All other content or otherwise are works of my own imagination. All events are fictitious in nature.
Any similarities to persons living, dead, or otherwise are purely coincidental.
This story contains strong themes of homosexual content, if this offends you in any way, please refrain from reading further. If you are not of legal age to read this, please leave now.
A/N: I'd like to thank TalonRider for editing this chapter. His unparalleled brilliance and tireless effort applied to my work is greatly appreciated. Thank you.
Chapter 20: The Weekend: Part II
I leaned closer and placed my lips against his warm, moist shoulder. I pulled back and watched as the hot spray cascaded over his smooth, tanned skin.
Jamie and I were in the shower; washing away the evidence from our...well, from our activity. Sigh. I swear, it should be illegal to do those things with Jamie. He was just so perfect, you know? As though someone had searched the entire world for everything nice and then turned it into a boy. That boy was Jamie, and he was all mine.
As I stood there behind him in the cubicle, I began to wonder how it was possible to be so much in love with someone. Sure you had people say that all the time, mostly men and women, but what I felt towards Jamie was love. It had to be love. The excitement of having them close, the feeling of loss when they were away, doing foolish things without thinking; I had all the symptoms. I was in love.
Jamie turned around and faced me, his eyes searching mine, and a grin present on his face. I loved seeing him smile, seeing him happy. But it truly made me weak to the knees when I knew I was the reason for his happiness.
He leaned closer, rubbing his nose against mine, "I love you." He whispered, melting my heart.
"I love you too, babes." I whispered back as I pecked him on his soft cheek.
We started to wash each other in the shower. Admittedly, we had a few problems arise, but two orgasms later, we were doing just fine.
After the shower, and subsequent getting dressed, Jamie and I headed downstairs and made ourselves some lunch. It was so relaxing and loving to be with him like that. From rolling about in his bed, to the shower, to sitting at his dining table; we didn’t have to hide. Our love was present for all to see. Well, the house was vacant, and the blinds were closed, but inside we made it our little paradise, our utopia.
I stared at him from across the table, my eyes roaming his, "You know, I'm sure you're straight."
Jamie raised an eyebrow at me, "And you say that after everything I just did to you?"
"Don't you mean what we did together?"
He shook his head, "No, what I did to you." He repeated, looking at me, "Besides, how exactly am I straight?"
I shrugged, "I dunno..." I replied, pausing, "You just seem like a ladies' man."
He giggled, "Ladies' man?"
I nodded, "Yeah. I'd never of guessed that you were available."
"I could have said the same about you." He pointed out.
"Yeah, but it was just the way you have the girls around you and stuff."
He laughed at that, "I can't help being irresistible to both sexes..." He smirked, "Are you jealous, Matt?"
I eyed his blond locks, still damp from the shower, "What?!? Of course not!"
"You sure?" He quizzed, "You weren't too happy about Li fancying me."
I frowned at the mention of her name, but came up with a smart reply, "You think I'm jealous if her? No, she should be jealous of me." I paused, "Especially after everything I just did to you." I said, blushing slightly at my own words.
Jamie raised his eyebrows, "Oh? And what did you just do to me?" He asked, giving me that stare if his.
I thought of something to say, but found myself blushing madly.
Jamie sat there, laughing at me.
I stared at him for a second before I stood up, walked over to him, and pulled his lips to mine. After a few moments, I pulled back and grinned at him.
“Mmm, I remember now.” He whispered, licking his lips seductively.
I walked back over to my chair and sat down, taking a sip of my drink again, “So, Mr Keller, what are we going to do today?”
“We could go into town if you want.”
“Sounds good.” I said, looking at him, “Just us or shall we call the guys?”
He thought for a moment before he smiled, “Just us.” He said, “I want you all to myself today.” He winked.
I blushed lightly, “I think I can manage that.”
We sat there for a about another half-hour, just talking casually, or stealing longing glances at each other. I think part of me was still in Jamie’s bed, while the other half was in the shower. Sitting at the table was just a shell, a shell on cloud nine.
We eventually decided to head into town. It was quite nice, just Jamie and I; something of a rarity, given how there was usually someone accompanying us. But now that both our closest friends and family knew about us, I guess they could understand and respect our need for a little ‘us’ time.
As we walked around town, I couldn’t help but look at all the people. Specifically I was looking at all the couples, most of whom were holding hands. I thought about that a lot back then, the idea of holding hands with another boy. To all the straight couples it was second nature, they’d reach out, grab their hand, and off they went. But for me, to extend my hand out, would be telling the world who I was. What I was. And I wasn’t quite ready for that. Worse still, it would have made the following couple of minutes much harder than they were.
Jamie and I had just walked out of Game, a store that, surprisingly, specialises in video games. We didn’t buy anything, mostly because we were out of pocket, but there wasn’t really anything worth buying anyway. Speaking of which, I began to wonder if my parents were still going to keep up with my monthly allowance that they put in my bank account. It was an automatic thing that their bank done, but I guessed they could have cancelled it. No. That would have been too far, right? I mean they wouldn’t have cut me off that much, surely? I crunched over my thoughts for another second, before someone called out my name.
I knew the voice instantly. Praying that I was wrong, I turned around, my eyes focusing on the three people walking towards me. No, I was right.
“I thought that was you.” She said, “We haven’t seen you in quite a while.”
I managed a weak smile at my auntie, Claire, as she hugged me. “Oh, hi guys.” I said, as pulled back and looked at the other two. My uncle, Steven, and my twenty-one-year-old cousin, Craig. They lived about an hour or so away from my house, so unless they were visiting us, there’d be no other reason for them to have travelled that far. I panicked, hoping that they had other plans instead. Better still, I was hoping they hadn’t just left my house, where my parents could have told them everything!
They smiled back, “How have you been keeping?” Asked Steven, as he shook my hand.
I thought about that. They wouldn’t have asked that if they ‘knew’ about me already. I nodded, “Yeah, I’m fine thanks.”
Their eyes shifted to Jamie.
I glanced at my blond beauty, “This is Jamie, a friend from school.” I said, “Jamie, this is my auntie, Claire, my uncle, Steven, and my cousin, Craig.”
He flashed them a smile, “Hi.”
Claire nodded, “It’s nice to meet you, Jamie.” She said, turning to me, “I’m sure your mum mentioned him to me.”
I tried not to let the panic show on my face, “Erm, well he only came to England this year so…”
She nodded, “Yes, that’s what it was.” She said.
I relaxed some before I glanced at Craig. His eyes were narrowed at Jamie, as though he was analysing him. As though he was trying to figure out who, or what he was. That frightened me some, not because he could tell who Jamie was to me from a stare, but the fact that Craig was quite a homophobe. Couple that with the fact that he had quite a hot head, I wished that I wouldn’t be around to see his immediate reaction when he finally found out about me. Physically he was both slightly taller and larger than myself, standing at 5’11”. He had light brown hair, which was currently spiked up, and was about average in the looks department. Of course, that never stopped him from always having a girlfriend of some sort.
Craig must have noticed the evils that I was giving him, because he turned and looked at me, “What?” He asked with a slight grin. While Craig was a homophobe, and was apparently not the best behaved pupil in school, he was always quite pleasant to his family, myself included. In fact, before I knew what ‘dirty queers’ meant, Craig was my favourite cousin. Funny how things change…
“You had something flying around your head.” I replied, “Looked like a bee.”
Claire stepped back and looked at him, “Oh, be careful Craig. Remember the one I saw earlier, it was huge!”
Craig glanced about to his mother’s desire, but his eyes returned to mine soon after. I couldn’t tell for certain, but I think he knew something was up.
“Anyway, we’ll let you go now, as we’ll see you later anyway.” Replied Steven.
I looked at him, “Sorry?”
“We’re going to pop in and say ‘hi’ to your parents, and Josh.” He replied, “We know they’ve been really busy with work for the past week.” He explained, “No one in the family has managed to speak to them much.” He said, with a slight chuckle.
“Hehehe, yeah.” I said nervously, my mind going one-hundred miles an hour. Really busy at work? No one’s spoken to them? That must have been the excuse Mum and Dad used, at least they haven’t told anyone yet. But oh how that was about to change. I began to wonder if they even knew about Claire and Steven coming to visit. Probably not. Wait a minute! Isn’t there a law against popping up uninvited to families’ houses? Can’t we send them away until we’re ready for them?
“That’s great then. We’ll see you later.” Said Steven as they began to drift away.
I nodded my head, “Yeah, bye guys.” I said, noting how Craig’s eyes were now focused on the both of us, before he turned and walked in the opposite direction.
Once they were out of sight, Jamie turned to me, “You alright?”
I turned to him, “Not really...” I began.
He looked at me, “We’ll figure it out. Perhaps we could come up with some kind of excuse of why you can’t be there.” He said, before he frowned slightly, “And what’s wrong with…Craig?”
“You mean apart from being a stupid homophobe with his head up-“ I began to rant, before I realised where I was.
Jamie’s lip curled at the edge, “I think that sums it up.”
I looked at him, “He’s a bastard. Did you see the way that he was looking at you?”
“Yeah, but it was no match for that killer stare of yours!” He giggled, “Remind me never to get on your bad side.”
I managed a smile, “You’ll never be on my bad side.” I promised, before I thought about what happened. More to the point, I began to wonder about what I should do. I found my self reaching into my pocket, retrieving my phone.
“Who you calling?”
I looked at the display, “Home.”
call home to my parents was strained to say the least. Even though
only two days had gone by since I last saw them, it still seemed like
weeks had passed. Connor’s party the night before, Jamie and I
in bed together that very morning; it was as though I was starting my
life again, but this time I was at the other end of the tunnel. Only
now it seemed that something was trying to push me back in, shove me
back into that cold, dark hole.
It was my dad who answered, probably for the best. Out of the two, he seemed to be the one who handled it the best. Hell, he even wanted me to stay. Of course that wouldn’t have happened anyway, they needed some time, and from the way he sounded on the phone, two days was nowhere near long enough. He was tired. I could hear it. And deep down, I too, was just as tired as he was. I craved to go back home, to stand in my room, to sleep in my sheets. I mean, how long did I realistically expect Connor’s parents to care for me? A week? Two at the most? No, I think I’m being unfair there. They told me I could stay there as long as I wanted, and knowing the Reed family, that’s exactly what they meant.
On the phone, Dad seemed as surprised as I was that Mum’s sister was in town. It took us a few minutes, but we ultimately decided that I would make a brief appearance, but then I’d leave and go to Connor’s house, stating that I had other plans. That was fine by me, the last thing I wanted to do was hang around with them lot for the whole day. My stomach was already doing back flips. I couldn’t wait…as if…
Matthew’s doing just fine at school.” Replied my mum as
she looked across at me in the lounge.
I slurped some of my coke, nodding at her. I’d been at home for around twenty-minutes. Fortunately for me, the other guys had already arrived, so I didn’t have to wait around for them. But even in those twenty-minutes, it felt like hell. Just sitting there, listening to my parents go on, acting as though everything was fine between us. To my surprise, they actually done really well at that. If it weren’t for the stares they’d send me every so often, I would have thought that everything was fine between us.
But it wasn’t just their stares that bugged me. Craig was also joining in the fun and was giving me his own looks. I couldn’t figure out why he was giving me that look. It was as though he ‘sussed’ out what was going on between Jamie and I. But he can’t have done, not from such a short meeting, surely.
“Huh?” I asked, my ears perking up at the sound of ‘girlfriend’. It was one of those words that would send my shields up, and get my tongue at the ready for quick reply.
Claire turned to me, “I was asking if you had a girlfriend.”
‘Alright, you know what to do men!’ Said that voice inside my head, as I formulated my reply, “Not at the moment.” I replied, noting that my parents were all but shooting lasers out of their pupils at me.
“What about Sophie?” Asked Craig, “She’s still around, right?”
A couple of years back, after I’d acknowledged the fact that I was gay, Craig and his family came over to our house. During their stay, Craig was certain that I had to fancy at least one girl in my year. I held him off for a while, but in fear of him thinking that I might not be the straight cousin he knew, and accepted, I told him that I fancied Sophie. It wasn’t a bad choice, I mean I could’ve messed it up and said Hayley, but even then he’d have no idea who she was, so it wouldn’t have mattered. Still, he had a name and he was content with that. Fast forward a few years, and up popped the question again, but this time, the stakes were raised.
I managed a small smile, “Yeah, she’s still about. But she’s dating someone.”
“Ah, must be that Jamie I bet.”
I thought for a few seconds before I answered, I wanted to throw him right off any trail he might have, “No, he’s with this girl, Li.” I felt a little guilty saying that, but after thinking about it further, I figured that, once I told Jamie, it might actually prompt a round of giggles from him. I emerged from my daze and listened to the conversation, relieved that my parents changed the subject topic: gardening. No one had anything to hide in gardening.
I sat back in my chair and sipped some more of my Coke. I began to wonder how they’d react if I were to out myself. Right then, at that very moment. I wondered what their expressions would be like. I wondered what my parents’ expressions would have been like. I glanced up at Craig, watching as he looked at my dad. I wondered if he’d get physical, if he’d actually try to hurt me. Max, for all his dislike towards homosexuality, never raised a fist to me. But Craig…I pushed the thought out of my head. Concentrated on something else. But in hindsight, I wasn’t stupid enough to really contemplate outing myself, but just thinking about it never hurt anyone.
I relaxed in the chair and managed through what I assumed to be an hour, but was quite surprised when they announced that they were about to leave. I fished my phone out of my pocket, checked the time, and realised that I’d been there for nearly three hours! Oh, how time flies when… forget it. They mentioned something about it being a shame not to see Josh, but my parents said that he was out with family friends. I was actually quite relieved when I considered that fact. Sure Josh was a smart kid, but I wasn’t sure how he’d handle a direct question about my sexuality. Not that Craig would pop out with, “Is your brother gay.” But I still wasn’t sure of how he’d answer something like that. At least he wasn’t there to test out his ability in that regard.
We walked them to the door and waved at them as they drove off. I bet that would have made a pretty picture. Mum, Dad, and myself standing in the doorway, like one ‘happy’ family. Only we were one ‘happy’ family with a secret. I thought about that and looked at my parents. It must have been the first time that they ever knew the secret behind my lie. Every time I used to answer with, “Not at the moment.” They used to believe it as such, but now that they knew, they also knew what I really meant every time I said that.
Staring at them as I slipped my shoes on, I wondered if they felt something when they heard me tell that lie. I wondered if they felt something, anything from it. I wondered if they felt the same frustration, the same anger that I did. The frustration of telling a lie. The anger that I couldn’t talk about my boyfriend who I loved, but instead had to pretend that I fancied some girl. I reached out and grabbed my coat, slipping it on before I looked at them. Looked at them looking at me. Their eyes told me the same story that they’d told all week. I didn’t react. I simply spun on my foot, opened the door, and stepped out.
The sky was cloudy above, but it didn’t stop the smile on my face. For as long as I was outside of those doors, I was free.
I was free.
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