This is not a quick suck and fuck story. It's about a relationship between 2 underage teens. If this material offends you than wtf are u doing on nifty anyways. Well yeah, common disclaimer.

It Must Be Nice To Disappear: Chapter 1

Its not that I was a nerd. In fact I was far from it. I was everything a typical highschool kid should be. I was athletic, smart, funny, and popular. Well at least I made it seem that way. If my friends knew what I had to do at home they would all hate me. I wish that I didn't have to put up this facade.

I guess you all should know who I am. My name is Damien, and trust me any jokes you have I have heard before. I'm 16, and look like a football jock but im not. In fact I hate sports. I'm on the color guard team and also part of the AEP (art enrichment program) at school. My dad was a substance abuser, tweaker as they are called on the streets. My mom was a workaholic. They divorced when I was 9. My sister was my parents pride and joy. She graduated from Duke with a doctorate in virology. We haven't heard from her since.

I work in a metal shop, assembling electric go-karts and pocket bikes. Its decent pay, and the work is easy enough. Not to mention lifting and bending the steel gives me a better work out then half the gyms in town.

And now here is the kicker of my whole life. I'm a 16-year-old working class American kid who also happens to like guys. Yup im gay. If you had asked me 3 months ago if I would be writing this I might have socked you in the face. But that was all before I met him.

He was the new kid at school. Another jock type build. He had a Latinolook to him but was too light skinned to be a full-blooded Mexican. His name was Sebastian Jacobs. There was something about him I couldn't put my finger on that first day. His attempts to not look scared, his small hands not callused like the rest of us. He looked almost breakable, fragile, weak.

It ended up we had an art class together. It was my D-block TA class so I had to show the kid around. The class was 50 students arranged in small circles around supply lockers. I put him at "circle 2", the group closest to me. He got the stuff and started on the assignment for the day, to draw and shade any object in the room. The class was a 2-hour block so I had ample time to sleep before we had to clean up and leave.

The ear shattering tone of the bell woke me up as we all rushed out the door into a chaotic frenzy to the food lines known as morning break. I got into my usual line and got breakfast, biscuits and gravy. I sat down and started to hear my daily dose of teenage drama and gossip.

"OH MY GOD DAMIEN, did you hear what Jamie and Rodger did over the weekend?"

"Sam, im really not interested in what the quarterback and his little whore do on there free time"

"Very funny jackass, oh look here comes Nicole"

"NICOLE, oh my god do I have the greatest dose of gossip for you."

This was normally the point in break when I stop paying attention and start catching up on the sleep I missed the night before. But today I just started to look around at the school. It was about 15 years old and starting to show its age. Broken lights, hairpin fire sprinklers and falling stucco were staples of the schools main quad.

Then I saw him, looking completely lost and out of place.

"Well girls its off to the little boys room for me"

"Ok Damien, just don't fall in ok?"

"I'm with Nicole, there's nothing worse that wet ass in school toilet water"

"Thanks for the visual Sam, ill be right back"

I knew they wouldn't miss me. They would be so engrossed in the Jamie gets fucked story that I would be forgotten before I even left. I walked up to Sebastian and started a conversation with a simple "hey"

"Hey Damien, can you help me out right quick?"

The kid needed help, oh how fun.

"Sure kid what do you need?"

"I know I'm gonna sound like a complete retard, but where is room 224?"

"Ok kid here's the secret to this school, 100's are on the ground level, and 200's are on the second level. Rooms starting with the letter A are 1 floor down, you don't have to worry about B and C rooms unless you're doing P.E. or some sport."

"Thanks Damien, but seriously, where is it?"

"Like I said kid, upstairs. Well kid I must be heading back to the crowd, there gonna start thinking I'm rebelling against the iron fist of popularity."

"And what if you did?"

The lil bastard caught me off guard. I had never thought about leaving my friends. I hated them with a passion but I would never leave them would I?

"Well Damien I'm gonna go search the second floor for my class, thanks for the tip."

I was left standing completely dumfounded on what this kid had just told me.

I walked back to the table, noticing the crowd around Sam had grown considerably. She had a way with people.

It seems like everyone has a story to tell. And I knew everyone's lil story. I had enough blackmail on everyone to tear my group apart. But I remained the calm little center everyone crowded around.

Sam had enough skeletons in her closet to be considered a serial killer. Her mom was a heroin addict who overdosed about 2 years ago. Her dad is a rich scumball lawyer type. He sexually assaults her on a regular basis.

Nicole was one of my most trusted friends. Her mom left when she was 1 and her dad had been raising her ever since. They were struggling for cash every month. We went thrift store shopping together so we could pretend like we were just looking for cool old stuff when she would buy the essentials.

Then there was me. The calm composed little center of the group. As I have mentioned before my dad is a tweaker. He regularly beats me for being gay or some other stupid reason when he is high. My mom is completely oblivious to everything. She is a workaholic and when she isn't working she's with her boyfriend. When I come home she doesn't notice the bruises. No one does. At school I act like someone else. I am the master of the great disappearing act. I wish I didn't have to. If I could do 2 things it would be disappear for good or act like the real me. Both are impossible.

It must be nice to disappear. I always used to say that as a kid. Now I don't think its true. I sit on my roof every night and stare at the smokestacks of some random oil refinery in the distance. I stare at the flashing aircraft warning lights of the radio towers. I stare at the hillsides bathed in light. I stare at everything that makes this valley so horrible. And yet there is a subtle beauty in all this. If I look in the other direction I can see the lights of the rest of the slums, the lower working class houses built in the toxic waste part of town.

I have time to think on my roof. My father was never this insane. He was once a great guy. We used to live on the other side of town. Through those tunnels. I remember going to parks and playing with him. He used to be a great father. I don't know what happened to make him the way he is. But I remember the moment I started to hate him.

It was June 10th; I had just finished the 8th grade and was looking forward to a summer with my mom's house. Unfortunally it was a weekend I had to spend at my dads. I packed up my stuff and got into my moms car. As usual she was talking on her cell phone yelling at some manager to do this and fix that. I no longer paid any attention to this. We got on the freeway and started toward the tunnels, toward my dads' house. It was a normal weekend; I was helping my dad and step mom clean out there apartment and turning the couch into my bed for the weekend.

By the time I went to bed my dad was fried. I was asleep on the couch when it all happened. He came into the room and beat the shit out of me with a 2x4. I managed to get out of the apartment and to a pay phone to call my mom. She never picked up. I slept with all my clothes on and I still had my wallet in my pocket. I rode the bus back to my moms. From that day forward I hated him.

And now to the reason im with him all the time now. My mom is on a business trip to some exotic sounding country. I finally got my car so I at least have some freedom. But for some reason im always drawn to where im supposed to be. I don't sleep at night. I lay on my roof until about 6 then start my drive into the city. I shower at school before color guard practice. Then I do my classes and chill with my "friends" before coming back and lying on my roof all night. This is the pattern ive had for the past 2 months.

It must be nice to disappear.

Questions and comments? please send to

i would really like some feedback, i dont think im great at writing so any sugestions on how to make this story better would be greatly appreciated.