Losing To Win III
"Hard To Swallow"
By Joey E

Hey, hey! Here is the third installment of "Losing To Win", a totally fictional gay high school story. I'd like to thank all the readers who have responded so far. It's always good to hear from readers when I write a new story like this one. Special thanks goes out to John, for encouraging me to keep writing this part. As always, this is copyrighted 2003. All rights reserved. If you are under 18 (or 21 in some areas), don't read this story. If you are turned off by high school boys learning about life and love, then don't read this story.

He broke away from the kiss almost immediately. He looked at me in horror. I could still feel his tender lips upon mine. He wiped his lips off with the back of his hand and turned away from me.

"Why did you do that?" he asked, softly.

"Josh, turn around," I said, equally as soft.

"No, why did you do that?" he asked.

"I don't know, dude, it just felt like the right thing to do, man. I'm sorry," I said.

He turned around. He had tears running down his cheeks. He took his glasses off and wiped the tears away. I looked up at his face and I saw the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen in my life. I let out a small gasp.

"Fuck, now you're gonna tell everyone in school that I, that I..."

"No way, bud. Don't worry. I'm not going to tell anyone about what just happened."

He looked at me through the tears in his eyes.

"It hurts so much," he said, sitting down next to me.

I put my muscular arm around him. At first, he resisted.

"Josh, I'm here, bro," I said, softly. The tears were starting to come to me too.

He gradually leaned into me and I wrapped my arms around him as he cried in my shoulder. I felt his tears soaking my shirt.

"Just let it out, man, just let it out," I said, choking back my own tears. It wasn't like me to cry. But for some reason, I could feel this guy's pain.

"Why, Steve, Why?" he asked in his tears.

I said nothing. But secretly, I was thinking I don't know. I don't know why I was drawn to him. I didn't know what I was doing. It hit me like a ton of bricks then and there. I couldn't just leave him there like this.

He finally stopped and looked up at me. I looked down at his beautiful eyes.

"Why are you treating me like this? You don't even know me. Hell, you don't even like me! All you want is for me to help you with physics and then you'll toss me to the side like everyone else does," he said, getting up.

As soon as he got up, I noticed something missing. He was warm and comfortable in my arms. I knew that it was something I had felt before with a girl, but not as strongly, and certainly not as intense. I was realizing that I had feelings for this kid. Strong ones. Maybe I had been watching him subconsciously all this time. Maybe I had fallen in love with him.

"Josh, listen. Sit down beside me, dude," I said, softly, patting the spot next to me. He sat down next to me again.

"I just can't tutor you, Steve. I can't do that to myself . It would be shear torture, man!" he said.

"Dude, are you paying attention to anything that's happening here? I, Steve Edison, the fuckin' pticher of the school baseball team, just fuckin' kissed you!"

"Yeah, so? Are you gonna stick up for me? No. Are you going to kiss me again? Probably not. What do I get out of it?"

"Oh, I won't kiss you again?" I asked.

He made an effort to break free at first, but with my firm hold on him, he wasn't going anywhere. I just had to kiss him again. This time I felt his mouth open, slightly, and I shoved my tongue inside. He fought back with his tongue and I eagerly sucked it into my mouth. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled his body into mine. He was breathing heavier and so was I. I broke the kiss this time.

He looked at me, with a straight face. It slowly turned into the biggest grin I had ever seen on his face.

"You like me don't you?" he said, smiling.

I shook my head yes.

"Wow," was all he said, as he looked at me wide-eyed and grinning. (Sounds like a Dixie Chick song).

"I can hardly believe it myself, Josh. I can hardly believe it myself," I said, smiling down at his face.

He was beautiful to me. I took off his glasses again. He had the most gorgeous eyes I had seen on another living human being, female or male. I got lost in them again.

"You don't smile much, do you?" I said, running my hand through his hand. He was still standing in front of me.

"No reason to, man."

"How about I give you one?" I asked, smiling at him.

He sat down next to me on the couch again. He rested his hand on my leg. "Steve, do you realize how many times I've thought about you?"

"I have to say, it's probably more than I've thought about you," I answered smartly.

He laughed. "Yeah, probably. So now what?"

I took a deep breath. "I have no idea, bro. I appreciate you helping me out with my physics and all. I just usually go with the flow, man. But this, this is different."

He wrapped his skinny arm around me and snuggled up against my chest. I wrapped my arm around him and held him tight. He did feel so good next to me. I hated to admit it, but he did. What was I doing?

Reality was coming back to me. "What are we doing, Josh?" I asked seriously.

He looked up at me. "I don't know. Do you think you're gay?"

"I don't know. I know I like being with Jill and all, but with you it's different. Do you think you can handle me being with her still? Please dude, I know I'm being an asshole, but I can't face this whole thing head on by myself."

He looked hurt. Very hurt. But, then he looked up at me and said, "As long as I can have you too. It'll be all right."

Though I knew someone would get hurt in the end, it would be all right for now. I just hoped it wouldn't be me. Greedy and selfish I know.

"So, you wanna get to physics now?" I asked, slapping him lightly on his thigh.

"Are you kidding? You just told me you liked me. Do you think I'll be able to handle it now?" he asked, smiling.

He then climbed on top of my lap and pressed his lips on to mine. This time, he grabbed onto the back of my head and kissed me passionately. Damn, this kid could kiss well. I felt my cock rising up as he rubbed up against it. He looked into my eyes and smiled.

"Something come up?" he asked. He looked so innocent. Though we were the same ages, he looked so much younger than I was.

I blushed. It had been so long since I blushed I didn't know I still could. I felt like this was something brand new, which it was. And wondered why I had been so blind to it before?

"Josh, you are so fuckin' hot, bro," I said, wrapping my arms around him and kissing him hard. I lifted him up and moved so that he would be on the couch and I above him. I felt his cock press up against my stomach as I kissed him. From the feel of it, he had a nice-sized one actually. Which surprised me. I don't know why, but it surprised me.

He smiled at me and pushed up. I got up off him. He then surprised me and started to take off my t-shirt. I looked at him in weird way, and he must've taken it as a bad thing because he stopped. I then helped him take it the rest of the way off me. His eyes were wide, and he had a huge grin on his face.

"Can I touch it, Steve?" he asked, softly.

I took a hold of his hand and pressed his hand on my smooth, muscular chest. I had worked hard on my body over the years and was damn proud of it. What's more, I was sort of turned on by the fact that my body was turning Steve on. He suddenly became the strong one and started unbuttoning my jeans. I looked down at him. He had a determined look on his face and I smiled down at him. I slowly helped him unzip my jeans and out popped my 7.5 incher. Standing full at attention. He started stroking it immediately. There was already some precum oozing out of it. He gently rubbed the head of my cock with it and it felt hot!

I moaned softly. He took his finger off my cock and put it in his mouth.

He smiled at me and said, "Hm, not bad!"

He then swooped down in my lap and started licking the head of it gently with his tongue. I suddenly got impatient.

"Just suck it bro!" I said, rather loudly.

He looked at me, shocked, but went down on my cock. He took the damn thing all the way down his throat on the first try.

He looked back up at me after he took it out. He flashed a grin I was getting used to seeing.

"I guess all that practice paid off," he said.

I looked at him like he was crazy. He stopped laughing and went back to business on my now throbbing cock. I took a look down on it, wet with his saliva. I couldn't believe I was letting a guy suck my own cock. I grabbed the back of his head and gently pushed his face down on my cock again.

"Aw, man," I whispered. "Fuck, that feels fuckin' good!"

I could tell my words of encouragement helped as he sucked harder and faster. I ran my hand through his strawberry-blonde hair. It was so fuckin' soft and nice to touch. I couldn't believe I was doing this. This was fuckin' insane....I shouldn't be doing .....agh....it feels so good though...

He was doing so well in fact, that I felt my balls rising. I grabbed on to his head and forced him down on it. I knew I was going to pop. He just kept sucking.

I yelled out in a moment of extreme pleasure and I shot right in his mouth. His eyes flashed up at me as he was surprised with the warm liquid in his mouth. He tried to get up off of it, but for some reason, I couldn't let go. The pleasure was just too intense. I lost control of my body.

I finally let go of the back of his head and he violently took his mouth off my cock. He looked hurt. He didn't quite know what to do with the load in his mouth. Suddenly, I came to what I thought were my senses. I panicked. I just let another dude suck my cock! What the hell? I looked at him, his face looked so hurt. He just sat there in front of me. I put my cock back in my jeans and buttoned up. I got up and zippered my fly. I only wanted out of there.

He stood up next to me. He was still had some of the load in his mouth. I saw it on his tongue.

"Dude I gotta go," I said, turning away from him. I couldn't even look at him.

"That's it?" he asked, softly.

"Dude, I gotta go, man," I said, grabbing the keys out of my pocket.


"Fuck," I said to myself softly, "I just can't stay here, bro. God I don't know what I'm doing."

I was absolutely in a panic. He grabbed me by the biceps and looked me straight in the eye. The next thing I knew, he spit the rest of my cum out at me. It landed on my face, a direct hit. I immediately tried to wipe it off my face. I made a fist and aimed it at him, with my arm pulled back.

"That's for being a fuckin' asshole. Now fuckin' get out!" he yelled.

I just punched the palm of my other hand. I got the fuck out of there, and never turned back. I got into my car, revved the engine and peeled out down the street. I was so disgusted with myself. I let a dude suck me off. I have a girlfriend. I drove aimlessly for a while. My mood had changed over the time. I had come up with a plan. Since he fuckin' spit my load on my fuckin' face, I was going to see that he fuckin' paid for it. Physics didn't matter anymore. Fuckin' faggot. I finally ended up at Joey's house.

His mom answered the door.

"Yeah, is Joey there?"

"Sure, come in, Steve," she said, smiling. She turned and yelled up the stairs, "Joe, Steve's here."

Joe came bumbling down the steps. The dumb shit always smiled.

"Steve, what's up? Come on up. I was just playing Grand Theft Auto," he said.

"I thought you said you were doing homework," his mom said.

"Uh, yeah, I was, before," Joe answered.

"Uh huh," his mom said, before turning and walking away.

We went up to his room. I sat down on his bed. He sat down at his desk.

"I let him suck me off," I said out of the blue.

"WHAT?" Joe exclaimed. "You what??"

"Dude he wouldn't leave me alone. Finally I just let him have it. I mean I figure what's the harm? I was horny, he had a mouth, let him suck me."

"Aw, man," Joe said. "How could you let him suck you off?"

Ignoring the question, I went on. "Dude, I even blew my load in his mouth!"

As I was saying this, though, I felt bad. I was feeling worse and worse as my story went on. Saying it out loud made me realize what I did. I was pulled out of my trance with Joe cheering me on.

"Fuck yeah, dude. That's what you gotta do to a bitch, man. Blow it in their mouth!" he said.

I smiled at him, trying not to show my emotions. Fortunately, I am good at concealing my emotions, which was really being tested at this moment.

"Hell yeah, Joey!" I said, high-fiving him. I had to get out of there, fast. But there was no excuse for me to leave. Think Steve, think!

But before I knew it, I was involved in a game of Grand Theft Auto on Playstation 2. I could honestly play that game all fuckin' day and night if I let myself. I had a great time with Joe, just goofin' around, talking about whatever popped up in our 18-year olds minds.

"So, Jill ain't around this weekend eh?"

"No, she's not," I said. "And I wish she was man, I'm horny as fuckin' all hell."

He just laughed at me. "Why don't you just call up Josh again? I'm sure he'd be willing to do it again. All those gay guys are hungry for cock."

I just shot him a look without even thinking about it.


"Well, you're my best bud right?" I asked.

"Yeah, what's up?"

"I think I enjoyed it too much, dude," I said, looking down at the floor.

"You what?!" he asked as he jumped up.

I looked up at him and said, "I think I enjoyed it. I think." I wasn't even sure what I was doing.

"Dude," he said, putting his hand on my shoulder. I looked back at him. "Are you sayin' you liked a guy giving you head?"

I shrugged his hand off my shoulder and got up. "I don't know. I'm just confused."

Joe stayed silent as he often did when he wanted me to talk.

"Joe, I liked it. I like him, god damn it," I said in frustration. "There, I said it. I like him!"

Joe just looked at me wide-eyed. "Oh shit," he said.

"Yeah, how about that?" I asked, sarcastically.

Joe never took things too seriously. He always met challenges and brushed them off like nothing. He'd pick up the pieces and walk away clean. I knew that I'd be safe telling him my secret, since he was pretty open-minded about these things.

"Woah. I'm sorry, bro. The idea of you going after some school nerd is just insane. But come to think of it, Josh is sort of your type. Skinny, short, a red head..."

"All right, all right," I said, actually laughing.

"And come to think of it, he does have a killer ass. The only thing he's missing is some tits on his chest..."

"Shut up," I said, still laughing. I was relieved that Joe was taking this as well as he was.

"So, what are you going to do?" he asked, seriously.

"I have no clue, bud. I have no clue. I like Jill and all. She's the best thing that ever happened to me and..."

"So far," he said.

"So far, what do you mean?"

"Well, she's the best thing that happened to you so far," he said, smiling. "This Josh kid could be THE best thing. But do me a favor," he said.

I rolled my eyes, knowing that this was going to be a smart response.

"Don't involve me in this one," he said.

I gave him a questioned look.

"I mean, don't get me wrong, if you like dick more than you like pussy, hey it's cool with me. But just don't get me involved in your quest. I honestly don't know if I could take it."

"How could I possibly get you involved?" I asked.

"Well, you certainly tried to get me involved with helping you get Jill to notice you. Remember what happened?"

I laughed suddenly, remembering what exactly did happen. "Dude, was it my fault that you got caught in the girl's locker room?"

"Well you were the brilliant one who came up with the idea. And it sounded like a good idea, until I was caught."

"Dude, all you got was detention," I said.

"Yeah while you got the chick."

"Ah shut up!" I said.

"Well, anyway, I am not helping you out with this one."

"Aw, man, you have to!" I said, suddenly realizing that he could help me out.

He stayed silent for a few seconds. He appeared to be going over the whole situation in his head. Suddenly his eyes grew wide.

"Dude! You shot your load in his mouth and didn't even warn him?"

"Well, uh, yeah," I said, caught off guard.

"Aw, man, well, you probably ruined your chance right there."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"If you were taking some guys load and he shot it in your mouth without telling you, wouldn't you be a little pissed off?"

"I'd probably punch him in the face," I said. "Oh shit."

"Uh huh. So, now, how are you going to make up for it? Let him fuck you?"

He had a good point. I had set myself back instead of forward in this one. But we kept talking about possible solution. As we were talking, an idea of my own came into my head. I kept it a secret, and hoped it would work and the situation would arise that it would work.

After a long night of chatting, I left Joe's and went back home. I was lusting after the school nerd. Me. The fuckin' star pitcher of the baseball team. Me. The 6'2", 200lbs muscular, masculine jock. Me.

The weekend went by in a blur. Jill was away, and it was probably better that way. I knew I would have to face her on Sunday evening. But it was okay. I was going to keep that image up as long as possible, even though it may hurt Jill in the end.

Sure enough, she did call as soon as she got home on Sunday afternoon.

"Steve. I hope you're ready to come pick me up. I need to get away from my family!"

I laughed. "Okay, I'll be over in about a half an hour. We'll go get something to eat. I'm starving."

I picked her up in no time. There she was. The girl of my dreams. With her medium length blonde hair, her blue eyes, her perfect smile, and a body to kill for. As soon as she got in the car, I pulled her in gently for a passionate kiss on the lips. IT felt so real and familiar. I got hard instantly.

"Wanna go back to my house?" I asked, smiling. "The parents won't be home until this evening."

She laughed. Believe it or not, we had done everything but fuck. And I was content with that. She knew I was a hornball and was tolerant of it.

"Why?" she asked, as she grabbed my hard cock. "Mr. Happy a little excited?"

"Always, babe," I said, as I drove off.

We were back at my house in no time. As soon as I closed the front door, My hands were all over her sweet body. Her skin felt so soft and gentle. She wrapped her arms around me as we kissed. I felt her breasts press against my chest. I was in heaven. Or was I?

Thanks for stopping by. I hope you enjoyed this part of my series. If you have any comments, please send them to NEPhillyBoy76@aol.com Thanks!

Other Nifty Stories By Joey E
College Dan, The Man
College The Boy Behind The Mask
High School Collision
High School Chemistry
Adult Friends No Seduction Required
Beginnings Summer Construction