Date: Sun, 11 May 2003 09:08:15 +0000 From: Mike M Subject: Revelation Series: Revelation 3 Usual disclaimer apply! Ok, for those of you who remember me, which I doubt any of you do, don't start throwing rocks at me for taking so long to finish this one. I know I said that this chapter would be posted on the Friday or Saturday two weeks ago. Sorry:( The last two week have been hell for me and I haven't been able to write. So please forgive me?! Here are some words of wisdom: Never believe me when I say a chapter would be posted at a certain date; it's probably not going to happen! However, I would like to thank ALL of those who supported me in this story - you know who you are! THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!! And a big thanks to J.B. for helping me with this chapter! Vielen Dank sehr viel! Sie sind das beste! Did I get that right? Now, without further ado, here it is.... Please send any comments, criticisms, etc. to: safplover@hotmail.com I was walking down the road on a dark and lonely night. The stars were concealed behind the clouds and the light of the moon obscured. The winds were fierce and the temperature was freezing. I've been walking for over an hour, not really heading to a particular destination. Suddenly, I heard footsteps behind the dense trees to my side. Still I went on. Then, a paper ball of fire was thrown at me, and then another, then another. Really frightened, I start to head back to my house, walking as fast as I could, almost as if I were running. A figure emerged from the trees blocking my way. I could tell it was a male figure even with his heavy black coat and a hat that covered his head. I stood there, petrified, while he moved a little closer. "We don't want no fags 'round here," he stated calmly. I stood still, unable to move. "It's time for you to go," said he in the most eerie manner. Then he began to pull his hand out of the pocket of his coat. Then something shiny and black slowly emerged from the pocket. At first I didn't know what it was, but soon realized with horror. "You need to die. You don't belong," he judged as he pointed the gun towards me. Each second he held the aim felt like a lifetime of agony. Finally, he secured his finger on the trigger and then I heard the click and explosion at the same time.... I woke up in bed, sweating and panting. I didn't know where I was at first, but then everything began to focus. After a few minutes, I calmed down a bit, but did not recover from the nightmare. What could the dream have been telling me? Was it merely a result of my distress from the previous day? I didn't want to ponder these questions so I went downstairs to get a glass of water. Then, I went back to sleep since it was only 2:00am. My alarm went off at 7:00pm. As I opened my eyes, I felt very tired because I'd been waking up during the rest of the five hours. I also felt sad and scared because I had to go to school and endure another day of it. 'Oh well' I said to myself. 'Whatever happens, happens.' "Good morning, Mike!" said my mother cheerfully as she came into the kitchen while I was eating my cereal. She has always been a morning person. "Mornin', mom," I said uninterested, but she didn't even notice. "I'm getting off work early today. Do you want me to cook anything special?" "Whatever sounds good to you," I replied, obviously not caring what she cooks tonight. "Hmmm! How about pot roast and mashed potatoes? Sound good?" "Sounds good!" I tried to sound as enthusiastic as I could. "We've never had a dinner together as a family in a long time," she observed, mostly talking to herself. For the first time in several years, I walked to school all by myself, without Spencer by my side. But somehow, I didn't feel as saddened by this because it was quite a sunny, beautiful morning. The snow shone in a blinding white as the sunlight reflected off of the crystalline flakes. The air felt cool as it caressed my face at every stride I took. The sky was clear and blue, unusual for a winter's day. I absorbed everything and it filled me with a calming sensation. For that moment in time, I forgot about my strife. As I neared the school, I could see that there were already a lot of students there. I got stares and whispers here and there, but nothing drastic - not yet at least. I walked through the halls, head high, chest high, but inside, I felt like I was going to collapse of nervousness and fright. I was late for my first class. Naturally, as I came in, everybody in the room stared me down, not just because most of them knew I was gay, but also because I was late. My first three classes I had with Spencer, so as I came in I saw him, next to my seat, look at me but turned back to his work. Why were we assigned to sit next to each other?!?! I sat down. I could feel the tension between us, but neither of us looked or said a word to each other the whole time. This went on for all of the classes I had with him, but at least I only had one other class where I sat next to him. At lunch, I was sitting all alone eating at a table. Then someone threw a pencil at me, and then several others threw little rocks. My other friends came to my table. It didn't seem like they knew anything yet because they their usual selves around me. "Hey, what was up with Spencer yesterday? When he came to sit with us at lunch he was all quiet and seemed like he was pissed at something," said Jennifer, one of our friends. She's very hot, at least that's what the straight guys say. "Yeah, and then when we asked him where you were, he got all tense and made this weird face and he didn't say anything," added Brian. Brian's a cool guy; he's nice and funny. They were all looking at me, waiting for an explanation. I could tell that they could see my face being deprived of color and the look of happiness because they suddenly looked concerned. Should I tell them the truth? As I was pondering this, they waited for an explanation. "Things between me and Spencer aren't well right now," was all I said, trying to be simple, but providing them with the slightest, mildest form of the truth. They all looked sad. They know that me and Spencer had become really close. Luckily, they didn't ask why we were in bad terms because they know that when I give short simple answers like that, that means I don't want to talk about it, although I knew that they really wanted to know the details. However, their curiosity would soon be answered, as the guys from the football team walked by and threw a used condom full of cum at me. It spilled on the table and some on my clothes. "Here you go cocksucker, it's warm and fresh. I know you wanna swallow it real bad," one of the guys taunted. The others guys started laughing really hard. The worst thing about it was that Spencer was with them, as he was in the football team. It wasn't just that Spencer was with them, it was also because Spencer was laughing his ass off along with the other guys! I could feel myself burning from humiliation and anger, a dangerous combination. I was breathing hard, all of my anger rising from within. I was about to get up and beat the shit out of the guys because I knew I could do it, or at least I knew I could beat up one or two of them. However, I stopped myself, mustering as much of my self-control as I could. If I would have resorted to violence, I would have proven to me and Them how weak I am. Violence might be an easy way out, but it would inevitably lead to more trouble. Violence is a solution, but it's never the best one. So, I just tried to stay calm. They went away finally. I suddenly remembered that my friends were still sitting across from me. I look at them and their faces showed immense shock and confusion. "What the fuck did just happen?" asked Allan. Sarah suddenly gasped and analyzed, "Is that why you and Spencer aren't talking? You're gay and then he found out!" WOW smarty pants I thought sarcastically to myself. "Yeah, didn't you know about that big commotion yesterday?" I spoke, whispering and looking down. "Oh so that's what that was all about!" I looked up to see how they would react to the discovery of my sexuality. They were all just looking at me. Allan just stood up and walked away. We all looked at him leaving. Then they all looked confused, as if trying to figure out what to do next. I couldn't stand this, not another episode of rejection. Unfortunately, the guys from the football team came back again and walked close to the table once more. "Did you like my hot cum," dared the same guy who threw it at me. I decided to fight back a little. "Yeah, it was great, man. It tasted even better when I figured that you were probably thinking of my hot body while you shot your load. Asshole!!" Then I ran inside the building to the library, leaving my friends behind. I felt bad for leaving them like that, but it seemed like they were going to reject me and I didn't want to experience that again. Plus, I didn't want to risk getting beat up by the football team. But the look on their faces was priceless! The library was surprisingly full, but there was one more unoccupied table left, so I went and sat there. I started doing my homework so I wouldn't have to deal with it later. Then, after ten minutes, a boy came into the library. I've seen him around; he's pretty attractive. Not as much as Spencer, but hot enough for a boner. I continued to do my homework. "Could I sit here?" he asked, startling me as the deafening silence was shattered by his sexy voice. I looked around and noticed that there was one table whose occupants must've left since I was in here, so it was empty. "Sure," I said, unsure of why he wouldn't just sit at the empty table. "Thanks! I'm Chris by the way," he said while extending his hand to me. "I'm Mike. Nice to meet you!" I replied as I shook his hand. He smiled, but there was an uncomfortable silence afterward. So, I went back to my work as he sat down and took out his notebooks. We were silent for about a few minutes. "What math class are you taking?" he, asked shattering the barrier of silence once again. "Um, I'm taking calculus," I replied, wondering why he asked such a question. I didn't have to wait long for an explanation. "Tight! So you've taken geometry before? You're a junior, right?" "Yeah," I answered to both of his questions, but leaving out the fact that I've been advanced to several math classes because I was too smart for the ither ones. "Geez, man! You must be real smart, coz I'm only in geometry, and that's like two math courses behind calculus and I'm a junior like you!" I was silent. I didn't know what to say. "Anyway, can you help me with these vectors? We have a test tomorrow and I don't know any of this shit! If I flunk this test, my dad's gonna take away my car!" "Um, yeah, sure," I replied, unsure of myself. So I proceeded in explaining the concepts of vectors to him and he seemed to get it. Then the bell rang. Before we parted to our separate ways, he stopped me. "Thanks a lot dude! Do you want to hang out sometime?" he asked I was shocked and scared. Didn't he know about me? What if he was just trying to trick me? I decided to ask him. "Aren't you worried what people are gonna think? I mean, you do know about me, right?" "Yeah, but who cares what other people think! Just because you're gay and we're seen hanging out, doesn't mean that were going out and having sex!" "Ok. Then I'd like to hang out with you." "Cool! How 'bout after school today?" "Better not, coz my mom's making this big dinner and she really wants us to be together. You know how mom's are!" "YA!! Ok so just call me or I'll call you or whatever, alright?" "Sure!" Then we exchanged numbers. I wonder what the people who saw that were thinking. But Chris was one of the popular ones like Spencer and everyone knows that Chris fucked a lot of girls, with a new girlfriend every two weeks, so whatever he seemed to be doing with me wouldn't have mattered to the other students because he had a straight license. I'm surprised he was fine with the fact that I was gay, and he even asked me to be friends with him! This is turning out to be a good day after all! The day went on and the classes were finally over. I was walking home feeling uplifted, despite the bad events of the day. I was just happy that I made a new friend. The clouds rolled in gracefully. But their graceful movements were a herald for an unpleasant event: a storm. The winds awoke, beginning to grow cold and beginning to gain speed. The great fervor of the shining sun was now just a hint of light against the dense clouds. The trees became ghostly images as they stood under the growing darkness. However, even all of this could not bring me down from the euphoria I was rarely in. I heard noises in the trees beside me, but I ignored it as much as I could. I remembered the nightmare. Then suddenly, an arm grabbed me and brought me into the trees and in to a secluded area of the park. I was near death from the nervousness and fright I was in! "Relax, it's me! Remember me?" It was the boy who kissed me in the hallways That Day. "Hey," was all I could say above my panting. "I've been wanting to talk to you since you know..." he trailed off and looked down. I was kind of angry at him for being a major part of our outing. Why did he have to be so careless? Why did he let his small head think before his big head? But part of me didn't want to fully blame him. "I wanted to tell you," he continued, "that we will be moving to a different city tomorrow. But that's not what I really wanted to tell you. I wanted to say sorry for what I did." By now he was crying softly. "You don't ha -" "No! I have to do this! I'm so sorry for being so careless and outing us both at school. I didn't know that o was gonna get us in this shit, or else I wouldn't have done it. It seemed like the perfect time to do what I did when I saw you walking in the 'empty' hallway. Obviously not! I'm so sorry, please forgive me! And it kills me that I'll leave you like this and not be able to be here so we could face this together, but my parents have known about me, and were ok with it, for a while now and when they found out about what happened, they immediately looked for a different place where I would be safe. God, I hate to leave you like this to face the future! Please forgive me for everything! This is so fuckin' messed up!" By now, he was crying really hard and yelling. Luckily no one was in the park. "Hey, it's ok, man. Don't beat yourself up about this. There's really nothing to forgive, but if it'll make you feel better to hear me say it, then I forgive you. I have to admit that at first I was a bit angry with you for doing what you did, but then I thought about it and decided that things happen for a reason and that sometimes people can't help what they do. We all get so horny that we can't control what we do sometimes. You don't need to punch yourself about this. Yeah, what you did caused a major turning point in my life, which pointed me to a road that is not easy to travel on. But you know what? No matter what we encounter in that road, we'll learn from it. And that's what'll make us stronger." I was trying to say this in my most soothing voice to try and calm him. It worked, because now his tears stopped flowing from the balls through which he looks. I was glad to see a smile of relief and realization begin to form on his beautiful mouth. "Wow! I never thought of it like that. Thank you for telling me that. It makes me feel better and more, I don't know, inspired? Yeah, that's it, inspired." He was smiling fully now. I reached out and dried the tears on his face with my hands. "Well, I guess this is goodbye then, huh?" I said, sadness in my voice. "Yeah." He replied softly, and then pulled me into a tight hug. "Take care, man. Always remember what I said, alright?" I said. "Ok, I will. And take care also." "By the way, I never did get your name," I informed, slightly embarrassed that all this time I never knew his name. He smiled his cute smile and said, "Mike, just like you. To be more exact, Michael Sanders." Then he walked away, walking towards his destiny. I watched him until he disappeared into the distance. The temperature was now almost freezing and the winds howled mightily. I headed home. After I finished the rest of my homework, I cruised the net for a while and then my mother called me down for The Dinner. I sat at the computer chair for a while before coming down. I was just thinking. I was thinking of the new friendship I had formed today, and the talk I had with Michael. Suddenly, I began to look at this battle in a different light. Amidst all of its darkness and suffering, a flicker of hope and salvation shines with glorious luster. It's there to light the way if I so desired. I felt a surge of renewed energy for this battle. At the dinner table, we were all talking happily like a normal happy family. Then the phone rang and my dad went to get it. After about five minutes, he returned. It was as if color was afraid to dwell in his face, as his face was pale, and he had a look of shock and anger and other emotions, which I could not scrutinize. Mom and I became worried. "I was just on the phone with Spencer's dad. Apparently, they noticed that Spencer has been different since yesterday, so they asked him what was up. He told them that you and him were not friends anymore because he found out you're a fuckin' fairy!" A searing light flashed across my eyes and then darkness.... Well, what do you think? Please send comments, criticisms, opinions, etc. to: safplover@hotmail.com I'll try my best to post more often!