Date: Wed, 8 Sep 1999 15:24:54 -0500 From: Brent Stewart Subject: Outted in HS - Chapter 9 "The Party and Ever After" I just want to take this opportunity to thank everyone for the positive feedback and suggestions I've received. Your support means a great deal to me. The following chapter has little to do with a party and mostly about what happened with Robert and I. This has been and continues to be a true story, so the events that occur are being related as such. I think I'd be doing an injustice if I didn't share it with you as it happened. So, here we go... --------------------------- "The Party and Ever after" The week seemed to fly by. Robert and I each had practice everyday after school and then we'd meet to work on and plan the details of the 'We Survived the First Week' party. Robert invited Steve, Michelle, Debbie and Tim to help with the planning, so we would meet at my house and spend most of the evening planning and just hanging out. I felt a little put out all week because Robert and I hadn't had time to be with each other again, but he promised that he would make it up to me. I was looking forward to it. Friday arrived at last. After Robert and I finished with practice, we picked up Steve at his house and went to mine to get the gear together, and then off to the lake. Steve had changed his attitude with me so much; it was almost like he was a different person. I actually began to think of him as a friend. I guess standing up to him and showing him how it felt to be constantly put down or made the brunt of a joke, changed him. We were meeting the rest of the group out at the lake around 6 o'clock. We arrived at the camp sight at Belton Lake. Belton Lake is an Army Corps of Engineers run recreation area and mostly catered to military personnel and their families. It was huge and the area was well maintained. We unloaded Robert's car and started staking out the area where the tents would go and then started to collect rocks to arrange for the campfire. It was still pretty hot outside, so we decided that we'd swim a little after we had most of the camp set up. Robert had seemed a bit preoccupied most of the day and even at school his mind seemed to be on other things. I asked him what was up, but he said he was just thinking about the party and hoping that it went off well. As he went about his chosen duties, I watched him and thought how proud I was of how he'd taken charge and planned all this. He looked over at me and I gave him a huge smile, then looked to see where Steve was. Steve was inside of one of the tents we brought, getting the center supports in place. I walked over to Robert and pulled him off behind some bushes. "Babe, you did great! This place is awesome. I think we're going to have a blast!" I reached for Robert and gave him a deep kiss. He hugged me tight and returned the kiss with more passion than I'd expected. I broke the kiss to make sure Steve was still in the tent and told Robert, "Wow! That was some kiss. You did that on purpose didn't you!" and punched him in the shoulder. "Now just look what you've done." and pointed out the front of my shorts, which were tenting out with the hardon he gave me. "You knew that would happen!" I laughed. Robert had a big smile on his face as he said, "Actually, I HOPED that would happen." And he took me in his arms again for another kiss. Just as we finished kissing, we heard a car horn and jumped out of the bushes before someone caught us and asked what we were doing in there. It was Michelle, who had picked up Debbie and Tim, and right after them came Eric, John, Stacy and...Shelby! When Shelby got out of Eric's car and saw me, she screamed and came running towards me. "Shelby! What are you doing here?" I yelled. "I didn't know you were going to be here!" she countered. She made it to me and threw her hands around my neck and gave me a kiss that caused me to blush all over. Shelby and I had dated when we were both in middle school. She was in the grade ahead of me and initially we were greatest of friends and then later I told her I was gay. She decided to be my 'girlfriend' as a cover to protect my reputation. She was one of my closest friends, but... "I thought you had moved to East Texas somewhere?" "Naw, my father decided he wanted to stay in this area and retire. We just got back in town yesterday, so I hadn't really had time to call anyone. I saw Eric and he said there was a party at the lake and invited me along. I didn't know you knew all these people!" After saying this, she looked in Robert's direction and screamed again, "Robert! Damn you look fine without a shirt on," and she jumped on him next and gave him a smooch on the cheek. Hi Shelby!" said Robert, "Glad you could make it. Got Brent here and now you, almost feels like we're back in middle school." And he gave her a peck on the cheek in return. Michelle made it over to Robert by now and when Shelby untangled herself from Robert's neck, Michelle stepped in to give Robert a big kiss on the lips. "Hi lover," Michelle crooned, "Looks like I got here just in time!" and she smiled at Shelby. Shelby knew Michelle because they were both in cheerleading. "It's a good thing you did too," said Shelby "I was already scouting out those bushes over there to see if the ground would be soft enough." And Michelle and Shelby embraced in a hug. "Don't think I didn't guess that already! Come on!" and she grabbed Shelby's hand and pulled her off towards where she had left Debbie and Tim. "Be right back Robert." Michelle called out." I looked at Robert as he said ok to her. When our eyes met, he licked his lips and whispered, "You taste SO much better." When he said this, I burst out laughing and so did he. Most of the others turned to look at us for a few seconds, then continued unpacking their gear. After everyone had his or her belongings and area where they'd sleep chosen, we all went swimming. I had brought some swimming trunks and decided I'd change into them in the bushes where Robert and I had kissed earlier. Tim came through the brush just as I pulled my jockey's off. "Oops, sorry Brent. I needed to change into my trunks and thought this would be a good spot." He was looking everywhere he could except at me. "No problem Tim, there's plenty of room." Tim was blond like me, except his hair was much lighter. He had a great body too. His claim to fame was track and field, as well as, playing baseball. He had a younger brother that was in the same grade as me, but we hadn't met each other yet. Tim stripped off his shirt and shorts and then turned to face away from me and peeled of his boxes. I had pulled my trucks on by now and admired the view of his firm bubble butt. "Um...I'll see you in the water Tim." I said and left him to finish changing. I was done and to stay any longer would be suspicious. When I came out of the bushes, Robert was waiting for me. "Have fun in there?" he smiled. I looked around and it seemed everyone had already headed to the water. "Sure did! Tim was soooo good. Nice firm ass and very tight!" I teased. Robert got very serious and said, "I love you Brent. No matter what, I'll love you forever." We were walking towards the water and when he said this, I looked over at him and he looked lost in thought again. What was going on with him? "I couldn't help it, but girls have the tent next to yours, mine and Steve's. I was hoping that you and I could have had one to ourselves, but..." Robert began. "No problem Babe. I understand. Besides, I think it would look kind of funny if everyone else had to share four to a tent and we got one for just the two of us." Eric and John had decided to sleep in the open, next to the campfire, in sleeping bags. "Lets go! I'm hot and want to get cooled off." I pulled him along as we ran down to the lake. When we got to the edge, Robert let out a banshee scream and dove in the water. Michelle, Debbie, Stacy and Shelby had already formed the 'women's' circle after they arrived at the campsite and were swimming together, as Robert dove right in the middle of them. They screamed and when he came up about 20 yards from them, they swam in his direction to dunk him for scaring them. I laughed and proceeded to enter the water a lot slower than he had. As I moved into the water, I was surprised at how warm it was. As I got deeper, it started to get cooler and I enjoyed the feel of it as the heat of the day drained from my body. Tim came barreling out of the woods and jumped in right next to where I was making my slow progress. Well, when he hit the water, I got soaked. I hadn't noticed where Steve was and the next thing I knew, I was fighting water and laughing, as Steve tried to pull me under. Eric and John had made it out to Robert and the three of them were defending themselves against the 'women's circle'. We swam and horsed around for about an hour then climbed out to get some food cooking. All of us guys headed for the bushes after we'd gathered dry clothes to change into. The girls elected to use their tent. After changing we all gathered around the campfire and Eric and John started building up the fire. They'd decided to be the cooks for the evening and we sat around and bullshitted while they got things ready for dinner. Shelby kept looking at me across from the fire. "Lets go for a walk Brent." She said to me. "Sure." I looked to Robert and he was involved in a conversation with Michelle. Debbie looked at Shelby and I. Evidently Shelby had explained that she and I had dated in school and Debbie didn't look pleased that she and I were going off alone. We walked along a path that lead to the lake and along the bank. "So, what has my Brent been up to? Do you like high school?" "I didn't at first, but it's gotten a lot better. Sort of hard to find your way the first couple of days, but I guess everyone has that problem. I'm glad you're going to be there too. I've missed you." I said. "I've missed you too...Brent, can I ask you something? It's kind of personal, but you know me. I've got to ask when something strikes me as strange." We had walked about 50 yards from the campsite and stopped to sit on an outcropping of rocks that hung a little over the water. "Strange? What's struck you as strange? You know more about me than anyone else," then I chuckled. "Well, almost more than anyone else." I corrected. "You've changed you know? You seem much more open and outgoing than I remember. Not as shy and I've noticed that something has changed with you and Robert. Michelle mentioned how strange she thought it was that Robert spends so much time with you and so little with her. I told her you two have been best friends for a long time, but she said it seems different. Is it? Are things different?" she looked intently at me as she waited for my reply. I looked away from her and down to my feet. Oh no, Michelle thinks there's something going on with Robert and I. Any day now and we're going to be found out, I thought. I then looked at Shelby and she was still waiting for an answer. "I guess things have changed and are a little different. I am only going to tell you this because of how close we are and how much I trust you Shelby. The same oath we swore in the 7th grade applies to this, ok?" "Ok, I swear. So tell me." She settled in and drew her knees up under her chin. "I love Robert, Shelby. Every time we're together, I can't help but show him in little ways how much. He...uh...Shelby, he loves me too," I paused to get her reaction. "What do you mean he loves you too? Of course he does, he's your best friend. But Brent, don't get your hopes up. You know how Robert is. I don't think he can love you the way you love him." "You don't understand Shelby. He LOVES me too. He told me he does and we're...uh..." Why am I so nervous? Of all people Shelby will understand. But will Robert when he finds out I told her about him and I. "We're IN love Shelby. He wants to spend his life with me and I with him. We've made love." I stopped to look at her as intently as she had me. She was shocked. She kept blinking her eyes and couldn't seem to focus them. "BRENT! That's great!" she reached out and grabbed me in a hug. Then she dropped a bomb. "So what have you two decided to do? Is Robert going to go to college here in Texas after he graduates? That will be so cool when the two of you get back together. Does his parents know? Oh my God! What about yours?" Then she giggled and said "Jeez, you two have really got Michelle fooled. She has no idea. She thinks that Robert is spending a lot of time with you because he wants to break off with her." "Wait a minute," I stopped her. "What do you mean it will be great when we get back together?" "What? You know. I mean I'm sure you too will write and everything and that if you love him as much as you say and he loves you as strongly, there'll be no problem. It's just a little over a year and a half until he graduates. Maybe he will get a swimming scholarship at UT." "What are you talking about Shelby? You sound as if Robert were going somewhere. He's not going anywhere!" What the fuck is she getting at? Shelby was blinking again and had a confused look on her face. Slowly her expression changed and the look she had now was scaring me. "Um...you see...Michelle was telling me...uh...that Robert told her...she says that's why she thinks he wants to break up with her Brent! That's what she said, I swear she did...she told me while we were swimming..." "WHAT DID SHE TELL YOU?? I don't know what your talking about Shelby. You're not making any sense." All of a sudden there were tears in Shelby's eyes and she jumped up and said, "I'm so sorry Brent...I have a big mouth and I just thought you KNEW..." and then she started running back towards the camp site. I was in a state of confusion. It took me about 15 minutes before I could even move to go after her. As I made it back to the campsite, Shelby and the rest of the girls were nowhere to be seen. Robert looked like he was about to have come to find me, but there was no need now. "What the fuck happened to Shelby, Brent? She came running up here and told me she was sorry then asked Michelle if she'd take her home. They just left about 5 minutes ago. Where were you? Didn't you hear me calling for you? What happened?" Steve, Eric, Tim and John were all standing around looking at me as if I had done something horrific to Shelby and wanted answers as well. "I didn't do ANYTHING to her," I addressed them all collectively. "We were talking and she told me something that she thought I knew," and I looked at Robert as I said this, "When she saw that I didn't know what she was talking about, she got upset and ran back here. I don't know why she wanted to leave. I need to talk to her. I wouldn't ever do anything to hurt Shelby, she's my GIRLFRIEND!" I yelled at them all. They all kind of cringed back when I yelled. I was getting really pissed and I think they knew they had made an assumption about what had happened and were a bit surprised that I was Shelby's boyfriend. I stalked off towards the tent that I was sharing with the others; Robert was hot on my heels. As I got in the tent, I started throwing my things into the gym bag I had brought as Robert walked in. "What are you doing? Where are you going Brent? Your not leaving are you? I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make it out like you had actually HURT her. She was just so upset and when she told me she was sorry, I didn't know what the fuck was going on." I continued to pack as he spoke to me. "Brent? Are you going to talk to me?" I turned on him and said, "It's not what I said to her Robert. It's what she was trying to say to me. Something Michelle told her and Shelby thought I knew. I still don't know what the hell it is myself. But evidently YOU do! What is it Robert? What does Michelle know about you that I don't? Huh? What??" The blood seemed to seep from Robert's face as I said this to him. So there was something. "Not here Brent. I can't tell you here. I'll be right back." And he turned and left the tent. He came back about 15 minutes later. "Are you packed? We're leaving. I told the guys that we had to go find Shelby and talk to her." "I want to talk to YOU! What's going on Robert?" He started packing his clothes in his bag. "We are Brent, we are. Just finish up and lets go. The guys said they'd bring everything when they leave. Are you ready?" He picked up his bag and threw it over his shoulder and helped me stand up. I threw my bag on my shoulder and looked at him, "You're scaring me Robert. I'm more scared than I think I have ever been in my life." "I love you Brent, just remember that and you'll see there's nothing to be scared about. There's just something I have to tell you and your going to have to hear me out. I love you! Do you hear me?" and pulled me into his arms. I hugged him back and held tight. I was afraid that I'd lose him if I let go. "Come on," he said as he broke the hug and grabbed my arm to lead us out of the tent. "I'll see yall later. We have to take care of this. Sorry guys and thanks for taking care of the site," Robert yelled over at the guys as they sat around the campfire. "No problem Robert," Steve yelled back. "It'll all work out Brent," he added as Robert and I got into his car and drove away. We were both silent until Robert took a side road after driving about 10 miles on Lake Road. He brought the car to a stop and turned off the engine. "Brent I need you to listen to me. Do you want to sit here or get out to talk?" I opened the car door in answer to his question and he got out on his side. He came around the car and sat on the hood. I walked to stand in front of him and he pulled me in close to stand between his legs. "What is it Robert, please tell me. I can't stand this anymore. Are you sick? Is it that rash you found? What?" "No, no...I'm not sick. That rash was just what your mom said it was. She called the school and they checked the pool. Maintenance had put too much chemical in the water. It's fine. It's nothing like that. Brent," he swallowed hard as if a lump had come to his throat, "I'm..." he looked right in my eyes and I saw his eyes tear up. Mine stated to water also from just seeing his, "I'm leaving Brent. You remember when your dad said that he went to a going away lunch because one of the Major's that works for him is leaving? Well...it was my dad. He got orders and we PCS in two months to Germany. He just told me yesterday. I swear it. I told Michelle at school today but I just couldn't tell you. I wanted to tell you when we were alone." Tears were freely flowing from Robert's eyes by now. He used his hand to wipe his face. "Cutey, do you here me. I don't want to go, but I HAVE too. My dad won't let me stay to finish school. I asked and he said I have to go. Brent, please say something! Cutey...?" I was looking at Robert when he said, "I'm leaving" and after that I didn't hear anything else. The blood rushed to my head and I could hear my heart pounding in my ears. The area we were in seemed to get darker and all sound was being drowned out by the sound of my own heart. I pulled away from Robert and in a very faint voice, I asked, "Your leaving? Your leaving, Robert? No your not." I was shaking my head to emphasize, "You promised me you wouldn't leave. I asked you Robert. Do you remember? I asked you after you told me you loved me and you said you'd never leave." This was a joke. It has to be. They all cooked this up to scare me, and now they think I'm going to fall for it. But as I looked at Robert and saw his tear streaked face and the tears continue to fall, I knew it wasn't. "You lied to me. Why would you do that Robert? You lied to me. I asked you! I told you how I felt. You told me you loved me Robert." I continued to back away from him and he was moving forward to intercept me. "Brent! It's my father Brent. He's leaving and I have to go!" Robert pleaded with me for understanding, " I want to stay! I'd run away if I could and hide out so I'd never have to leave you, but he'd catch me. Don't you understand Cutey? I love you!" and he continued to walk towards me. As he reached me and put out his arms to grab me, I dropped to the ground on my knees. I looked up at him, standing over me, and thought I understood what was happening, "Oh God Robert, don't leave me," I begged. "I love you! I want to make love to you! I swear it. With practice and all, there just hasn't been time. I'm sorry Robert..." I looked around and started to take my shirt off, "We can make love right here Robert. Right here! I'll show you. I love you more than you know." I reached up and took hold of his hands and pulled him towards me on the ground. "Make love to me Robert. You'll see how much I love you!" Robert's shoulders were shaking with emotion as he stood over me and cried. "Brent! What are you talking about?? I know you love me," and he too dropped to his knees in front of me. "Stop saying this, I know you love me," he said and reached for me. I reached for him and held him tight to me. "Cutey it's not you." He spoke in my ear. "We have two months before we leave. I'm going to spend every second I can with you and I don't care if everyone at school finds out that I'm in love with you." He kissed me on the lips and I opened my mouth to take in his tongue. As he slid his tongue forward, I met it with my own. I savored every ounce of his mouth as I leaned back and pull him on top of me in the grass. "I love you Robert. Please make love to me," I said as I started to pull his shirt over his head. "I want to feel you in me. I want you." I pulled his shirt off and reached between us to undo the button on my Cavericci jean shorts. After undoing my shorts and zipper, I reached for Robert's and untied the drawstring that was holding them up. "Are you sure Cutey? You understand what I've told you don't you?" he asked. "I understand Babe. I need you. Please?" and I looked into his eyes and knew that the guy I loved would not leave me after I showed him how much I 'REALLY' loved him. I was scared about having him in me, but he'd know that I gave myself to him completely and he'd never leave me. He'd see, and I smiled up at him and removed my shorts. He leaned back and brought his shorts down and then removed them over his sandals. I saw how much I excited him by the way his dick was point straight up towards his stomach. I looked at it and licked my lips in anticipation of feeling it in my mouth and tasting the flow of pre-cum as I made him ready to enter me. Robert leaned forward and our lips met in a kiss. I put my hand around his cock and felt his hand enclose mine and we once again drank in each other's mouths. I rolled over and now was on top of him and I kissed down his chest. His nipples were standing erect and hard as pencil erasers. I used my tongue to circle each nipple and gently flick them. Moans escaped from Robert and I worked on his abs. My tongue traced a path to below his navel where the first sparse growth of hair formed a dark line leading to his pubic area. I used the saliva from my mouth to wet these hairs and moved lower to where I could smell the sweet aroma of his cock and I licked the top of its head. I was rewarded with the tangy taste of his cock lube as it oozed out to coat my tongue. I cupped his balls in my hand and gently worked them as I lower my mouth over his hardness. Robert gasped as he felt the warmth envelop him and my tongue work in circles to give him as much pleasure as I could. I removed my mouth and peered up at him and said, "I love you Babe." And then returned to him. I heard him say he loved me too and then he placed his hands on my head and ran his fingers through my hair. After using the juices of my mouth and those flowing freely from his cock to lube him, I got up and went to the car. I took a bottle of aloe vera I had brought for sunburns and squeezed a good portion into my hand. I returned to Robert and smoothed the cream over his shaft. "Cutey are you sure about this?" he moaned as my hand brought it's own pleasure to him. I answered him by taking more cream and liberally spreading it on my shoot. I worked my middle finger up and into me and moved it around to coat my insides. Then positioning myself on top of Robert and guiding his cock towards my hole, I began to insert him into me. Robert had positioned himself on his elbows to watch me as I lowered my self. He leaned forward and we kissed as I continued. I felt the head of his cock slip easy into me; the fullness created by just this small part of his member caused me to increase the urgency of our kiss. My eyes began to water as I inserted another couple of inches in me and then it felt like a barrier was breeched as his cock entered me completely and his pubic hairs brushed against my cheeks. I held myself in this position as Robert and I kissed each other passionately. I took deep breaths and concentrated on relaxing my muscles. The pain was overpowering but with Robert rubbing my legs and his tongue working my mouth, I was relaxing and the pain eased. After what must have been 10 minutes, I slowly raised myself from his shaft about 3 inches and shuddered as his cock head rubbed against my prostrate. I tightened my hole and Robert groaned as he breathed, "Ohhh...your so tight. Are you ok? Does it hurt?" "It did at first, but now it feels amazing. I'm going to pick up speed and I want you to start to fuck me Robert. I want to feel you moving in and out of me." As I picked up speed and rocked my body on top of him, he moved hips up to insert himself deeper into me, following the rhythm I was creating. It was incredible. The heat of him inside of me and the friction being created against my insides was to much for me and I yelled out, "I'm cumin Babe!!" and a volley of my boy juice shot out of my cock and spray across Robert's chest. I continued to ride him as shot after shot of cum escaped my cock and the muscles in my ass contracted with each spasm. Before I was finished, Robert moaned loudly and pulled my waist down hard on his cock as said, "Oh God Brent, I'm cumin." I was amazed by the fact that I could actually feel his cum shoot inside of me and coat my hole. It felt hot and silky smooth, as his cock was drenched in his own fluids. My muscles continued to contract around him as he pressed deep into me and spent his load. When he was done, I collapsed down on him and he encircled my body with his strong arms. We were both sweating and breathing deeply as our orgasm subsided and left our bodies totally exhausted. As Robert's dick lost it's hardness, he slipped from my hole and I felt empty inside. I could feel his cum sliding from inside me and run along the crack of my cheeks. I moved from the top of him and lay beside him as we continued to hold each other. We stayed like this for at least 20 minutes, until I leaned over him and gave him a kiss. When I'd finished kissing him, I looked him in the eyes. "Babe, I understand now. I know you love me and if you could stay with me, you would." Tears came to my eyes unbidden. "I just realized how stupid I was when you told me you were leaving and how I reacted. It just hurts me to my soul to know that you will be leaving me and I will not have you." And I cried on his chest as he cried with me there in the dark, on some side road. "I love you," I said "And I understand." We lay there for another hour it seemed, and then both dressed. Robert brought me to my house and spent the night in my bed. We held each other as if it were for the last time. I cried several more times throughout the night. I didn't cry for the loss of his love, I knew I had that. I cried for the loss I knew would come when he left me alone and I said goodbye to him for the last time. We had two months. Two months. -------------------------------- So completes Chapter 9. I was 14 years old when this happened to me. I'm 21 years old now and writing this was more difficult than I imagined possible. The emotional tie I shared with Robert remains to this day even though we seldom write each other or even speak. The remaining chapters of this story will concentrate on how I deal with being alone and gay at high school and the development of a friendship and bonding that I thought was not possible ever again, once I lost Robert. Robert and I spent the two months he had left with each other as much as possible. He spent almost every night at my house. How we managed to keep my parents and the students at high school from seeing the love and pain we shared during those months remains surprising to me. I guess that when you deny what your eyes see, and what your mind cannot comprehend as possible, you truly are in the dark. Comments are always welcome. brent@cutey.com