Date: Wed, 01 Mar 2006 21:26:42 -0500 From: Tyler Peel Subject: The Road Home Chapter Twenty Three DISCLAIMER: WARNING!! This is a work of homoerotic fiction written by an adult for the purpose of entertaining other adults. If you are not eighteen years of age or you have any problem with this type of literature then this is a warning to read no further. The author will not be held responsible for any reason if you choose to disregard this disclaimer. If it is not legal to read the following fictional story in your country then please stop now. The Road Home Yahoo Group: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/the_road_home/ THE NEW IRC CHAT ROOM ON NEVERNET: You don't need to have mIRC to chat! **There will be and open CHAT SESSION for all readers to meet each other and have fun on Sunday March 5, 2006 from 8 p.m. to 9 p.m. E.S.T. (New York City time)** Treb says to tell you 'bring your own punch and pie cause Greg never remembers'! 5 EASY STEPS TO CHATTING: 1) COPY and PASTE the following into your Address bar! 2) 3) Fill in your NAME, AGE, LOCATION (all must be filled in) 4) You may be REQUIRED to UPDATE your JAVA from Sun Micro Systems! It is safe to do so : ) 5) CLICK Problems? Email Treb at treb03@gmail.com **only with questions regarding the Yahoo Group or IRC Chat or Java problems! "Hey Roadies! It's me and Luke here!" "Tyler! You're supposed to say its Luke and me here! We know you're Canadian and all. but you could at least talk using basic grammar!" "Can we get back to why we are here Lucas?" "Find! Be a tard. what does it matter to me?" "Okay Roadies. now you know the expression 'time to pay the piper'?" "I'm the PIPER! Pay me!!!!!!!" "Shut up Luke!" "Whatever." "Nifty doesn't run on good intentions and this story you are reading, while it is free, the costs of hits to the websites and to those who volunteer their time is not free! Me and Luke." "Tyler!!!" "Sorry! Lucas and me noted that there are over 700 members in the Yahoo The Road Home Group!" "Woo Hoo! Yeah! Roadies Kick Ass!" "Luke! Is that a jar of peanut butter over there?" "Where? Where?" "Over there!" Tyler points. "Sorry, as I was saying. If everyone gave $10.00 U.S. to the 'Nifty Archive Alliance' then that would be." "$7000.00! Oh Yeah! That would buy me.. ummm about 1700 jars of peanut butter!" "I thought you had gone to look for peanut butter Luke?" "You're just trying to get rid of me aren't you?" "Noooooooo Luke! Never!" "You're jealous because the readers love me more than you!" "Uh huh Luke. yeah. I'm soooo jealous!" "I love you Tyler!" "I love you too Luke, now stop sucking up! Now where was I? Oh yeah, it has to be in American funds!" "None of that funny Canadian monopoly money readers!!!" "Lucas!" "What? Read the link! It says U.S. funds only!" "What link Luke?" "This link! It gives all the information needed about keeping your fine ass posted here at Nifty on the Internet!" "LUCAS! Don't talk like that! Now here is the important part!" "Peanut Butter!!!!!!!!" "No Luke, not peanut butter! Some people don't feel safe about giving out private information, using personal cheques or credit cards! So all you need to do is put $10.00 U.S. wrapped in a piece of paper and stuff it in an envelope. You don't need to include your name or anything? Just proper postage and you can send it to this address!" "$10.00? That's not very much Ty!" "To some people it is Luke!" "Not to Bret over in Nifty chat it isn't!" "What do you mean Lucas?" "Did you know that me makes dollars per year!" "You're not shitting me Lucas?" "No way! He was bragging in the chat room the other night!" "Okay, maybe Bret can give a little more but if everyone gave at least $10.00 then it would really help make a difference!" "Brett you can donate at least a thousand fmpttffp" "Sorry! Ummm Luke was about to give you the address where to send your donation so take it away Luke!" "Luke? Come back here!" "But you said to take it away." "You getting one of those thingys in your head that Mom gets when the school calls aren't you?" "Yeah Luke. something like that." "No problem. I can finish up what you started! That's why America is here for you Canadians, Ty!" "Owww owwww! Let go of my ear!" "Apologize Luke!" "Owwww. k. I'm sorry you're a Canadian!" "Try again Luke!" "Owwww. I'm sorry I offended Canada!" "You can do better than that!" "We love Canada, just not your worthless funny money!" "Luke?" "Wot?" "Sit over there and shut up!" "Sorry readers! We know you want to get on to reading this chapter and all but please make a small donation and as Luke was suppose to say, put a little note saying that your donation comes via "The Road Home" and maybe we can report how much money YOU readers raised?" "Tell 'em you donated cause Luke asked you too!" Luke yells from the corner. Tyler glares at Luke. "Please send your donation to this address with appropriate postage" NIFTY ARCHIVE ALLIANCE PMB 159 333 Mamaroneck Avenue White Plains, NY 10605 USA "Did you tell 'em they could make credit card donations too?" Luke yells. "Stop yelling Luke and get over here! No, I was about too but I think you've taken care of that. You can make credit card donations via a link on the URL address posted above." "Luke stand up, Luke go here, Luke go there, Luke sit down, Luke shut up! What do you think I'm your f.." "Maybe you Roadies could include a few extra bucks to help buy some soap to wash Luke's mouth out?" Tyler grins. "No argument here Ty. do you ever wash your hands? Yuck!" "Sorry, I was messing up Kyle's hair earlier!" "Yuck! Why did you have to tell me that?" "Don't worry a little peanut butter will clean your mouth up." "Speaking of. you promised me peanut butter for doing this! Where is it?" "I brought it! You know I would never lie to you Luke." "So where is it? Is that a jar of peanut butter in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? HAHAHA" "Shit! That is a jar of peanut butter in your pocket! Hahaha wait till the readers find out! They actually think you've got a big pmmfth" "I'm really sorry about this Roadies! Kyle was supposed to be here but he's fixing his hair. please give responsibly, but do give!" "Make the cheque payable to Lucas Ajjjpmmp" "No readers! Make a cheque payable to the 'Nifty Archive Alliance' please!" "Hey Ty, did you see the pics posted of me on the Yahoo Group? I'm much cuter than you!" "Whatever. there are more pics of me in the Yahoo Group than of you Luke!" "That's cause there are more ugly people in Canada to choose from!" "I am soooo going to beat your ass till it turns red, white, and blue when we finish here!" "Speaking of asses Ty." "People would give more than $10.00 U.S. each if you let my brother Derek pop your cherry!" "Hehe hehe. ummm, sorry again readers! Go and enjoy the chapter below and please give to help keep Nifty running! All the guys on the Dragons, the people at Ciccone's Trattoria, and the Anderson family thank you for making a small contribution! Even if you read this story in the year 2008 or 2020 your help is still needed!" "It's the beats for you LUCAS!" The Road Home: Part Twenty-Three (Thanksgiving Day) Tyler woke to the vibrations of his cell phone under his pillow. He opened his eyes and looked around, confused as to where he was. Kyle was drooling on Tyler's chest with his right arm wrapped around him. Abbey was on the other side of him stretched out. As soon Tyler moved Abbey's tail began wagging and she opened her eyes to look at Tyler. "Morning, girl!" Tyler said reaching down to rub her belly. Tyler untangled himself from Kyle. He kissed Kyle's forehead and Kyle rolled over but didn't wake. Tyler sat on the edge of the bed and put on his sweats and running shoes. He grabbed his mp3 player and a squeeze bottle of water. He stopped in the main bathroom to fill the bottle up and then quietly walked down the hallway to the stairs. Abbey's leash was hanging on the doorknob of the front door. As soon as he grabbed her leash Abbey began to get excited. He unlocked and opened the door and she ran outside to pee. It was so cold outside that he could see his breath. Tyler began stretching on the front steps while Abbey continued doing her business. Exactly one minute after opening the door the alarm went off. "OH, FUCK!" Tyler yelled as he opened the front door and came back inside looking for the alarm panel he had seen Derek program the night before. Larry yelled down from the stairway, "1234 enter!" It took Tyler three tries but he got it and all was quiet again. "Oh God, I'm so sorry Dr. Anderson!" Tyler apologized profusely. Larry laughed at him. "It's okay Tyler. not like it's my only morning to sleep in!" He joked. "I'm really sorry! I didn't know or well. think about an alarm. I apologize, Sir." Tyler said. "Tyler, it's okay! No one told you, and you wouldn't have gotten far without knowing that you have to punch in 1234 again down at the road to open the gate!" Larry smiled. "It's my fault. You told me you were going for a run this morning." "I'm sorry, Sir. Please try to go back to sleep." Tyler smiled. "I'll be fine, Tyler. I'm usually up at this time anyway. Don't let Abbey lead you astray!" Tyler closed the door behind him and called Abbey over to put her leash on. He programmed to his Blues Travelers "Run Around" and "All For You" on repeat play and they were off to the gates. They ran about four blocks until they came up to the streetlight and Abbey picked up a scent on a telephone pole. She had to mark the pole. After running for about 40 minutes they came to a park where Tyler stopped to let Abbey rest. Tyler directed Abbey on the route towards Casey's house. When he approached the area he slowed down and walked Abbey for several blocks trying to locate the street he lived on. Tyler found two ladies sitting at a bus stop and asked them for directions to Maple Street. He was in the area but on the wrong side of the road. A quick eight-block jog with a now tiring Abbey led him to Casey's street. It was tough for him to pick out the house because of the disrepair of many of the houses but the sloping, broken front steps jogged his memory. He stopped in front of Casey's house and unstrapped his bottle of water for Abbey. As he slowly poured the water into a cupped hand, Abbey lapped up all of its contents. While Abbey drank up he scanned the house for any signs of life. The note he wrote was still on the door. "C'mon girl, let's go home!" Tyler said as he scratched behind her ears. Tyler resealed the empty bottle and strapped it back on. Now that Abbey was refreshed and refuelled she had no desire to jog anymore, but rather to mark every pole, shrub, and mailbox. She also had to check out several dogs on the way home. As much as Tyler tried to get her to run, Abbey was checking out every square inch of property they passed. It was after eight in the morning when they arrived back. "You're home!" Linda said peeking out from the dining room upon hearing the door open. "Yeah, we had to check every out every dog, telephone pole, and mailbox, didn't we girl?" Tyler said petting her as he unhooked her leash. Abbey trotted off to her water and food bowls. She finished the contents and went to her seat on the sofa for a well-deserved nap. "We were getting worried about you. I was going to wake up Derek and get your cell phone and call you but I saw you left it sitting on Kyle's bed." Linda said as she worked on the place settings for dinner. "We were fine! Abbey could sniff her way home if we got lost! Next time I will bring two bottles of water though so I can have some!" Tyler laughed. "Wow! This is a really nice spread you've set up!" "Thank you, Tyler." Linda said. "Larry's parents will be arriving this afternoon and I think we will have dinner around five." "Are they staying the night?" Tyler asked. "We never know." Linda said. "If the weather is bad they will be." "If you want I can change Derek's bed for them. Derek and I can sleep in Kyle's room and Kyle probably wouldn't mind sleeping with Luke and Casey." Tyler suggested. "Thanks, Tyler. We usually give Michael and Mary our bedroom, but if you wouldn't mind getting Derek up. There's a lot to do today besides watching football!" Linda laughed. "Yes Ma'am. I will get him up and we will get his room in order! I think I will have a shower first, though." Tyler said leaving the dining room to go into the kitchen. "Morning, Tyler!" Larry said. "Good morning, Sir! Happy Thanksgiving Day!" Tyler said. "You too, Tyler! How did your run go?" Larry asked. "Run really isn't the word for it. more like walk from pole to pole." Tyler laughed and so did Larry. Tyler got himself a mug of coffee. "Are you hungry?" Larry asked. "Starved!!!" Tyler exclaimed. "Good! I'm working on a nice greasy breakfast! It should be ready in half an hour. By the way, there's something in that Tupperware container over there for you!" Larry said pointing back to the counter. Tyler walked over and opened the container and began laughing. "So you've heard?" Tyler asked. "Derek said that you always buy cinnamon buns for everyone and rarely get to eat any yourself. Derek went out and bought some yesterday for you." Larry said. Tyler fixed a second mug of coffee and placed three cinnamon buns on a plate. He left with the two mugs of coffee and buns saying, "I'll be back after my shower!" Tyler crept back into Derek's room and placed the mugs of coffee and cinnamon buns on the night stand next to Derek's bed. Derek was lying on his stomach half uncovered. Tyler stopped and stared at Derek's back and the part of his boxers that were showing. "You are so sexy, Mr. Anderson!" He said quietly. He stripped down naked and grabbed one bun and his coffee and headed into the bathroom for his shower. He soaped up his body and crotch, gently tugging at the skin between his balls. He ow would twist it around and release. Tyler could feel his girth increase. When he was at full mast he pulled his foreskin ahead and twisted it back and forth. Beyond the wonderful sensation he felt, it made his balls pull up tighter and as the skin wrinkled they told him 'we need to be scratched!' And he did! Tyler played with one nipple hoping to heighten the sensation but that only ever worked for him when it was someone else's touch. His erection was now so hard that it looked up at him. He slowly pulled it down to where it faced the showerhead. He loved to force his cock downward to that fine line between pleasure and pain when he orgasmed. It had been so long since he had been alone in a shower to just close his eyes and use his imagination. Internet pics were good, someone else's touch was better, but there was something about being alone and allowing your mind to take you to new places. Derek's back was the current trip he was taking. Tyler never really understood the need to be inside someone else. He never liked being on top of someone fucking because the feeling wasn't natural to him until now. For the first time in his life he wanted to be inside of someone. Derek to be exact! He wanted to stare deep into his eyes as he released his load. Tyler opened his eyes and looked down at his cock as he pulled back the foreskin. His head was turning deep purple. He turned around so that the showerhead was spraying on his back. Spreading his legs slightly he brought his left hand around behind and began fingering himself. Not even the entire fingernail of his middle finger was going all the way in but the sensations were good! Very good! He paused and slid the frosted glass shower door open to see if he was being watched. "Good! I'm alone" he thought. He caught his own reflection in the mirror and laughed. Slightly bent down and leaning forward with one hand on his cock and the other stuck in his butt. "Definitely NOT a Kodak moment" he thought! Closing his eyes and bending his head back he saw Derek beneath him in his mind. His eyes captivated Tyler. Tyler wondered if that secret spot really existed that would make a partner convulse into repetitive orgasms without touching himself. Though he hadn't kissed a lot of males or females he knew that feeling when he touched Derek's lips. The few kisses they had shared seemed to make everything around him unimportant. If Derek were to kiss him at the dinner table that night he knew the odds were strong that he would push the food off the table and onto the floor and take Derek right there on the dinner table in front of everyone. Tyler woke from his dream laughing out loud. "Shit! Wouldn't that be funny?" He said out loud. Placing his left hand back against the wall in front of him he spread his legs so he could feel the warm water flow over his bud. Grabbing his member he began stroking as he visualized Derek under him. He pumped slowly in and out of Derek. His foreskin never moved inside of him but his cock did! He clamped his hand tight as if Derek had flexed his sphincter muscle around him. Only seconds from that feeling of his cum beginning to ride up the inside of his shaft, he closed his eyes tight and thought of Derek's face clenching from his own orgasm. That feeling came fast and furious. Tyler shot so hard at the wet tile in front of him that it just stuck to the wall. He opened his eyes to watch the rest come out and fall into the flowing water below. Another painful and exhausting orgasm he thought. Oh, how he had needed that release. He slapped his hard member a couple of times saying, "C'mon, snap out of it! I've got stuff to do today!" but his cock felt like he had sprained it and it would never go down. Tyler carefully cleaned his foreskin and then pointed the showerhead towards the wall to remove all evidence. He put a little shampoo in his hand and rubbed it on the wall to clean any residue. By this time, his not-so-little friend was relaxing to a point where he could walk out of the shower. Tyler dried himself off inside the shower and then laid the towel out on the floor so when he stepped out he could dry his feet. He brushed his teeth and shaved at one of the two sinks. His one eye now looked more like he didn't get enough sleep rather than having been punched by his roommate. He applied more of the cream that Andrew had given him. Wrapped up in his bath towel he opened the bathroom door to Derek's room. "Thanks for the cinnamon bun and coffee." Derek said sitting on the side of the bed looking away. "You're welcome. Thank you for thinking of me and buying them!" Tyler said grabbing his deodorant. "It wasn't anything. Dad actually paid for it." Derek said. "Can we talk for a bit?" "Not now. Breakfast is almost ready and there are some people coming over about Casey this morning, but if you eat quickly maybe we can get some time in between?" Tyler said. Tyler dressed up in a button-down navy blue and yellow striped shirt with his cargos and brown dress shoes. He wanted to appear professional for when the person from Child Protection Services arrived. "Why are you dressed up?" Derek asked. "Remember I told you about the people coming about Casey? I want to look professional and you should, too!" Tyler said. "By the way, thanks for last night with Casey! You really made him feel special!" Tyler smiled. "It was nothing. He's a nice kid!" Derek said brushing the compliment off. "Yes, he is a nice kid, and you knew that it was important to me and you helped without me having to ask! That says a lot about you. Now hurry up!" Tyler said walking through the bathroom to wake Kyle up. "Morning, not so little dude!" Tyler said kissing the back of his head. Kyle raised his head from the pillow. "Morning.." Kyle said rolling over. "Pew! Morning breath, not so little dude!" Tyler said fanning the air around him. Kyle laughed and breathed on him again. "Get up and get ready for breakfast and can you dress up a little?" Tyler asked. "Why?" "Cause we have some people coming over about Casey and we need to put on a good face. and some clean breath." Tyler winked, kissed him and left the room. When Tyler entered Luke's bedroom he found they were both gone! As he entered the kitchen he saw the `Toon Network' on the TV and knew they were both watching. He slipped behind the sofa and leaned down and kissed the tops of each of their heads. "Morning, guys! Sleep well?" Tyler asked. "Yeah, great Ty!" Casey said. "Mango woke me up in the night but it was okay." Luke said more interested in the TV. "Give me your glasses and I will refill them with orange juice." Tyler asked. Tyler went back into the kitchen and refilled their glasses. "You're all dressed up this morning Tyler!" Larry said. "Yes Sir, with the company coming I thought I should be. I have a bad feeling about these people!" Tyler said putting the orange juice back in the fridge. "You think my parents are bad?" Larry queried. "Gosh no, Sir! I meant the people from the child protection service!" Tyler said shaking his head. "Oh! Sorry! I forgot about them." Larry laughed. "My mistake." "Sir, what happens if they decide to take Casey away today?" Tyler asked quietly and then walked away to give the boys their drinks. "I'm sure that won't happen, Tyler. I have many friends at the Police station and at CPS!" Larry said. "But if they do?" Tyler asked. "If they do, I will bring the house down upon them! Besides I have a couple of aces up my sleeve that I can pull out if necessary!" Larry winked. "Dr. Anderson, it's not my house and I am but a guest here, but I'm not letting Casey miss out on a real Thanksgiving Day! I have an opinion about his Mother but that is irrelevant. I might even be concerned if they send him back to her, but he should be allowed to be a kid while he still can be. One day everything can be gone in a flash." Tyler said walking over to the coffee machine. "Tyler, he isn't leaving this house this weekend unless his Mother shows up! Even then I am sure that Linda would invite his Mother and her boyfriend to stay for dinner and even let us keep him for the weekend." Larry said stirring up the home fries in the pan. "We owe you some money too! You are not paying for all those clothes! I saw what you did for Luke's hockey practice. You can't be spending that kind of money and make it through school, Tyler!" "I have lots of money, Sir. I was given a big inheritance and I am very careful with it. Outside of school expenses, all the money I've spent doesn't even add up to half of what I've made working at the restaurant. I do spend on those that I care about, but that is all. When I heard about how bad the team practices have been I wanted to do something to inspire them to work as a team. I hate hockey and I especially hated hockey practices! I hate playing the game! I hate most of the parents of the kids who do play!" Tyler said with a clenched fist. "What makes you play something that you ummm. hate so much?" Larry asked. "It's a really complicated answer and hard to explain. Growing up I had friends that got grounded or didn't get to eat dinner if they didn't score a goal! Everyone was always angry with someone. Parents hated the Coach's who in turn hated some or most of the players. Parents of hockey players should be banned completely!" Tyler said looking seriously at Dr. Anderson who laughed at his comment. "I understand what you are saying, Tyler, but I don't think either of us will live to see it happen!" Larry said. "Sir, I didn't accept a hockey scholarship. I got my scholarship for my scholastic abilities! I don't mean to sound like a snob but sports scholarships are for people with big egos, big dreams, and not much else of a future and I wasn't directing that at Derek!" Tyler said. "I know you weren't, Tyler! I think I understand you but I don't agree with you and you're not the only one who was against Derek's scholarship. I would love to see him play in the NFL but I would rather he got an education. Don't forget that there are many deserving, intelligent people who wouldn't have their education if it wasn't for a sports scholarship, so don't pre-judge every sport by hockey!" Larry said. "Yes, Sir." Tyler said setting the plates down in a row along the counter. "Tyler, it's okay to disagree with me and I never actually said I didn't agree with you but don't let my age be a factor. Stand up for what you believe in but be open to input from those around you." Larry said smiling at him. Derek walked into the room wearing a solid navy blue shirt and grey dress pants with black shoes on. "Shit, Derek! Did someone die?" Larry joked. "So Tyler, you didn't tell me why you are still playing hockey?" "My not accepting the scholarship worked for everyone but me. The athletics department made a deal with the Engineering department. I play hockey or at least give it a try and they get to bring in one more scholarship. In exchange, the Engineering department gets some extra funds out of the athletic department's budget next year. I got to escape from my world for a while and come down here so everyone is happy, I guess. I'm getting honours and playing hockey so they are all happy!" Tyler said setting out the cutlery. "Dad he's already quit the team once this year and the entire teamed begged him to come back!" Derek smiled. "Derek! Shut up. please!" Tyler glared at him. "Guys, how do you want your eggs? Derek, would you start making toast please." Larry asked. "Want to try something different, Dr. Anderson?" Tyler asked. "Take over, Tyler! I know it's got to be better than anything I can make!" Larry laughed and went and poured himself a coffee and sat down to watch Chef Tyler. Tyler pulled out a large skillet and turned the oven on to broil. He whipped up a dozen eggs and added sour cream, salt and pepper, chopped onion and red pepper, and then added 10 tablespoons of biscuit mix. Larry and Derek looked at each other. Tyler heated the pan and then chopped up some broccoli and chives and threw them into the mixture. Finally he pulled out cheddar and feta cheeses. "The Feta is the secret!" He said holding it up. Tyler poured the mixture into the greased pan and began cooking it on the stove just above medium. He shaved some sharp cheddar cheese all over it and then slowly mixed it in the pan. In about 10 minutes the mixture began to settle. Tyler crumbled the feta cheese all over the top of it. In another 10 minutes he removed it from the stove and put it in the oven to broil the top of it. Kyle came into the kitchen wearing a Rugby shirt and cargo pants with his hair neatly styled as always. "What smells so good?", he said walking in with his nose up in the air. "Derek had a shower!" Tyler said winking at Derek. "I can tell. go look at the bathroom!" Kyle teased, "But what smells so good?" "My broccoli, salmon, and liver casserole!" Tyler said. Larry and Derek started laughing. "Cool! I'll just have bacon, Dad!" Kyle said pouring himself a glass of chocolate milk. When Tyler's creation came out of the oven he sliced two pieces of his pie and put it on plates with bacon, sausages, home fries, and peanut buttered toast. He poured two glasses of chocolate milk and took them over to Luke and Casey. They both dug in and never mentioned wanting any more peanut butter. "Shit!" Larry said. "They're eating it without asking for peanut butter." "I would love to take credit for it but I think it's the DVD of "The Incredibles" that is doing it." Tyler said. Linda arrived and Derek and Tyler served everyone's plate. Derek and Tyler ate standing across from Larry, Kyle, and Linda. "Oh my God, Larry! This is incredible! What is that I taste?" Linda said. "It's the feta cheese! My little secret ingredient." Larry said. The three boys started laughing. "Of course! Tyler, this is great! Thank you so much! Larry, for lying you don't get to cook the turkey today!" Linda joked and Derek and Kyle cheered!!!!!! Tyler pretended not to get the joke and Larry smirked at her. "Speaking of! I better pop that sucker in the oven!" Linda said. Luke and Casey reappeared with empty plates. "Dad can we have more of your pie?" Everyone laughed and Tyler cut two more wedges. "Don't you guys want some peanut butter to go with it?" Tyler asked. "Nope!" Casey said. "No thanks!" Luke added. And they returned to their movie. Tyler was looking their way when he saw Luke hold up his arm from behind the sofa with an empty glass! Tyler opened the fridge and grabbed the chocolate milk and said, "Coming Master Luke!" And did his C-3PO walk towards them. "Who says white men can't dance?" Derek joked. "I'm not doing the robot Derek, well. actually I am I guess!" Tyler said continuing his funny walk towards them with stiff muscle movements. Kyle snorted chocolate milk through his nose. Tyler returned and quietly asked Linda in the kitchen if Casey knew anything about what was going on. She said she thought it was better not to say anything, as he would only be upset and worry. Derek signalled Tyler that he wanted to go elsewhere so they both excused themselves. They grabbed their coats and Derek led Tyler outside through the front door closing it quietly. The onset of winter was in the air, and only a few leaves still grasped hold of their trees. The morning sun could be seen but no longer felt once they turned the corner of the house by Tyler's Jeep. Pre-cut cedar and fruitwood logs lined the house from front to back. Derek lifted himself up on the logs and sat with his legs dangling in front of him. Tyler leaned against the pile beside Derek. They both stared at a large Maple tree in front of them, neither saying anything for a few moments. "That's my tree!" Derek declared. "Your tree? Like as in you pee on it or something?" Tyler asked. "Fuck off!" Derek laughed. "When I was mad or upset I would run away and climb up into that tree. I would take a couple of logs and lay them next to the fence and climb up the fence and step across to the lowest branch over there." Derek said pointing towards the tree. "You want a hand up here to sit on the logs?" "Nope. Not the way I am dressed and I don't want to get a sliver up my ass!" Tyler laughed and Derek smiled. "So climbing the tree with me is out of the question?" Derek joked. "Maybe later!" Tyler said tucking his hands into his coat pocket to stay warm. "Why do you love me?" Derek asked. "Why?" Tyler repeated. "Yeah. Why? I do everything possible to make you hate me but I know you love me almost as much as I love you." Derek said picking away at a piece of bark on a log beside him. "When I first met you, Derek, I was in love with you physically. Your eyes and smile drove me wild. I prayed that you would be someone special inside who might feel the same way I do. I tried to do things to make you attracted to me but that only made you angry with me so I tried staying out of your way to make you less angry. Neither one worked." Tyler said. "Yes they did, but continue." Derek said. "I remember in grade eleven history studying Hitler and my teacher said that there was a fine line between genius and insanity. I think I've come to realize that there is a fine line between love and hate as well! When you fall in love with someone and that person doesn't really know it, then even the smallest thing that person does can make you hate them. You create expectations of that person that are impossible for them to keep. I put too much pressure on the people I care about and end up getting hurt. and then angry with them when it isn't even their fault. I think I wanted you to be something that you aren't." "So I'm not what you want me to be?" Derek asked. "No! I think you are more than I ever could have imagined or dreamed of!" Tyler said. "You leave all of these clues. When I least expect it you go and do the most wonderful little things. I just hope you are doing them because you feel it inside and not because I want you too!" "My, what an ego you have Mr. Peel!" Derek laughed. Tyler turned and stared him down. "I was joking, Tyler!" "You brought me out here to make jokes?" Tyler asked. "No, sorry! I'm trying to understand what it is that you see in me. I have lots of people that like me for my body. I know the looks I get from girls and guys. I even play it up with them. You wouldn't believe how many guys I catch staring at me in the shower!" Derek pondered peeling more bark from the log beside him. "Yeah I would know. I'm one of them." Tyler said. "I know. I heard you this morning!" Derek smiled. "You heard me in the shower???" Tyler yelled. "Hahahaha! No, I heard you say that I was sexy, but please tell me about your shower?" Derek laughed and punched Tyler in the arm. Tyler didn't say anything and Derek said, "I was afraid that all you thought about me was that I was sexy and nothing else." "Is that why you treat people the way you do?" Tyler asked. "You figured it out, huh?" Derek asked. "I figured it out a long time ago. I was wondering when you would figure it out." Tyler smiled. "Just now! Maybe a while ago. It's not fun to have people love you for your body and nothing else." Derek said. "You never let anyone inside to love you for anything else." Tyler said. "It's a lot safer that way!" Derek said. "You're preaching to choir, Rev. Anderson!" Tyler added. "So, what do you see in me that you like?" Derek asked. "Nothing!" Tyler teased and winked at Derek. "Honestly! I haven't figured it all out yet. Every time I get a little information you go into attack mode. I see a lot of things that are really great and things that are very special to me. I know that asking me out here must have been very difficult for you to do and then asking me 'why I love you'? Well that's just taking your heart out and setting it on the floor wondering if I will pick it up and hold it or step on it and break it in two." Tyler said snapping a small stick of wood in half to emphasize his point. "No specifics, huh?" Derek asked laughing? "Derek. I love your beauty. I love your sense of humour. I love you when show all the love inside of you to others. Your kisses are better than any orgasm I've ever had! For a split second I was jealous of you and Kyle but only for a second. I never want you to feel you can only love one person! I think if you truly love someone you want to share what you have with everyone around you." Tyler said turning around and facing him. Tyler took both of Derek's hands into his. "So I can sleep around, huh?" Derek teased. "You can do anything you want, Derek. If you didn't want to be with me then I wouldn't want you to be with me. I just hope you want to be with me as much as I want to be with you." Tyler said staring into Derek's eyes. Derek leaned down to Tyler. Both of their heads tilted slightly as their lips met. As they pulled apart and smiled silently at each other, Derek said, "Tyler, there will always be a space saved for you in that tree!" Tyler laughed and said, "I was hoping you might say your bed but I get your point!" They heard the gate at the end of the driveway beginning to open and Derek jumped down. "Owwwww! Fuck!" Derek yelled. "What's the matter?" Tyler asked. "I got a sliver in my butt!" Derek said bent over pulling at the back of his pants. Tyler laughed and said, "No problem, your Mom will be able to pull it out! We better head back in through the garage so you're not seen like this." Tyler and Derek snuck around to the back of the house and entered the garage through the rear door. A plain clothes Police Officer and a lady got out of blue Ford Crown Victoria and walked up the steps to the Anderson's front door and rang the bell. Dr. Anderson answered the door. "Good Morning, Dr. Anderson. I'm Trooper Gavin O'Leary and this is Ms. Jennifer Coxwell from Child Protection Services. "Welcome, we've been expecting you!" Dr. Anderson said standing back and opening the door fully for them to enter. He led them into the living room and asked them to be seated while he went and got Linda in the kitchen. Ms. Coxwell was dressed in a grey business suit with her dark brown hair pulled back and tied into a tight bun. Her grey nylons and black shoes complimented her black purse and black briefcase that she stowed to one side of the chair. She wore designer glasses with a dark straight-framed top and transparent rim. Make-up was not a priority as Ms. Coxwell was certainly all business. She sat down on one of the two large white chairs that were placed on either side of the fireplace. Trooper O'Leary sat in the other white chair smiling at Ms. Coxwell without receiving a response in return. Dr. Anderson returned to the room with Linda who carried a tray with a decanter of coffee, pot of tea, cream, sugar, and an array of Royal Dolton coffee mugs. She set them down on the marble coffee table. Mr. O'Leary and Ms. Coxwell stood up as she entered the room. "Trooper O'Leary. Ms. Coxwell. May I introduce my wife, Linda." Larry said. Linda shook hands and exchange pleasantries with both of them and apologized for interrupting their Thanksgiving Day celebrations. Ms. Coxwell quickly cleared the air that she wasn't being interrupted in the slightest. Larry really wanted to say to Linda, 'left-wing, feminist lesbian at 11 o'clock' but decided it wasn't in Casey's best interest!' Larry and Linda sat down on the sofa opposite them. "Now Dr. and Mrs. Anderson," Ms. Coxwell began, "I understand that you have been keeping a Casey Mitchell here?" "Yes, Ms. Coxwell." Linda said. "And he came unto you by way of his hockey Coach?" She asked. "Not exactly. Perhaps you would allow me to explain it all in a shortened version?" Linda offered. Ms. Coxwell hooked her pen on her clipboard and adjusted her glasses. Linda carefully went through the details of the hockey practice with Larry's help as he was actually there. Linda explained Tyler's connection and his taking both boys out shopping because Casey had no clean clothing and what he was wearing was in a tattered condition at best! "Are all the boys here now?" Ms. Coxwell asked. "Yes!" Linda said. "Good, I would first like to meet with Tyler." She asked flipping through the notes she had made. Larry went up to Derek's bedroom and got Tyler. He also asked Derek to get the boys dressed up but not say anything to them about it. He further added that he wanted the boys kept away until he called for them. Larry returned with Tyler and introduced him. Tyler extended his hand but Ms. Coxwell just ignored it and scratched notes on her pad. "Mr. Tyler Peel." She began, "Can I have your Social Security number please!" Tyler looked at the Andersons. "Ms. Coxwell, Tyler doesn't have an SS number. He is Canadian." Larry said. "A foreigner was allowed to be alone with underage boys?" She asked removing her glasses with a dramatic flare. "Excuse me!" Tyler burst in. "I wasn't asking you, Mr. Peel!" Ms. Coxwell said. "What the Hell is going on here, Dr. Anderson?" Tyler asked still not sitting down. "I was about to ask the same question, Tyler!" Larry said. "Dr. Anderson, do you really think it is proper to have an immigrant left alone with children of such a young age?" Ms. Coxwell asked. "I know what the hell you are inferring, Ms. Coxwell, and if you have questions about me I suggest you ask them to me. I'm calling my lawyer!" Tyler said pulling out his cell phone. Linda pulled him down beside her and closed his phone. "Ms. Coxwell, I'd like a very clear explanation as to where your line of questioning is going right now! Trooper O'Leary, I would like you to be making notes also!" Larry said. "I have a job to do and that involves questioning all suspects involved!" Ms. Coxwell said flexing her position. "Ms. Coxwell. Tyler is not a suspect, as you like to refer to him nor is he on trial here. He owes you no explanation other than anything he wishes to divulge here! It is because of this boy that Casey isn't wandering the streets or even dead right now! As someone who knows a great deal of people in YOUR office and at the Police Station I suggest you stick to point here and that is Casey! For the record, Tyler was never alone with boys as the Assistant Coach was always there. In fact, I was there for most of it. Are we clear, Ms. Coxwell?" Larry said as the veins in his forehead began bulging. "Quite clear, Dr. Anderson! I think the environment here is quite hostile and I will take Casey with me right now!" Ms. Coxwell said standing up. "You will do no such thing, Ms. Coxwell!" Larry said. "You are free to continue asking relevant questions and to meet and interview Casey with myself and Trooper O'Leary present at all times! You can write whatever the hell you want in your report but that boy will not leave this house unless his mother shows up to get him! Do you know who John Rubenstein is?" "Yes, he is my boss's boss!" Ms. Coxwell said slightly on edge. "Very good, Ms. Coxwell! He is also my golf partner and long time friend. I can assure you that I know your boss, Helen Wilson as well! If you have any concerns about the welfare of Casey while he is in this household then I will happily let you use the phone in my office and you can call them both! If you have any concerns about Tyler's actions at the arena then I suggest you file a report and I will present the entire episode on video for your superiors to watch and decide for themselves! If you want to arrest myself or Tyler then I suggest you have Trooper O'Leary do so right now!" Larry fumed. "I don't think that will be necessary. at this point." Ms. Coxwell said. "Ms. Coxwell," Linda said, "We wouldn't have contacted your office if we didn't feel that there was a concern for Casey's welfare. It may turn out to be a misunderstanding but we feel that Casey is showing the signs of neglect. He may be undernourished and though Casey hasn't said anything directly there could be some sort of mental abuse from Ms. Mitchell's boyfriend. Casey did say that her boyfriend doesn't like him." "Perhaps I could meet with Casey now?" Ms. Coxwell asked. "Tyler, would you go and get him please?" Linda asked. Ms. Coxwell flinched, as she was about to say something but stopped when Larry glared at her. Tyler returned carrying Casey into the living room. "Casey," Tyler said, "I would like you to meet Ms. Coxwell. She's a really nice lady who would like to ask you some questions so try your best to answer them and always be honest!" Tyler set Casey down and left the room but not before giving Ms. Coxwell an evil stare. Casey sat down on Linda's lap. "Hi Casey, my name is Jennifer." She said. "This is Gavin. He's a police officer." Gavin smiled and shook hands with Casey. "Aren't you supposed to wear a hat and gun?" Casey asked. Gavin laughed. "Some days I do Casey, but this week I'm working on helping little boys find their Mom's!" Ms. Coxwell went through a series of carefully planned questions for Casey. She learned all about his toys, school, friends, hockey, and family. "Well thank you Casey. I appreciate your taking the time to talk to me." She smiled at him. "I just have a few more questions for you! Firstly, can you tell me how long you've known Tyler?" She asked. Larry and Linda looked at each other and then at Trooper O'Leary. "I met him yesterday at my hockey practice. He gave me some chocolate bars and brought me back here." Casey said. "Ms. Coxwell, is this necessary?" Trooper O'Leary asked. "Just a moment please!" She said glaring at the officer. "Did Tyler touch you in any unusual places?" Ms. Coxwell asked. "That's it! This is over!" Larry yelled! "Linda, take Casey up to play with Luke." Larry grabbed the phone and Ms. Coxwell stood up about to say something. "Don't move an inch or say a word!" Larry said dialling the phone. "Hello, John? Larry here, Happy Thanksgiving Day! I'm sorry to bother you but we have a problem here! We have a Ms. Jennifer Coxwell here about an abandoned boy and she has been making accusations about Derek's roommate from Drexel. She's threatened to take the boy and she has gone so far as to ask an eleven year old boy if he is being 'touched' inappropriately by a 19 year old who found him abandoned by his parents and brought him here." Larry said. "Uh huh. yeah. Yes we did. Trooper O'Leary is right here. Yes, he was present for everything. Just a moment. Trooper O'Leary, Mr John Rubenstein, head of CPS, would like to speak with you." Larry said handing the phone over to him. Trooper O'Leary took the phone. "Yes, Sir?" "Yes she did! No Sir, the boy did not have any legal representation here when she asked. Yes Sir, I would definitely say the young man has legal repercussions he could act on. She kept notes. Just a moment. Ms. Coxwell, may I have the notes you've written?" "No you may not! Those are the property of CPS!" She told him. "She has refused, Sir!", Trooper O'Leary told Mr. Rubenstein. "Uh Huh, I will tell her right now!" Trooper O'Leary said holding the phone away from his mouth. "You have two choices, Ms. Coxwell. You can turn them over to me immediately, or I will take you before a judge right now and Mr. Rubenstein wants to remind you that they are the property of CPS - not you!" Ms. Coxwell handed the notes to him. "I have them now, Sir! Yes, I will see that they are at your office tomorrow morning. Yes Sir, he's right here. Dr. Anderson, would you pick up on another line please. He wishes to speak to both of us." Larry left the room and picked up the phone in the kitchen. "Yes, John?" "Larry, I apologize for what has happened. She will be dealt with, I promise you! She's put our office in jeopardy by her accusations. Momentarily she will be relieved of her duties and I will strongly suggest she apologize to the young man! Please thank him for doing the right thing! Can I appoint you as temporary legal guardian, Larry?" John Rubenstein asked. "Of course, John. He's a sweet boy. I might not return him though!" Larry laughed and so did John and the Trooper. Ms. Coxwell fumed at hearing the Trooper laugh. "Larry, if the child's mother comes to get him then you must release him but I want you to phone me right away. Day or night! I want an officer to meet with her! We don't want to upset the child or create a problem for him. I will ask Helen to personally handle the case. Now if you both don't mind I would like to speak with Jennifer!" John said. "Just one more thing John, if it turns out that you are taking him out of his home would you let us have him until things are worked out? I think he would be more comfortable here with Luke and they both go to the same school!" Larry asked. "Larry, you keep making my job easier everyday! How many kids can I send over?" John laughed. "I will get off the phone. My apologies for bothering you, John." Larry said. "Larry, do not apologize! I owe you for calling me and if she doesn't apologize I want to know first thing tomorrow morning! Trooper O'Leary, I will need a full report from you of everything that took place by noon tomorrow if you can?" John asked. "Yes Sir! It will be my pleasure!" He said smiling. Larry hung up the phone and Trooper O'Leary handed the phone over to Ms. Coxwell. Larry went over to Tyler who was talking on his cell phone with his Uncle David. He had tears in his eyes. Larry gave him a hug. "Yeah, hold on a sec, Uncle David! Dr. Anderson is right here." Tyler said handing his cell phone to Larry. "My Uncle David, who is my lawyer, wanted to ask you a couple of questions. "Hello David! A fine nephew you have!" Larry began his conversation. Tyler stood listening to half of the conversation. "Tyler, would you go up and check on Luke and Casey please?" Tyler knew he was being sent away. "Look David, I didn't want to say anything in front of Tyler but this crazy woman even asked Casey if 'Tyler had touched him in any inappropriate ways'. No I stopped the interview right there and called her boss' boss! He happens to be a friend of mine. Yes, he knows of the legal ramifications as well. He's ordered her to apologize to Tyler. I don't think there is any need to create more of a scene than she has already done. I'm pretty sure she will be relieved of her duties! Yes, the officer was present through the entire interview and John asked him to have a report on his desk by noon tomorrow. I think it will all work out and if there is any further problems I will make sure you are aware of it immediately. Yes I know the firm!" Larry began to laugh out loud. "All right. Great! Nice to talk with you, too!" Larry said as he closed up Tyler's cell phone. "Ms. Coxwell, do you realize what harm you've just done to our department?" John screamed at her so loud she held the phone away from ear. Trooper O'Leary snickered. "You WILL apologize to that young man before you leave that house! You WILL never set foot on that property again! You WILL be in my office on Monday morning at 8 a.m.! You are relieved of your duties until that time and if you set foot on the CPS premises or have contact with any person's file currently under CPS, I will prosecute you to fullest extent of the law! If I have to deal with a lawsuit from that young man I promise that you will never work for this agency again! Have I made myself clear?" John yelled! "Yes, Sir!" Ms. Coxwell said visibly shaking now. Larry stood at the entrance way to the living room and Trooper O'Leary joined him in some small talk that Jennifer couldn't hear. She hung up the phone and grabbed her things. "Thank you for seeing me today, Dr. Anderson!", Ms Coxwell said coldly. "It was all your pleasure Ms. Coxwell, and for the record. Tyler gave every kid on the team chocolate bars!" Larry said with his arms crossed. "May I speak with Mr. Peel?", She asked. "I don't know but I will ask him. He just got off the phone with his Uncle, who is his lawyer. Are you familiar with the firm of Reynolds, White, Anderson and Taylor?" Larry asked. Ms. Coxwell nodded and her face became flush. "It seems that Greg Anderson roomed with David Peel for a year at Harvard Law School!" Larry said as he climbed the stairs to go get Tyler. Larry stopped halfway up the curved staircase and turned and said to Ms. Coxwell. "Remember that you have a couple of witnesses watching this conversation!" Larry and Tyler returned with Linda, Kyle, and Derek in tow. Tyler stopped at the bottom of the stairs with Larry beside him. "Mr. Peel. Tyler, if I may. I want to apologize for my insinuations made today. It is part of my job to investigate all parties involved. I am sorry!" Ms. Coxwell said and no one could really argue as to whether she was sincere or not. "Thank you Ms. Coxwell." Tyler said without emotion and turned to go up the stairs. Trooper O'Leary called out, "Tyler. Thank you for helping Casey! The world needs more people like you!" He smiled and shook Larry's hand and winked at him. Ms. Coxwell turned and headed out the door with Trooper O'Leary in tow. Tyler ran into the bathroom and slammed the door shut. He sat down on the steps of the hot tub and started crying. Linda started to go after him but Derek stopped her and said he would handle it. Linda looked at Larry and he nodded. Derek tapped on the bathroom door, opened it, and went inside closing the door behind him. Derek pulled Tyler into his chest and let him cry. Tyler tried to say something but Derek wouldn't let him. "Tyler you're not alone, and I will never let you be alone again! I want you to know that you are safe with me and my family." Derek said and Tyler squeezed him tight. "Well. if you're naked and Kyle's around I can't be responsible for that!" Derek teased. Tyler laughed a little between tears. "Ty, you did nothing wrong and everything right! As usual! Even the cop complimented you right in front of that bitch! She probably just hates all men and you happened to cross her path! Now please stop crying because there really isn't anything to cry about. Dad will take care of her, and good!" Derek said rubbing his back. "C'mon, let's get you cleaned up and. do you think you could do me a little favour?" Derek asked. "What?" Tyler asked. "Could you take the sliver out of my ass for me?" Derek laughed and Tyler joined in. When both got cleaned up and opened the bathroom door the entire family was standing in the hall. Tyler jumped back at the sight. Casey ran up to him and threw his arms around him. "Thanks, Tyler!" was all he said. "Anything for you, Casey!" Tyler said holding him tight. The rest of the family joined in for one big group hug! "Break it up people!!!" Derek said trapped inside the bathroom. "You can all watch 7th Heaven on WB on Monday nights!" Tyler turned and said, "I think somebody needs a hug!!!" Everyone laughed and encircled Derek. "Ty! I'm going to have Dad deep-fry you!" Derek said. Linda cuffed him upside of the head. "Tyler, we all love you very much! Don't let her get to you! All that really matters here is what Casey feels and that he has a good home!" Linda said wrapping her arms around Casey. "Okay people!" Larry said, "We've got a meal to get ready and I don't know about anyone else but I want some lunch. and maybe some pecan pie!" The crowd dispersed and everyone went downstairs to get something to eat. Larry pulled Tyler aside into the living room and signalled for Linda to join him. "Derek, will you make sure the boys all get something to eat! There's lasagne ready in the oven and garlic bread!" Linda said. "I wanted to talk with you alone for a moment." Larry said as Linda closed the French doors to the room and joined them. "I want to apologize for what happened this morning. We had no idea that the person sent over would act that way and I can assure that I will personally make sure that steps are taken to make sure that it will never happen again to you or anyone else!" Linda sat down on the arm of the chair that Tyler was in and put her hand on his back. "Sir, there is no need to apologize. While I am offended at the accusation I also understand that she was doing her job!" Tyler said not looking at either of them. "No Tyler! She wasn't doing her job! That was what is known as an initial consultation or fact-finding mission. She had no right to question Casey in the manner that she did without Casey having proper legal representation to protect his rights! If it turns out that Casey is being abused or neglected her actions could hinder helping Casey! This is all irrelevant at the moment. Linda and I want you to know that we trust you and have grown to love you very much. If you haven't figured it out already, you are a part of our family, and a wanted part of our family! We hope that you will chose to make this your second home!" Larry said smiling at Tyler. "Thank you Sir and you too, Mrs. Anderson!" Tyler said. "I can't even begin to tell you how wonderful it is to be included here. I just hope I never let you down or disappoint you." Tyler said wiping a tear before it appeared. "Tyler, you don't need our approval for us to love you! It's okay if you feel that you let us down. You're still just a boy and we are here to help you back up if you fall down! Larry and I try to be good at mind reading but sometimes we're a little deaf, so you might have to open up a little bit and yell or scream to get our attention! Once you do, though, you will find that we will be there for you as we would be for our other three boys!" Linda said. "Tyler, do you think it is possible for you do draw another family picture for us sometime in the future?" Larry asked. "Yes Sir. It might not be until after I finish exams though." Tyler said. "Good, because we have a problem with the one that you did!" Larry said. "Sir?" Tyler said looking upset at there being a problem with it. "What did I do wrong?" "You forgot to include our fourth son." Linda said kissing him on top of the head. The tears ducts couldn't hold back any longer after Linda's words. Larry came around the other side and they had a three-way hug. "I love you both so much and I don't deserve it." Tyler said through his tears. Larry looked up at Linda and furrowed his brow. "Tyler, everyone deserves to be loved!" Larry said. "Let's get some lunch!" Larry said standing up. Linda signalled for him to leave. When Larry walked into the kitchen three of the four boys were eating. "Everything okay Dad?" Derek asked. "Yes, everything is fine. Your Mom needs some time to play Mommie!" Larry winked. "Should I go rescue him?" Derek asked but Larry just shook his head, implying no. "You should eat now Derek. You don't want to spoil your dinner tonight!" Larry said. "I will Dad, but I wanted to wait for Tyler." He said. Larry smiled and ruffled his hair. Just as Tyler and Linda entered the kitchen the buzzer sounded, telling them someone was at the gate. "Sounds like Mom and Dad are here!" Larry sighed. Tyler looked at Derek trying to get a read on the happiness factor. Derek glared back as to say 'don't go there'! Larry punched in the code for the gate to open. While Linda and Larry left to meet his parents, Tyler and Derek filled up plates with lasagne. "What's up with your Dad and Grandfather?" Tyler asked. "They don't get along. Grandpa is always comparing Dad with my Uncle Ted." Derek said. "Grandpa has spoiled every Thanksgiving for us since I can remember! I don't know why Dad puts up with Grandpa's shit! I just wish he would die!" "Isn't that a little harsh?" Tyler said defending Grandpa. "Wait and decide for yourself! He belongs with a woman like Ms. Coxwell." Derek said "What's so special about your Uncle Ted?" Tyler asked. "Nothing. he's a loser and has never really accomplished much of anything. Mom thinks Grandpa feels sorry for Uncle Ted and takes it out on Dad. I don't even like my cousins. Zach is stuck up!" Derek said eating a piece of garlic bread. "Sounds like the two of you would have a lot in common!" Tyler joked. "Michael! Mary! Happy Thanksgiving Day! How was your trip?" Linda said hugging each of them as they got out of their Lincoln Continental Town Car. "Heavy traffic! Bad weather is headed this way!" Michael complained "Hi Mom! Dad." Larry said. "I see you brought your luggage." "Just in case the weather is too bad to get home tonight, dear!" Mary said. "I told Michael that we should stay in a hotel." "Our boy has lots of money and space! He can put his parents up for one or two nights!" Michael announced. Larry glared at Linda as he loaded himself up with four suitcases. "Linda, would you call one of the boys to give me a hand please." Larry asked. "Getting weak in your old age, Larry?" Michael said. Derek came running out followed by Kyle, Luke, and Casey. "Hi Grandma!" Derek said as he kissed her cheek and grabbed the two heavier bags from Larry to carry inside. "No hug for your Grandpa?" Michael asked of Derek while Kyle and Luke smothered Grandma with hugs and kisses. "No Sir! I'm busy carrying your bags!" Derek growled. "Dad just leave those. You shouldn't be carrying this stuff! You work hard enough all week long!" Derek said grinning at his father so Michael couldn't see him. "Kyle! Come over here and help me!" Derek yelled. Derek and Kyle grabbed all the bags and took them into the house. Michael pulled Larry aside and said, "That boy of yours has a bad attitude! You better straighten him out before it's too late! He's still got that gay thing in his ear too!" Larry just ignored his father and bit his tongue as always. "Lucas!" Grandpa yelled and Luke came running into Grandpa's arms. "How's my favourite grandson?" Kyle looked up at his mother from hearing Grandpa's comment. Linda smiled and winked at Kyle. "Great Grandpa! This is my friend Casey! He's staying with us for a while." Luke said introducing Casey. "I see your Dad has enough money to take in strays." Grandpa said shaking Casey's hands. Casey looked at Luke and they both shook their shoulders not understanding what Michael meant. "Why don't you boys go on inside!" Linda said. Mary and Linda walked arm in arm up into the house with Larry and Michael following. "You should trim those fruit trees before winter Larry!" Michael said. "There are cutters in the garage and you'll also find a ladder there too. go crazy Dad!" Larry said walking off ahead of his father. Larry joined his mother and Linda in the kitchen. Tyler was cleaning up the lunch mess and doing dishes in the sink. "Mary, this is Tyler, Derek's roommate at University." Linda said. Tyler quickly wiped his hands on a dishtowel and threw it over one shoulder. He reached out to shake hands with Mrs. Anderson. "Pleasure to meet you Ma'am! Happy Thanksgiving Day!" He said smiling. "And it's a pleasure to meet you, Tyler! We've heard so much about you." Mary said smiling. Michael came into the kitchen and stopped when he saw Tyler. Tyler extended his hand to Mr. Anderson and said smiling, "Tyler Peel, Sir. Pleasure to meet you." Michael stuck his hand out and said, "Tyler!" Showing no emotion at all. He turned and said to Larry, "I see you've got yourself a maid! Must be nice to be rich enough to afford all this hired help!" Tyler pulled his hand back and looked around at everyone in the room waiting for someone to say something. "I better finish the dishes Masta!" Tyler said in a Southern Black American accent. He stuck his hand in the dishwater and began singing, "Sweet Low.. Sweet Chariot.." Derek burst out laughing and Larry joined in. "Michael! You behave yourself!" Mary taunted him. "You know damn well that Derek's roommate from college was going to be here!" Derek wasn't about to miss taking a shot at his Grandfather. "I apologize, Tyler. I should have warned you about my Grandfather!" He said loud enough for everyone to hear while staring down his Grandfather. Linda looked at Larry and vice versa. Neither knew what to do or say since they couldn't really argue with Derek and both secretly wished that they had said it. "Give me the towel, I will help you dry. How does that song go again?" Derek said smiling at Tyler. "Michael! We need to get changed from our drive. COME WITH ME!" Mary said not waiting for him to answer. Grandpa followed her upstairs to Larry and Linda's bedroom. When they left room Derek was the first to speak. "Don't either of you say a word! He was rude! He is always rude and I may have to take his shit but Tyler doesn't!" Linda and Larry looked at each other again. "Derek. It's okay. You did what was right standing up for yourself. He's a cranky old man. Linda and I have had enough ruined Thanksgiving days with him! This is the last time we are putting up with his shit!" Larry said. "Larry, don't do something stupid." Linda warned him. "Why not? He's always said I was stupid and bull headed!" Larry smiled. "Linda, he's insulted Casey, Tyler, Derek, Kyle and me! You're next and you know it, but that won't be until he picks apart his meal. We don't have to take this abuse. We teach our kids to stand up for themselves and if I don't stand up to him how can our boys ever believe anything we tell them?" "Michael! What in God's name do you think you're doing?" Mary said. "You ruin every Thanksgiving! I will not tolerate this anymore!" "I've done nothing wrong it's that son of yours." Michael yelled back to his wife. "Keep your voice down and don't you ever talk back to me again! I let you act like a jackass most of the time but if you ever insult my grandchildren again, you'll sleep in an empty bed until the Devil calls your name! Say one word, just one word to me right now and you can get in your damn car and get the Hell out of here for good! How dare you say that Luke is your favourite grandchild?" Mary yelled back. Mary walked out of the bedroom and slammed the door shut behind her. When she walked into the kitchen everyone froze in silence. "Mrs. Anderson, I made some tea. Would you like a cup to help you relax with after your long ride?" Tyler asked with a gentle smile. "Why thank you, Tyler!" Mary smiled. "Can you put a shot of JD in it for me?" She winked. "Yes Ma'am! I'll make it a double!" Tyler joked. "How about a nice slice of pecan pie to go with it?" "Oh, thank you Tyler, but I don't think I'm going to eat now with one of Linda's delicious meals happening tonight!" Mary said. "Well, Dr. and Mrs. Anderson were going to have some so I could cut a tiny widdle wun for you?" Tyler said holding his thumb and index finger together. Larry and Linda looked at Tyler wondering when they ever said they were going to have some. "Well, if Larry and Linda are going to have some." Mary said. Linda stepped in and smiled at Tyler realizing what he was doing. "You go ahead, Tyler, and I will cut the pie." Linda said. "What does Mr. Anderson prefer? Coffee or tea?" Tyler asked. "Scotch!" Larry said laughing. "Dr. Anderson would you mind pouring one for your father and I will take it up to him!" Tyler smiled. Larry didn't know what Tyler's plan was but he didn't feel like questioning him so he went to the bar and poured a Scotch for Tyler. Tyler left the Great Room and headed upstairs. As he arrived at the top of the curved staircase Derek was walking down the hall from his bedroom. He saw Tyler knocking on his parents bedroom door and did an about face running back to his room. "YES!" Came the thunderous voice of Michael Anderson. "Sir, It's Tyler! May I come in?" He asked. There was no answer so Tyler opened the door and entered slowly in fear that something might come flying at him. Michael was sitting on the corner of the bed with his shirt off. "I brought you a drink to help you relax from your drive, Sir." Tyler smiled as he handed Michael his Scotch. Michael turned his head cracking his neck. "Why don't you come and sit over here Mr. Anderson? This chair will be much better!" Tyler said. Michael got up and sat down in one of the two chairs that overlook the living room. Tyler got behind his chair and said, "Now just relax and close your eyes, Sir!" Upon saying that, Tyler gently placed both hands on each of his shoulders and began kneading the muscles next to the neck. Michael was almost about to protest until he realized how good it felt. "You're very tense, Sir. must be from that long drive in the bad weather." Tyler said but Michael didn't respond, he only moaned from the pleasure of his massage. Tyler continued his massage pushing Michael to lean forward so that he could go lower down his back. "Now Sir, I want you to sit still and just relax. Sip on your drink. I need to get some towels and cream so we don't burn your skin!" Tyler said as he got up and left the room heading to the main bathroom. He got three large bath towels and took the bottle of St. Ive's skin cream back to the bedroom. The sound of the door closing woke Michael from his slumber. Tyler laid one towel out open on the bed and used the other two as props to elevate Michael's body. "Now Sir if you will come with me?" Tyler said and Michael got up slightly delusional from his massage. "Sir, I need to ask you to remove your pants so I don't get any of this body cream on them. We wouldn't want to have to explain this to Mrs. Anderson!" Tyler winked and Michael actually smiled knowing that Tyler wasn't going to embarrass him about the massage. "Tyler, I appreciate your not.." Michael started to say "Sir! There is nothing happening here to be discussed anywhere or with anyone!" Tyler said and Michael smiled. "What are all the towels for?" Michael asked as he lay down on the bed the way Tyler instructed him. Tyler climbed on top of Michael and sat on his butt. He squirted the cream all over Michael's back and then leaned down close to his ear as he began to work the cream in. "Mr. Anderson, the towels are positioned so that you are not only comfortable but they prevent any accidents happening that would be noticed!" "Accidents?" Michael asked. "Yes Sir. It wouldn't be unusual for someone to have an orgasm from a massage. In fact, I would be more worried if you don't have one! With all the towels properly in place, I will be able to leave the room when I am done and you will have your privacy and no one will ever be the wiser! Now sip your drink, close your eyes, and relax! I only need to hear from you if it hurts. in a bad way!" Tyler said and Michael chuckled. Tyler worked his way up and down Michael's back, over his shoulders and down his arms. Michael continued to moan his approval and his excitement. Tyler would occasionally move his hands back up to Michael's neck grinding his own crotch into Michaels butt. Tyler could feel every time Michael moved his butt. He slowly worked his way down to his butt. Tyler lifted himself up and said, "Sir, I am going to lower your boxers now. Just relax and kindly lift you butt so I don't. umm. snag anything?" He said. Michael sighed and gave a small giggle as he lifted his butt up in the air. Tyler reached around and under the front of Michael removing sliding his boxers down while copping a quick feel of Mr. Anderson's fully erect member! He wasn't doing it for the feel but rather so he could tell Derek one day! "Oh, that feels so much better Tyler." Michael said laying his head to one side. "Yes Sir! My goal is make you feel better." Tyler said as he massaged his butt. Michael began thrusting his hips gently and then stopped when he realized what he was doing. "Don't stop Sir! That is helping relax the muscles!" Tyler said. Michael decided to toss the ball and see if it got caught. "I think I'm going to have 'bed burn' if I don't stop Tyler!" He chuckled. "I think I can help you with that problem, Sir, if you like?" Tyler said, returning serve! Michael moaned. The bottle made loud farting sounds as he squeezed some cream into his right hand. "Sir, if you would lift up for just a moment!" Michael lifted his ass up and Tyler slipped his hand underneath gently coating Michael's erect penis. Tyler kept his hand there sliding it up and down to make sure it was fully coated. He pressed down on Michael's butt to let him know it was okay to relax with his hand still there. Michael moaned. Tyler used the cream in his left hand to run it over his butt and crack. Michael moaned more. Tyler pulled Michael's member over to the side so it was sticking out and Michael rolled a little to his left to give Tyler better access. Tyler began fisting him gently and Michael's breath began to take shorter, heavier gasps. Tyler's fingers began prodding at his hole putting gentle pressure. Tyler stopped and grabbed Michael's Scotch just before it went over the edge. "Good save, Tyler!" Michael laughed. "Thank you Sir! My apologies, I should have been watching it closer." Tyler said and he continued rubbing Michael's penis. "Tyler, I think the Scotch is my concern, not yours!" Michael said. Tyler returned his finger to Michael's butt and for the first time Michael opened his ass to welcome Tyler's finger. Tyler didn't want to push his luck here so he only put pressure on his ring. Michael moaned 'Oh God' and Tyler knew he was close. Tyler moved his left hand down to Michael's exposed balls and began tweaking the skin. He tightened his grip and Michael's orgasm began. Tyler could feel Michael's balls pull up and he took longer and faster strokes for about five seconds and then slowed down to a stop with the end of Michael's orgasm. "Better Sir?" Tyler asked as he returned to massaging Michael's neck! "Much better, Tyler! I haven't felt this good in years!" Michael said. "Good Sir! I know that as the patriarch of this family you need to be in top form!" Tyler said. "Are you taking me somewhere, Tyler?" Michael asked. "Sir?" Tyler responded. "You're not a stupid boy Tyler, and don't assume I am a stupid old man!" Michael said. "Can I be blunt, Mr. Anderson?" Tyler asked. "Yes, but I really think we've crossed the line of you having to call me Sir or Mr.!" Michael joked. "Yes Sir, but it is simply out of respect and as far as anyone else is concerned nothing has changed, has it?" Tyler said. "You really are a smart boy Tyler, maybe some of that will rub off on my Grandson before it's too late!" Michael said. "Yes Sir. back to the immediate problem." Tyler began, "Problem? We have a problem?" Michael asked. "Sir, if I may be blunt? Who's fucking with whom now?" Tyler said poking his back with a finger. "Say your piece!" Michael said. "You need to remember your position in the family Sir! Like the manager of a corporation, you don't give orders. You oversee how the factory runs and quietly tweak potential problems before they become major disasters. I don't think any son has ever listened to a screaming father. If I were you I would be quietly working behind the scenes to change things to how you think they should be. `Tis better to plant the seed and let someone else do the gardening, isn't it?" Tyler asked. Michael didn't respond. "I think if you gave certain people an apology then you would garner more respect and have greater success in the long run. I think it's the last thing on the planet anyone would ever expect from you. I'm sure it would fuck up their minds a little! Best way to lead is by example, right?" Tyler said climbing off of Michael and telling him to lie still. Tyler went over to the ensuite bathroom and turned on the water in the Jacuzzi tub. He came back out with two warm washcloths and wiped his back down. "So you think this would work?" Michael asked. "I'm not sure Sir, but when you are trying to break down a wall and it isn't working you need to try another spot." Tyler said. "I think you are wise beyond your years, Tyler!" Michael said. Tyler pulled out the towels from under his chest and stomach. He opened one up and held it up high so he couldn't see Michael's nakedness as he got up. Tyler wrapped the towel around him and tied it. He took Michael's Scotch and led him into the bathroom. Tyler turned on the jets and assisted as Michael stepped into the tub. Tyler went around behind him and removed his towel trying to give Michael as much privacy as he could. Michael, with Tyler's arm for guidance lowered himself down into the tub. Tyler went back into the bedroom and scooped up the creamy towel on the bed and returned into the bathroom. "Sir! When you are done. you are going to accidentally knock this towel into the tub if you get my point?" Tyler winked. "Gotcha Tyler!" Michael smiled. Tyler bent down close to his ear and said. "I will be back in ten minutes to retrieve you, and Sir between you and me and the towel! If anyone ever suggests you are old? Just remember that a nineteen year old says you are well equipped, well maintained, and your engine runs like a Corvette with a 350 engine in it! See ya in ten, Grandpa!" Tyler winked and kissed his forehead. Michael grinned from ear to ear as he slid down into the bubbling water up to his neck. Tyler took his Scotch away and set it out of his reach. Tyler left the room closing the door and headed back to Derek's room to wash up. Derek had hooked up Tyler's computer to his internet connection and was downloading music. "That's not legal you know!" Tyler said walking through the room and into the washroom. He had to pee so badly and was glad his own erection had deflated from what had just happened. "What the Hell were you and my Grandfather doing for the last half hour?" Derek asked following him into the washroom. "I was jerking him off Derek! What do you think I was doing?" Tyler said whipping his cock out to pee. Derek turned his head away. "What's a matter? Never seen my cock before? Suddenly embarrassed?" Tyler teased. "No, It just makes me so horny that I thought I better not be thinking about it right now!" Derek said. "Too bad. I could really use a quickie right now!" Tyler joked as he zipped up his cargos. "So what were you two talking about?" Derek asked. "His position in the family and how he should lead by example rather than yell and scream!" Tyler said. "Yeah right! That'll be the day!" Derek laughed. "Derek. It's not very often that I ask you to trust my judgement but this is one of those times! Be nice to him and see what happens okay? Just give him one more chance!" Tyler asked. Derek scowled at Tyler but he also knew that Tyler hadn't been wrong yet. "I love you Derek!" Tyler said kissing his cheek and walking out of the room. Tyler returned to the bedroom and knocked before entering. The jets could be heard flowing and Tyler knocked on the bathroom door before entering. Michael was dozing with a smile. "Sir! It's time to get out!" Tyler said and Michael woke up. Tyler smiled and repeated that it was time to get out. Michael, again with Tyler's help, got out of the tub. Tyler began drying Michael off. "You don't have to that, Tyler. I am more than capable of drying myself off." Michael said. "Yes Sir. It was just out of respect. If I expect you to respect me then I have to show you that I respect you!" Tyler said smiling. "You made your point, Tyler!" Michael said as he placed his hand on Tyler's cheek. "You're a good boy Tyler, and a smart one!" "Thank you, Sir." Tyler gave Michael a tight hug whether he wanted it or not. "I think if you let people get to know the real you they will see all there is to love about you." Tyler said as he released himself from Michael and said he would see him downstairs for some pie! When Tyler walked into the kitchen everyone stopped looking at the picture he gave the Andersons and stared at him. "What?" Tyler asked. "Just wondering how Dad is?" Larry asked. "He's fine Sir! We had a nice chat and he went and took a bath." Tyler said, "He's coming down for some pie and speaking of. any left? I'm starving!" Tyler asked. Luke and Casey came running into the kitchen. "Mom can we have some more pie?" Luke asked as both boys held up their plates. Linda looked at Tyler and he said, "Sure guys! We need to save one piece for Grandpa though!" Tyler cut two smaller pieces and put them on their plates. "No spilling guys, and remember to bring your plates back!" Tyler said. He went to the fridge and took out the chocolate milk. As he walked towards the Great Room Luke yelled that they needed some more chocolate milk. "This stuff?" Tyler said scaring him as he held out the container of milk. "How did you do. How did you know." Luke said. "I read your mind! I know everything you are thinking!" Tyler teased and Luke's mouth dropped open. "I even know about your Lindsay Lohan fantasies and the peanut butter!" Tyler joked and Luke gasped. "You're shittin him aren't you Ty?" Casey asked smiling. "Pretty much.." Tyler said walking away. Michael Anderson walked into the room and everyone tensed up except Tyler. "Mr. Anderson, I saved you the last piece of pecan pie if you would like to have it?" Tyler said. "Why thank you Tyler that would be great as long as I'm not taking it from anyone else?" Grandpa asked. Linda looked at Tyler and was about to say that Tyler never got to try a piece but he cut her off. "No Sir! Everyone else who wanted one got one and Mr. Anderson said to be sure and save a piece for you." "Thank you Larry. Now you see Tyler! Watch Larry and you too can grow into be a fine young man like my son!" Grandpa said. Larry started choking on his coffee and Mary made a gesture to Linda that it was the Scotch talking. Linda grinned. "Mary, I was thinking while taking a bath that we really shouldn't put them out. Why don't we book a hotel room for tonight before the storm fills all the rooms and then we could take them all out to brunch tomorrow?" Mary's eye narrowed with suspicion over Michael's idea. "Bring your pie Michael. we'll go into Larry's office and make some phone calls and see what is available." Mary said suspiciously. Michael picked up his half eaten pie and as he was walking out he turned and said to Linda, "Linda, this pie is absolutely delicious!" Mary held the door opened to Larry's office and shut it behind Michael after he entered. "What the hell is going on Michael? How much Scotch have you been drinking?" Mary asked. "Hardly any! I didn't even drink half of the glass that Tyler brought up." Michael said sitting down in one of the wing chairs opposite Larry's desk. "Are you going to phone about getting us a room?" He asked. "In a moment. first I want to know why the sudden change of attitude?" Mary asked. "Mary, you're right and I am wrong. I've been so hard on Larry over the years that we've grown apart. Derek hates me; Larry won't talk to me unless I call him; and you're going to be angry with me for the next two weeks like you are every year! It's my fault and I am going to start right now making things better." Michael said. Mary walked up to him and put her hand on his forehead. "You're not running a fever." She said. "Dammit woman! I'm not sick! I've already told you. You're right! You've always been right and I've been wrong. Now call and book us a room." Michael said licking the back of his fork and walking to the door. "Oh. see if they have a room with Jacuzzi in it!" He said winking at her as he headed out of the room and back to the kitchen. "What the hell just happened?" Larry asked. "I don't know. did you put something in his Scotch?" Linda asked. They both looked at each other and then looked at Tyler. "What?" Tyler said turning to cover his grin. "Tyler! We have three other sons! Don't you think we've heard the 'what' enough times to know when someone is guilty?" Linda asked smirking at him. As Tyler was washing the pie plate he said quietly to Linda, "Do you really think I could change 'Grandpa Satan' as Derek calls him?" "Yeah I do! I'm just wondering what kind of magic powers you possess?" Linda said nudging Tyler in the side. "Want me to change him back?" Tyler said winking at her. "NO!" Larry yelled and Linda and Tyler laughed. "No what?" Grandpa asked as he returned with his dirty fork and plate and handed it to Tyler. "Ahhh. No more food before dinner!" Larry said. "Oh okay, glad I got my piece of pie in time, but you're right. It's going to be another one of Linda's fabulous meals and it's worth remaining hungry for!" Michael said to Larry as he patted his shoulder and announced that he was going to spend some time with his grandsons. "Tyler if you allow me to bottle your pixie dust and sell it we could be rich!" Larry asked. Derek had finished downloading music and decided to head downstairs to watch some football. He opened his bedroom door and got halfway down the hall when he saw Grandpa just about at the top of the stairs. "Ahhhhhhh!" Derek said and turned and ran back into his bedroom shutting the door. Grandpa walked down the hallway and saw Derek's door was shut but Kyle's bedroom door was open and he was sitting on the floor playing his playstation. "Knock knock!" Grandpa said as he entered the room. Kyle looked up and then looked back at his game without saying anything. "Whatcha playing?" Grandpa asked. "Just a video game." Kyle said. "What one?" Grandpa asked. "Race with the Devil: To Hell and Back!" Kyle said. "Can two people play it together?" Grandpa asked. "Yeah, up to four can play but you need a really big screen TV for that to work." Kyle said twisting his body around as he turned corners in the race. "Cool!" Grandpa said. "Could I play too?" "Huh?" Kyle said crashing the car on the screen into a wall. "I said could I play too?" Grandpa asked. "Ummmm. This game?" Kyle asked. "Yes." Grandpa said. "With me?" Kyle asked. "That was sort of the idea. unless you're afraid I will kick your scrawny little ass?" Grandpa said. "Pull up a cushion and sit down beside me Old Man! You're going to Hell.. and back!" Kyle said smiling at him. Grandpa took a pillow off of Kyle's bed and sat down on the floor beside Kyle and crossed his legs. Kyle handed him a game controller and explained how the buttons worked. Kyle saved his current level and started them back at the beginning of the game. It didn't take Grandpa long to get the hang of it and soon they were both leaning into turns as if it would actually help them. Grandpa slammed his car left into the Devil's car and sent him off a bridge into the pit o' hell! Level One Complete the screen said. Grandpa put his hand out to shake with Kyle and Kyle showed him how to make a fist and hit knuckles. "No, like this Grandpa! And you say 'dooooood'!" Kyle said. "Dude?" Grandpa replied. "No Grandpa, it's Dooooood!" Kyle said laughing. "Okay, dooooood!" Grandpa said. Kyle fell back laughing and his ball cap came off. "Now I want you to say 'Whoa. dooooood and then hit my fist with yours!'" Kyle said. Grandpa grabbed Kyle's ball cap off of his head and put it on his own head backwards as he put his fist out to Kyle and said, "Whoa. dooooood!" Kyle was into a belly laugh as he fell over off the cushion he was sitting on. "Hey Grand-doooood! We've started the next level and you're behind!" Grandpa said laughing. "Shit! Oops. Sorry Grandpa!" Kyle said and Grandpa laughed. "Do you see your Mom or Grandma around?" Grandpa asked. "No." Kyle said. Grandpa winked and looked back at the game. Tyler went upstairs to find Derek and as he approached the two bedrooms he heard the laughter coming from Kyle's room. He looked in and smiled. Tyler quietly left the doorway and went back downstairs. "Dr. Anderson, can I get your help for a moment?" Tyler said. "Sure Tyler, what do you need?" Larry asked. Tyler signalled him to follow. Larry ran up the curved staircase behind Tyler. When they reached the top of the stairs Tyler shushed Larry and they crept down the hallway. Tyler pointed for Larry to peek into Kyle's room and have a look. Larry stuck his head inside the half opened door and saw his Dad wearing Kyle's ball cap backwards playing video games. Then heard the two of them say, "Whoa. Dooooood!" As their fists knocked against each other. In a very quiet voice Larry said, "Oh My God!" Tyler had to turn away because he started to laugh. Larry backed quietly out of the room and pulled Tyler into a hug. He whispered into his ear, "I don't know what you did but don't ever stop!" Tyler laid his head on Larry's chest and savoured the moment. Larry rubbed his back as he felt Tyler sigh and fall into his arms. "We're never letting you get away Tyler! Ever!" He said. Tyler squeezed him tightly to let Larry know that it was just fine with him. Linda and Mary worked away in the kitchen preparing the final touches on dinner. Luke ran into the kitchen followed by Casey. "Has the turkey got its erection yet?" Luke asked. "LUCAS!" Linda said and Mary burst out laughing. "What?" Luke said. "Did the thingy pop up yet?" "We're not having a Butterball turkey this year. This is a fresh, free-range turkey!" Linda said. "Now dinner will be soon . . . go back and watch your show!" Linda told the boys. "Whatever. We're starved!" Luke said heading back to the Great Room with Casey in tow. Tyler and Larry returned to the kitchen. "Good! You boys are back. We need your help in here. Larry, the potatoes need to be mashed and Tyler, can you put the two bowls of stuffing into the lower oven." Linda asked. Everyone pitched in to help put the finishing touches on dinner. "Where's your father Larry?" Mary asked. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you! He's playing video games with Kyle." Larry said as he added butter and milk to the potatoes. "Larry would you get the turkey out and begin carving it up please." Linda said in a flustered voice. "Tyler, would you go and let everyone know that dinner will be in less that 15 minutes please." "Yes Ma'am!" Tyler said heading out of the kitchen. "Sorry to interrupt your game guys but dinner is almost ready and Kyle don't forget about the clothing! I have to get your brother also." Tyler said. "That's okay Tyler, I will get him while Kyle gets changed." Grandpa said. "Thank you Sir, they need me in the kitchen." Tyler said running down the hallway. Derek heard the noises and the smells of turkey had made him hungry for the last hour, so he decided to head downstairs and see if he could help with dinner. He opened his bedroom door to see his Grandfather standing there with his fist held up in the air. "AAAAhhhhhhh!" Derek yelled. "Sorry Derek! I didn't mean to scare you. I just wanted to tell you that dinner was almost ready." Grandpa said. "Yes Sir!" Derek said turning around and walking back to his closet to put on a tie. "May I come in?" Grandpa asked. Derek paused for a second. "Yes Sir." He said. "Derek I realize you're not comfortable around me and it wouldn't be much of a stretch to say that you hate me. Nor would it be unjustified!" Grandpa said as Derek slowly turned around to face him. "Even if it is too late for me to repair the damage I've done I want to apologize to you for being. ummmm. what Kyle calls a dumbass!" Derek started to laugh. "It's okay Sir." Derek said. "Derek. Please don't call me Sir! Call me an asshole or whatever you want because that is all I deserve to be called, though I would prefer Grandpa. Even though I am an ass, I've never not loved you!" Grandpa said. "Thanks Grandpa!" Derek said and they hugged because they wanted to, not because they had too. "Don't lose that Tyler boy Derek! He's as fine of a young man as any of my Grandsons!" He added. "I won't Grandpa! He means a lot to me." Derek said letting go of his Grandfather. "I know he does Derek." Grandpa winked and turned to leave the room. "Wait up Grandpa and we can go down to dinner together." Derek said as he played with his tie trying to get it knotted. "Here Son, let me do it for you." Grandpa said. Michael turned Derek around and had him face the mirror. He stood behind him and reached around showing him how to make a Windsor knot. "Wow! Thanks. Now I don't have to keep asking Tyler to do it!" Derek said smiling. "In that case maybe you shouldn't tell him you know how?" Grandpa said and together they headed downstairs. As they walked into the kitchen everyone complimented Derek on how nice he looked. "Speaking of. I need to go get changed!" Tyler said exiting the kitchen and heading to Derek's room. Tyler put on a clean blue shirt with a white collar. He chose a solid red neon tie since it was an American Thanksgiving dinner. He was cleaning out his pants pockets when he found the turkey bone. Kyle came into his room looking for help with his tie so Tyler stuck the bone in his shirt pocket. "Hey handsome!" Tyler said. "Got a date tonight?" Kyle looked behind him at the open door and quietly said, "Fuck Off and help me do this tie please!" Tyler pulled Derek's desk chair up in front of the full-length wall mirror. He sat down and had Kyle sit on his lap. He showed Kyle how to tie the knot and then he spun him around and kissed Kyle on the lips. "I love you not so little dude, Happy Thanksgiving Day!" "I love you too Ty!" Kyle said hugging him. "Let's go eat eh?" Tyler said as he hugged Kyle. Everyone gathered around the kitchen island. Luke and Casey were busy sneaking pieces of the now carved turkey. One of the many traditions that Tyler was about to experience was the progression of food. Everyone picked up a bowl, platter, dish, or plate of something to take into the dining room for dinner. Symbolic of everyone bringing something to the table! By the time they gathered around the table there was mashed potatoes, a turkey platter, two types of stuffing, gravy, homemade rolls, carrots in an onion sauce, green beans and sweet potato casserole, corn-on-the-cob, honey glazed ham, and a large jar of peanut butter. Everyone stood behind their chairs in front of the place cards holding their names. Larry was at the head of the table with his mother, Mary to his left, followed by his father Michael, Luke, and Casey. Linda was at the opposite end of the table with Kyle to her left followed by Tyler in the centre, and Derek on his father's right side. "Tyler and Casey, welcome to our home and our family. We are honoured that you have both chosen to share in our annual Thanksgiving Day meal. We have some traditions during this meal. Some are old, some are new!" Larry said and Luke and Kyle began giggling. Everyone was smiling knowing what was going to happen except for Tyler. Larry caught Tyler's bewildered look and said, "You guys didn't tell him did you?" Larry asked. Derek, Kyle, and Luke burst into laughter shaking their heads. "Feel free to take the three. four of them out to the woodshed after dinner Tyler! I believe we have a family full of pranksters." Larry said. "Okay, who's going to say Grace?" Larry asked. "Grace!" Luke yelled out. "What?" "Why don't you dear?" Linda asked Larry. "I will Mom!" Derek said and the small bits of idle chatter stopped. "Are you sure dear? You don't have to if you don't want to!" Linda said. "No, I'm fine Mom." Derek said. Everyone pulled out the chair in front of them and stood at the table. Tyler didn't know exactly what to expect so he simply followed everyone else. They all joined hands and Kyle on his right and Derek on his left both squeezed Tyler's hands three times. Tyler returned the sentiment. "Dear Lord," Derek began and everyone bowed their heads, "On this day we celebrate all that you have given us in the past and all that you will provide for us in the future. We thank you for this meal to celebrate your love that you have bestowed upon us! We thank you for the safe arrival of our Grandparents and the love they give us. We thank you for bringing Casey into our family and hope that you keep an eye on him so that he is always safe. We thank you for bringing Tyler into our lives and pray that he is always a part of our family as well! We ask you Lord to remember those who have given their lives in hope that our country will always remain a beacon for freedom from persecution, hatred, and intolerance. We ask you Lord to look out for those around the world who are not able to be with their families tonight because they are giving of themselves so that America can continue to be free. We five brothers thank you Lord for giving us parents who show unconditional love and finally we all thank you for always being here to guide us when we fall off the path and need direction to get back home. And Lord, on behalf of my brother, we thank you for giving us Peanut Butter! Amen!" "Amen!" Everyone added laughing. "Oh Derek, that was beautiful!" Linda said with tears running down her eyes. "Yes Derek! That was the best ever! You've got the job for life!" Larry said to more laughter. Tyler squeezed his hand three times. "No biggie Dad. I googled it!" Derek said to more laughter and everyone sat down at the table. "You guys really didn't tell him?" Larry asked and Derek, Kyle, Luke and Casey all snickered and lowered their heads not looking at Tyler. "Tyler, this is where we all go around the table and say something that we are thankful for. Keep it short because we all want to eat." Larry winked. "Mom, would you start us off?" Larry asked and Mary stood up. "Well, I just want to say how thankful I am to be able to spend time with my family, and for Michael recovering well enough to make the trip, and getting to share in this wonderful meal that Linda and Tyler worked so hard on!" Mary said sitting back down. "Dad, you're next!" Larry said as went around the table. Michael stood up. "As thankful and honoured as I am to be here I want to apologize to everyone." Michael began and stunned looks appeared on the Anderson faces. "I want to apologize to my son for not being the Dad I should have been. I want to apologize to my daughter-in-law, who is by chance, a daughter in my heart! And I want to apologize to my five grandchildren here before me. I have let you all down through my own self-pity and arrogance. I hope to earn forgiveness from each and every one of you, if you will allow me. I am not deserving of being here at this table but I want you all to know that I will do everything in my power to make it up to you. Lastly, I want to apologize to the most important person in my life, Mary. You are God's shining example of what he wants all of us to be like. I am not worthy of the 49 years you given me but I want you to know how much I love you and how much I appreciate all you done for me." Michael said and Mary stood up with tears in her eyes and they kissed. Derek and Tyler began a clapping and everyone joined in. Michael and Mary sat down. "Luke! Do you have anything you want to say?" Larry asked. "Yeah Dad, I'm thankful that I ate some turkey a while ago because I'm starving! Oh! And I'm thankful for peanut butter!" Luke said grinning. "Whatever!" Kyle said shaking his head. "Kyle! Enough! Casey, don't feel you have to say anything but if you would like to go ahead!" Larry said. "Ummm. I just want to say thanks to Tyler for helping me out and all the nice things he did for me and I want to thank everyone here for inviting me to dinner. and I'm thankful for peanut butter too!" Casey said and Luke high-fived him! Everyone else at the table laughed. "Casey, you are more than welcome and thank you for helping us celebrate this holiday!" Larry said. "I am thankful for having all five of my boys here at the table tonight! I am thankful that Grandpa came through his surgery earlier this year and is able to be here and I am thankful for having such a wonderful husband to help raise our children!" Linda said. Everyone looked at Kyle. "I'm thankful for everyone here. Each of you makes my life better but there are two people that stand out! I am thankful for having Tyler join our family. I've learned so much from him. It isn't anything that Mom and Dad haven't already said but he puts in a way that makes me feel good about myself. I'm also thankful to have my brother back home." Kyle said looking down at the floor. He stopped and wiped a tear before it started and then sat down. "Tyler?" Larry asked. "I really don't know what to say, I'm overwhelmed by everyone here! Everyone at this table has been so kind to me, welcoming a stranger into your world. You all keep telling me that I am considered to be part of your family and I can't think of a greater gift that has been given to me. You hear people say a lot of things they don't really mean but everyone here takes their word seriously. I am humbled and honoured by your including me." Tyler said sitting down. "I thought you said you didn't have anything to say?" Luke sat with his arms crossed. "Derek, we're all hungry!" Larry said and Derek stood up staring down at his plate. "I have a few things I need to say." Derek began. "Oh God!" Luke sighed slumping down in his chair. Linda glared at him. "I want to apologize to everyone at this table." Derek began, "I've let you all down as a Grandson, a son, a friend, and most importantly as a brother. I've been so focused on feeling sorry for myself and not taking responsibility for problems I've created myself, that I ignored you all or even worse took my anger out on you. Grandma and Grandpa, Mom and Dad, I'm sorry for my actions or rather lack of actions. I've taken belonging to this family for granted. I'm trying everyday to fix that and I hope you can all forgive me." Tears began dropping on to Derek's plate. He wouldn't look up at any of them. "If you think that living with me has been difficult just imagine what Tyler has had to go through sharing a room with me." Tyler squeezed his hand three times. "Tyler, I don't how you've managed to put up with me? I know I've said I'm sorry a thousand times and I can never make it up to you but you are the best friend I've ever had! You're the person who least deserves to be stuck anywhere near me." Everyone but Luke and Casey had tears streaming down. "Honestly Tyler, I don't even know why you're here after what I did to your eye." Derek said. "OH MY GOD Derek!" Linda said out loud!. "Linda! Please!" Larry said holding up his hand to stop her from saying anything more. Tyler raised his head slightly and looked to his left at Derek and said. "I'm just here for the peanut butter!" Derek, Larry, and Linda started laughing and everyone else joined in. They all left their places at the table to go and give Derek a hug. Tyler whispered in his ear as he hugged him, "I love you." Derek collapsed into Tyler's arms and wept. Tyler lowered him back into his chair and everyone returned to their seats. "I'm so sorry Tyler." Derek said. "How do I ever thank you for all you've done to help me?" "You already have Derek. many times over." Tyler said smiling at him. "Can we eat now?" Luke asked. "In a moment Luke!" Larry said. "I don't think that I could top what's been said tonight so I will simply tell you all that I love each and every one of you and I thank you all for helping make this family celebration complete! Let's eat!" Larry said. "But Dad?" Kyle said. "What about the." "Kyle, after dinner okay? This went on a little longer than usual so we'll do it then." Larry said. Tyler leaned over to Kyle and whispered, "Do what?" Kyle simply grinned and passed Tyler the mash potatoes without saying any more. The Anderson tradition of food being shared and passed around continued until the plates were filled and the peanut butter jar was half empty. There was limited talk as everyone was busy eating. Linda signalled Larry to look over at the boys. Larry looked over and noticed Tyler was staring at Michael with a look of horror on his face. His eyes followed Tyler's gaze to see Grandpa putting some peanut butter on turkey like Luke and Casey did. As Grandpa quietly put the fork full of peanut butter coated turkey in his mouth his face distorted with pain from the taste. Larry and Tyler burst into laughter. Tyler stole the Thanksgiving meal with his apple and onion stuffing and his carrots with an onion sauce. He kept seeing Grandma Mary looking back and forth between Linda and a very quiet Derek. "I think we need some more gravy?" Tyler said. "Here Tyler, I will refill the gravy boat." Linda said. "I'll give you a hand Mrs. Anderson." Tyler said getting up and following her into the kitchen. "Mrs. Anderson, what happened between Derek and me is over with. He feels bad enough already." Tyler said. "Tyler what Derek did goes against everything we've ever taught him. Something like this can't be allowed to pass unnoticed." Linda said. "Ma'am. That's between you and Derek. I can only tell you that Derek has always said you are the one person in his life he could always count on to understand him and not judge him. I think he needs you with him now more than ever. He's already punishing himself for what happened." Tyler said. "I understand what you are saying Tyler but..." Linda said setting the saucepan back down. "I'll take the gravy back in." Tyler said leaving her in the kitchen. Tyler sat back down at the dining table and everyone was quiet. "I thought this was a celebration?" Tyler asked and no one answered. Derek glared at him. Tyler slammed his fist into Derek's thigh. "Owwww! What did you do that for?" Derek demanded. "We're even! You hit me, I hit you, now get over it!" Tyler smiled and the atmosphere lightened up. "If everyone doesn't start talking I'm going to do voice impersonations or tell really bad jokes!" Tyler teased. "Nooooooooo!!!!" Chimed Kyle and Derek. Everyone laughed as Linda walked into the room. "I want to hear a joke Ty!" Luke asked. "Okay Luke! A guy named Derek walks into a bar. Owwwww!" Tyler said. Luke stared at him for two seconds and then burst into a fit of laughter. Casey said, "I don't get it?" Luke whispered in his ear and Casey started laughing. "I still want to hear a real joke Ty!" Luke asked. "Maybe later Luke." Tyler said as he picked up his spoon and inserted it in his breast pocket of his shirt. "Why did you put the spoon in your pocket?" Luke asked. "I'll tell ya later Luke!" Tyler winked Linda wrapped her arms around Derek from behind his chair and kissed him on the cheek. "Are all of my boys getting enough to eat?" She asked. Everyone said they were getting full! "Here Ty, eat something so we don't have to hear anymore of your jokes!" Kyle said. "Fine! I had a really good one but you'll never hear it now!" Tyler said. "Please! Please! Please!" Luke and Casey whined. "Sorry guys I offered to tell one later, but now you'll have to take it up with Kyle after dinner." Tyler said. Luke stuck his tongue out at Kyle and Kyle returned the same sentiment. When everyone had finally finished stuffing themselves and the effects of the turkey began to sink in Linda got up and started to clear the table. "NO Mom! You cooked! Your five boys are cleaning up." Derek said. Linda's mouth dropped open as she looked at a smiling Larry. "Careful boys, I could get use to this kind of treatment!" Linda teased. Derek and Tyler worked at cleaning the plates that Kyle, Luke, and Casey brought in. They scraped up a large bowl of leftover turkey with gravy for Abbey to eat. Luke had to add some peanut butter to her dish. Tyler clicked on the coffee maker and boiled water for tea. Derek removed the pies from the warming oven and Kyle took out the dessert plates, forks, and serving utensils. The only things remaining on the dinner table were the centerpiece, nametags, and a jar of peanut butter. Luke carried out the cream and Casey followed with the sugar. Derek and Tyler got everything they could into the dishwasher and started it while piling the pots and pans into a sink of warm water to soak. Tyler cut up the rest of Luke's squares and gave them to Kyle to take out telling him he didn't need to come back into the kitchen. Tyler grabbed Derek's shoulder and spun him around scaring the shit out of Derek. He grabbed hold of his tie and pulled him in for a kiss. "I love you Mr. Anderson and don't you ever think otherwise!" Tyler winked and grabbed the tray with the apple and pumpkin pies on it. Derek followed in with the teapot and coffee decanter. Before Linda began offering dessert to everyone she asked Tyler to explain all about the desserts he made. "Well, first we have a standard apple pie with a couple of twists. One I won't tell you about and see if you can figure it out and the other part is the crumble topping on it! The pumpkin pie is like all pumpkin pies except better!" He stopped looking for a reaction. "My what an ego you have Mr. Peel!" Derek teased. "Continuing on. after I was so rudely interrupted." Tyler teased, "The pumpkin pie has a gingerbread base with a topping of caramelized crushed pecans on it. As for the squares. you'll have to ask Luke because he made them not me!" "I put a lot of peanut butter together with other stuff and baked it! It was hard work so enjoy because I'm never doing it again." Luke said with his arms folded. Everyone laughed. Everyone went for small pieces of each pie, some ice cream, and one of Luke's squares! Luke, being in a generous mood made his rounds with the jar of peanut butter offering anyone who would take it, a peanut butter topping on his square. Only Larry, Tyler, and Casey took him up on the offer! Derek and Tyler made their round pouring tea or coffee while Kyle went to the kitchen for a glass of white milk for him and two chocolate milks for Luke and Casey. "Alright Tyler! I give up! I can taste something tangy in the apple pie but I don't know what it is, but I sure want to know so I can make it!" Mary asked. "It's crumbled up three year-old white cheddar cheese Mrs. Anderson!" Tyler said. "Ewwwww!" Said Luke. "You ate two pieces Luke!" Linda said. "Well that's because I was hungry, not because I like it." Luke said scrunching up his face. "Did you like the apple pie Casey?" Tyler asked. "It was great. but it needed peanut butter." Casey said shyly. Everyone laughed. "Okay if we are all ready." Larry began as he stood up. "Mom, thank you for coming and sharing in our Thanksgiving Day celebration." He began and Derek, Kyle, and Luke began uncontrollable laughter. Luke said to Tyler, "It gets better every year!" "Luke shut up!" Derek said frowning at him. Tyler looked confused. Larry continued, "But Mom, why couldn't you have simply read the manual on Planned Parenthood? Look at this family and what it's costing me? Didn't they have abortion back then?" Everyone was giggling except for Tyler who had a horrified look on his face. "And Dad!" Larry began "We're so glad you survived your by-pass operation in the summer. I mean it's not like you had the decency to die old man and leave me some money so I could afford to get a divorce and be done with the lot of them! Frankly Dad, you're so old you remember when the Dead Sea was only sick!" Michael was tearing up from laughing. Tyler made a fist under the table having no idea what the hell was going on! "By the way, are the 'Depends' we sent you for your birthday working alright? Linda just had these seats recovered!" Larry said. Luke, Casey, and Kyle were almost out of breath from laughing. Tyler didn't realize that they were laughing as much from his expressions as they were from what Larry was saying. "Lucas, Lucas, Lucas. my third mistake! So much for the rhythm method Honey! Luke if you ever develop a desire for Tequila and the backseat of a '91 Pontiac Grand Prix then let me know and I will tell you a sad, sad story." Larry said as his roasting continued. "Casey! You're excused this year but watch out for next year!" Larry winked. "Dad!!! That's not fair! Casey's family too!" Luke complained. "Casey you play hockey like the girl we always wanted, so we might just keep you around forever as long as you don't listen to boy-bands! And we're taking all your clothes back and getting you dresses!" Larry teased. Luke and Casey were giggling as Tyler was beginning to figure out that this was all a joke of some sort? "Linda! We have the money! You don't work! Would it kill you to have some enhancements, liposuction, and botox? As long as we have to share the same bed could you at least face the other way?" Larry asked laughing, while Linda wiped her tears away with her napkin from laughing. "Kyle! Why did you have to float? I kept holding you under water but you kept coming back up to the top!" Kyle laughed. "Your real mother wasn't even good in bed!" Larry said. "We knew you were a treasure when we brought you home. So we buried you but you kept finding your way back!" Kyle snorted his milk through his nose. "Then there is our pansy-assed, bleeding heart liberal, tree-hugging, anti-gun, save the Beaver, 28 man navy with a leaky row boat, cinnamon bun scarfing Canuck! Or should I say that again slower?" Larry said and Tyler laughed louder than anyone else in the room. "Your kind really make us sick! You're always saving this and saving that! Crawl out of that igloo and kill something with your bare hands like a real American!" Larry had to stop and wait for the roar of laughter to die down before he continued. "Last and MOST definitely least there's Derek! Dammit Linda! Why did you buy those cheap condoms? Two million sperm and you were the fastest? What the hell happened? Still tired from the race! You know how some kids come from the cabbage section of the super market? You came from the day old, stale-dated section. We had to cover you in beef drippings just to get Abbey to play with you! When God gave you a brain you should have asked for it to go!" Larry said teasing as Derek cried happy tears this time. "Okay, where's the bowl?" Larry asked. "I GOT IT!" Kyle yelled and jumped up. He ran around the table took everyone's place card except Larry's. He ran out to the kitchen and returned with all of the place cards in the bowl. Luke was in hysterics! Kyle took the bowl and held it up high over Larry's head. Tyler's bewildered look returned to his face. "You guys really didn't tell him did you?" Larry asked. Derek covered his mouth and shook his head no. "Okay Tyler I will explain. Every year one person gets to roast the rest of the family and then he or she has to choose the person to respond. That person gets to roast everyone next year. Do you follow the cycle?" Tyler nodded but was still confused. "So Tyler, the person chosen from the bowl gets to give pay back on behalf of everyone at the table." Larry said. Larry reached his hand up over his head to place his hand in the bowl. Derek, Kyle, Luke, and Casey couldn't contain their laughter. Larry reached in to the bowl held over his head and pulled out one place card and read the name aloud. "It's the guy with the spoon in his breast pocket!" Larry said holding Tyler's place card for everyone to see. Everyone began laughing. Tyler showed a look of horror. Kyle set the bowl down in front of Larry and returned to his seat. "C'mon Tyler! You're the lucky man tonight!" Larry said. Tyler stood up with his mouth hanging open. "I, I, I can't do this?" He said. "Typical Canadian wimp eh Derek?" Larry said mocking Tyler. Larry and Derek fisted hands together. "With all due respect Sir." Tyler began, "It would be rude as a guest to comment on how handsome your Father and your Son's are! It's obvious that beauty skips a generation in this family!" A course of "Ooooooooooooooo's!" came out from the table. "On such short notice it is hard to imagine what to say! Maybe I'll settle for imagining you with a personality!" Tyler taunted and his now cheering section said, "Ooooooo!" and they all laughed. Larry sat listening to Tyler's rebuttal and looked inside the bowl and began laughing out loud. Kyle saw him look at the bowl and held his finger to his mouth. "I do have to be somewhat kind. considering your age Dr. Anderson! Is it true that happy hour to you is a nap? I heard that a night out for you only happens when Mrs. Anderson puts wheels on your rocking chair?" Tyler said and Linda covered her face from laughing. "And before you pick on us Canucks. take a look at how the world sees America! You want a divorce? You go on a nationally syndicated talk show and beat up your spouse with a chair. Only in America does a pizza arrive faster than an ambulance! Only in America can you find drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering on them. Only in America do people order double-cheeseburgers, fries with gravy, with a diet Coke! If you looked at a map of Canada Dr. Anderson, you would see that we are bigger than you and we are on top! If we were in prison right now. you'd be my BITCH!" Tyler said and sat down. Everyone stood and gave him a round of applause. Tyler raised his hands for everyone to be quiet! "And Dr. Anderson?" Tyler said reaching into his pocket and pulling out the piece of turkey bone, he handed it Larry. "This fell out of the tree and I believe it belongs to you?" Tyler smirked. The loudest roar of laughter that night went to Tyler. Larry placed his hands together and bowed down to Tyler acknowledging he had won. "Kyle make sure there is an extra blanket in Abbey's dog house for Tyler tonight!" Larry asked. Tyler laughed and so did Larry. When everyone sat back in their chairs and calmed down from laughing Larry handed Tyler the bowl of names. Derek tried to grab it away but Larry made sure that Tyler got it. "Tyler read the names in the bowl!" Larry said as Mary, Michael, and Linda leaned forward to find out what was happening. Tyler flipped through the nametags and looked at a giggling Derek and Kyle. "It's the beats for both of you!!!!!!!" Derek fell off the side of his chair from laughing and Kyle shied away Tyler afraid he would hit him. "What's wrong Tyler?" Mary asked. "Every name in the bowl says 'Tyler' on it!" Tyler laughed. "You guys are sooooo dead!" Larry, Linda, Grandma, and Grandpa roared with laughter! Then the four adults got up and began clearing the plates away. Linda left the one pie with two pieces of pumpkin left in it and told them to eat it up. "Who gets the last two pieces?" Kyle asked. "You and Derek get nothing!" Tyler teased. Luke interrupted the discussion by announcing that he and Casey deserved the last two pieces! "What the fuck are you talking about Lucas?" Derek asked. "Let's face it Derek, me and Casey are young growing boys and since we are the only two sperm donors in this room, we need to build up our strength!" Luke said flipping the two pieces on to his plate and Casey's! Derek and Tyler looked at each other. "Oh my God, I can't believe you said that!" Derek said wide-eyed. Tyler burst out into laughter. "You are so bad Luke!" Luke grinned at Tyler and winked as he began adding peanut butter to his pumpkin pie. The boys cleared what was left on the table and brought everything back to the kitchen. Luke asked if they could change out of their good clothes and Linda said she thought that was a good idea. Luke and Casey left for Luke's bedroom. Abbey barked needing to go outside and Derek jumped off of his bar stool and headed back to the solarium to let her out into the darkness. "Holy Shit!" Derek said. "What's wrong?" Larry asked. "It's a snow storm! A big one!" Derek said. "You're definitely not driving anywhere tonight!" Larry said to his parents. "Dad, you and Mom can have my bedroom and Tyler and I can sleep in Kyle's room and Kyle can stay in Luke's top bunk." Derek said getting an evil stare from Kyle. Larry saw the look on Kyle's face. "Kyle, would you mind sharing a room with Luke and Casey?" He asked. "No Dad." Kyle said unconvincingly as he continued to stare at Derek letting him know his unhappiness with the suggestion. Larry went over to the bar and poured two Cognac's for him and Michael, peach schnapps for his mother, and a glass of white wine for Linda. "You boys want something to drink?" Larry asked of Tyler and Derek as Luke and Casey returned. "I'll have a rum and coke Dad!" Derek said. "Nothing for me Sir, except more coffee." Tyler said getting up to refill his cup. "Shit Luke! Where do you get these t-shirts?" Tyler asked laughing. Luke was wearing his 'Hedonism Rules!' shirt. "I have my sources." Luke said opening the fridge door and getting out the chocolate milk. "Dad can me and Casey have a Vodka shooter?" Luke asked. "No!" Larry responded as if he knew the question was coming. "Fine. be that way." Luke said plunking himself down on the sofa and turning the TV on with Casey following. Tyler laughed thinking it was hilarious but everyone else was use to Luke's unabashed comments and just ignored him. All the men gathered in the Great Room with the fireplace glowing from the fresh logs Larry had added. Larry and Michael took one sofa with Kyle between them and Tyler and Derek flanked the arms of the other sofa with Luke and Casey in the centre. Linda and Mary joined them sitting on chairs. Everyone sat in silence watching either the TV or the fireplace. "Okay you two! It's way past your bedtime!" Linda said to Luke and Casey. "But Mom!!!!!!!!!" Luke whined. "Tyler why are carrying a spoon in your pocket?" Linda asked. "Ummm. I was going to tell a story about it but it's not for the ladies in the room!" Tyler winked. "You think we can't handled it Tyler?" Linda challenged him. "No Ma'am!" Tyler said pointing down at Luke's head, "I just didn't think it was appropriate." "I want to hear the story about the spoon!" Luke demanded. "If you want a joke Luke then you have to tell one first!" Tyler said. "Fine! How many surrealist painters does it take to screw in a light bulb?" Luke said looking up at Tyler beside him. "I don't know! How many Luke?" Tyler asked. "One Trout!" He said looking back at the TV. All the adults burst into laughter. "Luke you need serious psychological help!" Tyler teased. "Whatever! Now tell me about the spoon!" Luke demanded. "Okay, apologies to the ladies in the room!" Tyler began. "A guy walks into a restaurant and is greeted by the Maitre d", Tyler begins. "How can I help you Sir?" The Maitre d' asks? "I'm here for lunch," says the customer and he notices that the Maitre d' has a spoon in his left breast pocket. "Follow me to your table and your Server will be right with you!" He says. The guy sits down and sees a busboy go by with a spoon in his breast pocket as well. Then he notices the bartender wears the same thing! When his server arrives he is also wearing a spoon in his left breast pocket. He is handed a menu. "Welcome Sir! Would you like to order a drink?" The server asks. "Just coffee and I don't really need the menu. Could I have the soup of the day and an egg salad sandwich on toasted whole wheat bread?" The customer asks. "Certainly Sir, I'll be right back with your coffee!" The Server said and as he was about to leave the customer called him back. "Just one question! I see you wear a spoon in your left breast pocket and so does everyone else that works here! I was wondering why?" The customer asked. "Yes Sir! Well. we had a marketing consultant in and he told us that if we wore a spoon in our pocket it could save up to 4 hours in productivity each week." "How the hell do you figure that?" The customer asked. "Easy! If you drop your spoon then I don't have to run back to the kitchen to get you one. I just give you this one!" The Server said. "Okay. Interesting!" The customer said. The Server returned with his coffee and soup. The customer noticed that the Server had a black thread hanging out from his crotch as he left the table. Upon further observation of the restaurant he notice that Maitre d', the busboy, and the bartender all have the same black thread hanging out of their crotches! While observing this, the customer drops his spoon and his Server was right there with a new spoon from his breast pocket. "You see Sir! No waiting, no time lost!" The Server says and the customer laughed and thanked him for the spoon. When the Server returns with the customer's sandwich he takes his soup bowl away and the customer asks, "I notice that you have a black thread hanging down from your crotch and so does everyone else working here. Why is that?" He asks. The Server immediately becomes upset! "Oh, I'm sorry Sir. You're not supposed to notice that. That is why we all wear black pants here." "I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything by it. I was simply curious!" The customer said. The server responded. "Well Sir, that marketing consultant I told you about? He said we could save up to 2 hours in productivity each week by tying a thread to it!" "It?" He said. "How would that save time?" The customer asked. "Easy! When I need to go to the washroom I just unzip my pants and use the thread to pull it out! Since I've never touched it I don't need to wash my hands." The Server said. "Ummm." Said the customer. "Well, how do you put it back in?" He asked. The server leaned in close to the customer and held up his hand to whisper, "I don't know what the others that work here do, but I just use the spoon!" Everyone broke out into laughter. Kyle laughed hardest and Tyler thought that Grandpa might have a heart attack from laughing so hard. "I don't get it?" Luke said. Tyler whispered in his ear. "Oh!" Luke said. "That's not that funny!" "Got a better joke Luke?" Tyler asked. "Of course I do!" Luke said standing up to take the floor. "I heard this from my friend Treb at school! How many Californians' does it take to screw in a light bulb?" "How many Luke?" Grandpa asked. "None! Californians' screw in hot tubs not light bulbs!" Luke said smiling. No one said a word. They all looked back and forth at each other. "Jesus couldn't save you people!" Luke said shaking his head and sitting back down "Time for bed Luke!" Larry said. "Me too!" said Tyler. "Speaking of hot tubs. Mary, it's time for bed!" Grandpa said leading Grandma out of the room. Please do NOT email the author! Post your gripes/compliments/questions at: Many thanks to Nifty.org for providing a vehicle to display my first multi-chaptered story and the poor guy at Nifty who has tolerated me over the last few weeks! All Rights Reserved Copyright 2005-2006 Tyler Peel "Okay! I lost Ty so it's just you and me! I was only joking about making the cheques payable to Lucas Anderson. Nifty really needs your support! They had a server crash and will need to replace and upgrade old equipment. Now I don't get much for an allowance so I'm going to make some Chocolate Peanut Butter Squares and donate them to a place that serves Christmas dinner to those who are less fortunate but most of you can help make a difference!!! I know that David and all the other great guys at the Nifty Alliance won't mind because I'm only 11 years old, but you Roadies can really make a huge difference by doing something today!!! Not tomorrow, TODAY! Write the address down on a piece of paper and stick it in your wallet! Bret, you may have to use a crowbar to open yours but do it anyway! As Ty would say, good intentions are a great start but there is a point in one's life when you need to take action! TEN STINKIN' BUCKS! C'mon! Show the world that Roadies are the coolest readers on the planet!"