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I have received a few e-mails about how fast the
story is going. I am writing this in sort of a catch up mood. I want to
get to the place where the family really starts, but having said that,
this chapter will go into much more detail about the early years and
hopefully will not be too long for you.
Life had not been going well for me, I mean I was having to re-think my
entire life and belief system. Eddie came out to me a few months ago
and I know I did not handle it well at the time, but he did not give up
on me. I had to really think about things. I mean I had always thought
that gay people were guys who had a lisp and acted like girls. But
Eddie was on the football team for christ's sake. All I can say is that
it really made think about the things I had been taught.
There was a new dude at school today and he seems to be pretty cool. He
is good looking, but does not seem to realize it. He was really nervous
though. I think I will try to get to know him. Hell as they always say,
you can't have too many friends.
Well Jase is a really cool guy. He is my age and I really like him. He
is like a really open and honest dude. I had noticed he talked about
someone named Joey and I asked some questions, well I finally got some
answers. Joey is is son!!! He is my age and has a son and he takes care
of him, loves him and it amazes me. Most of the dudes I know would have
ran the other way if the had a kid on the way.
Well I finally got the truth. Jase is gay, though he made sure to tell
me that while I was good looking, he knew I was straight and would
never betray our friendship by hitting on him. I knew that, he had not
looked at me in the gym shower but once and I could not complain as I
was checking him out too...you know the regular guy thing.
I finally got to meet Joey and he is a wonderful kid. He always seems
to have a smile on his face and he is so quiet and sweet. I think I
have fallen in love with someone else's kid!
There was a new kid that started school today. His name is Chad and I
could tell right away that Jase was in lust or something. Jase is not
super shy or anything, but he usually takes awhile to warm up to
someone, but he invited Chad to sit with us at lunch and everything. We
found out that we have all the same classes but one and I am the one
who is in a different class.
Chad seems like a really cool guy though. I am pretty sure he likes
Jase too. I guess I must have the straight equivalent of gaydar or
something. I hope that I am right for Jase's sake.
Well the three of us have gotten along really well. We are like the
three musketeers or something. It is kinda funny that my two best
friends are gay, but what can I do? We all share too many interests and
have the same sense of humor. We all like the same books, the same
music and all kinds of other things. It is like we were designed to be
best friends, or fated to be or something.
Chad told me today that he was gay and had fallen for Jase. I almost
laughed, but tried to keep a straight face so I did not out Jase. I
promised that I would not do that and I won't. I just told him that he
should tell Jase and things would work out. I told him that Jase would
never hate him for something like that.
I think that if some of the guys on the football team knew that their
star receiver was gay they would have a stroke. hehe. I think that
since I have known most of those guys all my life, they would be ok
with it if I was. We are all pretty good buds. I know that the
basketball team would be cool. I guess I just figure that at some point
one or both of them will come out and I am already compiling a list of
those who will help and those who won't.
Jase told Chad he was gay and Chad told Jase he liked him and was gay
too. I expect that this will be an interesting summer. I expect that I
will be left out now that those two can get together. I just hope I
will be able to see Joey from time to time.
Well I have a girlfriend. Tammy is so sweet and she acts like it is no
problem with me hanging out with Chad and Jase so much. I guess I was
wrong about the two of them hooking up and leaving me out. They are
sort of a couple, but still more friends than boy friends.
They always include me and Tammy in any plans they make, and I do the
same. Tammy never seems to include them, but I guess she wants me to
Tammy is not the girl I wanna marry that is for sure. Hell she is a
dead lay. I mean I could probably get more life out of a dead fish.
Don't get me wrong, I like her a lot and we do have a lot of the same
interests and stuff, but sex is no fun. I know sex is not everything,
but if it is no fun then it will lead to other problems.
Jase told me that the reason that he and Chad have not become sexually
active with each other and not made more of a commitment to each other
is that his Uncle told him about his youth and pointed out that a
relationship that will last is one that is built on friendship first
and foremost. I have been thinking about that a lot. I think that when
this relationship implodes, I am going do the same thing they are.
Wow we are going to the concert that all of us have been talking about
and wanting to go see. Jase's Uncle got the tickets, but he only got
enough for us, he did not think to include Tammy. I explained that
Jase's uncle had gotten the tickets and had only been able to get the
five. She had really wanted to go too, but she seemed to understand.
Well we had a great time at the concert! It was a great show and the
five of us really got along well. At school on Monday, Jase and Chad
said that Tammy was giving them mean looks, and they had been hearing a
lot of comments about fags. I had not heard anything, so I told 'em
that it was just boys being boys type shit. In other words I blew it
The next day, I went to the bathroom. I was in the stall when I heard
the door open and a couple of guys walk in. They were talking and what
I heard pissed me off to no end. The one guy asked the other if he
thought that what Tammy had said about Chad was really true. The other
guy said that he did not know, but he said that Chad and Jase sure
spent a lot of time together, so they probably were fags, but if they
were, they would never make me into a fag like Tammy had said.
At the start of the next class I stood up and asked to say something. I
then said, "I just found out that my slut of a girlfriend has been
telling people that my two best friends are gay, simply because they
asked me to go to a concert and did not invite her, even though they
did not get the tickets. I am going to say right now that if you want
to talk about my buds, then you are talking about me and if you want to
think I am gay too, that is cool. I could care less. If any of you guys
want a good lay, then don't bother with Tammy cause she is a dead
I spent the rest of the week telling all my friends about what a dead
lay Tammy was, and how much of a bitch she was. I think she will regret
messing with me or my friends.
(WE SKIP TO FRESHMAN YEAR AT IUS)
Chad and Jase are like perfect parents! Joey has more love than just
about any kid I know. Our friendship had grown over the years, and I
had learned that the Jase approach to dating was a very good idea. I
had met a few girls that I liked, but they never lasted because there
was nothing but lust there.
I had just recently met a girl named Traci, and I really liked her. She
was such a bubbly person, always had a smile on her face. She even
passed my J&C test. I had told the guys that from now on, the girls
I dated or became friends with would have to be ok with them and their
relationship or I would have nothing to do with them, and since I do
not seem to notice things, I asked them to tell me if they seen any
signs that they were not accepted. I called that, my J&C test.
Things in our world came apart on March 18. Larry and Terry were killed
in a car wreck. Jase came apart at the seams. Chad and I were there
with him thank goodness. We held him all night and helped him make all
the arrangements and everything. He felt he had to tell his folks. but
at the same time he did not want to call them. We decided that we would
all go to Bardstown and tell them in person.
I was shocked to say the least by what we found there. Jase's dad
laughed about it. He told Billy (Jase's lil bro) that is what happened
to fags like him. I happened to be looking at Jase when his dad said
that, and the color drained from his face, and his eyes went blank then
filled with a look I hope to NEVER see in another person for as long as
I live. It was like a white hot, yet ice cold look and then Jase
attacked his dad. He beat the man to within an inch of his life. By the
time we got him off his dad and called the police and EMT's, his dad
was in bad shape, not that any of us really cared too much.
Jase's Mom had left and his little sister had ran away. Billy was the
only one to stay and I could tell that there would have to be a lot of
work done with him. He was a mess. After the police had arrived and
taken a report and Jase's dad was taken to the hospital Billy quietly
told Jase about the sexual abuse that had been inflicted on him. Jase
wanted to kill his dad and it was very obvious in his eyes that if his
dad had been there, he would have done just that.
We went to the hospital to have Billy examined right away. They done a
rape kit exam, and took lots of pictures of him, they then called the
police and child protective services. After all the forms had been
filled out and reports taken, they told us that Billy would most likely
be taken to foster care soon, but they would allow him to stay with
Jase until the funeral was over and they had a chance to file papers in
Jase called an attorney as soon as we got back home. He was livid that
they would try to take Billy. He told us he was not sure how he would
pay for an attorney, but he would not allow them to take his lil bro!
It turns out he did not have to worry.
The next day, the attorney in charge of the will stopped by to talk to
Jase and the rest of us it turns out. He told us that while there was a
will, and it expressed where things were to go, the guys had set up
things so that there would not be any probate or anything. Jase and
Chad got several rental properties, Terry and Larry had placed their
names on all the deeds, so ownership did not need to be transferred.
There were several bank accounts that also had both of their names on
them, the business which also had their names on it. Finally there were
trust funds set up for both of them. The trust funds were set up to
allow up to $100,000 each to be taken out each year until they turned
25 at which time they could access all the money.
To my surprise, Terry and Larry had included me. They left me several
rental properties and a smaller trust fund. I think that we were all a
bit overwhelmed by the time the lawyer left. Billy was stunned to find
he had been left a trust fund as well, though his was much different
than ours. He would not be allowed to take any money out, with the
exception of enough to purchase a new car and to pay insurance and
college expenses if he went, until he was 25.
Terry and Larry were very wealthy men. They had saved and invested
money from the start and the business provided well too. They had
amassed a fortune and had decided to leave it all to us. I think out of
all of us, I was the most stunned to have been included, I mean hell I
was not even family. The lawyer had left me a letter that Larry and
Terry had written. Later that evening, I took sometime to read it when
I had some time alone.
If you are reading this, then we have died. I know that you are
wondering why we included you in the will. We included you because you
have been a steadfast and loyal friend to Jason. You were his first
friend here and you have stuck by him through thick and thin. We know
you want to be an attorney and we wanted to make sure you would have
the money to do that, we also wanted to give you enough of a start
financially to be able to open your own practice when you are done with
school. We hope that you will open it here in town and will serve and
Jason and Chad's attorney both personal and business. Of course the
money and all have no bearing on that. If you chose to move and work
for someone or whatever, the money and property are still yours. We
just felt the need to tell you our hopes. Please take care of our boys.
Take care of yourself, and find you a good girl to settle down with.
Larry and Terry
Well needless to say, I decided right then that I would do exactly as
they requested. It was not a hard decision anyway. I mean I loved Jase
and Chad like brothers and did not want to leave them or Joey.
The attorney that Jase called made swift work of getting custody of
Billy. CPS in Bardstown were just as happy to get rid of him when they
found out that he was gay. That pissed me off big time! I decided that
I would try to learn all I could about business law and family law. I
wanted to be able to help others with these type of problems.
Once the funeral was over, Chad and I sat down and had a long talk. We
decided to move out of the house so that it could be remodeled. We
wanted to open it up and make it ours. I think that both of us wanted
it redone so that it did not remind us so much of my uncles. We called
the architect and told him what we wanted. Basically we wanted to place
the family room in the basement, along with a game room and bar. We
wanted to have 7 master bedrooms and baths built, wanted and enclosed
and heated pool and hot tub. I know it sounds like a lot, but really we
wanted to have space for family and friends if they visited and we
wanted large rooms and baths so that they would feel more at home.
We also discussed the business and many other things. We decided to
hire someone to run the business while we were in college. I really
didn't want to run it and was quite willing to sell it, but Chad said
he would run it when we got out of school. I wanted to open a book
store and he supported that.
We also decided that we would ask Danny to move into the house once it
was finished. We also decided that we would have to hire a
housekeeper/nanny for Joey. We had to call the architect back and have
him design a new garage and apartment. By the time the design was
ready, we have a 5 car garage and two bedroom apartment above that.
We moved into a hotel for the remodel. During that time, we took out an
ad for live in help for Joey and the house. We talked to Danny about
moving in and he told us that he would move in, as long as we had no
problem with him bringing a date home if he wanted to. Of course we
told him that was not a problem.
We had several interviews with prospective help, but either Joey did
not like them, Danny did not like them, or one of us did not like them,
or as was the case most of the time, they could not handle us as a gay
couple. About a week before the house was completed, we met a nice lady
named Linda. She was about 45 and she had no problem with us being gay,
and we all liked her. After settling on a salary and a date for her to
move in and start we hired her.
Chad, Danny and I met several times with the attorney and accountant to
discuss various things, including investment strategy. All three of us
wanted to take a much more active role in investing our money, but
wanted to take some classes first. The accountant did not like that at
all, but he would have to get over it.
We got Billy into therapy to deal with what had been done to him. He
went everyday for a while, but was down to once a week by the time the
house was completed. We got him a nice car and took him shopping to get
new clothes. He didn't want to go to school that year, so we hired a
teacher to home school him for the rest of the year. He did very well
and I expected that when he got back to school he would fit right in.
We toured the almost completed house and decided to go buy new
furniture and stuff for it. That was a lot of fun. Joey was old enough
to start making choices about what he liked. He was really into Peanuts
and so we got him that kind of stuff for his room. We got him a huge
bed, even though he was a little guy, he would get bigger.
We decided to put king size beds in all the bedrooms and picked out
furniture for the rest of the house. Nothing we got was pretentious. We
got stuff that we would be comfortable on and stuff that was good for
By the time everything was set up in the house and we all moved back
in, we had blown a lot of money. We were not anywhere near broke, but
we did want to cut back on spending. Chad and I wanted to be able to
build a future for ourselves and to do that we did not want to take the
money for granted.
Linda proved to be a very smart addition to our little family. She was
great with Joey and he loved her. She kept the house clean and cooked
great meals. As I have said before we all liked basic meals, we were
not into fancy food. Basic meat and potatoes, italian, mexican and that
type of thing and she was great at fixing that type of stuff.
Chad and my relationship continued to deepen and grow. We talked about
everything, made every decision together. We had decided that we were a
committed couple and every major decision affected us both, as well as
Joey and Billy. We talked about a lot of things and made a lot of
decisions during those days.
One of the big things we talked about besides the business and finances
was how to raise the kids. Both of us knew that we wanted to be as open
and honest as possible with each other and the kids. We both had our
own ideas about drinking, smoking and stuff. We decided we liked the
European method of teaching kids to drink responsibly from a young age.
Therefore the bar in the family room was stocked and the kids would be
allowed to drink and wine or beer would be served with dinner if we
wanted it. Joey was still to young, but Billy wasn't. The one firm rule
about drinking was that it was to be done at home only, unless they
would be somewhere were they could spend the night. No drinking and
We talked like guys and we were not going to tell the kids that there
were words that were not allowed. If someone was pissed off, then they
should say they were pissed off. I hated the idea that you could not
say certain words when I grew up and I would not inflict that on the
Luckily Chad agreed with everything with the exception of smoking. We
did not agree on that at all. He said that we should not allow it at
all, and I thought that forbidding it was a sure way to get them to try
it and maybe hide it from us. We did come to agreement though. We
decided that we would not approve of it, but if they did it, we would
rather know about it.
We had almost the same issues with drugs. We both firmly did not want
them using drugs, but knew that forbidding it would mean that if they
did it, they would hide it and we may too late to help them if we
needed to. We decided that we would tell them that we did not approve
of drugs at all, but if they had to try them, we would rather know
Since it all guys, except Linda, we pretty much had a clothing optional
household, except when Linda would be in the house. She was actually in
the house about 4 hours a day. She made dinner and cleaned. She took
care of Joey in her apartment during the time we were in class.
Billy was doing a lot better with all the therapy. He was a good kid
and I loved him. I did have a lot of concerns about taking him in. I
mean I loved my lil bro, but with all that had been done to him, I was
afraid he would have a lot of problems. I also did not want to stick
him in foster care or anything, knowing that would cause more problems
in the long run. I guess I just had to worry about something.
Chad had a bit more in common with Billy since they were both football
players. Billy was a really good looking guy. He was as tall as me, but
more built from football. How he managed to not get outted by dad still
I do know that Billy was scared to death to testify against dad when it
came time for his trial, but his therapy paid off and he held his own
very well. The defense lawyer tried to use outing him as a scare
tactic, but since he no longer lived there and had been in therapy, the
tactic did not work.
Billy and I had a lot of conversations about staying in the closet. He
was not ready to come out, but did not want to hide it either. I told
him that what I had done was to tell anyone who asked, but did not
flaunt it. He seemed to think that was the best idea and that is what
he decided to do when school started again.
That summer, in June to be exact, Chad's folks came over to visit and
tell us some news. It seems that they would be moving, as his Dad's job
required it. Chad's lil bro, Jon did not want to move and threw a
massive fit. He started to get into trouble, became hateful to his
folks, and would not talk to anyone. By the end of the month, his folks
were at a loss as to what to do. They were afraid that if they didn't
do something soon, he would end up in jail.
Shortly before the July 4th holiday, everything came to a head with
him. He was arrested for underage drinking, and his folks went off.
Chad brought him to the house for a couple of days to allow
everyone to cool off. That night, Chad and Jon got into a huge argument
and it all finally came out, no pun intended. Jon was gay too and had
no desire to move to Alabama where he knew that he would be even more
hated than he would in our area. He at least knew some gay people here
and had friends and shit.
That night Chad asked me what I thought about asking his folks if it
would be ok to let him move in with us. "Well we have a lot of
responsibilities already Chad, but if you think it would be best for
him to live here and you think that he can abide by our rules, then I
guess we can give it a try." I told him.
"I really wanna give him a chance. I think that his recent problems all
come from this situation, cause I know he has always been a good kid. I
just hope my folks will allow it." He said.
At our BBQ on the fourth, we pulled his folks off to the side to talk
to them about things. Chad started the conversation. "Mom, Dad we found
out what is going on with Jon. He probably should tell you this
himself, but we are doing it cause we wanted to talk to you about an
idea we had. Jon is gay and he doesn't want to move to Alabama. If you
think about it you can see why. I mean a gay teen in the bible belt!
Here he has good role models in Jase and me, and good friends."
I took over at that point. "Jon is acting out, hoping that
somehow he can keep you from moving. We all know that you really have
no choice, but he really does not seem to understand that."
Chad said, "I think if you all would agree with us, we could allow him
to move in here with us. I mean we have the room, and we are certainly
not lacking in money to care for him. He would have to agree to live
with our rules and stay out of trouble. However I would be willing to
bet that would not be a problem."
Chad's mom and dad looked at us both for a few minutes before they said
anything. "You both are so young and you already have Joey and Billy,
are you sure you could handle adding Jon?" His dad asked.
"We talked about it and we think we can handle it, but like I said he
has to keep up his end of the bargain. I think that we can pose it to
him as a trial period and if he can stay out of trouble til Christmas,
we can make it permanent. Of course it would be for us, but he does not
need to know that. The thing is we all know that he is a good kid, and
I think that he will return to that kid soon enough." Chad told them.
"Well leave us here for a bit and we will talk about it." Chad's mom
We left them and went back to chatting with our guests. About an hour
later, they pulled us off to the side again and told us that if he
agreed to our conditions he would be allowed to move in. They did want
us to take some money for his upkeep, but I refused and told them that
we would take care of things, but if they wanted to do something, they
could buy him a new car. We would have to if they didn't and I thought
that would allow them to feel they had contributed.
After the guests had left that evening, and before we left to see the
fireworks, Jon sat down with us and his folks. I told Chad that he
would be the one to present the offer to Jon and he agreed.
"Jon, even though you have been an ass about everything, both Jase and
I think we have an idea that will allow you to stay here. The thing is
you have agree to our rules, stay out of legal trouble and this will
only be a trial period. If you can stay out of trouble and follow our
rules, then after Christmas we can make it permanent." Chad told him
Jon's whole face lit up as he heard he could stay, and he looked at
both of us, then his folks with a look of hope on his face. I honestly
did not think that his smile could get any bigger when his folks told
him that he could stay, but when they also told him they were going to
get him a car, it certainly got bigger.
"I promise I will stay out of trouble and I'll follow your rules. I was
just scared to death to move down there. I will do whatever you want."
He told us very quickly. Since a lot of his stuff was already packed
for the move, he was to move in that weekend. His folks would get the
car the following week before they had to leave for their new home. He
was told though that if there were any problems with the attorney, he
may still have to move, at least for a while.
As it turned out, all that needed to be done was assigning Chad and I
to be his legal guardians. Once the papers were filled out and signed,
everything was taken care of. The attorney did suggest to the folks,
that they change their will and assign us custody of Jon if something
were to happen to them. He told them that unless they did that, there
was little chance of us both getting custody. We later found out that
he was lying, but we'll get to that later.
Chad and I did have to discuss one thing we had not thought about
before and that was curfews. After a pretty lengthy discussion, we
decided to make 8 p.m. for under 13, midnight for 13 to 15 and 2 a.m.
for 16 and 17 and none from 18 on if they stayed at the house. All
times could be extended if we knew where they were to be.
We sat Billy and Jon down and explained all our rules with them. We
told them that they would be given $100 a week for expenses, more if
they needed it for something specific. We told them that they would be
expected to clean up after themselves in the kitchen, and their
bedrooms. They were to wash their own sheets and stuff. Jeans and stuff
were to be put in the laundry chute and Linda would wash them. We told
them that if they wanted to have an overnight guest, they could have
them, but they needed to let us know about it.
I told both Billy and Jon that we were not their parents, we were their
brothers and we were not strict about most things, but the few rules we
had had better be followed. "You guys need to know that you can come to
talk to either of us about anything. If you have a problem, let one or
both of us know. If you have questions about anything, then ask one or
both of us. I don't care if the questions are about sex, or about
school or whatever. We will always answer with complete honesty, and if
we don't know something, then we will let you know that too." I told
"One thing that is not negotiable at all is that when you leave this
house you have your cell phone on you and have it turned on, unless you
are in school or a hospital, otherwise set it to vibrate if you feel
like you do not want to disturb people. If we try to get in touch with
you and it is not on, you will lose the car for a week. If it happens
again, you will lose the car for a month. I am not playing about this!
Third time gets you sent to mom and dad Jon, and gets you no car for 6
months Billy. This is really more about safety than anything and I will
not play with that!" Chad told them.
"Another thing that we have to talk about is grades. If grades start to
slip, then we have a problem and will have to deal with it. I don't
wanna be a hard ass, I know that things happen and grades can drop once
in a while, but if that continues, then we will have to do something
about it and that could be a lot of different things, and we will
decide then what is to happen." I told them.
"You guys are both gay, and so are we, but Danny is straight and we
fully respect him. That dude is like one amazing guy and I hope you
will treat him with respect. I hope you both find someone to love and
in time make love with, but I hope you take the time to build a
relationship." Chad told them.
"Oh one more thing, if you want to have a pool party, or small
gatherings, that is cool. If anyone is going to be drinking, I need to
talk to their folks or they do not drink! We are really open about
drinking and you know that, but we are not going to jail for underage
drinking. Anyway, just let us know a day or two in advance if you are
going to have more than two or three of your friends over." Chad told
them almost as an after thought.
"Are both of you ok with these rules?" I asked.
"Hell yeah" Billy said with a smile.
"Very cool with them" Jon said.
I got up and grabbed four beers and talked about what if anything they
needed or wanted to get for the summer, and just basically shot the
shit for awhile. I noticed that Jon and Billy were looking at each
other a lot. Chad noticed too cause he shot me a little questioning
look to see if I had noticed. I did.
Later that night, Chad and I talked about those looks. We both thought
it was kinda funny that Billy was more like Chad and Jon was more like
me. Chad and Billy had sports in common and Jon and I had computers and
books in common. Of course all four of us were avid readers, but Jon
and I were much more into books. It just struck us as funny that our
brothers were more like out lovers than us.
We also wondered if they would get together. We thought that if they
did that would be another funny coincidence. Oh well. If they like each
other and want to get together, then we would support them all the way.