Date: Wed, 21 Jul 2004 00:00:06 -0700 (PDT) From: Jay Winton Subject: erik's song 13 Pish, posh, applesauce. Ugh, god this is all to fimilar. Why does this keep happening to me? Ok! God, I got raped I get it, just once can I stop the blackouts, and just be happy with Erik? I FUCKING HATE MY LIFE, I HATE EVERYTHING, I HATE GOD, HE HATES ME! I can't take this anymore, I need to just...ugh, all I want to do is move away with Erik, be happy, raise a family, get married. CAN ANYONE hear me? SHIT, SHIT, SHIT! Why isn't anyone listening to me? O...god no...please no....SOMEONE LISTEN TO ME! LOOK! I'm TALKING! "Dad? Jay will be ok right?" I asked in a shaky voice. " We don't know yet Erik, the doctor said that we just have to wait for them to digonose the problem" Erik's dad said hugging his only son. " DAD! How do I just sit here and wait? I've been waiting my whole life for love, and you know I have and now I think I found it, and ugh...my life is ruined." Erik said breaking free from his dad and running down the hallway to Jay's room. " Jay, baby listen to me, please. I need you to pull through, I need us to happen, I need to hear you say I love you." Erik confessed through Jay's door. "Erik, come on son, we have to go and let the doctors do what they need do" Erik's dad said, taking his son back to the waiting room." "DAD! No...please...I love him, just let me stay here" Erik cried to his dad. Who was taking him back to the room like a baby having a fit. I was waiting there, in the waiting room, with those stupid kid's not knowing what's going on around them, not knowing that maybe someone might die, or is seriously hurt. Playing their stupid puzzles, and legos. It made me so jealous. How all I wanted at that moment was to be 7 again, and not think about anything except for worms, and dirt. I think a smile crept upon my face when I was thinking this, but was quickly erased when the doctor come in. "Well we have good news and bad news." The doctor started. Ugh, I hate when they do that I said to myself. "Jay isn't badly harmed, but he is in a coma." The doctor contineued. My heart sank so far down in my chest that I didn't even know what to do. "For however long we don't know, we can't determine that right now, but as for his friend's and family, all you guys can do, is pray and be there for him" The doctor finsihed. "Can we go in to see him?" I asked. "well..." The doctor started but I had cut him off "Please, just can I go in?" I pleeded with him. The doctor caved in, and lead me to the room. I walked in, and there was tubes and machines hooked into my baby, and I thought I was going to have a heartattack. "Here you go" the doctor said with a smile, then walked out the door. I was frozen, I had no clue what to do. After awhile of just standing there, breathing in the latex and lubricant smell, I took a small step. Like I didn't want to awake anyone. I took another small step and I could hear my breathing get heavier. I thought to myself, how much this is like sneaking down on christmas morning. I grabbed Jay's hand, and just stood there looking at him, and how peaceful he looked. ERIK! ERIK! ERIK!...o god...someone please hear me, and get me out of here. "Erik?" I heard my dad say as he shook me awake. "What time is it?" I asked as I awoke from my sleep. "It's 10 at night and visiting hours is over" My dad said as he moved to help me up to my feet. I looked around, and then looked at the bed and realized why I was here in the first place. "can I please stay?" I asked my dad. "I don't think- my dad was cut off by the nurse. "I'm sorry, but visiting hours are over" The nurse said as she checked Jay's charts. "Thank you we were just leaving" my dad said as he walked me out the door. "wait, before you go...the information for his family is blank" The nurse said. "would you happen to know who is family is?" The nurse asked my dad. I put my ear to the door so I could listen. "We're his family" my dad said. That's what? Chapter 13...man we're getting heavy in this piece. Well I'm not sure if I should end it, or slow it down and make it longer...I'm at a loss..well I hope u enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it ~Jay~ Feedback: spokenword87@yahoo.com