Date: Wed, 18 Jun 2008 18:59:20 +0200
From: feistontibia@gmail.com
Subject: For the sake of it: Emotions on display chapter 4

Written by: Feist
E-mail: feistontibia@gmail.com


---------------------DISCLAIMER--------------------
This story will eventually contain sexual acts
between underage males. It will also contain strong
language, violence and graphic details.
If you are underage, stop reading now.
If you live in an area where any of these before
mentioned acts are illegal, stop reading now.
If you're offended by existentialist views, or sexual
acts between male teenagers, stop reading now.
If this does not apply for you, enjoy reading!
---------------------DISCLAIMER--------------------


				CHAPTER 4

When I awoke next morning, nothing felt out of the ordinary. The
realisation of my dad being...hadn't really dawned on me yet. I don't
know if it was some kind of defense mechanism, but whatever it was, it
made sure I didn't feel too much pain. Of course thinking about him
hurt, I missed him and wanted to see him. Tell him things that I wasn't
able to tell him before. I mean, how often do you tell your parents that
you love them? Normally you just take everything for granted. And just
like that, he's gone, and you realize how..little appreciation you
always gave him. He was my dad, he basically.."produced" me. He had
given me food, worked hard to support me, was there when I needed him,
and basically everything in my life was somehow related to him. That
connection was now gone. Suddenly. Ripped away from me never to return
again. That hurt, but the tears wouldn't come.

Downstairs I heard the noise of pots and pans. My grandma was probably
already awake and preparing breakfast. My grandma isn't in my house
often, so never mind sleeping over. But the few times she DID, she made
sure she cleaned the house spotless, prepared food three times a day,
and did all the laundry. It must've been a habit of her that she didn't
want to lose yet. It made her feel in control. I also didn't know if my
mom was physically up to the job right now. I stepped out of bed and
walked over to the bathroom to get showered. I washed myself thoroughly
and tried to let the water rejuvenate my body and soul. For some reason
I always felt like new when I got out of the shower. I'm not complete
without one. I was rinsing my whole body with melon-grape shampoo, and
for some reason the scent of this calmed me a bit. It had
something..harmless about it. Because of the warm water, and being a
teenage boy, some other parts of my body started to react. I felt my
dick stiffening, while something sexual was the last thing on my mind. I
did grab my dick though and softly started massaging it.

I put some soap on my hand, to make it feel even more slippery. I always
liked this. I continued stroking myself slowly, leaning against the
wall. My mind soon began to fill with images of boys that I liked in my
class. And then especially of Dario, the guy from my English class. He
was also in the same P.E class as me, and so I have seen his body a
million times already. Everything about him is cute; his short hair, his
gorgeous eyes, his body..You could clearly see the outline of some six
pack forming. And then there was his ass. He had the most gorgeous ass
I've ever seen on a boy. Nice, soft but firm. I just wanted to touch
him, feel him everywhere, kiss him...I don't think I would ever survive
one of his kisses. With that thought, I sped up a little, feeling
wonderful sensations going through my whole body. I'd give anything to
just see Dario naked, he was perfection for me and I was sure he also
had a nice dick, remembering the clear outline his boxers normally had
in the locker room. Wow how I wanted to hold him, stroke him like I was
stroking myself, seeing him close his eyes and moaning. I'd drop to my
knees, and suck him off slowly. I'd take him in as deep as possible, and
he would softly push himself further, enjoying what I was doing to him.
When the thoughts of him having an orgasm in my mouth entered my brain,
I came myself. Big spurts of cum erupted from my dick and shot against
the wall, and dribbled down slowly. It was one of the best orgasms I've
had lately. I tried to hold in my moans as I knew my mother's room was
very close and she was probably still in it.

When I washed away the remnants of my orgasm from the wall, I washed my
hair once more and then decided to get out. Let's see what grandma
prepared. I dried myself off and checked the shower once more for some
signs of what I did. That would just be too embarrassing. I got dressed
and walked downstairs into the hallway. From there I could already smell
the sausages and scrambled eggs. I headed over to the kitchen and saw my
grandma, who turned around from the stove and immediatly got a worried
expression on her face.

"Good morning boy, how did you sleep? I've prepared some sausages and
eggs. I don't know if you're up for them yet, but if so then.. I know I
could use a healthy breakfast" she spoke kindly, hurrying me towards a
chair in the living room. She came and brought me a plate filled with
sausages and egg, and bread to go along with it. It had been months
since I had such a breakfast. My grandma really did know how to surprise
people.

"I'm going to wake up your mother now dear, see if she'd like some. We
can't let her stay in bed all day" my grandma said, already walking
towards the hallway. I looked at the sausages and decided I was actually
very hungry. I can't remember to have had dinner yesterday, and I was
starving. I spread the scrambled eggs over my bread, and started slicing
my sausages to put them on them. I then took a bite, and it actually
tasted really good. From upstairs I heard a loud sob, and knew my mom
probably was asleep until my grandma woke her up. The stairs creaked,
and a few seconds later my grandma was here again, sitting down at the
table.

"I've called school already Damian, they told you to just rest some and
come back when you feel like it. They also send their best. About your
mom, I already called her off from work, she tried to argue with me
yesterday night, but I don't give in that quickly." she said with a
stern look on her face. It was obvious who was in charge now for the
remainder of her stay. She must secretly love to have two children to
control again. Brings her back to the old days. Even though the
situation is not very profitable.

A few moments later I heard the door open and there was my mom. Her hair
was a mess, and her eyes were red and swollen. It was obvious she had
been crying. She slowly walked towards the table and let herself fall
into a chair. From then on she just looked forward into nothingness,
with a depressed look on her face. My grandma tried to snap her out of
it.

"Helen, come on. I've made you some breakfast, just try a bit of these
eggs. You always used to love eggs?" my grandma told her, half smiling.
She put some of the eggs on a plate and handed it over to my mom. My mom
grabbed a fork, and rummaged with the food. Looking at it as if it were
the most uninteresting thing in the world. She let out a deep sigh, and
took a bite. She slowly chewed the food and swallowed it. It was truly
agonizing to see my mother this way. But then something weird happened.
She sat up straight, and took more confident bites. She regained some of
her posture, and started eating more quickly. Me and my grandma watched
her finish her plate, after which she stood up to bring it to the
kitchen. From out of the kitchen we suddenly heard my mom.

"Damian, can you go upstairs and wake up your dad? He'll be late for
work!" my mom half shouted at me. My grandma and me looked at each
other, both with mixed expressions on our face.

"Mom..?" I tried, to see if she were joking.

"Not now darling, just go upstairs and wake him up. He'll be complaining
about being late again." my mom's voice started to sound irritated, and
I was now really getting confused.

"Ehm..mom...what do you mean about...dad..? he's... not here
remember..." I said carefully, not knowing what else to say.

"Damian, if I have to come in there myself, you'll be sorry. Now go
upstairs and wake him up." She now sounded mad, and I knew better than
to object to her. My grandma's face was one of complete worry again, the
way I had seen her since the moment she came in our house yesterday. She
stood up from the table and walked to the kitchen. I heard some
whispering again like last night, and knew that my grandmother was
trying to talk some sense into her. But just a few moments later, I was
able to make out bits of the conversation.

"No, I do NOT stay at home today, you hear me mom?" my mom said, as if
it were out of the question. "Damian has to go to school, and George has
to go to his work soon. What are you actually doing here?" My grandma
didn't now how to reply to this and told her things straight.

"Listen helen, your husband died in a car accident yesterday remember?
That's why I'm here, to help you and Damian." my grandma tried to tell
her with reason in her voice. My mom clearly didn't get what she meant,
because it stayed quiet for a while after which I heard her breaking
into tears all over again. I looked around and saw my mom coming out of
the kitchen, her hands in front of her face, walking towards the nearest
couch and lying down on it. My grandma followed shortly and motioned me
to come to the kitchen. I stood up and followed her.

"Listen Damian, I don't think your mother is....accepting yesterday's
events. I think I'm going to call a doctor to make an appointment for
her. Do you have anything to keep you occupied for a few hours ?" she
said softly, making sure my mom couldn't hear us.

"Yea I think I do," I told her. "I might as well go to school, I'd only
be thirty minutes late. And with yesterday's events, I don't think
anyone cares.

"OK, then I'm going to make an appointment and drop you off at school,
then take your mom to the doctor." she said matter of factly. She
grabbed the phone and walked outside with it. She clearly needed to have
that conversation alone. I walked over to my mother and placed an arm
over her shoulder, she extended her own arm and pulled me close. She
didn't say anything, and I didn't say anything. We didn't have to.

Ten minutes later we were in my grandma's car. My grandma behind the
wheel, my mom next to her, and me in the back. My mom was just staring
out of the window, seeing things only she could see. We passed by a few
shops, and every once in a while my mom would comment about something
that she had to buy for my dad. If this was going to continue, I don't
know what my mom would end up like. My grandma took a look at me through
the rear view mirror every few seconds, worried that I might be up to
something weird too. When we finally arrived at my school, I stepped out
of the car, told my grandma goodbye and gave my mom a big kiss on her
cheek. I didn't care who was able to see me from the school grounds, my
mother needed it badly. I then closed her door, turned around and walked
towards the school. The school yard was completely empty. I saw some
small cans and dirt paper laying around the yard, indicating there had
been a lot of people before school started. The walk from where I
stepped out of the car until school's front door was about three hundred
feet, and especially when there was no one there, it took forever to
walk it. I opened the door and went to the direction's office, to notify
them I was attending school today. I knocked three times and opened the
door. Inside I saw a grumpy lady sitting behind a desk. She was known
not to like students very much, and gave them a hard time. I took a few
looks through the room to see who else was there.

"Excuse me, can I help you with something?" the grumpy lady said with a
rather sarcastic tone. I really wasn't in the mood for it.

"Yes, my name is Damian Roberts, and I'm here because my grandmother
called me sick this morning. I decided to come however, but now I seem
to be late.."I spoke up honestly. I hoped she wouldn't be too hard on
me, and just notate me and let me leave.

"So you were going to skip school today, but thought better of it?" she
spoke up, with a clear hint of irony in it.

"Something like that yea, but I had my reasons. The thing is, I'm here
now, so if you could please give me a hall pass..."

"You do know there's punishments for being late, according to
regulations, don't you?" she said, authoritative.

"I'm aware of that, but my situation requires a..special treatment
perhaps." I said, now clearly getting pissed off with her.

"So you think your special huh? Now tell me, what's so important that
YOU are allowed to be late, while others aren't" she said, daring me to
speak.

"Well Miss, my dad died yesterday. He drove his jeep into the bus I was
sitting in, which almost killed me. My mom is now going to the doctor,
because she can't handle it and flips out." I said, matter of factly.
The lady stayed silent for a few seconds. I guess she must've felt
ashamed for some reason, even though it was partly my bluntness.

"Very well then," she composed herself "I'll write you a letter that
you're going to give to your teacher. I'm sorry for your loss.." she
said, with a rather dumb look in her eyes. She probably never had anyone
giving this excuse to her.

I walked to my class, which was almost at the other end of the building.
The school itself was rather new, the paint was still fresh and there
were windows everywhere so you could look out over the sports fields
that were close by. I finally arrived at the classroom, knocked three
times and opened the door. The teacher started talking abruptly.

"Welcome Damian, so glad you could still join us today." he said with a
polite but concerned look on his face that betrayed the fact he knew
what happened to me. "Did you find yourself...capable of going to school
after...yesterday's events?" he asked me. I didn't really know what to
tell him. What kind of an impression would I make if I would just tell
him the whole case didn't matter to me? I didn't want to come over so
heartless.

"I'm fine Mr. Baker," I told him, making sure I didn't look too sad or
too happy. "I didn't know what to do at home so I decided to get my mind
off things and come to school." I walked towards my chair and sat down.
Next to me was a cute boy, Dennis, who was fascinated by world history
class. If I ever had a question, I could ask him. The thing about Dennis
is that he's quite...nervous. He's always moving his legs, fumbling or
twisting something with his hand, or looking through the class. Or
everything at the same time. If you payed attention to it, it could be
well annoying. The moment I had placed my book on the table, Dennis
spoke up.

"Hey Damian! I've heard what happened..I'm sooo sorry about your loss
dude..." he whispered to me, careful not to let the teacher hear it. I
watched in front of me and saw that the teacher actually saw this but
pretended he didn't. He really was a good guy when he needed to be.

"Thanks Dennis...and I'm fine, I think I'll manage. How's class going?"
I asked him, trying to divert the subject to something different.

"Not too bad, we're now covering some stuff about the renaissance, and I
took about three papers of notes already. Think you need them?" he
asked, looking up at me hopefully.

"That's fine Dennis, maybe later. I don't think I've got my mind on the
subject right now." I said with a small grin on my face. It always
intrigued me how Dennis could write down pages of notes, while the
teacher had only said about 5 sentences. His face reddened somewhat, and
he seemed to get uncomfortable.

"Oh that's right..yea, of course. I should've thought.." he spoke up,
clearly uncomfortable now. The way he was twisting his pen and looking
towards his table showed he didn't know what else to say to me.

"It's OK Dennis, it's not your fault. I'll take ove the notes later." I
tried to tell him somewhat cheerful, hoping he'd get comfortable again.
He really is a sweetheart, he just doesn't realise it. I took my own
pencil out of my bag and pretended to pay attention. My teacher knew
better though, but couldn't care less. As long as I wouldn't cry or
disturb his class, he didn't bother me. This was actually the first time
I was really able to think about my dad's death. In bed I was too numb
for my thoughts to get through me, but here, in a classroom, it came up
up immediately.

Why did it have to be my dad..what's the point of it? He was saving up
to take us on a holiday, and now he wasn't going to come with us. Which
means we're probably not going anymore anyway. There were so many things
he wanted to succeed in life. He wanted to start his own company, buy
ourself a bigger house, show us more of the world, all those things that
people work towards. But in the end nothing came true of that, and all
the work had been for nothing. I couldn't come clear with this, I
couldn't understand why it had to be that way.

At some point I snapped out of it, and started listening to Mr. Baker.
It was actually the end of the class, and just as I was about to stand
up and walk away, Dennis spoke to me.

"Hey Damian..you know, if any thing's bothering you or...I don't
know..." He looked at the floor, obviously too shy to look me in the
face. "You can talk with me OK?" He said quickly. He then looked up for
a few seconds, aimed his eyes to the floor again, turned around and
walked away. I stood there not knowing what to think. That was really
nice of Dennis to say. I always found him a bit odd, but this showed
some character. He might turn out to be a better friend...Wow, stop
there. A friend? I don't have any real friends, I have acquaintances.
Until recently I didn't see the need of a friend either. Really, would I
need a friend like Dennis? No.. I don't, I can handle myself and I
definitely don't have to talk to someone about it. I'll talk with
myself, and that works fine for me. There's no one who knows me as good
as I do, so no objections there.

I walked out of class and started the journey towards the next one. Next
class was English class, and I already realize who's going to be there!


END OP CHAPTER 4


-----------------------------
FIRST of all: THANKS for all the reply I've had so far! This is just the
4th installment of te story an yet I seem to have gathered some fan base
already! WOW!
Thank you all to take your precious time to write me.
I would gladly like to hear what Your opinion is in what I posted here.
Feedback and reply will be my main motivation to continue.
This story is going to be posted in multiple chapters.
For everyone who just reads for sex; I'm sorry there is none yet, but
it's coming soon! You bet on it ;)
The story will eventually turn out to be a high school romance, with a
darker side
towards fantasy. Existentialist views are spread around every chapter.
-----------------------------