Written By: Jaden
Edited By My Handsome, Charming, Kind Hearted, LiL' Bro, Chris
Disclaimer: This story involves love, relationship, and "adult" subject matter between teenage boys... so I guess that means your not supposed to read this if your under 18, but really if you are younger than that, I can't stop you. Just Don't Get Caught :) If homosexuality offends you, then leave, or join the 21st century, and open up to it.
This Is FICTION... any character resembling a real life person is by coincidence, and in the rare event a character is based on someone in real life their name has been changed due to legal and personal protection. You never know who's lurking around reading this. So now the little spiel is over so hopefully someone will enjoy this. Do Not Reproduce this story, and if you would like to have it on your web site, email me & get my permission. Thanks. This is my first story so try not to crucify me to bad. Copyright Jaden 2002
Songs Used In This Chapter: Lonestar - Amazed
Two weeks have past since the funeral. Since my best friend and first love was put to rest. Everything has been a blur in my life lately. School has been almost unbearable. Between teachers and students always asking me if I'm okay, and offering condolences, it's starting to get to me. Don't they realize by bringing it up all of the time that it's making the pain even worse for me?
One thing that has come out of all of this that could be considered a good thing is I've finally opened up to my own feelings once again. If Joey taught me one thing it was to value the things around you while you still have them. I've let petty differences interfere with my happiness, whether it be my friendship with Kai or my relationship with Tyler. Love can't be silenced by words. Seeing Tyler in that hospital bed, the fear of losing him... it pretty much shocked me back into reality. I'm still in love with him. I guess I never stopped loving him, just tried to make myself believe that I did. It's funny that I have to realize these things when there's another factor in the equation. That being Marcus.
Marcus is a great guy with a heart of gold from what I've seen. He genuinely cares about Tyler, and I think Tyler cares about him too. I want Tyler to be happy and if Marcus can do that for him, then I guess I'll have to deal with that. But as of this moment, I, Blade Stevens, am going after what I want.. after what I need to be happy. I'm not giving up on him without a fight.
I pulled myself out of bed slowly, and drudged off to the shower. Marcus's party is in a few hours, one of those start in the late afternoon end whenever everyone leaves or passes out kind of deals. It's going to be a long day. I showered, dressed quickly and walked back into my room. Suitcases lay all around, half filled with my things. My mother didn't say anything to me about my being gay since I told her, but I knew it was still on her mind. I figure I'll save her and myself the trouble of another fight and just be prepared to leave. There was music blasting through the walls coming from Eric's room.
"Eric, turn that down!" I yelled as I knocked on his door. I started to walk back into my room when the music became even louder. "Eric! Come on!" There was no answer. He's been mad at me since I started packing my things a few days ago. I twisted the door knob and opened the door. Eric was lying on his bed, looking up at the ceiling. I looked up as well and noticed there was a picture where he was staring. I picture of our family.. me, Eric, Mom and Dad. I walked over and sat next to him on the bed.
"We used to be happy, ya know?" He said, more as a statement than a question. "Now not only is dad gone, but you're leaving me too."
"No.. you promised you wouldn't leave me, Blade! You can't break that promise.. you just can't...." His voice cracked as he spoke. He cleared his throat, trying to choke back his on coming tears.
"Eric, I'm not leaving you, okay? I'll find some place near by and you can come stay with me whenever you want to."
"I don't want you to go. Why are you insisting on doing this anyways? Mom didn't tell you to leave, she didn't say anything."
"She did, just not out loud..."
"I never said anything." I turned around startled at my mother's voice.
"Oh really? I think I recall you saying 'Get out of my house, faggot', or something to that effect."
"I was drinking that night..."
"When aren't you drinking? You and your loser for a boyfriend waste your lives away in bars."
"Well, my loser boyfriend is no longer in the equation." That got my attention.
"What do you mean?"
"Gary took a flight back to NY last night." She paused, "And I've realized what I've been doing to you guys by drinking. I'm going to try and stop.. but I can't do this alone."
"So, what are you saying?" I asked.
"I want you to stay. I'm sorry for the way I acted. I need you here, and so does Eric." I looked over at Eric who gave me a pleading look.
"Mom, I'm gay. Can you deal with that?" I decided to be upfront with her.
Her eyes watered up, "Yes... it's just that your life will be so much harder this way..."
"It's my life, Mom. Don't you think I know it will be hard? How hard it already is? It's not like I chose to like guys, but I do and I have to deal with that."
"I know, honey..."
"I'm okay with myself, okay? I can be just as happy with a guy as a straight guy could be with a girl."
"Do you have a boyfriend? That Tyler?"
I looked at her, a little caught of guard by her inquisition, "No.. why do you say that?"
"Just the way he looks at you.. I thought maybe he could be.. ya know.."
"Gay, mother. The word is gay." I said.
"Yes.. gay. So have you had a boyfriend?" I looked at Eric, who looked a little uneasy with our conversation.
"Yes, I've had two. Tyler and uh.. Joey..."
"Joey?" She asked in disbelief.
"C-could we not talk about this please..." I have been trying to keep Joey off of my mind lately. I'm having trouble coping and the mention of his name is enough to bring that lump in my throat back.
"Yes.. I'm sorry.
So, will you stay?" She asked with hope in her voice. I felt a
pair of arms wrap around my waist from behind
and a head on my shoulder.
"Please.." Eric whispered in my ear.
I sighed, "Oh alright." Eric let out a screech right in my ear, "Oww! That's what I get for staying? To be deaf?" He smirked at me. I ruffled his hair before stepping out of his grip. "Geez, what are you gonna do if I go away for college?" Eric gave a a look as if to say 'yeah right'. I looked at my mother who had a smile on her face. Against my own stubbornness, I walked over and hugged her. "Thanks.. for trying." She smiled back at me, with a hint of sadness in her eyes.
"Things are going to be different... we have to be a family again." Eric and I nodded. I looked at the clock and noticed it was getting late.
"Well, I have to stop by Joey's lawyer's office before I go to the party. Eric, are you going to be able to get a ride there or do I need to come back?"
"Um, I haven't heard from Matt today, so I don't know what's going on." I glanced at the clock and tried to figure out how I could do this.
"If he doesn't get a ride then I'll drop him off." My mother stated.
"Okay, thanks. Call my cell if things change." I walked back into my room and grabbed what I was going to change into at the party. I walked down the stairs and grabbed some water, then made my way to the door. As soon as it opened a hand came inches from my face.
"Hey." Tyler stated. He had apparently been about to knock on the door as I was opening it.
"Hey." I smiled at him.
"You're heading out?"
"Yeah, I have to go to the lawyer's office. I don't want to.. but I've been putting it off for the past 2 weeks. I-it's just hard for me, ya know?" I wasn't afraid to show my true feelings in front of Tyler. He knew even though I was putting up the strong front, that in reality I really wasn't doing so well with everything.
"Do you want me to come with? I was just going to see if you wanted to go for a walk or something anyways."
"Are you sure? I don't want you to be bored." I stated.
"Yeah, I want to be there for you." He put a hand on my shoulder. I jumped a little at his touch, but smiled at him.
"Thanks, Ty. Well, we better be going." I walked to my car and Tyler followed. We got in, then headed out. Things were quiet on the way there. I think the awkward moment at the hospital can be thanked for that. If Tyler's mother had waited just 1 more minute, there's no doubt in my mind that we would've kissed.. and maybe we would be back together. I small smile came across my face thinking about it.
"What are you grinning at?" Tyler asked, with a matching grin.
"Hehe, nothing." My moment of happiness came to a halt when we arrived at the lawyer's office. A knot formed in my stomach as I left the car and made my way to the door. I grabbed the door handle then stopped. A surge of sadness and pain swept through me. I closed my eyes and tried to will the feelings away. I felt an arm go around my waist and gently nudge me forward. I glanced back at Tyler, who gave me a small nod. I took a deep breathe and we both entered the building.
We walked into what appeared to be the lobby of the building. Royal blue adorned the room, in carpet, curtains and furniture. It was pretty much deserted, except for the secretary behind a desk.
"I have an appointment with um, Mr. Balk." I said. The older woman behind the desk looked up over her glasses at me. A strange look came across her face. I didn't understand why she was looking at me like that.. that is until I realized Tyler still had his arm around my waist. I blushed deeply, but instead of shrugging his arm off like I normally would do, I decided to ignore her look. I cleared my throat, "An appointment with Mr. Balk, mam. Could you let him know that I'm here?"
She shook herself out of her daze, then pressed a button on the intercom, "Mr. Balk, your client is here." She paused then looked at us again, "Uh, please take a seat, he'll be right with you."
I turned my head slightly to look at Tyler's face. There was a small smile on his face, but he hid it as soon as he noticed I was looking at him. His arm slid from my waist, then we walked over to a sofa and sat down. I mulled over what just happened in my head. I didn't push Tyler away this time.. I really don't care what that lady thinks. Why couldn't I have felt like this back at the beach party? I sighed, disappointed yet again in myself.
"How are you doing?" Tyler asked.
I shrugged, "I don't know. I can't let him go, Tyler. I didn't get to say goodbye to my best friend and I never will. I'm a fuck up and always will be." The bitterness was evident in my voice. Tyler moved closer to me, and pulled me close to him. His arms wrapped around me and he kissed me on the forehead.
"You're not a fuck up, Blade. You're one of the best people I know. None of this is your fault.. it's not anyone's fault, but the people in the other car. Unfortunately Joey ended up the victim. You know he's watching over you, Blade. He loved you."
Love.. that very dangerous four letter word. How many hearts has it broken.. how many tears has it brought? It's a very powerful word and people throw it around so easily. I loved Joey, completely. I'll cherish the time we were together forever. I glanced over at Tyler.. my true love, sitting here, holding me in his arms.
"Tyler, I..." I was interrupted by an older gentleman, probably in his late 40's early 50's coming out of the office. He asked the secretary something, then looked over at us. A grimace came over his face as he looked at us... no doubt another homophobe sickened by two boys being in contact with each other. He covered it up with a fake smile as he came up to us. We stood up as he extended his hand.
"Hello, I'm John Balk. Which one of you is Blade?" He couldn't even look us in the eye as he spoke
"I am." I said, any common courtesy I usually have was thrown out the window.
"Right then, will your uh..."
I rolled my eyes, "Friend."
"Yes.. friend be joining our meeting as well?"
I looked over at Tyler who nodded. "Yes."
"Alright then, let's go into my office." We followed him into his office and took a seat in front of his desk. He went to a filing cabinet and pulled out a large folder and placed it on the desk. "Well, you've heard Mr. Marling's will and you know that he left everything to you. What we're here today for is to let you know exactly what that is." I nodded. "So, let's see here. Joey had a $25,000 dollar life insurance policy his parents were mandated to take out for him when he was proclaimed independent. The funeral expenses were covered in full by a total of $12,000 dollars. So, that leaves that policy with $13,000 dollars."
"Okay. So where do I sign so I can get out of here?" I was not in a happy mood at this point. Sitting here talking about Joey's money and his property was making feel very uneasy.
"Actually, that's not all. Westchester Prep also had out a policy for him. It was one of the conditions on him playing there. There was accident and life insurance. Now, those will both be going to you, do to the fact that the cause of death was an accident." I looked down as he spoke. Tyler reached his hand over and gripped mine. He gave it a gentle squeeze letting me know he was there for me. I looked over at him and gave him a weak smile. "So, after going through the final figures you will be receiving $113,000 dollars."
"W-what did you just say?" Not believing the number I just heard.
Mr. Balk chuckled, "I believe you heard me correctly.. the total of the insurance policies is $113,000 dollars. Now, what we can do is transfer it to your bank account, put it in a COD account, invest.. there's many options." I looked at the man in disbelief. "There was also a couple of things in his safe, I'll go get them right now." I just nodded, still in shock.
Tyler squeezed my hand so I would snap out of it. I cocked my head towards him and saw him smiling widely.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing, hehe. Just the look on your face is priceless."
I blushed slightly, "Hush boy." I teased.
"Joey made sure that you were going to be taken care of... that kind of gives me a new perspective on people. I mean, he cared for you so much, that in the rare event that something were to happen to him, he left all of that money to you."
I looked down at my feet again, "I'd trade it all to have him back." My eyes started to water, "I miss him so much, Ty." He leaned over and put his arm around my shoulder.
"I know, baby. You'll get through this, I'll make sure of it. You know we're all here for you.. Myself, Kai, Jordan, Marcus, Eric, Matt. We're not going to lose you too."
"Thanks." At that moment Mr. Balk walked back into the office. He took a seat behind his desk once again, this time placing a box on his desk. He reached inside and pulled out a wooden box about the size of a phone book. He reached over the desk and handed it to me.
"That is his bible, as well as some photographs." He paused then pulled out an envelope, "This is for you as well. It has not been opened, so only Mr. Marling knew what was written inside. I would advise that you take a moment and read it now, that way if there is any further instructions as to how his assets are to be handled, then we can take care of that now." I nodded and opened the envelope. There was a note in side addressed to me.
Hey boy! Well, if you're reading this then something has happened to me. I just want you to know that you meant the world to me, and I'm glad that we found each other again. You put the light back in my life, through your love and friendship. I'm sorry that we didn't make it as a couple. Those days, the moments, everything we shared will always be some of the happiest events in my life to me. Hopefully you're old and gray now, and I've lived my life through. If not.. well, then there's some things I need to ask you to take care of for me. I need you to look after Nikki for me.. if she's still alive at this point. She's sick, Blade. I know I should have told you before, but it was her request for it to be kept private. She's in the advanced stages of Hodgkins disease. She appears normal, but in reality she's really dying inside. All I ask is that you make sure she's okay.. until the inevitable happens. Her family has been very supportive of her and if she decides her modeling is starting to get too strenuous then someone's going to need to step up and be there for her. See that she gets to her family and that she's comfortable.
There's also another thing.. something very important.
I don't know how to ask you this, but if Nikki passes then you are the only
one I can turn to. Almost four years ago, I did something very irresponsible.
Blade, I'm sorry for asking all of this from you. Nikki and I..........
I read the rest of the letter in disbelief. The look of utter shock on my face had to be evident. I folded the letter back up and put it in my pocket. I stood up abruptly.
"Mr. Stevens, is something wrong? Was there something in that letter that I should know about?"
"N-no.. I uh, I need to go. Are we done?" Tyler looked at me strangely.
"Yes, I just need you to sign these forms," He handed the forms to me, "and get them back to me as soon as possible."
"Okay. Thanks for your time, sir." Tyler stood up and followed me as I hurriedly walked out of the office and straight out of the building.
"Blade, stop!" Tyler grabbed my arm. I tried to shake him off, but he held on tight. He spun me around and made me come face to face with him. "What's going on?"
I just shook my head at him, "I-I don't want to talk about it. We have to go.. come on." He sighed and followed me to the car. I grabbed my 'party' clothes out of the back and started to strip down. Tyler looked at me strangely.. I guess he didn't expect me to be so outgoing. Oh well. I pulled off my dress shirt and through it into the car. I started to put on my baby blue silk shirt when I caught Tyler's gaze. His eyes were fixated on my half naked form. "Like what you see?" I teased.
He shook himself out of his daze and blushed, "Uh..." I snickered at him and continued changing. After I buttoned up the shirt, I lost my pants. I pulled on a pair of form fitting blue jeans. As soon as I finished up I hopped in the car and waited for Tyler to follow. He didn't move an inch. I couldn't see his face from inside the car, but he was not making any move to get into the car.
"Tyler?" I called out to him. He didn't respond. I pulled myself half way out of the car so I could see him. As soon as my eyes met his he looked away. There was a faint sadness in them. "What's wrong?"
He cleared his throat, "N-nothing." He put on a fake smile, "Let's go party!" If Tyler wasn't such a good actor most people would've seen through his suddenly bubbly facade. I sighed and started up the car. He hopped in and we went on our way to Marcus's.
As we approached the house we could hear music blaring, and see people scattered all over the place. I parked about 4 houses down.. hopefully that's enough distance from other peoples cars. I don't need anyone smashing my car up. Tyler and I walked up to the front door. Marcus's place is fairly big, and it's a good thing too. There had to be over a hundred people there. I hit the doorbell and waited for someone to answer. The door opened and more noise flooded outside. Marcus appeared with a big smile on his face. "Hey guys." He said warmly. He reached his hand out and gave me daps. He went for what appeared to be the same thing with Tyler, but instead pulled him closer to him and kissed him gently on the lips. Marcus's eyes lit up at Tyler's touch. A pang of jealousy and hurt shot through me.
"Excuse me." I said and pushed past them. I heard Tyler call out my name, but I just kept on walking.
There was a group of people huddled in the living room, talking, dancing, and just goofing off. Loud laughter came from what I assumed was the basement as I was passing by the door. I decided to go down and see who was there. I descended the stairs, listening to the pounding beat of some techno remix of Britney Spears' Boys. I stopped in my tracks when the room came into view.
There was a divider that was like a pole in the middle of the room. A large group of people, including Kai, Matt, Tanya, Anna, Drew and Andy were standing around laughing and watching... Eric pole dance. Eric was dirty dancing with the pole, shirtless with his pants unzipped. That didn't last long as he chucked the pants as well. Matt and Eric's friend Dave were hollering, and had money in their hands. Eric swayed his hips to the beat, then ludely thrusted his hips out. When Eric started to pull his boxers down I was ready to stop him. He just teased, bringing the waistband down enough to see the top of his ass and his pubes. I scanned the room, catching the lustful glances Eric was receiving from both male and female onlookers. Eric is dead sexy, but he's my brother.. so that's just not what I need to be seeing. Dave walked up closer to Eric and stuffed a dollar into Eric's waistband. Eric grabbed Dave by the collar and started to pull him closer, then pushed him back. Everyone laughed at Eric's teasing. Then Matt came up to him. A huge smile crept across his face as well as Eric's. Matt waved a 5 dollar bill in front of Eric, causing him to get closer and grind up against Matt. Everyone laughed again, thinking of it as only a joke. Matt pushed Eric back, and grabbed the top of his boxers. He started to slip the money into them, when instead he pulled the waist band out, and looked down into Eric's boxers. He looked back up and gave him a thumbs up, bringing a roar of laughter through the room. Eric smiled and blushed. The music ended and he stepped away from the pole. Everyone patted him on the back, quite a few of them giving him a quick smack on the ass. He picked up his clothes then turned around, coming face to face with me. He blushed a deep red, as I gave him a stern look. The crowd around us gave a loud ooo, thinking he was in trouble. A smile spread across my face as I pulled out a 10 dollar bill. Eric laughed and swatted my hand away. The crowd broke up a little bit after that, going off to various corners of the basement.
"Nice show." I teased.
"Thanks. So, what do you think? Do I have a career in go go dancing ahead of me?" He snickered.
"I don't think so. You don't have the body for it." I teased.
Eric's jaw dropped, "Are you calling me fat?!?"
"Well, if you're so buff why don't you get over there and dance?" He challenged. I raised my eyebrows at him. "Or maybe you're chicken." That did it. I walked over to the stereo and put on 'I'm A Slave For You'. The beat pounded through the room and a roar of cheers erupted as I stepped up to the pole. I grinded with the pole, spinning around it. I unbuttoned my shirt and threw it at Eric. He laughed as I pulled myself to the top of the pole and slid down, twirling around it like a stripper. I stepped up to the crowd, turning around and shaking my ass for them. Everyone was laughing. I walked up to Kai, staring him straight in the eyes. I grinded up against him, leaving him speechless. A girl beside him came closer and started dancing in front of me as well. I pushed Kai, causing him to fall over onto a bean bag laughing. The girl danced.. not very well I might add, trying to hold my attention. She grabbed for the button of my jeans and unsnapped them. I stepped out of them, now in just a pair of black boxers. I noticed Marcus and Tyler coming down the stairs out of the corner of my eye. I quickly ran over and swung around the railing, a shocked look coming over their faces as they saw me. Then I noticed someone sitting on a couch behind the crowd laughing. I pushed my way through to Jordan. His laughing stopped and he gave me a questioning look as I approached. I just grinned at him. I straddled him, seductively waving my hips in front of his face. I grinded with the beat into Jordan, pushing my ass into his crotch. I could feel his arousal, causing me to get even more into it. I glanced over at Kai, just to make sure he wasn't getting mad. He smiled at me, nodding. I ran my hands down Jordan's body, then up under his shirt. I started to reach for his pants when the music came to the end.. I yelled out, "Get Nasty." I smiled and got off of Jordan. He blushed deeply, but the smile on his face told me he enjoyed it.
I stepped away semi aroused, but not embarrassed at all. My eyes met with Tyler's, a small grin on his face. I returned it, then put my clothes back on. Kai spoke up, "Everyone, let's hear it for the Stripping Brothers!!" Everyone clapped and cheered as Eric and I took a bow.
"I was just joking, Eric. You're dead sexy, hehe."
"I know." He snickered, "But then again, I'm not up to par with big bro hehe." I smiled at him then went over to talk to Jordan. I sat down next to him, with Kai on the other side.
"Hey, Jordan. How are you feeling?"
"I'm good. Being out of that wheelchair has been such a huge relief. Of course hot boys giving me lap dances doesn't hurt either." He joked.
"That's great bud. I'm so glad you're here." I hugged him tightly, with thoughts of Joey running through my mind. My eyes became glassy, and Jordan noticed before I could hide them.
"I-I miss him too." He stammered out. Our eyes met, both on the verge of shedding tears. Kai watched on with a mournful look on his face. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the envelope with the letter in it. I had placed the pictures that were in the box in with the letter. "I wanted to look through these with you." I removed the pictures from the envelope and placed the the letter back in my pocket. I leaned over Jordan and started flipping through the pictures. There were a few of Joey and Nikki, smiling and holding hands. He looked so happy. Then we came to one of Jordan and Joey. They had an arm around each others waste and were smiling.. they were happy. Jordan sniffled while looking at the picture, a sad smile upon his face. Kai put his arm around him to comfort him. There were some single photos of Joey, smiling, laughing, just being goofy. Then there was one of me.. just me. I was sleeping. I looked at it strangely. Jordan looked at it as well, then flipped it over. On the back it said, My Sleeping Angel. I smiled, then immediately became saddened by the next picture. It was of me and Joey.. sitting on my bed, kissing through our smiling lips. Eric took the picture of us that night. God, I wish Joey was here....
"Alright y'all, it's time for spin the bottle!" Marcus yelled out, breaking Jordan and I out of our reverie. "Anyone who wants to play, form a circle in the middle of the room." Jordan, Kai and I all gave each other a look like what the hell.. might as well have some fun.
We sat in a circle, oh I'd say about 12 of us. Kai, Jordan, Myself, Eric, Matt, Tyler, Marcus, Dave, Tanya and three other girls I didn't recognize. A two to one ratio of boys to girls.. yeah baby! Marcus handed the bottle to Matt first. With a big grin on his face he spun the bottle on the slippery hardwood floor. It went round and round until by some extreme luck, it stopped on Eric. Matt tried hard to hide his smile, but the corners of his mouth would not stay down. Both he and Eric scooted to the center of the circle. They gazed into each others eyes, then slowly leaned into one another. Their lips touched, a certain glow coming over them as they kissed.
"Remember, you have to go for 30 seconds." Marcus stated. I watched on as my baby brother made out with his boyfriend. I could tell that it wasn't just a kiss to them, it was a passing of their love between each other. I'm so happy he has found someone who loves him as much as he loves them. "5 seconds." Eric pulled away from Matt when Marcus said that. He grinned, then stuck his tongue out. Matt looked surprised, but then leaned back in and practically inhaled Eric's tongue into his mouth. Everyone cheered them on, even the girls who had seemed to be a little overwhelmed by two boys kissing. "Time's up." Eric and Matt drew their lips back reluctantly, and returned to their respective places. "Now that's how this game is supposed to be played!" Marcus's enthusiasm has to be almost impossible to match. He's so into whatever he does. "Okay, Eric it's your turn."
Eric smiled, then spun the bottle. It came to a stop on his australian friend, Dave. I couldn't quite read the look on his face, he pretty much stayed neutral about it. Eric on the other hand, had that trademark mischievous grin on his face. "Come and get it aussie." Eric teased.
"Oh, you know you want me." Dave retorted. Their lips met, and what started off as a casual kiss turned into an all out porno kiss! Haha, I think Eric was a bit surprised at the sudden aggression on Dave's part. I thought he was going to swallow his face. The crowd yelled in amusement as it seemed like a competition of who could get more of their tongue in the others' mouth. Dave seemed to win that one, as he pretty much ended up on top of Eric as Marcus called time. Eric sat up, looking disheveled and daze. A goofy grin was on his face as he was pulled back to his spot. "And that's how you're supposed to kiss." Dave said laughing. One of the girls I didn't know decided to say something.
"Okay, I think that's enough gay stuff, how bout a new rule....."
"The rule is, you kiss who the bottle lands on." Dave stated.
"Did I ask you? Fag...."
"Why don't you go light a match and blow your box up, cuz that's the only way you're ever going to get a bang." I tried to hold in my laughter, but it just burst out. Soon everyone else followed, and the girl got up and stomped off.
"Nice job." I said. Dave smiled at me, then took his turn with the bottle. It came to a halt on Kai. I watched Jordan's reaction, but it seems like everyone knows this is just for a good time, so he nudged Kai along. Hehe, it was like Eric/Dave part two.. this one ending with Kai winning the battle, as he ended up on top of Dave at the end. Kai raised his arms in victory as he went back to his seat. Dave just went off to his spot, with the same goofy grin on his face that Eric had minutes before. Kai took his turn.... and it landed on me.
I moved to the middle nervously. I don't know why the butterflies appeared in my stomach, but they were there in full force. Kai gave me a weak smile, as if he was feeling the same thing. Our lips came together, meshing together tenderly. We kept it up for the full 30 seconds, with a little tongue being exchanged here and there. When time was up we pulled away, each flashing each other a wide smile. Hehe, Kai is an awesome kisser. I almost had a heart attack when he leaned in quickly one last time and pecked me on the lips. My face turned beat red and everyone started laughing. I laughed it off and spun the bottle. It looked like it was going to stop on a girl.. the one who tried to dance with me earlier, but it moved a little bit more and landed between Matt and Eric.
"Whoo! Our first three way kiss!" Marcus exclaimed.
"No way.." I said. "He's my brother." I looked at Eric after I protested. He looked a little hurt, then slowly nudged Matt forward.
"Matt can do it." He said. I sighed then moved to the center of the circle. I nodded my head towards Eric, and Matt pulled him to the center as well. I leaned over and whispered in his ear.
"You are such a brat." Eric smiled at me.
"Okay, ready and go." I almost laughed at the absurdity of a three way kiss. Can we say cliché porno? All three of us leaned in, and did our best to 'kiss'. Our tongues danced with each other, jocking for position. Eric and Matt pulled back for a moment and kissed each other passionately. I smiled at them, then they pulled apart. Matt then leaned into me and started sucking on my top lip. Somehow Eric positioned himself to get at my lower lip. I guess it is possible! I took Matt's tongue into my mouth letting him explore. I pulled away from him and Eric took his place. It was very strange kissing my brother, but extremely exotic as well. He ran his tongue along mine, inside my mouth and over my teeth, then sucked my tongue into his mouth. I did the same to him, then pulled away. Matt leaned back in and we finished up with a sloppy three way 'tongue tie'. Marcus never called time. I looked over at him, his mouth wide open. Eric, Matt and I looked down at each others' laps and noticed the obvious arousal. We giggled and slowly went back to our spots. Marcus went over and picked up the bottle.
"Whoever this lands on gets to spin." He dropped the bottle in the middle, then quickly ran back to his seat. Somehow it landed on him. He smiled widely looking at Tyler. He spun the bottle, and it just barely inched by Tyler to Tanya. The disappointment on Marcus's face was evident. Tanya had a small smile on her face as she leaned in to kiss Marcus. I watched them intently as it seemed to be a really steamy kiss. Marcus's hands traveled all over her back then to slipped to her front.. Marcus was groping her breasts right there in front of not only me and everyone else, but more specifically Tyler. I watched him for any type of reaction, but he seemed unaffected by it. When they broke apart there was something in their eyes.. lust.. or something like that. Tanya took her turn next. She ended up landing on one of the other girls, who in turn landed on the last girl. The last girl, who I came to find out was named Jenny, got the privilege of kissing Jordan.
I had to hold back my snickering as I watched Jordan's obvious discomfort. Only having one arm that he could use at the moment, he had a hard time pushing the girl off of him when time was up. She didn't seem to want to stop kissing him. Kai had to gently pry her off of him. Jordan looked like he was about ready to leave the room as soon as possible. Kai handed him the bottle then sat down beside his boyfriend. "Here ya go, J." Jordan gave Kai a loving smile. The bottle spun and spun.. for what seemed like forever until it stopped on Tyler. Lucky bastard.
Tyler walked over to Jordan so he wouldn't have to struggle to get to the center. He sat down in front of him and gave him a warm smile. Tyler leaned forward and started kissing Jordan. I thought I could hear a small whimper come from Jordan, but I'm not sure. If kissing was a career Tyler would be a billionaire. There's just something about his gentle approach and tender technique that makes your knees week. Time was called and Tyler pulled away. Jordan was all smiles after that. Kai playfully slugged him in the shoulder. "You better be grinning like that after we kiss next time!" Kai whispered, a sly grin on his face.
Tyler took his turn next. It seemed like everyone it passed would sigh. I guess they all want a piece of him. I don't know if I was imagining things or what, but the bottle seemed to go into slow motion. It came to a dead stop on Eric.. or so we all thought. Instead it kept going, passing Kai and Jordan.. then it really stopped. On me. I looked up from where the bottle was to look at Tyler. He looked at me completely serious, a strange glassy look in his eyes. We both moved in front of the circle. He put his hand up to my face and ran it down my cheek. Our eyes were burning into one anothers', trying to see what thoughts were going through our minds. I leaned forward and brought my lips a millimeter away from his. We never lost eye contact, as he went to move that one millimeter forward...
"Okay! Everyone's kissed someone already, so the game is over. So you guys don't have to go through with it. Let's all go upstairs and mingle a bit." Marcus. Him speaking up caused Tyler and I to break out of our daze. I shot Marcus a dirty look, but he had already started up the stairs. I looked back at Tyler who mustered up a weak smile. He slowly got up as well, then walked up the stairs. Slowly, but surely so did everyone else. I stayed in place though.. just caught up in my own thoughts. I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned around to see Eric, with a sympathetic look on his face.
"Are you okay?"
"You know now don't you?" It was more of a statement than a question. I knew he exactly what he was talking about.
'Yes, I do. He's the one." I said sadly, "But he's not mine."
"Blade, Tyler is in love with you. Not Marcus."
"If he's in love with me and not Marcus, then why is Marcus his boyfriend?"
"He can't wait for you forever, Blade. Tell him and soon." Eric walked upstairs to see everyone else. Just tell him.. yeah.. right. I forced myself to go join everyone else upstairs as well.
A few hours went by, with dancing, and people doing crazy things. Somehow Marcus had managed to avoid me completely since spin the bottle. Why doesn't he just make a sign saying I didn't want you kissing my boyfriend? I went out back to find Kai and Jordan. They were sitting on the deck by the pool. I watched as Tyler sat down with them, followed closely by Marcus of course. Eric and Matt were in the pool, splashing each other and being the goof balls that they are. Hehe, of course there was the occasional under water groping going on as well. Eric waved at me then hopped out of the pool. He started running over to me, when his foot slipped and he went down with a thud. I made my way over to him as quickly as possible. Kai was right behind. I put my hand under his head and tried to see if he was coherent.
"Eric, can you hear me?" He mumbled something I couldn't make out. "Kai can you try and talk to him while I call for an ambulance?"
"Wait, I'll just call my mothe...."
He was cut off by a roar of laughter. "Aww, the little faggot hurt himself. Maybe he'll join the other one in hell." My head snapped in the direction of the voice. Trevor Keiko.
"Blade.." Kai called out to me, but I ignored him. I headed straight for Trevor.
"What did you say?" I asked, a scary tone to my voice.
Trevor looked at me, his confidence fading fast. One of his friends nudged him though. "I said, maybe your faggot brother will do everyone a favor and die just like that pussy Joey." He took a cheap swing at me, but I ducked and side kicked his right leg. He tried to fight back, but it was no use. I threw him into the railing of the deck, and speared him right through it before he could recover. The railing splintered everywhere, as we fell to the ground. Flashes of Joey, his funeral, the hospital.. they all went through my mind. I punched Trevor hard in the jaw as I straddled him.
"You mother fucker. Don't you ever.. ever talk about him like that." I laid punch after punch into his face. Tears fell from my eyes as I pounded Trevor. Marcus came up behind me and tried to pull me off.
"Blade, come on..."
"Back off Marcus!" I picked Trevor up by his hair and through him into the fence that surrounded the pool area. I set him up against it, wound up and hit him in the abdomen with a sickening smack. Marcus grabbed my arm, so I backhanded him. He stumbled backwards not expecting the blow. I dumped Trevor over the fence and through a lawn chair on the other side.
"You're going to kill him, Blade!" Marcus yelled, angry and frustrated. I turned my head towards him.
"He deserves it." The tone of my voice was so cold it chilled me to the bone. I was in overdrive, my emotions were controlling me. I hopped the fence and picked the now unconscious Trevor up again. I stuck his bloody face in the pool water to wake him up. He mumbled something, but I think I broke his jaw, so it wasn't coherent. "Did Joey deserve to die, Trevor? Does my brother deserve to die? For what? For loving someone.. for being human beings? You make me sick, you sorry excuse for a person. You should die, you should have been in that car wreck. Not Joey, you. You should be buried six feet underground, your so called friends suffering from the pain of loss. You should have to feel the pain Joey felt when he was being cut open on an operating table. Your heart should just stop and end your useless existence. You make me sick." I spit in his face.
I saw his friends approach, but back off as I threatened to deliver more damage. I felt another hand on my shoulder. I was about to swing wildly at whoever it was when they spoke. "Blade, please stop." My eyes averted their gaze from Trevor to the voice behind me. As soon as they locked onto Tyler's eyes, I started sobbing. He put his arm around me and helped me up. We walked away back toward the deck leaving Trevor barely conscious, hanging over the side of the pool. All eyes were on me.. in shock of what had just happened. Eric was standing up, leaning against Matt. As soon as I came up to him I wrapped my arms around him and just cried. Eric shakily held onto me.
"Alright, party's over. Everyone go home." Marcus's bitter voice stated. "I advise someone pick Keiko up and get him to a hospital." I glanced at him, seeing blood dripping from his lip where I hit him. "Get out of here, Blade." He turned around and walked into his house. Kai helped Jordan up and gave him his crutches. I pulled away from Eric and let Matt get back to him. I looked at Tyler, who had a concerned, but frightened look on his face.
"I-I'll um, probably stay here tonight. Are you going to be okay driving home?" He asked. I looked at him with mixed emotions. I felt hurt and sick that he was staying with Marcus and that he wouldn't at least make sure I got home alright. Then I felt anger at him.
"What do you care, Tyler? You go stay with your boyfriend, make sure he doesn't die from a cut lip." The tears flowed freely as I spoke.
"That's not fair, Blade." He said, a hurt look in his eyes.
"Yeah, what is fair? Congratulations Tyler, I hope you have a happy life with Marcus." I turned and started to walk away, "By the way, next time he doesn't want you to kiss someone, tell him not to make it so obvious. It makes him look just a tad bit insecure. And one more thing, I never stopped loving you." With that I walked out the gate and to my car.
Kai was standing there waiting for me as I approached. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." I snapped.
"Yeah, sure you are. I'm going to ride with you to make sure you get home okay."
"No you're not. I'm not going home."
"Well, then I'll go with you wherever."
I sighed, "Look Kai, I appreciate the gesture and all. But I need to be alone for awhile. I'll call you when I get home, okay?"
"Okay..." He said reluctantly, then walked away.
I jumped in my car and went on my way to the one place I have been avoiding the most. I drove about 15 miles with so much anger and fear running through me that I could barely keep y arms steady enough to hold onto the wheel. I could've killed that bastard tonight... I almost did. I drove past the tall iron gates for the Glenview Cemetery. The winding gravel path seemed to go on and on until I reached my destination.
I parked my car then stepped onto another pathway. I followed it until I came to a large angel standing upon a stone platform. I dropped to my knees in front of it, just staring at the inscription through blurred vision.
Joey Christopher Marling
July 1985 - May 2002
Heaven Needed Their Angel Back
I traced the words with my fingers, lost in my own thoughts. "How could you leave me, Joey? I need you.. I'm falling apart without you here. It's not fucking fair." I yelled at the headstone as if somehow Joey would hear me. "I miss you so much. I need your help... I need my rock back. How am I supposed to do what you asked of me? I'm only seventeen and I'm kind of hurt that you didn't tell me..." I paused, trying to calm myself down. Deep breaths, Blade. "I-I just lost it tonight.. I couldn't control my anger. I-I think I could've killed him if it wasn't for Tyler. He's another part of the problem. I'm still in love with him. You were right... he's never going to leave my heart. I don't know what to do. He's with Marcus now... Do I really have the right to come between them? Fuck.. you were always the level headed one, always knew what to do...."
"I thought you might come here." I jumped at the voice. I spun around to see Tyler standing behind me. He gave me a pleaing look, his eyes watery.
"What are you doing here, Tyler?" I asked, a twinge of anger still evident in my voice.
"Kai came in and told me you didn't head home, so I borrowed Marcus's car and came up here. You always turned to Joey when you were upset."
I looked back at the grave, sadness overwhelming me once again. "Yeah, well he's not here to comfort me anymore. How long have you been standing there?"
"Long enough." His eyes met mine, but I averted my gaze right away. "So, I'm part of your problem?"
"No.. not you specifically. More like the feelings I have for you are the problem."
"You really still love me? Even after everything I've done?"
A small smile spread across my face, "I don't really have a choice. This," I put a hand over my heart, "won't let you go. I'm in love with you... I have been since the day I met you."
Tyler smiled at my confession, "I have too. When we ran into each other on your first day at school.. from the moment our eyes met, I knew I was in love. I would get that weird funny feeling inside every time I would see you or hear your voice." He drifted off, caught up in his own thoughts. I watched the smile on his face grow wider, then suddenly disappear.
"I love you, Blade.. but I'm with Marcus. I have strong feelings for him.. maybe it's love. It's too early to tell."
"I see. Well, um, yeah.. I'm gonna head home." I started to walk past him when he put a hand out in front of me to stop me from doing so.
"I understand, Tyler. He makes you happy.. that's great. I hope he always will."
"But.." He started, but I cut him off.
"I can't do this.. not now. I-I just can't handle another round of rejection. I love you, Tyler and I'm not going to give up on you. The ball is in your court now. You decide what you do with it. I need to go.." I gave him a pleading look.
His arm started to move from my path when he suddenly grabbed my arm and pulled me into him. Before I could comprehend what was happening, I felt his lips press against mine. The taste of his silky smooth lips made me go weak in the knees. His tongue pressed against my lips, asking for access to my mouth. I obliged and soon our tongues rolled over each other with a sense of passion and urgency. That familiar spark surged through me... and then.. it was over.
Tyler leaned over and whispered in my ear, "Time's up." He smiled softly at me, then headed down the path to Marcus's car.
I smiled to myself, then turned back to Joey's grave. "Maybe you can still hear me after all. I love you, Joey, that will never change. Rest well." With that, I turned and went on my way home.
The rest of the weekend went off without a hitch. Tyler consumed my thoughts. I realized that I don't even know what that kiss on Saturday night meant. Was it just the conclusion to spin the bottle? Does it mean he wants to be my boyfriend again? Or maybe it was a goodbye kiss...
I don't even want to think about that last one. As usual, school came on Monday. One of those days that seems like it's going to never end. Time seemed like it was ready to stand still during most of the classes. Things have settled down quiet a bit since the party. I heard from a couple of people that Trevor has a fractured jaw, a broken nose and a cracked rib. As sick as it may sound, I'm glad he's in pain and suffering. The rest of the football team has kept their distance so far, but we'll see how long that lasts.
I ran to my locker as the last bell of the day rang. Once there, I took out a little stuffed puppy that says 'I Wuv You' on it. I took out a pen and wrote, Love Blade on the tag. I jogged over to Tyler's locker and unlocked his locker. I put the puppy inside, then shut the locker. It was just in time too, as Jordan approached.
I give Jordan all the credit in the world. He was on his death bed just a couple weeks ago and now he's defying all of the odds. The doctors didn't think he'd be out of a wheelchair for at least a month, and here he is hopping around on crutches. How he does it with a fractured wrist is beyond me.
He smiled warmly at me as he approached, "Hey, Blade."
"Hey, Jordan. What's up?"
"Nothing much. I'm kind of bummed about the music competition though. I really want to show what I can do out there." The music competition is tomorrow. All the hard work Jordan put into the set, design, learning the choreography, and getting the routine down was all for nothing now. There's no way for him to perform in his condition... or maybe there is...
"Jordan, I have an idea. You can sing a solo."
"I can't.. all the time slots are filled." He frowned sadly, "It's okay, Blade. You, Kai and Tyler will knock'em dead."
I looked at him, the disappointment evident under his small smile, "Jordan, you can have my slot." He looked at me as if he was hearing things.
"What did you say?"
"You can have my time slot. I'll pull out of the competition and you can perform in my place."
"I can't ask you to do that.."
"You're not. I'm doing it for you. No arguments, you are going to show them judges and talent scouts what a great singer you are. I have a lot to learn at practice. I mean, I have to learn how many weeks of choreography in less than a day?"
"You can do it. Tyler and Kai are awesome dancers, and I've seen you dance..." He giggled. I looked at him strangely then it dawned on me what he was talking about. The pole dance. I blushed furiously.
"Hehe, umm.. yeah. I know the song, so that isn't going to be a problem. I'll just have to work hard. You'll still be able to tell me what to do and not do."
"Yeah. We better get over to the auditorium and get crackin'. I think I know the perfect song to sing." He beamed.
"Hehe, hmm.. could it be a song to Kai?" I teased.
He blushed, "Maybe. Blade?"
"T-thank you.. so much." He choked up a little bit as he did his best to give me a hug. "That's why you were my first love.. you always put your friends happiness first." I smiled at him as we walked to the auditorium doors.
Music echoed through the room as we entered. Kai and Tyler were on stage already, going over the dance routine. I watched as they fluidly ran through the motions with ease. Mr. Trollis spotted us and stopped the music. He came walking over to us quickly as if we were about to run away or something.
"Blade, so great to see you here. I know things have been very rough for you lately, but I'm glad you are going about life normally. I'd like you to go up on stage with Kai and Tyler, so they can start teaching you the dance routine."
"Okay. I can't guarantee I'll be up to their level by tomorrow, but I'll give it my best shot." He gave me a pat on the back and I headed up on stage. Jordan took a seat in the front row and started writing on a piece of paper. Hehe, I guess I'm going to get a written critique of my performance.
"Okay, Blade. We're going to have you dancing like a mad man. You'll be almost as good as us when you're done." Kai joked. His eyes seemed to avert to Jordan every few seconds as he spoke. I laughed at him, but gave him a questioning look. He must've figured out what I was thinking, as he nervously cleared his throat. "Yeah.. uh lets get started."
Tyler walked up beside me and put his arm around my waist. "How are you doing?"
"I'm okay. How are you?"
"I don't know really."
"Don't worry about it." The music cued up as Kai and Tyler stood in front of me.
"Now, we're going to go in a 8 step process, so..." Kai started to go through each step, "1 and 2 and 3 and 4, then 5 and 6 and 7 and 8." I watched him do the steps a few times before I attempted to mimic him. "Good. Now, let's go through the first verse. You do what you just did again, and Tyler will do the part that one of the girls will be doing tomorrow.
The music restarted and I took my place in front of Tyler.
I don't know why you
care (why you thinkin' bout him huh?)
He doesn't even know you're there
'Cause he don't love your eyes
And he don't love your smile
Girl you know that ain't fair
Tyler's face came inches from mine, the dancing involved being very physical. I kept up with him just fine. Our eyes locked on one another, the music holding us in a trance. I just followed his lead until the music cut off.
"Great! You're a natural, Blade. Now, the car dance." Kai went through a very elaborate set of moves for what was to be used for the dance on top of the cars. After he was satisfied I had it down, we worked on our harmony. "Your voice is one that you kind of can match up well with anyone. Tyler's is a bit higher than ours, and mine is around the same tone as yours. So we shouldn't have any problem harmonizing. Basically, we all do the chorus, Tyler will be doing Justin's part, and I will be doing JC's from the video. That's as far as singing wise. What we arranged is that when it comes to the middle of the song after my solo part, that's where you will be singing."
"So you mean the part that starts with 'Ever since I saw your face.." right?"
"Yes, exactly. You will do that whole verse. Is that cool with you?"
"Yeah. So let's try it out." Just then the auditorium door opened and in walked Marcus. He took a seat a few seats from Jordan, as Jordan was hard at work on something. Marcus smiled at Tyler, who in turn looked at me nervously then smiled back at him. The music started again and we went through the routine.
Everything was going well when we came to my verse. I locked eyes with Tyler, who was dancing in front of me. My eyes searched his, wondering what he was thinking.
Ever since I saw your
Nothing in my life has been the same
I walk around just saying your name
Without you my world would end, yeah
I've searched around this whole damn place
And everything says you were meant to be
My girlfriend... oh
Tyler gave me a small grin as I sang the words to him. I glanced at Marcus who looked at us nervously. We finished up the song without a hitch. Kai walked off the stage and towards Jordan. "Mr. Trollis could you cue up that music I talked to you about, please?" Mr. Trollis nodded and did as Kai asked. He took Jordan's hand, pulling him out of his working state. Jordan looked into Kai's eyes as he brought the microphone close to his lips. The sounds of a piano and strings flowed through the arena as Kai started to sing.
Every time our eyes
This feeling inside me
Is almost more than I can take
Baby when you touch me
I can feel how much you love me
And it just blows me away
I've never been this close to anyone or anything
I can hear your thoughts
I can see your dreams
I don't know how you
do what you do
I'm so in love with you
It just keeps getting better
I wanna spend the rest of my life
With you by my side
Forever and ever
Every little thing that you do
Baby I'm amazed by you
Kai knelt down on one knee so he was eye level with Jordan. I stood next to Tyler, smiling at Kai's display of affection.
The smell of your skin
The taste of your kiss
The way you whisper in the dark
Your hair all around me
Baby you surround me
You touch every place in my heart
Oh it feels like the first time every time
I wanna spend the whole night in your eyes
I don't know how you
do what you do
I'm so in love with you
It just keeps getting better
I wanna spend the rest of my life
With you by my side
Forever and ever
Every little thing that you do
Baby I'm amazed by you
Kai reached one hand behind him, and into his pocket. He pulled something out as he went into the last verse of the song.
Every little thing that
I'm so in love with you
It just keeps getting better
I wanna spend the rest of my life
With you by my side
Forever and ever
Every little thing that you do
Oh, every little thing that you do
Baby I'm amazed by you
The music stopped as Kai finished the song. Tyler, Myself, and Marcus looked on in shock at what was happening in front of us. Jordan and Kai both had tear running down their cheeks.. tears of happiness.
"Jordan, I wanna spend the rest of my life, with you by my side, forever and ever." Kai revealed a small box in his right hand as he spoke. It finally dawned on me what was going on. He flipped it open and a shiny gleam could be seen. He held out in front of him to Jordan, "I love you with all of my heart and the past couple of months, getting to know you, sharing my love with you.. has been the best time of my life. You make me feel special, and there's nothing I want more than to be with you. W-will you marry me?"
Well, that's the end Chapter 14. A happy chapter for once =) Bet no one saw that coming =P What will Jordan say? Where does Tyler's heart really lie? What is Blade hiding? What was Joey's dark secret? Stay tuned for Chapter 15: Torn. Take care y'all, let me know what you think. jadededge.web1000.com
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