The Club and The Rival

I was on a high.

Sad as it maybe, but this was the closest thing I ever had to gay sex, and despite the circumstances it didn't mean I hadn't enjoyed the experience. It started off absurd I might add, with my roommate high on something that I'm sure wasn't even legal. I had to admit that the kissing was the best thing. Jay's mouth was a master piece. The man could still kiss like a pro even when he was smashed out of his head. The jerking off was fast and a bit sloppy but feeling his dick around my hand was amazing. But Jay's loud snore kind of ruined the moment. I'm not some girl that wanted this big meaningful feeling in the pit of my stomach. I mean he was out of his mind, so really how meaningful could it have been anyway?

I rolled of the bed and trudged over to the other side and lay on my own bed. I may have not have had the experience to tell me this, but there have been enough novels written about how the drunken and high ones never remember what happened the night before, so it's best just to leave it at that. I looked over at the time and it just ticked seconds passed ten. Not a first for me to be in bed at that time. Nope I had seen many Friday nights looking at either my ceiling or the television. It was funny to see Jay snoring on the other side. Whatever he took must have been strong. I don't know if I'll ask him about it, I've never been a big advocate about being against drugs, I had seen many of my friends deal with stronger stuff than whatever put Jay to sleep. Despite how the evening ended with a small argument with Jea and a weird make out session with Jay - I had to admit that it's been a pretty great and weird night all at the same time.

*

My head was pounding, and I knew why. I had taken some happy pills that Pete had given me the night before and my poor head was paying for my stupidity. But I couldn't help it. If I didn't take something to clam me down, I was going to kill someone and I'm too young to be going to jail. I gingerly sit up on my bed and look around the darkened room. I was glad that the curtains were drawn, the sun in New York could be a bitch at times.

"Hey. Good morning," said Alex quietly which I was grateful for.

"Hey man. Who used my head as a ball," I replied. Alex game me a warm smile. He sat down on my bed handing me some white pills and a glass of water.

"I guess you need these."

I reached over and took the nice pills that would take away my pounding headache go away. Hopefully to Africa.

"Thanks," I said after I took my pills. I leaned back on my bed and realised that Alex must have known that I was smashed when he came back...when we were suppose to go to the club.

"Oh man! I'm sorry we were suppose to go out last night," I said groaning.

"Don't worry about it. We can go another time," he said smiling. I loved his smile, it was so innocent and so shy.

"No. we're going out tonight. Man I was messed up last night."

Alex nodded, "Yes you were."

I also realised that he must have known I was high and not drunk, "You don't seem too shocked or disappointed in me."

Alex shrugged, "I'm not your mother. A lot of my mates did drugs back home, it's not like you were the first person I came across that did them."

I was slightly shocked I used some hard drugs when I was much younger but I kicked that habit before I became some junkie, "Hey! Look man I'm not hooked on drugs. I only use it sometimes when I'm stressed," I defended myself.

"Jay I'm not judging you. Why would I do that? All I meant was that I may be a kid from Ireland who lives in the countryside but it doesn't mean I haven't come across drugs before."

I sighed loudly and took in his point, "So you ever done drugs?" I asked.

"Me? No that's just not who I am. I deal with things differently."

I chuckled, "Really. What do you do?"

"I contemplate," he said simply.

"Huh? What do you contemplate?" I asked confused.

"Whatever I'm stressed about. I have to contemplate what's making me feel upset or down and do something to get rid of it. Always worked for me."

"I wish I could do that," I mused quietly.

Alex shrugged, "Maybe you can try talking about it instead?"

I looked over at him, and saw him smile at me softly. He wasn't pushing for anything, then again Alex never pushed me to do anything. He never followed me around like the other kids did, he didn't need the urge to spend time with me... he didn't need anything from me.

"Why don't we hang out at all?"

Alex blinked at me, probably because I just changed the conversation so abruptly. He shrugged again and gave me a small smile, "I guess we just run in different circles."

"Yeah. You run with Jea"? I said with a huff.

"Nothing to be petulant about. He's the first person I clicked with when I came here. He's a good guy."

"So something going on between you two?" I asked slowly - strangely dreading the answer.

"Hell no. He's a friend - almost a best friend," said Alex grinning, "Well I hope we are..."

"Why?"

"...We kind a had a fight last night, and I said some stuff. But only because he was grating on my last nerve."

I laughed at his explanation, he really wasn't one to hurt anyone's feelings, "What was the fight about?"

"You," he said shortly.

"Huh?"

"You kinda broke his heart, and he sorta got jealous when I said I was going to a club with you. I wish he'd get over you already - it's annoying."

I looked down at my hands starting to feel bad, "I really didn't mean to hurt him. I can be an ass at times like that."

Alex nodded, "Sure you can. But you should talk to Jea and get the record straight. He needs some closure."

"I'll talk to him later on. I promise."

"Cool. Anyway I've got class in half an hour so I'm going to go. I'll see you later tonight?"

"For definite man, I am taking you to the best club in New York."

He grinned at me causing his whole face to light up in happiness, "Great. See you at..."

"Eight", I said, "We'll go for dinner and then we'll head to the club."

"That sounds great," he said softly, and I couldn't help but admire him - his accent came out so much softer and his eyes glowed. Damn it didn't take much to please him, and I kinda liked that.

*

Classes were a big bitch today, or maybe it was the fact I just couldn't wait until the day was over and go out with Jay. Susan asked if she could come along with me and Jay, I obviously said no. She was a little hurt about it but I wanted to spend some time with Jay myself. I'll make it up to her later. I had a math test coming up in two weeks time, and I still hadn't studied for it. I decided to head to the library and get some done before heading out tonight. It was a weekday and not a brilliant time to party when I had an eleven o'clock lecture the next day but I came here for fun and experience, and it didn't matter if I didn't go to sleep before eleven.

I loved the universities library it was so big and spacious. I loathed small crapped study halls, where someone sat next to you. I made my way up the third level and headed towards the back of the hall and sat down beside the window seat. The day was bright and beautiful and I've always liked studying near natural light. Dumping my bag on the table I gave the area a quick glance over. It was pretty quiet for three in the afternoon. A couple of girls sat a few rows behind me whispering quietly to each other. I had a few hours to study and I was going to make up for it as much as I could.

*

Alex had left for his classes at ten and I slept for an hour before getting up. My head felt a bit better, but my stomach felt queasy and my eyes felt raw. I had cried for two hours before I had gotten myself smashed up. Just another day in my family's drama. I grabbed some clean clothes and headed for the shower to get cleaned up, my skin felt rough and I stank like hell. Letting the warm water pound down on me, I felt slightly better and my stomach calmed down some what. Getting out I quickly dried myself and dressed in the bathroom, giving my teeth a quick brush I made my way out of the bathroom saying a few hellos to passer-by's.

As I opened my door, my cell phone gave a shrill ring and winced at the loud sound. Quickly picking it up from my bedside table I didn't even bother to check the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"Jay? It's your father."

I gave a weary sigh, "What is it?"

"Son, I'm sorry."

"Whatever dad it's the same old thing isn't it. I don't care about you or mom."

"You don't mean that."

"Yes I do dad. The only reason why I come home or even bother with this family is because off the boys and that's all. I thought you would protect them."

"Of course I do, and I will but it was a mistake on her part she didn't mean it."

"No she forgot that alcohol wasn't milk and that the kids had to go to hospital to get their stomachs pumped. You're a bastard and so is she. I wish you guys were never allowed to have children."

"Son..."

"Fuck off dad, and don't call me." I snap my phone shut and close my eyes fighting back tears. I hated the fact I couldn't protect my brothers. I hated that I was so helpless and I hated the fact that I would always lose against them two. Deciding to forget last night I pick up my bag and head out the room, and make my way to my first lecture of the day. I'd do something about the kids at the weekend.

*

I was glad I went to my lecture, it was pretty vital for the tests we had coming up. I'd be finished up by four, plenty of time for my date with Alex. The more I thought about the guy, the more I thought of him as boyfriend material. I liked sleeping around, I did it because the people I slept around with were just that. One night stands and nothing more. I guess I stuck with Jea because he was beautiful and made me laugh, he was sweet and always tried to make me happy. I felt guilty with the way I treated him - he didn't deserve the way I spoke to him. There is only so much I can blame on my mother.

I take out my cell phone and scroll down my contact lists until Jea's name came to view. I hesitated for a second before pushing the call button. The phone rang four times and I was about give up before a sleep hello sounded through.

"Hi Jea. It's me Jay."

The line from the other end was quiet for a few seconds, "What do you want?"

"I want to talk to you."

"Why?" He asks.

"To clear the air, please man let me make it up to you," I almost plead.

He sighs, "I'm at home. You know the way."

"Thanks I'll be there soon," I snap my phone close and decide to ditch my next lecture.

*

I arrive at Jea's place in record time, he buzzes me up and I let myself in almost scared about our meeting. I owed it to Alex and Jea to make up. The door was open as I made my way up, and I let myself in closing the door behind me. His place was pretty spectacular with it matching his personality.

"Hi," I turn around and look at Jea whose standing beside the door frame with a confused look. He looked amazing, with skin tight jeans and a red top his blonde hair looks even brighter against the rich colour. I don't why but all logic flies out the window. I closed the gap between us and I grab him in a heated kiss. He gasped in shock and his body tensed with fear and intrigue. I dropped my bag and pulled Jea closer to me, smashing our bodies and mouths impossibly closer. He finally relented and kissed me back, almost like he had been starved of them. He wrapped his arms around my neck and I pick him, his legs automatically going around my waist as I carry him to his bedroom.

In the back of my mind, I knew this was wrong.

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