Date: Sun, 24 Nov 2002 04:03:23 EST
From: GreenMeccatoon@aol.com
Subject: Bitter and Sweet Chapter 1

If you are not of legal age or if homosexuality bothers you don't read this
story.

Please tell me what you think of this story. I like to hear feedback.
Email me Greenmeccatoon@aol.com

I wrote this story as a way to deal what was happening in my life a year
ago. Some of it relates to me. Some of it I wished happened.

Copyright Green Meccatoon 2002


Bitter and Sweet
By Green Meccatoon

Chapter 1
Forgive


Far away somewhere in my mind I think of a perfect family. They laugh they
hug they kiss and they even enjoy being around me. That family loved me.
They actually acknowledge that I was there and that I needed them. My real
family is never there. I sit alone on my birthday in the kitchen. Before
school realizing that nobody was going to come and say happy birthday to
me. Then again I really didn't expect them to be there.  When I was younger
my parents never missed a birthday. Now I'm seventeen and they act like I
don't exist.

Today was a beautiful day. Everybody at school smiled, laughed and played
around. As for me I decided to sit away from the people that I called
friends. They didn't even know that I was unhappy. They thought I was as
happy as they were, but without a doubt they never forgot each other's
birthday. I ate my lunch and walked past my so-called friends they didn't
even acknowledge that I wasn't there. They Just kept on laughing and
playing with their food.

I sat on the schoolbus after a day of being ignored. When I got closer to
my bus I noticed my parents car in the garage. They were home.  Suddenly I
awoke from my numbness and ran all the way home. When I opened the door
there was no surprise, no happy birthday and no hello. I hanged my head and
headed for my room. I slammed the door shut and cried myself to sleep.

The next morning a fucking bird outside of my window woke me up. I got
ready for school and walked down stairs towards the kitchen. My mother sat
opposite my father and my sister sat in the middle holding both of their
hands.

"Good morning," said my mother and I mumbled something back.

That was the first time in weeks she had said something to me, and all she
could say was good morning like I was one of her clients.

"Brian I need you to take care of Katie today,"

"No."

"Why not?" Yelled my father back.

I started to walk away but I stopped and turned to them.

"After three weeks of not talking to me all you manage to say to me is good
morning, and that's only because you need me to take care of your favorite
child Katie.  Now check your calendar and tell me what date it is? Did you
forget something?"

My parents frowned at each other. They looked embarrassed and my mom gave
me apologetic eyes. I gave her a cold stare back and watched as she
retreated into her own shell. My father tried to put a hand on my shoulder
and I slapped it back.

"Brian I am." He tried to finish but I cut him off.

"No that's not good enough. I didn't want a present. I didn't want a party.
All I wanted was you there to say happy birthday to me."

With that I picked up my bag and headed to school. I could hear my father
call out to me but I didn't care. I wasn't coming home tonight.

I got on the bus and all my friends gave me the same apologetic eyes my
mother had given me.

"Fuck off," I said and sat in the back away from them.

Now I was mad and they couldn't take that away from me. I looked out the
window the twenty-minute ride to school.  Thinking of how I was going to
get away. How I was going to get back at my parents. How I was going to get
back at my friends.

The school day went by fast. A couple of my former friends tried to talk to
me but I blew them off. I wasn't in the mood and they were making me
madder.

The only good thing that happened that day was that I met Chase.

He sat next to me at my last period class and we hit it off. We made plans
to hang out and play video games tonight.

===============================================================================

Somewhere across the cafeteria a group of people sits together all looking
at Brian.

"I wonder what crawled up his ass?" asked a girl with blond pigtails.

"Maybe the fact that we all forgot his birthday yesterday. I mean when has
he forgotten any of our birthdays," said a boy with black hair.

"He's right you know." said another boy with blond hair.

"I hope he talks to us soon."

"He won't, and he won't let us make the first move. People face it we
fucked up, and we can't make it better. We lost a good friend," the boy
with the black hair said trying to hide his tears.

===============================================================================

The days went and I started to hang with new people at school. My parents
tried every trick in the book to make it up to me. I turned each and every
one of them down. My former friends saw me in the hallway and tried to say
hi, but I blatantly ignored them. I felt happier my new friends were
popular and they were actually a nice crowd.

"Hey Brian dude we're going to the beach wanna come." Chase asked as we
walked down the main hallway of our school.

"Sure chase." I couldn't say no to his gorgeous green eyes.

We walked out of the school and I headed to the parking lot. My father was
there with a brand new focus and he tossed me the keys.

"I hope you like it. I got a dark blue one. Happy Birthday," he said with a
dopey smile on his face. I got mad and I tossed them back. I motioned for
chase to lead me to his car.

Chase was looking at me all the way to the beach.

"What?" I asked out of frustration.

"Well it's not every day that you see a teenager throw back the keys of a
brand new car back to his father like he didn't want it."

"He tries to buy my forgiveness with a new car and I'm supposed to jump for
joy. I don't forgive people very easily."

"Why? What did he do?" chase asked as we parked on the boardwalk.

"My parents ignored me for Three weeks and then had the nerve to forget my
birthday. The next day as if that wasn't enough they ask me to take care of
my little sister with no remorse to what they did." I said starting to cry.

Chase gave me a hug and held me for a long period of time then we headed
for the beach. The beach was fun. I felt happy again. My new friends were
fun. And I was getting more and more attracted to Chase. He would smile at
me and my heart would skip a beat. God, he was like a little piece of
perfection sat there for me to admire. His gorgeous face, his blond hair,
and his ever-sparkling green eyes met mine, almost like their sparkle was
meant just for me.

We stayed at the beach for a couple of hours and then headed for a Pizza
shop at the end of the boardwalk.

I sat next to Chase and Lindsey. I felt accepted like I knew these people
all of my life. Lindsey leans in and whispers to my ear, " He likes you and
you like him go for it."

I smile back at her and wonder how she knew. She nods.

On the ride back I can't help but stare at him. His green eyes accentuate
his boyish but manly face. His blond hair spiked at the front and his
slightly muscular physique. I was getting hard when he looked at me.

He parked the car in front of my house and leaned in to kiss me. My heart
skipped as we held the kiss.

"I needed that," I said to myself as I came into my house. My parents were
waiting for me in the living room but I couldn't be bothered. Just seeing
them brought me down from my high, and I headed straight for my room.

On my bed were several birthday cards and the keys to the Focus. I put them
all in a box and placed them outside of my door.

That night I slept better than I have ever had. The morning came and I
decided to skip breakfast. I saw the hurt in my mother's eyes as I walked
by her, but she put it upon herself. When I walked out of the door she
grabbed me and gave me a hug.

I looked at her in the eyes and said "No."

That day I walked around school in a daze. I knew that I had to forgive my
parents but I didn't want to.  If I did that would make me weak. The only
person that could make me smile was Chase.

"I saw him at lunch with Lindsay and the rest of my new friends. They
cheered us when we sat together. That made me feel wonderful like I
belonged in the happy crowd, but as I turned and looked at my old friends
they looked miserable.

===============================================================================

That night I went home and apologized to my parents, but they wouldn't let
me apologize. They in turn apologized to me. I felt the warmth that was
missing from my family in a long time. I even played with my sister Katie.
We had a good time as a family and my parents cried when I hugged them
both.

"So who is the boy that you were kissing?" Asked my father as I stared at
him in disbelief.

"Honey we know that you are gay and it doesn't phase us. We just wish you
would have told us so we could deal better," my mother said looking
concerned.

At some points in my life I get defensive especially when I feel like I'm
being cornered. So I stood up and yelled, "when was I supposed to tell you
when you ignored me for three weeks."

I got mad and I headed out the door. The only place I knew I could go to
was Chase's house. When I reached his house he was outside on his porch
staring at the sky.

He saw me crying and immediately came over to comfort me.

"Brian what's wrong?"

"It's my parents they just don't get it."

"Why what happened?"

"I tried to forgive them today and they tried to make it about them again.
They knew I am gay but they are disappointed that I didn't tell them when
they ignored me for three weeks."

He led me inside and we headed to his room. We spent the night in each
other's embrace. His parents asked us what we wanted for breakfast in the
morning. I felt uncomfortable but Chase assured me that they knew.

Chase lent me some of his clothes and then we headed for the beach. It was
a beautiful Saturday. The beach was packed everybody was there. We met at
the arcade.

"So how's it going?" Lindsay asked me.

"It's going good I think I am falling for him."

She gave everybody the excuse that we were going to get something to
drink. We started walking and she said, " I have to tell you something."

"What."

"Do you know why Chase became good friends with you?"

"No we just sort of clicked and then we started to hang out."

"Well he's liked you for a long time."

"He has," I asked a little surprised.

"Yeah, but listen I know what happened to your old friends. I know you have
a hard time forgiving people, and I hope if Chase ever does something to
make you that mad you have to forgive him. He takes rejection equally as
bad as you forgive people."

We walked back to the group in silence and I knew that what she said was
right.  We spent the whole day at the beach and then made a bonfire at
night. Chase sat behind me hugging me tight under a blanket. I wanted this
moment to last forever. Everybody was having a good time we were singing we
were laughing but sadly it came to an end. We all headed home. I gave Chase
a kiss and walked out of his car. My parents were in the living room
waiting for me again.

"Hi Brian," my mother said with a little uncertainty to her voice.

"Hi," I said and sat In the Living room.

She smiled at me and I smiled back. We knew everything was forgotten, and
my father tossed me the keys to the focus. Two down seven more to go...


Copyright Green Meccatoon 2002