Date: Thu, 19 May 2005 19:38:37 EDT
From: Madasonaysha@aol.com
Subject: The Handsome Jewish Young Man chapter 5

Gay male - High School Gay male - Interracial

Disclaimer : See first chapter

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a while ; )

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"THE HANDSOME JEWISH YOUNG MAN"
                       By Maddy A.

                                                   PART FIVE :
CONVERSATIONS?


We were sitting comfortably in silence watching the television.
Occasionally we would kiss, but no words were exchanged.  I was relaxing
in his arms about to drift off from the combination of his warmth and the
light drizzle against the windows when I heard the front door open with a
loud creak.  It took a second for me to realize my folks were home and
having them walk in and seeing me and Victor snuggled up together
wouldn't be very wise.  He must have gotten the message before I did
because as I was getting up he was already off the couch and heading
towards the kitchen.  The bastard ran out on me.

"Look at this sofa!"  My mother yelled as she and my father came
in.  They were even more drenched than Victor and I were.  My mothers
long curly light brown hair fell limply against her face and my fathers
short black hair shined with specks of water glistening from the low
light of the lamps.

"Sorry mom, we'll dry it."  I responded, hopping I didn't
look too guilty.  She could almost always tell when I had done something
I shouldn't have.   When I was younger, I could never get away with
ANYTHING.  One look from her and she could tell when I did something
bad.  Not that I thought what me and Victor did was bad, but I didn't
think she would approve of her only son making out on her `very
expensive leather couch' with his tall, black friend.  Some how I
didn't think she would be happy for us.

"You can't dry it!  Go get a paper towel to dry it off!"  She
stated.

"I thought you just said that it couldn't be dried?"  I asked
and judging from the glare that she gave me that wasn't the most wise
thing to do.

"It's leather, you can't dry it, but you can wipe off that
water."  She continued as she started tapping her foot impatiently.
I hated when she did that.

"But, you just said--"  I started, but was cut off by my father.

"Kyle, God damn it, just listen to your mother!"  He screeched as
he kicked off his wet, mud-covered sneakers.  I could hear Victor
rustling around in the kitchen trying to go unnoticed, but he wasn't
doing a good job with his slamming of the cabinets as he rifled for a
snack.  The coward had left me alone to deal with my parents while he was
trying to feed his stomach.  The Bastard!  But, what a cute one he was.

"Sorry..."  I mumbled as I made my way into the kitchen to grab
some paper towels.  I hated how my father made me feel.  Over all we got
along, but sometimes when he would talk to me, it would frustrate me.  It
felt like he didn't understand me.  It was like one day we would be
fine, but then he would fuck everything up by saying some dumb shit.  He
was always butting in where he shouldn't.   Victor watched  with
smiling eyes as I passed him.  I was annoyed by the fact that he was
hiding out in the kitchen  while I had to deal with my parents.  He
looked amused with a half cocked grin on his face, but I wasn`t.  I
rolled my eyes at him, but when he shot me a wink my irritation was
replaced by amusement.

"Real nice....leaving me alone to deal with them!  You know you so
suck right now!"  I hissed at him, but couldn't suppress the
smile that crept across my face.

"Sorry, I'm not good at lying."  He shrugged and chuckled as
he handed me a spoon.  I looked at his curiously.

"A spoon?"  I asked skeptically and he continued to smile, making
the small dimple in his left cheek deepen.

" I don't know, I just wanted to give you something to distract
you before I did this." He replied and looked into the hall and then
back at me with a brighter smile; if that was even possible.

"Distract me from wh---"  I was cut off by a quick kiss.  It was
over before it really began, but it was enough to silence me into
contentment.

"Are you crazy?  My parents are right in the living room!"  I
hissed,  half amused and half afraid, but all he did was laugh and walked
with me back into the living room;  bag of potato chips in hand.

"Victor are you staying over or do you want me to drive you
home?"  My father asked and I answered for him.

"He's gonna crash here."  I replied and Victor looked
slightly bothered.

"Naw, Mr. Schultz  I can't.  I have a job interview in the
morning so I should go home in a little while."  My father smiled and
told him to be ready in an hour.  I dragged Victor up to my room, making
sure to shut and lock the door.  I was a little hurt that he didn't
want to sleep over.

"What the hell?"  I asked and with a look of annoyance mirroring
his.

"Relax yourself for a minute."  He replied with his face
softening as he sat down on my bed.  I ran my hands through my slightly
curling hair and sat by him.

"Why don't you want to stay?  I thought we could, you
know....talk about shit."  I had calmed down some and my irritation
was replaced by curiosity.  He took one of his hands and placed them in
mine and smiled.

"It's not that I don't want to, I can't.  I was telling
the truth."

"Well, why did you look so mad when I told my folks you would stay
here?"  He looked pensively at me and continued to smirk.
"What?"

"You are so sensitive."  He stated as he laughed.  I rolled my
eyes at him, that familiar feeling of irritation once again traveling
through my body.

"No, I'm not!  I just thought we could talk about...you
know...us?" I replied and Victor's look grew serious.  A feeling
of dread washed over me.

"Look, I liked what.....you know....me and you did, but I don't
want to talk about it right now." He stated nervously.  I took some
solace with the fact, that I wasn't the only one on edge.

"That's the thing, I liked it to, but we need to figure some
things out."

"Like what!" He stated a little too roughly and loud for my
liking.

"Oh, I don't know?  Maybe just what the hell we are doing with
each other.  I mean, yesterday we were just friends, but now things
are.....there just not the same."  I couldn't find the right
words to say.  They were inside my head, but when it came to formulating
them to my mouth, nothing came out.  I wanted to explain to him how much
I liked him.  I wanted to figure out what his feelings for me were and
what we were to each other.  Were we going to be boyfriends? Friends with
benefits?  It was like I had all the words inside my head, but when it
came to actually getting them out.......nothing happened.

"I don't want to talk about that!"  Victor yelled again and
began to pace around my room.  He stopped at my desk and picked up a
picture frame.  The corners of his mouth were curled up into a smile that
he was trying to suppress.  He was looking at a photo of the two of us
that Jimmy had taken the first day Victor had came over.  That was the
day they met and we officially had cleared the air about some of each
other's assumptions. I started to feel nervous the more he looked at
it because it was more like he was gazing at it.  I was slightly
embarrassed that he had found it.  I mean, come on, how embarrassing is
it to have someone you've been crushing on find their photo in your
bedroom.  I wanted to play it cool and make it seem like I liked him, but
not TOO much, but that god damn photo was proof that I had liked him more
than I was willing to let on.  I walked across the room and snatched the
frame out of his hands.  I looked up at him, ignoring the smile he was
giving me.

"What?" I asked him sarcastically as I fought to keep the smile
of my face; it was just so freaking hard to!  Damn!  He was standing
there with his baggy white t-shirt still damp from the rain.  Water was
trapped in his braids and the ends of them were curling into little
loops.  I wanted to reach out my hand and twirl the curly hair in them
playfully, but I stopped myself.  It was easy to get lost in his tea
colored eyes so I had to look away as I placed the photo face down on the
desk.

"Nuthin, I just think it's nice you have my picture by your
bed."  He stated as he teasingly pushed my shoulder.  His touch was
electric and I could feel heat traveling to my cheeks.  I continued to
look away without commenting.  I hated how I  was feeling, but oh how I
loved it!  It was like I was embarrassed, but I wasn't ashamed about
that.  As intimidating as he could be from looks alone, knowing the type
of person that he was made me feel at ease with him.  It was just
knowing, that he knew, just how much I liked him...I don't
know....it was just a little scary.  What was more scary was the fact
that I didn't know what his feelings for me were.  I mean hell, it
was obvious that he liked me, but I wasn't sure if he liked me as
much as I did him.

"It wasn't by my bed and that's besides the point.  I still
want to talk."  I replied as I attempted to steer the conversation in
another direction.

"Whateva.  Shoot...what's on your mind."  He said as he
folded his arms across his chest and looked down at me.  He may have only
been four or five inches taller, but the look he was giving me made me
feel much smaller.  The heat was still traveling along my neck and
cheeks, but I pushed that feeling away.  I wanted to find out just what
we were doing and what it was going to mean.

"Us, that's what I want to talk about."

"What do you mean "us"?"  He asked and started to rock
back and forth on his feet.

"You know what the hell I mean!"

"Fine, what ever... I like you and you like me....what else is
there to talk about?"

"Exactly that!  I like you and you know what the means...that
I'm like......you know...."  I trailed off.  I had never
admitted to anyone that I was gay and for unknown reasons, I was finding
it hard to say that word out loud.

"Yeah, I got that part.  Me too.."  He said and trailed too.  I
got the feeling that he was feeling just like I was.

"So...what does that mean? Are we like....dating...or
something?"

"Would you stop flipping that damn thing!"  Victor stated
annoyed.  I didn't even realize that I was playing with the picture
frame until Victor covered my hands with his to stop me from flipping
it.  Heat rose from my legs on upward at the feeling of his hand on
mine.  His thumb gently began to caress the top of my hand for a brief
moment before he folded his arms back across his chest defensively.

"Your deflecting from the situation."  I replied as I turned my
back from him and began pacing around the room.  Our little talk
wasn't going as smoothly as I had hoped.  All these thoughts started
going through my head.  I was thinking that he obviously didn't like
me as much as I liked him and that thought bothered me.  I seriously felt
like I could be falling in love.  For a month and a half I had gotten to
know him and he was just full of surprises.  He may have appeared to be
one way, but his clothes, his hair and even his attitude didn't
properly reflect the wonderful person that he was.  I'm not a very
spiritual person although my parents are.  I hate going to temple! It so
DAMN BORING!  Rabbi Shallot makes me fall asleep with every word that
comes out his old mouth and it was SO hard to follow what he says.   I
didn't understand a lick of Hebrew, to me it sounded like gibberish.
It wasn't that I'd never tried, it was just I never could grasp
it.  All the words mixed up and confused the shit out of me so I gave
up.  Jimmy would tell me all the time that I was a  "Very Bad
Jew".  I would just laugh and tell him he was worse off than me.
Shit,  he would drink a glass of milk with a ham sandwich!  But, Victor
was very close with God even though he told me his mother wasn't very
religious.  Don't get me wrong, he wasn't a bible toting freak or
anything crazy like that, but he told me that whenever he was going
through a rough time, he would have talk to God.  I'll admit it, I
was a little freaked when he said that.  I mean come on, somebody comes
out and tells you that they have "conversations with God"
wouldn't you think something was a little off with them?  He must
have saw the wary look I gave him because he laughed and began to explain
himself.  He said that sometimes life just gets so stressful and whenever
things start to get too crazy, he takes out a minute and just...talks to
God.  He said it gave him clarity and I admired that.  The more I would
be around him and see how spiritual he was, the more I started to wonder
more about my faith.  For so many  years I was just like....Jew...so
what? Its hard to explain it, but I never really had this need to get in
touch with my roots.  But, seeing how Victor was made me want to learn
more about my faith and heritage.

"AYE!! Your right.  I don`t know man.....what do you want me to
say?"  He asked, inadvertently startling me from my reverie.  I had
gotten so caught up in my thoughts, that I had spaced out.

"It's not what I want  YOU to say, it's what I want to say.
I just want to know what exactly we're doing with each other.  I
mean, are we dating...or something else?"

"I don't know?" He said dejectedly and my heart broke a
little.  It started off as a small crack that was quickly spreading,
burning with each tear that it made.  I turned my face away from his and
tried to pretend that I was fine.  I told myself that I should have
expected that and should have been prepared, but I wasn't.  I was so
sure that he liked me.  I was so sure that he was ready to declare his
undying love for me.  I was so ready to start making plans to adopt
little Chinese babies.  Okay, maybe I was getting a little ahead of
myself, but I at least expected him to at least say we were dating.

"What don't you know?"  I asked with my back still turned
away from him.  I was silently praying that he would say the words I
wanted to hear.

"I don't know what to do?"  He replied and I was truly
confused.  I was expecting him to say he didn't know if he liked me.
I was ready to hear that he didn't know if he was gay or that he
didn't know if he wanted to freaking wear shorts or sweats the next
day.  I was ready for almost anything except that.

"I don't understand you?"  I said as I turned to face him for
the first time.  He was deep in thought and I almost felt guilty for
disturbing him with my words.  He walked over and surprised me as he
embraced me in a hug.  I could smell the faint scent of coconuts in his
hair and the warmth of his strong dark honey arms relaxed me, almost
making some of the confusion leave......almost.  His voice was gentle
and whispery as he spoke softly in my ear.

"I'm gonna keep it real.  I don't know if I can do
this--" He started and I broke the embrace and glared at him.

"FINE! FUCK YOU VIC!  IF YOU DON'T WANT TO DO THIS THEN WHY THE
HELL DID YOU KISS---"  I started to yell, but something silenced me.
At first, I wanted to pull away.  I wanted to curse him out and let him
know just how fucking fucked I thought he was, but I couldn't.
Victor's lips were soft and warm.  They were a little fuller than
mine, but they fit together perfectly.  His tongue snacked out and gently
started licking my lower lip.  I brought my tongue out to stroke his,
mimicking his actions.  Tenderly our mouths joined together as our
tongues would timidly touch each other.  I kept my eyes open at first; he
had caught me by surprise, but soon I closed my eyes as I relaxed under
our kiss.  It was our second one and just as good as the first.  He ran
his hands roughly through my hair, locking and twisting when he reached
the back of my head, pulling my face closer to his and pressing our
bodies close together.  His aggressiveness turned me on and I could feel
myself hardening.   I roamed my hands underneath his t-shirt to touch his
bare skin for the first time.  His body was smooth and rough contrasting
in a subtle way.   Unlike mine, he was formed with a naturally muscular
build and with each touch of every groove and arch in his body, the heat
I was feeling grew.  He was an eager kisser, but I was a little more
timid.  I had only kissed one other person and I wasn't sure of my
abilities, but he didn't seem to mind so I thought I was doing a good
job at keeping pace.  His hands began to roam up my shirt, gently
caressing my back.   His fingers lingered and danced up my spine and just
as I was about to suggest we make ourselves more comfortable on the bed
he pulled away.

"What I was GOING to say was I don't know what to do about how I
feel about you.  I want to be wit you , but do you want to be wit
me?"  He asked cautiously and I smiled. I started to feel a little
embarrassed at how I overreacted.  My mother was always telling me my
mouth was going to get me in trouble and I really should have started
listening to her.

"HELL YEAH!  I mean, yeah...."  I replied.  He kissed me quickly
before he smirked at me and wiggled his eyebrows.  He glanced down and
his face lit up with laughter.  I followed his gaze and saw that I
was....lets just say a little MORE than excited.  Those God Damn khaki
shorts don't hide ANYTHING!  His clothes were a little too baggy for
me to see if his situation was the same, but I got the feeling that it
was.

"So....it's on then?" He asked.

"Yeah, its on...."  I replied and smiled back at him.  Little
did I know just how complicatedly interesting our lives were about to get
with those three little words.........


                                           To Be Continued

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Copyright 2005