Date: Mon, 4 Sep 2000 13:04:05 -0700 (PDT) From: Bob bonn Subject: Robbie and Phill (12) I know that technically you are not supposed to read this until you are 18, but we all know that doesn't happen. If you are bellow that age then please take the time to mail me, I for one would like to chat with you (I am only 17) but also because I may be able to help if you are in a sticky situation. BIG news STAN is writing again he is a good friend and he wrote Matt and Mike in the young friends. The story is called One Big Happy Family and can be found in the young friends section. DO check that out, it is cool!! I have read all of it so far and it really is worth it! Traditional Hi to all my mates Stan, Andy, Dave, Dug, Ed, Kevin, Kevy, Isaiah, Adam, Matt and last but by NO means least mike. Everyone else as well! Ok major hi to Ed, hey babes! This is 4 u and I am looking forward to Tuesday! Love ya. xx The holidays had finished, and I had had the best time of my life. I had found Robbie and now I lived with him. We had the most perfect holiday together and made some really cool new friends. Perhaps most importantly however, we had the chance at another holiday together. Well not totally a holiday, but we were going back over to play live every night. We had arranged everything and it was all set. The songs had been chosen and we had worked out what we were going to play. I tell you, it wasn't easy because we were there a long time and we wanted to try not to play the same songs too often. I think the maximum we repeated any song was three times and that was only because The Police KICK ASS!! Everyone loves 'Every Breath You Take' and so we had it three times. We even included some unknown music by some American bands that were apparently quiet hot sometime back. I think they were called Boston and STICKS...... or something like that (hehe, payback's a bitch ain't it Stan?) Robbie and I had fallen into bed at ten. To be honest, I was dreading the following day, no dreading doesn't cover it, I was SHITTING myself about it. As far as I know we are the only gay people in school. When I woke up, I seriously felt like skiving and not going in, my legs were shaking. Robbie looked over at me and I could feel the fear running off him. Also the look in his eye, but also there was a look of determination. We kissed, showered and changed. This was the final year of school and our A level year. Some people say that these are the hardest exams you will ever have to take so we would have to work this year. When we left the house, my mum gave me and Robbie a kiss on the cheek and she almost started crying, saying that this would be the first thing she couldn't do for me and couldn't protect me from. We piled into the car and I drove us slowly to the school. When we got there, I held out my hand to Robbie and he took it as we put our bags over our shoulders. I don't know if you know how school in England works, but we are all given our own room and the whole school is divided into 'houses' or 'sets' if you like. We walked into the hall together and past a couple of people and then up to our housemaster's room, where we signed in. "Good morning lads," his cheery voice screeched at us. "Morning" Robbie said. If he noticed anything he said nothing. "Here are your keys," he said, handing us a set of keys each. "You are up here this year and are just in the side there," he said, pointing. I heaved a sigh of relief. We had been given the corridor. That means that there are two rooms at the end of a passage. You could lock your own room but also the door at the front of the corridor. "So we are locking the end door?" I asked. "You bet," he said. When we had stowed our things we headed downstairs to meet up with Dan and Kaz down in the coffee bar. "Hey guys!" Kaz said as she saw us. "Hey" I said. "How are you?" Robbie asked. "Fine, you two are already talk of the school, you know that?" "How come?" "Well, from what I can gather, you walked in through the main doors holding hands and you walked past Trish Gordon. BIG mistake!" she said emphasising the big. "Erm, why?" "Because she has the biggest mouth in town." As Kaz finished, two guys came walking up behind us and one put his hand down on Robbie's shoulder. "Hey BOYS" he spat out and squeezed Robbie's shoulder until I saw him wince with pain. That's when I stood up and turned to face Stew and Pat. "Do you wanna get off him?" I said. "Ah look, Stew, he is protecting his fag assed boyfriend," Pat mocked. "Ahhh, sweet" Stew played along. Then, Pat put his face inches away from mine and shouted at me "AND WHAT YA GONNA DO ABOUT IT?" "Do I need to do anything?" "YES" Ok, so he asked for it! I quickly raised my knee and pushed his head down to meet it. I heard the crack as his nose came into contact with my hard knee. As I pushed him back, Stew lunged at me and I simply dogged and he flew across the floor and landed on his ass. Robbie jumped up and embraced me in a warm hug. "Thanks" "Anytime for you" I said. We looked at Dan and Kaz, and with that, we all got up and moved to the exit. However four guys stood in the way. "Going somewhere?" one asked. "Yea, out," Dan said, as he looked them over. By now Pat and Stew had regained there senses and before Kaz had time to shout a warning one took Robbie and one took me, I wasn't sure which one took who until Robbie was turned to face me. "That was a real stupid thing you just did," Stew whispered in my ear. "Fuck off" I said back to him and as I finished, his fist came into contact with my stomach. "AGHH" I cried out. If nothing else, this guy had a hard punch. "Why are you doing this?" Robbie asked barely above a whisper. "Why do you think, you fucking queer." "What have we ever done to you?" "You breath the same air as us, that's enough." The next thirty seconds were the worst of my life as I watched Pat knee Robbie in the ass and then as he fell down to his knees, punch him square in the jaw. Then he cracked his head against his knee. As he pulled his hair enough to make him lift his head, he thumped down on him again. Robbie looked over at me, blood pouring from the side if his face where Pats knee had come into contact with him and mouthed "I love you" to me. I was so cut up inside by this time that I felt completely out of it. And then, it started on me, the pain in my side and then on my arms, then my back and a thump in my head as everything went black and I couldn't see anything. My eyes opened what I would guess to be a couple of minutes later and I saw Robbie on the floor in front of me, blood dripping from him. I looked around to see that there was a concerned circle around as. The 'Jocks' had gone. I crawled over to Robbie and he met me in the middle. As we pulled each other close we both flinched from the pain. Kaz came in from no where with tissues and water and brushed the water from our grazes. In a really, really weird way, I felt so happy as she cleaned both of our faces with the one bit of tissue and our blood mixed on the tissue. "Kkkaazzz" I forced out. "Yea baby?" "Don't throw it away" "What?" I put my hand out and looked at the tissue in her hand. "You want this???" she asked obviously confused. I nodded and she placed it in my hand. I looked Robbie over and saw that his gorgeous face was now a complete mess. "Kaz, take us away from here," Robbie forced out. We helped each other to our feet and the crowd of people that were watching all looked at us as I took up Robbie's hand and we limped away and stopped only at the door where Dan was. "Guys," he started. "Just fuck off, Dan!" Robbie said and I nodded and we started walking again. Kaz gave Dan the most evil look in the world and walked straight past him and helped us both out the doors and towards the car park. As we fell into the back seat, I put my arm about Robbie and Kaz got into the driving seat and reversed out and onto the drive just as Dan ran up behind us. "Hey guys!" he shouted out. But Kaz just floored the accelerator and left him in a cloud of dust. When we arrived home, I thank god that both the mums were out. As we sat down on the chairs in the kitchen, Kaz came over with a bottle of TCP. "This is gonna hurt like shit, guys, but it will kill any germs," she said as she put some on some kitchen roll and applied it to our grazes and cuts. "Why, Kaz, why??" I asked. "I don't know, maybe they think that by beating up a couple of gay guys, it makes them hard, maybe they get a kick out of it, there are a lot of sick people out there." "I meant Dan," I said. Her face changed and she became tight-lipped and said nothing. "Come on you two, off to bed," she said, playing mother. I must say that I did agree with her. I felt so tired and it would be the best place for Robbie and I to talk. Robbie reached out and we took the others hand and walked upstairs to our room. Kaz shouted up the stairs, "Right I am off now, I am borrowing your car Phill. Don't worry about a thing," and the door shut before I had the chance to even reply. "Robbie, why us? What did we ever do? Nothing, that's what! Fucking Jack shit was what we did," I said, as a tear ran down my cheek. Robbie pressed his hand to my cheek and then used his thumb to wipe away the tear. "It will get better, I promise you," he said, as we both fell into the bed. God I ached, the punches were hard and hurt like sod. As I held Robbie's face in my hands, I looked him over to see the bruise that had formed on his right cheek. He pulled me tight to his body, both of us wincing at the dull ache that came from pressure being applied to our bruises. Finally, the pain caught up and we both fell into wonderland. As I came to, I saw my mum and Jude looking down on the both of us with Kaz in the background. "Afternoon," I grunted, as I felt the pain rush through me again. This was the first time that I think I really understood the immense pain Robbie must have gone through when his dad beat him up. I mean, here I am with a few punches thrown at me and there he was with about a hundred all over him. But still it hurt. "You have got yourselves in a fine mess. I suppose you had better tell us about it," Jude said. So, I went through it all for them. How I didn't like to see Robbie being hurt, so I lashed out and got myself and Robbie in shit, basically. As I finished my tale, Robbie came to and threw out his arms and put them about my chest and pulled me back to him. I don't think, unless you have experienced it for yourself, that words can describe the immense love you can feel for another when they do something so simple but show that they love you in return. A simple thing like being needed by his side or a hug when I need it gives a guy a great feeling. "I can't see why this world is so full of hate. Look at you two, you are doing nothing to nobody and it pisses me off that you should have to live with it," Kaz said just above a whisper. Mum and Jude exited from the room and said nothing. I was surprised, they simply asked what happened and left. Kaz disappeared after them, sensing that this was Robbie's and my time. We didn't say anything, just looking into one another eyes and feeling the other's love. I don't know why, but we needed it. After what seemed like five minutes, there was a little cough and I rolled over and Robbie moved forward so that he could still hug me. I looked up into the eyes of Dan. "What do you want?" I asked. "I I came to say that I am sorry. I don't really know what I have done wrong, but I am sorry for it." "You don't know what you did?" Robbie asked. "Erm, no" he replied. "Do we have to spell it out to you?" He didn't reply but looked totally lost. "YOU, you just stood there and watched those bastards hit us and you did jack shit. Hell, you didn't even do the pussy thing and get a teacher to stop them. You watched as they hit us. You voiced no opinion, no nothing. Not a "Leave them alone", nothing. You just stood there and watched. NO friend would do that. Why Dan? You are supposed to be our friend and you did nothing, absolutely nothing. Do you know what made it worse? We know you are not the fighting kind, and we are not either, but you didn't even say stop. Nothing. Get it?" He didn't say anything just took the barrage of words from Robbie and then he walked out of the door before I would guess he started crying. "Did I go over the top?" Robbie asked. "No, what you said was fair. Come on," I said, getting out of bed and pulling Robbie towards the shower. When the water was right, we both got in and it was the first time I got to look at how bad it was. He looked really good, relative to when his dad did him over. I mean, his face looked not quiet as good, and he would have a couple of scabs for a bit and a black eye. But overall, he looked not too bad. As we washed and soaped each other, Robbie spoke. "Can I ask you a question?" I laughed "Sure you can, you can do anything, you should know that!!" "Why did you want to keep that tissue Kaz used to wipe our faces?" "Because." "Because?" "It shows everything that we stand for. You bled for me and I bled for you. We can get through anything as long as we are together. See?" "I had never thought of it like that." "And another thing, you were getting hit from all sides and yet you looked at me and told me that you loved me. I really don't know how to say what I feel about that. Ya know?" "Yes, I know what you mean, but I am like you. Words really cannot cover it. You make me feel so special, so important." As we got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around the two of us, there was a knock at the door and mum and Jude came in. "Hi boys, how are you feeling?" "We are fine, thanks. It just hurt at first, but I feel not too bad now," Robbie said. "Yea, me too." "What shall we do about this situation? I am not prepared to let you both go in and get beaten up everyday." "We can handle it, give us tomorrow and if things don't get any better, we will talk about it again. Ok?" "Ok if you say so," Jude said. "BUT! If this continues, we will do something," she warned. Mum nodded and they left again. We sat down on what I guess the Americans would call 'a love seat'. I would call it a big chair for two people. But hey, I am English! It was purchased at the same time as the bed and it was really cool, because it meant that the two of us could sit together. As we hugged up to the other, the warmth really was cool. "So, Robbie, what about this wedding?" "I am glad you said that," as he gave me a squeeze. "Should we talk to the mums about it?" "Sure we should. But you know that you can't have a proper wedding, because it's illegal. Right?" "Yea, I know, but you can have a service that blesses the relationship and we can treat it as the same thing." "Cool. But, I think that we have to wait until we are both eighteen." "Well, I am not waiting a second longer than I need to! We could make it for your birthday." "That would be cool. That's what, six months?" "About that." "Ok major subject change, what are we gonna do about Dan?" "I think we should give it a bit of time." I reached over and flicked on a CD that mum had bought us. It was Tom Jones 'Reload' now mum doesn't know this, but neither Robbie nor I really like Tom Jones, but the point was that mum had bought it for US. There were two songs that we did like. 'She Drives Me Crazy' and 'Some Times We Cry'. Of course, the words for the first song are altered to he but hey, in any song like that they change! About half way through, I saw someone walk past the door and then they looked in and picked up the courage to walk in. It was Dan. "Ggguys" We both just looked at him and he continued. "Guys I am sooo, sooo sorry, I really I am. I feel the lowest of all low things and I am so sorry. I wish I could tell you why I did nothing, I really wish I could. But I don't know myself. You guys are my best friends and sure, I am not all that keen on two guys being together, but that wasn't the reason. I just really don't know why I did nothing. Maybe it's because I am the world's largest coward, maybe I am just a low person. I really don't know. But I do know that I am sooo sorry, the last thing I want is for you to hate me. But I really don't want you to stand on your own anymore, and I will be there with you from now on, I promise." "Come here," I said and he did. Robbie and I stood up at the same time, well we had to!! We only had one towel, so we had to!! We put our arms out and gave him a hug. "Dan, we aren't going to lie, the fact that you did nothing hurt and it may take a while for things to get back to normal. But we have a start and that is better than nothing." "Cool" "Where is Kaz?" "Downstairs." "Ok, do you wanna get her and we can practice?" "Sure, ok." So while Dan was gone, we got dressed and headed off over to the recording studio. "Guys before we start, Kaz has had an idea," Dan said. "Why don't we see if we can get a gig at school? We would offer to play free and the people would just have to pay for any drinks. Then you guys could use the time to put your case forward, if you see what I mean." "That's a cool idea," Robbie said enthusiastically. "Yea, that would be good because it would mean that we could practice some of the songs that we are going to use," I said. "Right, well, it's Monday now, let's see if we can get it for Friday evening. It shouldn't be too hard," Dan said. "Cool, I will go and see the head tomorrow," Kaz said. "Yea, it's probably best if you go!!" "Here goes, after three, let's have 'Wonderwall'" " ONE, TWO, THREE" And everyone clicked straight into 'Wonderwall', by Oasis. When I woke again the next day, I felt great! We had done the hard part, everyone knew, now we just had to live with it. We did nothing different from yesterday, we got ready and then drove to school and once again, walked in hand in hand. Sure Robbie had a black eye and I had a nice bruise on my cheek, but to hell with it. When we walked in, a lot of faces turned our way and I could feel my cheeks go red and I am sure I wasn't the only one!! Robbie squeezed my hand tight and we carried on walking. "Phill," someone shouted. I looked around to see one of my friends, a guy called Tom, looking towards us. "Yea," I said. He didn't say anything, just gave me the thumbs up and I nodded and carried on walking. That was about the level of commitment you get from people, but when they do something like that, it is a good thing because it means they are committed. We walked upstairs and signed in, then went to our rooms. Of course, when we got to the door that we had locked at the beginning of the corridor, there were things stuck all over the door. Crude pictures of two guys have anal sex and queer bent bastard and things like that. "What a welcome present!" Robbie said and giggled. Ok, so I guess it is much better to see the funny side than the crap side. I was about to pull them down when Robbie put his hand on mine and said, "Leave them, if people want to put them there, then they will, so you may as well just leave it and pretend that it doesn't bother you." I must confess that the logic of it made sense. So, we went in and picked up a few bits of paper that had been placed under the door. I looked through them. Someone had posted our timetables for us. Other things included more crap that I just put in a drawer. There was one or two bits that just had 'Good luck' written on them and others that simply said 'Its not just you'. I got kinda engrossed in what I was looking at with Robbie looking over my shoulder that we didn't hear the house master come in. "Boys," he said and we jumped out of our skin. "Whoo. Don't DO that!" I said. "Sorry, I just wanted to check that you are both ok. I heard about yesterday and wanted to make sure that you were both ok." "Sure, we are ok. I guess you have seen our door?" "Yes. To be honest, I don't know what to do because if they want to do this I don't see how I can stop it." "That's ok, Robbie said the same. We are just going to leave it. But I sure hope that you don't show prospective parents around here." "Ok, thank you for your understanding." "Sir, I am not going to pretend that I am going to stand for what happened yesterday, and so I hope you remember that anything that happens to those people is because of what they have done to us. And things such as the stuff that is stuck on our door is not our problem. If you don't like it there, please feel free to remove it. We wont." "Ok." I think he was a bit taken aback at the way we spoke to him, but I wanted things to be clear. As we walked off to first lesson, which was a double lesson together, because like I said before, we do one subject together and two different. Whilst walking the corridor, we got smiles, sniggers and insults. "Queers" we had and "Homo's". We bumped into Kaz on the way and she said that she had seen the head already and he agreed to let us use the hall on Friday night. She had a free now and so she walked around to the sixth form room to use the photocopier. She printed off a load of posters to advertise it. The big emphasis was that it was free. The reason for this is so that more people would turn up and therefore we would be able to talk to more. We sat down in our class together and of course the insults still came. Eventually, the teacher, Mr Stringer, gave up on the evil stares he was giving people and really let rip. "STOP IT NOW! YOU WILL BE QUIET IN MY CLASS. AS FOR ALL THE INSULTS, THEY CAN STOP NOW!! THERE IS NO REASON FOR THEM!!" he shouted, and I am sure that half the school must have heard him. The class finished smoothly until the end when we all filled out and someone said, "Queer lover" just loud enough for him to hear. "Right, Robin get here now!" he shouted at the boy. The rest of us continued to leave and when we had he shut the door. Mr Stringer "Now Robin, would you like to repeat to me what you had just said, please?" "It was a mistake." "You're DAMN right it was a mistake," I shouted about an inch from the kid's face. He just stood there looking blank. "What are you gonna do about it?" "I will stop," he said. "WRONG. You are going to litter pick for three-quarters of your lunch time everyday until I say stop. I will say stop when I am sure that you have stopped picking on Robbie and Phill. You can meet me at the staff room at one, please. NOW GO," I shouted. "Why are you defending them?" the ignorant kid asked me. "WHAT????" I shouted. "Nothing, sir" he said and left. "I cannot believe it, I really can't. Even at the age of about seventeen, they are all so prejudice. Heaven only knows what they would do to me if they found out." I thought to myself. "I have decided that using my senior roll as a teacher, I am going to help Robbie and Phill as much as I can. What they did took balls and they have done something I wish I could, so I will try and help them". Phill Well Robbie headed off for a free whilst I went and had my third lesson of the day. As I consulted my timetable, Tom the guy from earlier came up and said that the class was this way. He was in my class so I just followed him and talked a little. "You know that you are a celeb now, don't you?" he asked. I told him that no, I didn't know! "Well you are," he continued. "How come everyone seems hell bent on taking the piss? Have you seen our door?" "Yes, I walked past this morning and the only reason that people are doing it is because they think it makes them hard. They don't want to associate themselves with gay people because they are scared of you, so they do the opposite, they try to convince themselves that they are big and that is there way of doing it" "Well, you say that, but they have done that very well. Robbie's covered in bruises and so am I!" "Yes, but believe me when I say that I think you are winning.... A lot of the jocks girlfriends are beginning to reject them because of what they are doing and you can bet your life that they wont like that." As he finished, we walked into class and sat down together and a couple of girls came up to me, Tracy and Bev I think. "Hi Phill" Tracy said. "Erm, Hi" I said. "We just wanted to say that we think it's sweet, you and Robbie, that is." "Thanks," I said as the teacher walked in and they re-seated themselves. Finally, the end of the day ticked around and I met Robbie waiting by my car. He didn't look all that good. "Ok, tell me what hap.... BASTARDS," I said, as I looked at my car to see that it was covered with 'silly string'. "Come on," I said, and he got in the passenger seat. I drove around to the local garage and went in and put my car through the wash. It came out good as new, thank goodness. I would seriously have freaked, otherwise. When the car came out, I went back inside to the check out and bought some oil and then I drove to the chemist and picked up some Laxative. "You are an evil boy," Robbie said, as he put his arms around my shoulders and kissed me. "I know but they deserve it!!" I said laughing. Robbie and I spent the evening doing some remaining homework and then we worked together on what songs we were going to play. "PHILL," mum shouted up the stairs. "YES," I shouted back. There is some guy called Darren on the phone. "Darren?" I said looking over at Robbie and then picked up the phone that was in our room. "Hello?" "Hi there, this is Darren Hayes," the guy said with a smooth Aussie accent. The name rang a bell but I couldn't place it. I covered the mouthpiece and looked at Robbie and repeated the name. "Rings a bell but can't place it," and I nodded. "Hi, I hope this doesn't sound rude. I know the name, but can't place it." "Would it help if I said that I work with Daniel Jones?" "Daniel Jones?" I asked. Robbie giggled and said, "Someone is winding you up." I looked at him with a questioning face. "Savage Garden," he said. "Ok, so who is this? Nice joke you had me with the accent" I said. "I know this may come as a surprise to you, but I am the guy I say I am." "Ok then, if you say so, what can I do for ya?" I said, still not believing him. "Well, we are doing a concert down near you in a place called Quex Park." "Yes I know, we have tickets to see it." "Well, how would you like to be in it?" "Excuse me!" "I said, how would you like to be in it?" ] "Hahhahaha...who is this???" "This is obviously hard, but I am calling on behalf of Savage Garden." "Are you serious?" "YES!" I dropped the phone and then picked it up again. "Sorry, I wasn't really expecting this." "No, obviously not!!" "What were you saying?" "Well, as I said, we are playing in Quex Park this coming Saturday and our support band has had to pull out and we really need a new one. The band we did have has come down with flu. And so we have been asking around and you have come very very highly recommended by many people." "I don't know what to say." "Is there any chance we could hear you before we play?" "Sssure, we are playing this Friday, maybe you could come to that?" "Yes, we will have to change our schedule, but we do like to hear who is going to be playing with us before the venue as I am sure you will appreciate. If we decide to go with you, you will be representing us and you have to be good enough," he said very matter-a-factly. "Ok, well, I am gonna be very cheeky, will you do some songs with us on the Friday?" "Well, if we are going to be there, I don't see why not," he said. "Will you just turn up?" "No we would like to meet you. Could we meet you before?" "Sssure" I said. "Ok I am going to hand you over to my agent because he needs to talk to you. And I have to be somewhere." "Ok, I look forward to seeing you." "Me too. I want to see if what they say is true." Before I had a chance to ask what he was talking about, I was passed over. The agent asked me a load of questions and we talked for about half an hour. We arranged that they would pick us up and we would go get something to drink and then go on to our gig. I hung up the phone. "Shit, Robbie!" "What, what?" "We are going to meet Savage Garden. They are going to pick us up at six Friday night. Do you wanna know what else?" "SURE" "They said they would do some songs with us!" I ran to Robbie and gave him such a hug. "COME ON LETS GO FIND DAN AND KAZ" I practically screamed. As we ran downstairs, mum asked who was on the phone. "Only Savage Garden!!!" I shouted. "We are going to meet them on Friday," Robbie said. "NO WAY!" Tim shouted. "HELL YES!" we both said. Both mums smiled, and then I went out to the car. I floored the accelerator and we arrived at Kaz's at about eight thirty. Robbie ran up to the door and knocked. Kaz answered. "COME ON!" he shouted. "What?" "Come on" she grabbed her shoes and ran out to the car. I then drove off to Dan's. When we got there, I shut the engine off and we waited by the door. Dan opened the door. "Can we come in?" "Sure" "Ok guys, you want to know the really good news or the good news?" I asked. "Good news" "We may have a gig on Saturday with a huge band." "What's the really good news?" "Ok" I said taking a deep breath "We are meeting Savage Garden on Friday." Both Dan and Kaz's mouth's dropped open. "No shit?" "YESSSS" I said. "And they are going to play with us on Friday!!" Robbie chirped in. "So who is the gig with?" "They have asked us to be their support band!" I said. There were hugs and there was lots of talking. We were all so excited about what this may mean for our future. When Robbie and I got home it was the small hours of Wednesday.