When I was growing up, I had to put up with all sorts of nasty names being hurled at me by know-it-all bullies. I think I was pretty much called every name in the book. The one name I never got called, however, was fag. Which is pretty ironic considering I am in fact gay.

My name is Jason, I'm fourteen years old and as I said, I am gay. Now I don't think I could precisely say at which time I knew for certain that I was, however it was most likely shortly after my twelfth birthday. Go figure, this also coincided with me having started puberty.

I grew up in a nice home with my parents in Burlington, Ontario. Actually, they aren't my real parents. I was adopted when I was just an infant. I didn't find that out until I was about seven or so. My adopted parents loved me very much, but even so I was never comfortable with going to them with my problems. We didn't discus much more than what we did during the day or what our plans were. Not once did I even think to talk to them about the kinds of things that I was beginning to notice about my body, or about the feelings I had about some of my friends.

I knew that I was gay and I was scared. Not because of what my parents would think of me, but rather of the treatment that I would have to put up with in school. I had seen several other students who were accused of being gay harassed, bullied and even assaulted by some of the students. They didn't last long in my school.

Let me describe myself to you. If you looked at me you would find me to be your typical European stereotype. Blond hair, blue eyes, those type of features. My height is 5' 6" tall and I weigh about 120 pounds. Probably the most striking feature about me are my eyes. I have always been commented about them. Most of the time they are a brilliant dark blue. But, and this is the strangest thing, sometimes they actually shift more into the grey. Someone told me they thought that was because of my moods. I couldn't tell. I never did see them change but one day I saw the difference. For reasons I couldn't explain, the blue color had become less intense and a greyish tinge seemed to dominate my eyes. It was a little freaky. Soon I just accepted it as the way it was. At the same time I started to notice that my hair was also changing, where it once had a golden sheen it now seemed to take on a more subdued tone.

I couldn't wait to finish school I tell you. High School was almost as bad as Elementary School with one big difference however. I ended up running into someone I just couldn't keep my mind off of.

It was during a typical boring Tuesday, I had just gotten out of math class with the other students. I am usually the last one to leave the class as I had the habit of taking all my books and papers to each class with me. Due to all the bullying, I couldn't afford to be caught in any one place at a time.

As I was hurrying out of the room to my next class, I bumped into someone. Literally. Books and papers went flying, and while I was able to keep my balance, the unlucky soul who I ran into ended up falling down on his butt. After I recovered from the shock of running into him, I looked down. My god he was gorgeous! I've always been attracted to guys with red hair, and this poor boy had red hair to spare. He wasn't skinny by any means, but at the same time neither was he fat. He had piercing brown eyes and a face so beautiful that it made roses seem dull by comparison. He was taller than me, towering a whopping 6'. Which was quite surprising to me as, me being 6" shorter, I was able to knock him down. I guess it might have had something to do with the extra 40 pounds of books and paper I carried with me.

After picking my jaw up off the ground I quickly extended my hand. Gratefully, he reached out and allowed me to pulled him up. But rather than letting go, we just stood there, staring at each other. Finally both of us realized where we were and quickly released each other's hand and I helped him to gather the books that he had dropped. I keep all my stuff in a large gym bag, so I didn't loose anything.

"Wh..What's your name?" I stammered while handing him the last book that fell.

"Jon." he replied.

"I haven't seen you around, you new?" I asked.

"Uh huh. I just moved here from New York last month with my Mom."

"Cool, my name's Jason." I could feel my confidence growing as I talked with Jon in the hall. There was something that made me feel so comfortable around him. I was going to be late for my next class, but I didn't care,

"What class do you have next?" I asked him as we started to walk down the hall.

"English, room 207." he replied.

"Cool." I said. "That's where I'm going too. But we'd better hurry, we're already a little bit late."

We rushed down the hall, and into our next classroom. Thankfully, the teacher hadn't started yet. We found two empty seats near the front of the class and we both sat down. I thought it was so neat to be sitting down in the same class as the boy that I had begun to fall in love with. I had a feeling that I wasn't going to learn much in this class today.

The class began and the teacher started to go on about some book that we were going to have to read for a group project. I wasn't really paying attention to the teacher too much. Most of my attention was on Jon. I was also a bit nervous. I mean, I knew that I was starting to fall in love with this kid, but I didn't know how he felt about me. I didn't even know if he was gay like me. I didn't want to do anything that could jeopardise the beginnings of a good friendship by scaring him. I did notice, on a couple occasions when I had looked at him during class, that he was staring at me. But when I looked back at him, he quickly turned his head to look back at the teacher who was still going on about this book project.

The class finished and I was actually quite happy as I gathered my books and papers again. The group project for English class had actually worked out for me as my partner for this project turned out to be Jon. This time I didn't even bother waiting for everyone to leave the room, I quickly finished putting everything in the bag and waited for Jon and we left the classroom together. We both had the next period off for lunch so we walked slowly out of the room and headed for the doors that would bring us to the lower floor and to the lunch room.

Honestly, I wasn't paying much attention to anything else besides Jon and our conversation when all of a sudden I found myself falling face first into the floor. Oh, that really hurt. I turned over and looked up to find myself staring at Paul, my worst nightmare. Paul was the one kid who picked on me constantly since elementary school. He wasn't exactly a bully, but seemed to delight in picking on me whenever he liked. There was no way I was going to give Paul the satisfaction of crying, even though my face was stinging and I could feel blood pouring out of my nose.

"How'd you like you little shit!" Paul laughed at me. "You should have seen yourself. I guess little sissies like you always look like that when they fall. HAHAHA!"

Then something happened that had never happened before. Someone put Paul in his place. And guess who that was. Yup, my new friend Jon. I didn't quite see everything, but one second Paul was laughing his head off and the next thing I knew he was pushed face first into the wall with a strong forearm pressing on the back of his neck. In this position there wasn't much that Paul could do.

"Look asshole! Jay's my friend and I don't like it when scrawny little jerks like you pull shit like that! You go near him again and I'll put you in the hospital buddy. You hear me?" Jon yelled to Paul who definitely wasn't laughing anymore.

Jon released Paul and just stared at him for a bit. Paul turned around and ran down the hall. Jon then turned to me and offered me his hand which I was only too happy to take. He helped me off the floor, wrapped his arm around by shoulders and helped me downstairs.

"Lets get you to the nurse's office to have a look at your face. Who the hell was that kid?"

I really didn't want to talk about it and just shrugged my shoulders. Jon didn't press any further and we made our way to the nurse's office.

I have to say, when we got there, I was a complete mess and the nurse reacted very quickly. He grabbed some paper towels (yes the nurse was male) and started to wipe the blood off my face. He then took a wash cloth ran it under some warm water and cleaned away the rest of the mess that was covering my nose and mouth. Rarely have I needed to go to the nurse's office, but I have to tell you, he looked quite nice. He wasn't a large man, only about 5' 9" tall but he was built. I guess he worked out quite a bit. Not that I was paying too much attention mind you, my face still stung and my nose was very sore. He had brown hair, which was starting to show small streaks of grey.

All the while Jon was standing there beside me, not getting in the way of the nurse, but he wouldn't leave my side.

"Alright young man, what happened?" asked the nurse. His name was Gary.

"I fell on the floor." I replied. I didn't want to mention Paul's name as I knew if I got him into trouble I was just going to pay for it later on.

"He was tripped by some kid in the hall." Jon spoke up. I lowered my head.

"And just who was this 'kid' who tripped you?" Gary asked me.

"It's nothing. Don't worry about it." I said. I wanted to do everything I could to try and avoid having to name Paul. It wasn't that I cared if Paul got into trouble. Secretly, I had fantasies of what I wanted to do to him if I ever had the chance. Usually they involved him on the receiving end of a lot of painful martial arts moves. Too bad I hadn't taken martial arts.

Gary looked at me sternly. "Son, you need to tell me who did this, and I think you know who it was. This isn't just some simple practical joke. By the looks of it, your nose is broken. Now I need you to tell me." I could tell Gary wasn't going to let me off the hook.

"His name's Paul Harris. He has been picking on me since we were both in grade 5." I said with my head held low. I didn't want to look at Jon. I could only imaging the look he must have been giving me. Yeah, lets all look at the little wimp, the kid who's too scared to defend himself. I thought.

"Don't worry Jay," Jon said. "he's not going to pick on you any more if I have anything to say about it."

I looked up at Jon with complete shock on my face. "How can you say that? Look at me. He's right, I'm just this little sissy kid who won't defend himself. How can you want to be near me?" I asked him. Tears began to form in my eyes and I couldn't hold them back.

"Jay. He's wrong. You're a cool guy, you're fun to be with and I like you. Yes I think you should do something to stand up for yourself, but you're my friend, and I'm going to stick by you. I don't like people like that kid today. They make me sick." he responded while placing his hand on my shoulder.

Well that did it, the tears ran free and I started to cry and I grabbed a hold of Jon and hugged him tightly. He didn't try to move away but instead wrapped his arms around me and hugged me back which caused me to cry even harder. We must have stood like that for a good 10 minutes, but I didn't care. I knew for sure at that moment that I loved him with all my heart and would do anything to be with him.

I don't think I have cried that much since I was just a little kid. But I would gladly shed those tears again because they were tears of joy. A feeling I had not had in a long time. Only one thing could make me cry in sorrow at that point, and that would be to find out that Jon didn't love me like I loved him. I didn't want to think about it, instead I decided that I was going to be the best friend I could be to Jon and hope that he felt the same way about me.

The nurse finished up with me and told me that he had called my parents at home to come get me. The rest of the school day was over for me. Jon, unfortunately, had to go back to his classes for the rest of the day.

"Jon, can I have your number? I want to call you when you get off from school." I said to him.

"Sure Jay. Give me your number too. You going to be OK?" he asked to which I nodded yes.

So we traded numbers and he gave me a final quick hug then left Gary's office. Even though Jon had to go to his next class and I couldn't go with him, I was still smiling. I wasn't even thinking about the damage that had been done to my face at that point. All I could think about was Jon. It was a good thing I had the rest of the day off from school. I don't think I would have been able to concentrate on my school work at all.

"Alright Jason, your parents are on the way over and they will be taking you to the hospital so they can look at your face. You hit the floor pretty hard and they need to make sure there isn't any other damage." He said that last part afte he saw my smile turn to a frown. I was hoping that I would just go home and work on my computer like I always do. But I guess that wasn't going to be. I hate hospitals.

I sat in Gary's office for another 5 minutes before my father came rushing into the room. He looked at me and saw the bandage that Gary had put on my nose and the blood that was soaking into my shirt. My father was a fire fighter so he's used to seeing people in worse shape than I was, but I was his son and I could see that he was really concerned about me. He scooped me up from the bench where I was sitting and drew me into a tight hug. I thought I heard his choke back a sob or two when he was holding me but I didn't say anything. It has been a long time since my father hugged me and I really missed it.

"Jason, are you OK? What happened? The nurse told me you had an accident!" My dad said as he finally pushed me from him and held onto my shoulders with his outstretched hands.

"It was Paul, Dad." I told him. "He tripped me in the hall and I fell on my face. I didn't even know he was there."

"Damn! That kid has been picking on you since grade five and I've just about had it with his hijinx." Well that was a surprise to me, my father rarely ever swore in front of me like that.

Just then Gary came into the room where I was waiting and saw my father. "Ah, Mr. Finn! I'm so glad you are here. I have made a copy of my report for you to take with you to the hospital. You will also be happy to know that the student who caused this has been called to the office and will be dealt with properly."

"Thank you. And thank you for taking care of my son. As for this other student, I have had dealings with him and his father before." my father said.

"Oh? From the way you said that I take it you don't think too highly of his father then." Gary responded.

"His father is an alcoholic. The three times that I've had to confront him about his son's behavior he was drunk. I don't understand how a person can be allowed to raise a son when he can't even take care of himself." my father replied, breathing out a heavy sigh at the end.

"Well, I'm sure something can be done. I'll make a copy for the school councilor as well. Maybe she will be able to do something. It almost sounds as if this Paul needs as much of our sympathy as does Jason."

My father thought about that for a second. Funny thing about my father, he's not a vindictive person. Once he gets an apology from someone he goes on as if nothing ever happened. "Perhaps. But I also believe we each must be held accountable for our actions. Blaming them on someone else is not the answer in my opinion." my father said finally.

"I understand and agree with you one hundred percent. I just have a few things for you to sign and then you can take Jason to the hospital." Gary said as he handed my father a pen and pointed to some papers that was on the table in the room. Once my father signed the papers, he and I left the school and headed for the parking lot.

OK, you won't believe this one bit, but my father was on his lunch break when he got the call to come pick me up. Instead of him being in his own car, he was with several workers and they had taken out one of the station's pumper trucks. So guess where I got to sit on the way to the hospital. You guessed it, the front seat of the fire truck that my father rode in on. That was so cool, and if it wasn't for me gaining a new friend, this would have been the single most exciting thing that happened to me all day.

The ride to the hospital wasn't long but I loved every minute of it. I didn't get to use the siren though because that was only to be used when there was an emergency. Once at the hospital, my father and I got out of the truck. I didn't leave empty handed though, one of the other fire fighters gave me one of his hats. It was a baseball type cap with the fire station's emblem on it. I thanked him for the hat and waved as they left the hospital leaving me and my father standing at the entrance. My father put his arm around me and we walked through the doors and into the hospital.

My father and I ended up waiting in the main waiting area for about two hours before a doctor finally came out to take a look at my injury. My father handed him the report that was given to him by the school nurse, Gary, and the three of us headed to one of the rooms just past the reception desk.

After looking at the report and shining a small light into both of my eyes and all that other stuff doctors make you go through, the doctor finally told me to go into the next room over where he got me ready for them to take an X-ray of my head. It only took him a second to take the picture and we just waited for the X-ray to be processed.

I tell you that short time seemed like hours to me. While we were waiting my father asked me to tell him what happened in greater detail.

"Well, Dad, I had just finished English class and I was leaving the classroom with my new friend Jon. We were heading for the doors that led to the stairs to downstairs on our way to the lunchroom when I suddenly lost my footing and fell face first onto the floor. I didn't move for a second as I felt a sharp pain in my nose and my face hurt quite a bit, but when I did look behind me, I saw Paul standing there beside me laughing. I'm just glad that Jon was there with me because he put Paul in his place good!" I said as I started to chuckle.

"What did Jon do Jason?" my father asked me trying to get me to stop laughing.

"Well I didn't see too clearly but I noticed that Paul suddenly stopped laughing and he was being held against the wall with Jon's arm pressing up against the back of his neck. I saw Paul's face and I think it's the first time I ever saw him afraid of something. Jon let him go after telling Paul that he'd better not try anything with me again and Paul took off running. Then Jon helped me up off the floor and we went to the nurse's office." I told him.

My father didn't say anything for a couple minutes, thinking things over in his head a bit, but then he said simply, "Well it's a good thing Jon was there then, and I happy that you made a new friend today. I think I want to see Jon. I want to thank him for helping you out."

"We swapped phone numbers and I'm going to call him later after he gets home from school. Would it be OK if I invited him to come over for a little while?" I asked my father.

"We'll see Jason. It is still a school night and it depends on where Jon lives and also whether or not his parents will let him." my father replied.

"I'm sure they will, and even if he's not too close maybe his parents can drop him off and pick him back up when they want him back home." I said. I wanted to do everything to convince my father to let Jon stay over for a little while.

"We'll see." my father said.

After a few more minutes the doctor came back into the room carrying something. I guessed it was my X-ray. What else could it have been right? Well, I was right. The doctor headed over to a wall and flicked on a switch. Something that looked to me like a wide medicine cabinent without the mirror lit up and the doctor placed my X-ray against it. I thought it was cool because it was the first time I had ever seen an X-ray of my bones. I really couldn't tell what the picture was showing but I did notice something odd where my nose should be on the picture.

"As you can see Mr. Finn, Jason has suffered a slight break in his nose. It's not a serious one and there are no loose fragments so we don't have to do any surgery, but I will have to re-set his nose otherwise it won't heal properly and he will need to have surgery to correct the dislocation. I'm going to be honest, this is going to hurt, but I promise that I will be as gentle as possible." the doctor said.

I looked up at my father worriedly, pain is not one of the things I can handle too well. "Dad?" I said to him, the fear of pain obvious in my voice.

"It's OK son, I'm here." my father said as he stood behind me and held onto my shoulders.

"Now Jason, I need you to sit here on this table facing me. You're nose might start bleeding again, but I will take care of that for you. And remember, I will do this a quickly and as gently as I can, OK?" the doctor said to me in a calm voice. I know he was just trying to make me more comfortable, but I don't think you could have done or said anything that would have prepared me for the pain I was about to experience.

The doctor put his hand up to my nose, his thumb and fingers placed on opposite sides of my nose. Then with a quick movement he jerked on my nose and I heard a crack and felt the extreme pain of my nose as it was shifted back where it was supposed to be. I am not ashamed to admit that I cried right then. I told you, pain is not something I handle too well. Thankfully that was it. My nose did start bleeding again, but the doctor was ready for it as he tilted my head back and gently stopped the blood from running out of my nose.

I stayed like that for a few minutes until the doctor was satisfied that my nose had stopped bleeding. "You did very well Jason. I know that hurt and I'm sorry. But now at least when it heals you won't have to worry about having surgery to correct it." he said smiling at me. He finished up by placing a large bandage on my nose. He said it was to help it stay where it was supposed to be. To me it really looked silly.

My father finished filling out some paper that the doctor gave my father and we left the hospital. On the way out I did turn to the doctor and thanked him for all he did for me. The doctor smiled at me and said "You are welcome Jason. Thats what I'm here for."

Since my father and I came to the hospital in the fire truck, we didn't have a ride back home. But I guess my father had that covered too because a short time afterwards a small red car with the fire station's emblem on the doors stopped in front of us. We both got into the car and it pulled out of the parking lot to take us home.

It was a long day for me and I was really tired. I almost fell asleep in the car but just as I was about to doze off, the car stopped in our driveway and I got out of the car. So there I am with a white bandage covering up most of my nose, wearing the cap I was given by one of my father's co-workers and I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open. One thing kept me awake, though, and that was me thinking about Jon and hoping he would be able to come over to visit.

My mother, who was at home all this time, obviously heard the car pull into the driveway and came rushing out the front door to hug me tightly. She doesn't drive and wasn't able to make it to the hospital. I knew that if she could have, she would have been right there with me at the hospital though. She was hugging me so tightly that I had to push her away a bit or risk getting my nose hurt again.

"Oh Jason, I was so worried! When your school called and told me that you had gotten hurt all I could do was call your father to pick you up. I wanted to be there too you know." she said to me.

"I know mom. Don't worry about it. I'm just really tired right now." I told her.

"OK Jason, you head on up to your room and lay down for a while." she told me.

This would probably be one of those rare occasions where going to bed early didn't get an argument out of me. Besides, I was looking forward to calling Jon when I woke up. I walked into the house, went up the stairs and walked down the hall to my bedroom. Once inside, I closed the door and took off my hat and clothes and set my alarm clock for 4:00pm. That should give Jon plenty of time to get home from school and it gave me a couple of hours of sleep before then.

I don't think I even remember falling into the bed, but I do remember the annoying sound my alarm clock made as it buzzed to wake me up. I really didn't want to get up but then I remembered about Jon and I was up in an instant. I hit the button to turn off the alarm and ran to the bathroom to take a quick shower. I was careful not to get my face wet as the doctor had told me that it could get wet or the bandage would come off. Once the shower was done I went back to my room, got out some good clothes and put them on. The other clothes, which I had just stripped off before I went to bed weren't to be found anywhere in my room so I guessed my mother must have come in and taken them to the wash.

Finally all clean and dressed, I left my room and made my way downstairs to the kitchen where I could use the phone to call Jon. By this time it was about 4:30. My father was sitting at the table reading a paper, as he usually does, and my mother was just starting to make dinner.

"Dad, I'm going to call Jon now and see if he can come over OK?" I asked my dad.

"That's fine Jason, but he can't come over before six o'clock and he has to leave by nine. Remember, it's a school night." my father answered.

"I know dad." I said as I picked up the receiver took out the piece of paper that Jon and given me and dialed the number that was on it. Nervously I waited for someone to pick up on the other end, and after three rings, someone did. Jon.

"Hello?" I heard Jon's voice over the phone.

"Hey Jon. Gary was right, I broke my nose when I fell on my face. It still hurts. The doctor had to put it back into place and I swear it hurt more then than when I broke it to begin with." I told him.

"Ouch, I'm sorry to hear that Jay. I wish I could have been there with you but I had to finish school for the day." Jon said.

"I know Jon. I was wondering though, are you able to come over to visit me for a little while today? I would really like you to come over." I asked him.

"I don't know, hold on a sec..."

I waited for about a minute before he came back on the phone, but to me it seemed like he was gone for at least an hour.

"Yeah, my mom says I can come over for a little while. We have to have dinner first so I would be able to get to your place until about six or so."

"Thats cool, that's when my father said you could come over. We're going to have dinner soon as well. I'm really hungry, I didn't get to eat lunch." I told him.

"Yeah, neither did I, by the time I left Gary's office, I only had about ten minutes left for lunch and I didn't even bother trying to eat. Oh, my mom needs to know where you live, and for that matter so do I if you want me to come over there." he said snickering a bit.

I gave him my address and he told me that it was close enough that he could ride his bike to my house. I was happy for that because I didn't want to have to deal with my parents or his just to give us a ride to each other's homes. After writing the address down he told me he had to go as dinner was done. We both said goodbye to each other and I hung up the phone.

"Well, dear. It looks like you have a new friend. I'm happy for you. You've been spending too much time up in your room lately." my mother said.

I rolled my eyes when she mentioned the amount of time that I spend in my room. Its an old argument we have with each other now and then. "You know how I like the quiet mom. Besides, most everyone else only wants me to be around them when they want something from me. I'm getting really tired of being used like that." I said to her.

My mother didn't say a word after that. I guess she didn't want to get into another long drawn out argument, especially after I had just come back from the hospital. She always was one to have a soft spot for the sick and injured.

Dinner was served and I had to helpings. I usually eat a lot, but thankfully I don't gain the weight like others do. I was done well before six rolled around and I helped my mother with the dishes and went to make sure my room was in order. I normally don't care where I put things in my room, but this time is different. I was about to have someone I loved in my room and I wanted to make a good impression. I was also a bit nervous about him coming over because I didn't know how he felt about me. I knew we were friends, but I wanted more than that and I didn't know how he would take it if I told him that I was in love with him. I decided I was going to have to take it slow and play it by ear.

Then the doorbell rang.