Date: Sun, 17 Sep 2006 18:51:01 -0700 (PDT) From: James Wade Subject: Face-The-Music 5 This story involves gay teens engaged in sexual behavior. If you're not old enough to be reading this, than don't. These characters are totally fictional, and a total coincidence if you see someone you know in here. Face-The-Music Chapter 5 By Jamie Wade After school let out, I went straight to my car, not looking at anyone till I got to my car. I saw Aaron there waiting for me, so I had to cheer up, or he would of known something was wrong, and I couldn't tell him what happened. I knew right away that he would of told me that we would just have to drop out, but I couldn't do that, we have worked so hard for this. I wanted so bad to beat out Percy and Brittany, I just hated those two so much. The whole ride, I didn't really talk, but every time Aaron made conversation, I tried to keep it going, but I just had too much stuff on my mind. I dropped him off at home, but before he got out, he leaned over, and touched his lips to mine. It was probably the second best kiss I have ever had, the first being the one he gave to me at the beach. We kissed for about a minute, and then he got out. "Cheer up, ok. We are going to beat those two, just you see." I didn't have the heart to tell him that we might not beat them; we might have to drop out. I drove home, and went upstairs to my room, and started playing some really slow, ballad type music, I really needed to think. Music has always been a release for me, it has always been there when I needed to think. I would always seem to find a piece for music that expressed how I was feeling at the moment, that's the good thing about music, there's pretty much a song about everything. I was just getting into this one song, when I heard a knock on my door. "Yeah, who's there?" "Hey cousin, I heard you come in, then I heard your music playing. Is everything ok with you?" "Yeah, I just have a little bit of nerves with this whole singing thing. Plus with Percy and Brittany practically breathing down my neck, waiting for me to screw up isn't helping either." I couldn't tell her the truth, cause she would have told me to just screw them; so what if people found out about Aaron and me. But that one dream that I had kept replaying in my mind, Aaron looked so hurt, I couldn't do that to him, it just wasn't right. "Well, I'm sure you'll do great. It's nothing to worry about, I'm sure of it. Besides, you and Aaron are definitely the best singers there." "Yeah, I guess, thanks." "No problem, come on, me and Rachel are going to go for a run, come with us." "Ok, just let me change my clothes." I got changed, and Tara, Rachel, and me headed out for a little run around our neighborhood. We ran around the block a couple of times, Rachel was really lagging behind, she needed to get into more shape. So Tara and me would have to slow down a couple of times. Then as we were rounding a corner, I saw Percy standing there, watching us. Crap, what the hell did he want now, oh well, guess I have to deal with this. "Hey Tara, I'll catch up with you guys ok, I just need to deal with something." "Ok, just hurry up. Come on Rachel, pick up the speed. Work those legs girl." I ran towards Percy, then stopped right in front of him. "What do you want now Percy?" "I was just wandering what your decision was with the little discussion we had earlier." "Oh, yeah...I've decided to drop out, ok. So now you and Brittany can win that stupid competition." "Well, you've made a smart choice. Awe, look at that your upset. Well just think, now you don't have to worry about your little secret being publicized. Did you tell Aaron about this? Well, by the look on your face, I would say no. Don't worry, I won't tell him a thing, this is just between us. Ok, now you can go have your little run, bye." Man, that guy really pisses me off, and I hate having to drop out, and letting him and Brittany win. That's really the last thing I want, but I want Aaron more, and from that dream I had, I didn't really think I could have Aaron with our relationship public. That would be the worst possible thing, and I couldn't hurt Aaron like that, this was for the best. After our run, we went home, and did a little homework. Then we all went to bed, and I went to bed feeling really stressed. What was I going to tell Aaron tomorrow, how was I going to explain not doing the competition to him. I tossed and turned all night long. I was in the hallway at school, and I saw Aaron coming towards me. He looked happy, which made me happy, then I heard some kid call him fag, and he looked at me with anger in his eyes. He looked hurt, just like before, I couldn't I have done this, I never wanted to hurt him. I tried to reach out to him, but he kept getting further and further away from me. Then he was gone, I had lost him. I awoke to a very bad sweat, I only had one choice, I had to do something about this. I went to school the next morning in the worst mood I have ever had in my life, I wasn't happy at all. I saw Aaron staring at some piece of paper in the lobby, so I went up to him. "What are you staring at?" "Oh, hey, you're never gonna guess what happened?" "No, I don't think I will, why don't you tell me." "LOOK!" I saw on the piece of paper, and it was the results for the singing competition, and I looked to see who had moved on to the next round. I saw under the single competition that Kylie had made the cut, good for her. Then I looked under the couples, and Aaron and me were on it, man I didn't know that we were that good. It made me feel good for a second, then I remembered my little talk with Percy, and I immediately felt bad. "Are you ok?" "What, oh yeah. I'll see you at lunch, I gotta get to class, see you around." I couldn't talk to him right now, not here. I needed a special place to talk to him, I was just dreading our conversation. I mean what the hell was I going to say, nothing I had to say was good news, I just didn't know how he would react to it. Lunch eventually rolled around, and I got a little nervous, I had no idea how I was going to start this conversation. I walked to a little corner where no one could see me, and I tried to work on a starter. "Hey good looking, what's shakin'. No, that's stupid. Hey Aaron, funny weather we're having, hu? Um...Aaron, about those singing results." Nothing I said sounded right, I guess I just had to walk right into it. "You know, if you just say what's on your mind, it will be easier." I turned around and saw that kid from the singing competition, the one who told Percy off. "Um...thanks. Weren't you the guy who told Percy off at the singing competition?" "Yep, that's me. I'm Neil by the way." "Oh, Josh." "Nice to meet you. So what were you practicing for?" "What, oh...um...nothing really, it's not important." "So, do you know Percy or something?" "Or something, I prefer not to talk about it though, he's kind of a pig." "Yeah, so I've noticed." "So, I heard those two guys talking to you before...um..." "Oh yeah, me the big fag, watch out." "No, I mean how can you be so calm about the whole thing. How can you stand people calling you names and stuff." "Well, I just learn to except that there are some people in this world who aren't that open minded, and just can't except the world as it is. Actually, I feel kind of sorry for them, it's a real shame." "I just don't think I could have that much confidence in that. I'd be too afraid of what people might say." "Who cares what people say, just ignore them, and if they get in your face, you get right back in there's." "Yeah, I guess, but I just don't think that I could do that. I mean I don't have that much experience in that type of stuff." "Well, I'd be glad to teach you if you like." "Sure, that would be great." Then I saw Aaron across the cafeteria, and I knew that now was my chance, now or never. "Hey, I'll see yeah later Neil." "Ok, see yeah Josh." I caught Aaron by the arm, and dragged him to an empty classroom, and just started breathing, trying to prepare myself. "Are you ok Josh? You look kind of sick, maybe you should sit down." "I'm fine, listen Aaron, I have something I need to tell you. There really isn't an easy way of saying this." "What, are you like breaking up with me or something?" "Well..." "What! What's going on Josh?" "Listen Aaron, I think that we should just drop out of the singing competition thing, I think that it is the best thing." "WHAT! Are you crazy Josh, that's our only way to get back at Percy and Brittany." "There are other ways." "Like what, please tell me?" "Other ways, we just have to think of some things." "Did Percy threaten you or something?" "No, it has nothing to do with Percy or Brittany, I just don't want to do the singing thing anymore, ok." "Josh, this doesn't make any sense, where is this coming form? Listen, why don't we go do something tonight, I think I can convince your parents that it is some kind of school related activity, and we can talk." "That's the other thing I need to talk to you about." I had to pause for a moment, this was going to hurt like nothing else, but I had to do it. I couldn't let Aaron get hurt, I mean I don't really know if I can trust Brittany with my secret. "Aaron, I don't think going out is such a good idea?" "When, tonight, well then we'll just go out some other night." "NO! I mean any night. I don't think that we should go out at all, and we probably shouldn't see each other again. Trust me it's for the best." Then I walked out, and I could feel my eyes burning, the tears just wanting to come, but I wouldn't. I thought I heard Aaron run after me, but I was too far gone, running myself, and I ran right into the bathroom. Once I got in, I locked the door, and just fell to the floor, crying my eyes out. I was sobbing I was crying so hard. I couldn't even stand, I just sat there on the bathroom floor, crying. I was crying for like 5 minutes, and so hard, that I didn't hear one of the stalls open up, and Neil came walking out and just stared at me. "Are you ok Josh, what happened?" I was still crying too hard to talk, so he knelt down beside me, and just hugged me. After it felt like I got all the stuff out of my system, I started to become myself again. "Now Josh, tell me what happened?" "Well, you see, you know Aaron right?" "Yeah, the new kid, the one you sang that song with, it was awesome by the way." "Thanks, well, I just told him that we couldn't see each other anymore, because I was afraid that he would get hurt." "Hurt, what do you mean?" "Well, you see, Percy and Brittany are doing the singing thing too, and they saw how good we were, so Percy told Brittany about me an Aaron. Then he told me that if I didn't drop out, than Brittany would tell the whole school about me and Aaron." "Man, what an ass, but who cares, so what?" "It's easy for you, you're out, but I'm not, it's harder for me." "Well, I guess I can understand you dropping out, but why stop seeing Aaron?" "Because, Brittany could just tell my secret anyways, and if I wasn't with Aaron, than he would be safe. He wouldn't have to go through the hell with me." "You can't just shut him out, you need someone there for you. You need to tell him." "Listen, I appreciate your help, but I know what's best for me, ok." "Ok, are you ok to get back to class?" "Yeah, thanks, and listen, I appreciate if you don't tell anyone about this conversation." "Considerate erased from my memory." "Thanks, I appreciate it." "I just hope you know what your doing?" Did I know what I was doing? On the way back to class, I thought about what Neil said. Would it be better if I told Aaron everything? Is it the right thing to do? I just don't know, my life is a lot more complicated now. All class period, I didn't listen to a thing the teacher said, my mind was already filled with problems, I didn't need anymore, especially math ones. After school, I went to my car, and I saw Aaron waiting there for me. "I thought I told you to go away Aaron." "Listen, Josh, I don't know where this whole thing is coming from, but nothing is going to stop me from seeing you, nothing." "It is just better for the both of us if you go away, now, please." "Is Percy or Brittany doing this to you, cause if they are, than I will kill them personally myself." "Nobody is doing this except me, now please just go." I was nearly coming to tears trying to tell Aaron this. "But I don't understand Josh, did I do something?" He was nearly coming to tears as well, which made this much harder. "No, your great, we just can't see each other, trust me, it is the best." "But...but...Josh...I love you." That nearly broke my heart, him telling me that he loved me for the first time, I thought I even saw a little tear going down his face. "I love you to Aaron, which is why we can't see each other, goodbye." Then I got in my car, and drove off, crying for the second time today. I looked in my rearview mirror, and saw Aaron walking off crying as well. This was the best thing, Aaron was safe, and that was all I cared about. To be continued... So now you guys are probably grabbing for the tissues, I know I almost cried just writing this. This was probably the most heart wrenching thing I've written, but it had to be done. I hope that you guys aren't too bored, who am I kidding, how could you be bored. Trust me when I say that this story is just getting better.