What had I gotten myself into? I said no and here I was riding "shotgun" and headed to a motel with Randy and Kyle. .
Kyle turned to me. "So are you joining us or watching?"
He grinned. "Yeah, and for how long?"
I stared out the front window. "Until you're done and you bring me home. After which I'll be grounded again because I'm sure my parents will call while I'm gone."
"For fuck sakes," Randy said from the backseat. "Quit being such a chicken shit. Enjoy it while you can. Before you know it you'll be forty-five."
My head turned back. "And who says I won't be able to fuck at forty-five?"
"Sex is for the young," he exclaimed from the back seat. "Seems like those old guys only do it now and then. You've seen all those Viagra and Cialis ads on TV, who do you think they're for? Not for guys like us. Enjoy it while you can still get it up."
The image of Matt sitting at home while I was off to do who knows what didn't settle with me too easily. Yeah, I'm a horndog, but friendship means a lot to me. But Randy and Kyle just took over my life. I couldn't believe I was still in the car. "Pull over. I want to get out."
Kyle gave me a quick glance. "If you want out that bad, just get out."
"Fuck off. I'm not going to kill myself."
He grinned. "Well, watching us fuck isn't going to kill you either. Relax."
I folded my arms in front of me and sulked like a little kid. Randy and Kyle talked about the sex they were going to have and I have to tell you it made me horny. I think that was their intention. Kyle was as hot as Dillon, if not hotter. He wore a polo shirt that form fitted around his upper body. His stomach was flat as he sat with his veined arms and hands on the steering wheel. The blond hair was short and his jaw chiseled. I'll have to admit, he had a sexy smile. He wasn't the guy I usually saw Randy hanging around with.
Finally I broke my silence. "Where do you go to school? I've never seen you around Edison High."
For the first time he seemed hesitant. "I'd rather not say."
I pushed on. "How did you meet Randy?"
He didn't say anything. Randy spoke up. "I was just walking down the street on my way home when he pulled up to talk to me. Asked me if I needed a ride."
"And you got in?" I asked. "What the fuck's the matter with you? He could have been a serial killer."
Randy put his hand on Kyle's shoulder. "He was hot. He started to drive me home when I suggested we drive out of town and talk somewhere private. He gave me a funny look and asked, "what do you have in mind?' When we got out to a spot, he didn't say much or do anything, so I put my hand on his cock, unzipped his pants, pulled his cock out, and sucked it. That's how it all started."
I turned to Kyle. "How old are you?"
"Good, because Dillon Burke's in jail for having sex with minors."
He grinned. "I'm smarter than that."
He pulled up in front of a room at a Motel 6 on the edge of town. "Hell, Dillon at least took us to the Oxford Suites," I pointed out.
"Sorry, I'm not Dillon. He had money."
I stepped out of the car so Randy could get out and then got back in. Randy held on to the door so I couldn't close it. Kyle got out, pulled the motel key out of his pocket, and stuck his head back in the car. "Suit yourself. We'll be out in a bit."
Randy leaned toward me, put his hand on my cock, and kissed me hard for a second. "Are you sure you don't want to join us? At least come in and watch."
"What the fuck," I said. "Haven't had any porn to watch. Just as well watch you guys. And besides, my life is already shit because I'm here and not home."
"You're right. Just as well make the best of it."
Kyle already had the door open. I followed Randy into the room. Despite all the sex I had, this was the first time I felt this nervous and scared. I'm not sure why.
The room was small with a queen-sized bed, a TV on a dresser, and a small round table with two chairs. Randy flipped on the TV. "That way it'll be harder to hear us fucking." He then threw four or five condoms on the bed. "We'll need these."
Randy walked up to Kyle and started kissing him while unbuttoning Kyle's shirt. Kyle was somewhat passive. But Randy soon had his and Kyle's shirt off while they tongued each other and rubbed their hands all over their upper bodies. My cock was on the rise.
Randy knelt on the carpet and had Kyle's pants down to his ankles and his cock in his mouth in a second. Kyle began to groan. It was like he'd forgotten I was in the room. Kyle stepped out of his pants and Randy pushed him down on the bed with his cock up. Randy was on that cock in no time. "Oh shit, that feels good," Kyle let out.
My cock was hard, so I slipped my pants down and pulled it out. Randy noticed and had my cock in his mouth before I got a chance to put my hand on it. His mouth was warm. He licked up and down the shaft, licked and sucked my balls, and ran his hand up and down my chest. Kyle got up off the bed. "Looks like our friend might be joining us after all."
Kyle pulled my pants, shoes, and socks off and began sucking my toes. I'm not sure why, but it felt damn good. Randy pulled my polo shirt off over my head and began sucking and licking my nipples. He stopped for a second. "This is better than watching isn't it?"
All I did was nod.
Kyle moved up and kissed me and nibbled on my ear. Randy pulled me up by my shoulders and threw me on the bed. I love this rough stuff. Then the two of them were all over me and it was too late. Of all things, the picture on my desk of Matt and me with our arms around each other flashed in my mind. I began to moan and then from my mouth came the word, "knots."
The two of them stopped for a second. "Knots?" Kyle asked.
I lay back with a sigh. "It was nothing."
Kyle knelt on the bed and put his cock in my mouth. It was a nice size but not too big. "Now, isn't this better than sitting in the car?"
Randy was licking my balls and stopped for a moment. "I know how much you love sucking cock. Now it's your turn," he commented.
He pulled me up off the bed and pushed me down on my knees as he stood in front of me. He placed his cock on my waiting lips. I opened up and took it in, thinking how much I loved having a guy's cock in my mouth. Kyle got behind me, pulled my ass up, and started licking my hungry hole. He seemed to have lost his early shyness. I licked Randy's shaft and sucked on his balls before taking the tip and massaging it with my lips and tongue. He groaned and prayed to God.
My ass was soon aching for a cock. I needed a cock in my ass. "Someone please fuck me!" I yelled.
Kyle was already behind me so grabbed a condom off the bed and soon had his cock and my ass lubed and ready. He slipped his cock in slowly as my hole opened gradually to let it in. A smile crossed my face as I thought of the time I told Dillon I was going to charge him for parking his dick in my ass while he waited for my love canal to get used to having that foreign body inside me.
I was sucking away on Randy's cock while Kyle fucked me. Randy pulled out and knelt with his ass in front of me. "How `bout giving my asshole a good licking?"
By then, I'd have done anything. All thoughts of Matt or knots or being grounded or playing quarterback were lost in our passion. "Fuck me harder," I yelled at Kyle..
"Glad to oblige," he replied, as he increased his speed and rammed his cock into my ass. All I heard were his thighs slapping the top of my calls wevery time he thrust into me.
Randy was groaning as I'm licked his ass and stuck my tongue inside. "Let's chain fuck," he said.
Normally, I'd be the one in charge, but Randy took over. Kyle seemed more of a follower. Kyle pulled his cock out of my ass as we climbed on the bed and lay on our sides. He slipped it back in as Randy put a condom on my cock, lubed it, and then lay on his side so I could slip it into his ass. We were fucking away, moaning and panting with the TV blaring. Who knows if anyone heard us.
Kyle yelled, "I'm going to cum. I'm going to cum. Do you want it in your ass?"
"Fuck yeah," I replied.
Soon I felt a warm sensation flow into the condom and it made everything seem worthwhile. I no longer gave a shit about the consequences.
Randy turned back to Kyle as he removed his cock from my ass. "I want a piece of that." He slipped a condom on, lubed up his cock, lay behind me and shoved his cock in hard and fast.
Two cocks in my ass in just a few minutes sent me over the edge. "I'm going to cum. Fuck." It was hard for me to believe I didn't want to join them. My sexual passion was on overdrive as I felt my cock stiffen and my balls tighten "Fuck. Fuck." I did't want it to. "We got to do this again."
I thought about shooting my load into Randy's ass, but I wanted to see my cum shoot on my chest and abs, so I rolled on my back, ripped the condom off, and shot cum all over myself. Randy took my cock in his mouth and sucked it dry while Kyle licked the cum from my chest and abs.
My breathing slowed and my passion ebbed. It was then I looked up at the flickering ceiling light that flashed its dull glow on the brown bedspread and orange and green curtains. Suddenly, I felt sick. What had I done? Again the picture of Matt and me with our arms around each other flashed through my mind. I moved toward the edge of the bed. "I gotta to go."
"I thought I heard you scream you wanted to do it again," Randy snapped.
I sat up and started to put my clothes on. "Not today. Maybe some other day. Right now I want to go home."
Kyle surprised me because he started to get dressed. "Maybe we should go."
Randy scowled. "What the fuck's the matter with you guys. We have a room and time."
"Nothing, Randy," Kyle replied. "We had our fun. Let's get him home."
My stomach churned as I bent over to tie my shoes. Lunch was on its way up as I ran to the bathroom, slammed the door, and vomited in the toilet.
Randy voice shot through the bathroom door. "The asshole's sick and whatever he's got we're going to get."
"Cool it, Randy," Kyle insisted. "Do you want everyone in this place to come to our room to see what's going on?"
That quieted him. I flushed the toilet, washed my face, swirled some water in my mouth, spit it into the sink, and swung the door of the bathroom open. "I'm not sick. Now get me home."
A few people were either getting their bags out of their cars or putting them in when we came out of the room. A man and woman glanced at us with suspicious looks. There was some guy sitting in his car. He'd backed into a spot across from our room. He glanced up as we came out.
Kyle unlocked the car, Randy pulled the passenger side door open, and pointed to the backseat. "Get in."
"What happened to the red carpet treatment," I snapped.
"Fuck you, Andy. Now get in."
I jumped in and we rode in silence to my house. My parents weren't home yet and I hoped no one would find out what happened, but figured it was probably just wishful thinking.
Kyle patted my thigh and said, "Nice to meet you. Thanks for the good time. Sorry you got a little sick."
Nothing came out of my mouth as I opened the door and headed up to the walk and into the house.
I checked the answering machine to see if my parents had called. They had. "Shit," I said out loud.
I ran into my parents' bathroom, stripped, climbed into the shower, and scrubbed myself as if the dirt would never come off. There was nothing I could do about the dirtiness I felt inside. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I sat on the floor and let them flow until there were no more in me. I thought of our foursome for a second, and none of it seemed important anymore. The same emptiness I'd felt when I found out Dillon betrayed me returned.. And there was nothing I could do about it. Matt wouldn't be there to help me this time.
The silence in my room was deafening. I sat naked on the edge of my bed for a few moments before looking up at the picture of Matt and me on my desk. It looked like something had changed. I thought of The Picture of Dorian Gray. But it wasn't the picture that changed. It was me. I felt I'd betrayed the two boys in the picture whose happy smiles stared at me as I picked it up for a closer look. The picture dropped from my hands and the glass broke. I bent over, picked up the picture, and slipped it into my desk drawer. I couldn't bear to look at it.
I finally got hold of Andy around 4:00 p.m. "What's up?"
He sighed. "Nothing."
"I called earlier. Where were you?"
"Went out for awhile."
"Randy and this guy, Kyle."
"What'd you do?"
"Yep. Figured it was better than staying home."
"Is Kyle the guy Randy's been fooling around with?"
"You don't sound like yourself. Is something wrong?"
He moaned. "You know that picture of us that we both have on our desks from when we were ten? I picked it up to look at it, it slipped out of my hands, and the glass broke."
I smiled. "That's a great picture, isn't it? A lot's happened since."
"Yeah, a lot. Knots, like you say."
"Right, I'm the philosopher. Anyway, you can always get the picture and frame fixed. I stayed home all day. Talked with my mom over breakfast, watched football with my dad, and read more of The Picture of Dorian Gray. It was a good day."
"I was thinking about the book today."
"You know, the picture of Dorian Gray. How it grew old, and he didn't. Sometimes I wish we could go back to when we were ten."
"Not me. Having a little quiet time with my family was good. It gave me time to think and focus. Crazy isn't it?"
"We have our whole future ahead of us. We just need to avoid those damn knots."
"Yeah, those damn knots. What kind of a future do we have if we've tied too many knots?"
I paused for a couple seconds. "You don't sound good. What's wrong?"
"Just tired is all. I'll talk to you later. You can get back to your book."
"Are you sure nothing's wrong?"
"Yes, I'm fine. My parents should be home pretty soon. Talk to you later."
He hung up without even a goodbye.
I was going to call back, but decided against it. Something wasn't right. Andy had never lied to me so I believed him when he said they'd just gone out for a ride. But hell, I never lied before and I lied to his parents and mine. Yeah, more of those pesky knots.
There wasn't any sense in worrying about it, so I sat in the living room in my mom's recliner and continued with The Picture of Dorian Gray. What happened next was terrible. The cruelty that showed in the picture scared Dorian and he decided to make amends with Sibyl and ask her to marry him. He was getting ready to post his note when Lord Henry appeared at his door and told him Sibyl was dead from an apparent suicide.
Dorian turned to Lord Henry who had just seated himself. "I said I would go back to her. I felt I had done wrong. And now she is dead. My God! My God! Henry, what shall I do? You don't know the danger I am in, and there is nothing to keep me straight. She would have done that for me. She had no right to kill herself. It was selfish of her."
I remember thinking, what a strange reaction.
Lord Henry tells Dorian his marriage would have been a failure.
Dorian replied, "I suppose it would...But I thought it was my duty. It is not my fault that this terrible tragedy has prevented my doing what was right. I remember you saying once that there is a fatality about good resolutions—they are always made too late. Mine certainly were."
I had to agree with that statement. What a book it is. Oscar Wilde was a genius.
In the middle of this conversation, Dorian says, "I must sow poppies in my garden." The reference made me wonder why Dorian would be thinking about planting poppies rather than shedding tears over the suicide Sibyl Vane. It appeared to me as I read that Dorian was incapable of dealing with his mistakes and the tragedy he brought about by his cruelty.
But what Lord Henry said next caught me by surprise. "You are more fortunate than I am. I assure you, Dorian that not one of the women I have known would have done for me what Sibyl Vane did for you."
I remember thinking, Are there really people like Lord Henry in this world?
It was getting late so I said good night to my parents and headed to my room. The picture of Andy and me with our arms over each other's shoulders caught my eye and made me think of how upset Andy was that he'd broken the glass. I grabbed it by the frame and realized we'd always be ten in that picture. Those were simpler happier times. But I realize now that life is about moving forward and not trying to tread water all our lives. We'd make mistakes and tie our knots, but like Oscar Wilde said, "Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes."
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. - George Bernard Shaw
A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them. - John C. Maxwell