There's this kid, Peter. If I was in other, previous, times, I'd say I have this admiration for him. I mean, the football team, gosh, they could be in a Dolce & Gabbana ad, very hunky... but they only said and did a lot of shit, true to be said.
On the other hand, kids like Peter... he has this slim beauty... I mean, the players can be gorgeous hot but I could picture some of them fat and with a horrible work a few years from now... but Peter, no, he's slim, erotically hot, you know, has these beautiful features, blue eyes, blond shiny hair, the way he talks... yeah this is it... he has a nice look aand he seems to know everything during classes... to die for...
Yeah, btw, that's what annoys me the most. I study the shit out of me – like I said the other day, I have to fill the social schedule and get my neck around, sneaking out, to have the opportunity to... study... it would be lame if it weren't reality. And even that way, Peter gets to know things `more than me' you know.
So, that Wednesday, after having my usual morning, arguing with Peter about Biology work presentation, oral test during Math class, there I was again, arguing with him.
I mean, I was only talking about how excited I was about football practice... actually I was really anxious `cause I know I did it horribly last seasons and wasn't confident enough, so saying the opposite out loud would give me some credit with the guys and... well, it's positive thought, right?! *shrug* So that, I was talking to the girls during – another, yet – class with Peter.
"...you know, Sheila, `cause I'm gonna make it to the team AGAIN this season. Ashley was there cheering for me too, right?" I was saying.
"'cause, you know, girls, *I* made it well yesterday, not like your friend Peter here." I said and patted on his back.
"Oh, you shut up! Last season YOU MADE the school team lose, like, three lost balls EACH game... at least." Peter said all angry.
I mean, I didn't make anything to him... well, okay, maybe I stretched my luck a little, but only if he knew how much I wanted that place at the football team to make the old man proud... However, I couldn't leave it at that in front of the guys.
"You loser, I'm not a loser like you!" I replied.
"Everybody was there to see it!" he pointed out. How dare he?!
"Fuck off." I said pushing against my chest.
"Hey guys. Quit it now." the teacher said, deadly serious. "You do it in the street or in your house, but here it's my rules, got it? Quiet, now!"
Gee, I don't know how I automatically end up sitting close to him most of the time... as I do have most of classes with him... it's annoying but at the same time I end up doing that I don't know why... ok, maybe that's due to the reasons above, including his pink cheeks, his smile... sigh... aargh, what a weird feeling I can't tell what it is!
I can't leave it at that. I have to say something.
"It's not over, Hershey." I mumbled from my desk.
You know, it sucks when you see you are wrong, that you lost an argument, I mean you `lost', who likes losing?!
BUT, there's no big deal as tonight it's thanksgiving and father has money to put up a great thanksgiving dinner... even to buy a restaurant, yay!
So, I was home waiting for dad to come home. I assumed at first he was taking long because he was running some errand related to the thanksgiving dinner. I wish he was, because, last time, thanksgiving was so sad, as mom had just recently passed away.
Last thanksgiving, everybody in the family's festivity welcomed dad and me so well, they were all very supportive, but still, I missed mom so bad I couldn't enjoy none of that.
However, I wasn't starting this thanksgiving on a happy note either, as it was already ten o'clock – night – and maybe – probably – dad forgot it's thanksgiving or something like that.
So, I got out and went to a Chinese restaurant nearby to take something to eat. It was kind of weird, `cause, I mean, we should love and respect all the people but it seems only the `no family' people were there eating, as it's kind of obvious, as it was thanksgiving. I guess I just wasn't used to that, as thanksgiving used to be so cool when mom used to prepare all of it for the evening.
Anyways, I went back home because I was starved... and sad... that's a bad feeling – I wouldn't say I lost my appetite because I'm a teenager and that never happens – yeah, so, that was it, starved and sad.
Maybe I had a hollow in my stomach and another hollow in my heart.
So, I ate at the blank table. I put the food in a plate, not to eat in the restaurant's packing, to look a little `better', a little less like `non special day eating'... Secretly, I hoped dad would arrive late, saying he's sorry with some special food in hands. Unfortunately, that night, it never happened.
I brushed my teeth and had to wash my hands twice, because, you know, when you buy this kind of food you gotta brush your teeth and wash your hands... it has a different smell from home food, I don't know... Other than that, I was already fresh, because I had a shower and put some better clothes, as it was thanksgiving night and I was waiting for dad. Well, actually, as hope faded, concerning to that matter, I thought about just going to my bedroom, but it was thanksgiving.
It was thanksgiving and we had to settle the Christmas tree, I mean, I even had already unpacked everything and left them in the living room. I seems I'd have to do it alone.
I thought about just leaving things there and just go to my bedroom, but mom wouldn't like me to do it, and she always thought me I should be thankful, no matter what.
So, I started hanging the ornaments in the tree. It wasn't a big tree, as we aren't a big family to settle it, even more so now, but it gave me time to think. I wasn't feeling really thankful at first as I missed mom.
But I had other things to be thankful for. Feeling sad didn't mean I didn't feel thankful, besides all the little ornaments were so beautiful. Mom bought all of them for last time we did it together...
Well, I was thinking and mentally saying thank you, as I was alone, about things, like in a small prayer. I was thankful for the amazing year in the football team, I mean, I wasn't the best player, actually I spent most of my football year on the bench, but still it was amazing... for me. I was thankful the old man was hanging on well through this situation... not so well as he wasn't there, to help me with my thanksgiving celebration – if you can call it that – but still he was hanging on and I had him, so I was thankful for dad. I was also thankful for having more possessions than most of people and that I had done so fine during the school year up to now.
I know it was a thanking day but I still was very sad and I included only one request, if I could do that, like at the end of it like `God, I'm thankful for all of this and er... I'm sorry if dad can't be here but I know he means from his heart the same I do, so I'm thanking in his place as well, but I just want to make one request: I want to have someone not to let me be alone in times like these. Thank you.'
Actually I wish I `had' something else to do, but there was nothing else, so I just went to my bedroom.
Playing with my shaft is always a good way to find quick joy. Lately other than dad's `videos' collection, I found new things in the Internet.
I found out that, yes, it's possible that a very hunk masculine man is likely to have sex with another hunk masculine man, can you believe it?!
There are a lot of videos about it and a lot of people write stuff about it, so it's true.
I took my white long-sleeved t-shirt off, it had a very soft fabric, I ran my fingers through my cooper colored hair. I washed and dried if after the shower, as it was – supposed to be – a special day, so it smelled of chamomile. I lightly ran the tip of my fingers on my left nipple and then pressed one peck just to tell myself that the gym days were paying off. But I wasn't strong like the guys in the screen, they were bigger than me.
It seems the guys in the video, they were friends, very close friends, and as they are talking, they start running their hands over the others bodies... at first `just to check' who's the stronger, who works out more, they have these very well developed muscles... and very soon they're kissing and naked.
Wow, I wish I was kissing and naked with one of them. With that, I put my right hand inside my pants and briefs, and it feels so good. In one motion I'm naked too, watching it, rubbing my shaft.
In five minutes, cum erupted in an arch in front of me and landed some on my chest, as I never left my eyes from the screen.
I drifted off looking at the cold night out of the window, wishing my prayer could be answered.