Date: Sat, 11 Jan 2003 21:30:10 -0500 From: John Paul Subject: The Alphabet Lovers: Colin There's an unwritten law that when you break up with someone, no matter how amicably, you break up with their friends too. You're allowed to engage in occasional friendly banter with them, but any meaningful bonding is strictly prohibited. Any attempts by one of your ex's friends to maintain a friendship violates their code of loyalty. Such was the case when I broke up with Adam. Half the people that I had grown so fond of, and had so much fun hanging out with, suddenly vanished from my life. As sad as it was, I understood that that's the way it had to be. Of all of Adam's friends, I missed Colin the most. Colin and Adam were friends from birth. They were like brothers -- the closest thing to a sibling that either of them would ever have. Actually, they were more like twins; they dressed alike, talked alike and even shared the same birthday. They looked like brothers too. Colin was a smidgen taller and less muscular than Adam. His hair was a darker blond and his eyes were light brown compared to Adam's baby blues, but there was still a certain familial resemblance. Oh yeah, and they fought like brothers. Colin was hot-headed and impetuous; Adam was a level-headed perfectionist. Most of the time, their differences would balance out, but when they didn't... oh yeah, it got ugly. Their fights were legendary on campus. There were many times when a simple spat escalated into screaming, punching, and wrestling. They'd go at each other for hours then, as suddenly as the fight began, they'd come to a truce and go about their merry ways. Theirs was a bond so deep that few people truly understood it, especially their significant others. I have to admit, it took a lot of self-confidence to cope with their unique friendship. I'm about as secure as they come and sometimes even I found myself jealous of the affection they shared. Even though Colin was straight, and there was no chance of sexual infidelity, I sometimes felt like Adam loved Colin more than me. But, as my relationship with Adam grew, so did my friendship with Colin. Slowly, I began to understand the nature of their kinship and eventually I regarded Colin as my brother too. Colin depicted himself as sort of a slacker, but I saw him for the smart and caring person that he really was. I often went to him for advice, especially on matters concerning Adam. He always had some sage advice or at least a good joke to make it all better. Sometimes, we'd stay up all night, just the two of us, and talk about anything and everything. I missed those talks a lot. I thought about calling him after the break-up, but we all know the rules. Even though Colin rarely obeyed rules of etiquette, he was intensely loyal to his friends -- especially Adam. This was one rule I was sure he'd never break. So, you can imagine my surprise when he called one night, after almost a year of silence. "Hey JP, what's kickin' bro?" "Colin?" No one else called me JP. "Oh my God, how the hell are you?" "Aw, you know me, I'm chill." "Man, I was just thinking about how much I miss talking to you." "Yeah, me too. I've thought about calling you a million times." "Yeah, so why didn't you?" I asked. "The same reason you haven't called me jackass," he rebutted. "Good point." I thought about his response for a minute then asked, "So why did you call?" For a minute there was only the quiet hum of the telephone line. "I was just calling to check on you. I wanted to see how you were doing after... well, you know." Yes, at last, there was the inevitable conversation that I wanted so badly to avoid. "I'm doing okay." "No, really, how are you?" "I'm fine... seriously. What choice do I have anyway? I'm not ready to give up this life and Adam deserves better. He deserves to have a boyfriend who is home more than two months out of the year." "That's bullshit, man! You two could have made it work, but you didn't even try." "Colin..." "No, man, I mean it. You two are so right for each other. Shit, I wish I had a relationship like you two had. But you just threw it all away." "Colin..." "We're supposed to be family, for Christ's sake! We were supposed to be together forever, bro... the three of us. You don't just break up a family like that. It's fucking bullshit, bro!" "Colin, stop!" I begged, trying to fight back the tears. "I don't need this right now." "You sound just like Adam, talking about what he doesn't need. Well, what about me, huh? Do either of you give a fuck about what I need? I hate both of you, you fucking drama queens!" He slammed the phone down so hard I can still hear the ringing in my ear. Let me tell you, you can't express that kind of rage with a cordless phone. I'd heard Colin worked up before, but there was an uncharacteristic pang of bitterness and despair in his voice. I had learned that it's best to give Colin time to cool off when he's riled up, but I couldn't let it rest. I called him back. "What?!" he yelled into the phone. "Colin, listen, I think we need to talk about what's bothering you." "Oh, now you want to talk about me? Fuck you! I don't have anything else to say." "Then why'd you answer the phone?" I heard his indignant huff on the other end. "Okay, you wanna talk? I'm listening," he growled. "Not over the phone," I said, "and certainly not in public," I added, trying to avoid a public spectacle. "Can I come over?" He hesitated for a minute. "Alright," he finally relented and hung up again. I took a deep breath, got dressed and walked outside. I was going to drive over at first, but Colin only lived a few blocks away and the long walk would give me time to think and him time to cool down. He also lived a few doors down from Adam. I should've asked him to come over instead. When I turned the corner to their block, I carefully scoped the area. Adam's car was parked in front of his house but the house lights were off. Avoiding all streetlights, I walked very quickly to Colin's house and rang the doorbell. It took him forever to answer. I pushed my way inside and slammed the door shut behind me. Colin stood by door, glaring at me with his arms crossed. I hardly recognized him. He was normally so neat and dressed to the nines, but he looked completely disheveled standing in the dimly lit foyer. He had on a pair of boxers and a ratty robe; he looked like he hadn't shaved in a few days; and his hair was mussed up all over his head. He'd been crying... and drinking too. I couldn't tell over the phone -- he sounded completely sober even when he was piss drunk -- but I could smell it on his breath. "You look like shit," I blurted out. "And you're drunk." "I'm not drunk... yet. If you're going to lecture me, you can turn around and go back home... save us both the grief." "No, I came over here to find out what's going on with you." "I told you what's going on," he said as he walked into the living room and fell face first into the sofa. There were discarded tissues and empty beer bottles all over the room. It was like a scene from a bad Lifetime movie. "I know you're pissed because we broke up, but why now? It's been eight months." "Do you know what today is?" he asked turning onto his back. I thought about it for a minute then sighed. "Yeah, it's pool night." "That's right. We used to play every week. Do you know we've missed 31 pool nights?" "Is that what this is all about; a stupid pool game?" He sat up, popped open another bottle and took a swig. "You don't get it, do you? Adam didn't get it either. It's not about the game, it's about US!" He slammed the bottle on the table. I sat down beside him and put my arm around him. I didn't know what else to do. "I miss you so much JP," he said and rested his head on my shoulder. He sobbed quietly as I stroked his hair. "I miss you too," I whispered. We sat there for a couple of hours -- arguing, talking, and saying nothing at all -- until he eventually dozed. I tried to stand up to get a blanket for him, but his head was on my lap and one arm was draped over my legs. He woke up as soon as I moved. "Where are you going?" "I was going to get a blanket for you... then I was going to go home." "No, you can't leave yet. We're not done talking." "It's 3:00 and I'm exhausted. I'll come back tomorrow and we can talk some more." "You can sleep here. Come on," he said, jumping up off the sofa and tugging on my arm. "You can sleep in my bed. Just... please don't go." He looked so miserable. I'd never seem him like that. So, against my better judgment, I agreed. I followed him to his bedroom. I kicked off my shoes while he busied him with something in his dresser. "You can wear these," he said, handing me a pair of red pajamas. "Thanks," I said and took them from him. They'd never been worn, which was no surprise since Colin slept in boxers or nothing at all -- as did I. I figured he was trying to be modest since we weren't technically friends anymore. I waited for him to leave the room so I could change. I'd undressed in front of him countless times before, but again, that's when we were friends. He walked over to me when he saw that I wasn't making any effort to change my clothes. "You're tired. Here, let me help you," he said and started unbuttoning my shirt. I know I should have stopped him, but I couldn't -- or maybe I didn't want to. Instead, I watched him methodically open each button. He tugged the shirt out of my pants and undid the last two buttons. My shirt fell open exposing my chest to the cool air. My nipples reacted immediately to the sensation. It seemed intentional the way he brushed his hands over them to slip the shirt off my shoulders. Surely, it was just my imagination. I looked into his eyes which were focused on my bare torso. I didn't take my eyes off of his, not even when he reached down to unbutton my pants. I was trying to read his face so that I could figure out what was going on in his head. He unzipped my pants and they fell to the floor. I stepped out of them and kicked them aside. Something about us standing there, less than six inches apart, wearing next to nothing, must have compelled him to kiss me because that's exactly what he did. I didn't resist, like any sane person would have. Instead, I kissed him back. I remember thinking how wrong it was to be kissing my ex-boyfriend's straight, best friend. I also remember thinking how good it felt. His kiss was soft but needy. I knew it was wrong, but I wanted so badly to gratify that need. "We're going to regret this in the morning," I said when his lips parted from mine. "We'll worry about it then," he said, stepping me backwards into the bed. I fell onto the mattress and he fell on top of me. He kissed me again while his hands clumsily explored my body. His fingers meandered over my chest, down my stomach, and stopped at the waistband of my boxers. He continued to kiss me but I could sense that he was nervous by his ragged breathing. I guided his hand back to my chest, to let him know he didn't have to do this. He pulled his hand away and slipped it into my boxers, taking a hold of my semi-erect dick. I couldn't believe what was happening. I'd never had feelings like this for Colin before -- he was my brother. What we were doing was practically incest. On top of that, he was straight. There was no doubt in my mind that Colin wasn't into guys. So why was he doing this? I stopped caring the minute he shoved his tongue into my mouth. My cock immediately grew to full mast in his hand. He gave it a good squeeze then started stroking it. It was getting crowded in my boxers with his big hand and my hard prick vying for space. I wiggled my way out of them to give him more room to play. Colin broke away from the kiss to look at the spoils of his labor. "This is so weird," he said, still pumping my dick in his fist. "We don't have to do this, you know," I replied feebly. "I know, but I want to." He spit into his hand and used it to work my meat a little faster. I laid back and enjoyed the forbidden pleasure he was giving me. He alternated between short, quick, up-and-down strokes and long twisting strokes. He used to joke about jacking off a lot -- the way he was working my poke, I knew there was some truth to it. I looked down to watch the action and noticed that his own dick was rock hard and poking out of his boxers. "Your turn," I said and wrestled him onto his back. I sat on his chest, facing his feet, and leaned forward until I was eye-to-eye with his throbbing monster. His dick was a good seven inches -- the perfect size for sucking in my opinion. I licked the head and waited for his reaction. His hips lifted off the bed immediately, forcing his cock into my awaiting mouth. It slid in smoothly, all the way down to the balls. I proceeded to suck and slurp on his tasty cock to the sounds of Colin's moans of delight. "Adam said you were a good cocksucker," he disclosed, "but I had no idea..." What the fuck?! I couldn't believe Adam talked to Colin about his sex life. More importantly, I couldn't believe he talked to Colin about his sex with ME. Every time my head bobbed up and down on Colin's pole I got a little angrier. I was just about to call it quits when I felt Colin's hands on my ass. He spread it open and spit on my pucker hole. Then he pushed the all-natural lube up my ass with his finger. I gasped and his dick fell out of my mouth. "Yeah, I like it when a girl plays with my ass too," he confided as his digit tickled the inside of my ass. "Mm hmm," I moaned, popping his dick back in my mouth. "It's tight up there," he mused, pushing a second finger into my chute. "You like getting fucked?" "Mm hmm," I moaned again, steadily slurping down his cock. I knew where he was going with his questioning. "You think maybe you'd let me fuck you?" he asked, twisting his fingers in, out and around my tight rectum. "I thought you'd never ask," I said, letting his spit-soaked cock slide out of my mouth. Before he could act, I spun around so that we were face-to-face and impaled myself on his unsuspecting pole. He yelped and I groaned from the sensation of first penetration. He was ready to thrust and blow, but it had been a while since I let someone fuck me and I wanted to savor that full feeling that I remembered so fondly. I bore down on him with my full weight, forcing every inch of him into me, and slowly clenched and released my ass muscles. "Woo hoo, that's tight!" he bellowed, still intent on thrusting into me. I leaned back and gave him what he wanted. He watched intently as his dick slid out of my hole then disappeared back into its tight depths. I wiggled and bucked my hips slowly to increase his enjoyment... and mine. Colin's face contorted as I threw my ass on him. I knew this was the best fuck he'd ever had and I knew it'd be his quickest. His moans grew louder and more frequent and his face turned bright red. He was close to the edge. "Oh yeah, JP, give me that sweet little ass! Ooo, it's so fucking good. Come on, faster... faster..." He wrapped his fist around my pole and started wanking it. That was all the incentive I needed to fuck my brains out with his cock. A shiver so strong ran through his body that I could feel him tremble beneath me. He flooded my ass with his hot sticky load and his throbbing dick pressed against my prostate. A few more cranks on my prick and he Colin triggered my own orgasm. I blasted stream after stream of cum all over his chest, stomach and hand. I kissed him one last time then collapsed in a heap beside him. We drifted off to sleep; he with the most devilish, shit-eating grin of contentment on his face, and I with the visage of worry. I woke up the next morning in an empty bed. I threw on my clothes and walked downstairs to find Colin. He was sitting in the kitchen, drinking a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. He looked like his usual self: sober, clean-shaven, freshly-dressed, and well-coiffed. "Good morning." He put the paper down and greeted me with a smile. "Did you sleep well?" he asked. "Yeah, how about you?" "Like a baby," he answered. "Want some coffee?" "Sure." As he poured the coffee, I thought about what had happened and started having the morning-after pangs of guilt. "Colin," I mumbled, "about last night..." "Last night just happened, okay?" He placed the mug in front of me and grabbed my hand. "I don't regret what we did, but I think it's in everybody's best interest if we just move on." "Yeah, I suppose... but how do we move on?" "I don't know. We'll figure it out as we go along. All I know is that I miss having you around. I know things are kinda dicey between you and Adam, but that's your problem. I don't feel like having to choose between my two best friends while they try to pull their heads out their asses." I didn't know what to say, so I just nodded. He smiled, gave me a kiss on the cheek and went back to reading his paper. From that day on, my relationship with Colin grew better and stronger. He's even helped ease the tension between me and Adam -- we're going to share the duty of Best Man at Colin's wedding next month. I hope his fiancée never gets a hold of this story.