Date: Fri, 2 Jul 2010 11:10:55 -0700 (PDT) From: Kevin Carson Subject: Drummer Boys - Part 48 Drummer Boys By Kevin Carson Hi, I'm Kevin and this story is about my relationship with my more-than-a-friend and, well, much, much more-than-a-jack-off buddy. Yes, it includes gay teen sex stuff. Lots of it! It's based on true experiences but some of the names and places have been changed for privacy. Hey, if this is illegal where you're at or if you're too young to be reading this, then you better not. Getting in trouble isn't cool... believe me, I know... based on true experiences! All rights reserved. No reproductions permitted without prior permission from me, Kevin. I'm the only one. Copyright 2010. I would like to express my sincere thanks and heartfelt gratitude to everyone who has written to me about this story. I really appreciate your comments, feedback and questions. My email is: kc.drummerboy@yahoo.com. Sincerely, -kevin. Part 48. When Ms. Kirsch said she had to talk to me about "an important school matter," I almost jumped out of my skin. Wouldn't that be a sight to see, being that my skin and my damn-tight clothes were almost one-in-the-same??!! Mark, apparently, decided it would be best if he didn't participate in the conversation that was about to unfold. He didn't totally disappear, though... he just sat back on the couch and put his earbuds in, humming along as he listened to "Free Fallin'", one of his all-time favorite songs. It's one of my favorites, too, for that matter! And with all it's references to Los Angeles, California, and some other important things, it has an even more special meaning to me now. I think he was trying to be polite by pretending he wasn't listening to us talking. But, me?? Well, maybe I was jumping to conclusions, but I automatically thought I fucked up again... that I had done something wrong. Am I paranoid, or just programmed to think that way?? Trust me. When I tell you I can't handle much more, I really mean it. Is there ever going to be a day when I'm not blind-sided by yet another surprise? I felt like I was the one who was "free falling out into nothing." Many thoughts raced through my mind in a matter of seconds... the first being that maybe Emily DeMarco started some phony shit about me again. There was no one around when she came up to me the other day at school when I was waiting for Mark. What if she wasn't sincere about putting our differences behind us and wanting to become friends? She could make up another bullshit story about me and the trouble would start all over again. I think I knew Emily really had changed, but you can understand why I was still on guard, right? The train wreck with her last fall lasted the whole damn school year, so I think when I'm up against a wall, the doubts I have about her will naturally come back. Ms. Kirsch broke my momentary drift of thought. "No, no, no, Kevin! You're not in trouble! Not at all!!" she continued. "I fully meant to talk to you today when you were at band practice, but by the time I was free, you were already gone. Anyway, what I want to tell you is that I am going to be the advisor for the Conflict Resolution Team this year." "What? Really??" I wondered. "You mean, Mr. Hartman isn't doing it anymore?" Dad asked. He, too, was a bit surprised. "No, he's not," Ms. Kirsch answered vaguely. "Mr. Davis asked me to oversee it now, and I think it will be exciting to help students work out their differences." "So what's that got to do with me??" I inquired. "Well, you were highly recommended as someone who would be a good student representative on the team!" I thought Mark was paying more attention to the "vampires walking through the Valley" in the Tom Petty song than to what Ms. Kirsch was saying. But... being quite the multi-tasker that he is, he couldn't help himself... "That's awesome, swee -- I mean -- Kevin!" Mark interjected. Then he cleared his throat and looked away, grinning. Haha, he started to call me "sweetie" in front of Dad and Ms. Kirsch, but caught himself. Thank God!! I bet he was looking at my crotch again, too! "Wow! Me?? You've got to be kidding!!" I chuckled. "Someone thought of ME???" "Yes, YOU!! We need someone who can be fair and impartial... a good listener who can help mediate when two students have a dispute or disagreement," Ms. Kirsch added. "So what do you say? Are you interested?" "I guess, maybe... but... Dad, are you sure you didn't know anything about this??" "Nope! This is the first I'm hearing about it, Kev." "Just out of curiosity, Ms. Kirsch... who recommended me?" She hesitated slightly, then smiled at all of us. "Actually, Kevin, it was Mr. Hartman who mentioned your name. He spoke very highly of you." "OK, is this a joke? That dude is DEFINITELY on crack or something," I laughed. I suppose that was sorta rude of me to say that. Mark snickered, too. "Look, I'm sorry, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but, you know, he was really unfair to me last year. That was a pretty rough time." Talk about vampires... Emily and Mr. Hartman were the real vampires, because they sure sucked the lifeblood out of me last fall. "I understand how you feel, Kevin, believe me. But Mr. Hartman also told me that, whether you were right or wrong, he could tell you're persistent at seeking the truth and that you try very hard to get to a workable solution. And, he was impressed that you had so many people backing you up." Fuck! How could I feel so hot and sexy -- horny for Mark, actually -- yet, at the same time, get caught up in the memories of the Emily fiasco? And yes, there were a lot of people on my side when all that shit went down with her: Dad, Mark, Keith, Townsend, Nora... and my dear old buddy Arlo Levinson! He's the one who saved my ass most of all. He didn't have to make that phone call to Mr. Hartman to vouch for me. He didn't have to, and he wasn't going to at first, remember? But he did, thank God. "I just don't know about this, Ms. Kirsch. I need to think about it. Can I get back to you?" I was positive and polite, but assertive. Sorta like my Dad! "Sure. Talk it over. Give it some thought and come see me Monday. Alright?" That conversation was sorta weird... probably more so because of my reaction, not because of what Ms. Kirsch had to say. But, this time around, I say I was justified. Even if that old fucker Mr. Hartman had this big epiphany that I'm some kind of teenage peacekeeper, it's a little too late. Where the fuck was his famous "Conflict Resolution Team" last fall when I needed it? Nowhere! No one was there to "listen and mediate" for me!! I ended up in Hartman's office and got fucked over. Everyone knows that, including Ms. Kirsch. So there! And one more thing... actually, I don't blame Ms. Kirsch, but honestly, I wish she had kept school matters at school. Even though she meant well, I hoped that was the end of the conversation, and that she and Dad would not discuss it any further. I gave him a non-verbal "we-need-to-talk-in-private" kind-of look, and I think he understood. In a split second I got my emotions together, which I'd had to do more than once that week. No one could tell I had a brief "Kevin moment," but I was still sorta taken aback. I realize the stuff with Emily and Mr. Hartman was all in the past, and one look at Mark looking at me certainly got me focused back on the present! As we said goodbye to my father and Ms. Kirsch, we reminded them it was OK with us if they stayed out as long as they wanted. The later the better! It's not like they needed our permission, but we gave it to them anyway. As they were walking out the door, Dad had a little fun teasing Mark. "You know, kiddo, the Stevie Nicks version of "Free Fallin'" is a lot better than Tom Petty's," he laughed. Mark flashed that big toothy grin of his. "Well, Mr. C., that's debatable! I say the original is the best!" "Oh, you boys and your music!" Ms. Kirsch chimed in, shaking her head with a smile. "You two have fun tonight!" "Oh, don't worry Ms. Kirsch! We will!!" And as soon as they drove away, Mark and I bolted up to my room for a long-awaited little "quickie" before we went out. I swear we both took the steps two at a time, side by side, to get the fun underway as fast as we could!!! Shoes, jeans, shirts and underwear were flying in a matter of seconds and we jumped on my bed. Oh God, it was the best ever. Close your eyes and imagine what we did! "You were hard when we were downstairs in the family room talking to my Dad and Ms. Kirsch, weren't you?" I teased Mark. "OK, so I was," he admitted! "Do you think they noticed??" "Jeez, Mark, I doubt it, since you were sitting down most of the time, with your hands across your lap. Plus, I don't think Ms. Kirsch or my Dad go around wondering if we're aroused or not." "You're right, sweetie... only you do that!!" "Oh, you fucker! I don't have to wonder about it! It's a fact we both get random boners all day long, so it's nothing new you had one at that particular moment," I giggled. "Besides, I saw YOU checking me out... SEVERAL TIMES!!! Your eyes were like glued to my..." "God, can you blame me, Kev??? I mean, those skinny-ass jeans are like, sooo painted on you. I swear I could see the outline of your dick!" "Oh! Come! On! You canNOT see that!" (Can you???) "It's your imagination!!" I laughed. Then I French-kissed him. And you know what else I did? In a manner of speaking, I was Mark's little "vampire," but it wasn't his blood I was sucking! I got him fully hard again by playing with his balls and giving extra-special treatment to the head of his cock. Yes, sir, I gave that big pink mushroom quite a few swirls with my tongue, and was extra generous with my spit as I licked my way up and down his shaft. And to make matters better, I licked my middle finger too, and worked it around his hot hole. I almost plunged it in a few times but I didn't. That drove him nuts. "Ohhh... That feels so good sweetie. Stick it in! Stick it in!! STICK IT IN!!! I didn't "stick it in" but I did continue to suck him and jack him until he fired quite a massive load on his tummy. I admit I gasped when his big wet rod started to pulse in my hand. My eyes were fixated on all that hot cream shooting out of that sweet cock of his, and that got ME harder than ever. I started to dribble quite a string of precum myself! Without even stopping to take a breath, we reversed positions. I was on my back, legs up, and Mark had full access to my dick, balls and butthole. And he went to town!! Licking, sucking, jacking, bobbing up and down... all working me into a frenzy. It didn't take very long until I screamed and shot five big spurts of slightly watery cream all over the place. The third one went past my belly button, which is pretty far for me. I lifted my head up to watch the show and could feel my hole and stomach muscles tighten and as I exploded. We were on a roll, and Mark wanted to cum again, but I just kept playing with him... bringing him to the edge, then stopping. He's done that to me before, and I was determined to make him wait until later that night to have another jizzfest. Payback's a bitch, isn't it??!! But... Since we fooled around a little, and were both a wee bit messy, we had some cleaning up to do. Although it hadn't been very long since Mark and I showered, we got under the spray together to quickly rinse off again. We had to make extra sure we were presentable, you know! I mean, it's not like we were covered with gobs of cum or anything. Haha... just a little! "I wanna watch you put those Levi's on again, sweetie." "Oh God, Mark. Make up your mind. Do you wanna watch me put them on or take them off??!!" "Both! I wanna watch you do both!" OK, so in Mark's eyes I'm a sex God. I can't help it! (Alright, I'm just kidding about that. Haha, HE is the sex God, not me!!!) I slapped him on the ass and we left to go to Chipotle to meet up with our little gang of friends. On the way, Mark really cranked up "Free Fallin'" in the Jeep. It's like he couldn't get enough of it! We both sang along until our ears hurt as it blasted through the speakers... but then my phone buzzed. It was Matt. "Yo, it's good, dude. We're on our way, so chill!" I answered. "Whatever... it's all good! But, Kev, I really gotta tell you something!!!" Matty sounded really uber-excited. He was flying high, even by my standards. "What's going on??" "Nick's coming back here for Christmas break, Kev! He's coming back!! I'll get to see him again!!! That's what he was teasing me about!!!! He finally told me!!!!! This is soooo awesome!!!!!! He's coming back!!!!!!!" "Matty -- SLOW DOWN!! Please tell me you're not driving right now." Damn, the dude was sooo hyper! "No, no, Scott drove, and we're already here at Chipotle. I'm out in the parking lot. Nick just texted me, like two seconds ago, and you're the first person I told. I didn't even tell my brother yet, and we usually tell each other everything. But he might not understand why I feel the way I feel, Kev." "Hold that thought, bud. We're pulling in right now." So, get this: Like I said before, when things start to happen, they happen fast. And all at once. Mark pulled into the lot, which Chipotle shares with Starbucks, but anyway, Matt was there pacing back and forth, unable to hide his excitement more than ever. I swear, that kid has done a total 180 from when we were at Fire Island and he almost-flatlined. But guess what!?! There was someone else in the parking lot I also recognized. It was Chris, the pizza guy! He was walking toward his car and he noticed me, too. I realized right away that Chris and Matt obviously knew each other... "Kramer! How you been, dude?" Chris and Matt bumped fists and were like all "hey, man" and stuff. Then Chris spoke to me: "You're Kevin, right? Remember me? I'm Chris Barnes, the delivery guy from Smarty's. I thought you looked familiar!" "Yeah, Chris... hey!! Whatup??" I introduced Mark to Chris, who I really only knew because of delivering the pizza. Running into him again was sooo... random, I guess, and it sorta made me tingle. I found out later that Chris and Matt know each other because they take guitar lessons from the same teacher. "Are you just hanging out, or what?" I asked. "Nah, just getting off work and picking up some chow. I'm sorta sick of pizza all the time, if you know what I mean." That made us all laugh. "I definitely know what you mean!" "Dude, we oughtta get together... you should hang out with us sometime," Matt said to Chris. "Yeah, man, that'd be cool! Once school starts I won't be working so much." I'm telling you, Chris the pizzaboy is awfully cute. I know I shouldn't be thinking of him that way, but I sure as hell can see why he turned Townsend on. I think we all started to sweat, and it wasn't because of the humidity! Even though I had sorta met Chris a few times before, this was the most I ever really talked to him, and I was impressed he remembered my name. But I could tell he was pretty cool, and since he knows the Kramer boys, I guess we'd soon be adding one more person to our group of friends. I think it would be waaay cool to get to know him more. It's funny how this person knows that person, and someone introduces you to someone else and relationships just kinda develop. Anyway, Chris left and then Amy and Nora finally showed up. Mark went inside with them and caught up with Scott, while Matt and I stayed outside for a few more minutes. "Small world, man. I can't believe you know Chris. I've only seen him a few times delivering for Smarty's. I can't believe I've never run into him at school... "Oh, that's because he's a senior at Locust Valley. In fact, I think he's supposed to graduate early." "Hmm... Gotcha. Well... what's his deal, Matt? Is he...?" (I stopped short of saying, "Is he... like us?" But Matt knew what I meant.) "I don't know, Kev. He's got a girlfriend who's a little bit older than him, and she'll be a freshman at Stony Brook. So... you know... I don't know..." Matt kind-of drifted off and looked away, still with a smile on his face. It was like he didn't want to really talk about Chris, or anyone else, as a matter of fact... except Nick. "Matty! Look at me, dude! Look at me!! What the fuck??" "Shit, Kev. Sorry, but I can't get Nick off of my mind. I'm so pumped that he's coming back!" he smiled. "I don't know why I'm feeling this way. I don't know whatever made you want to introduce us to each other, but I'm sure glad you did." "I don't know, Matt. I did it... just... because. Now, come on... you're acting like I did when I first met Mark... a year ago! It's all good." We went inside Chipotle and ordered. It was great, as always, seeing Nora and Amy. Brigette stopped in, too. After we were full of chips and salsa, burritos, barbacoas and whatever else -- as if that wasn't enough -- the guys all wanted to go get ice cream. The girls didn't, though, insisting they'd get fat if they even looked at ice cream. Scott was being Scott... super confident, but cool as hell. He's 'in charge' but not too controlling. You automatically want to do what he says. Amy was a real sweetheart, one of the good girls. I swear she's gotten better looking over the summer, even though I never really paid that much attention before. Obviously Matt was happier than anyone on the planet. While we were eating, he announced to everyone else what he had told me only moments earlier -- that Nick will be visiting again, in December. Everybody thought that was awesome, but no one asked why Matt was so thrilled about it. I guess there was no question... And, you know, about Nora... actually, she might be a little bit thinner than me, so some ice cream might do her good. With whipped cream and a cherry!! She's definitely a good girl, too, and I admit I do sorta have a little thing for her in my heart. I caught her looking at me in my skinny jeans, checking me out head to toe, just like Mark did. She didn't say anything about them specifically, but she had a huge grin on her face. I don't know if she thought maybe I looked alright, or if she was only teasing me, or what the hell was going on. Whatever she meant, I could feel a rush of blood to my face. I was a little overwhelmed, I'd say. "Nice shirt, Kev! You're so metro." "Haha, yeah..." My blushing made me pause for a second. "So, umm... I thought you were gonna say something else. But, umm... yeah, my shirt... it's Hollister! I knew you'd like it! And it's blue... uhh... light blue... umm, and see, it matches my Chuck's..." I was nervous, but secretly happy. "Yeah, bud, well you're definitely all dressed up..." "And ready to play!" "Oh you're so bad!" she whispered, all in fun. "Thanks, Nora." I said, raising my eyebrows and smiling back. "I guess you're right. Maybe I am bad." For a second or two, I thought she was sorta trying to hit on me a little?? Nah... Do you think so??? Then I started to daydream about something kind-of familiar to me. The thought of Nora and me "together" briefly entered my mind. It wasn't the first time that happened, and it wouldn't be the last time, either. I've had these visions many times of her and me far off in the future. Where and when, I don't know. And I don't know what it all means. Sometimes, I can't see her face. I think she's still there, but I don't know for sure. It's sorta dim... But then, through the darkness I see someone else, too. Clearly I can see it's Mark, and we're together, too, side by side. I definitely see that. And he and I are in a place I want to be. I do know one thing for sure: Nora's a good girl. I don't want to disappoint her, and I don't want to be disappointed either. But there might not be a choice. God help me. Yes, it's symbolic, I know. Maybe I need a book of dreams to tell me what it's all about. Maybe it's all written in a song... As our night continued, we never really ended up hanging out at anyone's house or doing anything special. Instead, we went from place to place all over town, bumping into a few other people we knew along the way, and enjoying yet another almost-end-of-summer Friday night. Someone brought up the idea of all of us going to Six Flags Great Adventure over in New Jersey, maybe next Sunday. I acted enthused about it too, but I have to admit, I'm not like the rest of the crowd. Everyone was so damn excited about the roller coasters... how high they are, how fast they go and what that first hill does to your stomach. I dunno... roller coasters really aren't my thing, but maybe that'll change... We laughed sooo much and talked about all kinds of other stuff... like not believing school is almost ready to start, which classes we're taking just because the teachers are so cool, and the ones we'll hate so much. We discussed football and band, and talked about the part-time jobs we want to get, and the ones we'd love to quit. And although we gossiped about other people, like 'who's dating who' and 'who's gonna break up', it was all in fun. Typical behind-your-back stuff. It was sorta like when we were at Fire Island, only with a few less people. And some new ones to think about... and dream about. Eventually that Friday night came to an end, as we all said our goodbyes and "see-ya's." Mark stayed over at my house, as planned, and we got our wish when we got back home: no one was there! Even though it wasn't as hot as it was in the afternoon, it was still sorta muggy, so we turned on the air conditioning. I ran through the entire house closing all the windows, and it didn't take long for things to cool down, in more ways than one. Of course I had Mark all to myself, as I always do, but thoughts of the interactions with our other friends kept creeping into my mind. Actually, we both seemed a little preoccupied. Still, he and I immediately started making out in the family room, in the dark, then eventually moved up to my room. But before we got too carried away and did bad things, we took a short break from the kissing and licking to pee and brush our teeth. Then we got right back to it: Kissing. Touching. Wondering. It wasn't really awkward, but there still seemed to be some tension and hesitation between us. So, we took another little break and sat up on my bed. I put on some music, and when the song "Young Folks" by Peter, Bjorn and John was playing, Mark aggressively tapped out the drum beats on his thighs like they were bongos. We tried to lighten things up with conversation. "I'm really happy the Stewarts are coming back for Christmas," I said. "I know, sweetie. Matt is unbelievably happy. But this is only August. There's a way to go until December. I hope everything will still click with him and Nick by then." "Well Matt seems determined, and according to Allie, Nick can't wait. How much you wanna bet he comes back before Christmas just so they can see each other again?" I added. "I think you're right, Kev. They won't last until Christmas." "I bet they're gonna do what we do!" "Ahhh... I think you're right!!" Mark giggled. "Hey, I also wanted to ask you what you thought of Chris, the guy from Smarty's. I can't believe Matt knows him." "Yeah, I bet he's a cool dude. He seems nice enough." "The first time I sorta met him was last winter over at Townsend's. That was a weird night! You went to that wedding with your parents, remember? And I went to Townie's to watch a movie, and that's when he gave me those stolen shoes and wanted me to stay all night. I swear, Mark, nothing happened. He was too good of a friend to both of us." "I believe you, sweetie. But Townsend was always looking for gold." "Anyway, we ordered a pizza and Chris delivered it. I gotta tell ya, Mark, HE's the one who sorta turned Townsend on that night." "No shit! I think you told me about this before, right?" "Yeah, dude, I dunno. Townie kept talking to Chris like he didn't want him to leave, and that's when he popped this HUGE boner. I mean, it was rather obvious! He had, like, this major tent in his pants! God, I don't even know what the fuck I'm saying!" "Ahh! So YOU were checking out his goods then, huh??" Mark teased. "Shut the fuck up. I couldn't help it!" "Townsend was a hell of a guy, and it doesn't surprise me one bit that Chris or any other hot-looking boy turned him on. Haha, and I'm sure you wow'ed him, too, Kev." "Get out!!! If I did, then you did too!!!" "I'm just kidding, silly, but I definitely think Townie was bi, like almost everyone these days. But he and I never actually talked about that." "I miss that fucker, Mark. I miss him so much. Every time I think of him all I can do is smile!" "Me too, sweetie. That's the way it should be." Then I went seriously silent, and debated if I should talk further to Mark about Townsend. Eventually I decided I would. "Mark, can I ask you something?" "Sure, Kev... you can ask me anything." "Has, um, Townsend ever "talked" to you? Like, do you ever see him? Do you feel he's around us sometimes? Like... his ghost?" "Yeah, Kev, I do. It happens all the time." "Wow. Good. I thought maybe it was only me. I'm glad I'm not crazy." "Uhh... don't be too sure of that, sweetie! I like it when you're crazy." We laughed as we lay across my bed, both of us at that point only in our underwear. Mark was exceptionally sexy in his pair of kelly green AE boxer briefs, which fit him perfectly! I don't know how long we lay there, skin touching skin, talking softly between smooches... fingertips lightly grazing each other's bodies. Then I got a little nervous, one more time. "Mark, can I ask you something else?" "Bring it on, sweetie... I want you to ask me stuff... anything you want." Once again, I hesitated for a second. "Umm... what do you think of Nora?" "Well you know she's darling, and everyone loves her. But..." "But... what?" "Well, she was flirting with you tonight." "Wow, do you really think so?" "Yeah, sweetie, she was. I could tell." "I mean, if she was, was that OK?" "You know, Kev... what can I say? You were flirting back a little bit too." "Wow, yeah, I guess maybe I was," I admitted. The hardest thing to do at that moment was to look at Mark in the eyes. "That was bad of me, I guess. I shouldn't have done that. But I didn't mean anything by it. Honest! I was just having fun, playing along." I didn't wanna say it to Mark, but I, too, knew all along Nora had been flirting with me. And I kinda liked it. "It's OK, bud. It's OK." Even though he said it was "OK," he looked so sad. "I'm really sorry, Mark. I really am. You know I love you." I sorta felt like shit after that, but, as usual, Mark tried to make it seem like it was no big deal. "I know you do, sweetie. I shouldn't be worried." "Trying to piss you off or make you jealous wasn't my intent at all..." "I know." he said softly. I hoped it was all good. Although the moonlight coming through the window gave my room that romantic shade of blue, all we did from that moment on was look at the ceiling, not saying a whole lot more. Yes, we had designs on being all crazy wild that night. But you know what? For some reason, it wasn't to be. The night didn't end with some big sex romp that we were thinking about earlier in the evening. Maybe that was for the best. So we both continued to stare upward, in silence, wondering and worrying about God-knows-what. I kept thinking about the two sets of eyes that had been on me that evening: Mark's and Nora's. I just couldn't get that out of my head. But I also knew that what I thought was a little bit of harmless flirting... could possibly mean I was flirting with disaster. Even though Mark is very understanding and patient with me, I didn't really know what he was thinking. His quietness puzzled me, as I'm sure mine puzzled him, too. I had to figure things out. I realized that if the situation with Nora and me flirting bothered Mark, as unintentional as it may have been, then I better fix it, somehow, and soon. There's too much at risk. I couldn't bear the possibility of losing him just because I like a girl who can turn my head around sometimes. It would be a HUGE mistake if I let that happen... a mistake I could possibly pay for, for the rest of my life. Maybe it was a big deal, but maybe it wasn't. But I also know sometimes even a simple mistake can stop the heart. As we lay there, the "what-if's" started rolling into my head. What if I make more mistakes? Not the kind of mistakes that are so horrible they might keep me from getting into heaven, when it's my time. I do have a couple of people up there rooting for me, you know. But I mean big mistakes. Bigger than just flirting with someone? I thought, what if, in the future, I make some bad decisions? What if I lose my head? What if I lie? What if I cheat? What if I stray? What if I'm tempted? And what would be even worse... what if I act on the temptation? More importantly, I hoped if I ever do any of those terrible things, Mark will forgive me. He'll have to. That's all there is to it. He will, I know it. He will. I might have to go to hell and back, but I'll do whatever it takes to be forgiven. And if he ever makes some mistakes -- and he might -- I will forgive him, too. Without a doubt. No matter what. I looked over at Mark, and through the dim blue glow in my room, his blank stare was slowly changing. He looked peaceful. I kept hearing the song "Free Fallin'" in my head, as I was wondering and worrying about the future. And I had that vision again, of my life, far off in the future. Where and when, I don't know... but things were a little different this time... It was dark, but very clear, and I could only see Mark and me. We were the only ones this time, together, side by side, the way it should be. But it was bittersweet. Just like in the song, he and I were the bad boys standing in the shadows. And the good girls were home with broken hearts. (To be continued...)