The Life of Jonathan, Chapter 2 - The end of the first life

-By Vincent-

"Yes, I like you. You're a cool guy. Maybe we should hang out sometime."
Ok, we can now resume our flight...
As much as I would like to think that he was trying to get into my pants, I knew that I had let my gullible side get the best of me. I should have known better.
"Um, ok, sure, that would be nice," I replied to Ross, after thinking that he liked me in a different sort of matter altogether
" Hey," he said at the table. " There's going to be a concert outside of town on Friday. Do you think that you'll be able to make it there?"
I had been speechless once Ross said that he liked me. Now I had to find my voice.
"...Um, ok, I guess I could go. But I don't have a way to get there--"
" I'll pick you up," Ross said to me. " I've got a car."
"...Alright, then, looks like I'm going..." I said, trying to sound enthusiastic about it.
" Looks that way," he said in a certain if he was actually happy to have me there..?
As his date...??
" Well, I gotta go. See you later, man," he finished as he went to wherever it was that he had to go.
I was puzzled by the whole thing. However, I knew that it was still my imagination running wild again. I guess it happens to most psuedo-intellecuals every once in a while, right?

I'll skip ahead to the part where I got home, as there wasn't that much else going on from lunch to the end of the school day. As soon as I got there, I immediately retreated to my room, my oasis, my sanctuary. You get the idea-- it was a place to avoid my parents. My room wasn't really like most other teenage rooms. I was a very minimalist person. I had very little decor inside. And everything--everything had to be clean. And it would stay that way, mainly because of the fact that I was the only one in my room anyhow. I never really invited people over to my house-- I never had people to invite in the first place. Anyhow, my room was pretty large for a teenager's room: there was a bed, computer with all the accessories, my fairly large TV, a clock hanging on the wall, along some Japanese scrolls. Or they were Chinese. I can't remember right now...
I let go of control of my body and went headfirst into the bed. I had been drained from being at school, not just physically, but emotionally as well. Ross...It just made me want to pick up my book and start writing...

 The red book. The book of my secrets. I had gotten it from a friend since around a couple of years ago. At first, I had relatively little use for it, but I became fonder of it once I saw its potential. It was used to retain important (and not so important) information about my life, what was going on in it, around it, and so on.
I booted up the computer and waited for it to load. Usually I would do my homework on my computer, while afterwards I would write something in my book/journal and go to sleep. Today wasn't the case. Something inside of me told me to get this done first.
I picked up the pen and started to write.

I see Ross inside of my dreams. In these dreams, I can feel him kissing me. I can sense that he's completely naked. I can feel him mounting me, preparing to go inside of me. I can feel that slight sense of penetration. Only in my dreams, it's much, much sweeter. Which is what makes me wake up at the end. Damn.

Stop. -brief pause-

Do I like Ross? Why didn't I realize that I actually liked the bastard a little? I have a slight crush on him, don't I?

STOP, my brain told me. I realized that I was going into a brick wall with the topic that I was writing about. Crap, it figures this would happen to me.
Then I remembered I `d already set up a date with him.

Just to tell you, when Ross said Friday, he meant tomorrow. I was sitting through class, ready to crack at the thought that this was my first actual date. Now, this was my first date only because I didn't want to date. It wasn't like I was so non-datable that no one would want to date me in the first place. I just chose to remain at arms' length.
I didn't even look at Ross for the entire time we were in class together. I was too afraid of something coming out of my mouth that wasn't supposed to...
I should have known better than to let a guy get a hold of me like that, I though to myself,
and we're not even dating!
The whole thing had become so bizarre that it was just confusing. A rivalry that turned into fantasy that turned into a neutral friendship that could turn into a one night stand...
Well, at least that wouldn't be so bad.
I still didn't know if he was gay or not. Most gay people would probably look at me and say that I'm a disgrace to the brotherhood. Well, my gaydar's broken, ok? Get off my case. I recognized a couple of the smoke screens that he had sent me, but -
" John."
Ross. Speak of the devil.
" Oh, um, hey man." I replied, trying not to stutter.
I had clicked my heels in my ruby red slippers. They had taken me to the end of the school day.
We were at the front entrance of the school.
" So, can you make it?" he asked me.
"...Yeah, guess so." I said sheepishly.
" Ok, cool man. Be here at 7." And off he went.
I took my fingers and rubbed them in my hair in frustration. What in the hell had I gotten myself into..

Ok ok, it's 7. I know I don't have that much of a life, that's why I skipped a lot. But this day was important. I was waiting at the school in my I'm-trying-oh-so-hard-to-look-cool clothes, looking around for Ross to come get me. I know that it's silly, but since in my usual attire I would have been stoned out of the place, I though I might as well put a little effort into the whole thing.
I saw Ross' car coming to pick me up. And I tried to tell myself that if I didn't do anything , neither would he.
Of course, I was assuming that he would be alone, he didn't mention anyone else...
Until now.
When the car was in front of me, I realized that he wasn't by himself. Not only that, but the person wasn't just a friend:
it was his girlfriend.
Well, so much for that.
" Hey John, you're here," Ross said. "Um, this is my friend Jen. Jen, this is John," Pointing to the blond-haired girl sitting next to him. As if anyone else mattered.
" Hi," she said in a happy, cheerful voice. Great, not only is she a bitch to me already, she's a perky bitch as well.
" You can get in the back, we've stopped for gas and all. Come on, let's go," he said to me as I got behind his seat. I knew that this day was going to be one of the most fucked up days of my life - I just didn't realize how yet. I didn't know that I would try to re-create my personality just for the hell of it. I didn't realize that basically, the actions from then were the start of the actions that put me where I'm at now...
Fuck me for not being so self-observant.

Yeah, wasn't that an ok, short chapter? Well, shorter than most I've written. I think that writing at 12' in the morning is not a good idea anymore. ^_^ I don't have anything really important to say or anything like that. E-mail me at (some people who haven't gotten anything from my mailing list should re-submit their addy's...) 3rd chapter will me done next millennium. Don't hold your breath. ^_~ j/k. Anyway, hope you liked the story...

C-ya later! ^_~