Date: Sun, 22 Jul 2001 15:46:26 +0000 From: David R Briggs Subject: David's Story Chapter 5 Authors note: This is my first attempt at writing a story like this, so please keep that in mind while reading the pages to follow. My grammar is poor by most standards, and i really don't care either. I'm not writing this to impress you with my grammar and syntax. I am writing this however to give you a window into my life and the people I have shared my life with. Now the legal stuff: 1. you are supposed to be 18 to read this. 2. if it is illegal where you are too read this type of story, it is entirely your responsibility to stop right now. 3. This story is not all gratuitus sex but there is sex involving consenting males under the age of 18. Mainly because this story involves the details of my life and I have had my share of sex when I was a teen. 4. If this type of reading material offends you, do not continue! that being said i hav no way of knowing who will read this so enjoy if you will at your own risk 5. Of course this is my story and My intelectual property, but feel free to read copy and distribute it as long as you keep the disclaimer and give credit where and when it is due. David's Story By b-boy1 Chapter 5 I walked Brad home after, what was decidedly the most awsome sex I had ever had. I was still a little high from the sex, but the talk afterwards had me reeling. I usually don't dwell on the act, but it was hot. I had to think. Brad professed feelings for me, that until recently only existed in my fantasies. I made my way back home. Thankfully, dad wasn't home. I would certainly have trouble explaining that goofy grin on my face. I suddenly became aware of the gravity of it all. I was in still in the closet, quite heavily I might add. My dad would kill me if he found out. I didn't even know if I loved Brad. I mean, sure we fooled around, but I thought it would just be a one time thing. Brad had feelings for me. At least he said he did. This was happening all too quick for me. I regretted having gone that far with Brad. I think I should have stopped it, but that would have ruined our friendship. He would have thought I was freaking out on him. Being a gay teen is hard enough to deal with. It's not like a herero situation. The guy or the girl are able to stop it and there is almost a no harm no foul clause. For gay people, the results can range from a rejection to, I shuuder to think how bad it could be. I had to ask myself some questions about this whole situation. Do I regret what we did? To be entirely honest with myself,no. Would I do it again? Hell yes. Do I want some kind of relationship with Brad? I was stuck with that question for a while. My mind was racing with thoughts. I kept comming back to the same painful of it all. I would be risking everything if I did. I was still battling the demons of my childhood. The fear of rejection. The fear of being taunted for the rest of my life. The fear that I would lose my relationship with my father. I sat on my bed with my knees drwn up to my chest. I had all of these emotions running around in my head. I was trying to deal with them seperately but, They kept rushing at me all at once. I was beginning to think I was worse off than I thought. I thought back to what I told Brad. I was honest with him. I told him I wanted to take things slowly. I do like him but love is a big step for me right now. Sure, the idea is wolderful. Who doesn't dream of being in love. I knew my history well enough to know I would most likely be uprooted again. I wasn't sure I could give my heart to somebody then lose it all in the blink of an eye. I was till in shock from the events of the recent past. I was so confused. I decided to talk to Brad and discuss this with him. I want us to be more than just friends. I really do. I dont want my heart broken, more importantly, I don't want to break his heart. I need to sleep on this. I will look at this with a clear head. I was too filled with emotions to even try. I drifted off to sleep around midnight. I slept fitfully that night. I woke up screaming around four in the morning. I was terrified. I was shaking so badly I could barely breath. My dad came into my room ready to repell whatever had me screaming. He looked around the room carefully, before looking at me. Dad rushed over to me held me in his arms like when I was little. I was still shaking. I couldn't even remember the dream. If it was so bad, my sub-conconcious wouldn't let me remember it, I don't think I want to know. I knew I was safe, because dad was there, I just couldn't get past that terrified feeling. I knew my father was there. He was saying something, but I couldn't here him. I was like he was off on the didtance calling to me. I don't know how long I was there like that. I noticed the sun shining through my window some time later. I looked over at my clock, it was 11:30. My father was still there. He was propped up in the corner of my bed quietly sleeping. I got up and went to the bathroom. I came back into the room and sat down on the edge of my bed. My father woke with a start. I turned and rested my hand on his arm. He looked at me and relaxed. Dad said " Are you ok?" I said " I had a nightmare I guess. I can't remember it though. It's almost as if it is too frightening to remember." Dad said " You woke up screaming. I ran in here thinking you were being attacked. When I got in here you were sweating buckets. You were shaking so badly, I thought you were going to come unglued. I tried speaking to you. You had a blank stare on your face like you weren't in there. I'm worried about you David. You really havn't talked about what happened in the park. I think you havn't dealt with it. If you want to see someone, just say the word." There was genuine concern in my father's eyes. I got a little scared when he told me how I looked. I havn't ever had dreams like this. I looked at dad and said " You know, I really havn't dealt with it. I haven't even talked with my friends about it. I always seem to change the subject. Maybe this is how it's all catching up with me. I don't think I could handle another night like that. Dad said " I'll make some calls for you. Your doctor said this might happen. I have to go into the office for a while today. I really don't want to leave you alone today. Why don't you come in with me." I didn't want to go, but I figured it would give us some time together. Dad has been working a lot lately. I had barely seen him since we moved here. This might just be a good time for us to catch up. I said " Are you sure I wont be in the way? I know you've been busy the past few weeks. I just...." He cut me off. Dad said " You are never in my way. You are all I have left." Tears were welling up in his eyes. My dad pulled me into a tight hug. I had to tap him on the back. " Dad.. Dad.. too tight...can't breath. He let me go and looked at me. He said " Come on now.. get dressed. I'll buy you a late brakfast." As I was getting ready to go, i heard dad on the phone talking to someone. He said "...I don't care what it takes, just have security get a pass ready for him. He's my son and he needs me. I won't leave him alone today Chuck. You didn't see the look in his eyes. He was scared whitless. (pause) OK. Thanks Chuck. I owe you one." I finished dressing and went downstairs. Dad was still getting ready, so I called Brad to let him know I wouldn't be around today. We were supposed to hang out today. I called him. " Hello " " Um.. is Brad there?" " Just a minute " I heard someone calling Brad. "Hello" " Hi Brad" "David?" "Yeah" "Oh hey dude. You ready to go over to Aarons?" " Um Brad. Actually, that's why I'm calling. This whole thing with the attack is bugging me a bit more than I thought. I had a pretty rough night. My dad is in parent mode today. He wants me to go into work with him" " David, what happened? Are you ok?" " I had a bad bream, but it really freaked me out. I just couldn't stop shaking." " David, call me when you get home. Please" " How could I resist. You're my best friend" Brad was crying "David, are we ok?" "Brad, we went through this yesterday." "I know we did. Sometimes things change overnight." "I told you that I was ok with it. That's what I meant. I don't go off changing my mind overnight." "I'm just worried Dave." "Whell don't. I don't say anything unless I mean it. Look, I have to to this thing with my dad today. I have barely seen him since we moved here. Come over tonight and we'll spend some time together. See if you can stay the night and let me know when you come over. Ok? "OK" "I gotta run" "bye Dave" "bye Brad" Dad was comming downstairs as I hung up. He said " Who was that?" I said " I called Brad to let him know I wasn't going to be around today." Dad said " Oh. That's the kid from down the street right?" I said " Yeah. He's pretty cool. We've been hanging out. He 's gonna be going to the same school." Dad said " Whell, lets get going." We got out to the car, and got in. We were pretty quiet till we were on the expressway. I said " Dad, I don't want you to get into trouble for bringing me into work with you." Dad looked at me then looked back at the road. He smiled and said " You're not going to get me into trouble. Where woul you get an idea like.... Oh, you heard me on the phone didn't you?" I said " yeah." Dad said " They are just a little tight about security right now. We're almost ready to introduce a new product. They get a little paranoid every time we do it. We're not going onto the production floor, so there's nothing to worry about." I said " What do you have to do today?" He said " We had to fire our tech support guy. He was drinking on the job. So, I'm stuck putting together computers for a new team comming in next week. I almost regret putting my computer knowledge on my resume." I said " Um dad, Have you forgotten that I just happen to be skilled in that particular area?" He said " Dave, It wouldn't want to bother you with this. You have enough to worry about without having to deal with my workload." I said " Aw come on dad. We can get this don in half the time. Besides, it would keep my mind off all the crap that's bugging me." I whined at huim when I spoke. He had no chance. It was his weakness. All I had to was whine, and he was helpless to resist. Dad agreed. We worked on the systems and got all of them done in about two hours. We packed up the systems and put them on a cart. Dad took them down to the computer lab to have the software loaded onto them. He came back up and we left. We went and had lunch afterwards. It was like old times. I had fun just hanging out with my father. Most teens don't like their parents for some reason. My dad was cool. He even liked the same music as me. We did some shopping and bought a lot of stuff for school. We talked about the swim team. I told him I wanted to try out for it. He thought that might be a good idea. We got back to the house a short while later. We weren't home ten minutes before the phone rang. Dad answered it. Whoever he was talking to got him really pissed off. He hung up and went into the den for a while. Dad came out a little while later obviously upset. He said " Dave, I have to...." I cut him off " You have to go out of town again huh? Whell, at least we had today. I had fun, and I got to see where you work." He said " I'm sorry about this. I don't really have a choice in the matter. It might seem like a simple decision to you, but we just bought this house. I can't afford to quit right now." I said " Dad, it's ok. I understand that you have to do what it takes to support us. Do I like it that you have to travel all the time for work? Yes and no. No, because we can't hang out together. Most kids don't get along with their parents. All we have is each other, so it is just natural that we are friends as well as father and son. I do like it when you travel, because it gives me the chance to see what it's like to live on my own. Besides, I get to throw all kinds of wild parties." I laughed at that last statement. Dad said " I just don't feel right leaving you here right now." I said " Dad, I have some pretty great friends. We all seem to have our own problems, but we seem to have what the other is missing. I will have plenty to keep me occupied while you are gone. I don't want to sound like the parent here but, where are you going and how long will you be gone?" He laughed and said " I guess you do sound like a parent. It's nothing all that glamerous. I'm just going to India for a month." He smiled. I puched him in the arm. I said " Just India huh? Dad said " I'd take you with me, but you have school starting in a few weeks. I'll leave you a credit card like before, and I'll make arrangements for food and stuff for you. I already signed permission slips for drivers ED if you decide to take it. I'm going to leave my cell phone here. Use it as you wish, just don't run my bill up. I'm flying out tomorrow night. Is there anything you need before to have for school or around the house before I go?" I said " I have some cash but, my reserve fund is low. I bought some programs for my computer. I have about a hundred bucks left. If I'm careful, I coud get by for two weeks using the card where I can. I don't likke the idea of using that caed though." Dad said " Just go to an ATM when you need money. It doesn't matter to me. Just have someone with you when you do it. Do Not Go Alone. Think about your safety." I said " Dad, the last thing I want to do is get hurt again. I'll get Brad's mom to take me. She's a regular June Cleaver." Dad laughed at that. He said " You know, I really haven't met your friends. I've only seen them long enough to watch you head out the door with them. Why don't you invite them over for dinner. We'll do pizza or something." I said " I'll see if they can. While you are at it, it wouldn't hurt to make some friends here too. I know you're busy, but you need to." Dad smiled and walked back into the den. I called Brad and Aaron to see if they could come over. Aaron almost couldn't come over until I told his dad that my dad wanted to know that my friends were ok before he left for his trip. I guess he understood all about that. I told him that dad had to go away on business and was really overprotective since my attack. He asked to speak to my dad for a minute. I told dad to pick up the phone and talk to Aaron's dad for a minute. They were still on the phone when Brad and Aaron got there. Aaron had to go to the bathroom and excused himself. Brad waited till he was in the bathroom and looked around. He walked yp to me and gave a kiss. It was slow and passionate. We almost didn't hear Aaron comming back from the bathroom. We broke our kiss just in time. We tried to act like nothing happened. Aaron said " What are you two up to? You two are acting guilty." I said " Dude, it's all in your head." Aaron started to say something, but dad came out of the den. He turned to look at dad and back at us. He got this weird look on his face then smiled. Aaron said " Hi Mr. O'leary. Nice to see you again. No need to worry about Dave-o here. He has some real good friends. Some better than others." He turned to look at Brad and I and winked. I was a little more than scared now. Brad had a panicked look on his face too. Dad spoke up next. He said " So guys, What do you feel like for dinner? There's pizza, Chinese, or you can be adventerous and try Indian. I figured I'd throw that one in there, because the food is good, and it is something a little different." I said " Dad is just trying to rub in the fact that he is going to India for a month on his company. Don't let him influence you. Just get whatever you want." Brad said " I'd be willing to try it if you guys will." Aaron said " I've had it before. It's pretty good stuff. I even know a place that delivers." I said " Oh, all right then. I'm game. You'll have to help me pick something out Aaron. The hotter the better." Aaron called the restaraunt and had them fax a menu to the house. We looked it over, and decided on what to get. We decided to just hang out and talk while we waited for the food. Dad went over to the stereo and turned it on. The guys looked at him oddly when he settled on a station. He chose the local modern rock station. Aaron said " You don't have to put that on just because we're here." It was my turn to laugh. I said " He's not doing it to humor us Aaron. That is his favorite station. If you don't believe me go out to the jag and check the presets on the radio." Aaron said " You actually like this?" Dad said " whell, I don't really care for 'green day', I'm more of a crystal method and creed fan." He smiled as the guys looked wide eyed at him. We all talked about music and bands. They were surprised to find an adult that actually liked the same music as us. I went into the kitchen to get us all something to drink. I came back into the livingroom to find dad in full parent mode. He was asking the usual parent questions for meeting the friends of his son. I said " Dad, they were thinking you were somewhat cool until you started with the dad stuff." Dad said " Dave, I'm willing to risk being uncool if it means I get to know that my sone is safe while I'm away." I put a hand on his shoulder and said " I know dad, you have to do your job as a parent." Brad said " He's still cool dave. My parents would never listen to my music, let alone discuss it with my friends. I think your dad is more than a parent. He asked us questions like a friend does. Parents don't do that, friends do though." At that point, I don't think I could have been more proud of my dad. I was standing behind Brad and Aaron and mouthed 'Thank you dad'. He nodded and changed the subject. He asked all kinds of questions about school and what kind of sports they were into. We talked about swimming and possibly gymnastics. The food came and we talked more during dinner. The food was fantastic. I had a vegetarian dish with tofu. It tasted very good but, boy was it ever hot. Aaron laughed when I took the first bite. He was a little surprised at my reaction. He ordered it very spicy as a joke, but found out that it was just how I like it. After dinner, dad excused himself saying he had to pack for his trip. We all went up to my room after cleaning up the dishes. I put my leftovers in the fridge for a late-nite snack later. Once we were in my room, it got quiet for a few minutes. I was thinking about what Aaron said earlier. Aaron notice I was quiet. I couldn't look him in the eye. He picked up on that too. He said " Dude, I didn't mean to freak you out earlier, but I see there is something bugging you guys, and it will only get worse till you talk about it." I said " There is nothing bugging me. Just drop it." There was a little more hostility than I wanted in my voice. I looked at brad an he shrugged his shoulders. I said " Aaron I have to talk to Brad for a minute. Just stay here for a minute and we'll be right back. Brad followed me out of the room and down into the laundry room. I said " Brad, I think he saw us or at least knows something is going on. He will continue to bug us about it until either we tell him or he finds out. I don't know about you, but I would rather be honest with him." Brad said " He comes from a pretty liberal family. He would probably understand. As far as suspecting is concerned, I think he saw us. He came down the stairs pretty heavily when he came back from the bathroom. Aaron never walks heavily. He's too quiet a guy for that. I think he saw us and wanted to avoid an awkward moment. Why don't we just play it by ear. Either of us can tell him. Lets just go back up and talk to him and see what he knows." We walked back to my room to find Aaron just sitting out there looking out the window. I called out to him and he wouldn't turn around. I walked over and touched him on the shoulder. I saw that he had tears in his eyes. I said " Aaron, Brad and I need to talk to you." He turned around and you could see that there was pain in his eyes. Aaron said " I know." I said " Waht do you know." He said " I saw you two when I was comming back from the bathroom." I sat down and put my head in my hands. I said " We didn't mean for you to find out like that. I just happened and there is no way to change it. However, I do want to know what you intend to do with your knowledge of this." Aaron said " Don't worry, your secret, if that's what you want it to be, is safe with me. I am mad though. No, mad isn't the word here. Hurt is a much better word. I'm hurt that you didn't TRUST me enough to tell me. Especially tou Brad. Yuo of all people should know better. I expected it form David, because he doesn't know me that well, but you." Aaron was openly sobbing now. This was a side of him that I naver saw. I didn't think he could be that sensitive. He was truly hurt that we didn't trust him enough to tell him about ourselves. Brad spoke up " Aaron, I didn't tell you, because I didn't think it was important enough. It is such a small part of who I am. I also didn't know how you would react. Yuo may think it's an easy thing to do, but it is the hardest thing in the world to do. I have tried a million times to tell you and chickened out at the last minute. I never intended to hurt you or decieve you. Yes. Yes I am gay. I didn't want to be. I just am. It's tough being gay and a teenager too. Take a look at the news sometime dude. A bunch of guys in montana beat the shit out of a kid and left him in the middle of nowhere to die. If you were me, you would hide too. I don't want that to happen to me too. You try living with that rattling around in your head for a few years. Then tell me of you would have done the same thing." Brad was leaning up against the wall. He just slid down the wall. He sat there on the floor with his knees touching his chest. He looked like he was drained. I was watching Brad the entire time he spole. I turned to look at Aaron. He was just standing there like he was in a daze. Aaron walked over to me and looked me right in the eye. I was a little nervous. I can normally read a person's emotions by looking in their eyes. I couldn't tell with Aaron this time. Aaron said " You. Are you?" I nodded " How did you guys find out? About each other anyway." He still had the same look in his eye. I said " Aaron, I am going to spare you some details which are private. Brad came to me. He told me about his feelings for me. He took a big risk in telling me. I have feelings for Brad. I don't want to offend you, but those feelings are also private. If you really want to know, you will need brad's permission for me to talk about it." Aaronlooked over his shoulder at Brad. Brad nodded I took a breath and said " Aaron, I care very much for Brad. I may even love him. The last thing either of us meant to do is cause you any pain. Our parents don't even know. We wanted to sort out all the things rattling around in out heads first. We only just found out about each other a couple days ago." Aaron looked at me intensly. He seemed to be trying to red me. He said " I have known Brad a lot longer than I have known you. I don't care as long as you don't make a pass at me or anything. As far as you and Brad are concerned, I will say one thing to you an leave it at that. If you EVER hut him, I will end you. I will punch your fucking lungs out. You got that?" I nodded. Aaron stepped back to look at me for a minute. He said " Do I get a hug now?" Aaron opened his arms for an embrace. I hugged him. He turned to Brad and pulled him up to do the same thing. I felt better that things turned out ok. I was still scared that somebody knew. I'm going to leave it there for now. I have chapter six don and will send it when I can. I'm having some trouble with my health lately. My doctor told me to rest and relax for a while. I'm doing just that. I have a feeling I'll be spending a lot of time just sitting by the pool. I'll get some writing done. Comments dbriggs10@juno.com