Date: Fri, 1 Feb 2002 16:19:28 EST
From: MystryAuthr@aol.com
Subject: Chapter 2 of The Truth of Yesterday

Hi folks. Sorry for the lack of introduction with Chapter 1. That's what
happens when you take three months off from writing; you forget everything
you knew! The Truth of Yesterday is the fourth book in the Killian Kendall
Mystery Series. The first, Bleeding Hearts, was recently published by
Renaissance Alliance Publishing, Inc. (www.rapbooks.biz). The other two
books, Reap the Whirlwind and All Lost Things, can be found here on Nifty
under College or High School, and on my website. Let me know what you think
of the story. Email me at Aterovis@aol.com.

Visit my website at www.steliko.com/bleedinghearts


Chapter 2

	Micah wasn't home when I called so I left a message on his machine
saying that I wanted to talk to him. I thought about leaving a more
informative message but then I decided that news of the sort I had to share
would be better off delivered in person.

	Micah didn't return my call until the next day when I was at
work. I'd tailed Mr. Knox, the allegedly unfaithful husband, to work that
morning, checked in with my friend at the receptionist desk, and then came
into the office to get in a little paperwork before my first class at
11. Micah agreed to come over that evening so we could talk.

	The rest of the day went by in a blur. I barely paid attention in
class and I almost forgot to follow Mr. Knox home. All I could think about
what talking to Micah. Now that I had made up my mind to make things work
with us, I was terrified that it was too late, that I'd already ruined
everything. I knew I was just being ridiculous, that if it was really too
late then Micah would have said so at the diner. I knew this, but it didn't
make the wait any easier.

	I changed my clothes twice after I got home while I waited for him
to get there. I finally settled on a dark blue, form-fitting long-sleeved
shirt that I knew Micah loved because he said it brought out my eyes and a
pair of jeans that he always said made my butt look nice.

	"You're acting like it's your first date," Kane commented from his
place in front of the computer as I gave myself one last once over in the
mirror. My honorary little brother was quite the expert on dating. He'd had
more girlfriends at 16 than most people had in their entire lives. He'd
recently broken up with the girl he'd dated all summer, saying he had to
keep his options open now that school was back in session. Attracting girls
was not a problem for him. He had bright green eyes and short blonde hair
that he wore in a disheveled fashion that seemed to drive the girls
wild. His fashion tended towards skater-punk.

	"I'm as nervous as if it were," I muttered.

	"Why be nervous? Anyone with half a brain can tell that he's crazy
about you."

	"Is that how you were able to tell?"

	"Oh, that hurt."

	Being the mature older brother that I am, I stuck my tongue out at
him and left to wait downstairs.

	Of course, Micah chose to arrive the second I went into the
bathroom to pee. The doorbell rang and seconds later, I heard Kane
clattering down the stairs.

	"I'll get it," I yelled, knowing from experience that if Kane
answered it would only lead to embarrassment for all involved, but mostly
me.

	"From the bathroom? Don't be stupid. I'll get it."

	I heard the door open and swore under my breath.

	"Hey, Micah," Kane said. "Good thing you got here when you did or
Killian would have tried on everything he owns."

	"Arg!" I howled from the bathroom. I washed my hands and burst
through the door to find Micah still standing in the doorway. He looked
fantastic wearing a dark gray ribbed turtleneck sweater and black cargo
pants.

	"You could have at least invited him in," I growled at Kane.

	"Like you gave me time. Anyway, I'm going out. Tell Dad that I'll
be home by ten o'clock."

	"Ok, be careful." For all our bickering, we were actually pretty
close and I often caught myself being protective of him. He threw me a look
and loped off towards the old truck Adam had bought to use at the B&B. He
let Kane use it when they didn't need it.

	I turned back to Micah, who was still standing just outside the
door.

	"Um, come on in?"

	He stepped in and we stood awkwardly in the hall for a few seconds,
neither of us sure what to say.

	"Do you want to go up to my room so we can talk?" I finally asked.

	"Sure."

	He followed me up the stairs and into the room Kane and I
shared. Once there, the uncomfortable silence returned.

	"I thought about..." I started at the same time as Micah said, "You
said you wanted..."

	I giggled and Micah smiled. It was what we had needed to break the
tension. I started again.

	"I thought about what you said and I realized that you were
right. I was holding back part of myself from you and part of the reason
for that was because I wasn't completely over Asher. Another part of the
reason is because I was afraid of being hurt again. I also thought about
what you said about risk." I took a deep breath. "Micah, I love you."

	I watched his face intently for his reaction. I saw something flash
in his eyes but I couldn't identify it before it was gone.

	"What does that mean?" he asked carefully.

	"It means that I've decided that I'm willing to take that risk. I
want to try to make this work. It means you'll have to work with me if you
want to make it work too, but I'm willing to try."

	"What about Asher?"

	"You mean am I over him? Not completely, not yet anyway. Who knows,
maybe I'll never be completely over him, but he's a part of my past now. I
have to move on and I'd like to move on with you. I do love you. I realized
that last night. I was scared to death at the thought of losing you."

	"That scared you more than being hurt?"

	I nodded. "I was afraid to let you in because I was afraid I'd lose
you and I'd just get hurt again, but then I realized that I was going to
lose you by not letting you in, and it would have hurt just as much because
I was already in love with you."

	"Are you really in love with me, Killian?"

	I paused just long enough to see the vulnerability in his
eyes. "Yes, I am."

	He drew in a shaky breath and slowly released it. "Good, because
yesterday when I said I could fall in love with you, that wasn't exactly
the truth. The truth is I already have."

	I threw myself into his arms and we tumbled backwards onto the
bed. I kissed him firmly on the lips and within moments, he was kissing me
back. He rolled us over so that he was on top and we kissed for a few more
minutes. Then he gently pulled away and lifted himself up onto his elbows
so he could look me in the face.

	"God, you are so beautiful, Killian. I could just stare at you all
night long. You know, this is exactly the way I hoped this would happen,
but I was too afraid to actually think it would."

	"Oh ye of little faith," I teased.

	"It's not going to be an easy road, though. You know that, right?"

	"I never thought it would be. You're going to have to be patient
with me. I doubt I can drop all the walls at once. I might need your help."

	"We'll work on it together. You know you're not the only one with
walls though, right?"

	"You too?"

	He lay down next to me and I cuddled into his side. "I think
everybody has them to some degree," he said, "Some are worse than
others. From my experience, it seems that gay guys have more walls than
most. I guess we have to start building our defenses sooner than some
people."

	I twisted around so I could see his face better. "You've told me
about being abused and how you reacted by having sex with a lot of people,
but you've never mentioned falling in love. Am I the first person you've
ever loved?"

	Micah softly stroked the side of my face. "No, I fell in love once
before, when I lived in DC. We lived together for a while."

	"Why'd you break up?"

	"I moved here, he stayed in DC. Neither of us wanted to do the long
distance thing. We made a mutual decision to just call it quits; we both
agreed that we'd run our course and there was no sense in waiting until
things got ugly to break up. At least this way we could stay friends."

	"Did you?"

	"For a while, and then the phone calls got farther and farther
part. Eventually we just stopped calling, about the same time I met you."

	"Are you over him?"

	He thought for a moment. "Yes. I never really expected that to be a
forever thing."

	"What about us? Are we a forever thing?"

	He stared into my eyes for several seconds before answering. "I
don't know. I guess that remains to be seen. Any other questions, sir?"

	"What? You know everything about me; I'm just trying to learn more
about you."

	"You know everything that's important. You know I love you. You
know I want to be with you. What more do you need?"

	"Um, how about a written guarantee? Completely satisfied or my
money back."

	He threw his head back and laughed. "I'll satisfy you, you little
twerp," he said as he threw his leg over my lower body and began to tickle
me.

	I laughed, wiggled, and writhed under him as I gasped for
breath. "Stop!" I finally managed to shout. He collapsed on top of me where
we both panted and giggled.

	"If anyone walked in right now they'd never believe that you were
just tickling me," I wheezed.

	"We are fully clothed you know," Micah pointed out. He sat up and
reached into his pocket.

	"I have something for you," he said as he pulled out a small gray
jewelry box.

	"Oh, is that what I felt? You mean you weren't just happy to be
lying on top of me?" I asked without taking my eyes off of the box.

	"Oh, I was quite happy to be there. I'm sure what you felt was the
real thing. This is just something I bought for you. I was going to give it
to you no matter what you decided. If we broke up, it was something to
remember me by. If we didn't, then...well, here."

	I took the box gingerly and held it in my lap, half afraid to open
it. "Always prepared. You'd make a good boy scout."

	"Except for the fact that I'm gay. Open it, please."

	I looked down apprehensively at the box. What if it was a ring? I
wasn't ready for that. With a sigh, I tentatively pried open the lid and
felt all my anxiety drain away. Nestled against the silvery gray lining lay
a beautiful rainbow pendant on a delicate silver chain. The pendant was in
the shape of an inverted triangle outlined in silver with the rainbow
colors in the middle.

	"I went with silver because you don't seem like the gold type,"
Micah said softly. "It's a pride necklace."

	"I've never seen one so beautiful."

	"I hope you like it. I've never seen you wear anything like it, but
I saw it in the store and..."

	"I love it." I leaned forward and kissed him on the lips.

	"Want me to put it on you?"

	"Please?"

	He took the box from my hands and freed the necklace. He fiddled
with the clasp until it opened, then moved around behind me on the bed and
put it around my neck. It lay perfectly in the hollow at the base of my
throat.

	"Stand up so I can see," he said in my ear.

	With a little shiver, I did as he asked.

	"You look incredible," he said with a sexy smile.

	"So do you."

	"It's a shame to let all this go to waste. What do you think about
heading over to the Inferno?"

	The Inferno was a local gay dance club. It was back in the country
in the last place you'd expect to find a club of any sort, let alone a gay
one. We'd been a few times and I'd been delighted to discover that I loved
to dance and was actually pretty good. While I was technically underage,
Micah knew the bouncer, a bulldog of a drag queen named Carmen, and I was
allowed entrance without a word. I jumped at the chance to go dancing. I
left a note for Adam telling him where Kane and I were so he wouldn't
worry, and then we left.

	If you didn't know what you were looking for, you would have never
suspected that the unassuming two-story cinder-block building surrounded by
a few pine trees and acres of field was anything other than a warehouse or
something similar. From the outside, it was quite unremarkable, no paint on
the walls and no windows to speak of. A small inconspicuous sign above the
large black metal door declared this to be the Inferno. The gravel parking
lot was full of cars, typical of a Friday night.

	Next to the door, under an overhang, a podium had been set up with
a high bar stool behind it. On the stool sat Carmen. No one who has ever
met Carmen will likely ever forget her. She was very large, for one thing,
she easily topped out at six foot six without her heals-which must have
added at least another three inches-and she was built like a tank. Her
square face would never be described as pretty, or even attractive. She
compensated for her lack of looks with an abundance of make-up and hair big
enough to have its own zip code. Tonight the wild wig she had chosen to
sport was approximately the same shade of pink as Pepto-Bismol. Her silver
sequined ankle length dress was a few sizes too small, but it was all
pulled together by the pink feather boa draped around her shoulders. Her
trademark mirror-ball earrings dangled from her ears. I couldn't see her
shoes but I knew from previous trips that I could have used them as
skis. While the Eastern Shore wasn't the most liberal part of the state,
rednecks and country bumpkins abounded, no one ever feared any trouble with
Carmen on duty. I'd heard rumors that she kept a large pistol somewhere on
her person and that she knew how to use it. I didn't doubt it for a second.

	"Well, well, well, if it isn't my favorite boys," she said waving a
large red lollipop around.

	"You say that to all the boys," Micah said with a grin.

	"You know it, honey. So Micah, darling, are you still running
around with this baby?"

	"He has a name, Carmen."

	"I know your name, don't I, Killian baby?" she said waving the
lollipop under my nose. I noticed it was shaped like a penis.

	"Hi, Carmen."

	"The baby speaks. He is a pretty one; I have to give you that. Just
be sure you hide him if the big bad police ever happen to show up."

	"I promise," Micah responded with a grin. He slipped his arm around
my waist and pulled me into the Inferno. The name was fitting. The noise
may have been the first thing to hit you as you entered, but the heat was
close behind. Once your eyes adjusted to the dim lighting and flashing
strobes, a cacophony of sight and sound awaited you. Multi-colored light
flashed, laser lights sliced through the air like light sabers, fog
machines created so much haze that you almost had to feel your way along
the dance floor where a multitude of male bodies gyrated, bumped and
grinded to the heavy beat of the dance music blasting from every
angle. Sweat and glitter sparkling on the dancers' skin created a dizzying
and mesmerizing effect.

	The décor was simple; it had an industrial look with almost
everything being made of shiny black metal. Chimney-like columns were
spaced at regular intervals around the room with flames spouting from them,
not real flames, but amazingly realistic fire made from a light gauzy
material lighted from below and blown up-wards by fans. Spiral staircases
led to a wide metal grid catwalk that went around the whole room and looked
down on the dance floor. Tiny pedestal-like tables sat near the walls, each
with four stools bolted down around it.

	I was always in awe of this place; it was so foreign to anything
I'd ever seen before. Everywhere I looked there were guys kissing,
touching, dancing, and laughing. It was a euphoric feeling.

	"Ready to dance?" Micah yelled into my ear, the only way I could
even possibly hear him over the din.

	"Hell yeah!" I responded with a shout.

	A few hours later, we slipped out the door into the fresh, cool air
outside. The party was still going strong inside, but I was completely
exhausted. Dancing is strenuous exercise and don't let anyone ever tell you
different.

	"With all that heavy breathing you two could at least be naked,"
Carmen commented lazily.

	"Don't you ever want to be inside?" I asked. I think it was the
first thing I'd ever said to her besides hello.

	"In there? Are you kidding?" she said with a laugh, "Honey, I'm way
too old for such foolishness. I'd throw out a hip or something. No, I'm
content to just sit here and breathe in the ambiance of youth and beauty."

	"Oh come on," Micah scoffed, "We both know you could dance circles
around most of those guys in there. You're healthy as a horse."

	"And just as big," she said as she produced a cigarette from her
cleavage and lit up. "Now you boys run along, it must be past the baby's
bedtime."

	"Yes, mother," I said with a grin and started for the car.

	"Sassy one, isn't he?" Carmen shot after us.

	Micah chuckled as he trotted to catch up to me. "Did you sneak one
of my drinks again tonight?" he asked, referring to the first time he'd
taken me to the Inferno and I'd been so nervous I'd fortified myself with
his drink before hitting the dance floor. "I've never seen you so playful
with Carmen."

	"Nope, all I drank was the bottled water you got me. I just figured
if she was going to dish it, she could take it. Hey, remember our first
date when you promised me if I went out with you again you'd tell me who
Carmen really was?"

	"I did?"

	"Yeah, you did."

	"Well, I lied."

	"No fair! You promised!"

	"You're the detective, you figure it out."

	"I hate when people tell me that."

* * *
	I was at the office again the next day, plugging away at the stack
of paperwork that kept building up on my desk, when Judy swept in as only
Judy could. Judy Davis is a slender, attractive woman with deceptively
normal appearance. She was a far cry from the person I'd first met several
years ago. She'd had long, brilliant red hair and favored a look that could
be the most closely described a Morticia Adams chic. I'd found out later
that the look had only been affected to intimidate her brother-in-law.

	These days, her look was much more low-key. She wore her straight
blonde hair cut off bluntly just above her shoulders and tucked behind her
ears. She was wearing a white T-shirt and jeans and looked like she'd come
from working in her garden, which she probably had. She took a great deal
of deserved pride in the tiny, but exquisite flower gardens she had created
in just the few short months she and her son Jake had been living in the
small house she'd bought after she moved here from California. She had
another son named Dash who was currently studying abroad in Australia. To
look at her, you would have never guessed she was the mother of two.

	"Hi Judy," I greeted her. "Novak is out on his case." Judy and
Novak, a widower, had been dating for a few months now and she occasionally
dropped in to see him unexpectedly.

	"I know. Actually, I'm not here to see Shane; I'm here to see you,"
she said.

	"Me?"

	"Yes, you. I need to talk to you about Jake."

	For a brief time, way back before Asher and I started dating, Jake
and I had almost become boyfriends. I'd ended up choosing Asher and Jake
and I ended up as just friends. We were barely even that these days,
though, so I couldn't imagine why Judy wanted to talk to me about him.

	"What about Jake?"

	"Well," Judy grabbed one of the chairs that sat against the walls
and dragged it over to my desk. After she settled into it, she went on,
"I'm worried about him. I think he may be doing drugs."

	"Oh, well, I really wouldn't know. We don't talk that much
anymore."

	"I didn't expect you to know. That's not why I'm here. I want you
to find out."

	"Huh?"

	"I want to hire you to find out what's going on in Jake's life."

	"Hire me?"

	"He won't talk to me. I've asked him, he won't say a word. I know
things have been hard for him since Tom and Janice died, but we've always
been able to talk, at least we could before we moved back here. I'm
beginning to think that it was a mistake."

	Tom and Janice were the people Jake had grown up thinking were his
parents. They'd both died a couple years ago and Jake had gone to live with
his birth mother, Judy, in California. They'd moved back to the Shore
earlier this year. My mind was still on the fact that Judy wanted to hire
me.

	"But wait," I interrupted her, "What about Novak, why don't you
just hire him?"

	"I think that would be make things just a little too awkward. I
mean, I'm seeing Shane and there's already enough tension between the two
of them as it is. Shane thinks I let Jake get away with too much, but he is
almost 17, I can't baby him anymore."

	"But you can hire someone to follow him around?"

	"Oh don't sound so judgmental, Killian. If he'd talk to me, I
wouldn't have to do this. He's my son; I'm worried sick about him. I've
been having...feelings-premonitions, whatever you want to call them-that he
is in danger. I don't know what sort of danger but I need to know
something. Please, will you do this for me? As a favor? Not that I won't
pay you."

	"I don't know..."

	"Please, Killian. It would mean a lot to me."

	"I just don't feel comfortable following my friend around. I mean,
I'm not even that good at this. I'm still learning."

	"Poppycock. Shane says you're a natural, that you're the best he's
ever seen even without training. I know you can do this, and I know you'll
do it well because you care for Jake too. If he's involved with drugs, or
something else illegal, his life could be in danger. If you refused to help
me and something happened to him, how would you feel?"

	Great, now I get a guilt trip. She was right, though. I knew if
anything happened to Jake after I turned her down, I'd never forgive
myself. I sighed.

	"Ok, I'll do it."

	"Thank you, Killian. But there's one more thing."

	"What's that?" I said warily.

	"I want you to keep this quiet."

	"Of course."

	"I mean from Shane."

	"You don't want me to tell Novak?"

	"No. Not yet. Let's see what's going on first."

	"It's not good to keep things from the person you're dating," I
said stubbornly. I didn't like the idea of trying to hide an investigation
from Novak.

	"Killian, darling, as much as I appreciate your concern, I don't
really need dating advice. I mean that in the kindest possible way. I know
you don't like keeping things from Shane but you'll have to trust me that
it's best for now."

	"Fine," I agreed rather grouchily. At least now I knew why'd she'd
come into to talk to me while she knew Novak would be out.

	"Please don't be upset with me. You'll understand later."

	"Whatever. How do you want me to start? Stalk him?"

	She sighed. "He gets out of school at two-thirty. I don't know
where he goes after that. He doesn't come home some nights until eight or
later. There've been a few nights when he didn't come home at all. When I
ask him where he was, he just tells me not to worry about it. If I get
angry, he tells me to mind my own business. I grounded him but it didn't
faze him in the least."

	"Can't you take his car away from him?"

	"I could, but I know he'd just find another way and at least this
way I know he's the one driving. If he is into drugs, I have to say I've
never seen him high or out of control when he gets home."

	"So what makes you think drugs? You said earlier that it could be
something else illegal. Like what?"

	"I don't even know. I just had a feeling it involved drugs. I have
no real evidence besides his erratic behavior, which could, I guess, just
be teenage rebellion. Although God knows I didn't have any problems like
this with Dashel."

	"Was Dash the perfect son?"

	Judy snorted. "No, Dash wasn't perfect, but we could talk about
anything. And he was never openly rebellious, never really into drugs or
drinking. He's Gifted too, you know. Very much so, in fact, and quite in
control of his Gifts-at least as much as one can control them. Sometimes I
think he's in better control than I am. How are you coming with yours?"

	"I'm not," I said tersely. "Back to Jake..."

	"Killian, you know you really should learn more about your Gifts. I
think they are very strong."

	"I'm not interested."

	"But you simply must! They can be dangerous if left untrained, but
they can be a marvelous tool if you know how to use them. You were given
them for a reason, you know."

	"You sound like Seth," I snapped crossly.

	"Is he still coming to see you?"

	"I hadn't seen him for a few months but he showed up the other
night."

	"Relationship problems?"

	"Actually, yeah. But he also said I should deal with my Gifts. Like
I told him though, I'd doing just fine without them."

	"Are you?"

	"Yes! I am. Now, is there anything else I need to know about Jake?"

	"You know what he drives, right?"

	"A dark blue jeep?"

	"Yes. That's all I can think of right now." She stood up and pushed
the chair back to its original position. "You'll let me know as soon as you
know something?"

	I looked into her eyes and recognized the pain and fear that she
was making an effort to hide. I nodded. "Yeah, I'll let you know as soon as
I know something."

	She bit her lip in a most un-Judy-like fashion. "Thank you."