Date: Tue, 28 Oct 2003 16:57:02 +0000 From: Jose Doesnt Subject: Pookie9 Hi there. Sorry again for the delay. I'm trying to be quicker, but shcool just gets in the way. I have to thank everyone that has mailed me and say that I love to receive mal and ask you to send me your opinions and ideas to pookie_story@hotmail.com. I also have to thank my editors, Paul for keeping up with me, and Jack for returning and wanting to continuing editing for me. Either way, I hope you enjoy and send me lots of emails:)))9 Pookie9 "You are so cute. You know that?" I asked the small dog. He licked my cheek, happy with the compliment. I loved this here. I loved being around animals. They weren't fake and most of all were loyal, and didn't judge you, they just plain love you! The dog I was holding was abadoned when he was 3 weeks old, he almost died but Sheyla managed to save him. He was growing really well now and we needed to find him a place. I put him down to let him exercise a bit, he started sniffing the ground and trailed off. I smiled and grabbed some food for him. "Hey Brad!" "Hey Sheyla, managed to find some spare time to come down here?" I asked smiling. "Always." she said picking the dog up. Sheyla did love animals, she made the right choice when she decided to become a vet. We could see on her face that she loved to help animals and be near them. "So, how are you?" she asked, putting the dog down. "Ok." "Just ok?" she asked, leaning against the wall. "Yeah, I talked to Pete today. He told me about the group, thank God you took him there, at least he has someone to talk to now." "I can take you there if you want!" "Maybe some day, who knows..." "So, how is Bri, I haven't seen her since last week!" My smile faded "She's ok." "Is something wrong between you two?" "No, everything is fine." She looked at me waiting for me to continue, I just continued feeding the dogs. "You know, once I got angry with my best friend and didn't told her a thing. I just pretend everything was fine. You know what happened?" "What?" "Two weeks later we weren't speaking to each other, and neither of us knew why." she said. "I'm sorry!" "You know what was the worst of it. We never talked about it. We just drifted apart. True friends talk about everything. EVERYTHING!" "I know." I said, grabbing the little dog. Someone called Sheyla. "Well, I'm needed again, I'll see you later, and think about what I said!" "Sure, see ya!" .... "Hi honey, Bri's upstairs!" My mom said without taking her eyes from the TV. I groaned and walked to my room. I entered to find Bri looking at a picture on my desk. It was taken two years ago when we were at the beach. We had an arm around each other, smiling at the camera, ignoring everyone and everything. She was smiling, probably remenbering all the good times we had spent together. "How long have you been here?" I asked scaring her. "Just a few minutes." she said turning around. "So?" I said dropping my bag near my bed. "So..." she started. I looked at her, waiting for her to speak. She seemed a little lost, like she didn't knew what to say. "Brad, I... Well, I came here to talk to you!" "I'm listening!" I said. "What's wrong?" "Nothing's wrong." I lied. Sheyla's talk came back, I shrugged that away and put on my serious face. I had long ago mastered the art of hiding behind a mask. "Don't say that. Something's wrong, I can feel it." "Nothing." I continued. "Brad. Tell me... please." she said looking straight at me. I knew what she doing. She was using "the face". She knew I couldn't resist it. "Bri, it's going to sound stupid!" I said looking down. "Brad, please." she said grabbing my hand "Tell me!" I looked straight at her "I feel like you don't spend any more time with me. It's like you I don't even know you!" She stared at me, I knew that she was deep in thought. I started to get worried, she could be angry! She let go of my hand and looked down. "I... I know!" she said. "What?" I asked surprised. "I kind of felt it." she said, not looking at me. "Why?" "Its just that, you started spending so much time with Mike that I started to get jealous, I tried to get between you and Mike to make you notice me!" I looked at her, not knowing what to do or say. I was surprised, I mean I wasn't expecting this! "Bri, I don't know what to say." I said stupidly. "I know that it's my fault, and if you and Mike are angry I'm really sorry. I just wanted my friend back!" she sad sadly. I hugged her, I felt guilty. I was guilty in a way. "Bri, I'm sorry, I should have been more careful. Next time please do talk to me!" "Brad, I'm really sorry. I really am!" she said hugging me back. "Bri, you know that I couldn't ever stay away from you. I got carried away with this Mike thing!" "I should have trusted you! I was stupid!" she said letting go" Are you and Mike ok?" I didn't answer. "Shit! I'm sorry Brad!" she said sitting on my bed. I sat next to her. "We're not exactly mad, its kind of weird actually!" I said smiling. "Are you going to be ok?" she asked, hopefully. "I'm sure we will!" I said, but deep down inside I wasn't so sure. "But tell me, how are things with Jared?" .. Mike didn't call that night. The next day me and Bri went to the mall and spent the day. I decided to dedicate that day to her. We decided to invite Amanda, Bri's friend. They wanted to see every damn clothes store in the mall. I wasn't complaining, it gave me time to think about Mike. Mike hadn't called. That meant he was mad. I had walked away from him. I was so mad. Why couldn't he understand my point of view? It wasn't the damn game. It was HIM, it was the time that he was spending with me, or should I say the time that he wasn't spending with me! I wasn't going to give in and call him, he was the guilty one. I was so angry with him. I wanted to strangle him and at the same time hold him and just kiss him. URG...this love thing is so weird. So, so, so, weird. One day we're up there in the sky happily talking with the birds, then out of the blue we end up down here on earth talking to no one! My thoughts were interrupted by Bri's call. "Does this look good on me?" she asked wearing a mini skirt with a top. "Jared will love it!" I said rolling my eyes. "What about me?" Amanda asked. Amanda was hot. Not the blond slut kind of hot. But the girl next door kind of hot. She had the most perfect face that I had ever seen. Her body was something a lot of girls would kill for, and the pants and top that she was wearing only made things better "I'm speechless!" I said looking her up and down. "Thanks!" She said smiling at me. Bri laughed and walked towards her dressing room. Amanda walked towards me and sat next to me. "So Brad, how come you're single?" she asked smiling. "I guess I haven't found the right person!" I said smiling back. "Oh really?" she said leaning closer. "What? To many to choose from?" I laughed. "I wish!" "Oh, you have something in your hair!" she said, picking something out of it. She was real close to me. I could see her perfect eyes looking straight at me. She leaned into me and... "What about this one?" Bri asked looking at herself on the mirror. I leaned back and reality hit me. I was about to cheat on Mike. "It's great!" I said getting up. "I need to go to the bathroom!" "Are you ok?" Bri asked concerned. I didn't answer. I just walked to the nearest bathroom. ... I splashed water on my face then looked at myself on the mirror. I went into the nearest stall and sat on the toilet. Thankfully they were somewhat clean! I started to think about what I had just done when I heard someone enter. "Dude, that girl is something else!" I heard a voice say. "Yeah, she is something alright!" I heard a secound voice say. I recognized that voice, it was Mike! He was here! And by the looks of it, he wasn't alone! "And that Michelle! I think I'm gonna get lucky!" the first voice. Then I heard Mike laugh and a zipper being pulled down. "What are you gonna do about her?" the voice asked. "I don't know...." Mike said. I could hear the uncertainty in his voice. "Dude, you've to go with the flow! I mean you've been single for what? Ages? You gotta laid!" "I don't know...." "Are you seeing someone now?" Mike didn't answered immediatly, I tensed, I was almost glued to the stall door. "No, I guess I'm not seeing anyone right now!" I heard the zipper being pulled back up. "Then go for it!" the voice said. "I mean, she's already sat in your lap, and I saw where your hand was!" I was mad, totally furious. I took a deep breath and opened the stall door. Both of them looked at me and Mike was surprised. "Hi there!" I said in my most polite voice. "Whats up?" "Nothing man...." the voice said, I recognized the guy, it was Jeff Simmons. "What are you doing here?" I asked washing my hands. "We're trying to score some nookie!" Jeff said. Mike was still speachless. "Hey, you heard the conversation?" "Yeah, it's not like you were trying to hide it!" I said looking straight at Mike. He had the grace to look at the ground. "So, what do you think? You think that Mike should go for it?" Jeff asked. I tried to contain my anger and sadness. I looked straight at Mike who looked like somone was ripping his arm off. "Yeah, I mean it's obvious that you aren't attached to anyone and you've already started to enjoy it!" "See, I told ya!" Jeff said to Mike happily. "Well, see you at school!" I said walking away. I was so mad, but at the same time I just wanted to cry. I entered the store to find Bri alone sitting on a small sofa reading a magazine. She looked over and immediately caught onto my mood. "What's wrong?" "Nothing...where's Amanda?" "She said she wasn't feeling to well, went home!" she said looking at me strangly. "Was she mad at me?" I asked worried. I had the chance to cheat on Mike and I had restrained myself, he had been in the same situation, and by the looks of it, had already grabbed at the chance. "I don't know. She said that she remembered something that she needed to do." I noticed that she was getting a little sad. This was her day, it was supposed to be an US day, and I wasn't going to let Mike ruin it! ... I had forgotten how much fun it was to see a movie with Bri. The movie was boring but we were cosy with our feet resting on the front seats and happily eating popcorn, ocasionally throwing one at someone that was asking for it. Somewhat in the middle of the movie Bri wishpered for me to look at osme group that was on the back of the teather. I looked around to see a group of people very well known on school sitting there. There were couples making out not bothering with the movie or the others, I noticed Jeff making out with some brunette and right next to him was Mike with some blonde on top of him eating his neck. I turned around quickly and focoused on the popcorn trying to hold the tears. "Someone is scoring huh?" she asked smiling. I looked at her and almost asked if she had seen Mike, it was obvious that she hadn't. I smiled back and tried to follow the rest of the movie, and trying to not listen to the sucking noises. When the lights come back up I didn't get up. Bri looked at me strangely. "Are you planning on sleeping there?" "Let' wait for everyone to get out...to avoid the crowd!" I said. "Brad, there are like 15 people here! Come on, wanna go to a store before we leave!" she said lifting me up. I tried to avoid it, but it happened anyway. Bri saw the crowd and waved at them. Bri knew most of them since Jared had already introduced her to his mates. They saw her and motioned for her to approach. "Bri, hum, I have to go the bathroom." I said, not able to think up a better excuse. "Right, you went before we got here. Look, Mike's there!" she said, dragging me with her. I groaned and thought "what else could happen!" "Hey Bri, what are you doing here?" Jeff asked putting his arm around the brunnete's shoulders. "Just spending some time with my buddy here!" she said smiling. There were 3 couples right in front of me. I tried to focous on Jeff and his girl, but my eyes kept wandering to the blonde's lips and how they were kissing Mike's neck. I so wanted to get out of there. "Oh, we meet again!" Jeff said with a stupid smile. I don't know why but I wanted to kill him, him and that vampire blonde. "Yeah." I said, finding a sudden interest in the poster behind him. Bri must've sensed my discomfort and said that she needed to do some things before we went home and that she was in a hurry. We left them and when they were far behind us she turned to me. "Brad, I'm soooooooooo sorry, I didn't notice that Mike was, well, with someone!" she said. "It's ok." I said looking at the ground. "I swear that if I knew that I wouldn't have drug you over there!" she said, then grabbed my hand. "Do you wanna go home?" "No, this is our day, Mike's not gonna ruin it!" I said smiling. She smiled back and hugged me. ... "I'm sorry about you know what!" Bri said sadly. "Don't worry about it. If Mike prefers her, I just have to live with it." I said trying to smile. She looked at me and didn't smile. "You can tell it's hurting you.... that's normal!" "I know....don't worry...I'll be ok. I'll see you tomorrow!" I said and hugged her. "Just remember that I'm still here!" she said softly. "I know!" I said. After Bri left I looked for my mom only to find that she went to a party with John. I groaned and went to take a shower. Reflection time was waiting for me. I don't like really hot showers. Cold ones are for me. I sighed when the water hit my neck. I couldn't stop thinking about Mike. I had been the one that had left that day, but he had been the one that had stopped caring! We did break up, words weren't needed. If he was so happy with another person then so be it. I would have to move on. Easy to say, hard to do. The image of the vampire girl on Mike's neck was burned in my head and I could still feel my heartache. I tried to hold the tears back, but I couldn't. I sat in the shower with the water still falling and cried until I didn't have any more tears. I don't know how much time I spent in the shower. I dried off and stared at the mirror. I saw a totally normal guy. It was understandable why Mike was tired of me! I looked at the shaving razor and remembered what I had felt when it seemed to be my only solution. I wasn't going to fall into that state again. I knew how it was to be in the end of a tunnel and only see one way out. I didn't want to go back there, no matter what. I grabbed the razor and tossed it in the garbage can. I walked to my room and lay on my bed. I still had some homework to do but didn't have the patience to do it. I just crawled under the blankets and felt asleep. ... "Hi there!" I heard someone say. I looked up to find Jared smiling. "Mind if I sit with you?" I decided to come early and wait next to the classroom door. I didn't wanted Bri asking me a bunch of questions about Mike and how we were. "Sure." I said not really caring. "So, Bri told me you had a great day yesterday!" he said still with the smile on his face. "Yeah, it was cool, been a long time since we managed to have some time to ourselves!" "Thanks. She seems so much happier now!" "Yeah, we are!" I lied. Someone called Jared and he said goodbye and walked away. I was alone again, sitting on the floor. "Finaly! " I heard Kevin say. "I'm tired of looking for you!" "I'm here!" "Yeah, I can see that. So whats up?" "Nothing!" I lied again. "Yeah... and pigs fly!" he said sitting next to me. "Everything is fine!" I said trying to smile. "Do you remember when you broke up with Pete?" Kevin asked seriously. "Well, I had to spend half and hour asking you what was up and you said that everything was ok, but I managed to get you to tell me!" "And?" "Do you wanna waste another half an hour?" he asked mocking me. I groaned. I looked at the ground and told him. "I never liked him!" he said angrily. I didn't answer. "What are you gonna do?" "I don't know." "You do know that today we are gonna work in pairs?" "And?" "You do remember that you and Mike stayed together last time and probably will be again." Shit. I'd forgotten that, I was about to leave when I saw the teacher comming toward the door. I cursed life under my breath and got up. "We're going to finish the work we started last week. Please join in pairs and leave the paper on my desk when the bell rings." the teacher said. I looked at Bri not knowing what to do. She looked back mouthing good luck. I sighed and saw Mike sit in front of me. "So, lets finish this!" I said looking at the desk. "Brad..." "I'll just write the rest of it and then you'll sign it!" I said interrupting him. "This is our work!" he said sotly. "No, there isn't anything that is ours!" I said looking straight at him. He looked down and didn't say a thing. I turned to the paper again and continued working. I resisted the urge to look at him, but I knew that if I did that I would either be mad at myself or get even sadder. "It is supposed to be a work in pairs!" the teacher said comming out of nowhere. "Sorry!" I said embarresed I looked at Mike. He was playing with his pencil. "So, do you wanna write the rest?" "Whatever." he said, shrugging his shoulders. I sighed and gave him the paper. I looked at him. I still feel that tingle in my stomach but at the same time I felt angry and couldn't help wanting to smack him. "Brad, I'm sorry!" he said out of the blue. "Not here Mike! "I wispered. "I don't care. I have to talk to you!" he said a little bit to loudly. "Not here!" I said a little louder "Promise me then that you'll listen to me!" he said pleadingly. "Ok, ok, but please not here!" I said. He smiled and went back to the paper. After that damn class we had a free hour. Mike looked at me and wispered for me to go to the place behind the library. I sighed and went along. Luckily, no one was there. "So... speak!" I said sitting on an old bench. "Brad I'm sorry." he started. "I shouldn't have been such a total prick!" "And?" I asked expecting more. "I just... I just... I can't be gay. I mean I am, I just can't let people know that, and if I stop dating girls what will people think?" he asked. "Yeah....other people are more important than me...I understand that!" I said looking straight at him. "Don't be like that! I want to be with you, I just can't let everything go..." "Look, Mike, I loved you, I still do and probably will for a long time, but I am not going to be in a relationship where I have to share!" I said getting up. "I didn't even kiss that damn girl, I tried to but I couldn't stop thinking about you!" he said a tear running down his face. "Well, what do you want me to do? Be your little dog? Do you want me to be avaiable when your girlfriend is tired? I don't think so!" "It's not like that. I..." he said trying to say something. "Mike, I don't know what you want, I really don't." I said seriously. "In a relationship two is good, three is to many!" "It's not like that, I just don't want to loose everything, I've worked to hard for it!" he said looking straight at me. "Then so be it, you can have all that, the girl, the friends, and the popularity. I'll just leave and I promise that I won't bother you. I won't even talk to you, so that you can be happy." I said grabbing my backpack. "Brad, can't we at least be friends?" he asked almost begging. "For what? So that I can suffer everytime that I talk to you? So that I have to see you with a girl and pretend that it doesn't bother me? No. If I really have to I'll talk to you, but the rest of the time I'll just stay in my own little world!" I said standing up. He didn't answer, he sat on the bench and just looking at the ground. "I'll see ya around!" I said walking away. I didn't even look back, I tried to compose myself and be strong, but I couldn't. I skipped the rest of the day's classes and went home. Alone, but at least with some pride. TBC.... Here it is...I just love cliffhangers:P....keep on mailing to pookie_story@hotmail.com. Be good.