Date: Thu, 24 Feb 2000 22:57:15 CST From: Ari Ryven Subject: Forget About Letting Go: Chapter 19 ============================================================= Chapter 19 ========== I sat down in my room and just stared out my window. Trevor told me that I didn't need to be ready to go until seven, and seeing as it was only 4:30, I had plenty of time to sit around and lactate. My mind was racing, although it wasn't really experiencing any NEW outside stimulii. I thought back and pondered the various reasons as to why we had seen Aaron coming from James' room. Nothing I came up with seemed to make sense. I mean, whenever James even SAW Aaron in school he made some derrogatory remark, and more often than not, lunged at him like he was going to hit him. I thought back to one time that I came around the corner to see James chest to chest with Aaron, walking him backwards to a corner and whispering something in his ear. To say that aaron looked slightly uncomfortable was not only an understatement, but a great one at that. James backed off and shoved Aaron against the wall. I just stopped and stared for a minute, before James turned around, slung his arm over my shoulder and guided me to the metal building to get "tall" as he liked to put it. I remember asking James what he was doing and he just remarked on how he was instilling the fear of God in Aaron. "God hates Fags." He'd say. So, seeing Aaron in James' room just DIDN'T MAKE SENSE! I brooded over that until I realized that it was a quarter after six, and went to get ready. After an hour and a half of being in deep thought over the whole situation I still didn't have any answers, and as I moved on into the bathroom to get ready, my mind wandered even further and I realized I still had no clue what Aaron meant by saying that we'd talk later tonight. What was that supposed to mean? No sooner had I asked myself that question, when Trevor burst into the bathroom! "TREVOR! GOD!" I exclaimed in surprise, slamming the shower stall door completely shut. "God, Josh, have an aneurysm! I just stopped by to check up on you. I figured you'd still be sitting around moping." "What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, shutting off the water. I reached my hand out and beckoned for a towel from Trevor. I waited and no towel. "Dammit gimme a towel!" "Josh, It's RIGHT THERE across the wall from the shower, just get out and get it ya big baby." He said, giggling. GOD he could be such an ASSHOLE! I stepped out and blindly reached for a towel, only to see Trevor dangling it in front of me at the door to the bathroom. He just stood there and giggled, and I SWEAR! I SWEAR he was looking me up and down! "Trev, I'm not in the mood man, just give me the towel..." I whined. He was right, I guess I had been moping, and was still kind of crabby. Normally I would've chased him down and wrestled the towel away from him, buck-ass naked or not. "Uhhh, I'm thinkin......NO!" He laughed and turned, running for my room. I gaped at him for a moment, before chasing after him. He ran down the hallway and shut and locked my door. I beat on the door for a minute or two, before I realized that if one really wanted in my room, all they had to do was forcefully bump into it. Locked or not the damn thing would pop open. I rammed my hip into the door, and charged in, lunging at trevor who was directly across the room, and we began giggling and wrestling for my towel on the bed. I'm not sure if it was all the friction or what, but the inevitable happened, and during our match my cock became hard as a rock. "My god, Josh, can't you control that thing?" Trevor said looking down at my crotch, while trying to pin me down. I froze in shock that he realized it, and he flipped me over on my back, dropped the towel on my face, then got off of me. I just laid there. Too embarassed to move. As he got up though, he gave my cock a hearty squeeze, which as embarassed as I was, I moaned softly. He giggled, and I started to sit up but he put his hand on my chest, and made me stay there. I lay back down on the bed, half-fearing, half-fantasizing about what would happen next. He reached up with his other hand and made sure the towel was completely covering my face, and eyes. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE? Fear wracked my body, but I was so turned on, at the thought of my BEST FRIEND initiating some kind of weird sexual THING that I started dripping like crazy. I whimpered when the hand drifted further down my torso and ran circles around my belly button. Trevor, through stifled giggles, choked out, "Just lay back, and relax bro. Enjoy yourself." He removed the hand from my head and turned, I tried to sit up and protest, but he just pushed me back down. "Trev..." I mumbled, from under the sheet in protest. "Shhhh...." Then he leant forward by my ear and whispered, "I told you you were going to have fun tonight. Then he sat back down on the bed beside me and lifted his hand momentarily. Only to replace it again and he rubbed circles on my belly. It felt soooo good, to have someone I knew I loved, and that would never leave me making me feel that way. This was so uncharacteristically like Trevor, that it scared me, but I was far too horny, and so I laid there and revelled in the feelings he was giving me. I couldn't see what was going on, I could only hear, and feel. I swore that I caught a whiff of Cool Water cologne, but I tried to dismiss it from my mind. Then I realized, Trevor doesn't wear Cool Water. Weird. The thought quickly slipped my mind as a pair of lips grazed my right nipple, I moaned loudly, and this must've fueled him that much more, because in an instant he wrapped his lips around my tender nub, and began to suck and nibble..."Oh god, Trev..." I moaned as the pleasure grew to new levels. His ministrations on my belly soon wandered furter down, and his fingers found their way into my bush. Trevor took his free hand and lifted the towel, up just enough to where my lips were uncovered. He slowly raised his head off of my nipple, with some hesitation, then licked and kissed his way up to my chin. He was getting me so close to an earth-shattering orgasm and he hadn't even really TOUCHED MY COCK! I had to give it to him, for a straight best friend, he was damn good! He ran his tongue along my jaw line and I moaned again and again, I writhed on the bed, squirming and wiggling. His hand moved from my bush to my balls, and he squeezed, and fondled them, turning me on more than I had ever been before. He slipped his free hand under my neck, and pulled me into a kiss. Not just any kiss, this was more passionate, than ANY and I do mean ANY kiss I had ever shared with anyone, even Aaron. The smell of cool water cologne filled my nostrils as our tongues searched and explored each others mouth. I couldn't take the sitting still anymore. I searched with my right hand and found my treasure. Covered in denim was the cock I'd thought to be totally untouchable for the longest time. I massaged Trevor through his jeans, and he let out a soft moan. "Oh god Josh!" I smiled through our kiss, and then it hit me. Trevor has a deeper voice than that. It all came crashing together, and I guess they realized it. His hand moved away from my cock, and he propped himself up then sat up. He used his other hand to brush my cheek, and he removed the towel. As everything came into focus, my eyes fell not upon Trevor. No, of course not! Aaron sat there, smiling back at me. "Ummm, hi." He blushed and looked down at the floor. My mouth dropped open and I just sat there in shock. HOW THE HELL DID AARON GET THERE? WAS I DREAMING? I sat straight up in my bed, and looked around bewildered. What the- Then I saw Trev come back in my room from the hallway, laughing his ass off. I looked from him, to aaron then back. I wasn't sure whether I should be greatful, or outraged. Trev set this whole thing up! Outrage will do just fine! "YOU BASTARD!" I screamed getting up and running to my closet, scurrying to get dressed, as if they hadn't yet seen me naked. "God JOSH!" Trevor yelled back, angrily. "No Trevor! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?" I was pissed. My best friend betrayed me! I wasn't sure why it bothered me so bad. Was it pissing me off because it WASN'T Trevor? Or was it just bothering me because it was so outrageous? "Why in the fuck would you wanna do something like that?" "Josh..." A timid voice came from behind me. I wheeled around to face Aaron, and seeing him there stole every breath I'd ever taken away. He was wearing a deep purple crushed velvet dress shirt, revealing a great portion of the smooth tan skin of his chest, As well as a pair of tight fitting black levi jeans. He looked good enough to eat, and to think if I wasn't so fucking stupid I could be doing that right now! UGH! My anger began to dissipate, and fade away to nothingness. AARON'S HANDS AND LIPS WERE JUST ALL OVER MY BODY! "I'm sorry...it's my fault, man. I just wanted....I just-" "No, it's alright." I said in defeat as a big smile spread across my face. I walked over and hugged him tightly. "Thank you," I whispered as I leaned back and looked him in the eyes, before giving him a quick kiss on the lips. "What about me?" Trevor asked, with a laugh. "You expect me to kiss you, after what you just pulled?" I walked over to Trev and gave him a huge hug and peck on the cheek. I stepped back and he was grinning from ear to ear. "Come on you two, let's go get Becky." And with that he turned to walk out the door. But not before adding, "But if you ask me to let you listen to that goddamned Judy Garland CD again, you're gettin out and walkin Aaron!!!" Trevor laughed as the three of us walked out and got into the explorer. *KNOCK* *KNOCK* "HUH?!? Trev, what was that?" I asked, as I slammed the door to the explorer, and getting in the backseat with Aaron. *Knock* *Knock* *KNOCK* "Let me in Josh! The door's locked!" "What?!? What are you talking about? What door?" I asked giving Trev an incredulous look. *BAM!* "Dammit Josh, get the fuck up! It's 7:15! We're gonna be late for the movie!" Trevor yelled as he burst through my bedroom door. WAITAMINUTE WAITAMINUTE WAITAMINUTE? HOW DID WE GET BACK IN MY BEDROOM? "How the hell did we get back in here?" I asked in a raspy, sleep ridden voice as I got up out of the floor, wiping sleep from my eyes. Slowly, it donned on me that I had fallen asleep in my floor and .... GOD DAMMIT! DAMMIT ALL TO HELL! IT WAS JUST A DREAM! "What are you fucking talking about, man?" Trevor asked with a look of "OH MY GOD YOU'RE SO FUCKING WEIRD SOMETIMES!", plastered to his face. "Well, one minute we were out in the explorer, and we were going to get becky....aaron was in the backseat, and-" I stopped in mid-sentence. GET A GRIP JOSHUA! IT WAS JUST A DREAM! "Never mind, just let me get dressed." "Dude, we don't got time, slap on some shoes and let's go! Besides, we still have to pick up becky and aar-" Trevor stopped, and turned away, cursing under his breath. "Aaron? Aaron's coming with us?" I asked, as things started to make sense, and I realized that Trev, Becky and Aaron must have set this night up. "Josh, just forget about it man, come on...You'll figure it out when we get to the coffee house..." "Coffe House? What the fuck are you talking about? You and Becky set this whole thing up didn't you? I can handle my own relationships without you around to fuck everything up...You can just go without me, alright? I don't need your fucking help, or becky's lil "I'm gonna fix these two up" attitude, or Aaron's apathy!" I screamed, suddenly outraged at the fact that they had conspired against me. "I just need to be left the fuck alone!" I yelled, pushing him out of my doorway and slamming the door shut. "MOTHER FUCKER!" Trevor cursed from the other side of the door before shoving it right back open in my face. He charged towards me and grabbed me up by the collar of my shirt. "You listen to me Josh! I am SORRY that we had to hide this shit from you, but Becky has really been on my case lately, because Aaron isn't happy, and you're not happy, and he's not talking. Neither are you. We just wanted you two to get together and hang out for a bit and see if things can change. Because we both miss our best friends. OK?!? If that's still too much for you to handle then I'm sorry...I was just trying to be your fucking friend! So you just go ahead and crawl into your bed and bawl or do whatever it is you've been doing lately, whine like a little bitch! I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!!! I JUST DON'T FUCKING CARE! I really really can't stand Aaron, but I got past that, and tried to set you two up, because I KNOW he would make you happy..." He stood there, looking me in the eyes for a moment before lightening his grip on me. Then he threw me backwards onto my bed, leaving me in shock. I heard him slam the front door, and a few seconds later heard him screech out of my driveway. What the fuck had I done? I just went off on my best friend in the world because he was worried about me and wanted to try and make me happy. I knew I'd been a little bitch for the past month, he was right about that. I knew that I'd changed....and not necessarily for the better. But had I become so cold and bitter that they felt I need a helping hand? "Man, FUCK THEM!" I screamed, as I fell into a violent rage, that consumed my whole being and I started tearing around my room...I picked up a Death's head statuette from my bookshelf and flung it at my wall shattering it into thousands of little pieces. And as though that statuette were my soul, I too shattered, and fell to my floor, bawling. 'GAWD Josh, could you *BE* more predictable?' I shunned myself as I lay there in near hysterics, crying for no apparent reason. One thing was for damn sure, I definitely had some major ass-kissing to do. *********************************************************** *RING* *RING* *RING* I sat up bewildered, and my eyes darted around the room. I saw the statue laying on the floor a few feet away and looked down at my left arm when I felt a sharp pain. I had cut myself on one of the pieces of the statue. What the fuck is up with this? I just get better and I go and hurt myself again.... I got up, and walked out into the living room to grab the cordless, cradling my arm as best I could to try and make it stop hurting. "Hello?" I whinced as I pulled a piece of the clay statuette from my arm. "Hel- Hi, Josh." "Aaron. What do you want?" I asked coldly. "Listen, Trevor told me what happened, I'm coming over...I just wanted to make sure you were there. Don't go anywhere." "No, Aaron, I don't want-" *CLICK* "YOU LITTLE BITCH!" I screamed angrily at the phone as he hung up. I shut it off and threw it into the chair, and turned to go to the bathroom to clean up the cuts on my arm. As if this day couldn't possibly get any worse; now I get to have yet another fight, this time with Aaron. I thought back to the first fight we had, the last time he and I were actually even hanging out. Gawd, that was a month ago. I sure did have a funny way of showing people I wanted them. I picked out the last few pieces of the statuette, and looked around for some kind of bandages, before realizing that we didn't keep anything like that in the house. I swear, sometimes my mother must think I'm immortal or something. She hadn't really been home much since thanksgiving, and I'm not gonna lie and say I missed her, but damn, she could at least go shopping often enough to get some band-aids or something. I went to my room and put on my shoes, so I could go over to Judy's and get something to cover up the cuts. I grabbed my cigarettes off of my dresser, and lit one up as I walked out the backdoor to go to Judy's. As I stepped around the backside of the house, I saw that Trevor's explorer was in the driveway. "FUCK!" I cursed to myself as I debated on whether or not I still wanted to go over there. I looked down at the cuts on my arm which were still bleeding and realized it was either go over there or keep bleeding. So, I evaluated my priorities and decided that I had some old towels in the house which I could use to stop the bleeding. I finished my cigarette and walked back inside and got some old washcloths from under the sink and held them to the cuts. "Ahh MOTHER FUCKER!!!" I cried in pain as I discovered yet ANOTHER piece of my shattered statuette in my wound. "Want some help with that?" "Oh MY GOD! What the fuck?!?" I jumped in surprise at the intruder. I turned to see Aaron, looking as beautiful as ever smilingly warmly at me. His smile faded a bit when he took in my attitude I s'pose. What is going on here? He's happy that I'm in pain? Aaron, stepped closer and raised the washcloth from my arm to look at my cuts and when he saw them, he winced. "Jesus H. Christ Josh, what did you do this time?" He looked up at me incredulously and then back to my cuts. He tried to uncover them again but I stopped him. "Aaron, please... Back off." I pushed him back out of the doorway so I could walk into my bedroom. "What do you want?" I asked coldly, sitting down in my reading chair. I turned to the doorway, where he stood, looking around my room without moving. "Well.... Josh.... I came here to ask you out....To dinner I mean." He said nervously. He had cast his eyes upon my floor, and noticed some shards of the statue lying in the floor. He bent down and started picking them up, then looked up at me and grimaced. "You didn't like what Trev and Becky were doin either I take it?" "No Aaron." What does he mean, EITHER? *HE* was involved...wasn't he?!? "You mean, you didn't know about the movies either?" ============================== Not thebest way to end a long overdue chapter... I know ... I'm sorry for the absurd delay in release. Hope yall can forgive me. All comments are welcome @ forgetaboutlettinggo@hotmail.com Thanx alex!