Date: Sat, 21 Dec 2002 02:04:41 -0500
From: DA
Subject: My Savior 1

Ever since I can remember I was always that kid that always got picked on.
The one who was the blunt of everyone's joke and the one who always ended
up coming home with bruises and bloody shirts. That's just the way my life
was and by the time I was sixteen I had basically accepted it.  Though
someone could have done something long ago when all of this started, they
did absolutely nothing. Why you ask, cause they couldn't give a damn
either. Most of the time my dad sweet talked them into believing the
reasons for the many bruises and split lips that I had acquired over the
years.  And this is basically the reason why when I go to bed at night I
always dream that someone would come and rescue me, I would hope and pray
and that of someone, anyone for that matter could just come and take me
away from all of the pain that I had experienced over the years and protect
me from the bullies and most of all of my dad. (my mom had died giving
birth, and that was fact he never let me forget. He blamed me for
everything.) I guess this is where my story begins...

	As that dreaded sound of the alarm clock buzzed, I slowly dragged
myself out of bed to prepare for another day in the hell known as
school. The first day of the eleventh grade in fact.( I had gotten skipped
and that didn't help my situation any either; always being the youngest kid
in class.)  Since kindergarten I have hated going to that prison, and
everyday since kindergarten I wished that I just didn't have to go. If I
had any friends the situation and my opinion may have been different but by
the age of sixteen I was set in the belief that I was a loner for life. A
lonely individual that could never meet up to the standards of society and
those expected of me by my peers. I wasn't so much worried about the way
that my fellow peers reacted and treated me but it was societies perception
of me that caused me to feel depressed all the time. I mean my peers and my
town I could get away from eventually but the way society perceived me
would be something that would carry around with me for life. If you haven't
figured it I'm gay, and the thought that i could be rejected for the rest
of my life just devastated me.

	Standing by the bed reflecting over all the things that bothered me
I took the opportunity to glance at myself in the mirror. Basically what
was reflecting back was the image that my dad had implanted in my psyche
long before I was even aware of my self-image: A worthless piece of shit!;
according to my dad. Sigh! I mean there was absolutely nothing special
about me. I had long blond hair that reached down to my shoulders, very
dull and plain green eyes, and a lithe form that weighed about 105-110lbs
dripping wet, and to top it all off I was a fucking midget. Not literally I
mean, but almost; at sixteen I stood at only 5'3. When I was twelve I had
gotten very sick and was even hospitalized and as a result it stunted my
growth spurt. I was doomed to be 5'3 forever. That fact alone contributed
to a lot of my teasing, but what really did me in was how delicate looking
my body was. Many people had often mistaken me for a girl, and that had not
gone unanswered by my dad when he found out. He basically beat the shit of
me and told me no son of his was gonna be a "fudge- packing sissy." Yeah,
that's my dad. As I was standing there I was suddenly snapped out of my
daydreaming but the ear-splitting screaming that I had become oh so
familiar with over the years:

"Brian get your fucking ass out of that bed before i beat the shit out of
you."

"I'm up sir," I quickly yelled before he could come upstairs, sighing I
just took my towel and entered the sole bathroom in the house.  Trying to
wash as fast as possible so that the beast downstairs wouldn't come
upstairs and blame me for running up his water bill, I avoided my throbbing
five and half inches at all cost. This was neither the time nor the place.
I just hoped that today would be different and that this school year
wouldn't be full of all the taunting and abuse and maybe this year I could
make a least one friend. That was something I've been longing for my entire
life.
	Turning off the water, I ran across the hall back into my room and
threw on my clothes; a pair of worn black jeans, a wrinkled and partially
dirty white tee shirt and my run down Nike sneakers.  Hey, when you barely
have any money you have to make due, and that making due basically added
more to my being teased and taunted without an end. If always seem that if
they couldn't tease me about something it was always something else. Okay,
I've got to snap out of it or I'll never get to school on time, and that's
the last thing i need is to be late to class and have the entire class
staring back at me, no way! I definitely need to be leaving within the next
minute. Oh well, I guess there's no time for breakfast; not like we have
food in the house anyway, I hadn't gotten the chance to go shopping
yesterday because good all dad had drunk away all of the grocery money. So
it looked like pickings would be sparse for the next two weeks. I couldn't
care less though, by now my stomach is so use to not getting regular meals
frequently that its even stopped growling. Damn, I better hurry up, we
don't need any problems on the first day.

	Heading out of the door, I quickly turned the bolt and proceeded to
walk down the street of our rundown neighborhood. Sometimes it even
surprises me that our house is still standing because of the condition it's
in. I swear a rat would probably even refuse to leave there, well just look
at the bright side I've only got one more year of H.S. and I'll be out of
this hell-hole forever and trust me I definitely wont ever be looking
back. The weather on the other hand reflected my mood perfectly.  It was
overcast with very dark clouds and it looked like it was probably going to
pour down with rain. Better hurry up. Unfortunately, just as i was turning
the corner on the final block of my two mile journey, the downpour started;
succeeding in drenching me down to the bone and causing my already long
hair to stick to me and make me look even more like the white trash that I
already was.  What a perfect way to start the new school year! I wonder if
this is an omen of the year to come?

Chapter 2 -- The Arrival

	Running that last block of school had to definitely be one of the
worst moments of my life.  I mean not only was I going to be late and I was
afraid of what the teacher would say or do; but I had to begin my first day
of the eleventh grade soak and wet. Well, its not like its ;anything new in
the supremely fucked up life of Brian but I would just have to suck it up
and move on with my life: That's what I've always done in the past and this
time would prove to be no different.

	Still running at a feverish pace into the school yard I was
suddenly and quickly thrown back onto my feet by the adonis of the school.
Jake Thompson. Just the mere utterance of his name can give me an instant
hard-on and the thought that I had actually come into contact with him
(regardless of the way it happened) was enough to fill my jack-off
fantasies for months. Ever since the third grade I've been lusting over
this guy and admiring him from afar and out of all the time I had never
even said so much as hello. Hey, I'm a really shy person so it's hard for
me to just go up to people and initiate a conversation. However, while
thinking about the years that I had secretly lusted after Jake and grown to
love him, I was quickly snapped back to reality by the figure of an angel
standing above me and asking me if I was alright.

	"Hey dude, are you okay? I mean I really sorry about what happened
back there but I just really didn't see you running. I guess I'm in kind of
a daze because it's the first day of school; you know how that usually is."

	Quickly nodding to him to tell him that I understood, I couldn't
help but to be captivated by his beauty once again. As the captain of the
swim team, Jake definitely has a very developed body.  A body that could
put the David to shame and a cock that I heard could put the God's to
shame. But off course I hadn't confirmed the rumor yet; and a pair of azure
blue that could just make me melt anytime he looked in my direction.
Standing at 5'10 and weighing in at 160lbs, Jake was everything I could
ever want in a man: confident, sexy, and strong. Unfortunately, i knew we
were never destined to be lovers, like alone friends. So i just continued
my journey onward to meet the warden or should i say home room teacher:
Mr. Small.

	Just as I had expected, i was already late and just as i turned the
corner to walk into the building the late bell rang. Damn!! Here we go
again, what a wonderful way to start the eleventh grade. Anyway, pushing
onwards I knew that it was now that i had to be strong and to stand at
least put on a good front for the first day. For it could possibly be this
day that i could make one friend at least and have a decent school year,
but like always i highly doubted that. Alright here we go the big moment,
as i turned the knob my heart damn near stopped; what was waiting on the
other side of that door.

	As I stepped into the classroom, Mr. Small stopped talking
immediately. I mean not only was I at least five minutes late but I looked
horrible to match. The rain hadn't help my clothes or my general attire at
all that morning.

	"So Mr. Walsh, I see you decided to grace us with your presence
after all. And by the looks of you I can tell that you didn't spend all
your time this morning sitting in front of a mirror. Take a seat in the
back please next to Brandon."

	Great! That's exactly what i need, to be embarrassed on the first
fucking day. And to top it all off I had to sit next to Brandon. That boy
definitely came second in the beating my ass dept next to my dad. What a
year this was going to be. As i started walking to the back of the class,
with all eyes on me, I couldn't help but blush three million shades of
red. I mean, as i told you im a naturally shy person so all this attention
wasn't helping the situation. Just when i thought things could get back to
normal, off course they didn't. Right when everyone had turned around to
get there programs from Mr. Small and just talk with some old friends,
Brandon stuck his foot out in the aisle and tripped me.  I mean I swear, I
could see the whole thing happening in slow motion, and that's what made it
even more horrible. As I tripped over Brandon's foot and landed hard on my
arm, the whole class erupted in screams of laughter. Off course always
being the victim, Mr. Small turned right on me and yelled at me for making
a ruckus in class, not even reprimanding Brandon in his obvious role in
this development.  Add one more strike to the just not my day category.

	After getting my program and groaning over the courses that would
be awaiting me this semester, i headed to my first period class-
Calculus. Oh, didn't I tell you guys before, im sort of a nerd too, but i
guess you figured that out from the fact that I got skipped. Anyway, as i
headed down the hall to the other side of the school building, I gracefully
put my head down to avoid being seen by anyone and prevent giving anyone a
reason to try and beat me up again. I had become sort of the school
punching bag over the years and I wasn't about to give anyone a reason to
start in on me again this school yr. Well, here I am at the door. Hopefully
this wouldn't be as bad as home room.

	Walking into the room, there was the biggest shock of my life.
There was Jake! Maybe this year was going to be looking up after all.


Part 3 -- First Day Summation

	I mean to say that it was a surprise walking into my class to see
Jake sitting there would have been an understatement. I mean Wow!, I would
have never expected him to be taking Calculus, let alone be sitting there
smiling back at me. It was like a dream come true, i mean i felt like i was
stuck on stupid and the thought that thee Jake Thompson could be smiling my
way was too good to be true.  Unfortunately, i was awoken from this marvel
by a hard push from behind. Turning around to secretly glance at my
attacker, i noticed it was Brandon. Damn, here we go again. Before, i will
continue, however, i think i should give u a description of Brandon, and
why it is he gives me nightmares. I mean where should i begin with the kid,
he was 6'2, 220lbs, and basically built like a brick house. He had ice blue
eyes and if he wasn't so evil i would even go so far to say that he could
have been cute. But he had been the wrestling and footballs teams, ever
since we were freshman and it definitely showed. The boy was massive. Since
8th he's kind of taken it upon himself to be my tormentor along with some
of his other friends. Anyway, back to the story at hand.

	As soon, as Brandon pushed me the smile on Jake's face disappeared.
I'd even go so far to say that he had a murderous look on his face after
that, but I'd just be kidding myself, not Jake. And definitely not for me!
Look, seeing as how i don't want to bore you with the rest of my day, i
just basically sum it up for ya. Calculus was the only class i shared with
Jason out of the six i had this year, with gym being my last class. That
class, unfortunately was also shared with Brandon. Right after we had gone
through all the rules and procedures about gym, which we all pretty much
knew, we were dismissed and allowed to go home. Yes!! Not that i was really
looking forward to going home but at least it gave an extra forty minutes
to kill time and to just enjoy what was left of my day.

	As i was heading out of the school building turning toward
Washington St., for the second time of the day i received a hard push from
behind.

"Hey fag, where do you think you're going. I saw you eyeing me in gym
today."

	Damn, it was Brandon with three of his friends this time. I knew i
just had to take my beating cause i knew that it was coming. After falling
to the ground from the initial shove, Brandon and his friends began kicking
and punching me like there was no tomorrow. I mean i had pretty much grown
accustom to this from last year, but the fact that i had just received a
bad beating from my dad two days ago just mad it worse. After about five
minutes of this pounding from them, i just knew i was going to die. By that
point i had already coughed up blood and i was just sitting there waiting
for the final blow to the head that i eventually knew was coming. I swear i
think Brandon and my dad should get married, they'd make a perfect couple.
They could just beat the shit out of each other and they'd probably both be
really happy. Oh well, all i could do was simply lie there and take it like
the little piece of shit that i knew i was. However, Just when Brandon's
foot was coming toward my head and i was waiting for that darkness to
envelope me, i heard a voice call out:

"Stop!."

	After that, everything went black! What a Day.