Date: Sat, 08 Jun 2002 05:29:41 -0500 From: Andy Smith Subject: Make It Love - Chapter 1 Disclaimer: This is a story about boys involved in romantic relationships and may include some sexual content. If this offends you, or you are not of legal age to read this material, you should leave now, if you choose to read further, you do so at your own discretion. Authors Note: This is a collaborative work. Some of you may remember an earlier work I recently submitted to the Nifty Archive, Ronnie Series (boyzheart@hotmail.com), found in the High School section. In the course of that work, I met so many wonderful friends. Your response and support of that work was nothing less than incredible. It was from that story that I met a delightful friend, who began revealing to me this absolutely endearing and beautiful story. He has asked me to work with him in the telling of it. The results are what you will begin reading today. For privacy and protection, the names have been changed. We will not reveal until the end if this is a true story or a combination of truth and fiction. What we ask is that you enjoy and hopefully have an opportunity to smile along the way. There will be some painful elements, and some beautiful moments, but after its finished, we trust you will be warmed with the glow of a radiant relationship and budding romance. Make It Love Chapter 1 - New Friends Red taillights brightened at the corner, then turned and faded out of sight. I stood there in the warm summer's evening breeze trying to mount my courage to go inside. Phillip, my brother who just dropped me off, encouraged me to come to this teen dance. It was just me and Mum at home now, Phillip came round all the time to look in on us and make sure we were ok. Anyway, he said I needed to get out and make more friends and stuff, said I was driving him and Mum crazy moping around all the time. The flyer said this was a teen dance for this area, only kids up to 17 allowed, no "rents", and plenty of adult sponsors, all the best new muze .. . it sounded like it was gonna be a blast. The thing is, he didn't know it was designed for gay and lesbians only - or he would have never let me go. He knows I'm gay, but he wouldn't like me hanging out with other gay boys, it makes him sorta spooky. He says its just a phase I'm going through .. I think he just didn't want it to be true, but . . .. The Dance was in the old skating near the heart of town. The local police department organized the dance - so no booze and drugs and stuff was allowed. There was already lots of peeps, cars coming and going, definitely a happening place tonight. I just sort of blended into the door with the next wave of kids. The music was pounding on the inside and you could hear it all the way outside. The flyer said to bring your ID if you wanted to get in, but there was the big guy checking ID's and stuff at the door on all the teens that seemed close to the age limit. If he thought you were below 17 he didn't hassle you too much. He was passing out a flyer with all the rules for the night, like no drinking, drugs, fighting, sexual contact, stuff like all that. It said that the adults would be all around, on the dance floor and everything and they were not allowed to touch the kids. Unwanted touches were strictly forbidden and grounds for immediate removal from the dance. That's cool, last thing I need tonight is some 30 year old perv tryin to mess with me. Maybe I should tell you about me. My name is Nathan, only some peeps call me Nate, I really don't like it, but what can you do? I am 15, and not very tall, about 5'-9" and I have medium brown hair that I keep trimmed pretty good, I wear it sorta spiked with gel. My eyes are chocolate brown with dark eyebrows, lots of peeps tell me they are way hot, but I don't see it. Nice body if I say so myself. . toned, but not bulked up. I don't get into sports too much, I mostly ride my bike lots and my skateboard and stuff, so I stay fit .. plenty of exercise. That means I usually have a decent tan, makes peeps turn their heads to follow me when I'm walking through a room and stuff. I picked out my best clothes for the party. I had been looking forward to this for days, and even Phillip was sorta glad that I may meet some new friends. I chose my black tee shirt, tan board shorts, and by best Nike's .. you know. . . the really cool white ones like Aaron Carter's. Now, I got the hair just right and . .well . .here I am. Philip said I was dressed to impress tonight, and not to bring home to many girls .. ha! Sorta embarrassing for your big brother to be going there you know! Making my way into the big skating rink that was now converted to a dance floor, I had to push past several crowds of teenagers. It was way dark in the huge room. The dance floor was immediately in front of the entrance; the only light was coming from the canteen area just to the left of the entrance. It was raised from the dance floor so you could see everything from there. The only uniformed officer was up there so he could see, and be seen. Lots of guys and girls were gathered around there, and sorta scattered in groups all over. There had to be at least 300 kids, I had no idea there was this many gay kids in this area. Man, I was nervous as ever, and scared, and I was all sweaty . .this whole thing was about to make me explode. I wanted to be here . .I was excited about what might happen . . but I was sooo afraid to be here too. I wanted to come tonight, but I still had a few doubts of why I should be here. Like, what if someone from my school was here? I reasoned out that that was silly because if they were gay and went to my school, the last thing they were gonna say at school was who they saw at the teen gay and lesbian dance last Friday. But still, how weird would it be to walk up to one of your schoolmates at a gay dance? Not sure I wanna go there, you know what I mean? Then, there is this big problem I have see, I have known I am gay for almost three years, Phillip says he understands but doesn't want me stuck with any labels - he says to just live life and follow my heart. But the thing is I have a boyfriend. Yeppers, a real live gorgeous, powerful, fantastic boyfriend. We've been together almost three years now. His name is Brett, and I am soooo in love with him. He is like my breath, my life. I love the way he holds me, and the safe feeling I get when he's holdin me. He is 6'-2", light brown curly hair and green eyes, and is 17 years old. He is really strong and has the perfect body - all of it! And the thing is, he's mine! So, why do I need to be here? That is what I am wrestling with; I don't want another boyfriend, I have the best - no interest in another. But Phillip keeps sayin how I need to make new friends and stuff. I guess he is right, I can't be with Brett all the time. But that is all want, a friend. I'm not gonna let myself get too close to anyone here. I figure if I meet a couple of cool dudes and stuff, Phillip will leave me be about it, and I can have someone to talk to when Brett is at work and stuff. That is why I am here. Actually, its really funny, all the boys are hangin together, and all the girls are hangin together . .. then it dawns on me like a switch turning on - it's a gay/lesbian dance . . I guess that is how the group is gonna sorta work out. I smile a bit at my realization. The music was way loud, and I was just walking around trying to blend in. I didn't see many peeps I know. I did recognize a few of the older kids I had seen from the neighborhood, but I don't know any of them. I got a coke from the canteen and kept walking around, checking out all the hotties, but there was a few weirdoes and creeps in the crowd too. I decided to steer clear of the undesirerables. I know lots of the older guys are checking me out. I'm smaller then most, and some see me as an easy mark. I was avoiding a couple of guys, when I bumped into this girl from my school! She said she never would have suspected me of being gay, said that a lot of the girls talk about me all the time - saying how cute I am and all. I blushed the appropriate shades of read and sorta just melted back into the crowd. Man, that was weird, I mean, girls liking me - yuck! Over to one side, back near the canteen was this big crowd of girls. There in the middle of them was this small boy, no way he could be 15, he was by far he shortest dude here. I positioned myself around so I could see him better. He was wearing this faded pink shirt and yellow board shorts - too strange a combination for most peeps, but on him it was adorable. He was around 5'-3" and about 110 pounds, and blond hair, way cute! He had the sweetest smile, it sorta lit his whole face up when it spread easily over his face. I was immediately attracted to him, but then . . so was just about everyone in the building. My chances of hooking up with him were about exactly zero. But wait, why am I saying he is cute? I don't need this, I've gotta move around. I gotta quit looking at this cute kid. Grrrr. I found a safe place and just sat watching the couples dancing. There were all sorts of sights, like I said, there was a lot of gross guys there and stuff, but there was a lot of nice kids too. It was obvious which ones were there on the troll because you could see them going from kid to kid, and mostly getting rejected. Several of them came up to me, but I politely turned them down for a dance and stuff, I just wanted to watch. I kept noticing that these same guys would go up to that cute kid with the pink shirt and they would be trying to get him on the dance floor, or to go somewhere 'private' with them, no doubt what they had on their minds, but he seemed to be holding his own. I noticed that the girls were sorta protecting him, keeping the worst of his suitors away. I decided that I was glad I came tonight, this was gonna be a fun night! Somehow, I'm not sure how, I had managed to migrate back towards the circle of girls protecting the cute boy and I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. He looked to be 12 or 13, but I could tell that he was faking being happy. Believe me, I know what that is like . . . I can spot it a mile away. He was getting pretty low because there wasn't any kids there his age, everyone was older, and most were up to no good . .as far as getting with him was concerned. The thing was that he was getting a lot of attention, and there were some other kids who wanted to be center stage. They sorta got this competitive thing going, but I'm not sure the small dude wanted anything to do with it . .he looked as if he would just as soon blend in as be the center of attraction. Of course, I knew just what every other hot blooded guy there knew - he was just way too hot to ignore! So, this one big kid moves in to the group and comes over to the one boy who is trying to work his game and sits on his lap! The big kid is so much bigger than the boy that it hurts him and he let out a yelp, and dumped the big kid right out in the floor. All sorts of adult sponsors came out of nowhere to make sure everything was ok. Everyone got a big laugh out of it. I noticed that the cute kid wasn't all that happy, I could tell the boy was getting bummed out because of all the pervs trying to get into his pants. I decided that he could use a friend that would just talk to him and not be playing with his zipper. I was trying to figure out how to approach him when two girls walked up from the group. Little did I know, but these girls had already spotted me and decided that I looked way younger then lots of he others too, they were planning on a way to get me and him together. "Hi!" one of them said, "What's your name? I've never seen you at one of these before. My name is Krista." She said as she held her hand out for me to shake. The girls were dressed all in black or dark clothes. "Um .. Nathan." I replied, "I'm Nathan, and this is my first party like this." I took her hand and shook it, she was warm, it made me feel alive to touch someone . .even if it was a girl. "Nathan, hmmm, I like that, its cute . .like you!" she said while smiling genuinely. She seemed nice enough, and for some reason I didn't feel intimidated by her, or like she was after something so I relaxed a bit. It must have been obvious because she and her friend smiled and said, "It's ok, we aren't gonna jump your bones or nothing!" "Actually," the friendly one said, "We have someone we want you to meet. We've been watching and notice that you aren't into all these guys that are hitting on all the little guys here. See, we have this friend who just needs someone safe to hang with. His name is Josh . .Joshua . . see, he's right over there by the canteen," she turned slightly to indicate who she was talking about. Sure enough it was the cute kid in the pink shirt. I checked out what they were talking about and just sorta blushed a bit, I suppose I had a sheepish look on my face, because the broke out in huge grins. "So, do you want to meet him?" "Su .. sure," I stammered, blushing even more. "Cool!" And without a bye-your-leave they grabbed me up by the hands and arms and practically drug me over to the girl's circle and they absorbed me into the inner circle. It was almost frightening, but I relaxed pretty quick as they were really watching out for the younger guys and keeping the worst of the weirdoes out, unless a kid seemed to want to talk or something. Josh saw me, a broad warm smile swept over his face and he came over towards me. It was a sad smile really. I decided I needed to find out what was making this beautiful boy so sad. He seemed pretty nervous, but then, so was I. "Dude, your like the youngest kid here!" I said, as I offered my hand for a handshake. "Hi! I'm Joshua, but you can call me Josh," he said blushing and reached for my hand. His touch was electric, and he held on way longer than necessary for polite introduction. His eyes were powerful and seemed to draw mine to them . . . . we were swept away in an instant to a distant place and the music zoned out, the chatter and chaos of the crowded room waned, suddenly there was no one but he and I there, touching staring into one another's eyes. I knew then. Josh is the one. Somehow we broke the contact and we were both blushing as if we had just kissed or something in front of everyone. I heard some of the girls whispering, "aww . .how cute!" We made our way over to a table in the canteen area. We started talking about all sorts of things. It was obvious that we were going to be friends. Just what I hoped to find, a real friend; I am glad I came. "So, are you gonna tell me your name dude?" "Oh," I said, "Sorry, I'm Nathan." "Cool, Nathan . . I like that name," he still had that infectious smile. "So, I want to know all about you. What school do you go to? How old are you? How did you get here?" "Wait dude," I said, "Your goin way to fast!" He blushed, and it was my turn to smile. I answered his questions and the conversation was going really good. He wanted to know what sports I liked, and I told him I wasn't into that stuff too much. I like swimming and track, but not much else. "Cool!" he said, "I really like track too, and swimming!" Just then this really tall gangly kid walks up and taps him on the shoulder. He was sorta nerdy looking, with really thick glasses and goofy clothes. "Hey, do you wanna dance, or something?" "No, thank you though. Thanks for asking!" Josh was sooo polite and friendly. He could have been a jerk and told the guy to buzz off, but he was kind, even when he turned someone down. Everyone notice how polite and gentle he was. It was a real turn on for me. Another boy came up and wanted to dance with me. I was gonna turn him down but Josh nodded for me to go ahead and accept. I was torn. I really wanted to dance, but I was afraid that someone else would come up and dance with him. Reluctantly, I accepted. It was a really loud and fast song, I don't remember much about it other than I was wondering if Josh was alright. Immediately after the dance, I made my get away and got back to where I left him . .he was still there . . . smiling . . . waiting for me! The DJ put on some real romantic music so I decided it was time to see if he wanted to dance with me. I said, "Josh, wanna dance with me?" "Sure!" he said. And he jumped up from the table, grabbed me by the hand and drug me out to the floor. I held out my hands and he sort of melted into my arms and we started swaying to the music. I was in absolute heaven, the music was good, he was so hot, and he was so perfect in my arms, I was about to explode .. .my heart was booming in my chest . . . the warmth of our bodies, and the strong sensations cascading through our bodies ... much more and I would die. His hair, oh man his hair smelled like heaven. I definitely had a boner! I did most of the night after I saw him, but now I was leaking down there cuz just holding him this close, and smelling him, feeling him in my arms. . . man! I know he felt it too because of the way he held on so tight and buried his face in my chest. Neither of us said a word for the longest time, we just swayed with the music and held on. I couldn't believe that he was here in my arms! This gorgeous boy, the desire of everyone on the dance floor, and he was in my arms. Peeps were staring at us, but we really didn't care. He looked up into my eyes . . . there was a longing in them. I could sense he was searching for something, I just couldn't begin to understand what. It made me think about what I was doing, holding him. . I had a boyfriend .. I shouldn't be enjoying this so much .. . should I? But all I had to do was look into his eyes .. .. "Josh," I said while looking deep into his blue eyes, "Did anyone ever tell you that you're cute?" He blushed a beautiful shade of deep pink that could be noticed even out here on the darkened dance floor. "You could have anyone here in this building you want for a boy friend, you know." "Stop," he said, "You're embarrassing me. And besides, I am with the one I want to be with." He pulled me back to himself and we finished the dance in silence. I wondered what he meant by that. .could he already be falling for me? No way . .is there? No .. . but I sure do like when he says stuff like that. Hmmmm .. . . On the way back to find a table I asked him if he had a boyfriend. "No," he said with this sorta puppy dog look, "No, I don't have one yet." Hmmm, wonder what that could mean? See, I kinda figured he didn't because he was dressed so . . . casual, not dressed up like a date, like most of the other kids. I mean, his clothes looked good on him, but I could sorta tell. I found out later that this was his best outfit, I felt really bad about it, but that comes later on . . . We made our way over to the canteen area and found a table again. I tried to buy him some chips and a soda, but he beat me to it. It was so hot in there with all the peeps and dancing and stuff. Of course, some of it could be because of how hot Josh was - I could almost see the steam coming off of him . . .hehehe. We sat there and made eyes at each other for the longest time, until we both broke out in giggles over it. We watched the dancers out on the floor too, man . . it was so funny to watch one boy slap another because he was feeling him up or something. Some girls were slapping away a few of the boys too. We could see some of the bigger guys going from boy to boy asking for a dance, mostly getting turned down, but every now and then someone would get lucky and off they would go to the dance floor. It all seemed to be some sort of circular ritual or something, Josh and I certainly got a laugh or two over it all. Josh reached under the table and took my hand and held it. He placed both our hands in his lap. I was almost in shock. He kept rubbing his fingers back and forth on my palm and playing with my fingers. His touch was so warm and electric, it made me feel all fuzzy inside, my heart started beating faster and I could feel it pounding away. I was looking at him, and man . . I sprung bone big time. My hand sorta brushed over his crotch and I felt his boner too. I moved my hand really quick, and he gave me the cutest smile and his eyes were twinkling. This was too intense and I shouldn't be getting boned up over a friend. My mind was racing . . I had to get us up and out of there before anything else happened. As we got up from the table I sorta stepped behind him, I could tell he knew something made me uncomfortable, I just hoped he didn't see (or feel) my woodie." I'm not sure how many times we danced, but it was all night, mostly to the slow romantic ones. We would work our way to the outer edges and the darker areas so we could just go slow and hold each other. On one dance I had him wrapped up in my arms. His back was too my chest and he was soooo hot! I found myself holding on tighter and soon my fingers were just under the waistband of his shorts, you know, I was using them to sorta rest my hands on. I got caught up in the moment and I pushed down slightly on his shorts. I just wanted to be closer to him, but I wasn't really gonna touch him down there. He put his hands on mine and stopped me. I froze. He looked at me like he just lost me. Man I was embarrassed and so ashamed. My face was blushed with shame, and I pulled away. I wanted to crawl into a hole, but there wasn't one, so was going to run away. I could imagine what was running trough his head.. . I was no different from the rest. .I was only after one thing .. god how STUPID of me! Panic swept over me, I was about to cry. He pulled me back into his arms and looked me in the face, "Please don't go, it's ok." "Oh man, J.. Josh . . .I am sooo sorry, really! I didn't mean that and I didn't mean to hurt you. I wouldn't do anything to hurt you." I was about to bust out in tears myself because I really didn't want him to think I was like everyone else, I wasn't after what I could get from him, but it was so intense holding him in my arms . . . it just happened, I was so embarrassed. He just pulled me to him and told me to forget it and dance. I had to go to the toilets after that dance, had to blow my nose cuz it was all stuffed up . . .and umm . .I had to take a piss. I had been leaking so much down there cuz of how hot he made me that I needed to let things kinda breath and dry out. After I cleaned up a bit, I made my way back out to the benches where he was waiting for me. He smiled at me and I immediately melted and here comes my boner back again. . damn! I wanted to wash up cuz of the smell on my fingers after holding myself and all .. but I had to hurry out to him before he thought I wasn't coming back. I had to wait like for ever for an empty toilet .. no time .. I had to get out there! We danced several more times. Often he would dance with his back to my chest, and I would wrap my arms around him. It was so hot, that he carried his drink out on the floor and would sip it and snuggle into my body. Every now and then he would look up as if to see if I was still there, or if it was really true. I started getting a woody with him pressed so close to me. I had to stop before it got out if hand. I just wanted a friend, and this was getting way to hot, way to fast. He was looking up into my eyes with this intense look like he wanted to kiss me. Time stopped. My ears started burning, my heart stopped eating, I quite breathing . . .he leaned up slightly . . .I leaned towards him . . but suddenly I pulled away. He was instantly hurt and wanted to know what was wrong. "What's wrong, I thought you came here cause you wanted a boyfriend?" "Josh," I said, " I like you . . lots, but I already have a boyfriend see." "Oh," he said. I could see the disappointment in his eyes, then tears began to well up and he said, "I'm sorry .. I didn't know." "Look," I said, "Don't cry. I want us to be friends. Here, let me give you my phone number and you give me yours so we can stay in touch." I smiled my warmest smile and squeezed him in a hug. The look on his face was priceless. He hugged me really tight and I think he did cry a bit into my chest. The dance ended and we shuffled off the floor and headed for the canteen. His phone rang, it was his mum, she was coming after him because it was getting late. He said ok, and the "I love you's" and stuff and hung up. "Dude, I gotta go home now," he was so down. "Like right now?" "Yup, in a out 15 minutes my mum will be here," the sadness very evident in his voice, he wouldn't look up at me. I pulled him up and hugged him really quick and said, "Come on, we got time for one more dance anyway!" So we danced. We didn't talk, we danced. I made him turn to face me so I could look into his blue eyes some more. There was something so compelling in them, something that seemed to draw me deep into them. I looked at him and he looked at me and there was magic. Like we knew it was for real, that we had really found each other. There was no way for us to say it all then, but our eyes knew it . . . that dance still burns in my memory . . . I don't ever intend to lose it. I held his hand and we made out way to the front. Once outside we waited for his mum to show. We were both kinda nervous and didn't quite know what to say. Josh was thinking about how he should have known that all he wanted was a friend, and that he had pushed Nathan away for good when he tried to kiss him. Now he was going to be like all the rest and just go away and leave him alone and friendless all over again. These thought were overwhelming him and tears began to slowly fall from his eyes. Me . . . I saw his tears and that did it. He was awesome, and incredible, and huggable, and . . beautiful. I had to make him know it was gonna be ok . . but how? I wondered just what was happening behind those blue eyes. Just as his mum pulled up, he pulled me into a hug and stepped up on his tip-toes and kissed me on the check. His lips were warm and soft. "You're my Prince," he said, as he looked me deep in the eyes. I was in sort of a daze, I couldn't respond, only stare back in those deep blue eyes that were sparkling and full of life and love. . . did I say love??? I hugged him really tight and whispered in his ear, "Please call me. . please! I promise I will call you too .. I don't want to loose you!" As I pulled away from him we both looked in each others eyes and we knew we'd see one another again .. we just knew. He slid in the car and I shut the door and watched as the red tail lights pulled away, stopping at the end of the street, turned, and fade slowly out of sight . . . my fingers still touching the warm place on my cheek where his sweet lips kissed me. Well, there it starts . . . please let us know what you think. This is another first; my first collaborative effort, and my friends first time to tell a story. So, we anxiously await your feedback. I have set up a joint email address so that both of us can monitor your responses. We will answer all emails. Thanks for reading! Reach us at: makeitlove@hotmail.com Andy, and Nathan