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Earth, As it is in Heaven
By:  Roman Genesis

Chapter 19
Life Goes On...?

     Every relationship has that one special moment, that pinnacle that you judge the whole relationship on and come to remember once it's all over.  You say, that was the moment when everything was perfect, and everything that came before and after seemed justified.  That kiss was our moment.  I knew then that he had forgiven me and understood that I would never do anything to hurt him.  I knew he would never have to run away again because what we had was stronger than love.  We connected right there and time nor space could ever keep us apart again.

     "God, I'm so sorry," I said, pulling my lips away from his.  He quickly pulled me back and kissed me harder, if that was possible.  The passion was building and I ran my hands up his arms, kissing him back.  "I love you so much," I said when he finally pulled away.

     "Shannon told me what happened," he said, looking deeper into my eyes than he had ever done before.  "I'm so sorry."  He was once again coming in to kiss me and I let his tongue slip into my mouth when I suddenly remembered his parents.  I pulled back and looked over and saw his mother staring blankly at us.  Shannon was smiling ear to ear, but Mr. Reynolds was looking away.  Eric was no longer even in the room.  I suddenly realized that I had interrupted his little homecoming.

     He followed my gaze over to his parents and his father finally looked at us.  "Trevor, I think you should go now," he said.  I looked at Sebastian and he nodded his head slowly.  Now that I thought about it, Sebastian was probably going to be in big trouble for running away.

     "I'll see you tomorrow," I said.  I took his hand in mine as I moved away and our arms stretched out, tugging desperately to keep us together.  They finally separated though and I went out the front door and into the cold night air.  Shannon followed me out and closed the door behind her.

     "I can't believe it," I said.  "I looked up into the stands and I absolutely couldn't believe what I saw."  Shannon smiled and came over to hug me.  I wrapped my arms tight around her, protecting her from the harsh wind.

     "He said he couldn't stay away.  He couldn't stop thinking about you."  I smiled and squeezed my arms tighter around her.  I couldn't be happier.  I thought that nothing short of a miracle would have brought him back to me, but now here he was.  "He showed up on my doorstep and fell into my arms," she said.  "I finally got him settled down and explained to him everything that had happened.  He knows what happened in the locker room wasn't your fault."

     "Thank you," I whispered.  "Thank you."

     I walked into the locker room the next day and I was absolutely on cloud nine until I saw something that made me stop in my tracks.  Mike was standing outside the locker room and it appeared that he was waiting for me.  I suddenly realized that I hadn't talked to him since our fight the day before.  "Hey Mike," I said slowly.  He looked up at me and for the life of me I couldn't tell what he was thinking.

     "Hey Trevor," he said back.

     "Look, I'm really sorry about yesterday," I started to say.

     "No, it's my fault.  I shouldn't have said those things.  I'm really sorry.  I know you've been going through a lot lately.  I mean, you practically won the game for us and..."

     "Sebastian came back," I said cutting him off.  He looked at me as his look of shock slowly dissolved into one of realization.

     "Thank god," he said smiling ear to ear.  "When did it happen?"

     I smiled back and put my arm around him, leading him inside.  "I'll tell you as we get ready.  I don't need to be late to this class again."  We headed inside and I told him everything that had happened, minus the Chad part of course.  First Sebastian had come back and now Mike and I were coming back to good terms.  Life was really looking up.

     I waited outside Mrs. Anderson's room for Sebastian to show up, but the longer I waited the more concerned I got.  The bell was about to ring and he still wasn't here.  I began to think his punishment for running away was worse than I thought.  All my worrying though was for nothing because finally I saw him coming down the hallway toward me.

     "Hi," he said sheepishly as he stopped in front of me.

     "Hi," I said back, smiling like an idiot.  He leaned over and kissed me right there in the hallway.  As I pulled away I noticed someone coming up behind Sebastian and I froze when I realized who it was.  Chad glanced at me and then looked at Sebastian before going inside the classroom.  I looked at Sebastian to see how he would respond, but he just nodded slightly to Chad as he passed. Chad did not respond.  "We better go inside," I said.

     We walked in and took our seats so Mrs. Anderson could start her lecture.

     I walked into the back cafeteria and quickly went over to Sebastian.  I still hadn't gotten a chance to talk to him since he came back.  I sat down and he looked up and smiled when he saw me.  "Promise me you'll never run away again," I said half joking as I sat down.

     "Promise me you'll never let another guy kiss you," he said back, also half joking.  God, he was driving me crazy.  I hadn't been with him in so long and all I wanted was to go around to the other side of the table and kiss him.  I decided to wait though.

     "Seriously though," I said.  "You can't even imagine how happy I am that you came back.  I was so lost without you."

     "I know.  Shannon told me about what happened in the woods.  I'm so sorry Trevor.  It's just that when I walked into the locker room and saw you and Chad..."  He stopped as if he was once again witnessing the incident.  "I thought it was over."

     I reached over and put my hand on his.  "It will never be over," I said.  "That letter you wrote me... It was incredible.  I'm so happy you were able to share that with me."  He blushed a little and looked down at my hand that was resting on top of his.  He began to kind of look around to see if anyone was staring, but no one seemed to be paying much attention to us, which was definitely a first.  I just sat there staring into his eyes for the longest time as I thought about everything that had happened because of the tiny misunderstanding in the locker room.  His cello was probably beyond repair, but luckily his heart wasn't.  "Are your parents that upset with you?"

     "Oh god, my mom was hysterical when I came in the front door.  My dad just seemed pissed."

     "Are you in trouble?  I mean, do you think I can come over tonight?"

     He smiled as if understanding my hidden meaning.  "I think I can convince them.  I didn't get into to much trouble.  My mom wants me to see some counselor, but there's no way I'm going."  I began to remember Shannon's words to me out in the woods the night he ran away.  We were wrong to think we could help him all by ourselves.  He needs help Trevor.  He needs professional help.  I quickly shook her words from my mind.  It was craziness.

     "Okay," I said.  "I have work tonight, but I'll come over as soon as I get off at eight."  He smiled and turned his hand over so that my palm was resting against his.  "I love you," I whispered.

     I knew that practice was going to be tense because Chad and I hadn't spoken since I left him crying in front of Mrs. Anderson's room, but I had no idea it was going to be this bad.  Chad wouldn't even look at me.  I guess I was secretly hoping he would act like nothing had happened, but that wasn't going to be the case. If he dropped a pass I made to him or if it was just an all around sloppy pass on my part, he still came back to the huddle with nothing to say.  By the end of the night it was really starting to annoy me.

     When practice finally ended I saw that Chad was moving a little quicker than normal to get away from me.  I rushed to get dressed though and was able to dart out of the locker room right after him.  "Chad," I called to him outside the locker room.  He stopped in this tracks, but didn't turn around.

     I came up next to him and found that he was still trying to ignore me, even though he had stopped when I called.  "Hey Chad," I said.  "I think we need to talk about this."

     "I can't.  I have to go," he said.  He began to walk off, but I put my hand on his shoulder and stopped him.

     "We can't go on acting like nothing happened," I said.  "That kiss in the locker room... It shouldn't have happened.  I'm sorry I wasn't able to tell earlier that you..."  I wasn't sure he wanted me to complete that sentence so I let my voice die off.  He was still staring off not looking at me.  "Do you think we can move past this?"

     He finally began shaking his head and it appeared that he was about to cry.  "I'm sorry Trevor," he said.  "I know that you and Sebastian are going out or whatever and I'm sorry if I caused anything.  I don't know what to say."

     "Hey, it's not your fault," I said.  I let my hand linger on his shoulder a little longer than I should have.  I never really noticed how attractive Chad was until it was all too apparent that he had a crush on me.  A strand of his long hair fell from behind his ear and hung down in front of his face.  "I know this is going to be hard to hear, but I think you deserve the truth," I said.  "You're a really wonderful guy Chad, but Sebastian and I are in love."

     He finally brought his eyes to look at me.  "Thanks Trevor," he said.  He reached up and put his hand on top of mine that was still resting on his shoulder.  I looked deep into his eyes and finally had to pull my own eyes away.  There was something terribly seductive about the way he was looking at me and I knew right then that I had to get away before something horrible happened.

     "I'll see you on Monday," I said, pulling my hand away from his.  I walked off down the hallway and turned around before I rounded the corner to see that Chad was still standing where I had left him, his eyes still following me as I disappeared from sight.

     Work was going entirely too slow for me.  I had asked Nancy if I could go home early, but she didn't like the idea at all.  We were pretty busy, but I just wanted to get to Sebastian's house.  I had been thinking about it all day.  I needed to hold him again, just like we used to.  It had only been a few days, but every day without my prince was like an eternity.

     I handed the man his change and he headed for the front door before congratulating on the win the night before.  It seemed that every person who came in knew about our win at districts.  All of it was kind of blowing up my ego though and I was feeling pretty good as the last of the customers were leaving.  I had about fifteen minutes left on my shift and I was looking at my watch every two minutes.  Freedom was approaching second by second...

     The bell chimed letting us know someone was coming in and I turned around to see who it was.  I caught myself when I suddenly realized who it was.  There were three of them, all about my age and they stared at me a little longer than normal as they walked into the store.  I couldn't believe my eyes.  It was a bunch of the guys from Stillwater.  Ryan Fieldmore, their team captain, Bryce Underwood, their safety, and some guy I had never seen before, all coming into the store.  Stillwater was a good half an hour away.  There was no reason for these guys to be here.

     They wandered around the store for a while, glancing over at me every once in a while.  These guys were definitely bad news.  I looked down at my watch and realized I still had ten minutes left in my shift.  I was becoming pretty nervous as they continued making their way around the store, keeping their eyes on me the whole time.  I looked down at my watch.  It had only been a minute.  Everything inside me was telling me to get out of there, but my legs just weren't working.

     I froze as I realized they were coming up to the counter.  None of them had a movie in their hands.  "Hey Ryan," I said nervously as he stepped up.

     "Trevor McClain," he said loudly, staring directly into my eyes.  "I haven't seen you in a while.  How's life treating you?"  Bryce and the other boy stepped up right behind him.  It must have been my imagination, but it seemed that these guys had grown since I last saw them.

     "Pretty well," I said, still acting like their visit was the most natural thing in the whole world.  My voice was shacking like a madman though.  "You know we won our district championship last night."

     "So I heard," he said, grinning like the devil himself.  "We won ours as well as I'm sure you heard.  That means we'll be rivals at State.  That should be interesting."  I smiled nervously, not really sure what to say.  "Maybe it will be a replay of your homecoming game," he said.

     I stood there and chanced a look at my watch.  I still had seven minutes until I could clock out.  I looked at the door to the back room where Nancy was.  The door was closed.  My eyes returned to Ryan and noticed he was still standing there.  "So," I said.  "Can I help you find anything?"

     He studied me for a moment and then said loudly, "Yeah, we're looking for a really gay movie?"

     My heart began to pound in my chest as what he said sunk in.  "A... gay movie?" I stuttered, trying to play it off like I had no idea what he was talking about.

     "Yeah, you know," he said.  "One of those movies with all the ass fucking.  I thought you would be able to help us find one."  He was trying to be as blunt as possible and it was scaring the shit out of me.  These weren't little guys.  His eyes burned straight into mine.  I could see the rage boiling over in him.

     "I don't think I can help you," I was barely able to say.

     He leaned over the counter, coming dangerously close to me.  "I think you can."  I instinctively took a step back and Bryce let out a slight laugh.  "What time do you get off work?" Ryan suddenly said.

     "Not for a while," I said quickly.

     "That's okay," he said back, letting the sarcasm drip heavily from his words.  "We'll wait outside for you."  He signaled to his friends and they all headed for the door before disappearing outside.  My mind instantly began spinning.  My shift ended in only a few minutes and Ryan and his friends were right outside waiting to kick my ass or worse!  This couldn't be happening.  Just when things couldn't get any worse, Nancy stepped out of the back room.

     "Okay, you've been begging me all night," she said.  "I guess you can go now."

     "Actually," I said, my voice still shaking like all hell.  "I was wondering if I could pick up a few more hours tonight."

     "Trevor, you're only fifteen," she said stepping up to me.  "You can't work past eight"  I tried to remember if there was a back way out of here, but I knew there wasn't.  "Go clock out," she said.

     I walked slowly to the back room and clocked out.  I was trapped.  There was no way out of here!  I suddenly had an idea.  I went over to the phone and called Mike.  It rang for a while and each rang brought me closer to panic.  No one was answering!

     I began pacing the back room.  There had to be someone else to call.  I could call Sebastian... No, I quickly told myself.  There's no way I'm bringing him down with me.  I stopped in my tracks and tried to get a hold of myself.  Why was I letting these assholes push me around?  I was Trevor McClain!  Captain of the football team, hero to the whole town.  If I backed down from these guys I didn't know how I could ever look myself in the mirror again.  On the other hand, I might not be able to look in the mirror again if I didn't back down from these guys.

     I made up my mind.  I grabbed my jacket and stepped out into the store and walked quickly to the front door.  It was almost pitch black outside and all I could see was my own reflection in the glass as I got closer and closer.  "Good night Trevor," Nancy said before I pushed the door open to the freezing cold night.  Good night world.