Disclaimer: All characters and events in this story are made up. All characters in this story belong to myself, use without asking permission may warrant castration, or punishment to as severe a degree. Again, this is a story of fiction. The context of this story may contain a little homosexual something' something'. If this offends you, do not read. All readers under the age of thirteen (13) must be accompanied by an adult or legal guardian of the age of eighteen (18) to partake in this entertaining experience. If you actually read this disclaimer and actually believed any of it, you are a dumb shit. Please, all employees wash hands before returning to the work place, because that's just nasty.
My apologies for the large length of time spanning chapter updates. Life has been...well, life. I didn't drop off the face of the planet for a year, I've just been particularly busy. Some of it you will read about, the rest is just for your imagination. Enjoy this chapter though, because it's been a year in the making. --A. Carmichael
Bumping Into Love
The first weekend in March, the boys, Caroline and I
went out on the town. Eric, Steve, Brian
and a couple of the other guys wanted to go to a bar, while Caroline, Chris,
Greg, and I wanted to do a little dancing.
We opted to go to Viva on
Even though I was still slightly angry with Eric, I wanted to go out with his friends. Out we went. Caroline and I had fun dancing with Chris and Greg while the other guys were sitting at the bar talking and laughing about who knows what. When I had gone up to get drinks, I noticed that Eric was really throwing them down tonight. I had never seen him drink so much. We didn't say much to each other, but when I came up to the bar he would watch me intensely. I got tired of his stares, so Chris started getting me my drinks. I was only drinking Cokes at the beginning of the night, and didn't plan on drinking all that much. I was trying to cut back. But I didn't tell Chris that, and he was bringing me rum and Cokes. After the first few I was starting to get pretty tipsy, and gained my courage again to go up to the bar. Steve was obviously drunk and said to Eric when I went up to the bar:
"Hey how many shots can the kid take?"
Now that just hurt my ego. Kid? I hadn't been called that in a non-endearing context in years. So, being the guy I am, and with my ego on the line, I decided to step up to the plate.
"Kid? Who are you calling kid?" I asked. Eric glanced over at me with a cocky grin, and replied to Steve.
"The term `two and you're through' was definitely invented just for him." He looked back over at me after he had said it with that same cocky grin on his face. That one dug deep. I wasn't going to let him crush my ego anymore.
"Oh really? Well speaking of other things I take very little of, I guess it isn't very much when you tell me to take it all." I replied to Eric with a cocky grin of my own.
"Ouch, man. That's got to hurt." Steve said laughing.
"Okay bucko!" Eric said with an emphasis on bucko, "Let's end this right now. You and me..."
"You and I, dipwad." I cut him off, correcting his grammar.
"Were drinking till we can't drink anymore."
"Name your drink, cowboy."
"Jagermiester." He said emphasizing every syllable.
"You fucking bastard." I replied after a minute of giving him a death stare.
"Hey man, you said name your drink."
"You fucking know I can't stand that shit."
"Oh I know, and I love it."
Steve got the bottle from the bartender and a few shot glasses for the two of us.
"Do I get a chaser?" I asked.
"Nope, we're going straight tonight."
"Bastard." I repeated giving Eric a death stare. He just smiled. "Cheers" was all he said, after our drinks were poured. I was really pissed with Eric, and I didn't care how much I hated this shit, I was going to down it all. Everything is at least 70% mental, and I was not going to give in without a fight. I looked down at the drink, and on the count of three held it up to my mouth, and downed it. Man that shit tasted horribly. It burned slightly, but it was the taste of cough syrup that I mainly associated it with. I was determined not to show Eric how much discomfort I was in. I smiled with a cold face.
"Give me another, big boy." And so Steve poured us another round. After I finished that one, I still had that cold smile on my face.
"You done?" Eric asked.
"Far from it, let's go asshole."
"Such a dirty mouth he has on him." Steve remarked while pouring the third round. This continued for a few more rounds. On the eight round, the alcohol was really starting to kick in and mix more with the buzz I already had from the rum and Coke. I really wasn't doing so well. But I wasn't going to give into Eric though, not just yet at least.
"Come on boys. Keep `em coming. I don't got all night."
"He's really holding out tonight." Steve commented.
"This is what happens when you insult his ego." Eric said with the same cocky grin as before, only this time, he had more of a swagger to him. Eric was drunk. I'd never seen him that drunk before.
"Fuck you asshole. Give me another." I said, as we proceeded. Five shots later and I was piss-ass drunk. I took number twelve, and almost puked. Jagermiester is one of the few drinks that I can't stand. No matter how drunk I am, it's always difficult to get it down.
"What? You're done already?"
"How many was that?" I asked, my brain completely disoriented.
"Twelve." Steve replied.
"Okay, one more." I downed it, and felt it coming back up as I stood there. "Ha, see I did way more than two, you fucker." I said laughing.
"You done?" Steve asked nicely.
"Nicely done my friend. I'm very impressed." Steve again replied nicely.
"I'm too drunk right now to figure out if you are mocking me or not, so I'm gonna go find Chris." I said, while Eric again stared at me intensely. So I stumbled my way over to Chris who was dancing with what appeared to be a very pretty girl, but then again, I couldn't tell my right hand from my left at the time.
"Hey bud, where've you been?" He said still dancing with the girl.
"I feel like I'm gonna hurl." I said, my speech slightly slurred.
"Ut oh, you need me to take you to the bathroom?"
"Okay dude." He said, walking me in towards the bathroom.
"Where did you go? And why are you so drunk?"
"Eric and Steve were at the bar. And they were being bastards. And I decided to take shots with them."
"How many did you take?"
"Ummm... over ten."
"Jesus Andrew, you can't drink that much. No wonder you need to puke."
He brought me into the bathroom, and took me into a stall where I sat on the floor for a minute next to the toilet.
"What were you drinking?"
"Damn, you drank ten shots of Jager, you hate that shit."
"I think it was fourteen, and I know." I said, making up a number of how many I took. I sat in front of the toilet for about five minutes, but nothing was coming up, and my stomach was starting to settle, so I got up to see Chris sitting on the sinks.
"Yeah, thanks bud."
"No problem." He replied smiling. We went back out, and found that the guys had left the bar, we found Caroline and she said that they had decided to go to another bar. That was fine with me, now Eric wouldn't be staring at me from across the room. I told myself I was just going to drink water for the rest of the night, but found myself having sips of Caroline's drinks. Later, she bumped into a couple of her girl friends, and decided to leave with them and go somewhere else. I didn't care. Chris and I were having a fun time. At about I could hardly walk I was so drunk.
"Hey man, I think we should get going." Chris said, holding me from falling over as I got off my bar stool. He led me out to his car, helping me into the passenger seat. Chris had a couple of drinks that night, but only early on, so he was sober to drive. I was fidgeting with the button on his radio for a minute while he waited for the car to warm up. That was the last thing I remember doing that night.
The next morning I awoke slowly with a pounding headache. I was warmly under a pile of blankets, snuggling close with Eric. My head was cuddled into the crook of his neck. Without opening my eyes, I lightly began to kiss his neck. I felt him beginning to stir next to me.
"Morning Eric." I mumbled into his neck still, as I slid my hand across his chest. For some reason, his pectorals seemed a little smaller than normal. As I continued to slide my hand farther into the center of his chest I didn't feel any of the hair that was normally there. That was when my brain kicked in. I jumped up opening my eyes. Lying next to me was a shirtless Chris, who was abruptly woken from my sudden jerk away from him. I freaked out.
"HOLY FUCK!" I yelled, jumping out of the bed, my headache being much less severe as the neurons started firing faster and faster, and ideas began spinning through my head about what I was doing in a bed with Chris. Looking around the room, all my cloths were strewn on the floor, everything except the boxers I was wearing.
"Whoa, whoa, Andrew, calm down." Chris said, starting to get out of his bed.
"What do you mean calm down, Eric's gonna kill me. And you, you're not fucking gay." I said aloud as I pulled me pants off the floor.
"Andrew, would you just shut up for a minute and let me talk. We didn't sleep together."
"Huh?" I asked, looking up, halfway in my pants.
"Well obviously we slept together, but we didn't have sex."
"Then, then why was I asleep in bed with you?" I asked, still half in my pants, my headache slowly beginning to reappear.
"Well, I took you to Eric's house last night, but neither his or Caroline's cars were there, so I brought you back here." He said, sitting on the side of the bed, looking up at me honestly. "You passed out in my car, but you woke up when I tried to pick you up. When you got in, you went into the bathroom and puked a couple of times. And when I was trying to get you to drink some more water, you passed out again, so I brought you in here to sleep, and I was worried you were gonna puke, so I decided to bunk in here with you."
"Are you sure?"
"Dude, I like girls." He said, throwing a pillow at me.
"This is true." I commented with a smile. "You sure you don't like my ass?"
"Well to be honest, it is pretty cute, but I don't think Eric would be too happy with me if I stole a piece." He laughed. Sitting there, I had to admit he was pretty cute himself. I'd never seem him shirtless before, and he had a really nice chest, not as nice as Eric's, but he had a decent pair of pectorals and a nice flat washboard stomach. His sexiest quality was his legs though. All that running from soccer had them sculpted perfectly, and him sitting in just his boxers allowed me to see a lot of them. I smiled.
"I have to admit, you are a really comfy person. I wouldn't mind doing it again sometime." I replied with a wink.
"More comfy than Eric?" He asked with a goofy grin, and his head cocked slightly sideways as he looked up at me.
"You know, that's a tough one." I said after I thought about it for a second. "The worst person to sleep with, though, is Caroline. God, the girl is way to boney. You'd think her boobs would help but they just get in the way. And man, her elbows are so fucking pointy." I said, both of us laughing.
"Yeah those girls are all weird with their boobs."
"What do you see in them?" I asked.
"What boobs or girls?"
"I donno, what do you see in the dick?"
"The cock is sexy man."
"Well so are boobs."
"Whatever." I said smiling. We both laughed some more.
I hung around Chris' apartment for a
while longer. The place was quite big,
and luxurious. He had a large bay window
in the annex in his kitchen that overlooked downtown
Everything about Chris is meticulous. His appearance, his belongings, everything about him is neat and organized. He's always dressed very clean and neatly, and he has great taste in cloths. The fact that he had on Burberry boxers at that moment can contest to the fact. The open door to his walk-in closet showcased numerous bags from designer stores that were hanging on the doorknob and hooks. I found that he mainly preferred Hugo Boss, Ralph Lauren and Burberry.
Looking around his apartment, I could see that the meticulous philosophy also pertained to his living quarters. Like his car, where there was hardly a visible grain of sand or dirt on the rugs, his room was unbelievably spotless as well. I consider myself clean, but this was beyond clean. The only items on the floor of his room were our cloths which he had tossed there from the night before.
His apartment was nicely furnished. The rooms looked like a butch Martha Stewart had decorated them. It seemed like all the rooms used the classic colors of grey, black and white, with mahogany furniture, and a main color of a blue, green or red, respectively. For instance, the main wall of his living room was red, while the others were a stark white. The main wall in his bed room that his bed was next to was blue, with a light grey tone on the other walls. He tended to use vivid colors, but it all was very appeasing to the eye.
This description of Chris might give you the impression that he is OCD or a neat freak, but I felt very relaxed messing up the order of things, and he was very relaxed about it too. I knew that after I left, he'd probably tidy up a bit till he was satisfied and then leave it that way. Chris alone by himself is a very clean person. He just doesn't seem to make messes, so it would be understandable why his apartment was so clean. By all means, he doesn't go around vacuuming and dusting every day when he gets home.
"Hey Chris, how long have you lived here?" I asked as we were in his kitchen eating.
"Since second semester sophomore year."
"So about two years?"
"You've lived here all by yourself for two years?"
"Doesn't that get boring?"
"No, I really like it. You know how I like to keep to myself, and plus I don't have to put up with someone else's mess."
"Yeah, `cause you're OCD." I joked.
"Ha, funny." He said, trying to stifle a smile.
"Would you be upset with me if I got you a puppy for your birthday?" I asked innocently.
"You are not getting me a puppy." He replied emphatically.
"But you need something to preoccupy you."
"No I don't. That's what I have friends for."
"Whatever you say." I replied with a devilish grin.
My fight with Eric started March off on a very bad foot. That occurred the first week of the month. The second Monday of the month, the eighth, was even worse. The fact that it was a Monday was enough to have made it bad, but I had had a horrible day at school. I had gotten back a test which I got a C on and was pissed with myself. Eric seemed to not be returning my phone calls. The fact that I had been up till about the night before finishing a paper caused me to be sleep deprived and longing for a nap.
When I stepped into the house, I headed towards my room on my way to lie down for a little while and relax. Though, when I walked into my room and saw my mom, folding cloths and packing them in a bag, I was quite surprised.
"Mom, why are you packing my bag?"
"Oh, honey you're home, I didn't hear you come in." My mom said, as she looked up at me, her eyes were read and puffy and she looks like she had been hit by a truck.
"Mom, what happened?" I asked sincerely while I hugged her.
father called an hour ago. He was having
lunch with Chris Stratton. They were
talking and Chris just keeled over in the restaurant."
She said, the tears rolling down her eyes
again. I was staring at her like she had
a third eye. "He had a massive heart
attack. They couldn't stabilize
him. He died on the way to the hospital
Andrew." I saw my mom's mouth moving and
the tears rolling down her eyes, but I didn't hear anything else.
I was in shock.
I couldn't believe the words that had just
come out of my mother's mouth. Chris
Stratton, by dad's best friend, was dead.
I had just seen him a month ago when I was in
"The wake is tomorrow and the funeral Wednesday. I told your father we'd be in the city tonight. So I figure we should start leaving soon. After your father called, I sat for a little while, thinking over what I had just heard. And then I decided I should come up and start packing. I figured out what I needed and then came in here and started packing your clothing. Only, I forgot what cloths you have in the city, so I decided to pack it all just in case." She rambled as I looked over at my bed that was covered in practically every article of clothing I owned.
"Mom...mom...mom... it's okay." I said, finally getting her attention and pulling her into a hug. "It's okay. I'll get it under control. You just go get your stuff and put it in the car. I'll go make you some tea, and then I'll finish packing. You need to just go sit and calm down." I said, still holding her in a hug, and kissing her on the forehead.
"Are you sure you don't need any help?"
"Yeah, I've got it under control. Why don't you go call Els and Scott and see how they are doing." I said.
"Okay, thanks for keeping a straight head, honey."
"I love you mom."
"I love you too."
Logic always takes over in my head when stuff like this happens. It takes me a few minutes to understand what has actually happened, but after that, I seem to go into an instinctual mode where I can think everything not important through, like packing cloths, calling people, and making arrangements. I had done the same thing two years ago when my grandfather died. My mother again was a mess, and somehow I made sure everything got done.
Once I made sure my mother was
really packed, which she was. I got down
to the business of cleaning up the mess in my room. All we really needed were
toiletries and comfortable cloths to relax in.
I had a suit and dress cloths in
My parents embraced each other in a huge hug when we got up to the apartment. They stood that way for a couple of minutes not saying anything, just holding each other. I pulled my father into a hug once my mom had let him go.
My father had called Scott and Elspeth after he
phoned my mother. Els was getting on the
next plane she could, and Scott, well I wasn't sure if he was going to come
I got into my pajamas and took up the post of watching television myself, waiting for Elspeth to come home. At some late hour, I heard her come into the foyer, and ran through and gave her a hug. We stayed in the embrace for a minute or two. We didn't say much, but she was going to unpack and then meet me in the den. She returned a few minutes later in her pajamas and sat down next to me on the couch.
"How are you holding up?" I asked her when she pulled the blanket I had over herself.
"I can't believe he's dead. He's only, what, 56?" She said, a few tears rolling down her cheeks.
"When mom told me, the only thing I could think of was dad. It could have easily happened to him, and it really scared me." I responded.
We talked some more, and when Elspeth's stomach started to growl, we got up and got some food. She had called Scott when she got to the airport, and he was waiting to board a plane. They hadn't really talked much, but Scott said not to wait up for him, he was just going to catch a cab when he got into JFK. We on the other hand decided we were going to wait up for him. I made Elspeth and myself sandwiches, we ate and entire bag of potato chips, and finished off a tub of ice cream, we were headed for our own heart attack as we munched down more shit when Scott came in.
He walked into the den, and I jumped up, running to him as he pulled me into a hug. I hadn't cried yet, but once I saw Scott, I just broke down into to tears. I'm sure it was some subconscious thing where I was thinking, its okay Scott's here you don't have to make sure everything is okay anymore. He kept me in a hug for a couple of minutes, and then brought me over to the couch. We sat down and talked some. I was still crying a little when we sat down. He pulled me into another hug, with Els, none of us saying anything. We were just there, together. We talked a little longer, but Elspeth said she needed to go get some sleep. Scott and I stayed up longer, we didn't really talk, but it was nice to be sitting with him. I realized at one point too that I was cuddled up to him sort of like I would have with Eric, or was it the other way around? Did I do the things with Eric that I did with Scott, but only in a more intimate way? I caused me to laugh a little.
"What are you laughing about?" He asked.
"I was just thinking how you and Eric have the same effect on me."
"Oh really? I make you horny?" He asked laughing.
"No, but you both relax me. I feel safe and secure when I'm with you." I stated after laughing at his comment.
"Well thanks for the compliment." He said smiling.
"You're certainly welcome." We were soon in bed, sleeping soundly.
The next day we spent as a family. It was a quiet day, us kids comforting our parents, especially my dad. My mother came in and woke me up the next morning at around nine. We had a quiet breakfast as a family and then got ready for the funeral. It was a nice service. It was weird looking at the casket and knowing that Chris was actually in it. As I looked around, there were so many blank faces. There were a lot of familiar faces in the sea of people that filled the church. I looked forward and saw Nicki and Ryan, Chris' kids, a few pews forward to the left. They both had black, expressionless faces. My dad went up and eulogized Chris. My dad didn't really seem like a public speaker, well at least in my experiences. I had really never heard him get in front of a group of people and say all that much. He also always seemed very apathetic, like he just couldn't feel emotion. Again, I guess that must have been just from my experiences, because he was raw standing there. You could see it in his face how much he was fighting back the tears. He had us all laughing with a few anecdotes about memories from grad school, and trips our families had taken together. When he was done with the eulogy, he went back to his seat next to my mother and cried his heart out.
After the service was over, we went over to the Stratton's apartment for the reception. I've only been to a couple of funerals neither of which I could really remember, but everyone was so gloomy. Elspeth hung out with Nicki and a couple of her cousins who were their age. Scott and Ryan were in front of a TV watching some basketball. I decided to check on my father and see how he was. He was in the library talking with his other buddies. My dad had an empty glass of scotch in his hand, and graciously welcomed me to sit next to him on the couch. I think the alcohol was helping a little, because he had a tid bit more life in him. The guys were laughing about some more of the comical times they had shared with Chris. Some of the stories about the strippers had my stomach hurting I was laughing so hard. It was really weird thinking about the company in that room at that moment. Normally I would have felt very intimidated being in such a close intimate setting with them. These men helped run the economy. The fact that Donald Trump had attended the funeral was an indicator of who they were. They were very raw and vulnerable at the time. They had just lost one of their best friends, and they were allowing me to join in their sorrow. I felt honored in a way.
We stayed at the Stratton's until everyone else had
left. Scott, Elspeth and I helped clean
up their apartment, and when most everything was picked up, we decided we were
going to head back home. My mom and dad
stayed late with Audra Stratton and spend some more time, just the three of
them. When the three of us kids got back
to our apartment, we changed into more comfortable cloths and decided to get
some junk food and have a game night.
The three of us and my dad used to do it all the time when we were
little, and since we hadn't done it in a few years, we pulled out the board
games and sat down for a relaxing game of monopoly.
After a couple of hours, I went
bankrupted. I stupidly traded my
That Friday, Scott and I took the
Acela Express from Penn Station. Eric
met me at Providence Station and
I returned to school on Monday, and
caught up on a weeks worth of work I had missed.
I was really stressed because that was my
last week before spring break, and all the teachers were having tests before we
were off for two weeks. Not only did I
have to do twice as much work, but I had to take tests on new information I
hardly knew. After the ordeal with Chris
Stratton, it seemed like my fight with Eric had never existed.
He was being extremely affectionate with me,
trying to cheer me up as much as possible.
Finally that last Friday
came and went. I didn't go out and
party, instead I stayed home with my mom, went to bed early and slept most of
the day Saturday. When I woke up, I
drove up to
We crawled into bed at about two thirty, but I didn't feel like sleeping. I wasn't going to see Eric for two weeks, and I was going to miss him. I lay with my head on his chest, my left arm draped over his side, while my right lay under me. I lied this way for about fifteen minutes. I could tell Eric was asleep from the way he was breathing. I move me hand slowly down Eric's chest, and down his abdominals. I slowly slipped my fingers under the waistband of his boxers and grasped him in my hand. He made a slight moan, as I began to stroke him. I could feel him hardening in my grasp.
"Mmm, baby what are you up to?" He asked after a couple of minutes of my toying.
"Having a little fun." I responded.
"I thought you just wanted to have a quiet evening tonight."
"Since when does that mean I don't want sex?"
"I donno, you just didn't seem in the mood." He laughed rolling on top of me. He kissed me passionately on the lips, as his hands roamed over my bare chest. He finally reached into my boxers and stroked me. I moaned into his mouth from his pleasuring. After a long time of this passionate kiss, and exploring each other's bodies, he got up out of the bed, pulling his boxers off. He reached down, and pulled mine off of me also, and then reached into my bed side table, getting out the lube and condoms.
When he came back into bed he pulled me on top of him, again kissing me passionately. I ground into his stomach, as his hands traveled down my back. His left hand rested on the cleft of my back, while his right pulled my butt tighter against him, adding more pleasure to my grinding. In one powerfull movement, I was on my back with him on top of me, covering my small frame. He spread my legs, so that I could feel him rubbing up against the cleft of my butt. We continued this kissing and rubbing for a while, just enjoying the contact with one another and the enjoyable pleasure that came with it. But soon, Eric's cold, lubed fingers found my opening and slowly slid into me. He had me moaning into his shoulder as I lightly bit him when he almost brought me to climax with his large digits. After a few more minutes of pleasant torture, he slid out of me, and prepped himself with a condom. He whispered into my ear, and nibbled on my neck as he entered me, slowly, and gently. He began his easy rhythm as I met my hips with his. His lips, after working that spot on my neck, returned to my lips, his right hand was sliding up and down the back of my thigh, a sensation he found that oddly sent chills up and down my spine. He supported himself with his left hand, while he quickened his pace, sending even more waves through my body. Every inch of my skin became hypersensitive as we made love. The hairs on his chest were rubbing against my skin, sending even more waves of pleasure through my body.
We did eventually finish with another euphoric explosion, but not for a long time. When I fell asleep cuddled up next to him, it was pretty late in the morning. The sun wasn't up yet, but was on its way. Eric's soft gental stroking of my stomach soothed me to sleep, as he softly kissed the back of my neck, and whispered quietly into my ear. I was pretty sure I heard the word love, but unfortunately, I was too tired, and he was to quiet to understand.
"Love you, stud." I mumbled.
"I know you do baby. I love you too...with all my heart. Now go to sleep."
I awoke late Sunday afternoon to an absence of Eric. When I rolled over, I heard the crunch of paper. Rolling back over, I sat up, and read the note.
I couldn't bear to wake you
this morning. You looked too peaceful to
wake, but I had to get going otherwise I'd miss my flight.
I'm really going to miss you these next
couple of weeks. Have fun in
Love you, Eric
I rolled over and sunk my head into the pillow that Eric had slept on. His smell was all over it. My heart started to ache as it finally sunk in. I wasn't going to see Eric for two weeks. I sighed as I got out of bed.
I came down to the kitchen to the site of my dad cooking at the stove.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, surprised to see him.
"Well hello to you too." He replied turning away from the stove to greet me. "I'm glad you're up. I'm making grilled cheese, so why don't you just skip breakfast and go straight to lunch."
"Grilled cheese and tomato soup?"
"Of course!" He exclaimed with a faux shock as if I would dare think of grilled cheese without tomato soup.
"So, what's the occasion?"
"Nothing special, I just decided to come home this week while you're off."
"Oh really? Does that mean you'll be in your office the whole time, or will you actually be doing stuff with me?" I asked a little bitterly.
"Such hostility." He said, setting the food down on the counter in front of where I was sitting. I rolled my eyes at his comment.
"Honestly. I've put my number two man in charge this week. Besides, you're gonna be sick of me by the end of it." He stated with a grin a lot like one that Scott and I both have. It meant only one thing. He had something planned.
"What do you have planned?"
"We're going on a road trip."
"Huh?" I stated, making a noise with a mouthful of food.
since you are going away to
"Okay... don't you think it's a bit early?"
"No, not at all. I think the faster you get it done, the better off you'll be. Scott wished he had started his junior year, and Elspeth was glad she got it all done in the spring. She even had her applications done over the summer, and relaxed her senior year."
"Well where are we going?"
"It depends where you want to look. I figured you'd want to look at the Ivy's, but other than that I'm really not sure."
I think I want to be in a city, particularly,
"Not really BU, but I'm interested in BC."
"Okay, well we might be able to squeeze that all in one day, but we'll see. We could go up to Brown today..."
"I don't really want to look at Brown. I want to get away from Rhode Island." I stated, cutting him off.
"Fair enough, that's off the list. Any interest in Yale?"
"No, not really."
now in the
"And George Washington too."
"Okay, so all three of those are on the list?"
"Are you interested in Cornell, or Dartmouth?"
"No not really."
The whole trip had been
planned out. Harvard and MIT in
My father and I had about six hours of driving ahead
of us. Dido was playing from the
speakers as we cruised down Interstate 95 through
These intimate settings with my father really showed
how similar we really are. Unlike my
siblings, my parents and I enjoy the same types of music.
It was my mother who got my father into Tori
Amos, and it was he who got me into her.
In fact, I'd say that my father is borderline obsessive.
He has ever album of hers, including the
singles and bootlegs. His prized
possession is her first album, Y Kan't
Tori Reed?, a very rare CD which he paid something like a hundred dollars for.
He's been to every one of her concerts in
We arrived at our hotel at about and were in our room lounging in front of the television. We had a quiet dinner out, and decided to see a movie while we had nothing else to do. It was the first movie I'd seen in the theaters with my father since I was about eleven. We thought it was a sad statement when we came to the realization, but nothing else was further said about it after the awkward silent moment engulfed us.
My visit to the
For some reason I really enjoy riding in the
car. Strangely it is one of my favorite
things. As a kid with my mom driving me
to school, I loved the snowy days when I'd sit in the perfectly warm seat,
listening to my CD player as I looked out the window at the white scenery.
Unfortunately there wasn't any snow that day
on the drive down to
When we got to D.C. we stopped at
I went to dinner with my father who met up with one
of his old friends from school. It
seemed that they hadn't talked in a couple of years, but they caught up quickly.
It turns out the guy was a Congressman from
When I got to the hotel room I saw that I had two
messages on my cell phone, one was from my mother calling to see how my day
was, and the other was from Eric. My
heart did a little flip in my chest when I heard his voice.
He was in
"Oh hey baby." He said waking up quickly after hearing my voice and figuring out that it was me.
"Well, I haven't seen much of it other than the train station, my hotel and a near by restaurant, but what I have seen has been beautiful."
you just get in from
"Yeah, we took to the Chunnel and got to the hotel at about four."
"Why aren't you out on the town tonight finding some hot Parisian?"
"Well there are a number of reasons, the main one being that last night I got piss ass drunk in London and ended up having a wild night of hot sex with what seemed to be a plethora of amazingly fabulous English boys that kept appearing out of no where. I had so much sex I can't even get hard."
"Did they have good teeth?" I asked playing along with his sarcasm.
"Good to know."
"I can't even get hard thinking about you naked."
"That's a let down, I have the hotel room all to myself, and I really wanted to try phone sex for the first time."
"Why are you in a hotel room?"
"My dad, spur of the moment, decided to go on a college search trip."
"Oh, good times, I remember mine very well. Where are you at the moment?"
"Oh, good schools."
so what is the real reason that you are in bed in
real reason would be that I did get really drunk last night in our last hurrah
"Oh, sounds like a fun time with the crew."
"You know it."
"So how about that phone sex?"
"Sorry babe, though I am really horny and would love to, Chris is reading in the bed next to me."
"So, just take the phone into the bathroom or something."
"Oh, and like that isn't obvious. He knows I'm talking to you, and he's not stupid. He'd tell the guys and I'd never hear the end of it?" At the end of his statement there was a slight pause with murmur in the background which caused Eric to laugh.
"What's so funny?"
"Chris just asked if we were talking about phone sex." That caused me to laugh myself.
"That silly Chris, he's always right on the mark. Put him on the phone for a second, I want to talk to him."
"Okay, one second."
"Hello?" It was Chris.
"Hey dude, what's up?"
"Well, could you go into another room so I can have some nice phone sex with Eric?"
"Oh come on man, you aren't actually being serious."
"Well I don't really know. It sounds like a fun proposition, it being the first time and all, but it sounds kind of desperate at the same time."
"You are so weird." He said laughing.
"Yeah, and I'm horny."
"Well, I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but I'm just being a good friend and not letting you do such a destructive thing." He said in a serious tone.
"Oh come on, didn't you mother ever tell you it's a sin to play with yourself?" I started laughing.
"Wow dude. No she never told me that. Though I'm sure having sex with another man is much more of a sin than masturbating."
"Such a dirty mouth you have."
"Well if you're going to be an ass, can you give the phone back to my boyfriend?"
"Hey." It was Eric again.
"So the phone sex is a no go."
"I guess." I said with a big sigh of serious disappointment. "Looks like I'm gonna have to just jack off without you."
"I guess so babe."
"Well this phone call I'm sure is going to be quite expensive, so I should hang up."
"Okay baby. I miss you."
"I miss you too."
you. Have a fun time in
"Love you too. Have a great rest of your trip."
"Bye stud." And with that I hung up.
George Washington was a blast.
I loved it.
It had been my favorite school so far.
We went to a morning tour, and then had lunch on campus at the
Now, my grandmother is a very interesting woman. She's the matriarch of my father's side of the family. She is a very conservative woman, but at the same time she's very eccentric. Once you get past her political views and such, she's a very loveable woman. She's very strong willed. After having five kids and becoming a senator's wife, you have to be strong willed. Mix that with her southern heritage and you've got a woman to be reckoned with. There are three rules to follow with Jane. Never say the lord's name in vain without adding an H, never bring up liberal politics and most of all, never say anything insulting about one of her grandchildren. She doesn't give a rat's ass what you say about her children, but say something negative about one of her grandchildren and she will chew you up and spit you out so fast you'll wish you never had lived. Visits with her are always interesting. She has many old quirky rules, for instance, denim is not to be worn on the nice furniture, and nothing is to be eating off of anything but fine china. She also has rules about proper attire to be worn to the yacht, and country clubs at particular seasons. Though she may seem like a tough person to spend time with, she's actually very easy going. As long as your follow her rules, you can do anything else you want just as long as it's within the rules.
We arrived at the old house, the
same one my father grew up in. Driving
up the driveway to the old white plantation house always makes me feel like I
should be in some old book such as Huckleberry Finn, or To Kill a
Mockingbird. We walked into the house,
leaving our bags in the car. My
grandmother came to greet us in the front hall with hugs and kisses, her strong
will contradicting her old frail body that was showing times wear.
She then ushered us into the living room for
a lively talk, while my father's sibling that live in the
All my father's siblings have been very
successful in each of their respective fields.
My father, the middle child is the power banker and investor in
Being the Yankee's of the group, we
tend to not see the rest of the family all that often due to our location
several hundred miles north. Though,
when we do make it down, the family does congregate as best as possible.
That night, everyone except Susan, the eldest
After dinner, the men went off to my
grandfather's study to talk about who knows what, while the women went to the
living room to also talk about who knows what.
My cousin and I went out onto the porch and sat in the wicker rockers
and talked for a little while. Julia was
the first person I came out to. Two
summers before at her mother's beach house on the
"Hey Andrew," my father said breaking the silence in the car somewhere along the New Jersey Turnpike, "I was thinking."
"Well, I feel kind of bad about not getting you a car for Christmas."
"What are you talking about?"
"Well, I got your sister and your brother new cars when they got their licenses, and I don't know. It seems that with you, I've always either just blown you off, or canned you to the backseat."
"Dad, it's totally okay, I understand where you were coming from."
"No Andrew, it's not okay. It really isn't. I just haven't been in your life for the past few years. Even when you were little, I still never gave you the amount that I gave Elspeth and Scott, and I'm sorry for it. Chris' death really awoke me to all of this. The truth is that I really don't know my son. You're mother rants and rants about all the stuff you are doing at school, and about how happy you are, and I haven't been there to see any of it."
"Dad...it's really okay. You were busy with work."
"No Andrew, I don't think you understand me. I chose all of this. When your mother told me that she thought you might be gay... well it scared me. I knew you then. You were such an amazing kid.
"Wait, wait, wait a minute... You and mom knew I was gay before I told you?"
"Well yes, your mother suspected it, I was in complete denial about it all. I mean, what else could you ask for? Innocent I guess would be a world I'd use to describe you growing up. You were so kind hearted. You could never grasp issues of hate and war. I remember one time when there was a clip on the news about the Arab Israeli crisis, and you couldn't understand why the people were fighting. You seemed to always only see the good in things, and look past the bad. But, I was mainly so worried about you. I never wanted you to have the difficult life you'd have to face. No father wants that for their children. The ironic thing is that I feel that I've given you the most difficult time. I seemed to also forget that you were not only my good hearted, innocent child, but you seemed to not give a shit about what other people thought." He said, with a chuckle. "And, I'm really sorry about everything I've done in the past few years. I still love you, everything about you."
"I still love you too dad."
"Don't get me wrong, I still have a year and some time to try to make up the past what, three years? You know Andrew, I've worked all my life, and don't tell your mother, but I'm thinking about retiring and leaving my number two man in charge."
"Yeah, it would give me more time to play around with my toys...and spend time with my family."
"You not work? That's almost an oxymoron."
"Well you might want to start getting used to the idea. You're the captain of the soccer team next year right?"
"Well, I think it might be a good year to actually start going to your games."
"Are you actually thinking about doing all of this, or is this some white lie you've all planned in your head?"
"Again with the negativity. That's the third time in 6 hours; I must really have been an ass."
"You had your moments." I said flatly.
"I set myself up for that one didn't I?"
"Yeah, you did."
"But anyways... The retirement issue is still in the maybe pile in my head. Don't tell anyone about that, that's just between you and I."
"The second topic of discussion is this boyfriend of yours." I remained silent after his remark.
"What about him?" I replied after a few too many seconds of silence.
"Well, I want to meet him."
"You do?" I said, in shock, causing the car to swerve in the lane a little.
"Yeah, Elspeth and mom said he's a great guy. Scott and I really want to see what's got you all excited."
"Well, maybe we can come down to New York some weekend and you can meet him."
"I'd love for you to do that."
Hearing those words lifted my spirits so high. The rest of the ride was filled with our playful banter about the usual: politics, cars, etc.
When I got home, I had a couple of days to hang out with
friends. Eventually, it was time to pack
for my trip to
I really enjoyed hang out with Scott.
He had some really interesting friends who
showed me around when Scott was busy with work.
I went to the usual sites, the
School started up again, unfortunately. My teachers were really starting to pile on the work towards the end of the year, when I really just wished school would be over. We called it the Spring Sprint. In the afternoons I had sailing practice and regattas which kept me at school till late. I didn't see Eric as much anymore. In the winter, my afternoons were free, so the days he didn't have class after three, I could go up and visit him, or vise versa. Now though, we were both really busy and I only saw him on weekends.
The pain in my leg persisted.
My mom noticed that I was taking Advil and
Tylenol more and more, but wasn't sure why.
About two weeks after spring break, I told her one night at dinner after
I couldn't get to sleep the night before because my leg ached so much.
On top of the pain, because I couldn't get
enough sleep, I did poorly on a test I had, which just added more stress.
We brainstormed what it could be, and after
some thought, figured it was probably just an injury from soccer that was just
popping up now. The next day she called and
scheduled an appointment for the next week with a doctor in
My mom excused me form sailing that next Wednesday.
It was just a practice so it didn't matter
all that much that I was missing it. I
met my mom in one of the
The doctor eventually entered the room, about ten minutes after we were brought into the examination room. He was a fairly young guy. He introduced himself, and asked me what the problem was. I told him, and he asked more questions, such as if I played any sports, etc. After talking with him for about five minutes, he told me that he needed to get some x-rays of my leg, and got a nurse to escort me the x-ray room. I stripped to my boxers, and lay on the x-ray table. The nurse covered my genital region with a lead blanket, or whatever material they used these days, and moved my leg into weird positions. She took five x-rays in all. The process only took about ten minutes, and I was soon back in the examination room with my mother, waiting for the doctor and the results. The doctor strode in yet again, the same smile on his face, only this time minus the introduction. He opened up the large plastic envelope. Earlier, he had talked about how I probably had a hair-line fracture on my femur, or maybe just a bone bruise, both of which could have been from either soccer or sailing. Many don't think sailing is that tough of a sport, but during tacking in the small boats, I have to fling myself to the other side of the boat to get as much speed as possible, and make the tack as quick as possible. This often resulted in a banged knee, shin, and possible my thigh. The doctor placed the x-rays on the light projector, and as I looked closely at the part of my thigh that was hurting, my breath caught in my throat.
My mother and I parted in the parking lot. I told her that I was going to stop by Eric's house and see if he was there, and either spend a little while there, or head back home. I got into my car picked up my phone, and called Eric. "Please, please pick up." I thought to myself.
"Hello?" Eric said on the other end of the line. When I heard his voice, my bravado I'd had for the last fifteen minutes cracked, and the fear came pouring out in tears.
"Eric." I croaked.
"What's wrong baby?" He asked concerned, he could hear it in my voice that I was crying. After I didn't respond he asked, "Where are you? Did you just get out of your doctor's appointment?"
"Eric," I croaked again, "I might have cancer."
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