IKEA					 by Quantum
									
Every word in the story is true.  It happened to me on September 29, 1996
while travelling in Edmonton, Alberta.  I have written this story in it's 
original form, as a letter written to one of my fag, net buddies.  His 
submessages to me, are enclosed in [ ] brackets, while my submessages to 
him, are enclosed in { } brackets.  I had previously written Tod and had 
given him a brief teaser of my experience at:

                                IKEA

[Tod wrote:     OOOH, IKEA!!!   That is definitely a sex story... you've 
got to 		     tell me everything.. please!!!!]

{Tim wrote:      Hey Tod
        	 Now, you asked about IKEA.      MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM         
                 MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.
                 I'm thinking.
                 Oh, what the hell, okay.  I just love it when you beg.}

        I was kind of down as I hadn't gotten lucky the night before and 
I was as horny as a three-peckered-goat.  This had been caused by the 
fact that, the previous night, I had connected with this one cute guy at 
The Roost. The guy had a medium frame and was about 5'8", 165 or so, 
tight body, really nice butt, nice pouch, but very drunk.  We had started 
talking and to hear each other, we had to yell into each other's ear to 
be heard over the music.  I of course naturally, let my hand rest on the 
back of his neck and let my fingers play there for a bit, then to his 
earlobes, then down his back to his butt.  He seemed to be enjoying 
himself and returned the attention to a slightly lesser degree.  We 
talked some more, then he said he had to get another drink and he went 
off to the bar.  That was the last I saw of him.  Fucking cocktease!

       Anywho, late Sunday afternoon, I pulled into the Ikea Furniture 
Store parking lot and happened to notice this guy, not too far away, 
getting out of a small 4x4. He was 5' 8", had a slim build, maybe 160 
lbs, dark hair with a moustache and of course, the prerequisite cute 
butt. He went in ahead of me, while I got my dog some more food and water 
and then let him stretch his legs.  I went in and started looking around 
and I noticed this guy again.  Every now and then I found him looking at 
me, but I didn't acknowledge it.  When he wasn't looking at me, I was 
checking him out.  Obviously, by his mannerisms he was gay.  I had 
thought of getting closer and 'accidentally' brushing his ass with my 
hand, but I couldn't seem to maneuver him into an area that was tight 
enough for me to pull it off.  Then I thought, Oh what the hell, he 
probably has a lover at home.  I sort of lost track of him and just
walked around for a while.
        I left IKEA, got into my camper and drove north on the Calgary 
Trail to the City Center.  When I got up to speed, I couldn't help but 
notice some movement on the right wiper-blade.  I looked and saw this 
note and immediately cut across four lanes of traffic to pull into a 
parking lot.  I slammed the shifter into park, opened the door and 
practically dived for the paper.  I read it and couldn't believe my luck. 
 The note said, "If you're into some hot action with another guy, give me 
a call.  Mike," and then his phone number.  I looked around for a pay 
phone but couldn't see one.  Cursing myself for not getting a cell-phone, 
I jumped into my truck in hot pursuit of a phone booth.  I'd find myself 
driving on one side of the road, only to see a phone on the opposite 
side, with no possibility of crossing over the traffic.  I was starting 
to get hard, which didn't help.  I'm quite large boned with a 45 1/2" 
chest and a 34" waist.  As my pants fit  really tight and I was sitting, 
I didn't have much room left for 'the big guy'.  Finally a pay phone!

       {By the by Tod, are you still interested?}

       I pulled over, jumped out, fumbled for change, then dialed.  I 
prayed for an answer.  Then a pickup and I heard "Hello," (there is a 
God).  I explained to him that I'd gotten his note and that I was 
returning his call.  "Well" he said, and then went on to ask me what I 
thought.  I told him that I was very flattered and that for the last ten 
weeks, I had been touring Canada and bedding as many guys as I could.  We 
made a little small talk, then went on to our preferences.  I told him 
that generally, I was a top, but that it was important for me to see my 
lovers very satisfied.  I told him that I liked just about anything, 
short of the sick and painful stuff.  He told me that he had always been 
a bottom and that his preferences duplicated my own.  He gave me his 
address and I told him that I'd get there as quick as possible.  I wasn't 
kidding!  After I changed into my black 'Snowy River' cowboy hat and
full-length black Australian Outback duster, I booted all 22 1/2 feet and
11,500 pounds of my camper back down the Calgary Trail at 60 to 70 MPH.
I was lucky that I didn't get snagged with a ticket!  I got to his 
apartment and talked to him again at the intercom and he buzzed me up.   
                       As he opened the door his eyes bugged out, then a 
huge smile crossed his face.  (He had told me on the phone that he has 
quite a hard-on for cowboys.)  I got in, ditched the boots, coat and hat 
and we went into the living room.  He sat down on the couch and I of 
course, ignored the other chairs and sat down beside him.  After talking 
for over an hour, I let my fingers start to play on his neck.  (They seem 
to have a mind of their own!)  His breathing became uneven and then we 
started caressing each other like a bucket of snakes.  I asked him if 
he'd like to make love with me.  All he could say was, "Yes."  I put one 
arm around his back and one arm under his butt and lifted him off of the 
couch.  Again his eyes bugged out and he stammered, "Oh my God.  No one 
has ever picked me up like that before."  I answered, "Well I've just 
done it."  I carried him to the bedroom and we slowly undressed each 
other, kissing and caressing all the while.  To get matters going, I went 
down on him and sucked him into a lather, to which he later reciprocated. 
 We kissed and caressed each other and then I asked him if he would like 
me to fuck him.  Again, his answer was, "Yes."  I slipped on a rubber and 
fucked him to the point that he'd almost blow his load, then let him cool 
down a bit.  After about two hours and many, many positions, he had blown 
his load twice, but I as yet hadn't.  By that time though, I was really 
tired, so we just held and caressed each other for at least an hour.  
Later, I grabbed a shower and we got a bite to eat.  We went to sleep in 
each other's arms. We fucked and sucked, and sucked and fucked repeatedly 
over the next couple of days blowing our loads  repeatedly.  On 
Wednesday, I decided that I should get home and he had to get up early to 
go to his other part-time job.

       After I got home, I was sitting at me computer when a thought 
occurred to me.  I went into one of my programs and created a number of 
very nice 'pick up cards', printed in colour, on a sheet of business card 
stock.  Needless to say, the cards read, "If you're interested in some 
hot action with another guy, phone Mike at (etcetera)."  I mailed them to 
him on the following Friday.  I phone him a week later.  He told me he 
hadn't stopped laughing since he received the cards.

      {Hey Tod, do you ever get to IKEA?}

P.S.
        I can just see it now, every fag that's read this story, will be
frequenting every furniture store, from coast to coast, looking for
action.  Ahhh, isn't life grand!