Thank you for all your comments on the last chapter, you have all encouraged me to carry on with the story. I still need feedback, so I know that you still like the story.
I have now set up a Yahoo Group that you can go on to chat to other readers, post messages in the message board and read new chapters before they appear on Nifty.
>>From Chapter 3
"Hi Josh," he took me by surprise. Oh my god oh my god! He doesn't have a clue that I know his deepest secret. 'Got to keep calm got to keep calm', I kept telling myself. It was no use...
"But, you don't look it; you're a very sporty person. Sporty people can't be gay, can they?" I tried, I really did try but I couldn't get the thoughts out of my head and before I could stop myself I blurted everything out. Shaun went red as soon as I had finished. He looked like as if he was going to cry, damn I was going to cry. If this is true then all my dreams have come true but just one problem. He doesn't love me, he loves Kelly.
Shaun turned around and run off. I decided that I shouldn't run after him because he has to make the next move. Shaun left all his books in the classroom. I had to make up some excuse about Shaun feeling ill and went to see the nurse. Mr. Rogers didn't seem to believe it, but he carried on with the lesson.
As usual the lesson was boring and didn't take anything in. Just as I was about to leave Shaun came back. He didn't look at me at all, he just came in collected his books and left. Mr. Rogers was still talking about exams and coursework. He could keep anyone talking all day.
I rushed out of the class room and Shaun practically jumped out at me. He scared the shit out of me.
"Josh, can we go somewhere to talk please?" he asked me quietly, probably not wanting anyone to overhear us. I knew what he wanted to talk about and I have questions that I wanted to ask him but, he needs to start it off first.
"Yeah, sure. We can go to the Library it looks like it was closed this morning." I had a free period now anyway so we could spend as much time as we wanted talking, We didn't speak to each other all the way there. I could tell that he was uncomfortable and I didn't know what to do or say to make him feel better. Maybe if I told him that I am gay, he might feel more comfortable, but I want to know what he has to say first.
It seemed like an hour, but actually it was only five minutes. When we eventually got there, the library was still closed and unlocked so we could go to the back where there are comfortable seats to sit on.
Shaun took a few seconds to gather his thoughts and began
"This isn't very easy for me to talk about because I have never spoken about it to anyone before. I realised that I am gay about two months ago, but thinking about it I have been all my life, it has been staring at me in the eyes, but just never understood it."
I can understand where he is coming from because it was exactly the same for me and we realised roughly about the same time.
"You won't tell anyone will you?" he continued, "I'm not ready yet to tell people especially my closest friends"
"Shaun, I will never tell anyone without asking your permission first." I wasn't lying to him. I won't tell Jo yet because this is a big shock for me. There was an uncomfortable silence because none of us knew what to say next.
After what seemed like forever, he broke the silence. "So, I guess you know I like Kelly then?" he asked. This was a stupid question because he already knows that I know. I decided that this would be a good place to tell him that I am also gay.
"Yeah and you certainly have excellent taste!" I wasn't exactly sure that I had done the right thing at first because he gave me a strange look, which I couldn't read, but then his expression changed. I could tell that he wasn't shocked, but a bit surprised.
"Oh, so you like him too huh?" he said punching my shoulder playfully. "Yeah, a bit." Well, what else could I say? Kelly is very attractive, but I think there is a bit more to it than what Shaun is making out because he wouldn't have written it in his book otherwise.
"Shaun, how much do you like Kelly?" I decided to push him a bit further. I thought it might have been that He had said previously that he has never talked about his sexuality with anyone else before, so he couldn't have told Kelly how he feels.
"Have you ever considered telling him how you feel?" I said cautiously. "I have thought a few times before of how to tell him, but I'm not sure how he would react."
I can see his point, I mean I used to think of ways I could tell Shaun how I feel about him, but could never do it because I couldn't guess his reaction. He decided to turn the question on me.
"So Josh, you know who I like, who do you like?"
Oh no, what can I say? This is my perfect opportunity to tell him, but there's no point now because he doesn't think of me that way.
"I just remembered that I have to collect some photocopies from Mr. Thomas", I lied. Mr. Thomas is my electronics teacher. I had to come up with some excuse not to answer his question. I don't want to lie to him. "Wait here, and I will be back in five minutes."
I went out of the library and just leaned against the wall for a few minutes, wondering what to say to him when I went back in.
When I went back in he looked a lot happier than he did in business studies this morning. I hope him being open with me means we can spend more time together.
"So, what about your parents, have you considered telling them yet?" I said changing the subject, hoping that he had forgotten about his previous question.
"Not really. Telling my parents isn't at the top of my list. I mean, I know someday I will have to tell them, but for now they are happy not thinking about my sex life.
"Yeah, same 'ere."
"You still haven't answered my question, who do you like?"
Shit! He hasn't forgotten. I can't give him another excuse. I'm going to have to tell him but, I know he doesn't feel the same way. Fortunately the bell had just rung.
"I have to go, I have electronics now. Talk to you later." I lied again. I was, in fact, free for the rest of the day.
"Ok, speak to you later. Bye." He seemed disappointed with me leaving and I hated lying to him, but I couldn't tell him that I fancied him either. I caught the next service bus home so that I wouldn't bump into him.
I had completely forgotten to let Jo know before I went home. The phone started ringing and I answered it.
"Hey Josh. Where were you today? I was waiting for ages after school."
"Sorry, I was really tired after business studies. You know what Mr. Rogers is like. I just forgot to tell you before I went, Sorry"
"Hmmm, I suppose I'll forgive you this once! Anyway, I'll let you get on because me and mum are cooking tonight, see you tomorrow, bye hun"
"Ok, see you later."
Well, that's chapter 4.
I now a Yahoo!Group that I will be posting
the chapters on before they are posted on Nifty. There is a message board and a
chat room on there as well.
Click Here (http://uk.groups.yahoo.com/group/highschool_love_story/)
Give me feedback and suggestions...good or bad.