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I don't know why I was giggling to myself so MUCH on the way home, hehehe! But I can't deny that it made me feel super inside! Life was just too good at the moment to express with a straight face! You know?
Tyler. My Tyler. I still can't believe that I get to refer to him in that way. You know...as 'mine'. Even when it's just in my head, it sounds weird...but in this really sexy way.
My legs still felt a little weak after my baby gently...repeatedly...split me open in the most intimate way, thrusting his hardness into me over and over again, until his hot body was all wet and 'shivery' and stuff! I was so PROUD that I made him happy today! I mean, let's be honest...I didn't have anything to really offer Tyler other than my body and my heart and the most intense virgin boy kisses that I could give him. Can you believe it? It was actually enough! That totally blows my mind! He LOVES every second that he spends with me! He treats every awkward moment of my inexperienced sexual savvy as if it were the most precious gift on Earth! Like I was made of pure gold. He made love to me and protected me at the same time. And he never asked for anything more than my boyish smile in return. Not once. That one, lone, reward made the whole mind-blowing event worth every warm and sexy sensation that I could provide for him. Hehehe, it was enough. I was always enough. Tyler Jordan loved me. And he did it, like...just 'because'.
There's something really rad about that. You know?
The whole situation just made me feel so COOL! Like...WOW! Things like this happen to people a lot cooler than ME. People who don't trip over their own feet all the time and create chaos everywhere they go! I don't know what I did to deserve all this, but I'd do it a hundred more times if it meant that I could keep my angel forever and ever.
Wow....I'm never going to get used to Tyler Jordan being my boyfriend. I feel like such a geek, letting my love for him spill over like this every time he crosses my mind. Geez!
It was a really strange feeling, walking home like this. My muscles felt so relaxed and soggy. I honestly felt like I could have curled up on any park bench or under the shelter of any bus stop and just gone straight to sleep. No wait, I take that back...not go to sleep. I'm too giddy to sleep. More like, just...phase out for a little bit and stare up at the sky with a big goofy grin, and thank whatever exists above the clouds for making my every dream come true. I think it would be better to hurry home though. My undies still feel a little damp back there. Hehehe, I'm sure if I wiggled my butt like a year old piglet right now the feeling would probably tickle me half to death. But I fought the urge. That would have been silly. Still, it was like I kept the sexiest, naughtiest, part of Tyler with me the whole way home. It was kind of making me get a boner all over again. Geez, I've really got to hurry back before the cops arrest me for being some kind of a playground pervert or something.
Hehehe, GOD, life is awesome!
As soon as I opened my front door and walked inside, Gramms came walking out of the kitchen, wiping her hands off on a dish towel as she took a break in making whatever home cooked meal she had planned for my mom and dad and me by the time we all came home. "Hey there, kiddo!" She smiled. "How was the carnival?"
She gave me a strange look. "The carnival? That's where you and your friends went this morning, isn't it?"
"YES! Right! The...the carnival!" I grinned. "It was just...great, Gramms. All the rides and the popcorn and...stuff." It's not like I was telling a fib or anything. We actually did go to the carnival today. Just...you know...Tyler and I didn't stay for very long. That's all. We were having our own fun. Hehehe!
Gramms gave me a sideways look, accompanied by a sly smile. Then she says, "So...you and Tyler had a good time together, I take it?"
What the...??? "NO! We went to the carnival, Gramms! Just like I said."
I saw her forehead wrinkle a bit, and I realized that I was seriously jumping to conclusions over what she just asked me. "So...you boys didn't have fun at the carnival, then?"
Dangit! I'm going to ruin everything if I'm not careful. "Yes! I mean...well, sure we did. I thought you meant...like...whatever. It doesn't matter. It was fun."
She narrowed her eyes, making me nervous. "There you go...getting all backwards over that boy again. You must really like this Tyler Jordan boy."
Just hearing her say his name made feel all wiggly inside, and I felt my knees suddenly dip as I leaned back against a nearby wall to support myself through another unexpected Tyler swoon. "Oh I do, Gramms. Gosh...I really really..." I stopped myself, and then stood up to peek around a few corners, listening for any outside noises.
"What's the matter?" She asked.
"Mom and Daddy aren't home, right? Are they still at work?" I whispered.
She grinned, "Oh don't be so absurd. Ariel, your mother and father love you with all their heart..."
"I KNOW, I know, just..." I gave her the most pathetic face that I could muster up and whined, "...I don' think I'm ready for them to know yet. K? You're not gonna tell them, right? Not ever?"
"Of course not." She said. Then she was like, "I, personally, don't think you have anything to worry about, myself. But whatever it is that's got you so flustered and discombobulated these days, that's something that you've got to deal with in your own time, and at your own pace. It's simply not my story to tell."
I let out a sigh of relief. "Cool. Thanks, Gramma..."
I think it bugged her a little bit to see me worrying about it so much. She put her hands on my shoulders and said, "No matter what anybody tells you or how they make you feel about being true to yourself...don't you dare spend a single moment of your youth thinking that you aren't beautiful. You hear me?"
"I know, Gramms. I just..."
"No! No 'I just' excuses. You truly are beautiful, Ariel. One of a kind. Special in ways that you can't even comprehend right now...but someday you will see it for yourself. I see it. Your parents see it. Your closest friends see it. And it certainly sounds to me like this stunningly gorgeous Tyler boy sees it too. Nothing is going to change that. Everybody knows what an angel you are, sweetheart." She kissed me on the forehead. "It's about time you caught up with the rest of us."
It felt good to hear. It really did. But there's a weird teenager in me that caused me to roll my eyes and shrug off the compliment anyway. I don't know...call it adolescent instinct.
"Gramms..." I sighed, but she only pulled me in for a hug. I wrapped my arms around her and gave her a squeeze, feeling a tingly rush of emotion crawl over my shoulders as I turned my head to the side and listened to her heartbeat. Grandmother's give the best hugs! You know that?
I grunted little, trying not to be such a baby about the whole thing, but she patted me on the back, telling me to hush. Hehehe, it was so soothing to feel loved, even when I was dealing with such emotional chaos at the moment.
I don't know why I blurted it out, but I mumbled, "I won Tyler a teddy bear today."
Her smile was SO big! Hehehe! Awww...I did something good.
DID?" She asked.
"Uh hunh! It was one of those 'sports' booth thingies too! I threw a baseball and knocked over some stuff and I won. It was all so cool!" I loosened my embrace to look up into her eyes, and she gave me another kiss on the noggin before clutching me to her bosom again.
I could feel her chest bouncing as she chuckled heartily over my spontaneous and innocent confession. "Hahaha! Well, good for you, Ariel! I'm sure Tyler liked that a lot." She said. "I swear...you have more of your grandfather in you than you know. Such a charmer!"
"Really?" I asked. Then I smiled warmly and said, "Sweet. I'm glad." I know that I initially resisted the extra affection, but since my parents were still at work and all, and nobody was looking...I tightened my hug around Gramms' waist and melted into her embrace. Feeling a sudden moment of weakness...I whined, "Awwww, Gramms...he's the most beautiful boy in the whole wide world. You know? Everything about him just...totally redefines my idea of perfection in a boy." Can I say that? Is that, like...appropriate, or whatever? I didn't want to say anything about the sex, obviously. But...still, there was a part of me that was desperately trying to unleash this emotional outburst of unrestricted love and relay that special message to someone that would, hopefully, understand. "I think I'm really in love, Gramms." I sighed. "I mean, like...I cant help it. It just keeps spinning further and further out of control. I've only been away from Tyler for a little while and already I miss him so much that I almost wanna cry about it. I just feel like I need to...do something. Anything. I don't know. I just feel like it hurts my feelings to not be close to him right now. Does that make me a creepy stalker guy or something?" I was drooling my thoughts and feelings out so fast that I didn't take a moment to pass everything through my 'dummy filter' before saying it all out loud.
"Hahaha, it's ok, sweetheart. Be HAPPY! That's what young love is all about. What are you hording it for? Let it roll through you and express itself the way it was meant to. It's a good thing. Perhaps the greatest thing that there is." She said.
"I don't know. I always feel like it's soooooo much for me to handle all at once. Sometimes I..." I paused for a second. I felt silly saying it. But I went on anyway. "Sometimes I get really scared. I want to run away and just...keep myself from bumbling and messing it all up. Being around him makes me feel...like hiding away until I have a better idea about what to do. I feel like I'm not ready for this."
At this point, Gramms sat me down at the kitchen table, and she sat down in a chair next to me, taking a hold of my trembling hands. "You know, despite what you may think, I believe that love catches all of us by surprise. And it can be intimidating. ESPECIALLY those first few times that you go through the grueling process of dealing with the most powerful force on Earth." She smiled. "There are many people out there who are afraid of love, because it makes you feel so helpless. It leaves you open. Vulnerable. A lot of folks are terrified of that feeling. They want to feel as though they've got a better handle on things. That life is a bit more predictable than it really is." But she gave my hand a squeeze when she saw me bashfully gazing down at the tablecloth, my hair hiding my eyes from her. "But what you're feeling isn't fear, honey. What you're feeling is a sweeping surge of excitement. Awe, and wonder, and a true sense of purpose. It's overwhelming, sure. It takes time to get used to it, believe me. But if you hang in there, and you're as open and as honest with your feelings as your heart will allow without bursting in your chest from the sensation, hehehe...then you have a chance at something really special, Ariel. Something you'll be glad you didn't run away from when it was staring you right in the face."
"I don't wanna get hurt, Gramms..." I whimpered.
"Nobody does. That's why you've got to appreciate every moment of joy that you can find in this life. Squeeze it until it's dry, so you end up with no regrets in the end." She said. "When you have enough years behind you to look back at life and smile...you'll be glad that you took all of the chances that you did. K? Hurt or no hurt."
I wish I wasn't shaking the way I was. I mentally tried to get my jittery muscles to calm down, but they wouldn't listen. But...maybe she's right. I mean, even if I was on the road to getting my heart broken all over again like I did with Randy...it's not like I had any choice. At this point, it's not like I could stay away from Tyler if I tried. I guess I'm trapped. Stuck in the back of a runaway train...hoping that it's heading towards a sunlit horizon, and not over the edge of a CLIFF somewhere!
With a deep blush, I told her..."I think he loves me too."
"That's a rare and beautiful thing. Hold on to that." Gramms ruffled my hair a bit as I tried to hold back a few giggles, and that's when I heard keys rattling in the back door, and my dad walked into the house.
"Hi, Daddy..." I said, stepping back from Gramms and trying to straighten up a bit.
"If it isn't Spring Break Boy." He said, putting today's mail on the kitchen table. "I hear you and your friends were going out to the carnival today. You boys have fun?"
"Uh huh..." I said.
"Plenty of girls out there too, I'm betting." He grinned. "You didn't have a problem with them chasing you all over the place, did you?"
I blushed instantly at the idea. My dad always treated me as though I was some major heartbreaker or something. Like I was going to walk through the front door any day now with a supermodel on my arm. I just, "No, hehehe...not today."
"Ah well, that's even better. It means they were too shy to approach you, that's all. In another year or so, you'll be beating the girls off with a stick." He said.
Yeah, I can definitely agree with that statement. For ALL girls! Get away! I'm already in love! Don't touch me there! That's for Tyler Jordan only!
I grinned at his comment, but I noticed Gramms looking at me...almost with an expression of disappointment.
I don't really like to lie all that much. Not if I can help it. But when she looked at me like that and then turned away to go back to the stove and continue dinner...I realized that I was lying. I had been doing it for so long, just making something like this a normal exchange between my daddy and me...I just didn't see it as a fib anymore. Just normal talk. That's probably a bad thing, huh?
I told them that I was going upstairs to my room, and Gramms said she would call me down when dinner was ready. She kept her word. She didn't tell on me. But...I almost wish she had. If for no other reason than to save me the excruciatingly painful task of finding a way to do it myself.
I'll do it later.
I woke up EXTRA early the next morning! Omigod, when I saw the sunlight pouring in through my bedroom window...I smiled soooo hard that my whole jawbone hurt! Hehehe! I was super super hard too! Because I knew that I was only a short trip away from being totally naked with Tyler and having him do it to me again. I needed to get myself all showered and pretty and ready for more naughtiness and his house. Gah!!! I've got to jump in the shower before my parents take up all the hot water!
I got my undies and a robe, but I was so erect that I had to wait until everybody was in another part of the house before scurrying out from my bedroom to the bathroom. I didn't want to get caught being...ummm...nasty.
I had to try to avoid playing with myself in the shower. That was NOT easy! Every time I thought about Tyler's lips kissing mine, his blond hair hanging down over my face as he got on top of me...it was like I got another boner inside my boner! And it's hard to WASH yourself down there without triggering some naughty play! Washcloths have the kind of texture that rub over your tip or your shaft...and the next thing you know, you're shivering and breathing hard and thinking that if you don't jack yourself off to a big and sticky explosion SOON...you're going to turn into some sort of a MADMAN or something!
Still, I was careful. I shuddered when I got my shaft all soapy and wet. I shuddered even worse when I went even further down between my legs. And then, reaching back...well, it made me want to hurry over to Tyler's house even more! But I didn't waste any of my sperms or anything though. Promise. That's for my sexy boyfriend, not some stupid shower drain! Hehehe!
Gramms made us waffles and scrambled eggs this morning. I kind of wish she hadn't. They were awesome as usual, but then I had to go back up and brush my teeth again and floss and rinse with mouthwash. And even when I checked my teeth in the mirror, I got some baking soda out of the fridge and poured a little in my hand to take back to the bathroom and brush again. I wanted that sparkly pearly white gleam, you know? So when Tyler kisses me today, he can be like...'Mmmmm! You taste like spearmint!' and stuff! You know?
Ok, just...let me get hair right. I hope it's not windy out. It doesn't take much for my head to get messy. I looked my reflection in the eye, and sighed when I realized that I was smiling. Hehehe, I think I'm always smiling these days. My face is going to freeze like this if I don't take a break every now and then.
When I was getting close to Tyler's house, My pace picked up. I didn't want to be so anxious, but my heart was thumping like crazy in my chest. I didn't want to walk too fast. My hair was perfect. UGH! Stop fooling with it already. I didn't want to sweat. Slow down. Don't show up all sweaty and stuff. Is my breath still minty and fresh? Tyler's a total TEN on the boy scale. I should at least strive to be, like...a 'seven' or something. I don't know.
I rang the doorbell, and it only took a few seconds for the sound of Tyler's sock feet to approach from his room. I shifted from one foot to the other, my heart going even more bonkers than before. The second he opened the door and smiled at me, doing that sexy little blond hair flip thing that he does sometimes just before displaying the cutest little blush in his cheeks...oh gosh. I became so faint that I nearly fell over right there on his front porch.
How does he do that? How does he get more beautiful every time I lay eyes on him. What the heck am I going to do a week from now when he's too pretty to register in my brain anymore.
"S'up, Ariel? Come on in." He said. He was wearing these charcoal colored sweatpants and a white t-shirt. He just looked all comfy and snuggable at the moment. I didn't mean to sigh out loud, but I think I did anyway, by mistake. He started talking to me, and while I usually hang on every word he has to say, I found major chunks of his playful conversation falling on deaf ears. I was extremely erect, and I just...I wanted him to rip my CLOTHES OFF already! I mean, I didn't want to jump on him and make him feel dirty or anything, I just...just....awwww, Tyler, don't make me BEG!
Finally, after me following him around his house for a minute or two, all the way into his kitchen where he got a glass of grape juice, and then over to his sink, and then back into the living room...hehehe, I was following him so closely that I could practically smell the soothing warmth of his morning bed sheets still lingering on him. A pleasant fragrance if ever I smelled one. I just...I closed my eyes for a second and inhaled deeply.
Then I mashed my nose into the back of his shoulder, not realizing that he had stopped walking until I had already bumped into him from behind. "Hehehe, what are you doing?"
"Nuffin'..." I grinned. I looked into those big blue eyes of his and tried to telepathically let him know what was going through my mind at that very moment. Hoping he'd get the message. Tyler gave me a sideways look, making me giggle at first, but I stopped myself. "Hi..." I said softly.
"Hello." He said back to me. "What are you up to?"
I didn't know what to tell him, and I could already feel my cheeks turning red. So, while I still had the nerve...I raised up on my tip toes for a brief second and I kissed him on the cheek.
"Well, aren't we anxious this morning?" He grinned. Then he saw the tent in my pants. I know that we've already had sex and stuff, but it still makes me feel weird having myself 'on display' for him like that.
He stepped forward and cupped the front of my pants, causing my insides to squirm and my knees to nearly collapse. I don't know why I giggled out loud the way I did. I covered my mouth with both hands as the shock of my own reaction embarrassed me. "Sorry..."
"Ummm...hehehe...I dunno. Maybe? Maybe not..." It still feels scary to put my hands on him. I almost don't feel worthy of touching him in such an intimate way. But I raised a couple of shaky hands to rest lightly on his shoulders. "Hi..." I said again.
Tyler laughed in the cutest way, brushing some of my hair out of my eyes. "I'm talking to much, aren't I?"
"Unh unh, I'm listening." I said.
He raised an eyebrow. "Sure you are." Then he took me by the hand and said, "Come on. Let's get you taken care of."
Hehehe, I got really nervous all of a sudden. Or was I scared? Or...like Gramms said...maybe I was just excited. SUPER excited! "You don't have to. Honest. It's ok." Lie after lie came out of my mouth as I eagerly followed Tyler back to his bedroom. The sensation of his hand holding mine was electric. Having him 'guide' me this way allowed me to relax more. I didn't have to drive myself into a frenzy thinking of ways to get him on top of me. I just wanted to feel good again. I wanted to make him feel good again. And the moment his lips touched mine, it was like all of my clothes fell off at once...and we were ready for another day of making love and enjoying each other the best way that we knew how.
You have no idea what it's like to be on your back...watching Tyler leaning over you, shiny blond hair hanging down, having him all slippery and hard...concentrating on aiming his warm spear at my waiting hole with one hand...and then having those blue high beams directed up at you, with love and concern combined, just moments before he slowly pushes his way in for the first time. Wow. God, I just held my breath and tried to relax my body as much as possible before feeling the tender ridge of his tip sliding past my constricted ring. Best...feeling...EVER! You know?
It always takes a few minutes of effort before he can really sink into me as deeply as we both would like. I don't know, sex gets easier when it's our third or fourth time for the afternoon, but at first...it's like being a virgin all over again. Then...once he's in, and his hips are against the back of my thighs, holding them up, his soft kisses keeping me comfortable and pliable for him...he starts to pull out again. And push back in, and then withdraw...and every motion, every thrust, every heavy breath, makes me feel those happy sparkles all over and I can't help but to cry out with a boyish whimper, the only thing that relieves the pressure of unfathomable joy that my body is feeling at the time.
The second he entered me, all I could do is think to myself, "Oh gosh...here we go! YES!" Yeah, life is just too darn cool right now!
I hope Tyler doesn't me coming over to his house looking to get freaky the way I do. Hehehe, I know that we both have fun, but I don't want him to feel like I'm just using him. There's just something about being alone with him that drives me so CRAZY! He doesn't seem to complain though. Maybe this is what Gramms is talking about, you know? About being intimidated by the most powerful force on Earth and stuff. I was getting dressed, and I looked over at my lovely boyfriend as he teased his slightly dampened hair in his bedroom mirror. He was wearing his t-shirt, but he was naked from the waist down, the round mounds of his butt peeking out from underneath his shirt tail. I got all dreamy eyed and just...I blurted out, "I love you, Tyler."
He smiled, and he said, "Awww, I love you too, babe."
It didn't feel like it was enough for me to just sum all of my current feelings up into three little words, but I kept my mouth shut. Better to leave it at that than try to make up something else and come off sounding like a dork. I'm just glad that I get a chance to be THIS happy.
Fully dressed, Tyler and I just laid back on his bed and cuddled with one another for a while. Just to talk. I love Tyler's voice, but there's this added bit of hotness when you get to hear the vibrations of his every word rumbling softly in his chest.
It was after a brief kiss on the lips that I told him, "You don't mind me coming over and stuff, do you?"
"Hehehe, no. Why?"
"Well...because...I mean, I know everybody had these big plans for Spring Break and everything. I just...I'd get it if you wanted to go out and do fun stuff this week."
He lifted my chin and kissed me again. "I am doing fun stuff. Right here with you. I don't want to be anywhere else. K?"
"M'kay..." I smiled, and laid my head back down on his chest. Just to feel the gentle rise and fall of him while he was breathing. "So...you don't mind if I come over tomorrow too? I mean, so we can...be together. Like today. You can tell me if I'm being a pest."
"You're NOT being a pest. Hehehe, Ariel, what's gotten into you?"
"Nothing, it's just...everybody is going to the carnival and stuff. It's like 'the thing' to do this week. I didn't want you to feel like you missed out or anything." I said sheepishly.
"We already did the carnival thing, remember? I've got a great big teddy bear to show for it. Besides, I had a LOT more fun thanking you for it afterward." He heard me giggle and kissed the top of my head, his arm pulling me closer to him.
"I like spending time with Randy and Ryan too, but...I like it better here. Just you and me." I sighed. But, even though I should have passed my next few words through my 'dummy filter' first, I asked him, "You know...Sam and Matt...they really bother you don't they?" I don't know why I wanted to know, but there isn't a whole lot of stuff that bothers Tyler. Nothing puts a downer on his brilliant smile like the sight of those two. I used to notice it at the lunch table, or standing at his locker...but it made everything really awkward yesterday. In a way I don't think I've ever experienced before.
Tyler was silent.
Then he's like, "I wouldn't say the bother me. They're good guys. Both of them."
Shut up, Ariel. Shut up! "But...you always seem different when they're around. I thought maybe...you guys had some kind of wacky issue or something."
"Hehehe, a 'wacky issue'? You are too cute." I felt like he was trying to change the subject, and again...I was thinking 'SHUT UP, ARIEL'!!! But when I stopped talking, Tyler sighed and said, "We were friends for a while, and it was during a time when I was feeling kinda down. But..." He paused as he searched for a collection of 'careful' words, "...Well, I think Sam and Matt had a few wacky issues of their own. And it didn't include me. So they went their way, and I went mine. And now...I have you. And there are no more wacky issues for me to worry about. Not ever again. K?"
He kissed me again, and I just...I left it alone. I just want to be happy. I want us both to enjoy a few more quiet moments before I had to go back home.
I'm in love. That's all that's important. Right?
Having true love in your life leaves you wide open, sure. But it also makes you feel invincible. So being open isn't a problem. It's a leap of faith. Definitely.
Well, I have faith in you, Ty. Totally.