I'm not out of shape, and I am not a smoker, but I was breathing
pretty hard by the time I reached my doorway. "Damn," I cursed to
myself as I fumbled in my pocket for the magnetic key card. "That
is still one hell of a walk from the elevator."
Retrieving the key card, I was just about to slide it though the slot
when I was surprised by a soft feminine voice behind me. "Mr.
"Yes," I answered jumping slightly and looking over my shoulder at the
young lady who had walked up silently behind me.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," she said apologetically,
extending a white plastic shopping bag as she continued. "Your
"Already!," I exclaimed, fumbling with the bag and almost dropping it
and my key card.
"Yes, Sir," she replied politely. "May I help you with the door?"
"No thanks, I can manage," I responded, panicking at the thought that
might be inside.
"Yes, Sir, have a pleasant evening," she answered, turning and leaving
as silently as she had come.
I waited for a moment or two as she left before opening the door and
entering. The beds had not been converted to a queen size as
Petrik had said he would do, and a feeling of disappointment settled
over me. "I guess he was busy and forgot about it," I thought as
I extracted the bottle of JD from the plastic shopping bag.
There was still ice in the thermos bucket; and, after fixing
myself a drink, I sat on the edge of the bed closest to me and removed
my shoes before taking my clothes off. After hanging my things
in the closet, I started to reach for my robe and then decided against
it thinking, "the briefs are good enough since there is no one to hide
After checking the various switches to see what they controlled, I
settled on two small wall sconces that left the room in a soft
light. "They think of everything when they build these ships," I
thought, taking a sip of my drink. "My own bedroom lighting is
For a moment a feeling of melancholy swept over me as I remembered
with Geoff after we first met. "Jesus, I take a cruise trying to
get that mess behind me, and here I am thinking about Geoff and
mooning over a young man who
other things to do more important than worrying about me and my fucking
bed." I exclaimed
out loud to no one
in particular, trying to shake the melancholic state I felt myself
Wearing only briefs, I stepped out on the balcony into the
darkness feeling the warm breeze created by the ship's plowing south
the dark Atlantic. The ship's lights reflected on the surface of the
dark water, and there was the sound of water hissing as the ship's
phosphorescent bow wave rolled away into the darkness. Leaning
against the railing, I sipped my drink gazing at the millions of stars
twinkling in the jet black sky and remembering the many days and nights
that I had spent at sea while I was in the navy.
"Those were the days," I thought. Now I'm free and single with no
to be concerned about. I no longer have to worry about whom he is
to fuck next
whom I might catch him in bed with, and I don't need to make excuses
linger in my
office rather than going home. I had made a fool of myself during
the four years we were together. I had not accepted that he was not
settle with one person and make a life. He had been great
in bed; but, little by little, those times when we made love became
less frequent with longer and longer intervals between them. His
excuses of being exhausted from a bad day at the hospital or having
to get up
early for work always rang hollow, and I let them slip by
rather than making an issue of the fact that we were growing further
apart with each passing day. The inevitable ensuing
arguments were painful, ending with him throwing phony tantrums and
stomping out, leaving
me alone to suffer in anguish at the fear of losing him even though I
knew he would be meeting someone.
Sometimes he would be gone two or three days before coming back; and
then we would cry together, make up, and make love after expressing a
for each other that was no longer there. It went on like that for
over a year until I came home early one day and found him in bed with a
whom I had thought was my best friend. That was the straw
that broke the camel's back; and, in a rage, I threw them and their
clothes out into the snow. Several of our friends had tried to
arrange a reconciliation to no avail; and I remained celibate,
foolishly swearing off sex and lovers.
Geoff had been my first and only lover, and my remaining in the
we had shared together didn't help. After a few months of my
down invitations, the invitations
stopped. It wasn't until my firm offered me a new position out of
Philadelphia that I started to regain a sense of normalcy to my
life. I still buried myself in my work, but being in new
surroundings helped to relieve the deep-seated pain of having foolishly
completely of myself and then being rejected.
One or two of the people I worked with invited me out for dinner, and
at first I hesitated before finally taking the big step of accepting an
invitation for drinks and dinner. Charlene, one of the
para-legals in the office, had invited me to her home several
times before I finally relented and accepted. She was
a few years older than I and married with twelve and fourteen year
old daughters. Her husband was an attractive,
intelligent man who worked in stocks and bonds. The dinner was
excellent, and I was enjoying
myself for the first time in months until I realized that I was
subconsciously attracted to her husband and was comparing him to
Geoff. The deeply suppressed feelings of needing to be with
over me, and I wasn't sure whether
he had caught my covert glances; but every now and then he would
smile, looking at me as he took a drag from his cigarette with one
ankle over his knee and his hand resting over the noticeable bulge in
his crotch. I was
probably wrong, but a cold fear washed over me at the thought that
Charlene may have suspected why I kept to myself and had innocently
to her husband during a conversation. I quickly averted
my eyes, attempting to suppress the
tingling feeling in my groin and hoping the evening would end.
experience returned me to the shell that I had built around
myself. Charlene made one or two attempts at getting together
again for dinner, but I managed to make satisfactory explanations to
myself. I had gotten pretty adept at making excuses, and they
becoming easier to make as I deferred invitations. The big
problem was not satisfying the yearning
and desires to be with another man, and masturbation was becoming less
and less satisfying.
After bungling, and almost losing, two easily winnable real
cases, I realized that I had to get away and shake the ghosts of the
The unsolicited travel brochure that was in my mail one afternoon
excellent opportunity to do what needed to be done; and, after
three calls, I contracted for a seven day Caribbean cruise to the
Virgin Islands with stops in St.Thomas, St. Croix and St. John.
I had never been on a civilian cruise, and I was not sure what it
would be like. Several
of my co-workers had said that I would meet lots of people and that,
all of the different activities that were offered, it would be more fun
than a barrel of monkeys. They also said that the only thing I
had to be careful of
was losing all of my money in the casino.
"Well, I've managed to meet a young man who has shaken the cobwebs
and rekindled the fire in my loins, and I avoided the casino, so
why am I in my stateroom alone?" I
said aloud, draining the last of the now lukewarm drink.
"You aren't alone, Mr. Ward," a quiet voice said from behind me.
Glancing quickly to my right, I recognized the reflection of Petrik in
the opaque panel of the stateroom door with linens in his arms.
"Christ, Petrik," I exclaimed loudly, almost dropping my glass as I
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you; but I didn't know you had
returned from dinner, and I used my pass key," he said smiling broadly,
his green eyes twinkling.
"I should be the one apologizing for shouting at you, not you to me,"
replied breathing in
deeply and trying to regain my composure. "You did say you were
going to change the beds; but, when I saw they hadn't been, I thought
you had probably gotten busy and had forgotten about it. I was
having a drink before retiring; and, since it was so warm, I was
outside and apparently thinking out loud."
"We all do that at times," he said, dropping the linens on one of the
beds, and stepping out on the balcony. "I often go up to the
jogging track at night after I'm off duty if I feel a little
lonely or want to get away and be by myself. No one is
their exercise that late; and it's
peaceful, just right for relaxing and thinking."
"Do you do that often, Petrik?" I said
softly, painfully aware of the sudden swelling in the pouch of my
"Usually I go when it has been a bad day and I am feeling depressed
listening to too many demanding passengers or when I want to get away
the noise in the crew's quarters," he
said chuckling, and smiling softly as he rested one arm on the railing
sideways facing me as he continued. "Mostly, I think about home, my
mother and friends. Sometimes I talk aloud as if I were talking with
one of them, but I don't expect someone to be behind me listening the
way I was behind you. "
His eyes had changed to an almost translucent turquoise, and his face
shone a soft bronze from the reflected light of the wall sconces.
I felt the urge to reach out and take him in my arms; but, breathing in
deeply, I reluctantly suppressed the feelings building inside of me as
"What about your father, don't you think about him?"
"No, not like I used to; I lost him in the war with the Serbs. He died
in Bosnia two years ago. I lost him and a friend whom I
was very close to," he said, turning and looking out over the water.
"I'm sorry, Petrik. I didn't mean to bring up sad memories," I
said, feeling ashamed at prying.
"That's okay; it does not bother me like it did," he said inhaling
deeply, and asking as he exhaled. "Do you mind if I ask what you meant
when you said you had met a young man who had shaken the cobwebs
"Oh, Jesus, you heard me say that?" I asked feeling the blood rushing
to my head. "Christ, I shouldn't have been thinking out loud."
"Why not?" he asked, moving a little closer. "You were relaxing and not
thinking about anyone being behind you. I think we all do that at
times without realizing that we do. I should have
something when I came in and saw you on the balcony. I
really shouldn't have surprised you when I said what I did, except it
just sort of came out; and, from the way you spoke, you sounded so
lonely and upset that I couldn't help saying it."
"You caught me at a bad moment," I said, gazing almost impudently,
searchingly into his eyes. "I was thinking back over a
particularly bad time in my life, and I was expecting too much for this
evening even though I didn't really have a good reason to."
"Expecting too much?" he asked, returning my gaze.
I could see, no, feel the beat of his heart from the way his chest was
rapidly expanding as he breathed. For a brief moment, I glanced
down; and, seeing the swelling in his crotch, I brazenly plunged ahead
and whispered, "I was expecting, no, to be truthful that's not
right. I was hoping you would be here changing the beds."
"That's why I delayed until I was off duty. I was hoping you
here, and I could stay awhile with you if you felt the same way I do
about you," he
breathed softly as he melted into my arms, his full succulent lips
revealing the tip of his tongue moving over his even white teeth.
A feeling unlike any that I had felt in a long time swept over me as
our tongues merged twisting and searching. I could feel the power
in his muscled arms as he drew me tightly to him; the pounding of his
heart through his tunic and the touch of his steel hard cock pressing
against mine sent waves of desire rushing through me.
All thoughts of Geoff disappeared in the instant we kissed, and
my body trembled with the excitement of being in Petrik's arms.
His lips were soft, and his tongue was probing, and I felt a
tenderness radiating from deep within his hard muscled body. I
almost swooned from the rapture of being with him when he suddenly slid
between us and grasped my aching cock.
"Jesus, Petrik," I gasped groaning as I pulled my lips from his. "Do
that, and my cock is going to explode."
"Mine too," he said, leaning his head back and arching his back, his
hard cock pressing against
mine. Breathing deeply, he looked
into my eyes letting me see the jade green of his eyes flashing with
feeling and excitement. "Maybe I should fix the bed first?"
"That might be a good idea," I replied holding on to him as if I were
he was only an apparition, created out of frustration, and would
disappear. We stood silently for a moment gazing into each other's
the heat of lust and desire blazing fiercely; and I whispered softly,
teasingly, "As horny as I am, any bed would be all right."
"Horny?" he asked questioningly as he released his arms from around my
chest and started to unbutton his tunic.
"Here, let me do that," I said, breathing in deeply and feeling the
heat of my
emotions subsiding a little as I brushed his fingers aside and started
to unbutton his tunic with trembling fingers. "You've never
heard anyone say 'horny'? It means feeling hot for someone and wanting
them or being really
ready to make love, and wanting to feel the soft touch of his hot
body and his hard cock pressing against yours."
"No," he replied breathing heavily, his eyes sparkling as he shucked
his tunic and tossed it on one of the balcony chairs. " I haven't
heard that; but, if that is what it means, that is the
way I feel."
"Christ, Petrik, you're awesome," I said almost gasping as I looked
at the magnificent definition of his pectoral muscles, the breadth of
chest, the thickness of his biceps, his lightly hair-covered
forearms and his almost obscenely narrow waist with the tantalizingly
golden trail of silky
hair extending down from his bellybutton in the valley between thick
ripped abdominal muscles and disappearing into the
waistband of his trousers.
"No more than you," he said running his eyes up and down my almost
naked body before gathering me in his arms again holding me tightly as
he spoke. "I was hoping we could explore each other together,
but you cheated me out of that pleasure by undressing before I was
"I wasn't expecting you, Petrik, remember?" I said gently.
"That was my fault, not yours," he said grinning, and breathing in
deeply before asking, "Would you mind calling me 'Peter' when we are
alone instead of 'Petrik'? All of my close friends call me by
name, and I like it. It sounds more intimate and less cold than
'Petrik this', or 'Petrik that'. 'Petrik' means 'Peter' in
guess you knew that."
"I assumed that by the phonetic association of the two names,
but I'll call you 'Peter' if you will call me 'Caine' instead of 'Mr.
Ward'," I said, gazing at the warmth in his eyes while I ran my fingers
up and down the nape of his neck.
"Caine," he mused for a moment as if savoring the name. "I like that,
and I like the softness of the hair on your chest. Is it all as
soft?" he asked as he twirled his fingers in the thicker portion that
covered the sternum between the breast muscles.
"That is for you to find out," I said grinning and brushing his
lips with mine.
"I hope it is; some of my comrades at home have such dark wiry hair
all over their bodies that it almost looks like thick wire," he said as
we released each other, and went inside.
After locking the outside door in the
open position, I slid the screen door shut. Peter moved the
brought, to the couch and quickly stripped the old linens from the twin
beds. It was fascinating watching his muscles rippling like steel
cables under the smooth bronzed flesh of his broad back and watching
bulging as he moved the beds closer together and latched them
"It looks like you have done that often," I said as he straightened up,
and breathed in deeply, the thick smooth muscles of his chest
his chest expanded.
"I have," he said, grinning as he moved to the couch and retrieved what
looked like a quilted bed mat. Shaking it out, I saw it was a
fitted mat unlike the ones that lay loosely under the sheets.
"Would you like to help me with this?" he asked as he billowed the mat
over the joined beds. "This is the difficult part."
"Not at all," I answered stepping forward from the doorway and
catching the edge of the mat before it settled down on the bed.
Following his lead, I snapped the corners in place; and the narrow
separation, created by joining the beds, disappeared.
"Now the sheets, pillows, and a light cotton blanket, and we are
finished," he said as he shook the sheets out and spread them over the
It took only a few seconds for the bed to be changed from two small
into a comfortable queen.
"You did that very well," he said, grinning as he tucked a pillow under
his chin and slipped the pillow-case on.
"I've made a few beds," I replied, catching the pillow, and dropping it
at the headboard as he slipped the other pillow into its case.
"I can see that," he said, grinning, his eyes twinkling. "Maybe
you should apply for a job as a crewmen."
"And work on the same ship as you?" I asked, moving around the bed and
slipping my arms around him.
"That might be fun, and we could both sit on the jogging track at
night," he answered, placing his lips on mine in a long lingering
His lips were sweet and delicious, but a sudden urgency in my
bladder interrupted the pleasure of being in his arms with his lips on
mine, and I leaned my head back. "Sorry, Peter, nature calls," I
whispered huskily, pulling out of the circle of his arms.
Dropping my briefs around my ankles, I leaned over the toilet just in
time. A golden stream cascaded into the dark blue chemical water;
and, for a moment, I felt an adolescent pang of embarrassment thinking
he could hear
it. It seemed like ages before the thick stream slowly dwindled
to a trickle as the pressure on my bladder faded. As I milked the
last few drops, my
cock swelled slightly; and I kicked the briefs from around my
ankles. Breathing in deeply, I swished Listerine in my mouth
while I searched in my toilet bag for a long unused tube of KY
lubricant. Spitting the mouth wash into the sink, I
dampened one of the many face towels; and, grabbing a large fluffy bath
towel, I palmed
the lubricant and flicked the light switch throwing the bathroom into
The golden light of the wall sconces was more than enough to see by,
wasn't prepared for what I saw when I moved from the bathroom into what
had become the bedroom. I had already seen the mesmerizing
beauty of Peter's upper body, but the vision of absolute loveliness
waiting for me struck me speechless.
He was lying in bed propped up by the pillows with one arm behind his
head, and the sheet pulled up to his waist. His other hand rested on
his stomach; and his legs were spread slightly, revealing the thick
outline of his cock . His thick hair
absorbed the soft
light, gleaming a reddish almost strawberry blond. The color of
his eyes was a deep jade green, and the stark white sheets intensified
the golden bronze of his magnificently muscled chest and ripped
abdominal muscles. A feeling of intense desire swept over me;
several moments, I stood immobilized as I gazed
at how radiantly gorgeous he was.
"My, God," I thought gazing at Petrik lying serenely against the
pillows, the beat of my heart quickening as I gulped air into my
lungs, "Apollo in all of his glory was never as stunningly
Several seconds past while I stood naked, immobile, my stiff cock
hidden by the thick folds of the towels draped over my forearm.
"Do you think we might need those?" he asked glancing at the towels,
his eyes shining as he flashed a brilliant smile.
"I...I didn't know," I stammered, my eyes glued to
the elongated bulge hidden beneath the sheet.
"We won't know if you continue standing there like a Grecian
statue," he said softly, teasingly running the tip of his tongue over
soft succulent lips as he threw the sheet back.
His thick hooded cock was supported by full testicles resting between
legs, its thick base surrounded by a forest of glistening,
golden hair. His heavy testicles hid the soft under flesh of the
perineum that separated them from his anus. Broad
heavily muscled thighs and calves were covered by a golden down of
silky fine hair.
"Jesus, Peter," I croaked as I slid into bed, dropping the towels and
lubricant to the floor. "I've never seen anyone as gorgeous as you."
"You've said that already," he whispered, turning to face me and
gathering my trembling body into his arms, my cock pressing against the
hard muscle of his thigh. "Don't you think that you are as
attractive and that
I have the same feelings as you?" he said, gently moving his finger in
circles through the soft silky hair around the hardening nipples of my
"Oh, God, I hope so; it's been so long since anyone has touched me," I
whimpered, trembling from the gossamer touch of his fingers moving
lightly through the silky dark hair covering my chest.
Peter's hands floated over the muscles of my back and down my arms
like the wings of a butterfly; and, with each touch of his fingers,
every nerve in my love-starved body tingled with excitement. The
touch of his lips brushing over mine, the tip of his tongue invading
the recesses of my ear, and his hands gently kneading and searching for
tender areas sent deliciously warm sensuous waves washed over me,
filling me with a desire and passion that I had forgotten I could feel.
Moaning softly, I started to put my arms around him when he said,
softly, as he pushed gently against my chest, "Easy, Caine, easy.
Lie back and let me enjoy the pleasures that were hidden when I first
saw you this morning. I've waited all day for this time to be
"I've waited longer than that, Peter," I said, succumbing to the gentle
pressure of his hand, my voice quivering with emotion.
"Then we both will enjoy this first time," he replied,
lowering his lips, kissing and sucking on each hard nipple, the tip of
his tongue creating waves of delicious bolts of energy surging into the
depths of my testicles.
"Oh, God, Peter," I groaned running my fingers through his thick golden
holding his head as his teeth nipped at each granite-hard nipple.
Raising his head from my chest, he looked into my eyes briefly; and I
saw the fires of desire burning in the dark green depths of his
impishly, he lowered
his head again, lightly kissing my breasts; and the touch of his lips
delicious pangs of erotic pain radiating throughout my body. His
hands gently caressed the most sensitive areas of my ribs and loins as
he covered me in kisses slowly moving downward to where my drooling
cock throbbed in anticipation. The fires of desire burned
fiercely in my groin; and, when he wafted his hot breath over my cock,
thrust my hips upwards groaning, "Take it, Peter; take it, please."
"Not just yet," he said softly, gently pressing my pelvis down as he
sat up and looked down at me, his
voice resonating with emotion.
"I don't know if I can wait much longer," I whimpered reaching up and
running my hands over his heaving chest.
"Just a moment longer," he said quietly, breathing in deeply, his eyes
caressing me as he
moved one hand up and down over my chest and stomach, tangling his
fingers in the thick silky hair surrounding the base of my throbbing
cock. Lowering his lips to mine, he gently kissed them and
whispered, "Just a moment longer and we will enjoy each other together,
tasting the nectar
that yearns to be released."
Twisting around, he stretched his magnificent body out beside
mine. Creamy white pearls of pre-seminal fluid oozed from the
urethral opening of the hooded, blood-engorged crown of his smooth
unveined cock. Moving
closer, I inhaled the musky masculine odor emanating from his groin as
the precursor to the aphrodisiac that I had been craving for so
long. His hips moved gently pushing his cock against my lips, and
I responded to the feeling of his tongue licking and cleaning the crown
my cock. Pushing gently, we both opened our lips; and I felt his
cock sliding deep into my throat as mine slipped into the hot depths of
As if we were one, we both moved one leg closer and rested our heads on
soft inner side of each other's thighs. Waves of rapture flowed
over me from the feeling of my cock buried deep in Peter's throat, and
a deep moan of ecstatic pleasure welled up from within my chest.
I felt Peter
shudder gently, and I knew he enjoyed the sonorous vibrations of my
washing over his cock. He started a slow piston movement driving
his cock deep with each gentle thrust, and my hips responded matching
his movements, and my aching cock seemed to sink deeper into his
with each quickening thrust.
It was as if we were going through an erotic transmutation as we sank
deeper into the euphoric haze of matchless masculine love. There
feeling that we
had evolved from two sweating bodies into one, and that feeling seemed
to surround us as
the pace of our love making increased. We raced to reach the
maximum pinnacle of pleasure, that moment when all of our inner desires
would erupt in one glorious flow of the life fluids churning, rushing
to be drained from the hot overflowing crucibles deep within our loins.
That moment came in a crescendo of groans as the muscles of our bodies
tightened, cocks swelling and hardening from a force we no longer
controlled. It was an ecstatically satisfying millisecond when
our cocks strained before erupting with a volcanic force that sent
thick rivers of
sperm rushing downward through gripping throat muscles
into waiting receptacles that ached to be filled.
I felt the steel muscles of his arms and mine holding each other
tightly as our cocks throbbed with each heart beat, jerking and gushing
as we greedily sucked the elixir of life from slowly wilting
cocks. With tight lips stripping the dribbling remnants of
sperm from slowly softening cocks, we fell back momentarily separating
as each other's cock slipped from the warm wet recesses of our mouths,
both of us moaning and gasping trying to fill the lungs within our
No words were necessary as we lay quietly; both of us, for the moment,
sated enjoying the feelings of rapture that slowly drained away to
be replaced by a lingering soft after-glow of pleasure.
I don't know how long we lay in an
inverted position; but, when Peter swung around pulling the sheet over
us, I reached for him. Sliding my arms around his chest, I hugged him
closely, and our lips met in a gentle emotional kiss that expressed our
feelings far better than any words could have. The loneliness
I had felt was gone, and I felt alive again invigorated by the
strength of his arms around me and the tenderness of his kiss.
"Peter," I said as our lips parted and we laid our heads on the
pillows. "You will never know how much making love to you meant to me."
"It makes me happy knowing you enjoyed it, Caine; but, it meant as much
to me," he said, turning his head and looking into my eyes. "You
said it had been such a long time for you, and it has been a long time
for me as well."
"It has?" I said, turning to face him and resting on my elbow. "I would
think you would have men clamoring to be
with you. I know that I was, but the thought of sex with you
frightened me at first."
"Why would you be frightened, Caine? I was trying to show you how I
felt and what I wanted ever since you came on board."
"No, I said that wrong. What I meant was that I wanted
you, but I was frightened that you would be offended if I made an
gesture or comment and that you would reject me. I don't believe
I could have stood it if you had, Peter."
"Who would..." he started to say stopping when I placed a finger
over his lips.
"I think I know what you were going to say, but let me explain,"
breathing in deeply. "It's like I told you earlier, it has been
months since the last time I was in bed with another man. The
last person I was with was my lover, and we had
a very nasty break up. He was nothing like you, but I loved him,
and we lived together for several years. He had a lot of affairs
with other men during that time; but, when I caught him and someone I
thought was my best friend in bed together, we broke up. I
haven't been able to bring myself to trust anyone since; and, after
that, I drew within myself, and stopped going out. I
was hurt once, and I didn't want that to happen again."
He lay quietly, looking up at me as he slowly moved his hand over my
thigh. His eyes glowed with compassion, and when I touched his
cheek, he grasped my hand and kissed each finger. He said,
" I don't
understand why anyone would want to hurt someone they loved, especially
someone as gentle and loving as you are. I can feel the caring
sensitivity and compassion in the way we made love. Such a
betrayal of love may happen in my country, but I know of no one who
treated anyone they loved so badly."
"You have never had a lover, have you, Peter," I asked softly.
"No, I don't believe so, at least not such as you describe," he
answered after thinking for a
moment. "I had a friend with whom I was very close. His
name was Josif, and we grew up together. We went to
school together and played together; we did all of those things that
boys do in secret. We learned the mysterious changes in our
bodies, and we learned the pleasures of those changes together.
It was a long time before we realized that we had
feelings for each other, other than the feelings that friends have for
each other. Josif
was much like you in his features, soft full lips with dark hair and
eyes. His body was firm and beautifully built. He was
exciting and fun to be with. The first time we made love was
as if a new world opened up, and we knew
we loved each other. I miss him greatly," he said softly, his
voice trailing off and his eyes gazing through the screen door into the
"Don't you see him anymore, Peter?"
"No, I lost Josif in the war," he whispered, turning to look at
me. "The Serbs took him captive in Bosnia, and we never knew what
happened to him, and many others. I think of him often; but, much like
you, I hadn't found someone with whom I
wanted to share myself until I saw you. Tonight, you were my
Josif, Caine; and I knew he would have approved."
There was a look of pain deep within the soft green of his eyes, and I
leaned down and kissed his forehead, whispering, "I am so sorry,
Peter. You make me feel so ashamed for telling you of my
"Don't feel that way, Caine. Josif and I had wonderful times
together. Those memories will always be with me, and tonight we
have been good
for each other," he said as he pulled me close, resting my head on his
chest. Stroking my hair, he said, "I haven't spoken with anyone
about it until you told me about the pain you have suffered. It
is good to talk about it, and you have made me feel better for
listening and making love to me. Not as he would have but by the
way you did and by the way we gave ourselves to each other."
"You listened to me, and it has made me feel better," I said as I
slipped my arm around his waist. "I only wish we had more than
just a few days to learn more about each other."
"We can learn much in seven days, Caine and, we will fill the evenings
and mornings with love," he whispered
drowsily, softly kissing my hair. "I want to know more about
"And I want to know more about you,
Peter." I whispered listening to the steady strong beat of his heart
and his slow even breathing as he fell asleep with his arms around me.
A feeling of bliss surrounded me as I lay in his powerful arms, his
warm body pressed to mine.
Memories of when Geoff and I had lain holding each other that first
time floated in the recesses of my mind, and my heart was filled with
a feeling that was much the same then as I was feeling for Peter. I
didn't want to lose that feeling again; but a little voice inside of
me whispered, "hope does not always spring eternal, and he lives a half
a world away in Macedonia."
The hiss of the water and the soft warm breeze floating though the open
door filled the room as I drifted off.