This is a story of friendship, commitment, love and trust. It is not a sex story. However, this story deals with love between two male teenagers. If you are offended by stories involving love between two teenage boys, please do not read this story. There may be some sex scenes in this story; however, sex is not the main theme. If you are under age 18 or 21 or it is illegal to read this story where you live, don't read it. Reproducing this story for distribution without the owner's permission is a violation of that copyright.
Just A Story
I did not expect to see what I saw as I walked into Charlie's bedroom. I was for a moment lost for words. I wasn't really shocked to see my cousin Paul making out with Charlie, after all he was madly in love with Charlie. I knew too that Charlie adored Paul and anyone could see how much of a strain he was under when Em was taking all his attention, even though Paul had said Charlie said he wasn't gay.
The only thing to say was, "So, Charlie, I take it you're gay."
As Paul said, my timing was great as Paul announced right after he and Charlie climaxed.
The situation was just too funny and we spent a while laughing.
"I'm a mess," said Paul.
"Me too. Shower?" responded Charlie.
"Yeah, I think so," said Paul.
"Hey, Ray, you should join us! The shower room is awesome!" Charlie dropped his towel, exposing his semi-erection, and then he added as he passed me and was walking towards the bathroom, "Then after the shower you can experience being blown. It is totally awesome, right, Paul?"
"Absolutely! A most incredible feeling, Ray!" laughed a now naked Paul, "You haven't experienced anything quite like getting blown after a fantastic shower." Paul grabbed me by the wrist and led me to the shower.
"I pass. I may be gay, but I'm not into group sex," I said.
Charlie gave me a confused, then slightly angry look, saying, "Who said anything about sex? Besides, Ray, you're a nice guy and all, but I don't love you. Sort of like your sister, I like her, but I don't love her. I only love Paul."
I guess out of curiosity as much as anything else I let Paul continue to lead me into the shower room. I watched as Charlie keyed in something on a flat panel. The lights flashed and there was the sound of thunder and I nearly jumped out of my swimming trunks. It began to rain from the ceiling and another flash and thunder and the rain poured down heavily. I can't begin to tell you what it was like other than to say it was like getting caught outside in a torrential downpour, but the water was very warm.
Suddenly the wind started whipping the water about and I was being hit gently on all sides by warm water. I looked to see Paul and Charlie embraced and in a passionate kiss and completely oblivious to my presence. I turned around and just enjoyed the shower. A few moments later someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around. It was Charlie.
"I'm sorry, we just got a little carried away. Do like the shower?"
"It really is awesome!"
"Yeah, well, it's time to get blown. Come on!" He grabbed Paul's hand and two of the most beautiful butts walked out of the shower room. "You better shed your swimsuit or you'll be in the blowing room for a long time."
"You ain't got anything we don't have. Maybe bigger, but then you're older than us," said Paul.
"Yeah, definitely bigger!" added Charlie.
"How do you know?" questioned Paul.
"I looked when we were all getting into our swimsuits," he blushed slightly. "Hey, I'm gay. I couldn't help it but you're the only one that made Mr. Prick start to get hard." Then he gave Paul a quick peck on the cheek, "Ergo, see. One little kiss and he's all excited!" Charlie giggled in his extremely cute little boy giggle as he pointed in the direction of Mr. Prick.
I stripped and followed them into another room. It was well lighted and there was another panel, where Charlie was again punching in information. Suddenly, music filled the room and air started blowing on us from all directions. Charlie immediately started singing at the top his voice and jumping about in time to the music. His voice wasn't great, but then it wasn't bad. The thing is, he was so thoroughly enjoying himself that you couldn't help joining in and in a matter of moments we were all dancing, singing, and getting blown by hot air circulating all around us. By the time the music had played twice we were completely dry.
"Charlie, that was the greatest blowjob I ever had!" I laughed.
"That's the only blowjob you've ever had," laughed Paul.
"Really? You liked getting blown?" asked Charlie excitedly as he wrapped a towel around his waist.
"Absolutely!" i laughed.
"Great! I'm going to ask the others," he said, rushing off to the balcony.
"Paul, you really have to educate this boy before he gets into trouble!" I laughed, not realizing that what was about to happen would be, I think, singularly the most embarrassing moment of my entire life up to that point because no sooner had I said this than I heard Charlie announcing to everybody in the pool, "Hey, everybody, can I have your attention. I have a ready awesome shower. So if any of you want a shower and a blowjob then come on up! Ray says that it's the best blowjob he's ever had!"
You know the cliché 'you could have heard a pin drop', well, you could have.
"Are you gay?" asked Eddie.
"Yeah, and so is Paul and Ray!"
"What!" exclaimed Phil, "I knew it! I knew Paul and Ray were gay!" He paused for a split second and then said, "Well, if they're coming out so am I! I'm gay too!"
Paul then says, "He means we are happy, right, Charlie? You are happy-gay?"
"Yeah, but "
I saw Paul signal me to pull Charlie back off the balcony, which I did.
"Look, Charlie uses words differently than we do. Like gay to him means happy."
"What does blowjob mean?" snickered Leslie.
"There is a room up here that has fans blowing warm air over you to dry you off -Charlie calls it getting blown. Ray was just being a smartass and Charlie has no idea what a blowjob is I think Ray is explaining it to him."
I looked at a very confused Charlie. "Charlie, a blowjob means getting your dick sucked."
"I don't follow."
"Getting your penis sucked orally by another person!"
"What! Then why did you call getting blown a blowjob!"
"Because the slang for blown means blowjob."
"So, you were just making fun of me!" Charlie looked at Paul, then turned and walked into a closet or something. He was clearly upset.
When Ray explained to me what a blowjob was, I suddenly became very embarrassed by what I had just said. They must think I'm a total idiot. I was confused. I knew what gay was and we three were gay-gay, so why did they tell everybody I meant gay-happy? I saw Phil get out of the pool and run for the front door. I realized I had put him in the position of being embarrassed about announcing he was also gay-gay.
I bolted from my room for the elevator and took it to the first floor and went out the front door. I saw Phil walking down the drive and ran after him. He was crying. I was nearly out of breath "Phil, hold up a second!"
"Leave me alone! Just go away and leave me alone!"
"No. I'm sorry for what happened."
He didn't answer.
"You're not allowed to cry because you're gay. It's against the rules."
"I know because I'm gay-gay. I mean I'm a homosexual. And so is Paul and so is Ray."
He stopped walking.
"I know you must think I'm a stupid idiot. I guess I'm just a freak! But I don't understand why you got embarrassed. I don't understand why Paul said I meant happy-gay when I meant gay as in homosexual! But I'm sorry! I really am!" I could feel a tear running down my cheek. "All I've ever wanted was friends and I just seem to mess things up! I'm really sorry." I turned to walk back to the house. I felt his hand on my shoulder. "Don't go. I'll survive. I hope. I just fucked-up as usual."
I turned around. We both had tears running down our cheeks and we both forced a smile and then a half laugh.
"I'll be your friend," he said as he extended his hand. So we shook hands and smiled.
"What does fucked-up mean?" I asked.
"Screwed up, uh, messed up and did the wrong thing."
We sat down on the lawn. I leaned back onto the soft grass and looked up at the sky, watching the clouds drift by. Phil did the same.
"How old are you?" he asked.
"Fifteen. And you?"
"Fifteen. How long have you known you were gay?"
"About an hour."
"Yeah, I mean. I knew I was attracted to Paul from the moment I met him, but I didn't know what to call what I was feeling. I thought a homosexual was something really disgusting and then I found out that it just meant that you're attracted to people of your own sex. What I don't understand is why it's such a big deal telling people you're gay. I mean it's just a label, a name. Yesterday, I was gay, but I didn't know what to call it. Now I know what to call it and it seems like it's something you're not supposed to talk about or let people know. Why?"
"Because some people hate gays. You get called names like fudge packer, faggot, and homo. Names that are meant to hurt you and make you feel bad like there is something wrong with you. People tend to shun you and then you end up with no friends."
"That's dumb and unfair!"
I turned over on my side facing Phil. He wasn't as good looking as Paul, but then Paul is exceptional. Phil was good looking and he seemed like a nice guy to me. He looked a little worried. I could tell he was thinking about something sad. "What's wrong, Phil?" His bottom lip began to tremble and tears began to flow again, he rolled over on his stomach and buried his head on his arm and sobbed. I rolled over and placed my arm around his shoulders and hugged him a bit, saying, "Come on, Phil, tell me what's wrong. I promise I won't desert you and I'll try to help, please, please don't cry."
"They are going to hate me. I know they will hate me. Now that everybody knows! I should never have said anything!"
"Who is going to hate you?"
"My mom and dad!"
"Duh! I'm gay! My dad is always saying something nasty about gays; he hates them!"
"So, what would they do?"
"They'll disown me, kick me out of the house!"
About that time Ray and Paul walked up to us.
I was still angry with both of them.
"What do you want?" I asked coldly.
"Just wanted to see if you were all right."
"We're fine. Bye!"
"Charlie, I "
"Goodbye! You made me look like a fool and an idiot! Ha-HA funny stupid boy! Why did you tell everybody I meant happy, not homosexual? Are you ashamed? Why did you lie? Now Phil has to tell his parents! What if they hate him? What then? Didn't think about that or you just don't care? Well, I care!"
"I came to say I was sorry."
"Oh! Oh yeah! Hey Phil! Everything is fine now! Go tell your parents! Everything is fine cause Paul said he's sorry!"
"Charlie, we didn't know that Phil was going to out himself! Why did you have to go out all three of us?"
"Are you that ashamed of loving me that you don't want others to know? I love you, Paul, and I don't care if the world knows. And if people don't like me because I love you, well well they can just go to hell and rot there with my ex-dad!"
"That's not it at all! You don't understand what it's like; you haven't seen what kids who come out about their being gay have to go through! Being heckled as they walk the halls, getting beaten up, some gays have even been killed for being gay!"
"Well, I guess I'm just stupid and dumb 'cause I'd die for you." I turned and walked away back to the house.
"You don't understand!" said Paul.
"Whatever!" I said and continued on my way. I was feeling really hurt and a bit confused. I had fucked things up for Phil and I had to unfuck them.
I went into the kitchen and found exactly what I needed, then proceeded to the swimming area.
"Can I have everyone's attention? Gather around here for a moment." I waited till everyone was nearby. "Is everyone here?"
"Yeah," said Simon, "Everyone except Ray, Paul, and faggot Phil." He snickered.
"You! Get out of the pool." He knew I was angry at him. "Simon, right?"
"Yeah," he replied.
"Well, Si-mon, Phil is my very good friend. And I fucked up - yeah, stupid rich kid fucked up! He misunderstood what I meant. Now he's out. And there is no one to support him except maybe me. Why, because although Paul and Ray are happy-gay, I'm not - I am gay. I'm a homosexual like Phil I guess. It doesn't bother me. I am what I am.If you don't like me because I'm gay, that's your problem. But that's just me. Phil is scared. He didn't really want to out himself, but because of my stupidity he did. Henceforth, you, my friends, will not say a word to anyone about him being gay. Not a peep. No comments to him unless they are positive. No insulting remarks like I just heard! Now all of you will remain my friends as long as you abide by what I have said. If you don't, you become my enemy! Si-mon, hold this. This is what happens to my enemies!"
"I have done this in karate class - but with two by fours!" I focused on the melon Simon was holding. "Hyyyaaa!" I struck and the melon flew into pieces. "Simon, you can clean up the mess. I want you to realize the mess your head will be in if I ever hear a comment from you again like the one you made."
"I-I'm sorry. I was just joking."
"Well, I'm not!"
I left the area. I was totally shaking inside; I'd never been so intense in my whole life. Phil was standing at the door. I stopped and he hugged me "Thanks, Charlie." I patted him on the back and continued on past Paul and Ray. I knew Paul wanted to talk, but I was too upset and still shaking inside.
I knew I was scared to come out. Its one thing to come out to your mom and your gay uncle and your gay cousin, but to everyone! Charlie just didnt understand! After his demonstration for Phil he just disappeared. I could feel his upset with me. Would he really face any danger for me? Was his love that strong? What about my love for him? Would I be willing to die for him? How strong was my love for him? How did the others feel about Charlies demonstration? Were they scared of him?
Rebecca took us all back to my place about an hour later. I was sitting by Em. Quite a demonstration, huh? She just shrugged her shoulders. So what do you think about him?
I think hes awesome. I think he loves you more than you can imagine. I think you and that ding-bat brother of mine hurt his feelings and I think you are a shit!
Why, 'cause I-I forgot to explain what blowjob means!
No. Because when he realized that he really was gay it was the happiest moment in his life and he wanted to scream from the highest mountain for all to hear that hed found you, hed found love. He thought you felt the same and obviously you dont. He was crying as he was pouring his heart out about his life. He wants friends more than anything in the world, but they have to be real friends. If Phil is outed or if he chooses to come out on his own, Charlie will be there for him no matter what and he doesn't love Phil like he loves you, but he respects him and considers him a real friend. Just before I left he said he doesn't care if you don't love him as much as he loves you as long as you don't hate him. He will love you beyond forever.That's why I think you're a piece of shit!
"So, you think I should out myself?"
"No. I think you should accept yourself as you are and stop trying to be something you're not! If you can't, then go fuck yourself and get out of Charlie's life so I have a chance. Cuz I think he's bi. He had one heck of a boner with me sitting on his lap!" She turned and started talking to Phil.
"Good morning, Charlie. Are you ready for your first day of school?"
"No. Yes. I guess. I'm a bit tired."
"Were you up late last night?"
"Yes, ma'am, I wrote something. But I'll be all right for school as long as it isn't too boring. I'm sort of nervous. I'm gay, you know."
"Yeah, it was sort of obvious, to me anyway. Are you okay with it?
"Sure. Are you?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. So I take it that the boy of your heart is Paul?"
"Yes although I was saddened that he was embarrassed to publicly proclaim his love for me."
"Don't be. I can see he loves you. We all have our own personal battles to fight. When he's ready, if he's ever ready, he will, I am sure, proclaim his love for you," she said with a smile, "Being gay sometimes isn't easy, there are people who are not in agreement with it and they can sometimes be rather nasty. So what I'm saying is, don't force Paul to follow his heart until he can deal with it and any possible consequence."
"Should I then keep quiet about my love for Paul, it's not what I want to do! I want to scream it to the world because loving him has made me so happy!"
"I think such matters should be kept between you and Paul until he is ready, then by all means both of you together scream it to the world!"
As soon as I got home I went straight up to my bedroom, laid down on the bed and started thinking about everything in my life over the last few days, especially Charlie. I know he wants me to be open about my love for him, which means I would be open about being gay. There was a knock at my door.
"Paul, can I come in?" asked my mom.
"Yeah, come in."
"Are you all right?"
I was about to say everything was all right, but I was shaking my head 'no'.
I nodded 'yes'. She sat down on my bed and gave me that 'so tell me about it' look.
"He's upset with me because I won't be open about my love for him. Em thinks I'm a shithead. Mom, if I come out then I'll lose all my friends! I'll be an outcast!"
"Oh, I see, so this one friend who you seem to love is not worth as much as all these other friends. Let's see, this one friend I think would stand by you through thick or thin and these others would drop you like a hot potato if you were to come out that you love the one friend. Well, son, I can't help you here; you have to make the decision, what the value of one true friend is compared with the value of all these others. You know, I had this same conversation years ago with my brother, of course he didn't have Charlie, but he did have somebody special and I think if Joey hadn't died they'd still be together today. Get some sleep, you've got school tomorrow."
Before she'd closed the door I had made my decision.
To be continued.
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