Colt, Matt, and Andy were practicing football three times a day, leaving Megan and Zoe wondering what had happened to their relationships. Megan and Zoe were sitting on the floor leaning against Megan's bed. Megan was in tears, and Zoe had her arm around her trying to comfort her. "Megan, you just can't trust guys. All they want is sex."
Megan stopped crying. "I thought Matt was different." She started crying again. "But he's just like every other boy except that he's bisexual. I should have known better. Why in the hell would a guy prefer another guy over me?"
"Maybe you should have waited."
"I know, but I wanted him so badly. He wanted me too. We agreed that we'd be each other's first."
Zoe wiped a tear from Megan's eye. "But Megan, you know you weren't his first. He'd been with Andy and other guys before you."
"I know. But this was different. I was his first girl."
"Maybe, but you were taking a chance."
Megan wiped her own tears. "It's not that he doesn't want to have sex. We have great sex. It's that he doesn't think of me as his girlfriend."
"Maybe you should have discussed this before you had sex?"
Megan began to cry again. "Maybe so. But it would have ruined the mood and everything."
"Hey, look on the positive side. You had great sex while it lasted."
Megan pushed Zoe away. "What do you know about it? You're so pure you ran Colt off. You have nothing to show for the time you were together. You're just a big tease."
"Maybe so, but my virginity is intact. And you have no more to show for your having sex with Matt than I do. Matt is moving on."
Megan stood, went to the mirror, wiped the tears from her eyes, and pinched her cheeks. "Zoe, I'm not giving up. He didn't break up with me. He just said we need to talk. I'll back off for a while and then reel him back in slowly so he doesn't know he's been hooked. They're all playing football now, so they're going to be busy anyway. I suggest you lure Colt back. He wants sex with a girl. If he doesn't get it from you, he's going to get it from some other girl. . Maybe he'll even go back to Thomas or some other guy."
Zoe stood next to Megan as they both looked in the mirror. "I don't know what to do. I want him, but I'm scared. Once you give up your virginity, you can't get it back."
Megan spun around and grabbed Zoe by the shoulders. "Who in the hell cares. What's all the fuss over virginity anyway? Everyone acts like it's the most important thing in the world. After Matt and everything that's happened, I think it's stupid. So Matt and I had sex? It was good sex, and it's not like I have a big sign on me that says Megan lost her virginity to Matt Spence. Hell, if nothing else, I'm more practiced and experienced. It'll be better for the next guy or my husband. Maybe you should think of it that way, Zoe, and have a little fun. I don't think Colt is the kind of guy that would run around talking about the sex he had with you. I'm sure Matt doesn't talk about me. Well, except for maybe talking to Andy."
Zoe smiled. "Yeah, those two are a little like us, except they've had sex with each other."
"Yeah. And you know what, the thought of them having sex together really turns me on. They're both hot guys."
"I know what you mean."
"So what are you going to do about Colt?"
"I think I've lost him."
Megan threw herself on the bed. "I doubt that. Guys think with their you-know-whats, and if he thinks he can have you, he'll come running. Don't forget, he's what I think they call bi-curious. Let's go out to the last football practice of the day and wait for them."
"You realize that could scare the shit out of them and could backfire on us."
"True, but nothing ventured nothing gained."
Preconditioning was finally over and we were able to practice in pads. Only problem was, we had three practices a day, and I was exhausted after the last practice. Andy and I walked home together and went our separate ways as soon as we got to my house. Colt had been out for a few days, and he looked good. Thomas and Andy might be our starting halfbacks if Andy kept working as hard as he was. Andy was transformed. His deal with Dr. Walker seemed to help him focus. We had been lifting weights, but not long enough to make much difference. It was more psychological than real. I know that lifting always makes me feel stronger and more in shape. The problem was, that after three practices a day started, the last thing we wanted to do was lift weights. Then on the third day of three-a days who should we see watching us but Zoe and Megan.
Andy and I were drying off after our shower when he said, "I think you're being stalked."
"I think you're right. I've been kind of avoiding her."
Andy snapped his towel at me. "You said you were going to talk to her."
I jumped out of the way. "I was, but I'm a coward."
"Don't you think it's time you face the music?" He lowered his voice and pointed at his cock. "Then you can have some of this."
"Yeah, I know. Anytime I want it, right?"
"Yep, and no strings attached."
"I don't know, Andy. There's always strings attached."
He slipped on his boxer briefs. "Since you're not interested, I may as well cover it up." "Fuck you, Andy. I'm being serious. Why can't things ever be simple?" I threw my shirt over my head and put on my briefs.
"Because you make them complicated. Look how simple my life is. No complications. No drama."
"Well, Andy, I know you well enough to know that won't last forever."
"Where's your confidence in me? You need to encourage me. Not be a Negative Nelly. I'm actually happy right now."
"Negative Nelly? You must be joking. Who talks like that?"
He grinned and rubbed his hands up and down his chest and abs just to taunt me, then slipped on his shirt. "I don't know where that came from. Must have heard it somewhere. Anyway, you better go out and face the music."
"I guess you're right."
Colt headed over to us. I took a quick glance at Thomas, who was still getting dressed and not talking to anyone. A picture of us having sex in the vacant house flashed into my mind and then slowly disappeared. Colt began flirting with Andy.
Andy smiled at him. "Colt, I think Zoe and Megan are waiting outside for you and Matt."
"I don't care about Zoe anymore. She's just a tease."
"Maybe things have changed. You never know."
Colt put his hand on Andy's shoulder. "Well, if I can't have you, I guess it'll have to be Zoe."
The last thing I wanted was to talk to Megan. My mother's words ran in my head. "You made your bed, now lay in it." She was right. It always surprises me that you can hear your parents say something over and over, and it doesn't make much sense. And then at a moment like this, it all seems clear. I'd rejected Andy, went after Megan, felt trapped, and now found myself lying in the bed I made. "Come on, Colt, let's go out and face the music."
"There's nothing to face. She's not going to have sex with me so why bother."
"Colt, with girls, you just never know. It's probably worth listening to what she has to say. Andy might be right. Things might have changed. You can always hope."
It was obvious Thomas was listening, but he just kept his back to us as he got dressed.
Megan and Zoe grabbed our hands as soon as we walked out of the locker room.
Megan squeezed mine. "We need to talk."
Zoe said, "Colt, we need to talk too."
Megan guided me toward the shade of the trees that lined the practice field. "You've been avoiding me."
She sat down and I dropped down beside her. "No I haven't." That was a lie of course.
"Yes, you have. I thought you were better than that."
"I guess I'm not."
She grabbed my hand and placed our hands on her thigh. "Are we done or not?"
"I don't know, Megan. I like what we have. I mean, what we had."
"I bet you do," she said with some sarcasm.
"You did too, didn't you?"
"Yeah, but I'm not going to be your toy."
I didn't know what I wanted. Sometimes we hate letting go of something even if we know it's not the right thing. "You're not my toy. We're monogamous. I'm not fooling around with anyone else. I just don't want to be tied down in a relationship."
She slapped me. "You're so full of shit, Matt. If we're together all the time, and we're having sex, what do you call that, if not a relationship?"
She had me there. But I had an answer. "A sexual relationship. That's it. I just don't believe in having sex with more than one person at a time. I'm committed to you in that way."
"More crap," she yelled. The guys leaving the locker room glanced over. Megan lowered her voice a little. "Hell, you've had sex with three people at once. You messed around with other people while you and Andy were having sex. So don't give me that crap."
I stood. "Megan, I don't have time for this shit. We're done. That will make us both happy." I walked away.
She ran after me. "Wait. We can work it out."
"No we can't. I have a football season to get ready for, and I don't have time for this kind of drama. It's better for both of us if we just end it."
"But, I don't want it to end."
I spun around to face her. "Make up your mind."
"I have. I want you however I can have you."
"Too late," I said as I looked down into her red eyes.
"It's never too late."
"Sorry, Megan. But like my mom would say, you made your bed now lay in it. We're done. Sorry if I hurt you. I take some of the blame. But don't forget, you were the one who initiated the sex, not me."
"Yeah, but you were happy to oblige."
"You're right. And now we're both miserable. Let's just remember the great sex we had and leave it at that."
"So you're going to end it, just like that?"
She put her hands on her hips. "You're a bastard, you know that? I'm not sure what I ever saw in you."
"Look, Megan, it takes two. So don't put this all on me. We should have talked about all this ahead of time, but we didn't. Life happens. Can't we just be friends?"
"Thomas is my friend. At least I know where I stand with him."
I grabbed her hand, but she pulled away. "Megan, Thomas wasn't interested in having sex with you. He told you so, and you chose friendship. I was interested in sex with you, and now you're blaming me because you got what you wanted?"
She put her hands on my chest and shoved me. "I...I don't know."
Andy came out of the locker room, spotted us, and came over. "What's up?"
"Leave it alone, Andy," I said.
"Okay. Just wonderin'. Looks like you made Megan cry. Her eyes are all red."
"Nothing like stating the obvious," I replied. "Andy, I think you should just go."
Megan grabbed Andy's hand. "No, stay. You know what they say, misery loves company."
Andy got a confused look on his face. "What do you mean?"
"Matt won't commit to either of us. Doesn't that hurt?"
"You're right, Megan, but at least he's consistent. I'd have been pissed if he had become your boyfriend and wouldn't be mine. I respect him for that. You're right about misery loving company. I know how you feel. But that's Matt, and if we really love him we'll accept his decision. At least you're having sex with him. That's more than I'm getting."
Megan gave me a pissed look. "You told him?"
"Andy and I talk about everything. He's the only one who knows."
She slapped me again. "I figured you might tell Andy, but you should have kept it between us. I never want to talk to you again. You're no good."
"Megan," I said. "It doesn't have to be that way. We can be friends. We can even be friends with benefits."
That really pissed her off, and looking back on it now, I understand why. I'm not even sure why I said it.
"Fuck you, Matt," she said as she stomped off.
Andy hit me in the shoulder. "I should slap you too. If you're going to have a friend with benefits, I expect it to be me."
Hurting Megan should have bothered me more. It did bother me, but I did what we always did to make ourselves feel better. I heard myself say, "I think you're right. Are we going to your house or mine?"
"Mine," he said. And we left.
I suppose if Andy, Thomas, and I hadn't been through so much, it would have been different. Sex was an important part of my life and still is, but I suddenly realized that while I loved the sex with Megan, I could move on because there wasn't any way I was going to stay with her just for sex. Megan didn't have the same options I had, which made what I did all the worse. Yep, just a few more knots. Sometimes we never learn.
Colt's hopes were high, so he greeted Zoe with a quick kiss when they met outside the locker room that afternoon. They made small talk before finally walking off to their own spot under the shade of a tree and noticing Matt and Megan arguing. It should have been a warning to Zoe, but she ignored them and stayed focused on her task. She grabbed Colt's hand. "I think I'm ready."
"Really. You mean it? I am too. When and where?"
"Slow down. You sound like you're ready to do it right here on the grass in front of everyone."
"Do you want to?"
Zoe laughed. "Don't be so silly."
"A guy can hope."
She gave him a kiss on the cheek. "You're funny. Come over this weekend. My parents are going to be out of town."
"You don't believe in foreplay, do you?" Zoe asked.
"I'll show you Saturday."
"Okay, but what time?"
"Come by around noon. We'll have lunch first."
"Is that what you mean by foreplay?"
Zoe smiled. "You're like a little boy who can't wait to open his presents on Christmas."
"Yeah, I am."
Colt was rock hard. "Noon it is." He stood.
"Aren't you going to kiss me?"
"Oh, yeah. I almost forgot. Too excited I guess." He kissed her.
Zoe was flattered at Colt's enthusiasm and failed to notice the lack of enthusiasm between Matt and Megan.
Matt had finally found his way back home and into my arms. We ran to my house and had our clothes off and our cocks in each other's mouths before you could yell hallelujah. We wrestled naked on my bed. We kissed and fingered and sucked and licked each other. It was the best sex we had had in a long time. It was great having Matt back.
Andy and I had great sex that afternoon, and I think he thought everything was back to normal, but it wasn't. It was just friends with benefits. I suppose that down deep he knew that, but he figured I'd gotten girls out of my system and was ready to be his boyfriend. But that wouldn't have been any fairer to Megan than it would have been if I'd become Megan's boyfriend. Andy was happy with the sex for a few days, but eventually suggested that we get together with Ashton and Scott. And like a fool, I agreed.
"Maybe Colt would be interested too," he said.
"I think he's going to be with Zoe for a while."
"You may be right. They looked all lovey-dovey. I gave them a quick look just before you got your face slapped."
"That slap hurt like hell."
"Serves you right. You should have been with me all along."
"Well, Andy, it looks like everything is back to normal. We're going to be screwing around with other guys, and who the hell knows what's going to happen next?"
You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself. Sam Levenson
A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them. - John C. Maxwell
I have made terrible mistakes that have hurt the people
that I cared about the most, and I am terribly sorry. I
am deeply ashamed of my terrible judgment and my actions. -
If you like this story, contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org I answer all emails.
I'd like to thank Lisa for taking the time to edit Knots 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5. As the author, I take final responsibility for all parts of the story, including any errors.
This story is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author's imagination and are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, events or locales, is purely coincidental and no slanderous intent is implied.