"Susan I look like an idiot."

"That's because you have a green face mask on your pretty little face."

"This whole thing is stupid."

"Stop complaining boy or I'll sit on you."

I started laughing at that, but decided that if I didn't shut my whining Susan would probably do what she said. The mask was hard and flaking off, and I felt incredibly loco sitting at a female spa with ocean music and bowing Chinese women. Not that I had anything against getting prettied up, but I rather leave that to the female population. My eyes were covered with slipping slimy cucumber pieces and I tried not to move too much.

"We done, yes," the young woman's whose name escaped me patted my face and she talked to herself in Chinese. I let her gentle warm hand rake through my hair for a moment. Before she pulled away and took off the vegetables planted on my face. I left my eyes closed just going with the flow, and being damn grateful I wasn't paying for this fun filled day. Warm water cascaded down my cheeks, as a warm sponge brushed back and forth across my face. The water was divine and the sponge was enough rough but gentle too. Feeling relaxed for the first time being here, I relaxed my shoulders and let the pretty woman do her thing.

It would have been so much easier to fall for the girl who was scrubbing my pores. Quiet, gentle and sweet like me. Probably smart too, not because of her heritage but she seemed like an intelligent person, despite her English being broken. I had the sudden urge to ask her out. But the thought made me smile. I was too gay for that. Which made me laugh out aloud.

"Whatcha laughing at boy," came Susan's voice.

"Nothing," she seemed to take my answer and didn't say anything else. The last remnants of my face mask was wiped off my face, as a dry towel patted my face. She said something again and I opened my eyes. She gave me a warm smile and picked up a tub of cream, and swiped a finger in the creamy substance before massaging it in her own hands. I watched her as she placed both her greasy hands on my cheeks and began massaging the cream into my skin. I groaned out aloud feeling warm and relaxed as she massaged my cheeks, neck and forehead. She spent ten minutes going back and forth before slapping her hands and cleaning them on a wash towel.

"You relax," she said to me and I said something that probably wasn't English as I fell into a light slumber.

----

Insistent patting made me want to shout at whoever was trying to wake me up. I was warm and relaxed and free for the first time I had come to New York. But that damn hand wasn't giving up.

"Wh...?"

"Get up Princess you've been drooling for half an hour and we gotta get our pedicures and manicures done."

I groaned as Susan stood in front of me in a towel and her hair wrapped up in a make-shift turban. I nodded my head and got up off the leather pull down chair and stood up, yawning loudly and blinking deeply.

"Do I need too ---"

"Yes. You need to do everything I say so stop being such a broken record."

I shrugged my shoulders and followed her to the small tables at the back of the beauty parlour. I sat down and leaned back against the warm chair. A young woman, whose name tag said Kayla came down and sat in front of me. She picked up my hand and examined the bitten nails and scrunched her nose up in distaste.

"Men," she said to Susan who nodded sympathetically. I rolled my eyes. A woman named Patricia sat in front of Susan and all the three started chattering about clothes, boys and work. I zoned them out and let Kayla file and buffer my nails, until they sparkled like hidden diamonds. It took at least two hours for the woman to be done with me, and I almost slapped her. Susan bid the women good-bye and hauled me to the front chairs that were used to cut hair.

"What the hell, I've spent at least four hours here. I'm about to die," I moaned. Susan gave me the finger and took off her turban letting her hair fall down.

"It takes time."

"Its wrong."

"What? You rather be sitting in your room moping about Jay and Jea. Please."

"I'm not trying to be ungrateful."

"Well you sure are acting it."

"Jesus, Susan I may be gay but that doesn't mean I'm your flaming queen girlfriend all of a sudden."

"Never said that friend, I'm just trying to make you feel better. Sorry if it came off like that," replied Susan briskly. I felt like a bastard.

"I'm sorry. But can you understand where I'm coming from?"

"No, not really. There is nothing wrong with hygiene."

I laughed, "No. I guess not."

"Enough of the this lame blaming, having good hair and nice nails don't make you effeminate. Just groomed."

"Okay, you win."

"Thank you."

"Now do you want highlights or what Princess?"

-----

Another two hours later and Susan and I emerged from J'adore plucked, pulled and preened, and Susan a thousand dollars poorer. But I had to admit, I felt and looked great, and Susan looked amazing. Her hair was cut shorter, and sharper framing her face. Her skin glowed and her nails shined. My usual brown hair, that had gotten shaggy and unkempt became shorter, neater, layered and spiked. My skins felt clean and fresh, my back feeling less twisted and my nails looked pretty damn nice.

"Okay I admit this was a good idea. I can't believe you paid that much though."

"All in the name of beauty. You look delicious and I would hump you right here, if you didn't mind. But you're a big prude so lets go shopping."

"No Susan, I don't need any clothes."

Before she could say anything her little phone began to ring and she fiddled with her small handbag before pulling out her mobile phone.

"Yeah?"

"Right."

"Good. Thanks."

I frowned at her weird conversation as she closed her phone and put it back into her bag, "What was that about?" I asked not usually a nosey person.

"Jay and Jea are heading to Phoenix for drinks and a game of pool probably."

"What the hell is Phoenix."

"Prominently a gay bar, but anyone whose willing to be secure with their sexuality can go too." I laughed at that but quickly stopped and glared at Susan.

"Who the hell was that and how did you even gather a stalk squad. I've been with you all day."

"Darling, you're with Susan anything can happen."

"Susan..."

"Leave it out will you. Your whining is not becoming."

"I don't want to do this."

"What make Jay realise what a prick he is? And Jea what kind of friend he is? We'll do this, maybe a hottie will pick you up or maybe not, but you need to get out. You're here for four years Alex, sitting in that room and studying whilst being in the worlds most celebrated and loved city is just wrong."

"It's New York not the Tag Mahal."

"Whatever! Us American like making New York more than it really is."

"Which is?"

"Its fucking dirty."

I laughed and hugged Susan thanking whoever the hell bought me her. I nodded my head, grabbed her hand and dragged her back to her car which was parked a litte way from the spa and demanded her to step on it as we spend off to the nearest mall.

----

The shopping didn't take too long, the amount of stuff Susan bought for me made me guilty. She said no to everything and anything I tried to pay for and I wondered where the hell she was getting all her money from?

"I'm a trust fund brat. I get six thousand a month, but my bastard of a brother gets ten." I almost chocked on my own spit as she moaned about her brother getting anything and everything he wanted.

"Not that I don't love him, but why does he get an allowance like that? I mean he works has a good job too you know."

"I'm speechless."

She laughed, "I'm not that bad, but hell I have the money why not splash it on the people I care about. But when the bill comes you gotta say to my parents that you're my boyfriend and we were role-playing."

I stopped walking and looked at her in shock.

"Kidding, geez. Don't worry their used to their kids spending on other people too. Just ask my brother anyone he dates boy or girl he buys them so much stuff. We're just generous."

"You're brother is bi?"

"Yup, been bi since he was six," laughed Susan, "It was good though you know. My dad had something to psychoanalyse and my mum had something to gloat about. For me I got to talk about bitchy girls and hot boys."

"Sounds like fun," I said smiling, "How old is he?"

"Twenty-three, finished his Criminal Law degree last year, works at one of those prestigious and evil Law firms."

"Do you think he'll go for me," I said laughing. Susan stopped and I frowned at her, "You know he's been going through some rough pathces with gold-digging women for the last two years. I told him he should start dating guys again you know. But he kept saying they were bad enough too. Gym bunnies and such."

"I was kidding."

"No, hell he's coming over next weekend maybe you should meet. Oh hell that'll be brilliant."

I started to panic, there was no way I'd date or even consider going out with Susans' brother, "Come on it was a joke."

"My brother is gorgeous and he'll love you. You just need to get that stick out your ass, because he may be a swave laywer but he's twenty three and he has his fun."

"No Susan."

"Okay just come and see him, that's all. We're having a barbeque and I was going to invite you anyway. Say yes."

"Fine."

"That was easy."

"Was there any point in fighting with you?" I asked annoyed.

"Good point."

-----

We decided to get changed at Susan's room, not wanting to run in with Jay at our own. We layed down all our purchased items and put a few on, for awhile it was fun but then I started to get annoyed. Laughing we finally settled on my outift whilst Susan started to re-apply some make-up and slip into a slutty black number. She looked hot, with her dress riding high, long legs and hair down. God being a woman seemed so much more fun and easy sometimes.

I pulled on my new Levi skinny jeans and almost laughed out aloud. They were nice but I felt slightly stupid. Picking up my black Liquor band Jinx shirt, I pulled it on and grabbed my new white converse high tops and started to lace them up. Standing up I looked at myself in Susan's long mirror, and was almost shocked at the person now. I looked simply put. Hot.

"My, my mister don't we look edible."

I turned around and whistled at Susan making her laugh and twirl for me, "We look great and its all thanks to you."

"Oh shush you, we're going to have fun, clothes and relaxation can do you a world of wonder. But seriously you looked amazing. Jay will probably be tongue tied, heck so will Jea."

I shrugged my shoulders, grabbing the necessities such as phones, keys and money we made out way out of the dorm laughing and joking.

----

Having a car in New York was pointless, as pointless as it was in London. Traffic everywhere people wandering all over the roads. These people had balls, and the taxi drivers were just plain mad. But we got to Phoenix a little later but nevertheless we go there. Alive.

"Why do you even drive?" I asked Susan as we parked and got out, making our way down the busy streets.

"Public transport and I don't agree."

"You ever been on any?"

"No. They smell."

"Brat."

You know it."

Susan and I approached Phoenix and I started to feel nervous. This was stupid I had nothing to prove, I didn't want Jay, he was good looking but their were more fish in the seas, surely I wasn't that pathetic.

"You know we don't need to do this. Say it and we'll go," I looked at Susan and her eyes told me she was serious. She would never force me to do anything I didn't want too. But we'd come this far, and if it was pathetic so be it. I would rile Jay up, and have fun at the same time. Two deals for the price of one. Come on.

"No. I'm anything but a chicken shit." Susan smiled brightly and grabbed my hand as we made our way into the bar. It looked dark from the outside, but as we got in the place was brightly lit, with spacious room, a long bar, a funky jukebox, rock music blaring and pretty nice wallflowers tending, walking and serving.

"Not bad," I mouthed at Susan who giggled. She let go of my hand and we wandered in more. She was looking for Jay and Jea and made sure she wasn't obvious. She stopped and came back to me.

"Back booth, looking cozy the fuckers. We'll just take the one slightly near them. Walk with me and don't look at them. Talk and make it real."

"You done this before?" I asked laughing nervously as we neared their booth.

"Baby you have no idea what I've done before," I grinned at Susan as we walked to our booth and sat down. My palms were sweaty and my heart was hammering like a choo-choo train in my chest.

"You're flushed. How adorable."

I showed her my middle finger.

I kept my eyes focused on Susan who ordered as some coke, legally I could drink at home but the law in America apparently didn't agree.

"I need a beer," I said.

"Enough of the drama, we'll drink and thet'll we'll play pool. Told the nice man to keep us a table. You know how to play pool right?"

"Yeah."

"Cool. We need that tight ass of yours high and available."

"Now you're making me a prostitute?"

"Earning money ain't ever wrong Princess."

I grinned, and was glad when our drinks arrived, taking a huge gulp, I let the ice cold fizzed out drink hit the back of my throat.

"Are they looking?"

"Yes. But calm down yea we gotta make this look real."

"I feel stupid."

"Stop saying that. They're about four guys at the bar giving you the evil eye, and you're having a heart failure for jerk boy over there."

"Evil eye?"

"You know, the naughty look. God they wanna bang you. Simple enough."

I laughed, nodding my head.

"Drink up and lets hit the tables before their taken. I nodded my head and finished my drink before getting up and following Susan to one of the tables. She set it out and I took a cue, looking at it and then grabbed some chalk to smudge on the end. I was good at snooker nothing great but I held my own. We started our game, Susan breaking first and I slowly felt myself relax.

We gathered an audience, Susan whispered obscene things in my ear as a few men sort of fondled me. I laughed them off, and blushed hard at Susan. I could feel a pair of eyes on me, knowing Jay was watching was making me feel weird and happy at the same time. The game was fun but intense andI lowered my body against the table, my backside jutting out as I tried to make a hard corner shot.

"Now that's beautiful," said one of the guys and I faltered a little when everyone yelled `hell yes'. I sighed deeply and pushed at my body some more ignoring the cat calls and Susan's loud laugh. Aiming my cue I hit the white ball and watched it glide softly across the felt as it hit the blue ball before it rolled and tucked itself in the corner neatly.

I pushed off the table and raised my arms, laughing as Susan gaped at me, and then pouted. I had effectively won the game, and a round of appaluse and drinks were aimed and given to me. I smiled and chatted with a few guys, getting way too many numbers but as a true gentlemen I pocketed them all and giggled with Susan.

"Good game," I looked up at Jay whose eyes were beautiful as ever. Jea stood a little behind him, and gave me a tight smile. I nodded at him and shrugged my shoulders at Jay.

"I can play, but never really thought about it much."

"Good skills."

I shrugged again.

"You look different," he said quietly.

"Hair cut. Needed one bad," I said lamely. I could see Susan glaring at Jea and I resisted the urge to laugh.

"What you guys up too?" I asked sipping a drink some blonde hunk bought me.

"We're on a date, "piped in Jea, and Jay frowned.

"Cool. Having a nice time?" I asked Jea.

"Of course," Jea said quickly.

"Cool."

"Coming back to the room tonight?" Asked Jay. But before I could answer Mr. Blonde hunk wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close. I laughed at him as he nipped my ear.

"Beautiful is coming home with me," he said slyly. I laughed again. The man was cool, he was just teasing. But when I turned around Jay and Jea were no longer standing in front of me, but were hightailing out of the bar.

"Plan worked then?" I said to Susan.

"I think that's an understatement." I raised and eyebrow ans settled back against Blonde Guy whose name was Jeff and felt good for the first time when it came to Jay and his roller coaster ride.

------

Phoenix is a gay bar in New York.

Alex's Out fit: jeans t-shirt

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