Date: Mon, 1 May 2000 21:38:18 -0500 From: Willy B Subject: Mile High part 2 Mile High Part 2 "Kevin, ugh Kelvin, my name is Lisa. I'm a paramedic." "No, leave the mask on. It's only oxygen." Kelvin felt hands on his arms pulling them away from his face. Through the pain and fear he looked into the face of the older woman hovering within his vision. He still couldn't breath, couldn't these people understand? What was that stupid mask for again? `I need you to relax and lay still for me." she said looking at the green near panicking eyes of the bloody youth. She took a deep breath. She hated calls involving kids and teens most of all. No one this young should ever need to go through this, she railed against the universe internally. "Listen to me, listen, listen, we're going to check for any other problems, Stay still and don't worry we'll keep you covered." Lisa looked up to check the progress of her crew mates as they proceeded cutting the rest of Kelvin's clothes away from his body. Most boys Kelvin's age, she knew from experience, would be extremely shy even through the pain they were feeling. "Kelvin, it's OK. Lay flat. I need you to keep your legs down. You need to trust me, we'll keep you covered." "I'll tell you everything we're doing." As she continued her quiet monologue, she was pleased to see Kelvin's eyes seem to grow calmer. "Good boy, good boy." she reassured him as she began her secondary assessment of his condition. "Mr. Bauchamp," Mrs. Lukes the school councilor who had helped him that morning said. "Christopher, please go to the auditorium with the other students." Chris, still on his knees where he'd fallen when he realized how hurt his friend was, looked up at her through his tear strained eyes. "Please Mrs. Lukes," he began, fighting to get his words out, "Kel's the only friend I've got here. I can't leave!" "OK Christopher." she said as she waved off the other teachers and staff, busily reestablishing control and placed her arm around the shaking boys shoulders. She was at a loss about what to do and could be wrong and pay for it later but at that moment her conviction told her Chris needed to be where he was. Chris turned back to see his friend being rolled onto a backboard by the ambulance crew, an I.V. in each arm now. "Why wasn't I there?" Chris whispered aware of his friend on the other side of the glass, so alone, surrounded by all those people trying to help him. Mrs. Lukes just tightened her hold on Chris and stayed with him, wondering again if this was such a good idea.... "This is Kelvin Stuart." Lisa began as she lead the stretcher into the emergency treatment room. "He's a sixteen year old male, victim of a severe beating at school...." There was a slight stirring among the staff at that announcement. They were used to car wrecks and the occasional farm accident. Lisa continued with her report, holding Kelvin's arm wishing away the renewed fear he had to be feeling. "...chief complaint at this time, difficulty breathing, also he has possible diminished breath sounds on the left. last vital signs are...." "I want x-ray, blood, foley, CT...." The rest of the doctor's barked orders were lost on Kelvin as he lay nude on the hard backboard in the treatment room. He was only aware of Lisa as she bent down to whisper in his ear. "See you later cutie. Remember what I told you was going to happen when we got here, trust them and let them do their work." "OK" Kelvin mouthed, it was too painful to try to speek. Lisa took a moment to stroke her hand through his short curly blood streaked hair and stepped out of the way. The rest was a blur of activity, embarrassment and pain as they began the process of making him healthy. Chris looked up at the stage from the seat he had been led to after the ambulance left. A very agitated coach Martini still dressed in his blood stained clothes stood at the front flanked by two police officers, one of whom was a State Trooper. He had just given his statement to the officers and now looked around at the sea of subdued young faces in the audience. He had broken up student fights before but none as bad as this appeared to be. The three football players he and his assistants pulled away from Kelvin had acted like they really wanted to kill him. The fact they were in custody didn't help the shame he felt that he didn't know something like that was going on. "Rumors, damn it to hell!" he whispered under his breath. Why did any thing like this have to happen on his watch. He sighed and once more thought maybe it's time to do something else for a living. "Who knows what is true anymore and why should any one care! Rumors!" Kelvin could be a pain sometimes, thought coach Martini, but he had to admit he was actually fond of the little shit. Mrs. Lee the school principle stepped up to a podium that had been hastily erected on stage. "I would like to inform you that the last word we have from the hospital is that Mr. Stuart will live." She paused to let that news sink in. One more rumor quashed. "These officers," indicating the serious looking uniformed men in the room "will be interviewing each of you before you leave here today. In order to speed things up, I will ask again, does any one have any information that will shed some light on today's incident?" Chris's heart began to pound in his ears as he looked around the room. No one else was going to be the first to break the invisible wall between the students and the adults in the auditorium, especially with the cops there. Chris's gaze fell on Mrs.Lukes and they locked eyes. Me? he thought. What could he add to what they thought they already knew? Chris closed his eyes. Kel's bloody image was all he saw. He looked again at Mrs. Lukes, her eyes seemed to look right through him. She just gave him a slight smile. He made up his mind. he'd failed his friend once but never again. Oblivious to everything but the look she returned him, heart pounding (He'd never been forced into leadership before), he raised his hand. Chris could feel everybody's stares burning through him, the new kid, but the ice was broken, others soon followed. Mr. and Mrs. Stuart, Kel's parents, sat on either side of his bed holding his hands as they silently watched him in a pain killer induced sleep. The doctor had done his best to reassure them about Kelvin's condition. He explained their son's injuries in details that were mostly lost on them. All they heard was he had numerous broken ribs, his left lung though bruised hadn't been punctured, thankfully, but he had inhaled a great deal of his own blood from his facial injuries. The doctor also explained his intention to keep Kelvin in the hospital until he was sure that Kel would not develop a pneumothorax (collapsed lung as they learned later). Each was lost in their own thoughts watching their son, the deep purple bruises and stitched up forehead quite evident, his badly discolored chest hidden beneath the wraps they had placed around him to stabilize his ribs. They had been rocked that morning by the call from their son's school. It didn't make any sense. What the State Trooper had told them about the probable reason for the attack was troubling to them but nothing presented as much terror as the thought of losing their youngest child. "You know" said Mrs. Stuart, breaking the stillness `I always thought if something ever happened to him it would be up in the air, not like this." "I know honey, but he's always been so good, so careful...." Mr. Stuart replied softly, unable to continue. "What if..., what if what that trooper said is true?" she continued. "He's our son." he said "If anything else comes from this, we'll cross that bridge if or when we come to it." Like most pilots Kelvin's dad preferred to handle situations that developed one at a time. The first he could handle just by being there. the second, if there was a second, he couldn't do anything about at the moment. He felt the solution would eventually be the same, however, he would be there for his son. A slight tapping at the door drew his attention away from his son. He and his wife looked up to see Chuck Bauchamp standing in the doorway with a tall blond teenager. "Can we come in?" Charles asked. "Sure." Kel's dad answered. "Who's this? Chris?" as recognition occurred "when did you? how did you know?" Chris stepped around his dad and crossed over to Kel's bed. "I moved here last week." he said, his voice still broken and horse "I supprised Kelvin this morning." "He must have been overjoyed to see you again." Mrs. Stuart said as she reached out to Chris. "We couldn't pry you two apart with a crowbar the last summer you were here." Chris smiled , thinking of the mischief he and Kelvin were involved in staying one step in front of airport security. His smile, however, was fleeting as he examined his friend's battered features. "Is he go'na be OK?" `Yes Chris, he's out of danger now. He'll be just fine." Kel's parents answered. "I'm sorry!" Chris managed to croak out, damn he didn't want to be a baby in front of Kel's parents. "About what?" Mr. Stuart asked, although he suspected the reason. He was very familiar with survivors guilt, as it was called, having buried many friends during his years in experimental aviation. "I wasn't there to stop this. I wasn't there for him!" Chris's last words came out in a rush like he was afraid he would die if he held them in and die if he didn't. "Stop it!" Mr. Stuart snapped. Young men always had such overly romantic ideas of what they should have done and be capable of. He knew, he'd had the same ideas years ago. "Stop it." softer "There was nothing you could have done, except find yourself in the same condition or worse." "I don't know why those people did this but they'd have just shown up in greater numbers." He reached out and embraced Chris in a bear hug. "Promise me you'll stop blaming yourself. Just be there for him now that he's safe." "Would you like to sit with us?" he finished releasing his son's friend. Chris looked at his father who just nodded and gave him the "don't be any trouble" look. "I'll call you when they tell me I have to go dad." That said, Christopher joined the vigil at Kelvin's side and the small talk that took place there, interrupted only once by a nurse sent to drain the bag (the piss bag she called it) attached to Kel's foley. ( He had instinctively crossed his legs and gone white when he first heard what that was) Chris felt better, he would be there as long as allowed. . About eight that evening, Kelvin woke with a start. In his mind he had been running again, easily putting distance between himself and his pursuers. Then somebody tripped him! Cindy? "Kel? It's OK were here." "Mom? Dad?" he whispered quickly glancing at each. "Yes son. your safe, were here. So is Chris." Their son was back! Until he spoke to them Kel's parents had only their own private nightmares to keep them company. Yes! no matter what else came of this particular nightmare he would be there. "Chris?" Kel asked, finally focusing on the other person in the room. " How, How long?" "Just a few hours son." his dad replied. "how do you feel?" "hurts." Kelvin squeaked out. "I imagine it does son. Did you get the number of that truck?" Kel's dad asked, instantly rewarded by a slight smile from his son. At least today hadn't crushed his son's sense of humor no matter how lame his attempt at it was. "We'll get the nurse to bring you something for the pain." Kel's mom said as she reached for the call button. That would take care of the physical but Kel's dad needed to be sure of his son's mental well being as well. "Kel your mom and me want you to know that whatever happens now or in the future, you're our son and we'll always love you and be there." Kelvin looked from his mom to his dad and back. THEY KNEW! knew about the rumor that had put him there. And Chris was there too, he must have suspected something from this morning after all! Oh GOD he thought, his speech to the coach came flooding back. He couldn't bear the thought of disappointing other people but he was sure he was about to do exactly that to the people he most cared about! "Mom! Dad! Chris! I'm s,s,sorry, so sorry. oh god please don't hate me!" "Shhh, shhh, son, son we're here. We could never hate you. We are here and when you feel up to it we'll talk about what ever you may want to say but always know we love you. you don't have to worry about that." Kel's mom said as she gripped his hand like her baby could slip away at any moment and fighting back the terror of that thought. She reached out with her other hand to his cheek to intercept the tear that was slowly creeping down his skin. The fact she couldn't hug her son at that moment was torture. Chris leaned forward grabbing Kelvin's other hand. "I'll be here for as long as you want me to. I'm never going to let you face anything alone again!" Mr. Stuart was supprised, not by the overly dramatic tone of Chris's last statement, that was expected of a teenager, but by his son's reaction to what he had said. He felt he had screwed up somewhere but where? A thought hit him like a bolt out of the blue. Approval, ever since Kelvin was old enough to notice, he did everything possible to win his fathers approval. So much so , his dad tried to make sure his shadow (as his wife had called Kelvin) did what he did for himself and not for his father. If what the trooper had said was true, Mr. Stuart honestly didn't know if he would ever approve but one problem at a time. One at a time. "Kelvin," he began, looking his son in the eyes, "All we want is you home and healthy and for you to be you. When you begged me to teach you how to fly, I did, but only once I was sure it was your dream to do it and not out of some sense of obligation to me. Nothing will make me prouder than to have you just be who you are, whatever that turns out to be." He smiled at his son then "Unless you decide your an ax murderer, you know like that Jackson guy in those horror flicks." "His names Jason dad." Kelvin said finally smiling again. He knew his dad had probably mispronounced the name on purpose. But as long as he could remember his dad had always made things all right for him. "Ah the nurse is here with your shot! good night bud. Just relax we'll be here." Kel's mom interrupted. Chris stayed deep in thought during the trip home. his father thankfully stayed silent after his first few "Except for that, how was the play Mrs. Lincoln?" questions. Kelvin looked like he was going to be all right but with everything that was said by the school, cops and Kel's parents there were going to be long term consequences for everybody involved. And he was in it up to his eyebrows. He could only hope he wasn't in over his head. It was obvious he had made quite a few people if not everybody hate him when he raised his hand in the auditorium today. He hoped the troublemakers would be smart enough to lay low for a while. Maybe all this would blow over. All he really wanted was to be left alone. At his old school in Houston, even if he wasn't exactly part of the in-crowd, he was enough of a jock on the track and swim teams (not the "big" sports of football and basketball) to be left alone if that was what he wanted. He couldn't help but feel that now he was the dead center of attention with a target on his back but he'd made his decision to stand with Kelvin and was determined to be there no mater what happened. And then there was Kelvin. What could he possibly do to help him through what he was about to go through. He had no idea if Kel was really gay or not, he hadn't seen him in two years damn it. How could he even bring it up without pushing his only friend here away. And if Kel was, how could he help when he wasn't being totally honest to himself and to those who mattered most in his life. He was scared to death. It was one thing to be gay in the relative anonymity of a city as big as Houston, he didn't fool himself into thinking he was experienced, but had often taken advantage of the freedom his car gave him. But this small west Texas town he was in now? He swore everybody would know everything about him the minute he said anything about himself. What would his father do or say? His mom was a guest of the state for the next five years, how could she have been so stupid. His dad was all he had left! The more he thought about the days events the more he felt like he was drowning, his thoughts overwhelming him. He was going to have to tell someone! When he decided to stand by Kel, the decision to tell or not, he felt, was taken out of his hands. He didn't have to be open with everyone but a select few would have to know. starting with his dad. Now if he could find the right time! The next morning, Chris stepped out of the shower in his dad's small two bedroom house. After a sleepless night he had come up with a plan. As he finished drying his lean frame he stroked his fingers across his chin. No need to shave yet he thought (Not that time of the month his dad would often joke.). He knew what he would say, how he would say it and the reaction he would get. There was no need to rush. It had to work! "Now where did I put that stupid Medicalert." "Morning Chris." his dad said when he walked into the kitchen "Here, Kelvin made the front page." Charles pointed indicating the small local paper on the breakfast table. Chris's heart skipped a beat as he examined the header at the top of the article "Hate Crime In Local School" Chris read on "Local police have reported that 16 year old Kelvin Stuart the son of Mr. and Mrs. James Stuart was attacked yesterday at Lee Consolidated High School after students were told he was gay...." "Dad how could they...?" Chris looked away from the paper at his father. "It wasn't like that, it was just a rumor." "Yeah, well, I think you should really think about how much you want to be around that kid." Charles said. "That kid? DAD? its Kel your talking about, not `That Kid'." Chris couldn't believe his father was being this way. All his plans were crumbling around him. (He briefly remembered something he read in one of his favorite books, "The problem with scripting your life is that everybody else keeps forgetting their lines.") "I promised Kel I would be there and I will!" "Look, I just don't want you to get hurt. It's hard enough in a new school and all." Charles continued, "I know he's your friend and all. I just want to be sure you know what your getting into. I don't want people to think you're `that way' too." "Dad I am `that way'!" The blood drained out of Chris's face the ax had fallen. God it wasn't supposed to be like this but he'd said it and couldn't take it back now. It was too late. Chris just looked at his dad willing some kind of response and dreading it at the same time. Chris's dad just stared at him, eyes wide, mouth open as if what he was about to say had stopped half in and half out of his throat. "Dad, I love you. I'm sorry...." Chris began. "You'll be late for school." Chris's dad finally said in a quiet hollow voice that scared Chris more than his dad's yelling would have. "Dad please I...." Chris tried again, he wanted to talk. To try to explain. "Just go. You'll be late...." Charles said again, dimly aware of his son as he grabbed his car keys. Chris turned back at the door, "Dad, I love you." then turned and left for school. It was the only thing his numbed mind could think to do. Kelvin awoke to the sound of his dad's whispered voice across his room. "How could you print that George?" Mr. Stuart said as quietly as he could into his cell phone. "No, no, look, didn't you even think what this could do to him? Its like you've raped him. Hell George we haven't even had a chance to talk to...." Mrs. Stuart cleared her throat. "James!" "Morning son, how you feel today?" "Better mom." Kelvin said. "Dad what's going on? Who are you talking to?" Mr.Stuart shut off his phone and turned to his son. "Nothing bud. let your mom and I worry about it." No that wouldn't do. His son was a pilot in his own right even though they had agreed he would wait for his eighteenth birthday to get his license. He had shown he could handle problems! James thought with pride. His son deserved the opportunity to get a grasp of these events that seemed to be spinning out of control. They were in this together he reminded himself again. "Son that's not exactly true, what I just said." " I think we all need to talk." He said as he handed the paper to Kelvin. Chris returned to the hospital that afternoon. School had been a blur. he couldn't concentrate. Hell, after that morning he would probably never be able to go back anyway after his dad threw him out. That few of the other students would even talk to him and those who did seemed universally hostile, he barely even noticed. His primary concern at the moment, however, was how to tell Kel that he might be going away (He had no idea where.), that he wouldn't be there after all. Kelvin was alone in his room. His parents had gone home to collect some of his personal items and clothes he would need for the next few days he was there. The doctor had told them, as Kel blushed and tried to hide his eyes from his mom, that they were probably going to remove his catheter that day. It had already been a long day. He and his parent had the long talk he had been dreading and had come to some kind of understanding. In fact they seemed to take his admissions better than he was. Then Chris came in. Silence hung in the air as the two sixteen year olds looked in each others eyes, each terrified of the news they were bearing, not knowing how to begin. News they were sure would hurt the other and possibly end their friendship. "Chris?" Kelvin began finally breaking the uncomfortable silence that pervaded the room. "I guess you saw this mornings paper?" "Yeah, it sucked." Chris replied cautiously. "Well I need to tell you something about what they said...." Kelvin said quietly, still not wanting to go through with this. "What they said about..., wha-what they said, I mean, It's true." Kel looked at his friend expecting him to bolt for the door as soon he finished. He was relieved to see Chris still there. "How?" Chris began "Do your parents know?" Kelvin nodded his head. "Yeah, we had a long talk about it. I think they'll be OK with it. At least they won't throw me out." A slight smile crossed Kel's face. "I need to know if we can still be friends?" Chris looked at Kel. "We'll always be friends, I just, I don't know, I just wish I could say the same about my dad throwing me out." "Why would he....?" Kelvin started. Chris? get thrown out of his house? Why would Chris's dad throw him out? His eyes went wide "Your...?" "Yeah I am. I told my dad this morning. I don't think it went too well." Chris said. Kelvin reached out to his friend and absently traced the pattern of veins visible on Chris's forearms, imagining he could see the sparks he was feeling, breathing hard even though the effort was painfull "What will you do? Where will you go?" Chris could only shrug his shoulders "I don't know." "Hey guys!" Mr. Stuart said as he walked through the door where he had been listening to the exchange between Christopher and his son. He felt he needed to try to lighten up the mood in the room. He'd known Charles Bauchamp for years and couldn't imagine him abandoning his son. "Here are your things." he deposited a bag at the foot of Kelvin's bed, laughing silently to himself at the two red faced boys in the room acting like they had been talking about the weather. He knew he shouldn't have been listening but ambush was a technique he used on all his sons in order to keep up with them. "Just thought you'd like to know, Jimmy (James Jr.) and Brian will be here tomorrow. They're driving up from College Station tonight." Both of Kelvin's brothers attended Texas A&M. They were "Aggies", in the corps of cadets and as such were the subject of many good natured jokes around the state. "Your certain they won't get lost?" Kelvin asked trying to smile at his dad, laughter would hurt his ribs too much. Chris forced a laugh. "Watch it boy, I resemble that remark!" Kel's dad was also an Aggie. These things kind of ran in the family. "Kel?" "I don't know if you wanted us to but we told them." "And?" kelvin asked suddenly on edge. "Well, the last I saw, your mom was trying to convince Jim to stop planning the cavelry charge he wants to lead against those boys that attacked his littlest brother." Mr. Stuart added with what he hoped was the right amount of drama to get his point across. James's banter with the boys was too soon interrupted by a nurse, (How did they always know the worst time to come in?) sent to chart Kel's condition and remove the foley. "Bet you'll be glad to get rid of that thing!" said Mr.Stuart watching his son turn an even deeper shade of red if that were possible and Chris go white. He smiled, it looked like some kind of ESP blood transfusion. "Common Chris lets leave these two alone, lets go for a walk." It was time to get back onto more serious subjects. Feeling somewhat reassured by his talk with Kel's dad, Chris returned to his home. He still expected to find his bags packed on the porch but was better prepared to face that possibility. Hell, James had even offered to recommend him for a part-time job at the airport on the line crew. Something was finally going right. The house was dark when he arrived. Turning on the lights when he entered he saw a note on the wall by the switch. "Out late. Dinners in the oven." was all it said. Chris released the breath he had been holding. Again reassured by the normal tone of the note, Chris ate the dinner his dad had prepared and after cleaning the kitchen he finished his preparations for bed. As he lay on top of the bed nude as he always slept these days, listening to the crickets and other sounds of the night, hands clasped behind his head, he felt strangely satisfied. His life wasn't so secret anymore. So what that nothing had gone the way he thought it would, it was done. Even though the problems would be different, somehow he just didn't see Kelvin drunk in a strange hotel room jerking off for some older guy's video camera like he had done once in a very stupid moment. (one of his teammates, during a "crazy thing I've done" conversation, had pulled him asside and told him about the Dean Coryll murders in `73.) He would still be able to help him. Hell, if nothing else he could teach him to swim better, thinking of the last time, years ago, they had gone to Lake Whitney with Kel's family. Chris smiled to himself. Kel swam about as well as a rock. Secure in his thoughts, he finally drifted off to sleep. "CHRISTOPHER GET OUT HERE NOW!" Chris didn't know if it was his father's voice or the sound of breaking glass that woke him up. he rolled out of bed and grabbed a towel, quickly wrapping it tightly around his narrow waist. "Dad! What's wrong?" Chris asked as he made his way to the living room, trying to watch where he stepped. he was instantly assaulted by a strong smell of alcohol and alarm bells began to go off. His dad had stopped drinking soon after he divorced his mom. He could be a mean drunk. "WRONG? WROOONG? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S WRONG! YOU'RE WRONG!" Charles yelled, his words barely understandable. "WELL, YOU FUCK, WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY!" Charles punctuated each syllable with a poke in the center of Chris's chest. His son's medicalert necklace flashing him in face each time he did it, enraging him even more "DAD! Stop! STOP IT!" Chris yelled back hoping to get through the alcohol that was speaking and looking frantically for some hope, some place to hide. "MAKE ME YOU SHIT!" Charles screamed back, jutting his chin out at his six foot three, hundred seventy pound son, as if daring him to take a swing at him. `MAKE ME!" Chris reached out towards his dad to hold him off. "DAD! PLEASE!" Chris felt like he was ten years old again. No way could he hit his father! "AHH, FUCK YOU!" Charles shoved his son through the screen door! Chris quickly scrambled to his feet and ran, one of his old swimming trophies barely missing his head. Bare hard muscles straining for all they were worth, his feet slapping the pavement, he ran! Panic had taken over his mind, His dad had never hit him before! (His mom had always been the target of his dad's wrath, but had said nothing) So he ran, a scared scrawny ten year old again, until he couldn't hear his father's bellowing voice. Then he ran some more. The old woman was alarmed. What was all that yelling? She peeked out her window and saw a naked man (or was it that nice boy who had moved in next door?) running as fast as he could, his pale frame clearly illuminated in the full moonlight, away from the house next door! She turned on a light, hands shaking. Now where was that phone? Chris lay shivering in the ditch beside the road where he had fallen. The sparse noise of the traffic on the interstate barely audible in the distance through the cool desert air. He was beginning to feel light headed. Was it from his blood sugar or the situation he found himself in? He didn't know or care! He was sick. His stomach was so tight, squeezing his insides out unmercifully. The bile was rising in his throat. Surrendering to his dry heaves, he felt he was going to throw up again. He curled himself into a ball trying to ease the pain he was feeling. "GOD! OH GOD WHY!" He screamed soundlessly into the night completely unaware of the headlights and flashing red, blue lights of the slowly approaching police cruiser over his naked shoulder. There's part two of my attempts at telling this story. I thank everybody for their advice (especially medical. I almost wrote myself into a corner I couldn't get the characters out of.) and comments. I hope this chapter is as good as the first one. (Though it may jump back and forth too much) I am trying to get better at this. Thank You.