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Words from Jay were so unexpected that when I heard him speak, I was startled, and jumped. There went any cover I thought I had.
"Yeah, I'm awake."
"Thought so. I need to talk to you about something. I know it's late, but I just couldn't get this out of my mind."
"Sure thing, man. You know I'll always listen to ya."
"Josh, how do you know when you're in love?"
"I just got woke up in the middle of the night, and you're asking me a question like that?"
"C'mon man, just help me out here."
"Okay, but I don't know what makes you so sure that I'm such an expert on the matter. I've only been in love once, or at least I think it was love, anyway."
"At least you know what to think. I'm so confused about the whole thing, I don't know which end is up."
"Lemme give you my best description of what I think it feels like to be in love... maybe it's the right description, maybe it's not. Who knows. Anyway, I think love is when you're so excited that you're almost giddy when you're around somebody. When you see their face, it takes your breath away. Your heart starts racing even at the thought of being near that special someone. And when you're together, you don't think there is any other place in the world you'd rather be than right there. When that person fills you up completely. That's what I think love is."
"Wow...." Jay was almost breathless.
"So, is that what you're feeling?"
"Totally..."
"So, who's the lucky gal?"
"Well..."
"You know you can tell me."
"I dunno..."
"Dude, you're killing me here! I gotta know!"
"Wait, wait, wait. Didn't you tell me earlier that you'd say who you were trying to impress when we went to the mall?"
"That's beside the point. C'mon man! You're the one who woke me up in the middle of the night, ya know." Jay was unnaturally quiet for a minute or more, and I knew something was bothering him. "What's wrong, Jay. I can tell something's bothering you, now what is it?" I heard Jay sobbing quietly. "Oh, man..." I leaned up on my side and reached over to touch Jay's shoulder, but he jerked away quickly.
"Just don't okay!" He shouted at me, sobbing harder.
"Please, Jay, you have to tell me what's wrong with you... you're scaring me," I said, with an unsteady voice of my own.
"We've been friends for so long Josh... so long..." Jay's voice was almost grief-stricken, and it was breaking my heart to see him this way.
"I know, Jay. That's why you can tell me what's wrong. Look, I'm really sorry if I said something to upset you just now. I didn't mean to, I swear." My voice was so tight with emotion. The air was charged with unspoken words.
"I want to tell you Josh, I do. But I don't know if I can." I could see the tears staining his cheeks. I wanted so badly to kiss them all away.
"You can tell me anything. I promise you, there's nothing you could say that would change the way I feel about you... err... our friendship." I had to fight hard to keep my composure.
Jay sat up, and so did I. He turned to me quickly, and hugged me. He embraced me tightly, as if holding on for his life, and in a barely audible voice, he whispered in my ear, "Josh--I--I--"
"Calm down, Jay. Calm down, and go slow. It'll be okay, we're friends, remember. You said so today."
Wracking sobs took over his body. "I think--I'm in love with you."
We were both sobbing now. Tears were dampening our naked shoulders.
"I'm so scared, Josh. You don't hate me do you?" There was such a pleading quality in his voice. He was more than scared. He was terrified. Of me. The weight of the situation almost crushed me.
"Oh, God no, Jay! I could never hate you! I... love you too." Whew. There. I said it. So how come I didn't feel any better?
"Y--you do?" His bottom lip was trembling... how CUTE!
"Ye..." Before I could get the words out of my mouth, Jay squeezed me so hard, I couldn't breathe.
"You're not just messing with me are you? Do you really mean it?"
"I really mean it, Jay. But there's more."
"M-more?" Now it was excitement in his voice, not fear.
"Yeah. I think I've loved you since the day I met you." Ahhh... NOW I feel better.
We were still holding on to each other. Our crying had stopped, and I could feel Jay's heart beating rapidly--almost as rapidly as my own.
I released my hold on Jay just enough to be able to look into those beautiful deep blue pools he calls eyes. My heart took over, and I had no control. I felt myself moving closer to Jay, and I instinctively closed my eyes. My head tilted slightly, and in a few moments, our lips met for the very first time. It was my first kiss, and I almost fainted from the feelings it gave me. It was a sweet, tender kiss; our mouths remained closed. We held our position for an eternity, but it still wasn't long enough. When we broke our kiss, we were both gasping for air... "Maybe I should breathe next time," I made a mental note.
I couldn't help myself. I collapsed on the bed beside Jay in a fit of giggles. Soon, he followed suit.
"What are we laughing about?" Jay questioned between giggles.
"I don't know!"
That only served to make us laugh even harder. Laughing as hard and as loud as we were, I'm surprised we didn't wake the whole neighborhood! Luckily, Jay's mom and dad wouldn't be home until Sunday afternoon, or else we would've had two tired, angry parents to deal with, I'm sure.
Once our laughter subsided, Jay and I took a long, serious look at one another. We both had huge smiles plastered across our faces. I thought for sure we would both crack up again, but we didn't. We moved in for another warm hug, instead.
"I've dreamed of this moment for my whole life." Jay said.
"Yeah, me too. I never thought it would ever happen, though. I thought the only way I could kiss you and hold you was in my dreams."
Jay took the initiative, then, to kiss me. He pressed his lips gently to mine, and we kissed sweetly again at first. But as we both became more comfortable with the feeling, our kissing became more urgent. All the years of pent-up passion between us fought for release in that one single kiss. I was surprised to feel Jay's tongue caressing my lips, and it took me a moment to realize what he wanted. When I finally did figure it out, I eagerly parted my lips, and our tongues timidly met between us. Half-naked as we were, it was not difficult to feel each other's excitement.
Jay pushed me back down on the bed, and lay on top of me. He started slowly grinding into me, and I couldn't stop a moan from escaping my throat. That seemed to encourage Jay, as he started grinding into me harder and faster. I could feel myself getting close, and I tried to break our kiss to warn Jay, but he would have none of that. And soon, he himself started to lose rhythm, and his movements became more frantic.
I finally broke our kiss and said to Jay, almost yelling, "Jay, stop. I don't want it to end so soon!"
I know it was very difficult for him, because I could tell how close he was, but he did stop.
"Oh, wow, Josh! I've never felt anything so right in my life!" Jay was breathless.
"Jay, I was awake last night."
It took a minute for Jay to process what I was saying, but as soon as he caught my meaning, his face turned beet-red.
"Look, Josh, I--"
"No, wait. Don't say anything. It's okay. I liked it. A LOT. And, since you made me feel so wonderful last night, I want to return the favor. It's only fair."
Without another word, I slid out from under him, and moved down between his legs. I then slowly removed the only thing between me and paradise. I knew Jay was still sensitive from coming so close and having to stop so suddenly. I took extra care when the fabric was sliding over some particular areas. But Jay trembled and moaned anyway. He must have been on the very edge... good.
I took a moment to stare at the wondrous object before my eyes. The very symbol of masculinity; the center of unimaginable pleasure. How could it look so soft and supple, yet be as hard as granite? My face was mere inches from his hardness, and I could smell his musk. It was such an erotic smell. I couldn't get enough.
Ah, but the gears in my head were turning. I took him into my hand, and started stroking him, slowly at first, speeding up when he writhed and moaned loud enough to rattle the windows. He was leaking like a fountain.
"Josh, I'm getting close again...," Jay moaned to me.
"Oh, you're close are ya? Real close?"
"Ohhhhh yeah," he whimpered.
"In that case..." I stooped stroking, grinning wickedly.
"No, Josh, please don't stop. That feels so good. Don't stop..."
I just looked at Jay, still grinning. He was writhing on the bed, and breathing raggedly. I hated to do this, but I felt it was time for revenge.
"J-josh, what are you doing?! I'm gonna explode! Help me please!"
"Heheheh. Serves you right, boy. You shouldn't have left me that way last night!" I laughed heartily. "You see what it feels like?"
Jay could only whimper pitifully.
"You had enough yet? You learned your lesson?" I could barely hold in the belly laugh that was fighting to escape my mouth, but somehow I did. Seeing the look of utter helplessness on Jay's face was absolutely hilarious (given the situation, of course)!
"Uh-huh. Please..."
"Oh, okay. I can't bear to see at that forlorn look on your face anymore, anyway. Heheheh." So, I continued pleasuring him, quickening my pace to relieve his misery as fast as possible.
This time, Jay gave me no warning. I guess he was afraid I'd torture him again. The idea was tempting, but I'm not quite that evil. He grunted, and shot his seed powerfully. Most of it landed on my hand and his belly, but some of it landed on my face and in my hair.
"Oh, look, Jay. You're a mess! I guess I'll just have to clean you up!" I proceeded to lick my fingers seductively. His didn't taste as salty as mine. It tasted like honey to me.
Jay still hadn't come out of orbit yet; he was watching me with a look of wide-eyed wonder on his face. "Whoa..." was all he could manage to say.
"Jay," I whispered, as I settled my body on top of his, "I love you."
"Oh God, Josh. It feels so good to hear you say that--even better than what you did for me just now hehehe. I love you too." I kissed him tenderly. "Joshy, I want to make you feel the way you made me feel; I want to do for you what you did for me."
"Not tonight. I just want you to hold me in your arms all night."
"Not a problem."
I rolled over to lay beside Jay. He turned to lay on his stomach and face me, and draped his arm over my stomach. We kissed one more time, said our good-night's, and fell asleep, wrapped in the warmth that only true love can bring.
We woke the next morning to the sound of a knock on Jay's bedroom door.
"Honey, wake up. We're home." It was Jay's mom. One look at Jay's alarm clock told me that it was only 9 A.M., so that meant that his parents were early. Very early.
"Okay mom, we'll be right down." Jay said, in his raspy, sexy early-morning voice. There isn't much sexier than Jay's voice in the morning. It's indescribable.
"We?" Jay's mom questioned.
"Yeah, mom. Josh spent the night last night."
"All right. Well, you boys hurry up and come downstairs, breakfast will be ready in a few minutes." With that, she went back downstairs to help with breakfast.
Jay was still laying the way we had fallen asleep, so he lifted his arm from my stomach so I could raise up and stretch.
"Mmmmm... G'mornin' sunshine." I yawned.
"Good morning..." He smiled at me. "Hehehehe, you still have some 'evidence' in your hair baby. We'd better get that washed out!"
"Not only that, but we gotta get you some clothes buddy!"
Jay looked down, and blushed slightly as he realized that he had fallen asleep naked. "I'll race ya to the shower!" He jumped up and streaked across the room.
"Cheater! You had a head start, that's no fair!"
"Hey, you're not the one who's naked! Besides, who said anything about fair!" Jay laughed. He made it to the bathroom before I was even out of bed.
When I did finally manage to disentangle myself from the covers and get out of bed, I walked to the bathroom door, which Jay had shut but not locked. I knocked on the door, and said, "I want a rematch."
"Nope. You lost, and you know it. You're just a sore loser."
"Well, don't I at least get a consolation prize?"
"Sure. Come on in, and you can collect your 'consolation prize'." I could hear the smile in his voice. I also heard him turn on the shower.
I was slightly nervous at his request, but I slowly opened the door anyway. Jay was waiting on the other side.
"Slow poke."
"You don't know that yet."
Jay blushed slightly, but quickly recovered. He took my hand, kissed my palm, and placed it over his heart.
"You feel that, Josh? That's all for you. The only reason my heart beats is you." He kissed me sweetly on the cheek, and started pulling down my boxers.
"Now," he said, "we match." He led me to the running shower, and we stepped in together.
Jay stood behind me, with his hands lovingly placed around my waist. His chin was resting on my shoulder, and he sighed contentedly in my ear.
"Can't we stay like this forever?" He asked.
"Oh, believe me. I have no problem with that. But I think your mom might start to worry after a couple of years like this. Besides, if we stayed in the water that long, to say we looked like prunes would probably be an understatement."
"You're a goofball!"
"You say that like it's a bad thing."
Jay giggled at my remark.
"So, where's my consolation prize, big boy?"
"Big boy, eh? Hehe, thanks." He reached up above my head to a rack which held the soap and shampoo. He grabbed the shampoo.
"You're avoiding my question."
"No I'm not, I just had to get your prize."
"You're giving me a bottle of shampoo. Thanks a bunch."
"Nope. You'll just have to wait and see." He squeezed some of the shampoo into the palm of his hand, and began to massage it into my hair.
"Mmmm... that feels great..."
"Josh?"
"Yeah..."
"I, um. Well, I. I love you."
"I love you too, Jay."
He continued to work his magic on my scalp. I never thought that having my hair washed for me could be such an erotic experience. Every nerve in my body was alive, and on fire. It was as if, by touching me in one place, he could touch my whole body.
"Time to rinse. I think we got all of my... 'mess' out of your hair." After he was done with my hair, we soaped and washed each other's body, paying special attention to certain areas, of course. It wasn't really a sexual thing at all. It was more of a way for us to tell each other that we'd always be there to take care of one another. I had never felt closer to another human being in my entire life than I did to Jay as we cleansed each other's body, and soul. No other words were spoken until we were out of the shower. As Jay was toweling me off, I said, "You know, you're mom's probably wondering where we are about now." "You're right. We've probably been in here for half an hour or more. Look at your hands."
We both laughed as I lifted my hands, and looked in mock horror at the wrinkles on my fingers.
Once we were both dry, we returned to Jay's bedroom, quickly dressed ourselves, and went downstairs for breakfast.
"Hi boys. I'm glad you finally decided to join us," Jay's mom said, as we entered the kitchen.
"We were just about ready to send out a search party," Jay's dad chimed in.
Jay and I sat down next to each other at the table, and Jay's mom started piling sausage, eggs, biscuits and gravy onto our plates. We both ate hungrily, and managed to contribute lightly to the conversation about the trip the Pettit's had just returned from. It was very interesting conversation. Nothing seemed different between all of us. I had been to the Pettits' house so often, and stayed so much that I was like one of the family anyway. The only indication that anything had changed was the fact that Jay and I were holding hands under the table, and would brush our knees together far too often to be accidental. Of course, Jay's parents noticed none of this. It would be our little secret. For now.
Finally, it was time for me to go home. The idea of home almost seemed strange to me now. I had been gone only two days, yet it felt as though a lifetime had come and gone. I had learned and experienced so much, it was hard to imagine that it all took place in only one weekend, and that weekend wasn't even over yet.
When we arrived at my house, I was reluctant to leave Jay's car.
"I won't get to be with you again until tomorrow. I can't wait a whole night to see you again, Jay. I'll go crazy!"
"We'll make it. It's taken six years for us to get this far. One more night might be hard to handle, but it's not impossible. For what it's worth, I don't know what I'm gonna do tonight without you. Just that one night you spent in my arms was enough to spoil me for a lifetime."
With that, and a long, passionate kiss, I left Jay's car, and waved to him as he drove down the street.
I walked into my house with a grin on my face so huge, I'm sure it cut my whole face in half. I felt as if I were floating. As I passed the living room, I saw my mother sitting on the couch, watching television.
"Hey honey. Did you have a good time?"
"I sure did, mom."
"From the look on your face, I'd say you had a great time."
"You could say that, yeah."
I floated through the house and put my dirty clothes into the hamper. I eventually made my way back to my mother, hugged her, kissed her on the cheek, and sat down beside her to watch television. We had lunch and dinner together, making small talk, laughing and generally having fun like two good friends throughout the rest of the day. Something had changed in my mother, and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. All I know is that it made her happy, and anything that made her happy made me happy, too.
After spending some quality time with Mom, I went up to my room. I listened to music on the radio, sang along, and danced until it was time for me to go to bed.
It was hard for me to sleep that night. My mind kept floating back to Jay. I kept reliving the most wonderful few hours of my life. I couldn't imagine anything getting any better.
I finally fell asleep wondering if Jay was having as much trouble as I was having. I'm sure he was.
This chapter is dedicated to a good friend of mine, Mark. Man, I hope you have as much luck with your dream guy as Josh has had. You deserve to have all the happiness in the world.
Lemme know what you thought at schoolfield@juno.com. Your response to the last chapter was beyond belief! I never expected to get much of a response at all, but boy did you guys prove me wrong! Thank you so much, and I'll always be grateful to all of you. Now that that's out of the way, got any suggestions for the next chapter?