my other story here on Nifty, Pocketful of Stars, in the Young Friends section.


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