I'd like to say that I had some witty retort to Jim's question. I'd like to say that I kindly but firmly told him it was none of his business. I'd even like to say that I made a joke out of his outrageous query, and turned the tables on him by asking if he was trying to make it a threesome or something.... But, no, I can't say that that was what happened. Being the cool-under-pressure, calm, dignified soul that I am, I promptly spewed my beer out onto the table. What liquid didn't go flying went right up my nose, sending me into a coughing fit. Soon I was soaked in my beer, unable to catch my breath, looking like a complete and utter fool.

After I'd somewhat regained my composure, if not my dignity, I looked at Jim.

"What in the world do you mean by THAT?", I asked. "Today's the first day I've seen your brother, let alone anyone ELSE in your family, for a long, long time..."

Jim gazed back at me with a rather smug look on his mug. For some reason, I found his leer to be very unsettling.

"Yeah, right. I know my brother, and I know you. Well, at least I know your type, anyway. Let me ask you again: how long have you been banging my bro?", Jim queried.

As he spoke, Jim continued to stare at me, like he was enjoying making me more uncomfortable than I'd ever felt - anywhere - in my entire life. He didn't take those piercing eyes off of me once during this short exchange. If he had just been staring at me, that would have been bad enough...but I found his accompanying smirk to be maddening, and all the more unsettling.

Like I'd said, I'd somewhat regained my composure by this time, and had my wits somewhat about me. Not only was I able to focus in on what Jim was asking me, but I was also starting to get not just a little ticked off by his interrogation. Oh, what the heck, let's face it - I was a LOT ticked off by his comments!

I put the steeliest gaze into my eyes that I could muster, and looked him right in the face.

"I really don't see what I don't do, or what I do do is any of your concern", I managed to spit out. "And with whom, if ANYONE, I do it REALLY isn't any of your damned business! If you don't like them apples, you can stuff 'em where the sun don't shine, buster!"

Jim didn't even flinch while I was hissing at him. I glared at him, he glared back at me, and neither of us made a sound. All in all, I'd say we had this glaring business down pat! The silence was deafening as the seconds became minutes. Finally, I couldn't stand this conversation for one more minute.

"Jim", I managed to mutter out, with a bit more civility than I had a few minutes previously, "I have no idea what's gotten into you, or why you're thinking what you're thinking. But, really, don't you think you need to be having this conversation with your brother?"

With that, I stood up and walked out of the kitchen, retracing my steps out the door that Brian and I had entered what seemed like hours before...but, in actuality, was only about ten minutes ago or so. I walked over to the garage door, and paced back and forth for a few moments, collecting my thoughts and calming my overheated blood pressure. As sanity returned to my brain, I came to the conclusion that I wasn't gonna let Jim get to me. Heck, I wasn't even gonna give him the satisfaction of even thinking he'd gotten under my skin! Once I'd come to that vein of thought, I went back in the house. Instead of returning to the kitchen, I turned, and went up the stairs that I had watched Brian's naked butt ascend a few minutes before.

At the top of the stairs, there were several doors. I paused for a minute, thinking to myself, "Oh, great, Joel! Now what?!!"

Luckily, and much to my relief, the door to my immediate left opened and Brian stepped into the hallway, now fully dressed.

"Woah, dude!" Brian said, as he somewhat jumped back. "You scared the tar outta me!" A grin enveloped his face as he spoke, so I knew he wasn't all that concerned.

I put my finger over his lips, and made a "shushing" sound, whispering, "OK?" to him as I beckoned him with my finger, motioning for him to follow me. Brian had a quizzical look on his adorable mug, but he nodded back that he understood. He followed me down the stairs, and back out onto the driveway.

"Bri", I began, after looking at him for a few moments, "you....just....are.....NOT.... gonna fucking believe what happened after you went upstairs, man. Jim just started in grilling me, wanting to know what I was up to..."

Brian erupted in that belly laugh of his that I was starting to get so fond of. Well, normally I was fond of it; right now, it just didn't fit the picture, you know?

"Joel! You doof!" Brian shot back. "Jim was just yankin' your chain, trying to get a rise out of you, dude. That's how he sizes people up! I don't know why he does that, but he always does if he thinks he can get away with it. Just call him on it, and let it go, guy. Really, that's all he was doing."

"Uh, Brian. I don't think so...", I replied. "He, uhm, ah....he....he asked me how long I'd been fucking his brother!"

You know that color change that takes place when a sunny summer sky gives way to a darkened mass of rain clouds? When you just know that in a matter of minutes, you're going to be drenched in a cloudburst by the rapidly-approaching thunderboomers? Well, that's how I felt at that instant, looking at Brian's face. The smile literally evaporated off of his face in a megasecond, and was replaced by this harsh, hideous mask of anger.

"Jim...is....TOAST!", Brian spat out, measuring his words with his fury. "Damn him! I've been putting up with his shit all my life. That ends here!! No...more...."

With that, he strode purposely back towards the house. I quickly caught up to him, and grabbed him by his arm. In hindsight, that probably wasn't one of my brighter moves, ya know? He was just soooooo angry, I'm probably pretty lucky he wasn't completely irrational, or I would have soon found my butt on the cement. Yup, I was pretty darned lucky there, after all, I'd say! He glared at me, then looked at where my hand was yanking on his arm. Before he popped me one, I knew I need to calm the dude down, and fast.

"Bri!" I said, in a soft and what I hoped was a soothing voice. "Cool it! You're not gonna solve one damned thing by charging in there, and rearranging Jim's face. 'K, dude? C'mon, babe. Chill."

As I spoke softly to him, I started stroking his arm, up and down, then around, with the tips of my fingers. After about a minute, the fierce fire that had been in Brian's face evaporated as quickly as it had appeared, and he seemed to be himself once again. As I continued to whisk my fingertips along his arm, I even managed to elicit another of his patented grins. I knew then that we'd be OK.

"OK, dude, assuming you don't wanna stroke something else...." he questioned, wiggling his eyebrows. Then he laughed. "Now, what are we gonna do about Jim? I really don't think he can shovel out his crap to you, or about me, like that!"

"Well", I replied, "we really don't have to do anything right now. Let's think about it, 'K? We can just go out to the patio, talk to your folks, eat, then get the hell out of here for tonight. Then we can figure out what to do later."

We just looked at one another for a long moment, letting our brains catch up to all the emotions that had been flying around. Gosh, what a day this was turning out to be...and I had thought when I got out of bed that morning that the most exciting thing that would happen that day would be the trudging drudgery of moving into the house across the street!

All of a sudden, I had an evil thought. My brain must have sent some kind of signal to my face, for Brian picked right up on it.

"Dude, just WHAT are you thinking about doing?" he asked, hesitantly.

"Bri, methinks its about time for the two of us to have a little fun with Mr. Jim, don't you? If he thinks something's up, why can't we convince him that I'm after him instead of you?"

"Oh, dude", Brian replied. "You are sooo bad. That would be so wrong...."

Then he grinned. "Hell, yes, dude. I'm in! Now what are we gonna do?"

We huddled there in the driveway for a few minutes, deciding just what we were gonna do. As we came to agreement, we had to clutch our sides we were laughing so hard! And, with that, our plan was set into motion. Ol' Jim was gonna get one hell of a show before this barbeque was over!"

I'm so, so sorry that this chapter has taken so long to post....but what are ya gonna do when your hard drive fries, and the chapters you have written are unrecoverable? Sigh....I had to start over, completely from scratch! Luckily I remembered the nuts and bolts of what had been written, but without a working computer things seemed to take forever. Anyway, I'm back on-line and writing again, so hopefully the next chapters will get fired out a bit faster! Hope you're enjoying the story as it enfolds.  I've really been amazed by all of your e-mails, and I'm so appreciative you took the time to write!  Thanks!!  If you'd like to drop me a line, I can be reached at: jackmeoffalot@hotmail.com .  Until next time, then, take care!